Which dating apps in Chicago skew toward the weirdos?

August 7, 2017 6:37 PM

I'm dipping my toe into the meeting people waters after a recent divorce. Which apps or sites should I try next?

I tried Tinder first but that was a hive of scum and villainy. Now I'm trying Bumble and it skews heavily Lincoln Park Chad. Not to malign these dudes, as I'm sure they are perfectly nice, but I'm plus size, tattooed, and pierced so I'm just not finding my tribe there.

I don't think Fetlife is the place -- I'm into some fetish adjacent stuff, e.g. being fine with dating someone in an open relationship (not that I think poly is a fetish!) but I'm not full bore into BDSM etc. Am I wrong? I've been told OK Cupid is not worth the time anymore. Where do the weirdos in Chicago find dates?

posted by We'll all float on okay to Computers & Internet (6 answers total)

Best answer: I'm going to suggest you give OkCupid a shot anyway -- it can't hurt and the way they match for keywords and how you set your profile means you can easily find people who are into poly, light kink, tattoos, etc.

I also hear good things about eHarmony, if you're looking for a long term thing. I have some kink-positive friends who met on it and are now married, and apparently the pro-Christian bias has been removed.
posted by ananci at 6:52 PM on August 7, 2017

Best answer: Ok Cupid is still where the weirdos hang out, from what I can tell. It also gives you the most in-depth profiles, plus there's the questions, which is where the real dirt comes out. My last round of looking for someone ended in December, and I really didn't bother with any other site; they all seem to skew normal and shallow.
posted by MexicanYenta at 7:16 PM on August 7, 2017

Best answer: This Chicago-area post-divorce tattooed pierced female weirdo found lots of dates on OkCupid. Might be regional, but the getting is good right now.
posted by juniperesque at 7:17 PM on August 7, 2017

Best answer: OKC! But cast a line on FetLife too. I know kink-adjacent weirdos who market themselves as datey types there. "Kinkster" "Evolving" or "Exploring" will net you the best response. Just be clear about your interests & expectations! Reply "maybe attending" to events so folks see your name, or post in some local groups.
posted by fritillary at 8:04 PM on August 7, 2017

Best answer: I'm on both FL and OKC and OKC is where I've met a bunch of interesting people as well as several lovers. OKC is plenty poly-friendly, too. You can indicate in your profile if you are monogamous or non-monogamous, which has been helpful for me. Good luck!
posted by Bella Donna at 10:56 AM on August 9, 2017

Response by poster: Narrator: The commenters were correct. OkCupid was full of glorious weirdos.

I'm sure I'll have a question soon to critique my profile :)
posted by We'll all float on okay at 7:54 PM on August 9, 2017 [1 favorite]