On what dating app can I look at profiles without being seen at all?

September 20, 2023 12:52 PM

I’m being asked to look at some dating profiles to get some perspective because I believe that swipey apps are toxic. I am absolutely not trying to date anyone and do not want to be seen looking, appear in anyone’s feed, or otherwise have to engage with anyone. I’m using a fake email and will not use a photo of me. Do I have any options for looking at profiles in completely private mode? Preferably free options? I’m in the US. If you have an answer to this specific question, please mention which app and the process. Only actual answers, please.
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (10 answers total)

You can set your browsing to private in many apps but it’s never free. I know Bumble and Hinge have this option or at least did a few months ago. The truth is that the whole point of dating apps to make money, not find dates, so anything beyond the bare minimum will cost you.
posted by smorgasbord at 1:05 PM on September 20, 2023

Not sure, but one option is to use a historical photo (just so the computer can see it is a picture of a person) and not check your inbox. I guess also if you swipe 'no' on everyone, they generally can't message you anyway.
posted by catquas at 1:17 PM on September 20, 2023

If you want additional perspective on dating apps, I would encourage you to listen to the recent season of Land of the Giants podcast, which does a deep dive on dating apps. While this doesn't quite directly answer your question, I do think this suggestion is relevant as it will give you some backstory to why you're seeing what you're seeing on the apps (particularly why you see such a small pool of people).
posted by brookeb at 1:17 PM on September 20, 2023

For your experiment to actually work, you are going to have to actually engage with the sites - use a dedicated email, a fake photo, and swipe as you would, but just don't respond to anyone. That's not that weird - lots of people engage/email but get no response back, so no-one will even know. If you are doing this for work for for a legitimate research project (and not personal use) the costs of signing up can possibly be written off on your taxes.
posted by The_Vegetables at 1:32 PM on September 20, 2023

Sorry I meant dedicated email - toxic behavior has to include responses to you, doesn't it? Dedicated to this project that you can abandon once it's over.
posted by The_Vegetables at 1:34 PM on September 20, 2023

As of the last time I was using dating apps (a year to 18 months ago depending on the app) you could do this with a Tinder Plus or Tinder Gold membership (and then go into your settings and switch on private/incognito mode). Bumble also has a private/incognito option with a paid membership, but I remember getting occasional “likes” even when I had private mode on. So based on my personal experience I would trust the Tinder option more. Although it’s possible that because I was toggling private/incognito mode off and on occasionally, I would still be in another user’s swipe queue and switching to incognito didn’t clear that, so you probably won’t experience that on Bumble if you just have it always set on.

I don’t think any of the major apps lets you use incognito mode for free, and I’m not sure if Hinge has the option at all.
posted by scorpion proof at 1:57 PM on September 20, 2023

The other alternative is for whoever wants you to look at these, to send you screenshots of the kinds of profiles they’re hoping you’ll see. You don’t need to connect with the apps at all for that, just open the image files you get sent.
posted by penguin pie at 2:10 PM on September 20, 2023

Bloom allows you to turn off the Profiles section of the app. You can still see people's profiles through the Events part of the app. Other people would only be able to find you if you RSVP to events. It is free. It has a focus on queer, polyamorous, kinky, spiritual, alternative communities.

People publish photos of their profiles on Reddit (try r/hingeapp and r/tinder, there are probably more) asking for feedback, but that also might not be a broad enough sample.

I have a lot of thoughts about dating apps and would love to chat if you're open to discussion via memail or elsewhere.
posted by meemzi at 2:42 PM on September 20, 2023

You can use match.com for free to browse profiles in a browser using the "search" feature and you are not required to post a photo or any identifying information.

Bumble, Tinder, and Feeld all have "incognito" mode with a paid subscription, which means no one will see your profile unless you swipe right on them. So, you can see as many profiles as you want privately as long as you always swipe left.
posted by TurkishGolds at 4:47 PM on September 20, 2023

You can browse profiles on OKCupid on a browser, so give it a try in incognito mode with your fake email. I don't know how you'd keep people from seeing your profile without them seeing yours if you don't pay, however. So I'd say to set up a fake, lightly populated profile. It's also important to note that you'll see different profiles based on how folks react to you, so if the most popular profile-people swipe left on you, you'll see increasingly less popular people.
posted by bluedaisy at 8:32 PM on September 20, 2023