Getting information to the doctor

March 3, 2018 8:12 AM

My elderly father refuses to let anyone accompany him to the doctor and we’re concerned that he’s minimizing some increasingly serious symptoms at his appointments. What’s the most effective way for us to inform his doctor about the difficulties he’s been having?

(We realize the doctor can’t tell us anything or even confirm that he’s a patient - we just want to tell the doctor what’s going on.)

posted by Blue Jello Elf to Health & Fitness (7 answers total)

If it were me, I'd write and mail a letter, which could then be part of his chart (which would mean he'd have legal access to it if he requested, so be aware of that possibility).
posted by lazuli at 8:27 AM on March 3, 2018

I have had relatives with mental health issue who I have had to talk to their doctor about some issues (this was with permission, but not written permission) and basically, you can talk to someone's doctor- the doctor just can not talk to you directly about the patient without written consent. I also imagine that if the doctor is part of a hospital practice that there would be a department that can help you navigate this- this is not an uncommon issue with families and patients.
posted by momochan at 9:00 AM on March 3, 2018

Yes, you can relay concerns to the provider but they can't share information with you (if you're in the states, this is due to HIPAA). Just call/write and let them know you're aware they can't tell you anything but you would like to relay your concerns. If there are immediate safety concerns (e.g., seizures which would make driving unsafe), you may be able to contact the police. There may also be elder care advocates and/or social work within your father's healthcare sphere (clinic/hospital).
posted by stillmoving at 9:58 AM on March 3, 2018

Fyi, I think that the doctor generally is able to confirm that your father is a patient, unless the doctor's specialty would confirm what your father is being treated for. For example, a psychiatrist who specializes in substance abuse might not be allowed to disclose that your father is a patient. But a primary care doctor would not have to withhold the simple fact of the doctor-patient relationship.

Maybe that is not a big deal in the context of your question, but it makes it more simple -- you and the doctor don't have to play word games, pretending that you both don't know that your father is a patient.
posted by merejane at 12:25 PM on March 3, 2018

"I can neither confirm nor deny that [name] is now, or has ever been, a patient of this facility." That's standard boilerplate for substance abuse and mental health in general; I am not as familiar with medical/surgical facility.

As stillmoving says, the provider can listen to what you have to say but may not provide any information about the patient unless the patient has explicitly given permission for staff to contact you.
posted by catlet at 4:04 PM on March 3, 2018

It really makes sense to send something physical, a letter, so that the doctor might ask the pt in person about the things in the letter. (It would be hard to get him on the phone, and it's also pretty likely that someone else would receive the VM, if you leave one. Things might get lost in the relay.)

Note that the doctor will almost certainly mention to the pt, your father, that he received such a letter from you. Even if your father is entirely upset and contends all of the information that you've provided is wrong, that's something to talk about--his relationship to someone around him.
posted by flyingfork at 9:03 PM on March 3, 2018

I have dealt with this in the past with my mother. I just called the doctor's office, asked for Dr. ______________'s nurse, introduced myself, acknowledged that they could not give me information, and said I would like to give them information. I never spoke to the doctor. I always spoke with the nurse. I also recall one time asking the nurse to get the doctor to tell my mother it might be best if she brought someone with her to the next appointment - to write things down, remind her of important issues, etc. - and BOOM, I was in after that.
posted by eleslie at 6:46 AM on March 4, 2018