Flying with Children - Questions!

March 28, 2017 6:22 PM

I am going to be flying with the three small McGees for the first time ever in a few weeks. I have some questions! Nano McGee is flying as a lap baby -- should I gate-check an umbrella stroller for her and then rent a car seat at the destination? Help me with logistics! For the elementary-aged McGees (7 and 5, one with special needs), can they go through security holding a parent's hand? I want to be at the airport early enough to make the flight but not SO early my kids lose their minds with boredom -- how early? More details within.

We will be flying PIA to CLT, and then back. PIA is teeeeeeny, with free parking, 8 gates, and maybe 2 dozen passenger flights a day (more FedEx and UPS). CLT is rather large (but not O'Hare-large as I understand). I'll be carrying Xeroxes of their birth certificates.

We have not yet arranged ground transit on the far end and are open to suggestions -- in play right now are renting a car + carseats, purchasing car seats and having grandparents pick us up, or some combination of the two.

The plane both ways is a Bombardier CRJ-200, and we'll be sitting 2 in front and 2 behind (with the kickier child behind, to kick relatives rather than strangers), on the right side of the plane because apparently that is a rule with lap babies. All checked luggage has a fee and apparently carryons are smaller than on big jets like 747s. (We'll check one or two suitcases, carry on the diaper bag, a backpack with each elementary school child, my purse, and probably dad's messenger bag.)

The flight is only about 2 hours each way and they will have kindles although no wifi.

posted by Eyebrows McGee to Travel & Transportation (31 answers total)

Best answer: I've found renting a car seat to be very unreliable...both I and friends have turned up at rental counters with confirmed reservations only to have no seats available, no understanding that infant and toddler seats are not the same, seats that are dirty or with broken parts. If you are visiting grandparents I would opt to purchase something there and potentially reuse it on a future trip. You can get fairly inexpensive seats that aren't as great as a seat you'd want every day in your car but are fine for a short trip. Buy the seats, have grandparents meet you there and pick you up, it'll be soooo much easier. Good luck, you guys will do great!!
posted by handful of rain at 6:26 PM on March 28, 2017 [4 favorites]

I live in CLT and could put out a call in some local FB groups to see if we could find car seats for you to borrow. (Possible complication - I am out of town myself April 6-17.) MeMail me if you want to discuss!
posted by Sweetie Darling at 6:30 PM on March 28, 2017 [2 favorites]

I wouldn't worry too much about the birth certificates - I've flown a lot with my daughter and have never been asked for one.

The first trip to the grandparents', we found a local babygear rental place that does drop off and pickup and rented an appropriate car seat for my parents' car. These companies exist around most major cities. Since then though, we just bought her same car seat on Amazon delivered to their house for her grandparents to keep and use during our visits and I think that was definitely the right way to go.

Since my daughter started walking I've generally been told she has to walk through the metal detector by herself before I go through, but I'm sure if you mention your child's special needs they'll be able to accommodate you somehow. I would say call someone in advance to find out what the deal will be, but I have the feeling this is the sort of thing that you'll get conflicting info about since the TSA can kind of do whatever they want, so I'd maybe just come with as much a sense of zen as possible, a doctor's note about your child's needs if relevant, and prep your child as much as possible for what's going to happen. Maybe practice at home, substituting a doorframe for the metal detector, if that might work.

I generally never show up at an airport (including big places like Heathrow and SFO) more than an hour in advance, even with my kid and lots of luggage in tow, but I'm not familiar with your specific airports or your comfort with flying (I fly a lot) so YMMV.
posted by olinerd at 6:42 PM on March 28, 2017 [1 favorite]

You can check a baby car seat for free. The kids will need to go through the metal detector/X-ray machine by themselves, if possible (both 5 and 7 year old should be fine to do this, even with special needs). If one parent goes through first, you can direct the kids to follow when ready.
posted by Huffy Puffy at 6:50 PM on March 28, 2017

Check car seats, definitely gate check the stroller.
posted by sulaine at 6:51 PM on March 28, 2017 [1 favorite]

I have 2 of these but haven't used them yet as my kids aren't big enough but your older kids probably are. 40 smackers on Amazon.
posted by Seboshin at 6:53 PM on March 28, 2017 [2 favorites]

Is Nano McGee in a convertible car seat? We've transported those through the airport before by bungee cording them to the umbrella stroller, then wheeling kid (buckled in car seat attached to said stroller) through the air port and gate checking seat and stroller. If Nano is still in an infant seat, you could get a snap n go frame on Craigslist or wherevs for transporting the seat through the airport. Renting a car seat from the car rental place would be a last resort, I wouldn't trust them to have safe unexpired inventory.
posted by Wavelet at 6:54 PM on March 28, 2017

I had what felt like one of the more detailed conversational pre-screenings with a TSA agent at PIA, so don't figure that it's gonna be too easy. Also, if your flight coincides with one of the 2 or so daily 150+ pax Allegiant flights vs the usual 50 seat connector flights, that single security point gets pretty hectic.
posted by hwyengr at 6:55 PM on March 28, 2017

Gate check stroller(s). And this is a miracle for moving a car seat and child through an airport.
posted by anya32 at 7:03 PM on March 28, 2017 [2 favorites]

Is it possible to baby wear Nano McGee? I recently traveled solo cross-country with my 6 month old as a lap infant and the carrier (Lillebaby Air) was a godsend. Hands free to do other stuff, calming for my baby. I took him out for take-off and landing, but for a large portion of the flight he slept in the carrier. I went with the carrier in front and a backpack (acting as diaper bag) on my back, went under the seat so no having to deal with putting stuff overhead.

I checked carseat (in padded bag) and stroller (snap'n'go, no bag) at the ticket counter.
posted by permiechickie at 7:04 PM on March 28, 2017

I have traveled with my 3 who at the time were 1,2, and 3. I find it worse traveling with them when they were 13,14 and 15 but that is for another thread. We found that having our own car seats was actually the way to go. It turns out that for the little one, we gate checked the car seat with a stroller that converted to a car seat carrier thing. We felt that being able to restrain them or rather hold them without having to hold them was more efficient and easier. The first time we traveled, it was the logisitics of moving a small army. Car seats, stroller, pack and play, bags of diapers etc. But every time after we had it down pat. We cut down on some luggage by just buying diapers and OTC medicines and other incidentals when we got there. A quick trip to the CVS took car of it and the kids got a small bean bag type toy out if it for being such good travelers. (Not)

The other thing I have done with my golf clubs and I know folks who do it with car seats and skis, is ship it ahead via FedEx or some other courier service. Shipping a pack and play and car seat is cheaper than buying, the kids get the ones they are used to which was an issue for one of ours, and it wasn't some unknown gross used thing. Ship your clothes bag too just leave a change of clothes for everyone in one carry on.
posted by AugustWest at 7:11 PM on March 28, 2017

Best answer: They're not too fussy about what happens to elementary aged kids in pre-screen. I was pulled aside exiting a metal detector at YYZ and given pat down when my daughter was about 7 with no warning. I'm lucky she didn't wander off. It was a little scary.

Brief your older children on security procedures in advance, make sure they know to wait and stay in sight. They walk alone through the metal detector.
posted by crazycanuck at 7:13 PM on March 28, 2017

Best answer: TSA website now says "children will be not be separated from their parent/guardian. I believe that you can go through the x-ray machines hand-in-hand (not the new style scanners). It is a newish policy - I remember the press in the special needs community when it was announced - and I couldn't find it documented in a quick search.
posted by metahawk at 7:29 PM on March 28, 2017

Best answer: Your older kids are going to have so much fun!
My suggestions:
1. Check all car seats and booster seats. It should be free. You can buy car seat bags for very little. We always put the car seat in the bag and then jam in a bunch of diapers and small duffle bag of baby clothes (saves us the cost of another checked bag!). Alternately, Cosco Seneca car seats are inexpensive and well reviewed, so if you are going to visit your parents again soon, maybe have them buy one for the baby (or more depending on what the big kids use) and meet you at the airport.
2. A basic pack and play without the bells and whistles might be affordable for the grandparents to buy. Or if you can join a Facebook parents group local to that area, you might have luck borrowing one. I found one for my mom to buy on Craigslist.
3. Bring all of the snacks. Allllll the snacks. And empty water bottles to fill up after security.
4. I always bring a ton of toys and activities that my kids never use (because the novelty of the airport and plane is generally sufficient). My mantra is "don't plan for the two hour flight...plan for the two extra hour you are stuck sitting on the tarmac due to delays"

My kids are younger so I have no idea about going through security, but I bet you can find some you tube videos showing it so they get a sense of what it will look like. My daughter (last flew at 4) thought it was hysterical to take off her shoes at security.

Which reminds me:
5. Try to baby wear the baby. Generally you will just be able to walk through wearing Bebe. They will ask you to step to the side so they can run some cloth on your hands to test for something (explosive residue? I have no idea). But it's easy. I think for my just barely five year old we would probably bring the lighter junkiest stroller we could find, just so I could keep her contained while unloading the car, in various lines, etc. Even small airports can be big for little legs. And I want the flexibility to stick her in the stroller and run should there be a last minute gate change... stroller can be gate checked for no cost.
posted by avocado_of_merriment at 7:38 PM on March 28, 2017

I would not trust a car-seat rental. So either purchase car seats and have them sent to your parents ahead of your visit or bring your own. The one knock about bringing your own is that with 3 kids and all of your regular luggage, bringing two extra seats is a big hassle, but paying $10 for a porter is probably still cheaper than anything else. The advantage of bringing your own seats is that you will have a better idea of how to secure them properly (although I find that installing a seat in a new car is always more difficult than it ought to be).
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 7:53 PM on March 28, 2017

Response by poster: Grandparents have pack-and-play already and some toys and baby gates and can acquire other miscellaneous items (and will go buy diapers, puffs, etc., before we arrive -- we do this even when we visit Chicago, just so we have to schlep less); sounds like for the kids' boosters just having amazon ship a pair to the grandparents is the way to go. My kids are the oldest grandkids so boosters -- if not baby seats -- will be in use for years to come. We'll just have to sort the baby seat.

We can maaaaaaybe baby wear the baby. She doesn't like the sling and she's too heavy for ME in the baby bjorn, but my husband may still be able to wear her in the bjorn by then. (She's a pretty contented lap-sitter in general and I'll nurse her for the ears.)
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 8:08 PM on March 28, 2017

The Ride Safer Travel Vest might work for one or both of your older kids. There are also ways to turn suitcases into strollers, but they may not be suitable for your purposes.
posted by oceano at 8:12 PM on March 28, 2017

We wrapped up a little toy/thingy for every half-hour so the little one always had something new. Didn't really matter what it was. I have never gotten through a metal detector with my child but I don't have to use the scanner at least.
posted by kerf at 9:17 PM on March 28, 2017

Best answer: We have been asked for a birth certificate - I think it's more for proof of age for the lap child than anything else. A picture on a phone was good enough though, FYI.
posted by vunder at 10:10 PM on March 28, 2017

Best answer: I took a plane just two weeks ago with my 5 year old (somewhat special needs) boy and my 10 month baby. What we did and will probably do again in two weeks for another trip: take baby to airport on infant carseat and check that at the counter. Keep baby for as long as he can take it inside umbrella stroller, except for security check where you have to take baby out, close stroller and pass it through xray machine and carry baby across metal detector. I usually hold my 5 year old's hand up until when they motion him to go forward and I give him a little push then wait for my turn. It's usually just like 7 seconds where he's over there and I'm over here, to put it that way. He has not been asked to go through the weird full body machines but several time through metal detectors and it's been fine.
Take lots of those diaper baggies in case baby poops while on the plane. Double bag the diaper for everyone's noses sake. Bring toys for the baby but mostly just pray she falls asleep after takeoff. One or two extra pacifiers if she uses them. Airplane floors are yucky.
posted by CrazyLemonade at 10:27 PM on March 28, 2017 [1 favorite]

+1 you should only need the birth cert for the youngest if there's any possibility someone might think you're trying to pass off a kid over 2yo as a lap baby. Even then, most airlines are pretty lenient; I've heard Southwest isn't, though.
posted by potrzebie at 10:45 PM on March 28, 2017

Best answer: On the way back, I would give yourself TONS of time to get the family through security in CLT, especially if your flight home is on a weekend. Like, 2 hours minimum. It's become a cluster - the airport is basically the same as it was 20 years ago when I lived there and they've just tacked on extra/crowded/chaotic security areas. If you end up being too early, it just means more time for Bojangles!
posted by marmago at 11:49 PM on March 28, 2017 [1 favorite]

I will second CLT being a cluster right now, especially in March when every school system and university in the area is cycling through their spring break schedule. Give yourself plenty of time on that end. :)
posted by joycehealy at 5:50 AM on March 29, 2017

2nding the babywearing suggestion -- that has been the only way I've been able to travel with infants and toddlers and not loose my mind. Could you try more time in the carrier over the next few weeks to get baby more comfortable with it? Also, if the carrier isn't comfortable for you, have you tried other brands of carriers? (ergo and lillebaby could offer more support for you, the lumbar support with the lillebaby is amaaaaazing. Cheap Ergo carriers are easy to find on Craigslist) Even if you wear the baby, you can still use the stroller as a general stuff holder through the airport and then gate check it.

We've been super happy with the cheap cosco carseat if you decide to purchase and ship it out ahead of time.
posted by FamilyBand at 7:33 AM on March 29, 2017

You're right that those commuter jets can have MUCH smaller overhead compartments than full-size planes, which means they are a lot more aggressive about gate-checking. You don't want to lose your diaper bag, so I'd err on the conservative side when it comes to size of carryons.
posted by praemunire at 8:15 AM on March 29, 2017

Best answer: Not sure if you meant this is the first time flying with your kids, or just the first time flying with all of them, but in case it's the former... This coloring book goes through almost all the details of what to expect (not as much about how security works nowadays), plus you can color in it on the plane. Crayola makes triangular washable crayons, which have the extra benefit that they won't roll off the tray table.

I have found that if you pick your kid up when all your stuff is on the conveyor belt and before going through the metal detector, they will often let you carry them through. It only stopped working this year (and he was 7 years old).
posted by Mchelly at 9:31 AM on March 29, 2017

You absolutely should not rent a seat - good instincts, there. Any checked seats should be stored in their original packaging to prevent damage. The 7 month old will need his or her own seat on the plane and restraint device to fly safely, so that's one less seat to check.

This is a good reference if you're interested in car seat safety best practices when it comes to flying: Leaving On a Jet Plane
posted by pecanpies at 1:44 PM on March 29, 2017

Best answer: I've flown several times with my daughter, mostly as a lap baby but once in her own seat. We bought this lightweight Evenflo convertible carseat just for travel - it's much easier to carry than our everyday one, and cheap enough that if it gets damaged when checked it's not a big deal. It doesn't have any padding on the straps (but you can buy strap padding) and sometimes the straps get uneven in an annoying way, but it was an excellent purchase. I definitely recommend checking the carseat (free, as mentioned) if you bring it. It might make more sense to have the grandparents order it and keep it though - I bet it doesn't cost much more than renting one, and you'll know it's clean and undamaged.

We brought the baby's birth cert the first time we flew, but no one asked for it. She's been on maybe a dozen flights now (ugh), and no one has asked for one. They may or may not ask you to take her out of the carrier to go through the metal detector (you don't go through the body scanner naked machine thing if you are carrying a baby). They may let a parent walk through the metal detector with the kid, but from what I've seen with elementary aged kids traveling with two parents, they'll usually have one parent go through and stand right on the other side, then the kid walk through alone. The kid is then walking from one parent to the other parent, and is only alone for ~3 feet.

Good luck! I bet your boys will be delighted with the airplane, and hopefully the white noise and motion will put the baby to sleep.
posted by insectosaurus at 5:49 PM on March 29, 2017

If there is a possibility that the flight won't be completely full you can make nice with the boarding agents and see if they give you an extra seat for the carseat. If there aren't extra seats, you can then gatecheck the carseat. I've done this successfully several times -- it can really depend on the particular agent, and how pitiful you look.
posted by FamilyBand at 7:45 AM on March 30, 2017

Response by poster: We've gone ahead and shipped car seats to the grandparents, who will pick us up at the airport. (They haven't decided if they'll rent a minivan or come in two sedans, but they'll sort it.) They'll get lots of use over the next decade since my kids are the oldest grandkids and there are more on the way as we speak, so they can join the stash of baby goodies like the pack-n-play and the booster chair that live at grandma's.

I'll take paper xeroxes of the birth certificates anyway since it's no particular hassle, and we'll be sure to leave lots of extra time at CLT on the way home!
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 8:07 PM on March 31, 2017

Response by poster: So we're back! I still have three children! Due to last-minute schedule changes I ended up flying solo with all three kids on the way there, which was a little extra-exciting. Mr. McGee was able to come to the gate with us with a gate pass, so it wasn't too bad. TSA was very helpful at screening both ways and helped me keep my kids corralled. Both times we got to the airport about 90 minutes early and made it through screening pretty quickly so we had some airport lunch and watched the planes.

Shipping carseats to the grandparents was definitely the way to go; they picked up the rental car and met us with the car seats ready in the car. Flying with a lap baby is kind-of a pain in the ass and I'm not sure I'd want to do it on a flight much longer than 2 hours just because my arms got tired, but she was very good and easy and was able to nurse during take-off and landing.

The most harrowing part of the whole thing was in Charlotte we had to deplane down VERY STEEP STAIRS onto the tarmac and it was a little nerve wracking with the two kids going down, and then me and the baby while carrying two bags. Then we had to stand on the hot and noisy tarmac and wait for our stroller, and THEN walk quite a distance to the terminal (where we came in the very last gate in the very longest terminal, quite a hike). Otherwise everything went easily and smoothly and the kids were all champion fliers and stayed right with me in the airport. In PIA we touched down at 12:15 and were loaded up in the car by 12:25, despite being the last guys off the plane and having to get bags at gate check and baggage claim, so A+++ for speedy arrival in PIA!

Also I found out why lap babies are restricted to certain sections (in our case, the right side of the plane) -- those sections have an extra oxygen mask that drops out of the ceiling if necessary. The more you know!
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 11:23 AM on April 18, 2017 [1 favorite]