Why was he rude to me
May 24, 2012 11:12 PM   Subscribe

For a couple of years I had a crush on someone. They know it. There is an attraction their..At the moment nothing more. So lately when we meet in social situations (infrequently) we end up talking to each other. Before that he used to ignore me even though if we were alone (not that alone) he would talk to me. Last night I was talking to him within a (and another person) and I was generally getting bored & looking around but was not behaving (according to other people) - rudely. Things to Note - we were part of a larger group & he his married (I know the issues here but looking for advice anyway) Anyway I caught the end of his sentence which ended with the word serendipity - it caught my attention. I looked at him. He then said you know what serendipity means.. I think in a rude way..... I turned to away him and said Yes but tonight I am easily distracted. For some reason this has really annoyed me. Why would he suddenly be so rude .. really not his normal behaviour. I understand that no one can read minds.. but I am at loss for this public act of rudeness. It caught me off guard and I felt embarrassed. Please help find a reasonable explanation.
posted by nassep to Human Relations (3 answers total)

This post was deleted for the following reason: Hey, sorry, but you're correct that we can't read minds, and this just doesn't look like something we can answer. We can't divine someone's feelings from a tiny snippet of conversation that annoyed you. (Also, please try to be more careful with the construction of your posts; errors don't help efforts to try to make sense of the problem.) -- taz

 
I hate to say it, but to me it's clear that he is just not into you and I don't think there was never anything there to begin with. I'm so sorry. :( I don't think you should associate with this person anymore because he's never going to be able to give you what you need -- a meaningful and self-sustaining interpersonal relationship with someone who is actually available. Go forth -- and leave this person out of your life from now on.
posted by These Birds of a Feather at 11:15 PM on May 24, 2012


I read this question three times and I still don't understand what transpired that seems so incredibly rude to you. You were talking in a group, you were zoning in and out, you caught the last word in his sentence, and he said something that might have sounded snippy? That's it?

Either my reading comprehension needs some work or you're making a big deal out of nothing.
posted by jesourie at 11:37 PM on May 24, 2012 [1 favorite]


I would agree with These Birds that this married person is probably not really interested in you (sorry), but more than that, is it possible your interest in him has led you to over-interpret what are likely meaningless actions on his part? From your question it isn't clear what he's done that was all that rude ... I hope this doesn't come across as harsh - it isn't meant as such - but from my Stranger On the Internet perspective it sounds like you think he's putting a lot more deliberation into his interactions with you than he really is. Maybe try to work on redirecting your focus elsewhere for a while?
posted by DingoMutt at 11:37 PM on May 24, 2012


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