Buying presents for people you don't know very well
May 7, 2015 5:29 AM   Subscribe

What should I bring to an acquaintance's 30th birthday gathering? Details and complicating factors inside.

On Saturday I will be making an appearance at the 30th birthday gathering of an acquaintance. We don't know each other very well. I lived and worked on her parents' farm in rural Germany for a few months several years ago and she and a couple of her friends camped in my mother's backyard for a couple of weeks when she visited Australia after that. This will be the first time that I have seen her and her family in almost five years.

It's customary to bring a gift to social gatherings in Germany, and because it is her birthday I am even more determined not to turn up empty handed. The biggest complicating factor is that she grew up on an organic farm with a bakery and a shop. She's used to eating freshly baked bread, fairtrade chocolate, homemade jam, seasonal organic produce. My go-to things to bring would usually be chocolate or wine, but I feel like whatever I bring won't be good enough. But I can't afford to spend too much money on a gift, so some sort of food is probably the best option.

Any suggestions? Should I just buy a bottle of wine and stop overthinking it?
posted by kinddieserzeit to Human Relations (17 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
 
Buy a bottle of wine. Stop thinking about this.
posted by k8t at 5:39 AM on May 7, 2015 [21 favorites]


I agree with the wine. You're just an acquaintance; it's not so serious :)
posted by Sara_NOT_Sarah at 5:48 AM on May 7, 2015 [5 favorites]


What k8t said. Get a $10 bottle of red from Trader Joe's. Or a $6 bottle. Chances are the party guests will drink it, or it will be put aside and she won't even remember who brought it.
posted by zennie at 5:49 AM on May 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


It sounds like a bottle of wine would be fine, but if you want to go with something different, maybe take a really good olive oil and/or flavored vinegar? There should be some options at high-end grocery stores, or you could check out Oil & Vinegar if you'll be near one.
posted by neushoorn at 5:49 AM on May 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


I had several new-ish work colleagues at my 30th a few months ago. Some of them brought me bourbon. They are my new favorite work colleagues. (Which is to say: liquor is a nice change from the standard wine, and easier to choose.)
posted by supercres at 5:58 AM on May 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


Bottle of wine is fine. You could also get flowers or a potted plant.
posted by blnkfrnk at 5:58 AM on May 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


A box of good chocolates, local if possible.
posted by waving at 6:09 AM on May 7, 2015


Best answer: organic wine might be a nice touch
posted by runincircles at 6:16 AM on May 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


Bring flowers, or a gorgeous orchid plant.
posted by shazzam! at 6:22 AM on May 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Take something Australian. Each box ticked.
posted by taff at 7:00 AM on May 7, 2015


Response by poster: Thanks for your advice, everyone. I will look for a decent bottle of wine that I would happily drink with her if it is opened - but also happy to not drink if it doesn't - and not think about it anymore.

taff, I wish I could take something Australian but I didn't bring anything with me and I'm in a very small city with nothing in the way of Australian goods available.
posted by kinddieserzeit at 7:05 AM on May 7, 2015


Response by poster: And to those who suggested potted plants, especially an orchid: I love the idea. I might not get one for my acquaintance this time, but I'm kind of tempted to get one for myself...
posted by kinddieserzeit at 7:12 AM on May 7, 2015


If you wanted something a little different, you could gift her a nice tool for use with her farm goods, like maybe a stone motar and pestle set for grinding her own herbs or something along those lines.
posted by WeekendJen at 7:46 AM on May 7, 2015


Flowers in any odd number except 13 and not red roses.
posted by brujita at 9:23 AM on May 7, 2015


I agree with the chocolate - for someone used to nicer chocolates, something small and pretty will be preferable to a big thing anyway. If there's a specialty shop near you, that'd be good. (I have no idea where you are or where this person is, so if you're in a boring suburb or something, disregard this and stick to wine)
posted by maryr at 9:27 AM on May 7, 2015


If you want to take it up a notch, wrap the bottle in something like this, or this, or this, or this I find great scarves and shirts in thrift stores if there is one nearby (not sure how that works in Germany). I think there are tea towels everywhere, too bad you don't have an Austrailian one.
posted by BoscosMom at 12:36 PM on May 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Response by poster: An update: I ended up finding a bottle of "sparkling wine meets elderflower syrup" in an organic grocery store. It might not be to her taste, but at least it's something a bit different. I'd rather she not like it because of the elderflower, than buy the "wrong" (ie. not sweet enough) type of red wine or something.
posted by kinddieserzeit at 1:19 PM on May 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


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