Examples of overly simple solutions that were wrong
October 15, 2019 1:31 AM
I'm working on a piece for which some really pithily-expressed examples of simple "solutions" that don't/didn't help at all -- but that everyone will immediately recognize -- would be helpful.
For example, by now, most educated people probably know that "just eat less" isn't really an effective weight-loss strategy. Also (maybe) that slogans and sound bytes aren't really enough political discourse for a healthy election.
Any other, I hope better, examples? If they can be expressed in 2-7 words that would be awesome; if they're familiar enough, I can probably evoke them with a short phrase anyway.
Any ideas? Thanks in advance!
For example, by now, most educated people probably know that "just eat less" isn't really an effective weight-loss strategy. Also (maybe) that slogans and sound bytes aren't really enough political discourse for a healthy election.
Any other, I hope better, examples? If they can be expressed in 2-7 words that would be awesome; if they're familiar enough, I can probably evoke them with a short phrase anyway.
Any ideas? Thanks in advance!
Just forget about him/her.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 1:50 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 1:50 AM on October 15, 2019
DTMFA*, but that might be niche.
*Which is not to say it’s not often a wise recommendation by the time some has resorted to asking the internet about their relationship, but like losing weight, for people in the middle, it’s often not that simple, emotionally.
posted by penguin pie at 2:25 AM on October 15, 2019
*Which is not to say it’s not often a wise recommendation by the time some has resorted to asking the internet about their relationship, but like losing weight, for people in the middle, it’s often not that simple, emotionally.
posted by penguin pie at 2:25 AM on October 15, 2019
Trickle-down economics.
posted by brianogilvie at 2:32 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by brianogilvie at 2:32 AM on October 15, 2019
Frowning takes more muscles than smiling.
posted by flabdablet at 2:39 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by flabdablet at 2:39 AM on October 15, 2019
Just build more nuclear power.
posted by flabdablet at 2:41 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by flabdablet at 2:41 AM on October 15, 2019
Build a wall.
posted by flabdablet at 2:42 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by flabdablet at 2:42 AM on October 15, 2019
The market will regulate itself. / The law of supply and demand will take care of it.
posted by gakiko at 2:43 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by gakiko at 2:43 AM on October 15, 2019
Cut taxes on the rich.
posted by flabdablet at 2:48 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by flabdablet at 2:48 AM on October 15, 2019
Train and fund the Contras.
posted by flabdablet at 2:49 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by flabdablet at 2:49 AM on October 15, 2019
Burn it all down and start over.
posted by flabdablet at 2:50 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by flabdablet at 2:50 AM on October 15, 2019
Boys will be boys.
He's mean to you because he likes you.
posted by August Fury at 3:04 AM on October 15, 2019
He's mean to you because he likes you.
posted by August Fury at 3:04 AM on October 15, 2019
These are helpful.
I'd really love non-political, non-societal-issue examples.
I think I should be more specific, though. I'm looking for things that everyone will agree don't/didn't work already, so that I can, by analogy, dissuade people from currently-popular ideas like "cut taxes on the rich" or "burn it all down" or whatever other folly is current.
So, the war on drugs is on the right track, since it started in the past and clearly hasn't worked -- a perfect example would be 95% non-controversial, though, and probably not political.
So, maybe "use more perfume" as a solution to a bad smell, or something.
posted by amtho at 3:15 AM on October 15, 2019
I'd really love non-political, non-societal-issue examples.
I think I should be more specific, though. I'm looking for things that everyone will agree don't/didn't work already, so that I can, by analogy, dissuade people from currently-popular ideas like "cut taxes on the rich" or "burn it all down" or whatever other folly is current.
So, the war on drugs is on the right track, since it started in the past and clearly hasn't worked -- a perfect example would be 95% non-controversial, though, and probably not political.
So, maybe "use more perfume" as a solution to a bad smell, or something.
posted by amtho at 3:15 AM on October 15, 2019
"Ignore them and they'll stop bullying you" is definitely a good one!
posted by amtho at 3:15 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by amtho at 3:15 AM on October 15, 2019
Add more freeways.
posted by flabdablet at 3:16 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by flabdablet at 3:16 AM on October 15, 2019
"There's a great future in plastics" from The Graduate?
posted by SuperSquirrel at 3:40 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by SuperSquirrel at 3:40 AM on October 15, 2019
Prohibition
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 3:44 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 3:44 AM on October 15, 2019
"Peace for our time," declared by Chamberlain a year before WWII broke out.
posted by penguin pie at 3:49 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by penguin pie at 3:49 AM on October 15, 2019
Spare the rod and spoil the child.
posted by FencingGal at 3:51 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by FencingGal at 3:51 AM on October 15, 2019
"Leave your toxic job." There are many, many considerations to take into account before one leaves one's toxic job, e.g. commute, finances, career development etc.
posted by unicorn chaser at 3:54 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by unicorn chaser at 3:54 AM on October 15, 2019
Exercise
Get eight hours sleep.
Drink more water.
Therapy.
It doesn’t seem to matter what your problem is, people tell you to do these things.
posted by Jubey at 4:00 AM on October 15, 2019
Get eight hours sleep.
Drink more water.
Therapy.
It doesn’t seem to matter what your problem is, people tell you to do these things.
posted by Jubey at 4:00 AM on October 15, 2019
Just strap on some fake wings and jump off a cliff (to fly)
Let's just keep sailing West until we reach India
posted by peacheater at 4:04 AM on October 15, 2019
Let's just keep sailing West until we reach India
posted by peacheater at 4:04 AM on October 15, 2019
The more modern version of “spare the rod” is “What that child needs is a good spanking,” which has definitely been around during my lifetime. I can remember spanking “solving” the problem of a misbehaving child on TV in the 60s and 70s.
posted by FencingGal at 4:07 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by FencingGal at 4:07 AM on October 15, 2019
Put yogurt in your vagina to cure yeast infection. Or garlic.
posted by waving at 4:12 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by waving at 4:12 AM on October 15, 2019
Pivot to video.
posted by Metroid Baby at 4:16 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by Metroid Baby at 4:16 AM on October 15, 2019
THoUgHts aNd pRayERs
You familiar with the subreddit r/wowthanksimcured?
posted by phunniemee at 4:20 AM on October 15, 2019
You familiar with the subreddit r/wowthanksimcured?
posted by phunniemee at 4:20 AM on October 15, 2019
Fake it 'til you make it
posted by the long dark teatime of the soul at 4:37 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by the long dark teatime of the soul at 4:37 AM on October 15, 2019
"Look on the bright side." /"Think positive thoughts."
"Sleep when the baby sleeps."
"Hitting rock bottom."/"It's all up from here."
"Never go to bed angry."
"Depression is all in your head."
"We'll get you another [pet/beloved toy]."
"Tough it out" with regard to illness/major injury (I hear American football has some "great" examples if your audience would recognize them)/emotional distress
It may be "simple" to amputate a limb, but lots better to work hard to save it, if one is skilled enough to manage it. (I can think of other examples along those lines but they tread close to "death panels" territory.)
Putting developmentally delayed and/or disabled and/or neuroatypical children in institutions.
Companies whose products have high failure rates but instead of fixing the issue they just send out new ones to affected customers who think to ask, since the high rate is still low enough it's relatively unlikely the second one is also bad. ("Playing the odds" or "What are the odds?" is the pithy version I guess.)
posted by teremala at 4:58 AM on October 15, 2019
"Sleep when the baby sleeps."
"Hitting rock bottom."/"It's all up from here."
"Never go to bed angry."
"Depression is all in your head."
"We'll get you another [pet/beloved toy]."
"Tough it out" with regard to illness/major injury (I hear American football has some "great" examples if your audience would recognize them)/emotional distress
It may be "simple" to amputate a limb, but lots better to work hard to save it, if one is skilled enough to manage it. (I can think of other examples along those lines but they tread close to "death panels" territory.)
Putting developmentally delayed and/or disabled and/or neuroatypical children in institutions.
Companies whose products have high failure rates but instead of fixing the issue they just send out new ones to affected customers who think to ask, since the high rate is still low enough it's relatively unlikely the second one is also bad. ("Playing the odds" or "What are the odds?" is the pithy version I guess.)
posted by teremala at 4:58 AM on October 15, 2019
People will like you if you just ask them questions about themselves.
posted by Chenko at 5:02 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by Chenko at 5:02 AM on October 15, 2019
All bullies are cowards.
If you love some enough, they will change (insert negative aspect here).
posted by Calvin and the Duplicators at 5:17 AM on October 15, 2019
If you love some enough, they will change (insert negative aspect here).
posted by Calvin and the Duplicators at 5:17 AM on October 15, 2019
Just be yourself.
posted by panama joe at 5:20 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by panama joe at 5:20 AM on October 15, 2019
“I am not a crook.”
posted by Gilgamesh's Chauffeur at 5:52 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by Gilgamesh's Chauffeur at 5:52 AM on October 15, 2019
For optimal security, change your password every 3 months.
Seems simple, right? It was very common. But that advice is now officially wrong.
Most people have run into the annoyance of required periodic password changes. They'll be happy to know that in the future they can season that annoyance with smug superiority and hope that eventually this practice will completely die out.
posted by Winnie the Proust at 5:56 AM on October 15, 2019
Seems simple, right? It was very common. But that advice is now officially wrong.
Most people have run into the annoyance of required periodic password changes. They'll be happy to know that in the future they can season that annoyance with smug superiority and hope that eventually this practice will completely die out.
posted by Winnie the Proust at 5:56 AM on October 15, 2019
"Abstinence education prevents teen pregnancy."
The evidence against is pretty incontrovertible.
posted by freya_lamb at 6:19 AM on October 15, 2019
The evidence against is pretty incontrovertible.
posted by freya_lamb at 6:19 AM on October 15, 2019
Putting lead in gas offered better performance in car engines, but also poisoned the world. Switching to unleaded gas and using some engineering brainpower to make up for the lost power was a better solution.
Didn't they import camels to Australia to solve a transport shortage or something -- which didn't work but now "feral camels" are a thing? Hang on....*clickety-click* Yep, that is one looooong list! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Invasive_species_in_Australia (At least it gave us the "...and in the winter, the gorillas will freeze!" punchline.)
Last, don't forget Mencken's quote: "...there is always a well-known solution to every human problem — neat, plausible, and wrong."
posted by wenestvedt at 6:35 AM on October 15, 2019
Didn't they import camels to Australia to solve a transport shortage or something -- which didn't work but now "feral camels" are a thing? Hang on....*clickety-click* Yep, that is one looooong list! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Invasive_species_in_Australia (At least it gave us the "...and in the winter, the gorillas will freeze!" punchline.)
Last, don't forget Mencken's quote: "...there is always a well-known solution to every human problem — neat, plausible, and wrong."
posted by wenestvedt at 6:35 AM on October 15, 2019
Just put it in reverse.
Ask for a raise.
Good parenting will solve all this child's problems.
What we need is a leader.
You're not trying hard enough. Try harder. If you didn't succeed it's because you didn't care enough to succeed.
You'll feel better once you are married/have a child/get that raise/finish school etc.
It's up to the young to change the world.
Anyone can learn to drive.
You'd be much happier if you were more like me.
Anyone can write a novel.
If you're not having orgasms it's because he's a bad lover.
If you're not having orgasms it's because you're mentally messed up.
posted by Jane the Brown at 6:41 AM on October 15, 2019
Ask for a raise.
Good parenting will solve all this child's problems.
What we need is a leader.
You're not trying hard enough. Try harder. If you didn't succeed it's because you didn't care enough to succeed.
You'll feel better once you are married/have a child/get that raise/finish school etc.
It's up to the young to change the world.
Anyone can learn to drive.
You'd be much happier if you were more like me.
Anyone can write a novel.
If you're not having orgasms it's because he's a bad lover.
If you're not having orgasms it's because you're mentally messed up.
posted by Jane the Brown at 6:41 AM on October 15, 2019
If the project you're managing isn't going to finish on time, add more people.
posted by Homer42 at 6:49 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by Homer42 at 6:49 AM on October 15, 2019
Write your name on your food before you put it in the office refrigerator and no one will eat it.
If you dress sexy he will be attracted to you.
You won't get attacked if you dress modestly.
An apple a day...
Melatonin!
Anyone can exercise and lose weight.
Anyone can diet and lose weight.
Anyone can exercise.
This recipe is foolproof!
[Anything] is foolproof.
Ask an expert.
Ask your Mom.
Just squirt some antifreeze into the lock.
Any strategy to prevent rape
Any strategy to prevent bullying
Pesticide
Herbicide
Globalization
Free trade
De-regulation
Writing another regulation
Affirmative action
Feminism
Biological reductionism
Preventing forest fires
Municipal water treatment
posted by Jane the Brown at 6:50 AM on October 15, 2019
If you dress sexy he will be attracted to you.
You won't get attacked if you dress modestly.
An apple a day...
Melatonin!
Anyone can exercise and lose weight.
Anyone can diet and lose weight.
Anyone can exercise.
This recipe is foolproof!
[Anything] is foolproof.
Ask an expert.
Ask your Mom.
Just squirt some antifreeze into the lock.
Any strategy to prevent rape
Any strategy to prevent bullying
Pesticide
Herbicide
Globalization
Free trade
De-regulation
Writing another regulation
Affirmative action
Feminism
Biological reductionism
Preventing forest fires
Municipal water treatment
posted by Jane the Brown at 6:50 AM on October 15, 2019
To alter the amount of X in the body, change the amount of X consumed. I'm thinking of the case X = cholesterol, but I'm sure there are many others.
To prevent something, just make it illegal (or illegal-er).
posted by SemiSalt at 6:56 AM on October 15, 2019
To prevent something, just make it illegal (or illegal-er).
posted by SemiSalt at 6:56 AM on October 15, 2019
For meetings, having both an agenda and minutes in writing are a waste of time.
posted by Homer42 at 6:56 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by Homer42 at 6:56 AM on October 15, 2019
Ignore them and they'll stop bullying you.
Also, "Fight back and they'll stop bullying you."
posted by escabeche at 6:59 AM on October 15, 2019
Also, "Fight back and they'll stop bullying you."
posted by escabeche at 6:59 AM on October 15, 2019
Back in 1935, cane toads were introduced to Australia in a (severely misguided) effort at controlling pests that were eating sugar cane. It didn't work.
posted by JD Sockinger at 7:07 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by JD Sockinger at 7:07 AM on October 15, 2019
Do what you love and the money will follow.
posted by Enid Lareg at 7:16 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by Enid Lareg at 7:16 AM on October 15, 2019
If you are putting on a large rock concert, find some Hells Angels, and put them in charge of security.
posted by JD Sockinger at 7:25 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by JD Sockinger at 7:25 AM on October 15, 2019
The search for "overly simple ideas that failed" is overly simple. We see, in hindsight, that they failed, and so judge them overly simple.
In practice, people will disagree on whether we could have seen it coming, or even if a particular idea failed, or "was failed" (because it was implemented incorrectly, or we didn't give it time, or we didn't do this other obviously necessary thing).
posted by alittleknowledge at 7:55 AM on October 15, 2019
In practice, people will disagree on whether we could have seen it coming, or even if a particular idea failed, or "was failed" (because it was implemented incorrectly, or we didn't give it time, or we didn't do this other obviously necessary thing).
posted by alittleknowledge at 7:55 AM on October 15, 2019
- Adding lanes or roads reduces traffic.
- There was that example in Freakonomics (though maybe it's been discredited like much else in the book) about the daycare school where the simple solution of making parents who were late to pick up their kids pay a fine actually increased lateness, because human psychology isn't so simple.
- If by any chance you're talking to engineers, especially software engineers: when a project needs to be finished faster, (don't) just add more people to work on it.
- On a similar note: double the quantity doesn't necessarily mean double the baking time.
posted by trig at 8:02 AM on October 15, 2019
- There was that example in Freakonomics (though maybe it's been discredited like much else in the book) about the daycare school where the simple solution of making parents who were late to pick up their kids pay a fine actually increased lateness, because human psychology isn't so simple.
- If by any chance you're talking to engineers, especially software engineers: when a project needs to be finished faster, (don't) just add more people to work on it.
- On a similar note: double the quantity doesn't necessarily mean double the baking time.
posted by trig at 8:02 AM on October 15, 2019
The low-fat version is healthier!
posted by helloimjennsco at 8:08 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by helloimjennsco at 8:08 AM on October 15, 2019
The SlateStarCodex blog has some excellent examples, though most of them are ones that are not easily reduced to a pithy 7-word summary.
posted by alex1965 at 8:29 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by alex1965 at 8:29 AM on October 15, 2019
Just google it.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 8:46 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 8:46 AM on October 15, 2019
The answer to the legit question from a rural american feral hog problem is not assault rifles but nor is it warfarin.
posted by emkelley at 9:45 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by emkelley at 9:45 AM on October 15, 2019
Everything happens for a reason.
posted by cooker girl at 10:49 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by cooker girl at 10:49 AM on October 15, 2019
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
posted by cooker girl at 10:50 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by cooker girl at 10:50 AM on October 15, 2019
Looking for a job? You should call them up/physically go there with a resume!
Basically any advice that starts off with “Why don’t you just...”
posted by Weeping_angel at 11:06 AM on October 15, 2019
Basically any advice that starts off with “Why don’t you just...”
posted by Weeping_angel at 11:06 AM on October 15, 2019
How about that time the Oregon DOT decided that the simplest way to get rid of a dead whale on the beach was to blow it up with dynamite?
posted by clawsoon at 11:09 AM on October 15, 2019
posted by clawsoon at 11:09 AM on October 15, 2019
Surprised no one said "Lean in" which maaaaaaybe worked for some white women but was terrible advice for basically everyone else.
Along those same lines, the idea that the police are there to help you and calling them is the solution for an out of control problem and will make the problem less-worse (again, maaaaaybe true for better off white people but almost universally less true for people in every other demographic especially young black men and people experiencing mental health crises)
posted by jessamyn at 11:18 AM on October 15, 2019
Along those same lines, the idea that the police are there to help you and calling them is the solution for an out of control problem and will make the problem less-worse (again, maaaaaybe true for better off white people but almost universally less true for people in every other demographic especially young black men and people experiencing mental health crises)
posted by jessamyn at 11:18 AM on October 15, 2019
Use a pencil.
Pencils may not have been the best choice anyway. The tips flaked and broke off, drifting in microgravity where they could potentially harm an astronaut or equipment. And pencils are flammable--a quality NASA wanted to avoid in onboard objects after the Apollo 1 fire.posted by Green With You at 11:21 AM on October 15, 2019
Basically any advice that starts off with “Why don’t you just...”
Maybe helpful to you 0P, within my circle “just" is considered a dirty word.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 12:12 PM on October 15, 2019
Maybe helpful to you 0P, within my circle “just" is considered a dirty word.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 12:12 PM on October 15, 2019
Would examples from toddler behaviour be useful? E.g. if another child has a toy you want, the simplest solution is to grab it and take it from them.
posted by clawsoon at 12:27 PM on October 15, 2019
posted by clawsoon at 12:27 PM on October 15, 2019
Stop enabling homeless people by giving them money.
Stop enabling addicts by giving away needles.
Make abortions illegal to prevent abortions.
An armed society is a polite society.
posted by subocoyne at 12:57 PM on October 15, 2019
Stop enabling addicts by giving away needles.
Make abortions illegal to prevent abortions.
An armed society is a polite society.
posted by subocoyne at 12:57 PM on October 15, 2019
Summer's Eve will make you a cleaner, better woman.
posted by tacodave at 5:16 PM on October 15, 2019
posted by tacodave at 5:16 PM on October 15, 2019
Robert McNamara's approach to the Vietnam War: If you kill more of the enemy than they kill of you, you'll win the war. It has been enshrined as the McNamara Fallacy.
posted by clawsoon at 5:28 PM on October 15, 2019
posted by clawsoon at 5:28 PM on October 15, 2019
Pivot to video.
posted by redfoxtail at 6:47 PM on October 15, 2019
posted by redfoxtail at 6:47 PM on October 15, 2019
Supporting counterproductive laws because it "sends a message".
posted by HiroProtagonist at 7:13 PM on October 15, 2019
posted by HiroProtagonist at 7:13 PM on October 15, 2019
> Spare the rod and spoil the child.
This one is a double-whammy. Modern reading of this is that it's a command to parents: don't hit your kids, but spoil them. The original reading of that phrase is a warning to parents: if you don't hit your kids, they'll be spoiled.
Spoiled kids are bad. Hitting kids is bad. That whole thing is just a cluster.
posted by Sunburnt at 10:44 PM on October 15, 2019
This one is a double-whammy. Modern reading of this is that it's a command to parents: don't hit your kids, but spoil them. The original reading of that phrase is a warning to parents: if you don't hit your kids, they'll be spoiled.
Spoiled kids are bad. Hitting kids is bad. That whole thing is just a cluster.
posted by Sunburnt at 10:44 PM on October 15, 2019
A disgruntled athlete will change suddenly to "our" system, so we should make the trade. (See Antonio Brown)
Trust the process.
What can go wrong? (Applied to DIY home remodel projects where professionals with years of experience will save you the troubles.)
Get a bigger hammer.
posted by brent at 9:40 AM on October 16, 2019
Trust the process.
What can go wrong? (Applied to DIY home remodel projects where professionals with years of experience will save you the troubles.)
Get a bigger hammer.
posted by brent at 9:40 AM on October 16, 2019
Conservatory teacher: "You'll have to re-learn your entire technique"
posted by Namlit at 1:08 PM on October 16, 2019
posted by Namlit at 1:08 PM on October 16, 2019
Regarding modern art: "My five year old could do that!"
posted by Vervain at 6:57 AM on October 18, 2019
posted by Vervain at 6:57 AM on October 18, 2019
"My five year old could do that!"
Or, the long read:
"Those pictures at your last exhibition, yeah I could imagine me doing one of those myself one day, but the drawings you did together with the kids yesterday, absolutely stunning, wouldn't know how to begin doing any of it."*
* This is authentic, not made up.
posted by Namlit at 7:17 AM on October 18, 2019
Or, the long read:
"Those pictures at your last exhibition, yeah I could imagine me doing one of those myself one day, but the drawings you did together with the kids yesterday, absolutely stunning, wouldn't know how to begin doing any of it."*
* This is authentic, not made up.
posted by Namlit at 7:17 AM on October 18, 2019
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by cadge at 1:48 AM on October 15, 2019