Mr. Clemens vs. the Semi-colon.
September 11, 2013 1:12 AM

I could swear I read a quote once, attributed to Samuel Clemens/Mark Twain about how much he hates semi-colons. I can't find it anymore. I found one by Vonnegut, but I really wanted the one by Twain (if there even is one).
posted by From Bklyn to Writing & Language (6 answers total) 3 users marked this as a favorite
Could it be you're thinking of this quote, in which Twain famously uses a colon and a semicolon?

"Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond; cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education."
posted by Specklet at 1:33 AM on September 11, 2013


I'm a little dubious he would have made such a statement, since I'm pretty sure he was actually quite fond of them ...

Checking a random book of his from the Gutenberg Project, there are four semicolons in the first *paragraph* of Innocents Abroad, for example. And they are sprinkled quite liberally throughout the rest of the text; this little bit contains six, for example:

"Oh, everything. Latitude and longitude, noon every day; and how many miles we made last twenty-four hours; and all the domino games I beat and horse billiards; and whales and sharks and porpoises; and the text of the sermon Sundays (because that'll tell at home, you know); and the ships we saluted and what nation they were; and which way the wind was, and whether there was a heavy sea, and what sail we carried ..."

So, I don't think Twain really had any hatred for the semicolon.
posted by kyrademon at 3:42 AM on September 11, 2013


I'm almost 100% certain you read the quote by Vonnegut because that's the one that everyone knows.
posted by empath at 4:45 AM on September 11, 2013


The man did use semicolons liberally, but he appears to have hated parentheses.
posted by catalytics at 5:00 AM on September 11, 2013


No one is the "beneficiary" of more misattributed quotes than Mark Twain. I suspect that you found a quote somewhere that he never actually said.
posted by Lame_username at 11:25 AM on September 11, 2013


I think it must be the Vonnegut quote. Thanks, all.
posted by From Bklyn at 4:03 AM on September 12, 2013


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