How can I be happy as a member of the dumber, less attractive sex?
January 25, 2015 7:28 AM   Subscribe

I'm not happy being a female and never really have been. I love men and think they're so much smarter, funnier, and more physically attractive. How can I be confident in my own skin if I can't relate to finding a girl "hot" and don't understand what brilliant men see in us silly girls?

This is my first post on MetaFilter, so please be kind. I wouldn't normally spout off such un-PC views in real life... but that's what the Internet is for, right?

I was raised among liberals and egalitarians. I even attended a women's college where my opinions were encouraged and I was told to pursue a glittering career. I am currently single but have dated several men who treated me wonderfully and adored me inside and out. And yet...

Women: I don't really understand the hype about us.

I don't think women are as attractive as men. We need lots of makeup just to look decent. Our hips are angled strangely and we look ridiculous when running or engaging in other physical activities. We're not strong like men; we barely even develop muscles after months of weightlifting -- not that we should endeavor to become buff, because heterosexual men seem to prefer us looking spindly or blobby, without much muscular definition at all. And there's not much point in fussing with our looks at all after the age of 35 or so, when we lose most of our appeal in the eyes of even the most ardent fan of female "beauty".

Women aren't as smart as men -- or, to be more precise, the smartest people in society are overwhelmingly male. I don't particularly care whether this is due to innate ability or to differing interests, because the outcome is the same either way. The women I know (myself included) want to sit around chatting about boys or fashion or feelings in their free time. The men talk about stocks, history, tech, science.... You get the picture. Magazines geared toward the respective sexes reflect these stark differences. The greatest writers, inventors, comedians, scientists, philosophers, artists and composers throughout history have overwhelmingly been male. Now that women are free to innovate and create, what have we produced? Fashion magazines? Reality TV shows? Or have men made those and we're just consuming them?

I've been carrying this sense of inferiority all my life, and it's only increased as I've entered adulthood. I'm now 30. Feel free to prove me wrong--really, I'd be happy to see these ideas challenged. But my question is this: How can I be happy as a woman, and confident when dating, given that I don't understand what men see in women at all?
posted by Guinevere to Science & Nature (1 answer total)

This post was deleted for the following reason: This needs to not be a manifesto on how much women suck if it's going to work here, sorry. -- restless_nomad

There is no way to be happy while hating yourself. You can either work to overcome your internalized misogyny or you can be miserable. Your choice.
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 7:34 AM on January 25, 2015 [12 favorites]

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