How does calling emotional/romantic dibs work, exactly?
March 31, 2019 2:33 PM Subscribe
Can a married person make emotional claims on a third party they have feelings for but cannot have and expect their single friends to therefore not have a relationship with this third party?
This post was deleted for the following reason: This is framed so coyly as to be chatfilter. -- restless_nomad
What? No. Put on your big girl / boy panties and get on with it.
posted by St. Peepsburg at 2:36 PM on March 31, 2019
posted by St. Peepsburg at 2:36 PM on March 31, 2019
No, that’s really weird.
posted by brilliantine at 2:38 PM on March 31, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by brilliantine at 2:38 PM on March 31, 2019 [1 favorite]
Can they? Sure! Is it a sensible thing to do? Absolutely not! Should the single friend respect this nuttiness? Also no! Is the whole scenario likely to engender a really atrocious amount of drama? Undoubtedly!
posted by merriment at 2:38 PM on March 31, 2019 [4 favorites]
posted by merriment at 2:38 PM on March 31, 2019 [4 favorites]
No. That goes for single people, too. The idea of calling dibs on another person is really gross, regardless of your marital status.
posted by basalganglia at 2:41 PM on March 31, 2019 [6 favorites]
posted by basalganglia at 2:41 PM on March 31, 2019 [6 favorites]
They can make the claims but they will not hold. Demands aside, if I had a dear friend who had a serious crush going on, short of love I don't think I would enter the scenario.
posted by InkaLomax at 2:41 PM on March 31, 2019
posted by InkaLomax at 2:41 PM on March 31, 2019
So the idea is, I can't date our mutual friend J because you have a crush on J and would totally get together with them if you weren't already married which you are? Um... no.
posted by Flannery Culp at 2:43 PM on March 31, 2019
posted by Flannery Culp at 2:43 PM on March 31, 2019
No.
Also, if I were the third party in question and found out this was even being entertained, those relationships would be over for me.
posted by jameaterblues at 2:43 PM on March 31, 2019 [2 favorites]
Also, if I were the third party in question and found out this was even being entertained, those relationships would be over for me.
posted by jameaterblues at 2:43 PM on March 31, 2019 [2 favorites]
How does it work?
Badly.
How does it end?
Badly.
If a friend tried this on me, I'd really wonder about both their marriage and their grip on reality.
posted by Calvin and the Duplicators at 2:44 PM on March 31, 2019
Badly.
How does it end?
Badly.
If a friend tried this on me, I'd really wonder about both their marriage and their grip on reality.
posted by Calvin and the Duplicators at 2:44 PM on March 31, 2019
Unless there is some mitigating circumstance to this question, the answer is, pretty obviously, no. Or, as people have said above, you can try, but it's not reasonable to expect people to accommodate.
posted by jessamyn at 2:48 PM on March 31, 2019
posted by jessamyn at 2:48 PM on March 31, 2019
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posted by shaademaan at 2:35 PM on March 31, 2019