Help me to let go of these feelings
May 9, 2017 2:38 AM Subscribe
I broke up with my ex 7 months ago and I want to know how to stop thinking about her all the time and finally let go.
It was an on and off relationship and she broke up with me a number of times for various reasons, but ultimately probably because she didn't have strong feelings for me.
I haven't spoken to her in 7 months and stuck to the whole no contact thing, but I still don't feel like I'm at the stage of acceptance that this relationship is finally over, probably because in the past she has got back in touch and because I still have strong feelings for her.
I constantly think of her and the relationship still and spend a lot of time visiting relationship and break up websites, at first to gain perspective but now I feel like they are acting as an emotional crutch which may be unhealthy for me as it's keeping me anchored in break up mode.
I'm doing a lot of things which I feel should help me such as keeping fit, giving up alcohol and dating, though I'm not sure if I'm ready.
Although I still love her I know on some level that she doesn't have those feelings for me and that I should leave it all behind, but I don't seem to be able to make that final push and she intrudes on my thoughts all the time. It feels like it's taking me too long to get over this and I'm still hurting. I probably should see a counsellor but to be honest I can't afford that so any helpful advice would be much appreciated. I've written about this before but I think I'd like a fresh perspective on this, perhaps from people who have been through similar. A new thing that has started which hadn't happened before is that
I've also kind of developed a compulsive habit for constantly checking my smartphone, such as checking dating apps, social media and stuff related to break ups. Is it possible that this is a trigger for my constant ruminating about her and our relationship?
It was an on and off relationship and she broke up with me a number of times for various reasons, but ultimately probably because she didn't have strong feelings for me.
I haven't spoken to her in 7 months and stuck to the whole no contact thing, but I still don't feel like I'm at the stage of acceptance that this relationship is finally over, probably because in the past she has got back in touch and because I still have strong feelings for her.
I constantly think of her and the relationship still and spend a lot of time visiting relationship and break up websites, at first to gain perspective but now I feel like they are acting as an emotional crutch which may be unhealthy for me as it's keeping me anchored in break up mode.
I'm doing a lot of things which I feel should help me such as keeping fit, giving up alcohol and dating, though I'm not sure if I'm ready.
Although I still love her I know on some level that she doesn't have those feelings for me and that I should leave it all behind, but I don't seem to be able to make that final push and she intrudes on my thoughts all the time. It feels like it's taking me too long to get over this and I'm still hurting. I probably should see a counsellor but to be honest I can't afford that so any helpful advice would be much appreciated. I've written about this before but I think I'd like a fresh perspective on this, perhaps from people who have been through similar. A new thing that has started which hadn't happened before is that
I've also kind of developed a compulsive habit for constantly checking my smartphone, such as checking dating apps, social media and stuff related to break ups. Is it possible that this is a trigger for my constant ruminating about her and our relationship?
This post was deleted for the following reason: As we've said before, many times, you cannot keep asking about this same problem -- taz
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