What did your therapist do that was just terrific?

December 1, 2011 9:12 PM

What did your therapist do that was just terrific?

I'm wondering if people have specific thoughts about what they've LOVED that their therapists have done. It goes without saying: good listener, wasn't judgmental, genuinely cared, etc. I'm sort of thinking about things that wouldn't go without saying. For me, my favorite therapist of all time used to make me lose it laughing about future scenarios that made me anxious, and it helped them lose their power. A friend of mine says she loves it when her therapist gives her articles she thinks are relevant to her situation because it means to her that her therapist is thinking about her between sessions. Another friend said it meant a lot to him that his therapist remembered his anniversary a year after he'd casually mentioned it, and wished him a happy anniversary.

Do you have anything like this - big or small - that really meant a lot to you, or made a bigger difference in your treatment than you would have predicted?

Not sure how many answers this will get, but it will be interesting.

posted by namesarehard to Human Relations (4 answers total)

I think this is so personal and specific to each person, so it's hard to answer...but one thing I liked about my therapist at first was that he would never "label" me with any negative traits, which the other therapists I had previously tried had done.

ex: Previous therapist: "Sounds like you're a very jealous person. Why do you think that is?"

Current therapist: " Yes, that's kind of a jealous impulse." And then we'd talk about why I might be jealous about that one specific situation, rather than me having to defend, like, an entire, immutable personality trait and discuss why I may or may not have it.
posted by sweetkid at 9:19 PM on December 1, 2011

My problem was some seriously negative thinking patterns, and what my therapist would do was to basically listen to my overblown rants without comment, let me exhaust my store of hyperbole and wind myself down, and then, when I was already starting to feel slightly silly about what I'd said, he would point out ways in which I'd contradicted myself or said something that clearly didn't sync with reality. Rather than try to convince Ranting Me, he'd wait for me to get in a space where I'd be more receptive to what he was saying.

He also referred to us as being on a team, 'in this together,' etc which was good for me.
posted by showbiz_liz at 9:23 PM on December 1, 2011

My therapist brings her pug to sessions.
posted by xyzzy at 9:33 PM on December 1, 2011 [2 favorites]

Clear, agreed-upon outcomes, and a prescribed course of written exercises, bibliotherapy, structured journaling and a time limit after which progress was to be assessed and therapy terminated, if appropriate (it was). I'd had other previous experiences with warm fuzzy therapists in which I loved this or that about them personally and enjoyed the things they said or did, but none compared with that focused effort aimed at solving the problem that I presented with. That was over 20 years ago and I still am living the benefits.
posted by Wordwoman at 9:37 PM on December 1, 2011 [1 favorite]