what do you think about during sex?
March 6, 2007 11:34 PM Subscribe
what do you think about during sex?
your partner or the shopping list? what you're actually doing or what you dare not say? someone from the past or future?
they say sex really happens in your head but that aspect it is seldomly discussed. and why would it be - "I thought of you" sounds silly when the other person is present.
I am curious. is what I think about during sex similar to what's going on in the minds of others or not at all?
your partner or the shopping list? what you're actually doing or what you dare not say? someone from the past or future?
they say sex really happens in your head but that aspect it is seldomly discussed. and why would it be - "I thought of you" sounds silly when the other person is present.
I am curious. is what I think about during sex similar to what's going on in the minds of others or not at all?
This post was deleted for the following reason: This is chatfilter.
I tend not to think much at all; thinking goes by the board as I get lost in the moment.
posted by flabdablet at 11:48 PM on March 6, 2007
posted by flabdablet at 11:48 PM on March 6, 2007
See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis,
and only enough blood to run one at a time.
-- Robin Williams
posted by lee at 11:49 PM on March 6, 2007
and only enough blood to run one at a time.
-- Robin Williams
posted by lee at 11:49 PM on March 6, 2007
Don't get pregnant.... Don't get pregnant...
posted by idiotfactory at 11:51 PM on March 6, 2007 [3 favorites]
posted by idiotfactory at 11:51 PM on March 6, 2007 [3 favorites]
"When making love...when making love...in an effort...to prolong...the moment of ecstasy...I think of baseball players. All right, now you know. The two of us are making love violently, she's digging it, I figure I better start thinking of ballplayers quickly. So I figure it's one out, the ninth, the Giants are up. Mays lines a single to right, he takes second on a wild pitch. Now she is digging her nails into my neck. I decided to pinch-hit for McCovey. Alou pops out. Haller singles, Mays holds third. Now I got a first-and-third situation. Two out, the Giants are behind one run. I don't know whether to squeeze or steal. She's been in the shower for ten minutes, already. This is too...I can't tell you anymore, this is too personal. The Giants won."
-Woody Allen
posted by kyleg at 11:57 PM on March 6, 2007
-Woody Allen
posted by kyleg at 11:57 PM on March 6, 2007
Response by poster: It's traditional for you to go first with these sorts of questions.
last time, I wondered what other people thought about during sex, which is why this question appeared here.
posted by krautland at 11:58 PM on March 6, 2007
last time, I wondered what other people thought about during sex, which is why this question appeared here.
posted by krautland at 11:58 PM on March 6, 2007
I tend to think about having sex when I'm having sex. Is this a lack of imagination on my part?
posted by lekvar at 12:01 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
posted by lekvar at 12:01 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
Well, a mix of things.
Sometimes, what I want him to be doing, which usually gets said as appropriate.
Sometimes, weird insecure things, like, has he been getting off that I don't know about? He doesn't seem too into it...
Sometimes nonsequiturs of the most awful variety: things my mom said on the phone or my boss or whatever.
Sometimes, it isn't thinking at all, and some of those times, it's very distinct visuals. I love love love trying to keep track of these things: little foxes, leaded window panes, oranges, bark.... super random things the remain erotic for me to think about after the fact.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 12:10 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
Sometimes, what I want him to be doing, which usually gets said as appropriate.
Sometimes, weird insecure things, like, has he been getting off that I don't know about? He doesn't seem too into it...
Sometimes nonsequiturs of the most awful variety: things my mom said on the phone or my boss or whatever.
Sometimes, it isn't thinking at all, and some of those times, it's very distinct visuals. I love love love trying to keep track of these things: little foxes, leaded window panes, oranges, bark.... super random things the remain erotic for me to think about after the fact.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 12:10 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
Usually I'm not thinking much at all, although I can definitely think of some highly comical exceptions. Once my boyfriend quizzed me on calculus facts during the act. Just recently I ended an orgasm with "Hey, so I was just thinking, if you were going to get a tattoo what would you get?"
I have to admit I've thought about homework. Would that it were not so. I'm sure beyond a shadow of a doubt that he has too, though, so I'm going to call it even.
posted by crinklebat at 12:10 AM on March 7, 2007
I have to admit I've thought about homework. Would that it were not so. I'm sure beyond a shadow of a doubt that he has too, though, so I'm going to call it even.
posted by crinklebat at 12:10 AM on March 7, 2007
"I am so going to regret this tomorrow".
posted by cmonkey at 12:11 AM on March 7, 2007 [2 favorites]
posted by cmonkey at 12:11 AM on March 7, 2007 [2 favorites]
For certain kinds of sex, I'm not thinking about anything at all. Or rather, if you could transcribe what I'm thinking, it would look like this:
UUUUUUNNNNNNGGGG!!!!!!!!!!GGG!!!%^&$!!!!!!!!NGGGUUNNG!
Other times I think about times I had sex that were kind of like this time. Or I think "I hope this is working for her". (And then I ask). Or I think "fuck! today was rubbish day and i forgot to put the bin out!" And then with any luck I get back to UNGGG!
One of the things about getting older is the novelty factor wears off. Luckily the skill factor increases.
And everything Ambrosia Voyeur said, with the sexes flipped.
posted by i_am_joe's_spleen at 12:50 AM on March 7, 2007
UUUUUUNNNNNNGGGG!!!!!!!!!!GGG!!!%^&$!!!!!!!!NGGGUUNNG!
Other times I think about times I had sex that were kind of like this time. Or I think "I hope this is working for her". (And then I ask). Or I think "fuck! today was rubbish day and i forgot to put the bin out!" And then with any luck I get back to UNGGG!
One of the things about getting older is the novelty factor wears off. Luckily the skill factor increases.
And everything Ambrosia Voyeur said, with the sexes flipped.
posted by i_am_joe's_spleen at 12:50 AM on March 7, 2007
‘… I stop feeling her and try to imagine that I’m shagging Margaret Thatcher, Paul Daniels, Wallace Mercer, Jimmy Savile and other turn-offs, in order to bring myself off the boil.’
No, actually, I just thought referencing Trainspotting, in particular page 141 of this edition, was relevant.
posted by Aidan Kehoe at 12:54 AM on March 7, 2007
No, actually, I just thought referencing Trainspotting, in particular page 141 of this edition, was relevant.
posted by Aidan Kehoe at 12:54 AM on March 7, 2007
chatfilter.
no, that's what I think about during sex: chatfilter.
posted by nicwolff at 1:17 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
no, that's what I think about during sex: chatfilter.
posted by nicwolff at 1:17 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
Usually I'm wondering if I have enough cash or if I'm going to have to trudge to the ATM.
posted by Justinian at 1:21 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
posted by Justinian at 1:21 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
"Gosh, my tongue is ready to fall OFF."
posted by Dizzy at 1:30 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
posted by Dizzy at 1:30 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
"I hope she doesnt wake up"
posted by the cuban at 1:36 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
posted by the cuban at 1:36 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
"I wonder if she's into threesomes" EVERYTIME.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 2:28 AM on March 7, 2007
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 2:28 AM on March 7, 2007
"Beige... I think I'll paint the ceiling beige..."
posted by sparkletone at 2:45 AM on March 7, 2007
posted by sparkletone at 2:45 AM on March 7, 2007
During sex...
I'm trying to keep track of how long the ropes have been on, especially if they're on her breasts. I'm constantly on the lookout for telltale signs that will help me predict when she's going to cum so that I can stop her just short of the climax. I'm trying not to get lube on the bed. I'm trying to think of things that, when whispered in her ear, will scare the piss out of her. I'm deciding whether to use the crop or the cane. Etc.
Of course, that's if I'm topping. When I bottom, I focus mostly on following instructions and not talking any more than necessary. I also think about how I shouldn't be thinking so much, that I should just be enjoying it.
But there's always the background noise as well, most of which seems to concern my physical comfort; positions that are hard on one body part or another, the temperature in the room, etc.
posted by Clay201 at 5:00 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
I'm trying to keep track of how long the ropes have been on, especially if they're on her breasts. I'm constantly on the lookout for telltale signs that will help me predict when she's going to cum so that I can stop her just short of the climax. I'm trying not to get lube on the bed. I'm trying to think of things that, when whispered in her ear, will scare the piss out of her. I'm deciding whether to use the crop or the cane. Etc.
Of course, that's if I'm topping. When I bottom, I focus mostly on following instructions and not talking any more than necessary. I also think about how I shouldn't be thinking so much, that I should just be enjoying it.
But there's always the background noise as well, most of which seems to concern my physical comfort; positions that are hard on one body part or another, the temperature in the room, etc.
posted by Clay201 at 5:00 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
"I should have warmed her up in a tub of hot water first"
posted by redteam at 5:00 AM on March 7, 2007
posted by redteam at 5:00 AM on March 7, 2007
"Why do I come an hour before him? How do I still sound interested until he finishes?"
posted by b33j at 5:07 AM on March 7, 2007
posted by b33j at 5:07 AM on March 7, 2007
Mostly, porn, unless I'm blowing him. Then I'm pretty focused in the moment, because damn that's a sensitive area.
posted by muddgirl at 5:22 AM on March 7, 2007
posted by muddgirl at 5:22 AM on March 7, 2007
"I'm paying for this, she should pretend to be more into it!"
posted by thilmony at 5:24 AM on March 7, 2007
posted by thilmony at 5:24 AM on March 7, 2007
"Why can't I have tentacles?"
posted by mr_book at 5:42 AM on March 7, 2007 [2 favorites]
posted by mr_book at 5:42 AM on March 7, 2007 [2 favorites]
Why it doesn't feel as good as the media makes it out to be.
posted by wackybrit at 5:48 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
posted by wackybrit at 5:48 AM on March 7, 2007 [1 favorite]
Quite often I think about someone who isn't my husband.
posted by scratch at 6:19 AM on March 7, 2007
posted by scratch at 6:19 AM on March 7, 2007
Umm, well, since you asked,
I think of melons, space travel, smoking
guns and salty orifices: my heart
is a high-soaring falcon, etc.
Naturally the Big Bang,
and the Marx Brothers film:
A Day at the Races
Or I think of my nose,
exploring like a bloodhound
the sweet trail of scent
between your legs
Or my hard and brilliant cock,
a glowing rocket docked
inside your hot little
after-burner
While I cruise the hyperspace
between your alien eyes,
and my sperm startreks
through the galaxy
like a billion tiny colonists
lost in orgasmic diaspora
posted by plainfeather at 6:22 AM on March 7, 2007
I think of melons, space travel, smoking
guns and salty orifices: my heart
is a high-soaring falcon, etc.
Naturally the Big Bang,
and the Marx Brothers film:
A Day at the Races
Or I think of my nose,
exploring like a bloodhound
the sweet trail of scent
between your legs
Or my hard and brilliant cock,
a glowing rocket docked
inside your hot little
after-burner
While I cruise the hyperspace
between your alien eyes,
and my sperm startreks
through the galaxy
like a billion tiny colonists
lost in orgasmic diaspora
posted by plainfeather at 6:22 AM on March 7, 2007
I think about how good it feels. And if I think it could feel better, I communicate with my partner until we get it right.
I used to think about orgasm, but that just makes it impossible to achieve, makes the experience purely goal-based, which isn't as satisfactory, and holy crap can you say performance anxiety?
I have found myself thinking about inane things. That's when I know the sex is mediocre. These experiences happen to the best of us. They're a sign that you need to communicate with your partner that something isn't quite working with you, that you need to try something new, or they need to "pet" you some other way.
posted by Menomena at 6:30 AM on March 7, 2007
I used to think about orgasm, but that just makes it impossible to achieve, makes the experience purely goal-based, which isn't as satisfactory, and holy crap can you say performance anxiety?
I have found myself thinking about inane things. That's when I know the sex is mediocre. These experiences happen to the best of us. They're a sign that you need to communicate with your partner that something isn't quite working with you, that you need to try something new, or they need to "pet" you some other way.
posted by Menomena at 6:30 AM on March 7, 2007
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by tkolar at 11:39 PM on March 6, 2007