All-in-one guide to the regulatory environment for baby-making in NYC?
January 12, 2019 11:57 AM
By "regulatory environment" I mean not the biological, social, or moral aspects of reproduction, but what programs, policies, and laws are relevant to child-rearing in NYC? A random sampling of things I've researched on my own recently: 529 plans; NY state Paid Family Leave; NYC universal pre-K, mandatory kindergarten, and first grade age cutoff; postpartum depression screening; kindergarten gifted-and-talented program. None of this is obscure stuff, but I had to think to look for it. There's a real unknown-unknown problem here. Is there anybody that has collected this information for me?
In case the demographic information is useful: We're a heterosexual mixed-race couple with cushy FLSA-exempt office jobs. We're hoping for 3-4 children, if we can afford it. Our families have historically done well with mainstream public school followed by undergraduate degrees in the hard sciences; plan A (ha!) is at least to give our children the opportunity to follow that path. We're interested in Chinese-language education for our children.
One thing I'm already discovering is that a lot of things are set up to be much more convenient if one of us can make calls and go places in the middle of the day (and you won't be surprised which one people mostly expect). I'm not absolutely opposed to that arrangement if it turns out to be significantly advantageous, but I'd strongly prefer to keep both of us in the workforce and to share the child-rearing more evenly if we can afford to do that.
In case the demographic information is useful: We're a heterosexual mixed-race couple with cushy FLSA-exempt office jobs. We're hoping for 3-4 children, if we can afford it. Our families have historically done well with mainstream public school followed by undergraduate degrees in the hard sciences; plan A (ha!) is at least to give our children the opportunity to follow that path. We're interested in Chinese-language education for our children.
One thing I'm already discovering is that a lot of things are set up to be much more convenient if one of us can make calls and go places in the middle of the day (and you won't be surprised which one people mostly expect). I'm not absolutely opposed to that arrangement if it turns out to be significantly advantageous, but I'd strongly prefer to keep both of us in the workforce and to share the child-rearing more evenly if we can afford to do that.
I don't know that there's anywhere this is neatly organized. A few things you'll want to think about, though, particularly with multiple kids -
What neighborhood do you plan to live in? What are the daycare/nanny options if you will both be working? What do they cost and (for daycares) when do you have to be on the wait list?
What are the school options in the zone/district in your neighborhood? Many kids go out of zone/district but you have to find a place that has space after those priority zoned kids are taken care of, and that's unlikely for popular schools. If one of your kids got into a G&T at a different school, would you have the means to do two drop offs? While you will be able to secure bussing for a local G&T, you often can't with citywide programs if you are in a different borough.
How will your apartment accommodate the space for 3-4 children and their toys? Do you have access to storage so you can keep hand me down items for the next child?
How will you handle the logistics of their activities as they get older? Getting one kid across town is tough on its own - what if the activities for the kids are spread out? This is part of why you rarely see larger families in the city beyond parents who are very wealthy.
I would recommend finding Facebook based parent groups for your neighborhood. They have invaluable information and in my neighborhood at least there is a lot about schools, free or cheap used baby gear and parents organizing social meetups.
posted by decathexis at 4:55 PM on January 12, 2019
What neighborhood do you plan to live in? What are the daycare/nanny options if you will both be working? What do they cost and (for daycares) when do you have to be on the wait list?
What are the school options in the zone/district in your neighborhood? Many kids go out of zone/district but you have to find a place that has space after those priority zoned kids are taken care of, and that's unlikely for popular schools. If one of your kids got into a G&T at a different school, would you have the means to do two drop offs? While you will be able to secure bussing for a local G&T, you often can't with citywide programs if you are in a different borough.
How will your apartment accommodate the space for 3-4 children and their toys? Do you have access to storage so you can keep hand me down items for the next child?
How will you handle the logistics of their activities as they get older? Getting one kid across town is tough on its own - what if the activities for the kids are spread out? This is part of why you rarely see larger families in the city beyond parents who are very wealthy.
I would recommend finding Facebook based parent groups for your neighborhood. They have invaluable information and in my neighborhood at least there is a lot about schools, free or cheap used baby gear and parents organizing social meetups.
posted by decathexis at 4:55 PM on January 12, 2019
You'll definitely want to check out the parenting FB or NextDoor groups for your neighborhood, which will have all the neighborhood-specific stuff. I liked Park Slope Parents [I lived in Manhattan] for more NYC-general stuff, and they also have some articles on various things like nanny contracts, timelines for planning school applications (even preschool applications often start 9-10 months ahead).
If you're planning to get a nanny, you'll probably want to check out the guidelines at the Department of Taxation and Finance in order to pay him/her legally. Park Slope Parents also has a good intro guide, but it's not comprehensive.
posted by The Elusive Architeuthis at 9:56 PM on January 12, 2019
If you're planning to get a nanny, you'll probably want to check out the guidelines at the Department of Taxation and Finance in order to pay him/her legally. Park Slope Parents also has a good intro guide, but it's not comprehensive.
posted by The Elusive Architeuthis at 9:56 PM on January 12, 2019
Most people figure this stuff out thorough a combination of social groups, parents groups, nursery schools/primary schools and their
pediatricians. Once the kids are doing anything formal - even just at Appleseeds or something you are kind of in the flow. There are also lots of very active parents groups. I'm sure there's one where you live. (PSP is the biggest, and their Nanny survey essentially sets the market)
Honestly there are so many different services, programs and offerings for kids in NYC that to try to assemble one gigantic list would be a really daunting task. We tend to figure stuff out on as needed basis.
posted by JPD at 4:36 AM on January 13, 2019
pediatricians. Once the kids are doing anything formal - even just at Appleseeds or something you are kind of in the flow. There are also lots of very active parents groups. I'm sure there's one where you live. (PSP is the biggest, and their Nanny survey essentially sets the market)
Honestly there are so many different services, programs and offerings for kids in NYC that to try to assemble one gigantic list would be a really daunting task. We tend to figure stuff out on as needed basis.
posted by JPD at 4:36 AM on January 13, 2019
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Healthy Start (Which is a federal program administered by state (or local, I forget))
New York Foundling
I’d link but I’m on my phone.
posted by bilabial at 12:50 PM on January 12, 2019