More catchphrases like this

May 14, 2005 5:05 AM

Looking for more of these types of catchphrases: "like rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic" or "How did you enjoy the play otherwise, Mrs. Lincoln?" Formula: take a famous historical event and add a sardonic element. (Not like "Et tu Brute" or "Dr. Livingstone I presume" -- they lack the second element.) Can you think of more? Is there one about Custer?
posted by nancoix to Writing & Language (23 answers total)

"Look at all the Indians!"
posted by Leon at 5:50 AM on May 14, 2005

The way I heard it was that Custer's Last Words were "Where did all these f*cking Indians come from?"
posted by hardcode at 5:55 AM on May 14, 2005

Or "Where'd all those Indians come from", which my father says whenever trying to make a left turn across traffic.
posted by sohcahtoa at 5:56 AM on May 14, 2005

In the immortal words of Socrates: "I drank what?"

/Real Genius
posted by psmealey at 6:35 AM on May 14, 2005

"I think I've got something in my eye - could you.."
posted by TimothyMason at 9:09 AM on May 14, 2005

Icarus
-"It's offly hot today."

The Hinderburg Riders
-"Do you want a cigarette?"
posted by drezdn at 9:12 AM on May 14, 2005

"Looks like we're surrounded by Indians, Tonto."
"What do you mean we, paleface."
posted by SPrintF at 9:29 AM on May 14, 2005

"...needed that like Custer needed another Indian"
posted by jlkr at 9:29 AM on May 14, 2005

These are just a few examples that I have heard people around the office use:

"We realized at that point that our CEO was essentially looking for a good coq au vin at dienbienphu"

"When the NASDAQ fell I felt like the archduke Ferdinand's driver"

and the variation:

"When the NASDAQ fell I felt like JFK's auto-detailer"

And my personal favorite:

"After I saw the competitor's presentation I realized that our company was waterskiing on Lake Trasimene."
posted by mokujin at 10:00 AM on May 14, 2005

Two more variations:

"After the first wave of downsizing I was standing there like..."

a) "the dome in Hiroshima"

b) "the Frauenkirche at Dresden"
posted by mokujin at 10:07 AM on May 14, 2005

There's the infamous Douglas Adams line, from the second hitchhiker's radio series:

"You might as well lower haystacks off the boat deck of the Lusitania."

Infamous because when asked, Adams himself couldn't remember what it was supposed to mean.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 10:35 AM on May 14, 2005

Peter. I can see your house from here.
posted by horsewithnoname at 11:19 AM on May 14, 2005

"But other than that, how did you find Dallas, Mrs. Kennedy?"
posted by dejah420 at 12:01 PM on May 14, 2005

descartes: "i think not."
posted by quonsar at 3:10 PM on May 14, 2005

Fiddling while Rome burns (maybe?)
posted by Pattie at 4:18 PM on May 14, 2005

To paraphrase Micheal O'Donohue:

As Sir Winston Churchill once said in response to a haughty society matron who self-righteously chided him for his tippling at an official function: "Go f*** yourself, lady."

Then there's this one, not really historic (yet), used to describe an unfair fight: He laid into that Coco's waitress like Dobson on a dachshund.
posted by maryh at 4:40 PM on May 14, 2005

Re Winston Churchill -
Madam, I'm drunk and you're ugly, but I'll be sober tomorrow.
posted by adamvasco at 5:39 PM on May 14, 2005

To paraphrase Micheal O'Donohue:

Here's the actual quote, from The Churchill Wit (FOUL LANGUAGE AHOY):

Churchill was known to drain a glass or two and, after one particularly convivial evening, he chanced to encounter Miss Bessie Braddock, a Socialist member of the House of Commons, who, upon seeing his condition, said, "Winston, you're drunk." Mustering all his dignity, Churchill drew himself up to his full height, cocked an eyebrow and rejoined, "Shove it up your ass, you ugly cunt."
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 5:43 PM on May 14, 2005

Hilarious link Pink. Here's one from my grandfather (a WWI veteran and native of south Louisiana) "The only problem with Paris/New Orleans is that its full of Frenchmen". He also took great pleasure in greeting said Frenchmen with "Barnyard manure how the hell are you". (Bonjour/barnyard, monsieur/manure...)
posted by Carbolic at 6:25 PM on May 14, 2005

"about as useful as a screen door on a submarine."

/old
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 8:16 PM on May 14, 2005

"I freed the what?!"
posted by nicwolff at 8:32 PM on May 14, 2005

"That bathroom is occupied like Vichy France."
posted by Hadroed at 12:51 AM on May 15, 2005

Perhaps it's time you sat down, Custer.
posted by orange swan at 9:44 AM on May 15, 2005