What the hell was in that coffee?
March 14, 2016 10:44 PM Subscribe
The other day, Mrs. Wazoo (who is not new to coffee) brewed a pot of the worst coffee that's ever existed, and we're baffled and disgusted the the fallout. It started innocently enough, with a bag of coffee from Four Barrel that smelled... well, like coffee. It did not end that way. Can you help us with any ideas about what could possibly have been the cause of this awful, awful thing?
When she ground it, it smelled like burning metal. When she brewed it (figuring she was smelling the grinder's motor failing), the resulting coffee smelled like burned, rancid peanut butter mixed with death. Now, days later, its residue is still detectable in our coffee pot, cups, thermoses, etc, despite multiple scrubs and vinegar brews. I ran cleaning pellets through the grinder, tossed the coffee and have scrubbed everything multiple times and the smell is almost gone. We've made coffee since (from another bag!) that's been just fine, and our process is completely regimented (down to the gram), so I don't think it's anything we did.
Our best theory to date is that we got some beans that had been roasted nigh unto charcoal (from not cleaning out the roaster), but we've not roasted so that's a guess. Has anyone done that? Has anyone experienced this? The smell. Oh god, the smell. it lingers so terrible
When she ground it, it smelled like burning metal. When she brewed it (figuring she was smelling the grinder's motor failing), the resulting coffee smelled like burned, rancid peanut butter mixed with death. Now, days later, its residue is still detectable in our coffee pot, cups, thermoses, etc, despite multiple scrubs and vinegar brews. I ran cleaning pellets through the grinder, tossed the coffee and have scrubbed everything multiple times and the smell is almost gone. We've made coffee since (from another bag!) that's been just fine, and our process is completely regimented (down to the gram), so I don't think it's anything we did.
Our best theory to date is that we got some beans that had been roasted nigh unto charcoal (from not cleaning out the roaster), but we've not roasted so that's a guess. Has anyone done that? Has anyone experienced this? The smell. Oh god, the smell. it lingers so terrible
Response by poster: Oh, that bag is long gone. The offensive smell is definitely organic.
posted by TheNewWazoo at 10:58 PM on March 14, 2016
posted by TheNewWazoo at 10:58 PM on March 14, 2016
Mold in the machine or on the beans is bitter. However...
Wait. First I want to apologize in advance and put a *Trigger Warning* for anyone squeamish!!
The hell you describe sounds a bit like charred protein - animal droppings, maybe insects, or mouse parts? Gosh, I'm so sorry to even suggest it!
My gas stove is AWESOME. Sadly, it also has a setting so low you can't see the flame. More than once I thought the burner was off and have burned either seafood or turkey carcass in stock SO badly... The smell. Oh, the smell. This is why there are fire remediation services. I'm serious.
Once. My friend's mom forgot two sausage links on the stove and the smell was SO AWFUL and permeated EVERYTHING, they had to redo the kitchen, especially removing the wallpaper which was like a sponge.
And yet, I can't quite square this with your procedure. I will say re-constituting burned protein volatile compounds maybe might do this? My cabinets and everything in them stank faintly for about 1.5 years after the Turkey Incident.
I can't quite see this with coffee, but that's my best guess.
I did laugh my ass off reading your question. Glad you have a sense of humor! In short, nothing smells like burnt protein, so that's my guess. Coffee is used to cleanse the nose/palate - so maybe it hid the culprit just enough in the bag before brewing?
I'm so so sorry for suggesting this. As a former professional chef and current culinary professional, this is the only thing that smells that badly and sticks to everything that I know of which is organic - mold, insect, animal. Beans are sometimes roasted in really big drums. They travel long distances before roasting. Things happen.
So sorry.
posted by jbenben at 11:19 PM on March 14, 2016 [6 favorites]
Wait. First I want to apologize in advance and put a *Trigger Warning* for anyone squeamish!!
The hell you describe sounds a bit like charred protein - animal droppings, maybe insects, or mouse parts? Gosh, I'm so sorry to even suggest it!
My gas stove is AWESOME. Sadly, it also has a setting so low you can't see the flame. More than once I thought the burner was off and have burned either seafood or turkey carcass in stock SO badly... The smell. Oh, the smell. This is why there are fire remediation services. I'm serious.
Once. My friend's mom forgot two sausage links on the stove and the smell was SO AWFUL and permeated EVERYTHING, they had to redo the kitchen, especially removing the wallpaper which was like a sponge.
And yet, I can't quite square this with your procedure. I will say re-constituting burned protein volatile compounds maybe might do this? My cabinets and everything in them stank faintly for about 1.5 years after the Turkey Incident.
I can't quite see this with coffee, but that's my best guess.
I did laugh my ass off reading your question. Glad you have a sense of humor! In short, nothing smells like burnt protein, so that's my guess. Coffee is used to cleanse the nose/palate - so maybe it hid the culprit just enough in the bag before brewing?
I'm so so sorry for suggesting this. As a former professional chef and current culinary professional, this is the only thing that smells that badly and sticks to everything that I know of which is organic - mold, insect, animal. Beans are sometimes roasted in really big drums. They travel long distances before roasting. Things happen.
So sorry.
posted by jbenben at 11:19 PM on March 14, 2016 [6 favorites]
Best answer: Welcome to the wonderful world of coffee defects! Coffee defects can happen because of insect damage, mold, fungus or bacteria, poor harvesting practices, dirty equipment, processing issues, or other problems. Specialty coffee (like Four Barrel) is sorted rigorously to eliminate any defects, however -- it's a big world and there are a lot of beans and even one defective bean can foul the cup. Some coffee defects are relatively mild (maybe causing a faint aroma of potato or a flat lack of flavor), but some of them can be as bad as you describe. I'm not sure which one you encountered, but here's an article that includes a chart how describing each defect tastes (short answer: gross!). Here's a picture of how the defects look prior to roasting.
If you contact Four Barrel and let them know, I'm almost certain they'd give you a refund and an apology.
posted by ourobouros at 4:26 AM on March 15, 2016 [30 favorites]
If you contact Four Barrel and let them know, I'm almost certain they'd give you a refund and an apology.
posted by ourobouros at 4:26 AM on March 15, 2016 [30 favorites]
Seconding ourobouros! Before I even clicked through I was thinking potato defect, though it sounds like something else. Sometimes, coffee just....has problems.
posted by kalimac at 5:24 AM on March 15, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by kalimac at 5:24 AM on March 15, 2016 [1 favorite]
Definitely contact Four Barrel: they'd be glad to know for future reference, and if this is something that was showed up across a whole batch, they might be able to identify it more precisely.
posted by holgate at 6:04 AM on March 15, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by holgate at 6:04 AM on March 15, 2016 [2 favorites]
Response by poster: ourobouros, that's awesome! I figured there must be something like that, and there it is!
I may well contact them; I'm not looking for an apology or recompense or anything else, really. Coffee is organic and organic things happen!
posted by TheNewWazoo at 8:24 AM on March 15, 2016
I may well contact them; I'm not looking for an apology or recompense or anything else, really. Coffee is organic and organic things happen!
posted by TheNewWazoo at 8:24 AM on March 15, 2016
Best answer: Yup, most probably potato defect. Especially if the coffee was from East Africa (and it was probably Rwanda or Burundi? They have higher rates of potato defect going on) The trouble with potato defect is that a single, lone bean in an entire batch of roasted coffee can cause what you just described. Its horrible for roasters because you can't really tell until the coffee is ground that the defect is present. So even if you cup out the batch you roasted and taste it, you might not land on that single bean that causes that abhorrent aroma. I've personally seen really high score lots of coffee coming out of east africa that taste awesome, roast beautifully, and just one. single. batch. has a single potato defect bean in it. Its such a bummer.
They would certainly like to know that this is going on, and they're totally going to spot you a bag or two for free.
To nuke the smell in your gear, you should really get some Purocaffe (and if you're local to 4Barrel, ask them for a hit of it to clean your stuff with, their coffee bars all use it). You don't have to have a full bottle of it, you probably just need a couple tablespoons.
posted by furnace.heart at 9:05 AM on March 15, 2016 [5 favorites]
They would certainly like to know that this is going on, and they're totally going to spot you a bag or two for free.
To nuke the smell in your gear, you should really get some Purocaffe (and if you're local to 4Barrel, ask them for a hit of it to clean your stuff with, their coffee bars all use it). You don't have to have a full bottle of it, you probably just need a couple tablespoons.
posted by furnace.heart at 9:05 AM on March 15, 2016 [5 favorites]
Response by poster: I found the bag, and it's a Bourbón (my favorite varietal) from Rwanda, no less. I shot 4B an email as a heads-up. Thanks, all for the input! I can't get the smell out of my nightmares, but at least I know what to do to the people I hate the most in the world.
posted by TheNewWazoo at 8:58 PM on March 15, 2016
posted by TheNewWazoo at 8:58 PM on March 15, 2016
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by AppleTurnover at 10:56 PM on March 14, 2016 [1 favorite]