How do you do, fellow kids?

August 18, 2023 12:44 PM

Looking for slang to make my children groan.

I came across the current slang word "rizz," which is short for "charisma" it seems. I keep using it (or misusing it, rather) in conversation with my 14-year-old son. He implores me to stop.

I'm looking for other slang terms that I can pull out now and again to annoy him and my younger son (10 years old). Advice about how to use the slang slightly incorrectly would be welcome, as are terms that are already a little out of date. Dorky dad raps like "My money don't jiggle-jiggle, it folds" or other cringeworthy memes that I could use would also be appreciated.

posted by Leontine to Writing & Language (55 answers total)

Make sure to call everything "mid", even things that are not mid! (It means "of fair-to-middling quality")
posted by capricorn at 12:52 PM on August 18, 2023 [13 favorites]

Just reach back to your own childhood.

"That's so fly/dope/phat/tubular" when your kid does something awesome or you see something cool.
"You're buggin" when your kid is freaking out.
"Let's bounce" when it's time to go or go even farther back and say "let's blow this pop stand."
"Grody to the max," or "Gag me with a spoon" when you see something yucky

History is full of good stuff! Or shall I say fly.
posted by brookeb at 12:53 PM on August 18, 2023 [5 favorites]

Are you looking for (1) current slang, or (2) slang that was cool not long ago, but is now dated, or (3) ancient slang?
posted by Artifice_Eternity at 12:55 PM on August 18, 2023 [1 favorite]

Personally, the older I get, the more I enjoy using incredibly old-fashioned slang -- like, stuff from well before I was born. I feel like it's a right and obligation of us oldsters to keep archaic slang and jokes alive.
posted by Artifice_Eternity at 12:57 PM on August 18, 2023 [7 favorites]

Use "cope" as noun meaning rationalization.

For instance, if he doesn't do well on a test or school assignment, and he tells you it doesn't matter because he didn't try that hard or he doesn't care about that class anyway, tell him, "that's cope."
posted by glenngulia at 1:03 PM on August 18, 2023

I used to embarrass millenial co-workers a couple years ago by calling everything "lit". "This standup meeting is gonna be lit." "Lit" has the benefit of being highly punnable, for extra groaniness. E.g., I called a book I was reading "lit-erature". You can feel the discomfort. It's amazing.

"Drip" (meaning, roughly, "style") is a word I see on social media a lot that Olds Just Don't Get. "Check out my pleated khakis and white New Balance drip."

There's always grunge speak, which the lamestain in me still kinda wishes were real.
posted by kevinbelt at 1:04 PM on August 18, 2023 [9 favorites]

Not necessarily slang, but when my kids were that age, every time I texted them, I'd spell out words they would abbreviate and abbreviate others that one normally would not.
posted by lpsguy at 1:09 PM on August 18, 2023 [12 favorites]

"Based." It means, more or less, "controversial but correct" -- but for maximum cringe, you can misuse it as a generic positive adjective. "This coffee is based", "that new interchange they're building is pretty based", etc.
posted by mekily at 1:09 PM on August 18, 2023 [15 favorites]

My son is always saying something is "bussin'" or it "slaps/slaps hard," when he means it's really good. He gets so wound up when I say it slightly wrong, like "Wow, these burgers are really slapping hard!" Or "Wow, these burgers are bussing," emphasis on the ing. It's so hilarious.
posted by SamanthaK at 1:09 PM on August 18, 2023 [19 favorites]

Cake is slang for booty...Let them eat cake indeed.
posted by schyler523 at 1:10 PM on August 18, 2023

Anything good is "poggers," or worse yet, "poggies." Nobody uses this word sincerely, especially out loud, so be as sincere as possible, of course.

Fully replace the word enough with Kenough in your vocabulary. Also replace the word can with Ken. Any syllable that sounds even slightly like Ken is now Ken.
posted by lampoil at 1:12 PM on August 18, 2023 [8 favorites]

If they're fans of a Star War and Robot Chicken esoteria, you can bring "wizard" back.
posted by credulous at 1:15 PM on August 18, 2023 [2 favorites]

Call everything and anything "suss" (short for suspect or suspicious). My 12-year-old begs me to stop but also laughs, so...
posted by that's candlepin at 1:18 PM on August 18, 2023 [24 favorites]

"skill issue" is a newer one. Similar to but different from get good ("git gud"), it refers to needing to get better at a video game ("you couldn't complete that mission? skill issue") but is also used ironically / sarcastically for just... anything bad. The more the situation is out of anyone's control, the better, if you want the pun and irony approach.

"Bus ran late? Skill issue"

"Pop quiz was hard? Skill issue." (maybe true, for the double ironic usage!)

"School lunch was terrible today? skill issue!"
posted by Nonsteroidal Anti-Inflammatory Drug at 1:19 PM on August 18, 2023 [10 favorites]

"Fit" is short for "outfit," as I eventually learned after months of assuming my kids were referring to the way their clothes fit rather than to the clothes themselves. Lots of potential ways to get dorky with that one: "Check out the fit of this fit!" "Does this fit make me look fit?" "Your fit is lit!"
posted by Redstart at 1:22 PM on August 18, 2023 [7 favorites]

This 2023 slang list with appropriate applications is already sprouting mold (yeet) but has 'rizz' & ample distortion opportunities.

No. 17. "P"
To “be P” or “push P” means that you’re staying real and being positive. If you’re pushin’ P, you’re making moves to improve your circumstances and provide for the people around you.
Example: Keepin’ it P? Respect.
Misuse: Keepin' it "Z"
Faux-fumbling face-save: Yes, "Z", Z... as in... Zoomer.

No. 11, "cheugy," has edged out "basic" (mediocre). Misuse: basic as praise.

Though, as a sucker for succotash, I'm also a huge fan of dragging inoffensive slang out of the crypt.
posted by Iris Gambol at 1:25 PM on August 18, 2023 [1 favorite]

If someone did something really well, they “ate that.” As opposed to my youth, when “ate it” meant falling hard on your face!

“low key flex” = subtly showing off a skill or thing you’re proud of

“sus” = suspicious. Usually “yo, that’s sus.”

“cheugy” = basic , cliche, not trendy

“thirst trap” = posting a sexy or alluring photo of yourself

“vibe check” as in “you definitely pass the vibe check”

“no cap” = “I’m telling the truth” or “for real”

“canon event” a (usually difficult) experience that is foundational for someone - I could see this being used to good effect with your kid like, “help me study I have a test tomorrow!” “Maybe failing a test is a canon event?”
posted by Isingthebodyelectric at 1:27 PM on August 18, 2023 [7 favorites]

I think everything the students say in this SNL sketch with Pedro Pascal should be on your list.
posted by BlahLaLa at 1:39 PM on August 18, 2023 [5 favorites]

I feel like "You're the man now, dog" (turn your sound down, and you're gonna want to close the tab real soon) is going to be a timeless expression of clunky use of slang towards younger people. If you can do with Connery's attempt at an American accent, all the better.
posted by Sunburnt at 1:40 PM on August 18, 2023 [1 favorite]

No cap, that guy is straight sus. And that's not me just poppin off.
posted by MadMadam at 1:41 PM on August 18, 2023 [1 favorite]

Using "bloke" as if it meant "pal" or "mate" or "friend", as in "how ya goin', bloke?" gives the impression of failing hard at trying to sound Australian.

For extra cringe points, use "Foster's" as an exemplar of quality, and remark "well that really puts an extra shrimp on the barbie" whenever something has just got more complicated (this one is wrong on multiple levels).

Similarly, I have no idea why this guy thinks "happy arvo" is a thing, but it's exactly the kind of not a thing you could use.
posted by flabdablet at 1:50 PM on August 18, 2023

Even though they know I'm doing it intentionally, saying "Pokemans" absolutely sets all three of my kids off.
posted by Etrigan at 2:00 PM on August 18, 2023 [21 favorites]

Tik Tok word/meme to use:

POV: (Point of View) if you're doing an impression of him "POV: I'm a teen upset my parent is using unhinged words"

Also, unhinged. Use it liberally.

Also say "fitcheck" if you or he is checking anything in a mirror.
posted by Sweetchrysanthemum at 2:00 PM on August 18, 2023 [3 favorites]

nth-ing above: oh gawd, they hate it when you say "sus." #1 tween/teen annoyance word.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 2:06 PM on August 18, 2023

My kid plays rugby and hates it when I say "you wrecked that kid/play/catch/try" and even more so when I extend it to chores "you wrecked that bathroom"

Its so amusing.
posted by Ftsqg at 2:14 PM on August 18, 2023

My 20 year old agrees it would be hilarious if you used "skill issue" or "POV."

She has never heard anyone use the word "cheugy" in real life and she just read me something from r/GenZ where someone asked if anyone actually used that word and everyone said no, they never use it or hear anyone use it.

Poggers and yeet are really outdated and no one says them anymore, so they're good if that's what you're going for. (But I wonder if they may have hung on longer with younger kids who didn't learn them until they were already going out of style?) "Weird flex" is something I feel like my kids say all the time ("Weird flex, but okay"), but my daughter says it's years out of date and they would never say that now.

According to my daughter, "high key" is just as common as "low key." I'd swear I've never heard or read "high key" anywhere, including from my kids, but she says it's a perfectly normal thing to say, like if you really want to get some piercings you'd say you high key want to and if you're just kind of thinking about it you'd say you low key want to.
posted by Redstart at 2:18 PM on August 18, 2023 [3 favorites]

Really want to nudge you to lean into old-fashioned, early and mid 20th slang. Golly willikers and the like.

A lot of this suggestions here are AAVE or come from LGBTQ and drag communities. Kids come by vocabulary from their friends and pop culture, but if you're an adult white person, or anything but a member of those communities, using this makes it sound an awful lot like you're trying to sound Black (or queer or whatever), sometimes called used a "Blaccent." I really want to discourage you from using slang that's vocabulary from marginalized communities. I get that you're trying to be cringy, and we don't always know when language is appropriated, but when we do, it's really better to avoid it.
posted by bluedaisy at 2:23 PM on August 18, 2023 [9 favorites]

Any time they are playing any sort of video game, ask "are you playing your Nintendos?"
posted by bondcliff at 2:26 PM on August 18, 2023 [6 favorites]

I call my 11 year old daughter "bro" and that seems to make her cringe. "Suss" always works, too.
posted by tristeza at 2:29 PM on August 18, 2023 [1 favorite]

She has never heard anyone use the word "cheugy" in real life and she just read me something from r/GenZ where someone asked if anyone actually used that word and everyone said no, they never use it or hear anyone use it.

Which is exactly why OP should use it frequently.
posted by kevinbelt at 2:42 PM on August 18, 2023 [7 favorites]

80s slang my little sister would use: 'bumping' as an adjective meaning cool (or whatever the kids use for that now - is it 'sick'?)
(interesting how 'cool' never goes out of fashion)
posted by Rash at 3:21 PM on August 18, 2023

Another adjective, a favorite from Mental Floss' 14 Colonial-Era Slang Terms to Work Into Modern Conversation, and particularly useful w/r/t teenagers,

chuffy

surly or impolite

If someone is short with you, tell them they don’t have to be so chuffy. It’s a strange, old word with obscure origins, and one that sounds a bit softer than "jerk."

posted by Rash at 3:37 PM on August 18, 2023

Rizz and drip are most easily misused by authority figures. You won't even have to try to do it bad. Rizz is like game, a subtle flirty. And drip is style or good clothes. Use it any way you like, it will be terrible. I feel bad already.
posted by Iteki at 3:49 PM on August 18, 2023 [4 favorites]

The ones that make my kid the most crazy when I use them are no cap, especially with for real for real, calling things mid, telling him “oooh, get wrecked,” when I win an argument, and calling things cringe.

I also have a friend (also Gen X) who still says “It’s on like Donkey Kong” which he overheard while I was on a phone call today and based on his reaction I’m now considering adding to my repertoire.
posted by Mchelly at 4:04 PM on August 18, 2023 [4 favorites]

"Obvi" (obvee) for Obvious is always a good one, and to my kids' friends I ask "What's the hot goss?" (for hot gossip) which results in some excellent eye-rolling. A++ would recommend.
posted by nkknkk at 4:37 PM on August 18, 2023 [1 favorite]

“It’s very yeet.”
posted by mhoye at 4:39 PM on August 18, 2023 [3 favorites]

Instead of saying "I definitely agree with you" say "true dat!" which is 90's slang, and I say it to my daughter sometimes (who was born in the 80's) and it always annoys her. 😋
posted by forthright at 4:51 PM on August 18, 2023 [2 favorites]

Combine any of the above advice with "It's giving..." as carelessly and randomly as possible.

It's giving cringe
posted by secretseasons at 5:05 PM on August 18, 2023 [7 favorites]

Current slang?

"Bet," depending on your intonation, can mean, "Yeah, cool, bro" or (less often) to express dubiousness, "Yeah, sure."

Cap/No cap (lie, no lie), as in,
"And then he said he loved me."
"Cap?" (You kidding me?)
"No cap!" (I swear!)

"Ate" has replaced "Slay" in some areas. So, instead of, "Man, did you see Bey's Atlanta concert? She slayed!" they say, "Oh, she ate that!" (I've never heard them use "Eat" in present tense, though I suppose it's possible).

I actually like "suss" (which they seem to define as "suspicious" but I think of it as "suspect" (adjective).

I've also never, ever heard anyone actually use cheugy in real life. (I'm 56, but I watch way too much TikTok.)

But yeah, you could annoy them with 80s Valley Girl patois, but why not go old school with stuff from the 20s, 30s and 40s? (Watch the movie The Best Years of Our Lives and cheer (or drink) when they say something or someone is "swell.") Bee's knees. 23-skidoo!
posted by The Wrong Kind of Cheese at 5:29 PM on August 18, 2023 [1 favorite]

"I am not going to lie..."
posted by tomboko at 6:33 PM on August 18, 2023

Deadass
posted by greta simone at 9:25 PM on August 18, 2023

Dad is low key goated when teen slang is the vibe.
posted by vunder at 10:10 PM on August 18, 2023 [3 favorites]

Using "bloke" as if it meant "pal" or "mate" or "friend", as in "how ya goin', bloke?" gives the impression of failing hard at trying to sound Australian.


Sigh. I unironically say this and I am Australian.
posted by deadwax at 10:52 PM on August 18, 2023 [1 favorite]

Attractive masculine people are "snacks" or "zaddies"
posted by doift at 11:15 PM on August 18, 2023

I unironically say this and I am Australian.

Are you perhaps from the northern suburbs of Adelaide? That's the only place I've actually encountered it in the wild, and it was just this one bloke in a dodgy used car yard who kept using it that way, and all his workmates had named him "Bloke" because of it and kept giving him endless shit. Could it be a really specific regionalism?

In any case an American using it would send some quality cringe.
posted by flabdablet at 12:03 AM on August 19, 2023

in addition to “drip” and “riz” (also verbed i.e. to riz = to flirt) my own research with my 12 &14 yr olds has yielded …
“bus me that x” = “please can you pass me x” (never fails to illicit a cringe at dinner time)
“he/she is leng” = “he/she is physically attractive”

they also report that “suss” can have homophonic undertones and is best avoided
posted by tomp at 1:06 AM on August 19, 2023 [2 favorites]

I like to annoy the young people in my life by reenacting memes.
posted by The corpse in the library at 7:42 AM on August 19, 2023 [4 favorites]

Sing along like you knew the songs they've discovered from the first time they were popular.
posted by k3ninho at 1:48 PM on August 19, 2023 [2 favorites]

It’s a whole vibe. So vibey. The vibes are immaculate.
posted by vunder at 2:10 PM on August 19, 2023 [6 favorites]

"totes adorbes" meaning totally adorable, or a very fancy Catalonian brand of umbrella

You could also just quote anything Homer says in the "Homerpalooza" episode of The Simpsons
posted by credulous at 7:48 PM on August 19, 2023

Even though they know I'm doing it intentionally, saying "Pokemans" absolutely sets all three of my kids off.

Well everybody knows the plural of Pokemon is Pokemen, so I don't blame them.
posted by hydrophonic at 7:58 PM on August 19, 2023 [3 favorites]

“It’s giving…” has so many ways to go wrong and right.

So does “not me…”
posted by vunder at 9:54 PM on August 19, 2023 [1 favorite]

Saying 'on god', which means 'for real', but enunciating it very clearly and using it at the beginning of a sentence instead of at the end.

This emoji 👁️👄👁️, used anytime your child texts you (indicates staring blankly in disbelief or sometimes mild shock)
posted by ananci at 6:49 AM on August 20, 2023

Based on conversations with our dept's summer intern, any achievement or positive development merits an exclamation of "Slay!"
posted by aught at 5:08 PM on August 20, 2023 [1 favorite]

Cool beans!
posted by Pronoiac at 8:32 PM on August 21, 2023 [1 favorite]