I am collecting Britishisms!
June 25, 2010 3:17 AM Subscribe
I need a lot of funny old-fashioned British expressions to throw into conversations with my British friend.
I'm looking for anything I can say in a thick accent and insert to casually make fun of him. Stuff like "old chap"; things that one can imagine either an old British man with a pipe and a cap saying, or somebody out of Dickensian London. Or other. Fun little expressions!
I'm looking for anything I can say in a thick accent and insert to casually make fun of him. Stuff like "old chap"; things that one can imagine either an old British man with a pipe and a cap saying, or somebody out of Dickensian London. Or other. Fun little expressions!
My advice is to read a lot of PG Wodehouse.
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 3:28 AM on June 25, 2010 [4 favorites]
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 3:28 AM on June 25, 2010 [4 favorites]
came in to suggest the same thing. And to mix it up with the Wodehouse, watch Lock Stock and 2 Smoking Barrels
posted by runincircles at 3:33 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by runincircles at 3:33 AM on June 25, 2010
Me and my friends used to do this (we British do love taking this piss out of ourselves) and our favourites were using what the old brits used to call each other:
Old bean
Old sport
Old fellow
Old fruit
(I'm not sure why the "old" but there it is)
Dear chap
My dear sir/madam
etc etc.
posted by greenish at 3:35 AM on June 25, 2010
Old bean
Old sport
Old fellow
Old fruit
(I'm not sure why the "old" but there it is)
Dear chap
My dear sir/madam
etc etc.
posted by greenish at 3:35 AM on June 25, 2010
"Pip pip!" said (jauntily) for goodbye.
posted by thoughtless at 3:36 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by thoughtless at 3:36 AM on June 25, 2010
Or some Lauren Cooper!
Can't do a YT link, as I am at work, but she'll be all over it.
posted by Ziggy500 at 3:37 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
Can't do a YT link, as I am at work, but she'll be all over it.
posted by Ziggy500 at 3:37 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
Oh I just realised you meant old fashioned. Please ignore my last post.
I'll just leave now...
posted by Ziggy500 at 3:37 AM on June 25, 2010
I'll just leave now...
posted by Ziggy500 at 3:37 AM on June 25, 2010
"It reminds me of the time time I was in the Boer War..., it seems we'd run out of tea..." flumgh flumgh flumgh.
posted by qwip at 3:39 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by qwip at 3:39 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
Do you know where in the UK he's from? We could provide very specific colloquialisms that would really surprise him!
posted by ceri richard at 3:40 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by ceri richard at 3:40 AM on June 25, 2010
Oh, just realized you meant old fashioned. Brits tend to mock each other by calling each other rude names (my other post) and using cockney slang.
posted by zia at 3:42 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by zia at 3:42 AM on June 25, 2010
I say, old chap! What a rum turn of events! The perfect thing for you would be to look up and read some PG Wodehouse. He's bally good, by Jove! Just the ticket, in fact! Bertie Wooster was given to all manner of odd exclamations although it's Jeeves who seems to be the most famous these days. Dash it all! Ignore the book and go directly for the DVD's where you can watch a young Hugh Laurie being a perfect upper-class twat to Stephen Fry's unctuous Jeeves. Good grief, man. What are you waiting for? Stop acting like a big girls blouse and put some welly into it!
posted by ninazer0 at 3:58 AM on June 25, 2010 [9 favorites]
posted by ninazer0 at 3:58 AM on June 25, 2010 [9 favorites]
Good grief! (No, not that....I'm just a-m-a-z-e-d).
posted by JtJ at 4:00 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by JtJ at 4:00 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
What-ho!
By Jove!
Zounds!
Egads!
Gadzooks!
What what!
That was a wicked googly!
Huzzah!
Jolly good show!
Johnny Foreigner!
John Bull (a british person)
Tupenny whore!
Capital!
Lawks!
Coo-ee!
Blimey!
Rule Brittania!
Things being dicky (a dicky knee)
Things being gammy (a gammy leg)
Germans = Jerry
Me old china (cockney for mate)
There's heaps.
posted by smoke at 4:03 AM on June 25, 2010
By Jove!
Zounds!
Egads!
Gadzooks!
What what!
That was a wicked googly!
Huzzah!
Jolly good show!
Johnny Foreigner!
John Bull (a british person)
Tupenny whore!
Capital!
Lawks!
Coo-ee!
Blimey!
Rule Brittania!
Things being dicky (a dicky knee)
Things being gammy (a gammy leg)
Germans = Jerry
Me old china (cockney for mate)
There's heaps.
posted by smoke at 4:03 AM on June 25, 2010
You could make it really authentic by not calling him 'British'?!
I am not trying to snark - I've noticed that a lot of Americans describe someone as being 'British' when actually this is hardly ever how people from Great Britain describe themselves. Usually it means 'English' which actually is only a bit of Britain.
If you want old-fashioned English colloquialisms, that's one thing - but if your friend is actually Irish or Welsh or Scottish, saying 'pip pip! toodle-oo! I say! raaaaather! old bean!' might be a bit annoying/offensive.
If you do want Irish or Welsh or Scottish colloquialisms, we will need to think again!
posted by citands at 4:04 AM on June 25, 2010 [9 favorites]
I am not trying to snark - I've noticed that a lot of Americans describe someone as being 'British' when actually this is hardly ever how people from Great Britain describe themselves. Usually it means 'English' which actually is only a bit of Britain.
If you want old-fashioned English colloquialisms, that's one thing - but if your friend is actually Irish or Welsh or Scottish, saying 'pip pip! toodle-oo! I say! raaaaather! old bean!' might be a bit annoying/offensive.
If you do want Irish or Welsh or Scottish colloquialisms, we will need to think again!
posted by citands at 4:04 AM on June 25, 2010 [9 favorites]
I like driving my Englishman up the wall by parroting his use of Americanisms. You haven't lived until you've heard one posh Cambridge graduate hail another with "What's up, dog?"
But, yeah, if your British friend is Welsh or Scots or Irish or a northerner, he'll be as annoyed by the toodle-pips as you probably would if every Brit you met assumed you were a gun-toting creationist.
posted by stuck on an island at 4:11 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
But, yeah, if your British friend is Welsh or Scots or Irish or a northerner, he'll be as annoyed by the toodle-pips as you probably would if every Brit you met assumed you were a gun-toting creationist.
posted by stuck on an island at 4:11 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
but if your friend is actually Irish or Welsh or Scottish, saying 'pip pip! toodle-oo! I say! raaaaather! old bean!' might be a bit annoying/offensive.
...even if he is english, he'll probably find it at the very least annoying.
posted by missmagenta at 4:12 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
...even if he is english, he'll probably find it at the very least annoying.
posted by missmagenta at 4:12 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
In a high pitched old lady voice, ask if he's been shopping. If he get's it, he'll say "No, I been shopping."
Mention you're going to the toilet. Order spotted dick when out at a bar. Refer to women as birds and call them love if he's within earshot. Refer to him as mate. Finish sentences with "innit."
Other words might be splendid, cheers, are-you-alright, cuppa, etc.
posted by motsque at 4:27 AM on June 25, 2010
Mention you're going to the toilet. Order spotted dick when out at a bar. Refer to women as birds and call them love if he's within earshot. Refer to him as mate. Finish sentences with "innit."
Other words might be splendid, cheers, are-you-alright, cuppa, etc.
posted by motsque at 4:27 AM on June 25, 2010
Most of these "old fashioned British expressions" come with more context than you may imagine.
All of the "toodle pip, I say!" phrases are associated with upper class people who went to public schools (i.e. very very snobby schools), probably from the South of England, in fact, people a lot like Jeeves and Wooster themselves.
Cockney rhyming slang is associated with working class Londoners.
The vast majority of British people are neither of these things, and neither were their ancestors.
If you use these expressions, you're not saying "hey, look how old fashioned I am!" or "hey look how British I am". You're making a joke about your friend's class background. Saying "Toodle Pip! I say!" could carry a subtext like "Wow, you are wearing a very upmarket outfit considering that you're a plumber".
Make sure you understand what your friend's attitude to class is before you go making fun of it to his/her face.
posted by emilyw at 4:32 AM on June 25, 2010 [13 favorites]
All of the "toodle pip, I say!" phrases are associated with upper class people who went to public schools (i.e. very very snobby schools), probably from the South of England, in fact, people a lot like Jeeves and Wooster themselves.
Cockney rhyming slang is associated with working class Londoners.
The vast majority of British people are neither of these things, and neither were their ancestors.
If you use these expressions, you're not saying "hey, look how old fashioned I am!" or "hey look how British I am". You're making a joke about your friend's class background. Saying "Toodle Pip! I say!" could carry a subtext like "Wow, you are wearing a very upmarket outfit considering that you're a plumber".
Make sure you understand what your friend's attitude to class is before you go making fun of it to his/her face.
posted by emilyw at 4:32 AM on June 25, 2010 [13 favorites]
errr, with people like Bertie Wooster, not like his manservant Jeeves.
posted by emilyw at 4:35 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by emilyw at 4:35 AM on June 25, 2010
You might try The Septic's Companion, which explains the origins of Cockney Rhyming Slang in a way that is pretty straightforward for those of us who don't speak The Queen's English.
Straight from the amazon review:
The bulk of the book is comprised of the translation dictionary, which lists UK words, their US equivalent, a definition and a witty saying. I know that sounds formulaic, but the result is anything but boring (reading a list of words with their definitions; now that would be boring). Throughout the book, Mr. Rae's humor remains fresh and surprising, and, by happy chance, the translations are actually interesting and useful.
You will learn that cockney slang consists of a two word couplet in which the last word rhymes with the word being referenced, but in usage, only the first word of the couplet is spoken -- hence the name of the book.
("Yank" is slang for American, the cockney rhyme for "yank" is "septic tank," shortened "septic" -- hence, Septic's Companion!)
posted by frmrpreztaft at 4:40 AM on June 25, 2010
Straight from the amazon review:
The bulk of the book is comprised of the translation dictionary, which lists UK words, their US equivalent, a definition and a witty saying. I know that sounds formulaic, but the result is anything but boring (reading a list of words with their definitions; now that would be boring). Throughout the book, Mr. Rae's humor remains fresh and surprising, and, by happy chance, the translations are actually interesting and useful.
You will learn that cockney slang consists of a two word couplet in which the last word rhymes with the word being referenced, but in usage, only the first word of the couplet is spoken -- hence the name of the book.
("Yank" is slang for American, the cockney rhyme for "yank" is "septic tank," shortened "septic" -- hence, Septic's Companion!)
posted by frmrpreztaft at 4:40 AM on June 25, 2010
Pretty much anything related to cricket or Shakespeare will serve. Close of Play, Googly, Sticky Wicket, Maiden over, Nightwatchman, ...
For regionalisms, "ducks" (Bristol+SW), "luv" (North), "claggy" (Whitby - look it up) - the list is endless.
posted by rogerdboyle at 4:43 AM on June 25, 2010
For regionalisms, "ducks" (Bristol+SW), "luv" (North), "claggy" (Whitby - look it up) - the list is endless.
posted by rogerdboyle at 4:43 AM on June 25, 2010
Georgette Heyer takes you further back with Regency cant and expressions
posted by infini at 5:11 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by infini at 5:11 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
Just finish any story with .... and of course I was very very drunk
like thish chap
posted by itsjustanalias at 5:20 AM on June 25, 2010 [2 favorites]
like thish chap
posted by itsjustanalias at 5:20 AM on June 25, 2010 [2 favorites]
Watch some Monty Python skits -- masters of hilarious offensiveness. http://orangecow.org/pythonet/sketches/woodytin.htm
posted by theredpen at 5:23 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by theredpen at 5:23 AM on June 25, 2010
Seriously, don't do it. You'll just end up looking like an arse. You won't be making fun of him, you'll be making a complete tit of yourself.
posted by salmacis at 5:38 AM on June 25, 2010 [10 favorites]
posted by salmacis at 5:38 AM on June 25, 2010 [10 favorites]
I'm just getting hooked on Battlestar Galatica (yup, late adopter - no spoilers please!) and loving how starkly British the Gaius character is. I noted a particularly pleasing moment last night when he came out with that classic sixties put down: 'Oh, do me a favour!'. Check him out, there's a fair few Britishisms in there. See also Spike, late of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, for similar effect.
BTW few people actually speak like this in Britain, at least not outside of London.
posted by freya_lamb at 5:41 AM on June 25, 2010
BTW few people actually speak like this in Britain, at least not outside of London.
posted by freya_lamb at 5:41 AM on June 25, 2010
Careful now. I think quite a lot of these suggestions will just make your friend wonder why you've started talking like a wazzock; a few of them he won't understand at all; while in about ten percent of cases ('going to the toilet') he won't even notice anything unusual.
posted by Phanx at 5:48 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by Phanx at 5:48 AM on June 25, 2010
Regency cant and expressions
A far more thorough collection.
Excerpts:
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 5:58 AM on June 25, 2010 [6 favorites]
A far more thorough collection.
Excerpts:
- ADMIRAL OF THE NARROW SEAS (c. 1811): One who from drunkenness vomits into the lap of the person sitting opposite to him.
- SNUFFLES (c. 1811): A cold in the head, attended with a running at the nose.
- RANTALLION (c. 1811): One whose scrotum is so relaxed as to be longer than his penis, i.e. whose shot pouch is longer that the barrel of his piece.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 5:58 AM on June 25, 2010 [6 favorites]
Life isn't all beer and skittles! Except when you are an ancient DudeMaster, of course
posted by ouke at 6:05 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by ouke at 6:05 AM on June 25, 2010
More fun excerpts:
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 6:09 AM on June 25, 2010
- RANDLE (c. 1811): A set of nonsensical verses, repeated in Ireland by schoolboys, and young people, who have been guilty of breaking wind backwards before any of their compa- nions; if they neglect this apology, they are liable to certain kicks, pinches, and fillips, which are accompanied with divers admonitory couplets.
- WHIP-JACKS (c. 1737): counterfeit Mariners begging with false Passes, pretending Ship-wrecks, great Losses at Sea, narrow Escapes, etc. telling dismal Stories, having learnt Tar-Terms on purpose: but are meer Cheats, and will not stick to rob a Booth at a Fair, or an House in soem By-road. They often carry their Morts or Wenches, which the pretend to be their Wives, whom they miraculously saved in the Shipwreck, altho all their Children were drowned, the Ship splitting on a Rock near the Lands-End, with such like Forgeries.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 6:09 AM on June 25, 2010
Talk like a pilot day has some fun and ridiculous British phrases, which may or may not be useful.
posted by charles kaapjes at 6:14 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by charles kaapjes at 6:14 AM on June 25, 2010
Refer to women as birds
Please don't. It's sexist and nthing that you'd sound a right tit for using it. Stick to the more general things, if all you're doing is having a laugh.
posted by kuppajava at 6:14 AM on June 25, 2010
Please don't. It's sexist and nthing that you'd sound a right tit for using it. Stick to the more general things, if all you're doing is having a laugh.
posted by kuppajava at 6:14 AM on June 25, 2010
Be very careful going down this path: as an Englishman who worked almost exclusively with Americans for three years, I had to bluntly ask two people to stop doing something similar because it was just irritating/offensive, rather than amusing.
posted by robtoo at 6:17 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by robtoo at 6:17 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
Be very careful going down this path: as an Englishman who worked almost exclusively with Americans for three years, I had to bluntly ask two people to stop doing something similar because it was just irritating/offensive, rather than amusing.
This. Please don't. I broke off contact with a friend of a friend in Canada as she just wouldn't stop. You're walking into a minefield.
I know substitution is a really facile thing to do, but imagine if you'd asked: "I need a lot of funny old-fashioned Persian expressions to throw into conversations with my Iranian friend. I'm looking for anything I can say in a thick accent and insert to casually make fun of him." Do you think that would be a good question?
The point is, if you boil somebody right down just to where they come from -- wherever it is -- and just interact with them on that basis, you've got the seed of prejudice right there.
If you do want actual good-natured ribbing, which is the second lubrication of British interaction (the first being alcohol), then find out what soccer team they support and then start supporting the other one.
posted by randomination at 6:42 AM on June 25, 2010 [12 favorites]
This. Please don't. I broke off contact with a friend of a friend in Canada as she just wouldn't stop. You're walking into a minefield.
I know substitution is a really facile thing to do, but imagine if you'd asked: "I need a lot of funny old-fashioned Persian expressions to throw into conversations with my Iranian friend. I'm looking for anything I can say in a thick accent and insert to casually make fun of him." Do you think that would be a good question?
The point is, if you boil somebody right down just to where they come from -- wherever it is -- and just interact with them on that basis, you've got the seed of prejudice right there.
If you do want actual good-natured ribbing, which is the second lubrication of British interaction (the first being alcohol), then find out what soccer team they support and then start supporting the other one.
posted by randomination at 6:42 AM on June 25, 2010 [12 favorites]
Warning! Some of the replies are really idiotic. Ask someone you trust to give a good answer, or just start absorbing more British culture. That's how we Brits know a lot of Americanisms. But listening to Mike Myers might be useful. He's a Canadian with British parents who grew up watching British stuff, and he manages to send up our idioms in a nice, funny way.
posted by Deor at 6:51 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by Deor at 6:51 AM on June 25, 2010
You must call him guv'ner.
My younger daughter has (or had, she's almost outgrown it) that classic little-kid accent that is part Brooklyn, part Cockney. Occasionally after she makes a particularly Cockney statement we will say "Pip pip, Guv'nah!" It used to make her furious but now it makes her laugh.
posted by padraigin at 7:26 AM on June 25, 2010
My younger daughter has (or had, she's almost outgrown it) that classic little-kid accent that is part Brooklyn, part Cockney. Occasionally after she makes a particularly Cockney statement we will say "Pip pip, Guv'nah!" It used to make her furious but now it makes her laugh.
posted by padraigin at 7:26 AM on June 25, 2010
Nthing Deor's comment above: this is going to get very, very irritating very quickly if not done in the right way and Myers is one of the few who's managed to straddle both cultures quite effectively. Of course, by Mike Myers we really mean Austin Powers and not, for example, The Guru.
Although I also agree that repeatedly calling someone a bellend is one of the funniest things you can do.
By the way, can you do some sort of English accent reasonably well? If you can, which is unusual, then go for it, but if you even suspect that you can't, then just use the words and don't try the accent. A bad accent will exponentially accelerate the irritation.
Go on then.
posted by HopStopDon'tShop at 7:27 AM on June 25, 2010
Although I also agree that repeatedly calling someone a bellend is one of the funniest things you can do.
By the way, can you do some sort of English accent reasonably well? If you can, which is unusual, then go for it, but if you even suspect that you can't, then just use the words and don't try the accent. A bad accent will exponentially accelerate the irritation.
Go on then.
posted by HopStopDon'tShop at 7:27 AM on June 25, 2010
Just say 'bloody 'ell' and 'brilliant' and 'old bean' a lot.
And be prepared to get punched in the nose.
posted by spilon at 7:31 AM on June 25, 2010 [2 favorites]
And be prepared to get punched in the nose.
posted by spilon at 7:31 AM on June 25, 2010 [2 favorites]
Even if you can do the English accent (what is that btw? English accents vary tremendously) don't do it. You'll still use the wrong words in the wrong places in the wrong context.
posted by salmacis at 7:39 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by salmacis at 7:39 AM on June 25, 2010
Seriously, don't do it. You'll just end up looking like an arse. You won't be making fun of him, you'll be making a complete tit of yourself.
This.
posted by dmt at 7:42 AM on June 25, 2010 [2 favorites]
This.
posted by dmt at 7:42 AM on June 25, 2010 [2 favorites]
But but but but...why is it so funny to me when non-Americans mimic an American accent and, like, you know, man, totally make fun of the way I like, speak? Dude?
posted by padraigin at 7:56 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by padraigin at 7:56 AM on June 25, 2010
Maybe they don't make such a pig's ear of it as almost all Americans do when trying to sound British. American culture is exported all over the world, so non-Americans have a much better idea how Americans talk than the other way round.
posted by salmacis at 8:03 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by salmacis at 8:03 AM on June 25, 2010
Warning! Some of the replies are really idiotic.
Seriously. In fact the majority of them are, particularly anything related to the 'toodle pip!' "what ho!' style answers. They are just dumb and I have had a lot of that since moving to the US and then Canada. They make zero sense to me, yet seem to be enormously amusing to the colonials...
I'm not trying to be too disparaging about this, but it is such a bizarre and yet widespread thing, that it does need quashing if you want to create any sort of amenable conversation. It's no more relevant than shouting "Petang! WIBBLE! BOOP! GOBBLESNOT! BLARP" would be to an american.
This is not amusing piss taking (the name we use for the effect you are hoping to achieve). It is, to me and most of my peers, utterly nonsensical and baffling random nonsense that Americans and Canadians spout when they think they are being amusing and making fun of England/the English.
To further clarify: From an English perspective, the majority of those 'insults' will just make you look a tit to us, because they make no sense at all as an insult, nor as any sort of stereotype of the English. Your desired effect will be several times better in your imagination than the blank stare you will get as a response. Anyone uttering the phrases that Americans think are 'Britishisms' just makes them look clueless and/or ignorant more than anything else.
Witness this thread.
From any other British perspective, as noted, you will be (with your toodle pips and the like) be stirring up all kinds of bad blood using those with any sort of Welsh/Scottish or Irish heritage. The English upper class as a concept is pretty much hated as an association by these people (and even a lot of English) and calling someone 'posh' (ie rich and entitled) like that can be insulting anyway. It means the same as "You're stuck up and full of yourself" to many/most.
Honestly, COMPLETELY DROP any cutesy attempt at 'old fashioned'. You cannot hope to understand the fuller relevance of it all, and no-one from that Island will find it anywhere near as amusing as you. At best, nonsensical, at worst offensive. Stick to contemporary stuff you find amusing about the British Isles, but do make sure you fully understand the implications of the background of the person (ie don't call a Scot an Englishman etc). That is much less of a minefield, and there is no blanket kind of 'fun at you' style
posted by Brockles at 8:05 AM on June 25, 2010 [9 favorites]
Seriously. In fact the majority of them are, particularly anything related to the 'toodle pip!' "what ho!' style answers. They are just dumb and I have had a lot of that since moving to the US and then Canada. They make zero sense to me, yet seem to be enormously amusing to the colonials...
I'm not trying to be too disparaging about this, but it is such a bizarre and yet widespread thing, that it does need quashing if you want to create any sort of amenable conversation. It's no more relevant than shouting "Petang! WIBBLE! BOOP! GOBBLESNOT! BLARP" would be to an american.
This is not amusing piss taking (the name we use for the effect you are hoping to achieve). It is, to me and most of my peers, utterly nonsensical and baffling random nonsense that Americans and Canadians spout when they think they are being amusing and making fun of England/the English.
To further clarify: From an English perspective, the majority of those 'insults' will just make you look a tit to us, because they make no sense at all as an insult, nor as any sort of stereotype of the English. Your desired effect will be several times better in your imagination than the blank stare you will get as a response. Anyone uttering the phrases that Americans think are 'Britishisms' just makes them look clueless and/or ignorant more than anything else.
Witness this thread.
From any other British perspective, as noted, you will be (with your toodle pips and the like) be stirring up all kinds of bad blood using those with any sort of Welsh/Scottish or Irish heritage. The English upper class as a concept is pretty much hated as an association by these people (and even a lot of English) and calling someone 'posh' (ie rich and entitled) like that can be insulting anyway. It means the same as "You're stuck up and full of yourself" to many/most.
Honestly, COMPLETELY DROP any cutesy attempt at 'old fashioned'. You cannot hope to understand the fuller relevance of it all, and no-one from that Island will find it anywhere near as amusing as you. At best, nonsensical, at worst offensive. Stick to contemporary stuff you find amusing about the British Isles, but do make sure you fully understand the implications of the background of the person (ie don't call a Scot an Englishman etc). That is much less of a minefield, and there is no blanket kind of 'fun at you' style
posted by Brockles at 8:05 AM on June 25, 2010 [9 favorites]
As a follow up to the "this" in this thread, I add: Don't force the comedy.
As an American (with a southern accent) who lived for a while in London, it was annoying when we'd try to poke fun at each others' accents. What was great is when we had all hung around each other so much that we were unconsciously using each others' idioms with our OWN native accents.
posted by pointystick at 8:23 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
As an American (with a southern accent) who lived for a while in London, it was annoying when we'd try to poke fun at each others' accents. What was great is when we had all hung around each other so much that we were unconsciously using each others' idioms with our OWN native accents.
posted by pointystick at 8:23 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
But but but but...why is it so funny to me when non-Americans mimic an American accent and, like, you know, man, totally make fun of the way I like, speak? Dude?
He doesn't want to mimic the way his friend speaks, he wants to spout a load of nonsense 'britishisms' that no-one here ever says and aren't funny.
If you want to take the piss out of your friend, take the piss out of him not some made up stereotype that has no relevance to him.
posted by missmagenta at 8:24 AM on June 25, 2010
He doesn't want to mimic the way his friend speaks, he wants to spout a load of nonsense 'britishisms' that no-one here ever says and aren't funny.
If you want to take the piss out of your friend, take the piss out of him not some made up stereotype that has no relevance to him.
posted by missmagenta at 8:24 AM on June 25, 2010
Yes, this is not going to work. Even if you read and memorized a bunch of expressions, it would be pointless, because at least half of the effect is due to the emphasis and intonation. You don't get the intonation right, and it'll be like a German guy I know, who tries out Americanisms on me - the words are all correct, but the intonation is a kind of even, pedantic, delivery which completely obliterates the effect. And getting the intonation just right doesn't come out of a dictionary, it must be heard - otherwise the odds are you'll merely puzzle your listener. Avoid.
posted by VikingSword at 8:25 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by VikingSword at 8:25 AM on June 25, 2010
Sorry, another vote from the school of "If you did this to me more than once I would want to punch you, and if you persisted would probably stop speaking to you all together."
For my part, it would be because it implies that you're one of "those Americans" (I know... in itself a generalisation, but you'd be playing up to it) that apparently believes that we all live as if we're characters in some kind of terribly twee upper class Merchant Ivory/Jeeves and Wooster mashup, rather than normal people from a huge variety of backgrounds living in the 21st century.
I'm sure you're not such an idiot as to believe that, but that's how you'll come across if you do this.
posted by penguin pie at 8:34 AM on June 25, 2010 [3 favorites]
For my part, it would be because it implies that you're one of "those Americans" (I know... in itself a generalisation, but you'd be playing up to it) that apparently believes that we all live as if we're characters in some kind of terribly twee upper class Merchant Ivory/Jeeves and Wooster mashup, rather than normal people from a huge variety of backgrounds living in the 21st century.
I'm sure you're not such an idiot as to believe that, but that's how you'll come across if you do this.
posted by penguin pie at 8:34 AM on June 25, 2010 [3 favorites]
This question has gone a bit pear-shaped.
posted by hilaritas at 9:00 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by hilaritas at 9:00 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
I'd say it's bloody knackered, old chum.
posted by penguin pie at 9:18 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by penguin pie at 9:18 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
Totally don't do this. He'll be polite to you about it while thinking you are a total ass-hat, wishing you would just stop. RIGHT COWBOY YE-HAH TEAM AMERICA YEAH!!!
posted by BurnMage at 9:31 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by BurnMage at 9:31 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
I tease my British friend by saying "litchrally" instead of "literally" and vitamins pronounced "vih-tah-mihns." He gets the picture.
posted by Rudy Gerner at 9:41 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by Rudy Gerner at 9:41 AM on June 25, 2010
Seriously, don't do it. You'll just end up looking like an arse. You won't be making fun of him, you'll be making a complete tit of yourself.
I'm reminded of an episode of Cheers where Woody has just returned from vacationing in England. He drives the gang at the bar nuts by peppering his conversation with words like "fortnight" and "crisps." Finally Sam says "Knock it off Woody, you're making an ass of yourself." Woody replies "I believe you mean 'arse,' Sam."
posted by Oriole Adams at 9:41 AM on June 25, 2010 [2 favorites]
I'm reminded of an episode of Cheers where Woody has just returned from vacationing in England. He drives the gang at the bar nuts by peppering his conversation with words like "fortnight" and "crisps." Finally Sam says "Knock it off Woody, you're making an ass of yourself." Woody replies "I believe you mean 'arse,' Sam."
posted by Oriole Adams at 9:41 AM on June 25, 2010 [2 favorites]
You can also tell him to "sod off." I learned most of my impolite Britishisms from Spike on "Buffy the Vampire Slayer."
posted by Rudy Gerner at 9:42 AM on June 25, 2010
posted by Rudy Gerner at 9:42 AM on June 25, 2010
"BTW few people actually speak like this in Britain, at least not outside of London."
'Do me a favour' is really common, though.
Agree with some posters here who say this could be very annoying. As a British person I find a lot of 'British things' USians bandy around to be on a scale between inaccurate and annoying. (MrMippy is Scottish, and I love his accent, but he doesn't like me doing it with Scots phrases because it makes him feel like a bit of a novelty at times.)
also, I'm from Northern England, where our phrases are a bit different. We don't speak Cockney, or use many of these phrases at all - we have a totally different accent. We sound more like Daphne Moon (and to a UK audience the way Daphne's family seemed to come from all over the UK was bizarre). We say things like 'Blimey charlie!' - look up John Shuttleworth or the Beatles' Hard Day's Night film. Suggestions such as And to mix it up with the Wodehouse, watch Lock Stock and 2 Smoking Barrels misses out about 90% of the country, so it would just be a bit weird if he was neither super-posh nor from the tiny bit of London and Essex that actually speaks Cockney/Estuary English.
Some Northerners will get as pissed off as an Irish or Scots person if you make out that they speak all Cockney. I don't think class-based phrases will be annoying as much as the idea that the whole of the UK is a giant Charles Dickens/Merchant-Ivory theme park. It would be like me going up to a Californian and spouting New York stereotypes, y'know? And PLEASE don't imitate the accent unless you are very, very, very good. It is cringeworthy.
In a high pitched old lady voice, ask if he's been shopping. If he get's it, he'll say "No, I been shopping."
I don't know what this means.
Mention you're going to the toilet. Order spotted dick when out at a bar.
You can't buy spotted dick in a bar - in fact I don't think I've eaten it in my entire life.
Refer to women as birds and call them love if he's within earshot.
Bloody hell. Do not do this. Nor use phrases like Jerrys and Johnny Foreigner - they're just weird and a bit offensive now. You'll sound less 'British' and more like an Austin Powers impersonator, and what was the joke about Austin Powers?
Though personally, I quite like Chap-style phrases. You really need to drop them with a lot of irony, though.
posted by mippy at 9:57 AM on June 25, 2010 [2 favorites]
'Do me a favour' is really common, though.
Agree with some posters here who say this could be very annoying. As a British person I find a lot of 'British things' USians bandy around to be on a scale between inaccurate and annoying. (MrMippy is Scottish, and I love his accent, but he doesn't like me doing it with Scots phrases because it makes him feel like a bit of a novelty at times.)
also, I'm from Northern England, where our phrases are a bit different. We don't speak Cockney, or use many of these phrases at all - we have a totally different accent. We sound more like Daphne Moon (and to a UK audience the way Daphne's family seemed to come from all over the UK was bizarre). We say things like 'Blimey charlie!' - look up John Shuttleworth or the Beatles' Hard Day's Night film. Suggestions such as And to mix it up with the Wodehouse, watch Lock Stock and 2 Smoking Barrels misses out about 90% of the country, so it would just be a bit weird if he was neither super-posh nor from the tiny bit of London and Essex that actually speaks Cockney/Estuary English.
Some Northerners will get as pissed off as an Irish or Scots person if you make out that they speak all Cockney. I don't think class-based phrases will be annoying as much as the idea that the whole of the UK is a giant Charles Dickens/Merchant-Ivory theme park. It would be like me going up to a Californian and spouting New York stereotypes, y'know? And PLEASE don't imitate the accent unless you are very, very, very good. It is cringeworthy.
In a high pitched old lady voice, ask if he's been shopping. If he get's it, he'll say "No, I been shopping."
I don't know what this means.
Mention you're going to the toilet. Order spotted dick when out at a bar.
You can't buy spotted dick in a bar - in fact I don't think I've eaten it in my entire life.
Refer to women as birds and call them love if he's within earshot.
Bloody hell. Do not do this. Nor use phrases like Jerrys and Johnny Foreigner - they're just weird and a bit offensive now. You'll sound less 'British' and more like an Austin Powers impersonator, and what was the joke about Austin Powers?
Though personally, I quite like Chap-style phrases. You really need to drop them with a lot of irony, though.
posted by mippy at 9:57 AM on June 25, 2010 [2 favorites]
You'd be better off watching the following shows to get a handle on colloquial BrEng:
- Eastenders
- Coronation Street
- The Fast Show
- I'm Alan Partridge
- Peep Show
- The Street
- any Mike Leigh films
- The Inbetweeners (nb a lot of the ones here are pretty filthy)
posted by mippy at 10:00 AM on June 25, 2010
- Eastenders
- Coronation Street
- The Fast Show
- I'm Alan Partridge
- Peep Show
- The Street
- any Mike Leigh films
- The Inbetweeners (nb a lot of the ones here are pretty filthy)
posted by mippy at 10:00 AM on June 25, 2010
Or some Lauren Cooper!
Good suggestion, but
a) the phrases here have been very, very. very overexposed over here (see Little Britain) and we're a bit sick of them right now
b) there's a kind of social class element here, as Lauren is a 'chav' and if your mark is working class it's probably going to really piss them off.
posted by mippy at 10:02 AM on June 25, 2010
Good suggestion, but
a) the phrases here have been very, very. very overexposed over here (see Little Britain) and we're a bit sick of them right now
b) there's a kind of social class element here, as Lauren is a 'chav' and if your mark is working class it's probably going to really piss them off.
posted by mippy at 10:02 AM on June 25, 2010
mippy has it.
As a Northern Englishwoman living in the U.S., I hear a lot of Dick Van Dyke-isms and "Wotcha guvnor"-type comments from friends and strangers alike. Sometimes it annoys the crap out of me; sometimes it's just about funny. It can get really tiring having people talk in Monty Python voices to you all the time. So please don't do this unless you know your friend will get the joke.
I admit to using British comedy catchphrases and one-liners a lot in my everyday speech, but that's largely to amuse myself:
"Are you local?"
"What's all this shouting? We'll have no trouble here."
"That would be an ecumenical matter."
"Have you tried turning it off and turning it on again?"
(And for what it's worth, I haven't heard anyone called a wally in about 25 years.)
posted by vickyverky at 12:23 PM on June 25, 2010
As a Northern Englishwoman living in the U.S., I hear a lot of Dick Van Dyke-isms and "Wotcha guvnor"-type comments from friends and strangers alike. Sometimes it annoys the crap out of me; sometimes it's just about funny. It can get really tiring having people talk in Monty Python voices to you all the time. So please don't do this unless you know your friend will get the joke.
I admit to using British comedy catchphrases and one-liners a lot in my everyday speech, but that's largely to amuse myself:
"Are you local?"
"What's all this shouting? We'll have no trouble here."
"That would be an ecumenical matter."
"Have you tried turning it off and turning it on again?"
(And for what it's worth, I haven't heard anyone called a wally in about 25 years.)
posted by vickyverky at 12:23 PM on June 25, 2010
Oops. Obviously Father Ted is Irish. Off to flagellate myself.
posted by vickyverky at 12:23 PM on June 25, 2010
posted by vickyverky at 12:23 PM on June 25, 2010
I am not trying to snark - I've noticed that a lot of Americans describe someone as being 'British' when actually this is hardly ever how people from Great Britain describe themselves.
Actually, this isn't right, I'd say all Brits would describe themselves as Brits and wouldn't be unhappy being described that way, it's just that some may say Scottish or Welsh if they're sick of being called English. If you not sure if someone is Scottish or Welsh, then erring on British rather than English is a great idea.
Meanwhile if you really want to get to under the skin of the British dialect, then forget your pip-pips and what-hos (which aren't even anachronisms so much as some strange Dick Van Dyke bizarro English), and brush up on "Innit", "Dja know wa I mean?", "I aint being funny or nuffink", and all the other glottal-stopped Estuary bits and bobs that are both widely spoken and widely found irritating by native speakers (even while using the same language themselves). Alternatively find out where your British friend is actually from in the UK and research the local dialect - you're likely to find some remarkable words and phrases that they'll be surprised you know.
posted by iivix at 2:13 PM on June 25, 2010
Actually, this isn't right, I'd say all Brits would describe themselves as Brits and wouldn't be unhappy being described that way, it's just that some may say Scottish or Welsh if they're sick of being called English. If you not sure if someone is Scottish or Welsh, then erring on British rather than English is a great idea.
Meanwhile if you really want to get to under the skin of the British dialect, then forget your pip-pips and what-hos (which aren't even anachronisms so much as some strange Dick Van Dyke bizarro English), and brush up on "Innit", "Dja know wa I mean?", "I aint being funny or nuffink", and all the other glottal-stopped Estuary bits and bobs that are both widely spoken and widely found irritating by native speakers (even while using the same language themselves). Alternatively find out where your British friend is actually from in the UK and research the local dialect - you're likely to find some remarkable words and phrases that they'll be surprised you know.
posted by iivix at 2:13 PM on June 25, 2010
Actually, this isn't right, I'd say all Brits would describe themselves as Brits
Only to a customs agent when asked "what is your nationality". I can't think of anyone I know that would say, in a casual setting when asked where they are from anything other than "England/Wales/Scotland/N. Ireland". No-one would say I am from Great Britain that I have ever heard or heard of.
Yes, it's our nationality, but it's not where I'm from. That distinction is important to the majority, in my opinion.
posted by Brockles at 3:05 PM on June 25, 2010
Only to a customs agent when asked "what is your nationality". I can't think of anyone I know that would say, in a casual setting when asked where they are from anything other than "England/Wales/Scotland/N. Ireland". No-one would say I am from Great Britain that I have ever heard or heard of.
Yes, it's our nationality, but it's not where I'm from. That distinction is important to the majority, in my opinion.
posted by Brockles at 3:05 PM on June 25, 2010
Estuary phrases in a US accent would be pretty funny.
Yeah, 'Brits' is an analogue of 'Yanks' - something other countries would use to describe us. I don't make a big deal out of where I'm from but 'British' to describe posh English things jars with me (as does 'London England' and 'the Queen of England')
posted by mippy at 3:15 PM on June 25, 2010
Yeah, 'Brits' is an analogue of 'Yanks' - something other countries would use to describe us. I don't make a big deal out of where I'm from but 'British' to describe posh English things jars with me (as does 'London England' and 'the Queen of England')
posted by mippy at 3:15 PM on June 25, 2010
Also: as a 'Brit' I can't fucking stand Python recitals. It's ruined it for me as I heard so many poor imitations before the real thing.
Most people care not for cricket or Shakespeare. It would be like someone quoting Baseball and Mark Twain phrases a lot.
posted by mippy at 3:24 PM on June 25, 2010
Most people care not for cricket or Shakespeare. It would be like someone quoting Baseball and Mark Twain phrases a lot.
posted by mippy at 3:24 PM on June 25, 2010
As an Aussie (of English descent), I find there's the occasional American who insists on using various quaint ocker-isms in their speech (Stone the flamin' crows, it's bloody hot. Crikey, you're a bloody drongo - she's a real beaut sheila! etc etc etc). Personally, I find it hysterically funny.
So go ahead and try it. If your friend doesn't find it funny then stop. You're going to be the best person to judge this rather than us faceless strangers of teh intarwebs. (And the questions WAS about language rather than if this was all a good idea...)
posted by ninazer0 at 4:01 PM on June 25, 2010
So go ahead and try it. If your friend doesn't find it funny then stop. You're going to be the best person to judge this rather than us faceless strangers of teh intarwebs. (And the questions WAS about language rather than if this was all a good idea...)
posted by ninazer0 at 4:01 PM on June 25, 2010
Actually, this isn't right, I'd say all Brits would describe themselves as Brits and wouldn't be unhappy being described that way
...well you'd be wrong, as is pretty much anyone who states "all do/think/believe x" fwiw.
Like Brockles, I don't know anyone who refers to themselves as British rather than English, nor do they say they are from Britain when they are from England.
posted by missmagenta at 4:15 PM on June 25, 2010
...well you'd be wrong, as is pretty much anyone who states "all
Like Brockles, I don't know anyone who refers to themselves as British rather than English, nor do they say they are from Britain when they are from England.
posted by missmagenta at 4:15 PM on June 25, 2010
(I too refer to myself as British. I'm Welsh. I'm also European. But you'll make a twat of yourself sprinkling your speech with "quaint" English-ish ejaculations.)
posted by 4eyes at 7:48 PM on June 25, 2010
posted by 4eyes at 7:48 PM on June 25, 2010
("Iechyd da!" might be suitably distracting, though. Declare it before the first frothy sip of some tepid ale.)
posted by 4eyes at 7:56 PM on June 25, 2010
posted by 4eyes at 7:56 PM on June 25, 2010
I (British, English) am stopping by the echo the above sentiments. I've lived here over a decade and this is the quickest way to get me to never speak to you again, esp if it is in a professional context. I do, however, have affection for people who know how to use the word 'dodgy' as part of an actual conversation, rather than a bunch of outdated monty-pythonesque teasing.
posted by poissonrouge at 10:19 PM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by poissonrouge at 10:19 PM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]
This anglophile LOVES this question!
Well, since you have 73 comments, and I'm not British, the likelihood that I'll come up with something unique now is low. I agree with the advice to read your Wodehouse.. and your Evelyn Waugh, Kingsley Amis.. basically read a whole lot of classic and contemporary British literature. And watch your classic British comedies, and you'll just pick things up naturally. (Third bit of advice: befriend Stephen Fry. In real life, preferrably. He's pretty much a god, anyway.)
I have one further story: I was reading Lucky Jim by Kingsley Amis (HIGHLY recommended), and the title character kept mentioning about 'eating toothpaste.' As in: 'I bathed, ate some toothpaste, and then got dressed for breakfast.' I was very confused by this (it was mentioned in this manner a few times over the course of the book) and asked one of my British friends if that was a common British turn of phrase. She had no idea what I was talking about. Maybe that strikes you as an interesting Britishism?
posted by Mael Oui at 10:42 PM on June 25, 2010
Well, since you have 73 comments, and I'm not British, the likelihood that I'll come up with something unique now is low. I agree with the advice to read your Wodehouse.. and your Evelyn Waugh, Kingsley Amis.. basically read a whole lot of classic and contemporary British literature. And watch your classic British comedies, and you'll just pick things up naturally. (Third bit of advice: befriend Stephen Fry. In real life, preferrably. He's pretty much a god, anyway.)
I have one further story: I was reading Lucky Jim by Kingsley Amis (HIGHLY recommended), and the title character kept mentioning about 'eating toothpaste.' As in: 'I bathed, ate some toothpaste, and then got dressed for breakfast.' I was very confused by this (it was mentioned in this manner a few times over the course of the book) and asked one of my British friends if that was a common British turn of phrase. She had no idea what I was talking about. Maybe that strikes you as an interesting Britishism?
posted by Mael Oui at 10:42 PM on June 25, 2010
I've never heard this phrase before, but then Kingsley is much older and much posher than I.
Yes, Waugh, Mitford, Wilde and Wodehouse will give you some great phrases, but bear in mind they are very much of a time and place. For modern times, try the feature/opinion pages of a newspaper like the Guardian and Private Eye.
posted by mippy at 2:35 AM on June 26, 2010
Yes, Waugh, Mitford, Wilde and Wodehouse will give you some great phrases, but bear in mind they are very much of a time and place. For modern times, try the feature/opinion pages of a newspaper like the Guardian and Private Eye.
posted by mippy at 2:35 AM on June 26, 2010
I have never heard this before, but then Kingsley is much older and posher than I.
Yes, Wodehouse, Mitford, Waugh, Wilde and even Blyton will give you some excellent phrases, but bear in mind that these are very much of a time and a place, and using them may make you sound v.naff (Bridget Jones ism there). For modern phrases, try the comment/opinion pages of The Guardian or Private Eye.
Or, actually, watch The Thick of It. I'd link to some examples but am currently in a wargaming shop.
posted by mippy at 2:59 AM on June 26, 2010
Yes, Wodehouse, Mitford, Waugh, Wilde and even Blyton will give you some excellent phrases, but bear in mind that these are very much of a time and a place, and using them may make you sound v.naff (Bridget Jones ism there). For modern phrases, try the comment/opinion pages of The Guardian or Private Eye.
Or, actually, watch The Thick of It. I'd link to some examples but am currently in a wargaming shop.
posted by mippy at 2:59 AM on June 26, 2010
Response by poster: Thanks so much for your help, guys! I will make good use of your suggestions. He's from North London, for whatever that's worth
Don't worry, we're good friends and I won't overdo it. He's just constantly teasing me by dramatically over employing old American slang, so this is my attempt at returning the favor! It's just playful.
posted by howgenerica at 9:53 AM on June 26, 2010
Don't worry, we're good friends and I won't overdo it. He's just constantly teasing me by dramatically over employing old American slang, so this is my attempt at returning the favor! It's just playful.
posted by howgenerica at 9:53 AM on June 26, 2010
This thread is closed to new comments.
Serious question - are you sure your friend won't find this irritating?
posted by futureisunwritten at 3:25 AM on June 25, 2010 [2 favorites]