Dating a New Person That's Making Me Feel Uncomfortable [Update]
June 26, 2017 5:56 PM Subscribe
I'm updating everyone with what happened in my previous post: http://ask.metafilter.com/310398/Dating-a-New-Person-Thats-Making-Me-Feel-Uncomfortable
I understand I caught some flack for this post, but I would like to clarify a few things.
1) It was her ignoring my wishes that made me uncomfortable.
2) The first thing that made me deeply uncomfortable were the previous albums of her past boyfriends on Facebook. In addition to this, she wasn't in any of the photos. Not only that the past three albums she had on Facebook were of past boyfriends.
3) With that in mind, I went on the second date with her. She took me to the exact same place she took her past boyfriend to. While there, she had everything planned out, and asked me to stand and do things as she took photos of me -- this made me very, very uncomfortable.
4) The weight thing. Being overweight isn't a deal breaker for me. She wasn't grossly overweight, but her being insecure about it and making comments about it put me off. I went from excited to having met her, to put off. It felt as if I was a consolation prize instead of someone she really would like to be with were she in shape.
5) I'm not attractive (bland face and skinny), but I've at least been able to date average/pretty/plain people with great personalities. If she had a lovely personality and was upbeat, I would still be dating her. Everything about seeing her felt "off" to me, and made me feel uncomfortable.
Ultimately, I broke up with her (we only went on two dates after all) via Facebook. I told her the chemistry wasn't there, and that I wished her all the best. She never replied, I just got a "read acknowledgement" message. I've since deleted her from FB, and I'm not bothering with dating for a while. My feelings for my ex-gf (we broke up almost 4 months ago) are still raw.
I understand I caught some flack for this post, but I would like to clarify a few things.
1) It was her ignoring my wishes that made me uncomfortable.
2) The first thing that made me deeply uncomfortable were the previous albums of her past boyfriends on Facebook. In addition to this, she wasn't in any of the photos. Not only that the past three albums she had on Facebook were of past boyfriends.
3) With that in mind, I went on the second date with her. She took me to the exact same place she took her past boyfriend to. While there, she had everything planned out, and asked me to stand and do things as she took photos of me -- this made me very, very uncomfortable.
4) The weight thing. Being overweight isn't a deal breaker for me. She wasn't grossly overweight, but her being insecure about it and making comments about it put me off. I went from excited to having met her, to put off. It felt as if I was a consolation prize instead of someone she really would like to be with were she in shape.
5) I'm not attractive (bland face and skinny), but I've at least been able to date average/pretty/plain people with great personalities. If she had a lovely personality and was upbeat, I would still be dating her. Everything about seeing her felt "off" to me, and made me feel uncomfortable.
Ultimately, I broke up with her (we only went on two dates after all) via Facebook. I told her the chemistry wasn't there, and that I wished her all the best. She never replied, I just got a "read acknowledgement" message. I've since deleted her from FB, and I'm not bothering with dating for a while. My feelings for my ex-gf (we broke up almost 4 months ago) are still raw.
This post was deleted for the following reason: Just put the update in a comment in the original post. AskMe doesn't do new posts for updates. -- LobsterMitten
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