Is my life FUBAR?
September 4, 2012 12:44 PM Subscribe
I've done absolutely nothing since graduating college in May 2011 due to social anxiety and other issues. The months seem to go by quicker and quicker. What should I do? I apologize in advance that my question is not that well organized.
posted by theshire to Work & Money (18 answers total) 20 users marked this as a favorite
I graduated with a business degree from a very good school last year. Due to an early graduation and a misunderstanding on my part, I completely missed on-campus recruiting. I don't know whether I would have gotten a job if that hadn't happened, but I knew I had no chance of getting a job on my own. I have had social anxiety my entire life: the last time I had a friend was the 4th grade, I get intimidated by people very easily, and I never have anything to say. I had only one, worthless internship junior year. In high school, I forged my volunteering timesheet because I couldn't even find someplace to volunteer for the required number of hours.
College, and school in general, was a horrible, lonely experience for me. I thought if I spent a semester abroad, I would have to make friends. Boy, was I wrong. Ironically, my only strength is academics, and I hate it. I had no interest in my major, nor in any other major. The idea that some people can actually like a class is unfathomable to me. I probably would have been better off working at McDonald's after high school, so that maybe I would have gained some confidence and experience.
I tried applying for jobs many months ago, but I never heard back from anyone. I realized that I have no career interests whatsoever, every job description I read sounded horrible, and that I am terrible at interviews. How would I explain my work gap, and how would I answer questions like "Tell me about yourself?" or "Give me an example of when ...?" or "What are your interests?" if I have nothing to tell, no examples to give, and no career goals? This all drives me into a depression which only leaves when I just stop thinking about getting a job.
I really have no idea what to do. I feel no motivation to apply for any job. The fear of an unexpected phone call from an employer causes me so much stress, and I have no confidence in my ability to actually perform any job. My internship showed me that I can't properly interact with a boss or coworkers and I just end up being seen as the weird, quiet person. My school was heavily focused on group projects. I can't even bear to think about those endless team meetings and emails, and isn't that basically what any office work revolves around?
My anxiety has been amplified by the fear of being asked what I've been up to. I avoid going to certain doctors if I know they'll ask me this.
I've tried applying for minimum wage jobs, but I get no response because they probably think I'm overqualified (if only they knew). And every time I apply I feel depressed to think that If it weren't for my social anxiety, I'd be making 60-100k like the rest of my peers. Not to mention my family thinks I could waltz into a good job if I wanted to, and that I just choose not to.
I just don't know how I will ever get a job, and if I get a job, how I will ever succeed in one. The only positive thing I can say is thank God I have no college loans, or I would be so royally you-know-what. Any advice other than see a therapist?