Why does my ex want to be friends but doesn't initiate contact with me?
June 21, 2016 5:16 PM Subscribe
I was dating this guy for about 6 months. We're both 23 years old. At the beginning, he was pursuing me hard and made plan to see me all the time. I found myself falling for him quickly. Then 6 months later, he called it off saying he doesn't feel enough chemistry between us. I was pretty sad although it was an amicable breakup. In hindsight, I could see it coming as he was starting to not put in much effort into the relationship and we stopped having sex. He's definitely not the type to use me for sex at all. He said he'd only be intimate in a serious relationship, which we were in one at one point.
I still enjoyed our friendship a lot when we were together. We went running, did a lot of fun stuff together, etc. so we both agreed to be friends. After the breakup, we did not talk to each other for a month, and then I was the first one to reach out. He answered my text right away and we even met up in person a few times. Our hangouts have been strictly platonic and he told me he enjoys the friendship we have. However, I realize that I've been the one who has initiated contact every single time since the breakup (4 months ago). After we hung out last time, I texted him and let him know that I enjoy spending time with him. I admitted that I still have some feelings for him. However, I know things ended for the right reason and I'm not asking to get back together. I do feel weird about being the one initiating contacts every time. He assured me that he enjoys hanging out with me too. In his words, "I absolutely would like to maintain our friendship and I really enjoy what we have right now". He also said he'd be sure to reach out to me in a couple of weeks after my final exams are over.
Well, my exams are over a week ago and since we go to the same college (not the same class), he knows that I'm free. Yet, he hasn't reached out to me at all. It's been a month since we last talked. What should I do at this point? Part of me does care about him and wants to talk to him. I'm not trying to play game here by waiting for him to text me. I just don't want to be the only one who puts effort into this friendship. As more time goes by, I'm starting to doubt that I'll ever hear from him again. Should I reach out or just let him go?
I still enjoyed our friendship a lot when we were together. We went running, did a lot of fun stuff together, etc. so we both agreed to be friends. After the breakup, we did not talk to each other for a month, and then I was the first one to reach out. He answered my text right away and we even met up in person a few times. Our hangouts have been strictly platonic and he told me he enjoys the friendship we have. However, I realize that I've been the one who has initiated contact every single time since the breakup (4 months ago). After we hung out last time, I texted him and let him know that I enjoy spending time with him. I admitted that I still have some feelings for him. However, I know things ended for the right reason and I'm not asking to get back together. I do feel weird about being the one initiating contacts every time. He assured me that he enjoys hanging out with me too. In his words, "I absolutely would like to maintain our friendship and I really enjoy what we have right now". He also said he'd be sure to reach out to me in a couple of weeks after my final exams are over.
Well, my exams are over a week ago and since we go to the same college (not the same class), he knows that I'm free. Yet, he hasn't reached out to me at all. It's been a month since we last talked. What should I do at this point? Part of me does care about him and wants to talk to him. I'm not trying to play game here by waiting for him to text me. I just don't want to be the only one who puts effort into this friendship. As more time goes by, I'm starting to doubt that I'll ever hear from him again. Should I reach out or just let him go?
This post was deleted for the following reason: Hey, this is a question you have asked in many different forms and across multiple accounts, and the answers to "why doesn't he initiate contact" aren't going to change. -- restless_nomad
« Older What are some great music theory blogs? | I don’t want to be a woman Newer »
This thread is closed to new comments.