My propery is much bigger than I remembered while awake
January 13, 2022 5:39 PM Subscribe
Do you have real-estate dreams? I do, and they are very similar...
My dreams have themes: I'm often at a childhood home (of which I had several, parents were divorced and moved around).
* Parents were well off so the homes were ample.
* Common theme: there's a room (or wing, or peninsula) that I forgot about.
* Often a surprise door opens to a new location in the house.
* Mostly my feeling is "Oh, I forgot about this place" rather than "I've never seen this before".
* emotions are usually practical - "oh shit this is dirty, I'll have to clean it up" or "those kids using our 3rd hot tub I forgot about are wasting energy"
* if there is a movement, the movement is always up. Walking or taking ladders from basements to attics, never the opposite.
* usually the "new rooms" are empty of people, and it's more like a puzzle (how do I get out, how do I care for this space") there is usually very little people conflict.
I have sub-clinical OCD so the anxiety about something (that doesn't actually exist) makes perfect sense.
I'm just curious: for you psychonauts, Freudians or Jungians or whatever.
What does it really mean?
Most recent dream:
While checking our hot-tub (which has a small leak) I remembered that we had 2 other hot tubs (on a parcel of land I had forgotten). While checking them, I saw that the second (extra) tub had been taken over by our neighbor kids, who were skateboarding in the tub. At one point my friend (my age: old) and I jumped in the tub and were kind of yeeted out via some tube into a different tub.
(I may have watched the latest Matrix movie just before this happened)
My dreams have themes: I'm often at a childhood home (of which I had several, parents were divorced and moved around).
* Parents were well off so the homes were ample.
* Common theme: there's a room (or wing, or peninsula) that I forgot about.
* Often a surprise door opens to a new location in the house.
* Mostly my feeling is "Oh, I forgot about this place" rather than "I've never seen this before".
* emotions are usually practical - "oh shit this is dirty, I'll have to clean it up" or "those kids using our 3rd hot tub I forgot about are wasting energy"
* if there is a movement, the movement is always up. Walking or taking ladders from basements to attics, never the opposite.
* usually the "new rooms" are empty of people, and it's more like a puzzle (how do I get out, how do I care for this space") there is usually very little people conflict.
I have sub-clinical OCD so the anxiety about something (that doesn't actually exist) makes perfect sense.
I'm just curious: for you psychonauts, Freudians or Jungians or whatever.
What does it really mean?
Most recent dream:
While checking our hot-tub (which has a small leak) I remembered that we had 2 other hot tubs (on a parcel of land I had forgotten). While checking them, I saw that the second (extra) tub had been taken over by our neighbor kids, who were skateboarding in the tub. At one point my friend (my age: old) and I jumped in the tub and were kind of yeeted out via some tube into a different tub.
(I may have watched the latest Matrix movie just before this happened)
When I was a kid I used to dream there was a special room in my parents basement I had never seen before that held all the toys taken away from me in my youth. More recently I dream about being in my parents messy basement, but nothing mystical or odd. Just sad.
posted by Geckwoistmeinauto at 6:01 PM on January 13, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by Geckwoistmeinauto at 6:01 PM on January 13, 2022 [2 favorites]
I had a super fascinating twitter convo with a bunch of people several years ago, when I first found out I wasn't the only person with hidden room (some interpretations offered there) dreams.
It fascinates me that I am almost always like "aw shit, I totally forgot I had all this extra space/set all this up already!!" It's a really happy but also bonks self on forehead moment. The rooms are often filled with things I have a warm nostalgic feeling about.
The more bittersweet version of this is that I suddenly remember I didn't move my pets out of a house I previously lived in, and I rush back there to find them patiently waiting on me, like "'bout time, you goof, I'm so happy to see you!" These are almost always pets that have passed, and they do generally have that feeling of a "visitation dream" - I am horrified at myself that I forgot my dog at an old house for ten years, but I am so so happy to see him again.
The details of both these types of dream stick with me in ways that the details of most of my dreams do not. I can still describe at least three "hidden wings" from past dreams and the circumstances of most of my forgotten dog dreams.
posted by Lyn Never at 6:09 PM on January 13, 2022 [8 favorites]
It fascinates me that I am almost always like "aw shit, I totally forgot I had all this extra space/set all this up already!!" It's a really happy but also bonks self on forehead moment. The rooms are often filled with things I have a warm nostalgic feeling about.
The more bittersweet version of this is that I suddenly remember I didn't move my pets out of a house I previously lived in, and I rush back there to find them patiently waiting on me, like "'bout time, you goof, I'm so happy to see you!" These are almost always pets that have passed, and they do generally have that feeling of a "visitation dream" - I am horrified at myself that I forgot my dog at an old house for ten years, but I am so so happy to see him again.
The details of both these types of dream stick with me in ways that the details of most of my dreams do not. I can still describe at least three "hidden wings" from past dreams and the circumstances of most of my forgotten dog dreams.
posted by Lyn Never at 6:09 PM on January 13, 2022 [8 favorites]
Response by poster: special room in my parents basement I had never seen before that held all the toys taken away from me in my youth
Superb!
In my actual youth we had a basement box of toys that were forgotten (tinkertoys etc.) As an adult (not actually adult) I stashed my empty beer cans there. About 10 years later, when I was in college, my mother mentioned "We found a lot of beer cans in the tinkertoy box, I wonder if you know anything about that" (dear reader, I am an only child and as god is my witness, I LIED LIED LIED) :-)
posted by soylent00FF00 at 6:13 PM on January 13, 2022 [6 favorites]
Superb!
In my actual youth we had a basement box of toys that were forgotten (tinkertoys etc.) As an adult (not actually adult) I stashed my empty beer cans there. About 10 years later, when I was in college, my mother mentioned "We found a lot of beer cans in the tinkertoy box, I wonder if you know anything about that" (dear reader, I am an only child and as god is my witness, I LIED LIED LIED) :-)
posted by soylent00FF00 at 6:13 PM on January 13, 2022 [6 favorites]
Many of my dreams involve buildings or neighborhoods and they are rarely the exact same as the ones in real life. Often the dream involves pieces and features of various places mushed together. I once dreamt about a restaurant booth in the lobby of my church! Most of the time there is a task to be done, like moving or finding the car after parking it. I've always assumed they were anxiety dreams.
There is rarely more than one person with me, but they are always familiar. In most cases, I live in the place but my husband is not there. It is often a random coworker or fellow student, only rarely is it anyone I am close to. I have not figured that part out yet.
posted by soelo at 6:28 PM on January 13, 2022 [1 favorite]
There is rarely more than one person with me, but they are always familiar. In most cases, I live in the place but my husband is not there. It is often a random coworker or fellow student, only rarely is it anyone I am close to. I have not figured that part out yet.
posted by soelo at 6:28 PM on January 13, 2022 [1 favorite]
Oh my GOD. I dream this dream on the regular. For 15 years now. I find a section of my house I’ve totally forgotten about and have to paint / redo flooring / strip wallpaper.
My analysis: so as a person, I’m like constantly peeling away layers of myself thru self-inquiry and meditation. So I take the dream to mean I’ve peeled another layer again and having found a new corner of my psyche, am now doing more “mental housekeeping” so to speak.
Interesting to note: in the last few years my husband is now a factor: it’s our house and he is helping me renovate.
posted by St. Peepsburg at 6:41 PM on January 13, 2022 [7 favorites]
My analysis: so as a person, I’m like constantly peeling away layers of myself thru self-inquiry and meditation. So I take the dream to mean I’ve peeled another layer again and having found a new corner of my psyche, am now doing more “mental housekeeping” so to speak.
Interesting to note: in the last few years my husband is now a factor: it’s our house and he is helping me renovate.
posted by St. Peepsburg at 6:41 PM on January 13, 2022 [7 favorites]
Yeah I have these dreams a lot. Both "how did I never know or forget this room was here" and "wow what a dramatic remodel" varieties. I consider "new room" dreams to be dreams about viewing one's past or self through new eyes - realizing that I had capacities I didn't recognize, or newly understanding the perspectives of my relatives, or seeing a side of a situation I didn't see before. And "dramatic remodel" dreams are about the anxiety that it's been too long since I checked in with a person or place and they might have changed beyond recognition. I'm sure I'm having more of those right now (had one a few nights ago, in fact) because it's been three years since I've been to my childhood home, where my parents still live, and which I know has in fact been dramatically remodeled since the last time I was back. On some level not having seen it is clearly stressing me out. But I've had these dreams for years.
In my dreams though, finding the forgotten room is always a relief. "Oh good, more room for the kids' things." I have a very cluttered house.
posted by potrzebie at 6:44 PM on January 13, 2022 [5 favorites]
In my dreams though, finding the forgotten room is always a relief. "Oh good, more room for the kids' things." I have a very cluttered house.
posted by potrzebie at 6:44 PM on January 13, 2022 [5 favorites]
* Common theme: there's a room (or wing, or peninsula) that I forgot about.
* Often a surprise door opens to a new location in the house.
* Mostly my feeling is "Oh, I forgot about this place" rather than "I've never seen this before".
I have this dream all the time, though often it is a house I am living in (i.e. not my actual house that I live in, but I am living at house such and such and oh yeah, there's a whole other floor.). Often I think "Oh yes, this is something I liked about the house when I chose it! I can't believe I haven't been using it."
It has never occurred to me to clean the space. It is usually clean and furnished and just fine. Like a staged space from a real estate show.
It fascinates me that I am almost always like "aw shit, I totally forgot I had all this extra space/set all this up already!!" It's a really happy but also bonks self on forehead moment.
Yep, this is the general tone/mood when I find a forgotten room.
The more bittersweet version of this is that I suddenly remember I didn't move my pets out of a house I previously lived in, and I rush back there to find them patiently waiting on me, like "'bout time, you goof, I'm so happy to see you!"
Similar, I have many times had dreams about a pet that I forgot I had and so hadn't fed in weeks or months. The pet is usually skinny but alive. I think sometimes it's a pet I've agreed to sit and forgotten about. It's never been an actual real pet of mine past or present. These dreams feel like the "forgot I was taking a course now have to take the exam" kind of dream.
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 6:57 PM on January 13, 2022 [4 favorites]
* Often a surprise door opens to a new location in the house.
* Mostly my feeling is "Oh, I forgot about this place" rather than "I've never seen this before".
I have this dream all the time, though often it is a house I am living in (i.e. not my actual house that I live in, but I am living at house such and such and oh yeah, there's a whole other floor.). Often I think "Oh yes, this is something I liked about the house when I chose it! I can't believe I haven't been using it."
It has never occurred to me to clean the space. It is usually clean and furnished and just fine. Like a staged space from a real estate show.
It fascinates me that I am almost always like "aw shit, I totally forgot I had all this extra space/set all this up already!!" It's a really happy but also bonks self on forehead moment.
Yep, this is the general tone/mood when I find a forgotten room.
The more bittersweet version of this is that I suddenly remember I didn't move my pets out of a house I previously lived in, and I rush back there to find them patiently waiting on me, like "'bout time, you goof, I'm so happy to see you!"
Similar, I have many times had dreams about a pet that I forgot I had and so hadn't fed in weeks or months. The pet is usually skinny but alive. I think sometimes it's a pet I've agreed to sit and forgotten about. It's never been an actual real pet of mine past or present. These dreams feel like the "forgot I was taking a course now have to take the exam" kind of dream.
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 6:57 PM on January 13, 2022 [4 favorites]
Oh, and I should add, I'm not meditating or working on myself at all, so at least for me it definitely doesn't mean that. LOL
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 7:03 PM on January 13, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 7:03 PM on January 13, 2022 [2 favorites]
Briefly--
It reads as if your childhood world is calling. You may have taken for granted parts of your past that you could reconnect with now, for a fuller life. There's much more room for exciting growth--for who you are and want to be--in your own past than you may realize.
The dream symbols suggest to me that it may be a good time to reconnect with your past--you might find it interesting, fun, and transformative. Perhaps different, probably a good different.
I'd look at recent events that went well or were interesting to you. Those events may have been a sort of symbolic doorway for your inner intuition and emotion. One or both of those two systems of perception seem to think you have an opportunity for a reset or an early start on something great.
--Quick go from a dream analysis hobbyist
posted by circular at 7:10 PM on January 13, 2022
It reads as if your childhood world is calling. You may have taken for granted parts of your past that you could reconnect with now, for a fuller life. There's much more room for exciting growth--for who you are and want to be--in your own past than you may realize.
The dream symbols suggest to me that it may be a good time to reconnect with your past--you might find it interesting, fun, and transformative. Perhaps different, probably a good different.
I'd look at recent events that went well or were interesting to you. Those events may have been a sort of symbolic doorway for your inner intuition and emotion. One or both of those two systems of perception seem to think you have an opportunity for a reset or an early start on something great.
--Quick go from a dream analysis hobbyist
posted by circular at 7:10 PM on January 13, 2022
I have this dream often (and think it's very common!). In my case, I've been living in a studio apartment in real life and literally want more space, and it does seem related to that...
posted by pinochiette at 7:15 PM on January 13, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by pinochiette at 7:15 PM on January 13, 2022 [1 favorite]
My grandparents had a wonderful house (sold in 1985) that has a whole bunch of new-to-me rooms I’m always discovering whenever I dream about it.
posted by shadygrove at 7:34 PM on January 13, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by shadygrove at 7:34 PM on January 13, 2022 [2 favorites]
Yeah, so I work in real estate marketing (I do photography and measuring/floor plan drafting).
I dream about houses (and/or, work) during many nights' sleeps, almost without fail finding extra rooms, obstacles, secret passages etc and other obstacles that make doing my job impossible..
When you say "Oh, I forgot about this", it really resonates.. there is almost always this passing familiarity with everything I encounter in my house dreams, but not limited to just those ones.. songs I hear, non-house places I visit, things I am doing.. there is almost always an undercurrent of "oh yes, this!" in my dreams, despite being completely made up by my subconscious.
Thanks for prompting me to think about this!
posted by wats at 7:57 PM on January 13, 2022 [1 favorite]
I dream about houses (and/or, work) during many nights' sleeps, almost without fail finding extra rooms, obstacles, secret passages etc and other obstacles that make doing my job impossible..
When you say "Oh, I forgot about this", it really resonates.. there is almost always this passing familiarity with everything I encounter in my house dreams, but not limited to just those ones.. songs I hear, non-house places I visit, things I am doing.. there is almost always an undercurrent of "oh yes, this!" in my dreams, despite being completely made up by my subconscious.
Thanks for prompting me to think about this!
posted by wats at 7:57 PM on January 13, 2022 [1 favorite]
According to two psychologists I know, a dream about discovering new rooms in your home is a dream about finding new, previously hidden parts of yourself. In both Jungian and Freudian dream interpretation, every aspect or character or significant object in a dream represents YOU, first and foremost. The house is you. The new rooms are you, expanding into yourself. It's supposed to be a pretty good dream, as these things go, a sign of growing and maturing and experimenting and feeling ever more at home in yourself without stagnating.
If your dream involved water, especially running or flowing water, it's supposed to be a symbol for your mother. (For me it's usually a sign that I need to pee irl, ymmv with this, lol.) Oh and if the new rooms hold living things (like the kids you saw, or a garden, or fish) that's nice, it's a sign that the new parts of yourself that you're discovering are life-giving, so to speak.
posted by MiraK at 7:58 PM on January 13, 2022 [4 favorites]
If your dream involved water, especially running or flowing water, it's supposed to be a symbol for your mother. (For me it's usually a sign that I need to pee irl, ymmv with this, lol.) Oh and if the new rooms hold living things (like the kids you saw, or a garden, or fish) that's nice, it's a sign that the new parts of yourself that you're discovering are life-giving, so to speak.
posted by MiraK at 7:58 PM on January 13, 2022 [4 favorites]
Wow, I’m not the only one? Yes, this dominates my dream world. Either I am in my childhood home but it’s a ______ (hotel, dorm, etc.), or I am in a house where I find another entire area.
Once it was my grandma’s house, but a hidden door led up a set of steps to a part I’d never seen before.
Several times, it’s been a rental home that I thought I was familiar with, but hello! here’s another section with its own kitchenette and living room.
Usually I am intrigued by these finds.
Possible interpretations:
These other rooms represent new areas of growth for me.
My current house is too small for my liking.
I’m an introvert wishing for privacy and solitude.
posted by Knowyournuts at 8:07 PM on January 13, 2022 [3 favorites]
Once it was my grandma’s house, but a hidden door led up a set of steps to a part I’d never seen before.
Several times, it’s been a rental home that I thought I was familiar with, but hello! here’s another section with its own kitchenette and living room.
Usually I am intrigued by these finds.
Possible interpretations:
These other rooms represent new areas of growth for me.
My current house is too small for my liking.
I’m an introvert wishing for privacy and solitude.
posted by Knowyournuts at 8:07 PM on January 13, 2022 [3 favorites]
I feel like most simply, house dreams are about your house. In your case, it seems like you might have some anxiety about upkeep, etc.
My husband apparently has frequent recurring dreams in which he discovers that under our house we have a secret extra area (which he'd read about happening in Europe, where buildings were built on top of older buildings). I think in his case it's that he wants 1) a "secret" place to stash things safely 2) to find something neat and hidden, and most importantly, 3) more storage space. Our house is pretty large in square footage for two people, but it's very short on closets and we are both stuff-accumulators.
posted by LadyOscar at 8:20 PM on January 13, 2022 [2 favorites]
My husband apparently has frequent recurring dreams in which he discovers that under our house we have a secret extra area (which he'd read about happening in Europe, where buildings were built on top of older buildings). I think in his case it's that he wants 1) a "secret" place to stash things safely 2) to find something neat and hidden, and most importantly, 3) more storage space. Our house is pretty large in square footage for two people, but it's very short on closets and we are both stuff-accumulators.
posted by LadyOscar at 8:20 PM on January 13, 2022 [2 favorites]
As a data point, I have never had this kind of dream before in my life, and the concept of a recurring dream like this was so disturbing to me that I immediately thought, “You’re in an episode of [psychological horror podcast].”
So the fact that you don’t get particularly creepy vibes in any way might be a useful thing to think about! It likely doesn’t represent a fear, or at least not a significant one. I like the “finding parts of myself” interpretation.
(Let’s see if I have a dream about this tonight!)
posted by brook horse at 9:03 PM on January 13, 2022 [2 favorites]
So the fact that you don’t get particularly creepy vibes in any way might be a useful thing to think about! It likely doesn’t represent a fear, or at least not a significant one. I like the “finding parts of myself” interpretation.
(Let’s see if I have a dream about this tonight!)
posted by brook horse at 9:03 PM on January 13, 2022 [2 favorites]
Traditionally houses in dreams are metaphors for your own psyche. That interpretation can lead to all sorts of insights into things that have been neglected as well as places your self image is much richer than you think.
I currently live in a house that literally has a room in the back that I pretend doesn’t exist. It shows up in my dreams a lot and it’s always interesting to see what I populate it with.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 10:40 PM on January 13, 2022
I currently live in a house that literally has a room in the back that I pretend doesn’t exist. It shows up in my dreams a lot and it’s always interesting to see what I populate it with.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 10:40 PM on January 13, 2022
I don’t remember most of my dreams but I have the “how on earth did I forget about all this extra space” dream about once a year and those ones are vividly memorable.
Like others in the thread, I have that same feeling of bonking myself on the forehead. Sometimes I have to climb up to get to the space. Usually the space is pretty nice although sometimes it’s hard / unpleasant to enter (like I have to shimmy through an attic tunnel).
Often the decor in the room is noticeably outdated, and often finding the room solves another problem of needing space or storage or a guest room.
posted by nouvelle-personne at 1:06 AM on January 14, 2022 [1 favorite]
Like others in the thread, I have that same feeling of bonking myself on the forehead. Sometimes I have to climb up to get to the space. Usually the space is pretty nice although sometimes it’s hard / unpleasant to enter (like I have to shimmy through an attic tunnel).
Often the decor in the room is noticeably outdated, and often finding the room solves another problem of needing space or storage or a guest room.
posted by nouvelle-personne at 1:06 AM on January 14, 2022 [1 favorite]
I have these dreams too. One of the earliest dreams I remember having as a kid involved finding a secret passageway in our kitchen and when I went through, I found an impossibly vast space filled with staircases. The edges of the space faded to darkness. I couldn’t see where any of the stairs led to. And my grandparents were walking on one of the staircases in the distance. They were far enough away that they didn’t see me. It was scary but thrilling. I was obviously not supposed to find out about this place. I went back into the kitchen and couldn’t find the passageway anymore, it disappeared. I spent the rest of the dream trying to find that passageway again. The thing that struck me most about this secret space was the dark red carpeting on the stairs. It was the same musty carpeting that I attribute to a medical building that I visited once with my parents. I remember that building giving me a weird feeling, like it was stuck in a different time. I can’t even be sure that I actually saw that carpet in that building, but I feel certain that I did. The building still exists and every time I drive by it, I feel an urge to go inside and look for that red carpet, though if it ever did exist it’s probably long since been torn out.
In my most recent version of the hidden/secret/forgotten room dream, I found out I had a closet full of amazing clothes. And I was really excited that I had all these cool things to wear, I couldn’t wait to start trying stuff on. It was a very girly Paris-Hilton-esque dressing room complete with maribou accessories, and the clothes were all fun and colorful. I believe that dream is the flipside of another series of recurring dreams I have, where I urgently need to pack a bag or suitcase and go somewhere, but I find my closet empty, or I have nothing appropriate to wear or nothing goes together, and can’t decide what to bring. I go into a panic, the minutes and hours fly by, and before I know it it’s too late and I’ve missed my trip. The packed closet of cool clothes dream is a new one for me, I’ve never had it before.
Another living space type of dream I have is where my current home is suddenly much larger and more luxurious. And sometimes I have that experience of pleasant surprise, like “Wow I live here?” But other times it feels like I’ve had that space all along. The home is fully decorated and furnished. The last time I had one of those dreams, I was legitimately disappointed when I woke up to find myself in the reality of a much smaller home than I had grown accustomed to in the dream.
I also have the exact same bathroom dreams as jessamyn. I recurrently dream of bathrooms with a billion stalls and no doors (or the doors are very odd heights that give zero privacy) and having to pick a corner or something that exposes me the least. The bathrooms are also usually in bad condition, old, with slanting walls and floors, peeling paint, and broken toilets that are all crowded together. Very distressing. On the flipside, I also dream of bathrooms that are private but also intimate feeling. I don’t know how else to describe them. They’re usually dimly lit, the air is warm and humid, and there is lots and lots of warm water. Either a huge bathtub to soak in, or a lush shower. These bathrooms are very comforting to be in, almost like a womb. In these dreams I want to stay in there and just listen to the sounds of the water and feel warm, but there’s a feeling that I need to hurry and finish up my bath.
I also have recurring dreams about schools, getting lost in the hallways and being unable to find the right classroom, forgetting where my locker is, as well as the outdoor spaces like playgrounds. In my dreams the playgrounds are of a deadly scale - very high and the bars so far apart that you couldn’t possibly climb them. If you fell from the monkey bars in my dreams you would surely die. Which is odd since I loooooved climbing everything as a kid, my mom called me a monkey because she couldn’t stop me from climbing things.
posted by keep it under cover at 1:59 AM on January 14, 2022
In my most recent version of the hidden/secret/forgotten room dream, I found out I had a closet full of amazing clothes. And I was really excited that I had all these cool things to wear, I couldn’t wait to start trying stuff on. It was a very girly Paris-Hilton-esque dressing room complete with maribou accessories, and the clothes were all fun and colorful. I believe that dream is the flipside of another series of recurring dreams I have, where I urgently need to pack a bag or suitcase and go somewhere, but I find my closet empty, or I have nothing appropriate to wear or nothing goes together, and can’t decide what to bring. I go into a panic, the minutes and hours fly by, and before I know it it’s too late and I’ve missed my trip. The packed closet of cool clothes dream is a new one for me, I’ve never had it before.
Another living space type of dream I have is where my current home is suddenly much larger and more luxurious. And sometimes I have that experience of pleasant surprise, like “Wow I live here?” But other times it feels like I’ve had that space all along. The home is fully decorated and furnished. The last time I had one of those dreams, I was legitimately disappointed when I woke up to find myself in the reality of a much smaller home than I had grown accustomed to in the dream.
I also have the exact same bathroom dreams as jessamyn. I recurrently dream of bathrooms with a billion stalls and no doors (or the doors are very odd heights that give zero privacy) and having to pick a corner or something that exposes me the least. The bathrooms are also usually in bad condition, old, with slanting walls and floors, peeling paint, and broken toilets that are all crowded together. Very distressing. On the flipside, I also dream of bathrooms that are private but also intimate feeling. I don’t know how else to describe them. They’re usually dimly lit, the air is warm and humid, and there is lots and lots of warm water. Either a huge bathtub to soak in, or a lush shower. These bathrooms are very comforting to be in, almost like a womb. In these dreams I want to stay in there and just listen to the sounds of the water and feel warm, but there’s a feeling that I need to hurry and finish up my bath.
I also have recurring dreams about schools, getting lost in the hallways and being unable to find the right classroom, forgetting where my locker is, as well as the outdoor spaces like playgrounds. In my dreams the playgrounds are of a deadly scale - very high and the bars so far apart that you couldn’t possibly climb them. If you fell from the monkey bars in my dreams you would surely die. Which is odd since I loooooved climbing everything as a kid, my mom called me a monkey because she couldn’t stop me from climbing things.
posted by keep it under cover at 1:59 AM on January 14, 2022
I occasionally have dreams in which I find an extra floor or section of my house. "Oh, of course, *that's* where the rest of it is!" There's no associated anxiety, just relief: it's a wholly good thing. There's nothing I need to do, and it's just so nice to have finally worked out how to get into those other rooms, when I'm so short of space in the rest of the house. Plus, now the house makes sense!
It's never occurred to me to see those dreams as anything other than wish-fulfilment. The kind of house I can afford as a single adult in 21st-century England is considerably smaller than the kind of house I grew up in in the 1980s, which means I'm living in something smaller than I think (deep down) a house is supposed to be.
posted by ManyLeggedCreature at 2:53 AM on January 14, 2022 [1 favorite]
It's never occurred to me to see those dreams as anything other than wish-fulfilment. The kind of house I can afford as a single adult in 21st-century England is considerably smaller than the kind of house I grew up in in the 1980s, which means I'm living in something smaller than I think (deep down) a house is supposed to be.
posted by ManyLeggedCreature at 2:53 AM on January 14, 2022 [1 favorite]
I worked (and spent time as a millennial) in a mall for my childhood/teen years. I constantly have mall-located dreams. Working in a mall, being lost in a mall, etc. That and being back at college, trying to find a classroom, getting food in the cafeteria and not being able to find what I want. I also have video game dreams if I play a lot of a certain one. Tomb Raider lately. We just bought a house so now I have decorating/ home reno dreams.
I've always had vivid dreams and anxiety. It fluctuates with my chronic health issues. Our dreams are just often familiar things and familiar worries and our brains just sorting it out. I don't see deeper meaning beyond the obvious, and studies have shown that what you are exposed to a lot in life / during the day will heavily influence your dreams. (See: the Dreams episode of RadioLab.)
posted by Crystalinne at 3:19 AM on January 14, 2022
I've always had vivid dreams and anxiety. It fluctuates with my chronic health issues. Our dreams are just often familiar things and familiar worries and our brains just sorting it out. I don't see deeper meaning beyond the obvious, and studies have shown that what you are exposed to a lot in life / during the day will heavily influence your dreams. (See: the Dreams episode of RadioLab.)
posted by Crystalinne at 3:19 AM on January 14, 2022
I have architecture dreams practically every night. Sometimes it’s homes, sometimes it’s big sprawling malls, sometimes it’s elaborate schools. Usually there is a feeling of having been there before and forgotten how to get to wherever I want to get from where I currently am.
For a while in my twenties I had these bizarre escalator hybrid dreams, with big escherian escalator networks that branched and combined and turned from moving walkways to steep inclines and back again. I think those pulled from my experiences in the metro in both DC and Paris, and the underground malls in big cities all over.
The home based dreams often are combined with transport between them and some kind of school space, which is an obvious sorting of old memories to me. The school dreams are usually a combination of run of the mill academic stress dreams (“I haven’t attended this math class all year and I have an essay final for it due tomorrow!!”) and wandering spaces full of hallways and lockers and exits and lots of art rooms, with that particular art room smell of the pink soap and the veneered worktops. I often have to find a particular teacher who is never where they are supposed to be, which leads me to explore a bunch of hallways and rooms and offices and stairs.
The home dreams are the most variable. I’ve got a lot of stuff in my brain about partial floors, secret hatches, open balconies that overlook living spaces, lots of complicated bathrooms, and windows that never quite show a clear view anywhere. I definitely tend towards upward travel through these dream spaces. I had a recurring dream for a while about my grandparents’ house which had a cool catwalk thing in real life with a library space along it that was my preferred hiding spot as a little kid, but in my dream it was always like, oh hey secret passageway to undiscovered part of the house and also… entirely different planet?? right around the corner from the bookshelves. You might be unsurprised to learn I was obsessed with Narnia for a while. These days my home dreams are more often about houses falling apart or needing to be cleaned or having roommates I don’t want to have, but sometimes still about exploring sprawling interior spaces with multiple hot tubs and library wings and secret garden spaces and whatnot.
When I saw Adolescence of Utena it was one of the first times the surreal architecture of my dream spaces was presented in real life. I went bonkers for it and tried to show everyone I knew, but most people won’t let a teenager make them watch an anime VHS about pink haired magical girls overcoming cycles of abuse via duels and car transformations in a boarding school. Those fools.
posted by Mizu at 5:14 AM on January 14, 2022 [1 favorite]
For a while in my twenties I had these bizarre escalator hybrid dreams, with big escherian escalator networks that branched and combined and turned from moving walkways to steep inclines and back again. I think those pulled from my experiences in the metro in both DC and Paris, and the underground malls in big cities all over.
The home based dreams often are combined with transport between them and some kind of school space, which is an obvious sorting of old memories to me. The school dreams are usually a combination of run of the mill academic stress dreams (“I haven’t attended this math class all year and I have an essay final for it due tomorrow!!”) and wandering spaces full of hallways and lockers and exits and lots of art rooms, with that particular art room smell of the pink soap and the veneered worktops. I often have to find a particular teacher who is never where they are supposed to be, which leads me to explore a bunch of hallways and rooms and offices and stairs.
The home dreams are the most variable. I’ve got a lot of stuff in my brain about partial floors, secret hatches, open balconies that overlook living spaces, lots of complicated bathrooms, and windows that never quite show a clear view anywhere. I definitely tend towards upward travel through these dream spaces. I had a recurring dream for a while about my grandparents’ house which had a cool catwalk thing in real life with a library space along it that was my preferred hiding spot as a little kid, but in my dream it was always like, oh hey secret passageway to undiscovered part of the house and also… entirely different planet?? right around the corner from the bookshelves. You might be unsurprised to learn I was obsessed with Narnia for a while. These days my home dreams are more often about houses falling apart or needing to be cleaned or having roommates I don’t want to have, but sometimes still about exploring sprawling interior spaces with multiple hot tubs and library wings and secret garden spaces and whatnot.
When I saw Adolescence of Utena it was one of the first times the surreal architecture of my dream spaces was presented in real life. I went bonkers for it and tried to show everyone I knew, but most people won’t let a teenager make them watch an anime VHS about pink haired magical girls overcoming cycles of abuse via duels and car transformations in a boarding school. Those fools.
posted by Mizu at 5:14 AM on January 14, 2022 [1 favorite]
A variation on the "rooms I forgot about" trope: In real life I moved from a tiny condo to a house. For at least 10 years afterward, I dreamt that I'd forgotten to sell the condo, and it had been sitting empty. In addition, in the dream I discovered a bunch of additional rooms I hadn't known about.
posted by Mr.Know-it-some at 6:09 AM on January 14, 2022
posted by Mr.Know-it-some at 6:09 AM on January 14, 2022
Wow! Yes, I have exactly that kind of dream, except for me it's always an apartment that has extra rooms I discover and think I just forgot about, because even when I'm dreaming I can't imagine being rich enough to own property.
posted by pangolin party at 8:01 AM on January 14, 2022
posted by pangolin party at 8:01 AM on January 14, 2022
I have these dreams a lot. They are usually about a place I used to live in my dreams but not in real life. The rooms I find are usually bigger than physically possible given the size of the house.
posted by beyond_pink at 8:40 AM on January 14, 2022
posted by beyond_pink at 8:40 AM on January 14, 2022
I did not know these dreams are common. I have them fairly regularly, and both the "it's just a house" theory and the "it's an undiscovered part of yourself theory" seem plausible to my own understanding of them. My parents were exceedingly house proud—I grew up in a unique house—so I grew up with this idea that having a big house that didn't look like anybody else's was important and made you special. I'm also a minimalist who has been living for decades with a clutterer/borderline hoarder (in a very small, ordinary house). So houses are a place that hold a lot of my anxiety. Even when I'm just out and about, I'll catch myself looking at houses, thinking about whether I like them, feeling that they're better/neater than mine, in a way I simply don't about, say, cars, because I don't care at all about cars and have no ego invested at all in the car I drive, so I think that's what drives mine, but a friend told me he had a lot of those dreams when he his trans identity was emerging.
I was having a lot of "I have to pee" dreams last year. The bathroom was always filthy, or had an incredibly long line, or weird toilets that I couldn't figure out how to use. I would always wake up really needing to pee.
Then one night I dreamed I had to pee, and I found a toilet, and I lifted the lid and it was clean and empty. I was just lucid-dreaming enough to think, "That's odd," as I sat down to pee, and a moment later I woke up wetting the bed. Fortunately, I (and my partner) were both more amused than troubled by this. I hope in the future a clean toilet will immediately signal me that I'm dreaming, leading me to wake up and use the bathroom. But I've stopped having those dreams lately, I'm not sure why.
posted by Well I never at 9:13 AM on January 14, 2022
I was having a lot of "I have to pee" dreams last year. The bathroom was always filthy, or had an incredibly long line, or weird toilets that I couldn't figure out how to use. I would always wake up really needing to pee.
Then one night I dreamed I had to pee, and I found a toilet, and I lifted the lid and it was clean and empty. I was just lucid-dreaming enough to think, "That's odd," as I sat down to pee, and a moment later I woke up wetting the bed. Fortunately, I (and my partner) were both more amused than troubled by this. I hope in the future a clean toilet will immediately signal me that I'm dreaming, leading me to wake up and use the bathroom. But I've stopped having those dreams lately, I'm not sure why.
posted by Well I never at 9:13 AM on January 14, 2022
Another one who has (recently) dreamt that A LOT! It’s vaguely stressful to me as my home in waking life is badly disorganised and in the dream this presents both an opportunity and an obligation. I’ve also been having wild dreams about crazy hotels and spas and so on, especially one where the spa was all underwater, like a big aquarium with seaweed and warm springs and bubble areas and stuff.
Fwiw I have never in my life dreamt about taking an exam.
posted by J.R. Hartley at 9:48 AM on January 14, 2022 [1 favorite]
Fwiw I have never in my life dreamt about taking an exam.
posted by J.R. Hartley at 9:48 AM on January 14, 2022 [1 favorite]
Maybe thanks to this thread, I had another surprise room dream. Inception! I dreamt that my husband and I bought a new home, not a detached house but semi-detached. It was fully finished and newly renovated when we moved in, all modern and stylish looking to my delight. Then one day while in the ground floor bathroom, I noticed a gap in one of the walls. And suddenly the cute wallpaper was revealed to be a sloppy decoupage collage. Peering through the gap, I found a whole other room. I pushed against the wall, now just a piece of flimsy plywood that had been papered into place, and looked around. I was a little bit excited as maybe we could use this space to expose the bathroom, but also apprehensive as we didn’t know if the space actually belonged to us, and if now, who it belonged to and how they would be using it. Plus it was dingy and dirty. After the discovery of the secret room, I began noticing all the signs of age and decay in the home, and it was no longer the brightly lit, shiny new place I thought we had. It’s almost like the secret room infected the rest of the house upon its discovery.
Still in dreamland I woke up in our actual home, only to find the walls started to crack as if the house was about to split in half and crumble. That was scary, and in my dream I screamed, took out my phone to record what was happening, and panicked about calling my husband or 911. It was the most vivid dream I’ve had in a long time.
posted by keep it under cover at 3:40 PM on January 14, 2022
Still in dreamland I woke up in our actual home, only to find the walls started to crack as if the house was about to split in half and crumble. That was scary, and in my dream I screamed, took out my phone to record what was happening, and panicked about calling my husband or 911. It was the most vivid dream I’ve had in a long time.
posted by keep it under cover at 3:40 PM on January 14, 2022
I talked about this very sort of thing some time ago in a discussion about liminal spaces - link here. I am always dreaming about places, especially our old house and its environs. The unexpected rooms, the different and unsecured garden boundaries (anxiety about the place we lived in I suspect), the slightly changed views out of the front bedroom windows.
posted by Martha My Dear Prudence at 3:50 PM on January 14, 2022
posted by Martha My Dear Prudence at 3:50 PM on January 14, 2022
I frequently dream about discovering new secret areas at home (either a weird fantasy version of a real place I have lived, or a completely fictional one).
Sometimes they have cool stuff in them (not valuable items; more like interesting vintage fittings), but usually they're just hidden empty rooms and my dream self calculates how many extra bookcases can fit in them.
(I spent a lot of my life living in rooms and/or flats which were slightly too small to keep all my stuff in without playing furniture tetris, so this is 100% understandable to me.)
posted by confluency at 6:02 PM on January 14, 2022
Sometimes they have cool stuff in them (not valuable items; more like interesting vintage fittings), but usually they're just hidden empty rooms and my dream self calculates how many extra bookcases can fit in them.
(I spent a lot of my life living in rooms and/or flats which were slightly too small to keep all my stuff in without playing furniture tetris, so this is 100% understandable to me.)
posted by confluency at 6:02 PM on January 14, 2022
Best answer: Oh, and the "I have to pee but there's something terribly wrong with every single toilet" dreams are super common for me too. The funniest one that I can specifically remember ended with me successfully shitting in a grand piano. This made perfect sense in the dream, and fortunately didn't translate to anything in real life.
posted by confluency at 6:06 PM on January 14, 2022 [3 favorites]
posted by confluency at 6:06 PM on January 14, 2022 [3 favorites]
I have the "discover new rooms in my house" dream and also a "realize that I own an additional house" dream. The former has a feeling of positive excitement and surprise, along with an undercurrent of worry about how I could possibly have not know about rooms in my own house. The latter is sheer anxiety - how can I possibly afford to pay for multiple houses?
posted by lumpy at 10:56 AM on January 15, 2022
posted by lumpy at 10:56 AM on January 15, 2022
Oh- I have the nightmare bathroom dreams sometimes too! Often an outdated elementary school or some other kind of institutional-style bathroom, absolutely filthy, toilets overflowing (I'm a germophobe so this is horrible), doors falling apart, zero privacy, and often I'm hyperaware that someone is aggressively searching for me nearby and wanting to start a conflict with me, while I'm desperately trying to hide and poop without contracting a disease. Just the worst! Jesus even writing it out... what is happening in my poor little subconscious!
posted by nouvelle-personne at 9:21 AM on January 16, 2022
posted by nouvelle-personne at 9:21 AM on January 16, 2022
Response by poster: Only one answer met my high standards, and has been 'marked as best answer'.
(Just kidding - all answers were great, but only one was about poop, so of course I had to mark it as best).
Thank you all for wonderful thoughts.
"Fwiw I have never in my life dreamt about taking an exam."
I teach college and my repeating college dream is that I forgot to print out (or forgot to print enough copies of) my syllabus which these days is pretty entertaining - I'm like "brain, really? I should have to print out my syllabus even though it's an online Zoom class"? I expect my brain to do some updates soon and latch on to a different anxiety scenario.
posted by soylent00FF00 at 4:41 PM on January 16, 2022 [1 favorite]
(Just kidding - all answers were great, but only one was about poop, so of course I had to mark it as best).
Thank you all for wonderful thoughts.
"Fwiw I have never in my life dreamt about taking an exam."
I teach college and my repeating college dream is that I forgot to print out (or forgot to print enough copies of) my syllabus which these days is pretty entertaining - I'm like "brain, really? I should have to print out my syllabus even though it's an online Zoom class"? I expect my brain to do some updates soon and latch on to a different anxiety scenario.
posted by soylent00FF00 at 4:41 PM on January 16, 2022 [1 favorite]
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This is a recurring aspect of my dreams "Oh hey forgot this hallway was here" For me, I think because i have a lot of sleep anxiety, my dreams are often about mucking about in these houses (usually a version of one of the houses I've spent the most time in, either mom's or dad's) trying to find a place to sleep and there's often some reason the place is both good and ungood and I have to make my peace with that.
I also sometimes have bathroom dreams (I have no particular bathroom issues) which I assume are some sort of "I have to pee in RL" dreams and there's often some weird locker room bathroom which is kind of a mess that I have to figure out how to get some privacy so I can pee. The first set of dreams makes absolute sense to me, the second are usually confusing.
posted by jessamyn at 5:52 PM on January 13, 2022 [9 favorites]