Do I need more of a social life?
March 29, 2008 4:03 PM Subscribe
How much am I missing out on by not having much of a social life?
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (38 answers total) 59 users marked this as a favorite
Of my own volition, I don't have much of a social life, and I'm wondering if I should make an effort to change this.
Some background: I'm a guy in college. I have good social skills and make friends easily. I don't have difficulty making small talk or empathizing. No emotional problems or other issues. I have many friends. However, I keep few close ones. I very rarely make plans to do things with friends. I often eat meals alone when it's convenient for me, and on weekends I keep myself busy with my own activities and projects. (I've been this way my whole life.)
The thing is that I don't feel the same kind of desire to be social that many people have. I can be alone for days without feeling lonely. I enjoy being around other people, but can't bring myself to make big efforts to do so. Several social groups repeatedly invite me places, but I keep declining.
I think part of my antisocial streak comes from the fact that I don't like typical social activities like going for meals and parties. Plus, none of the activities I do like would be much more exciting if I did them with someone else. A large portion of my time is spent ambitiously pursuing personal goals and overcoming personal challenges, things I really can't do with anyone else.
So, I'm wondering what I'm missing out on by not having a social life. Obviously, there's the element of companionship, but I don't feel like I really need companionship that much. Rather, one of the things that concerns me most is simply that I'm missing out on the practical resources that one gets from a network of friends. I'm referring to things like:
-Advice and honest criticism ("dude, you look like a tool in that jacket")
-Interesting information ("did you hear about the sale at XYZ store?")
-Mutual favors ("my friend's a web designer; he can help you out with that project.")
How much of life am I missing out on? Does it sound like I need to make more of an effort to be social?