My wife texted info to herself and got “who’s this?” In reply. Wha?!?

April 29, 2023 4:46 AM

Twice this week my wife texted herself from her iPhone (once some info and once a pic) and each time she received a “reply” from herself saying “who’s this?” Second time there was no question mark. What the heck is going on? (iPhone SE 2nd gen, T-mobile, NY state)
posted by chr1sb0y to Technology (9 answers total)

Was the full number (area code, even country code?) definitely the same as hers?
What steps did she use to text herself?
posted by trig at 5:14 AM on April 29, 2023

This is the behaviour I would expect to experience if I'd made a typo while creating the contact list entry for myself.

It's a mistake that could go undetected for a long time, given that the expected effect of texting oneself is usually achieved without actually needing to receive a message from the network. The expected behaviour of a self-contact that's correctly set up is hard to tell apart from that of one that isn't.

So that's the first thing I'd check.
posted by flabdablet at 5:16 AM on April 29, 2023

Is she using an email address connected to her Messages account and perhaps there is a typo in the email? Or maybe an assumption if it is a gmail account?

In iPhone settings go to Messages > Send & Receive

Is there one or more email addresses and are those addresses hers?

I ask about assumptions with gmail because I have heard stories of people who use periods/full stops in their addresses and leaving them out somehow sends the message to someone with a similar email address.
posted by terrapin at 5:43 AM on April 29, 2023

I'm with terrapin. There may be multiple phone numbers hooked up to iMessages.
posted by JoeZydeco at 6:05 AM on April 29, 2023

Hmm - mostly solved, should have dug deeper before posting. Somehow her contacts had an unknown number in her own listing of herself. So she had been texting herself for years but no one had that # or didn’t care, and she could see her outgoing reminder texts.

Oddly now that I fixed her contacts, texts to herself still don’t come through to her - just shows her outgoing msgs. My phone “receives “ texts to myself. So I see the outgoing and received. Weird.
posted by chr1sb0y at 6:38 AM on April 29, 2023

When I want to text myself I always type in my full phone number instead of using a contact. I’ve found Apple’s handling of contacts, identity, and multiple devices associated with an Apple ID to be unpredictable at best.
posted by staggernation at 6:58 AM on April 29, 2023

When I text myself I use the iCloud address apple gives me.
posted by terrapin at 9:15 AM on April 29, 2023

I'd have her text "herself" and you, and see what shows up on your phone for recipients.
posted by Pronoiac at 10:22 PM on April 29, 2023

I'm sorry, but I'm sitting here laughing that possibly for years some poor person has been getting enigmatic texts of "pick up dry cleaning", "remember Jane's birthday". Hopefully their life is better for it.
posted by Dotty at 6:15 AM on May 1, 2023