A very disgusting question regarding a putrid theoretical dinner

September 28, 2021 8:14 AM

Biologists/virologists/science types: If one were able to collect MANY MANY MANY individual particles of the novel coronavirus, and one were to, well, bake them in a pan, what would it be like?

Mr. Millipede and I were discussing covid, as people do, and after all this time, this is where the discussion went. Oh no. We imagine it would be some sort of fetid protein glop. Would it? Basically, what would a cooked virus like? NO WE DO NOT PLAN ON TRYING THIS.

posted by millipede to Science & Nature (9 answers total)

I don’t know what such a cake would taste like. I do know that a biophysicist friend did an estimate of the volume of all the coronavirus in the world, all put together. He estimated that it would be about one teaspoon.

So, if you put all the coronavirus into a cake, (thus ridding the rest of the world of it, good job!), it wouldn’t affect it much more than, say, the vanilla. Or the salt.
posted by wyzewoman at 8:31 AM on September 28, 2021 [13 favorites]

https://www.reddit.com/r/askscience/comments/374r6a/what_would_a_cup_full_of_viruses_or_bacteria_look/

I found this enlightening discussion. From inside it: https://imgur.com/gallery/3e7cwZX/new

From another source: "This increases the total gathered volume of SARS-CoV-2 particles to about 160ml – easily small enough to fit inside about six shot glasses. "
posted by bbqturtle at 8:31 AM on September 28, 2021 [3 favorites]

So, the spike protein on the outside of the capsid is glycosylated, meaning it has sugars all over the outside of it. I have no idea if our bodies find those sugars to taste sweet like we do sucrose/fructose/etc. But, maybe sweet :)
posted by lab.beetle at 8:48 AM on September 28, 2021

This paper concludes:

In order to kill COVID‐19, heat virus‐containing objects for:
3 minutes at temperature above 75°C (160°F).
5 minutes for temperatures above 65°C (149°F).
20 minutes for temperatures above 60°C (140°F).

A "low heat" setting on stove seems to produce a pan temperature of about 200F (according to various food blogs), so you would probably have to be very careful about not overcooking your COVID.
posted by Transmissions From Vrillon at 9:15 AM on September 28, 2021 [6 favorites]

so you would probably have to be very careful about not overcooking your COVID

On the other hand, denatured protein glop may have greater available nutrients for human consumption than whole covid viruses with intact membranes around their RNA.
posted by MiraK at 10:14 AM on September 28, 2021 [2 favorites]

I guess sous vide is the way to go to prepare your three shot glasses of COVID matter.
posted by Namlit at 11:32 AM on September 28, 2021 [2 favorites]

Most of the envelope of an enveloped virus particle is made up of lipids — fat molecules. A virus particle is very small, so surface area is close to the volume of its constituents.

If you baked lots and lots and lots of these particles, you'd end up with an oily mess, mostly. Salted with a handful of denatured proteins and a bunch of ribonucleotides. RNA is pretty fragile even at room temperature, and proteins will start to "cook" or denature above 105F.

At scale, I'd picture dining on a melted pack of butter, hinted with the smoky ambiance of burnt egg whites.
posted by They sucked his brains out! at 12:39 PM on September 28, 2021 [7 favorites]

Obliquely relevant xkcd (I found it linked in the reddit thread)
posted by polecat at 4:29 PM on September 29, 2021 [3 favorites]

There's an interesting article here on mRNA vaccine manufacturing. While the mRNA in a vaccine is not the same genetic material found in a coronavirus particle, what was interesting to me was the cost per kilogram. The article estimates that eight billion doses would cost $23 billion and require 842.1 kg of mRNA.

Infected humans can make coronavirus for free, of course, but if you wanted to get, say, 100 g of off-the-shelf, industrial-grade virus-like material to bake with — basically, nucleic acids sitting in a blob of fatty soap-like molecules — it would cost you approximately $23,700 per gram of purified ingredient. That may make for one expensive cake!
posted by They sucked his brains out! at 10:59 AM on October 4, 2021