Hey Bob, I was really hoping you'd have a few minutes to tell me exactly how this sorting algorithm should work...
June 16, 2011 6:21 PM Subscribe
How do I deal with my micromanaging boss? Is there anything I can do or say to get him to unclench his bear-trap-like sphincter? Or should I just start looking for a new job?
I work at a Web marketing firm of about 20 employees. The boss in question is not actually my immediate supervisor, but one of the co-founders and co-owners of the company. (I'll call him Bob.)
On a personal level, I like him just fine. His management style, however, makes me want to throw myself out the window.
I like to describe him, with tongue-in-cheek understatement, as "very hands-on". He wants to be involved in every detail of everything the company does. He insists on being involved in it. (I read the Wikipedia article on micromanagement, and it's like they're describing my life.)
I've actually watched him stand behind our designers and tell them exactly where to put things, exactly what colors and fonts to use, exactly what kind of fades to use when editing videos, etc. Sometimes for hours at a stretch. Yesterday, he gave us a list of design tweaks which included specific point sizes for fonts.
We pay professional writers to produce copy for our sites. Then Bob edits them. Today, I was porting some copy into a site we're developing. (The copy had already been approved and signed off by the client, and the project is already a month behind schedule.) Bob stood behind me and dictated changes to the copy. He told me where to put each word and colon.
He once insisted that he knew what was causing a bug in my code, even though he had seen the page in question for all of thirty seconds and (by his own admission) has zero programming experience. He once told one of our designers what image format to use for a particular graphic (and it was the wrong format for the situation). Yesterday, he told the designer and I how to structure a particular CSS rule.
No one in the company makes any decision without asking Bob for direction. Whenever I ask another employee a question, it's always "that's a question for Bob", or "we'll have to see what Bob says", or "has anyone heard Bob's take on that?".
I feel like I have no agency—and I see the same thing in other employees. For the longest time, I thought the guy who draws up the wireframes was a slacker, because I never really saw him produce anything. Gradually, I've realized: he's learned the game. If he produces any original work, Bob will just come along and completely rearrange it anyway. So he just waits for Bob to come along and tell him what to draw. The end result is the same.
As if this wasn't bad enough, Bob completely bypasses the chain of command. Instead of coming to our project manager with changes, he comes directly to individual employees. As a result, our PM doesn't know what's going on with the project, or what her employees' schedules look like—and without that information, she can't manage the project. Bob manages the project, and our PM does her best to put out the fires he leaves in his wake. The right hand of the company never knows what the left is doing. Scheduling conflicts arise. Balls get dropped. Major project requirements don't get communicated to the production team (my department) until they were due yesterday. Employees sometimes have to work late nights and long hours to rescue poorly managed projects from the brink of disaster.
You know that saying, "work expands to fit the available time"? With Bob, the work expands to overflow the available time. Projects begin with a clear, defined scope, with the client's signed approval and an agreed-upon schedule. Then, over the course of the project, Bob scrutinizes every detail, and picks at it, and picks at it. Right up until launch, he'll find things to change and new requirements to add, whether they're needed or not. Then he tells us to change the changes (he manages to be both extremely controlling and extremely wishy-washy at the same time).
I don't think he feels like he's doing his job unless he's telling us to change things. He just makes this stuff up on the fly: he'll pull up a chair next to us, look at whatever we're working on, and find things to change. He acts like he's doing us a favor—like he's our mentor and we're eagerly awaiting his shrewd insights. His favorite thing to say before (finally) leaving us the hell alone is this: "Is there anything else you needed to talk through with me?" Like we asked him to sit at our desks and treat us like incompetent children.
Deep breath.
So, here's one idea I'm playing with. I know for a fact that I'm not the only one who sees these problems. In fact, folks seem to be getting increasingly frustrated with Bob's micromanagement. I've also never been shy about speaking my mind to authority figures. One coworker has already told me that if I were to write a letter of concern, she'd be willing to put her signature on it. (I've already raised some of these concerns with Bob in a less formal way.)
That got me wondering how many other folks would be willing to stand behind me—and I believe I could rustle up at least a few. The aim of the letter is not to be confrontational, or point fingers, or issue an ultimatum. I want Bob to see that these concerns aren't just grousing from a couple of difficult employees—that they are shared by folks throughout his company, in every department, at every level in the org chart. That the current status quo is hurting his company, eroding morale, and compromising the quality of our output. That we are talented professionals who are eager to lend our expertise to his cause, if he'll just let us.
If the worst comes to pass, and I get fired, I feel confident that I could find another job without too much difficulty. So assume that's not a concern.
The long-awaited questions:
1. In a best-case scenario, is this approach likely to do any good whatsoever?
2. If not, is there another approach you would suggest?
Sorry for the length. I should have been asleep two hours ago, but I've been tossing and turning over this nonsense. I'd really appreciate any perspective you can give. Thanks!
I work at a Web marketing firm of about 20 employees. The boss in question is not actually my immediate supervisor, but one of the co-founders and co-owners of the company. (I'll call him Bob.)
On a personal level, I like him just fine. His management style, however, makes me want to throw myself out the window.
I like to describe him, with tongue-in-cheek understatement, as "very hands-on". He wants to be involved in every detail of everything the company does. He insists on being involved in it. (I read the Wikipedia article on micromanagement, and it's like they're describing my life.)
I've actually watched him stand behind our designers and tell them exactly where to put things, exactly what colors and fonts to use, exactly what kind of fades to use when editing videos, etc. Sometimes for hours at a stretch. Yesterday, he gave us a list of design tweaks which included specific point sizes for fonts.
We pay professional writers to produce copy for our sites. Then Bob edits them. Today, I was porting some copy into a site we're developing. (The copy had already been approved and signed off by the client, and the project is already a month behind schedule.) Bob stood behind me and dictated changes to the copy. He told me where to put each word and colon.
He once insisted that he knew what was causing a bug in my code, even though he had seen the page in question for all of thirty seconds and (by his own admission) has zero programming experience. He once told one of our designers what image format to use for a particular graphic (and it was the wrong format for the situation). Yesterday, he told the designer and I how to structure a particular CSS rule.
No one in the company makes any decision without asking Bob for direction. Whenever I ask another employee a question, it's always "that's a question for Bob", or "we'll have to see what Bob says", or "has anyone heard Bob's take on that?".
I feel like I have no agency—and I see the same thing in other employees. For the longest time, I thought the guy who draws up the wireframes was a slacker, because I never really saw him produce anything. Gradually, I've realized: he's learned the game. If he produces any original work, Bob will just come along and completely rearrange it anyway. So he just waits for Bob to come along and tell him what to draw. The end result is the same.
As if this wasn't bad enough, Bob completely bypasses the chain of command. Instead of coming to our project manager with changes, he comes directly to individual employees. As a result, our PM doesn't know what's going on with the project, or what her employees' schedules look like—and without that information, she can't manage the project. Bob manages the project, and our PM does her best to put out the fires he leaves in his wake. The right hand of the company never knows what the left is doing. Scheduling conflicts arise. Balls get dropped. Major project requirements don't get communicated to the production team (my department) until they were due yesterday. Employees sometimes have to work late nights and long hours to rescue poorly managed projects from the brink of disaster.
You know that saying, "work expands to fit the available time"? With Bob, the work expands to overflow the available time. Projects begin with a clear, defined scope, with the client's signed approval and an agreed-upon schedule. Then, over the course of the project, Bob scrutinizes every detail, and picks at it, and picks at it. Right up until launch, he'll find things to change and new requirements to add, whether they're needed or not. Then he tells us to change the changes (he manages to be both extremely controlling and extremely wishy-washy at the same time).
I don't think he feels like he's doing his job unless he's telling us to change things. He just makes this stuff up on the fly: he'll pull up a chair next to us, look at whatever we're working on, and find things to change. He acts like he's doing us a favor—like he's our mentor and we're eagerly awaiting his shrewd insights. His favorite thing to say before (finally) leaving us the hell alone is this: "Is there anything else you needed to talk through with me?" Like we asked him to sit at our desks and treat us like incompetent children.
Deep breath.
So, here's one idea I'm playing with. I know for a fact that I'm not the only one who sees these problems. In fact, folks seem to be getting increasingly frustrated with Bob's micromanagement. I've also never been shy about speaking my mind to authority figures. One coworker has already told me that if I were to write a letter of concern, she'd be willing to put her signature on it. (I've already raised some of these concerns with Bob in a less formal way.)
That got me wondering how many other folks would be willing to stand behind me—and I believe I could rustle up at least a few. The aim of the letter is not to be confrontational, or point fingers, or issue an ultimatum. I want Bob to see that these concerns aren't just grousing from a couple of difficult employees—that they are shared by folks throughout his company, in every department, at every level in the org chart. That the current status quo is hurting his company, eroding morale, and compromising the quality of our output. That we are talented professionals who are eager to lend our expertise to his cause, if he'll just let us.
If the worst comes to pass, and I get fired, I feel confident that I could find another job without too much difficulty. So assume that's not a concern.
The long-awaited questions:
1. In a best-case scenario, is this approach likely to do any good whatsoever?
2. If not, is there another approach you would suggest?
Sorry for the length. I should have been asleep two hours ago, but I've been tossing and turning over this nonsense. I'd really appreciate any perspective you can give. Thanks!
Old dog, new tricks. Listen to kindall.
posted by flabdablet at 6:39 PM on June 16, 2011
posted by flabdablet at 6:39 PM on June 16, 2011
Are you really willing to be the fall guy for this? Move on.
posted by These Birds of a Feather at 6:40 PM on June 16, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by These Birds of a Feather at 6:40 PM on June 16, 2011 [1 favorite]
Bob completely bypasses the chain of command.
It's his company. He makes the rules. You're seriously thinking about rallying the troops to tell the guy who started the company that pays your salary to sign a letter to tell him he's doing it wrong?
While his micro-managing is frustrating, and probably counterproductive and wasteful, I don't think that a bold stand is going to get you anything but unemployed. Maybe he's had a bunch of fuck-ups in the past who thought they knew everything and that's why he's looking over everyone's shoulders. Maybe he's OCD. Maybe he knows what he wants. Maybe he's neurotic and fussy and un-trusting. Maybe in fact he does know what works and you're a whiny malcontent who doesn't have to meet payroll and has never started a business on your own.
You should move on, for your own sake.
posted by Ideefixe at 6:41 PM on June 16, 2011 [3 favorites]
It's his company. He makes the rules. You're seriously thinking about rallying the troops to tell the guy who started the company that pays your salary to sign a letter to tell him he's doing it wrong?
While his micro-managing is frustrating, and probably counterproductive and wasteful, I don't think that a bold stand is going to get you anything but unemployed. Maybe he's had a bunch of fuck-ups in the past who thought they knew everything and that's why he's looking over everyone's shoulders. Maybe he's OCD. Maybe he knows what he wants. Maybe he's neurotic and fussy and un-trusting. Maybe in fact he does know what works and you're a whiny malcontent who doesn't have to meet payroll and has never started a business on your own.
You should move on, for your own sake.
posted by Ideefixe at 6:41 PM on June 16, 2011 [3 favorites]
I agree with kindall except for the telling people you're quitting because of Bob. As cathartic as it might be there is no reason to your burn bridges entirely.
posted by smithsmith at 6:45 PM on June 16, 2011 [2 favorites]
posted by smithsmith at 6:45 PM on June 16, 2011 [2 favorites]
It's his company, his choice.
I've been in a similar situation, and the CEO/owner approved / micromanaged everything. It was largely because of a bad experience just before I joined where the people they had appointed to manage things were jetting round the world on the company dime in first class and stealing stuff (like the whole office's computers, chairs, desk, fittings, etc.)
So now, every $3.50 highway toll we expense has to be personally approved. Once bitten, twice shy.
They're getting better, but it goes in fits and starts.
posted by blue_wardrobe at 6:46 PM on June 16, 2011
I've been in a similar situation, and the CEO/owner approved / micromanaged everything. It was largely because of a bad experience just before I joined where the people they had appointed to manage things were jetting round the world on the company dime in first class and stealing stuff (like the whole office's computers, chairs, desk, fittings, etc.)
So now, every $3.50 highway toll we expense has to be personally approved. Once bitten, twice shy.
They're getting better, but it goes in fits and starts.
posted by blue_wardrobe at 6:46 PM on June 16, 2011
I had a boss like that! I got another job, and now those stories of requests for specific fonts at specific sizes have become hilarious anecdotes rather than soul-crushing reality. YMMV.
posted by grapesaresour at 6:58 PM on June 16, 2011 [5 favorites]
posted by grapesaresour at 6:58 PM on June 16, 2011 [5 favorites]
I'm in a similar situation now, thank goodness I've been promoted and am moving on to greener pastures (hopefully). The way I've dealt with this, thus far, is to treat everyone that has asked me for anything as a client, not just the actual clients, but managers and PMs and sales reps. They say, "hey, can you do this," and I respond as if they ARE the client, because really any time you owe anyone anything, they are kind of your client. It helps me take my emotions out of the equation and approach it as if I were approaching someone who was going to give me(or my company) money for what I do.
posted by TheBones at 6:59 PM on June 16, 2011
posted by TheBones at 6:59 PM on June 16, 2011
Some managers are just like this. This is my theory, anyway. It's not always a catastrophic experience that makes them like that, it can also be a lot of little things taken in accumulation over a number of years. I currently work with a woman who could very well fit the description you give. She's a contractor with our department. And while the behaviour is irritating, she's not there for her extensive managment experience, she's there for her contacts. So it's not like we can get rid of her.
So here's my boss' genius solution for solving this problem. He took her aside and told her that delving into those details was not a good use of her time, that as an executive her contribution was worth much more on strategic work, and that he would like her advice and counsel on some "strategic" projects he's working on. LN can take care of the little details, can't you? (me nods here)
She was so flattered, she gladly took him up on the offer. My problem largely went away. It comes back periodically, but I just need to slip a quiet word to my boss.
This is not to say she's being manipulated out of contributing - cripes, we pay her, we need her to be doing stuff! But he redirected her attention to the things that mattered, things she genuinely can give useful advice on and where she can make a concrete contribution. Not editing every little thing in every little document we produce.
posted by LN at 7:01 PM on June 16, 2011
So here's my boss' genius solution for solving this problem. He took her aside and told her that delving into those details was not a good use of her time, that as an executive her contribution was worth much more on strategic work, and that he would like her advice and counsel on some "strategic" projects he's working on. LN can take care of the little details, can't you? (me nods here)
She was so flattered, she gladly took him up on the offer. My problem largely went away. It comes back periodically, but I just need to slip a quiet word to my boss.
This is not to say she's being manipulated out of contributing - cripes, we pay her, we need her to be doing stuff! But he redirected her attention to the things that mattered, things she genuinely can give useful advice on and where she can make a concrete contribution. Not editing every little thing in every little document we produce.
posted by LN at 7:01 PM on June 16, 2011
1. In a best-case scenario, is this approach likely to do any good whatsoever?
No. None at all. What incentive does he have to change his management style? Do you have a labor union backing you up? Do you have a signed contract? Do you work in an at-will state?
2. If not, is there another approach you would suggest?
Leaving. Even in a lousy job market, there are still other jobs out there for you. Life's too short to spend any amount of time at a job that makes you toss and turn at night. Look for something else. Don't badmouth the guy on the way out, or to possible future employers. In fact, you shouldn't even take his micromanaging personally anymore. The way you will accomplish this is by adopting a different mindset. Right now, you feel disempowered and stuck and frustrated. And that's not a good place to be.
If you accept that this is a lousy match and resolve to find a better job situation, you'll feel more in control of your situation and his annoying habits will be easier to deal with.
posted by jason's_planet at 7:06 PM on June 16, 2011
No. None at all. What incentive does he have to change his management style? Do you have a labor union backing you up? Do you have a signed contract? Do you work in an at-will state?
2. If not, is there another approach you would suggest?
Leaving. Even in a lousy job market, there are still other jobs out there for you. Life's too short to spend any amount of time at a job that makes you toss and turn at night. Look for something else. Don't badmouth the guy on the way out, or to possible future employers. In fact, you shouldn't even take his micromanaging personally anymore. The way you will accomplish this is by adopting a different mindset. Right now, you feel disempowered and stuck and frustrated. And that's not a good place to be.
If you accept that this is a lousy match and resolve to find a better job situation, you'll feel more in control of your situation and his annoying habits will be easier to deal with.
posted by jason's_planet at 7:06 PM on June 16, 2011
You MUST not be the ringleader of a letter of discontent! I did this once and all those supportive people behind me just melted away to nothing, leaving me with the consequences. Micromanagers don't change... you just need to leave (once you have another job).
posted by Alice Russel-Wallace at 7:14 PM on June 16, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by Alice Russel-Wallace at 7:14 PM on June 16, 2011 [1 favorite]
If you like the job and want to continue there you need to set up a meeting with your manager and with Bob. If you have a formal review process that's the time to do it; if not pick some arbitrary anniversary date (if you're new to the company pick your 3 month anniversary date). Tell your manager that you'd like to get some feedback on your performance. If they're decent managers they'll ask you how things are going as well. You'll want to tell them that you think that you can accomplish your tasks faster/better/cheaper if you are given a little more latitude during your work day. You're perfectly willing to have reviews of your work at some particular time frame (twice a week?). Have 2-3 specific examples of when interruptions or changes slowed you down or reduced the quality of your product. Give them in a non-threatening, non-accusatory manner. If you know better than Bob, you need to be able to defend your position.
Don't write a letter. Don't do this as a group. Don't talk about how Bob impacted others. This is just you, your manager, and Bob. Be professional and earn respect.
If that doesn't work DTMFA.
And a company of 20 people is too small for a chain of command. It's Bob's company. You work for him.
posted by Edward L at 7:27 PM on June 16, 2011 [2 favorites]
Don't write a letter. Don't do this as a group. Don't talk about how Bob impacted others. This is just you, your manager, and Bob. Be professional and earn respect.
If that doesn't work DTMFA.
And a company of 20 people is too small for a chain of command. It's Bob's company. You work for him.
posted by Edward L at 7:27 PM on June 16, 2011 [2 favorites]
Well, everyone is pretty much going to tell me to shut up on this one, but by far the best results I've ever gotten with micromanagers has been through confronting the dogshit out of them, face-to-face, and bluntly, i.e. "you're really messing me up with this micromanaging thing, can you please stop telling me what to do every five seconds?" But maybe that's just me. Of course I don't mean blowing up at them in front of people - purely one-on-one. If you've got some money in the bank maybe it's worth a shot.
posted by facetious at 7:30 PM on June 16, 2011
posted by facetious at 7:30 PM on June 16, 2011
You will not win this one. There is no life-affirming Hallmark story going to come out of this.
Start looking for something else, because this job will devour your soul.
posted by winna at 7:48 PM on June 16, 2011 [1 favorite]
Start looking for something else, because this job will devour your soul.
posted by winna at 7:48 PM on June 16, 2011 [1 favorite]
No, your approach cannot be "here's what's wrong with Bob" if it's going to succeed. Here's how I've seen successful internal-change campaigns work:
- Find a situation that everyone agrees went poorly, a problem you all agree exists, something you want to prevent.
- Find a solution that would address that (past or future) problem and improve your own life, but particularly the lives of others; you want this to look altruistic or company-minded.
- Turn this into a talking point that you can say as though nobody would disagree: "One thing we might try on our next project is to establish a clear scope and schedule up front. Our great project managers can really lead us here. (Smithfield might've been unavoidable, but I know we don't want to go through that again.)"
- Test it out in a few places; see whether it seems like the kind of message people will get behind.
- Identify the people you need with you, maybe a few project managers, maybe Bob's co-owner, maybe the money person. Explicitly ask for their agreement and advice. "John, it's so great to have a moment here with you because I wanted to ask your feedback on something. In the production department, it would really help us to have a scope and schedule that we know everyone will work to stick to. Jan and Steve are great project managers. I believe they could really take the lead if we gave them our support." "*knock knock* Hi Liz. How's it going? I wanted to talk to you about something. First, in production, we felt awful about the Smithfield thing. We were working around the clock, but it just didn't make any difference. I know that was stressful for you, and I'm sorry we couldn't do more. How much did those Smithfield late fees cost us? How did you cover the cash-flow without that invoice coming in? Wow. How awful. I've been thinking about how to prevent it, and you know, Jan is a great project leader. The problem is, things change so much that nobody can keep up, so rather than taking her lead, it's every person for themselves. I've been thinking, one thing we might try is to get a scope and schedule set up front. Then in production, we can let Jan tell us what to do so we stick to that scope and stay on shedule. How would that work for you? Would that help out with the invoices and the bottom line? Would working with the project managers on project timing work for you?"
- Now begin to repeat it more, any time there's a chance to offer a constructive suggestion, hopefully at least once a week. People are going to be waiting for this to go away, but just non-confrontationally keep saying this mom-and-apple-pie statement, this one idea that you had.
- After awhile, you might even find that others will start to say it first when appropriate occasions arise. That's a good sign you've reached near-universal consensus on this vision of a pre-established scope and schedule, led by the project managers.
- Then start asking for actual change. "On this new project, maybe Jan can give us a scope and schedule. I can review it to make sure we have enough time for production." {Three weeks later} "Bob, it does sound like a Donate Now button would be neat, but I don't remember seeing... No, see, I don't think that made it into the final scope. I'm afraid it will throw off the schedule, and we don't want this to become another Smithfield!" {he protests} "Hmm, well, that is an interesting point. But I don't want to let Jan down. I know Liz is counting on this being billed in three weeks. Maybe we should set up a meeting with Jan and Liz. Maybe, Jan could bring your thoughts to the client and see if they'll sign off on changes to the scope and schedule, and Liz can tell us what we need on the finances, whether we need a progress payment or what. I can't really go over their head even though I'd like to try this idea."
- Then, if you need to, escalate. Because now you're not complaining about something that annoys just you, and you have the relationships you need. Maybe you, Jan, and Liz (or just Jan and Liz) meet with John, or Bob and John, about how the Jonesville project has started to fall behind schedule and you don't want it to become another Smithfield.
Maybe scope and schedule isn't your goal. Maybe it's one round of review, or having design advice from Bob come once up front and once in the middle (but not every day). Whatever you do, even if it's not a campaign like this, I'd let Bob save face, and I'd make changes via constructive suggestions for the future. Give him a chance to get with the program.
posted by salvia at 7:51 PM on June 16, 2011 [5 favorites]
- Find a situation that everyone agrees went poorly, a problem you all agree exists, something you want to prevent.
- Find a solution that would address that (past or future) problem and improve your own life, but particularly the lives of others; you want this to look altruistic or company-minded.
- Turn this into a talking point that you can say as though nobody would disagree: "One thing we might try on our next project is to establish a clear scope and schedule up front. Our great project managers can really lead us here. (Smithfield might've been unavoidable, but I know we don't want to go through that again.)"
- Test it out in a few places; see whether it seems like the kind of message people will get behind.
- Identify the people you need with you, maybe a few project managers, maybe Bob's co-owner, maybe the money person. Explicitly ask for their agreement and advice. "John, it's so great to have a moment here with you because I wanted to ask your feedback on something. In the production department, it would really help us to have a scope and schedule that we know everyone will work to stick to. Jan and Steve are great project managers. I believe they could really take the lead if we gave them our support." "*knock knock* Hi Liz. How's it going? I wanted to talk to you about something. First, in production, we felt awful about the Smithfield thing. We were working around the clock, but it just didn't make any difference. I know that was stressful for you, and I'm sorry we couldn't do more. How much did those Smithfield late fees cost us? How did you cover the cash-flow without that invoice coming in? Wow. How awful. I've been thinking about how to prevent it, and you know, Jan is a great project leader. The problem is, things change so much that nobody can keep up, so rather than taking her lead, it's every person for themselves. I've been thinking, one thing we might try is to get a scope and schedule set up front. Then in production, we can let Jan tell us what to do so we stick to that scope and stay on shedule. How would that work for you? Would that help out with the invoices and the bottom line? Would working with the project managers on project timing work for you?"
- Now begin to repeat it more, any time there's a chance to offer a constructive suggestion, hopefully at least once a week. People are going to be waiting for this to go away, but just non-confrontationally keep saying this mom-and-apple-pie statement, this one idea that you had.
- After awhile, you might even find that others will start to say it first when appropriate occasions arise. That's a good sign you've reached near-universal consensus on this vision of a pre-established scope and schedule, led by the project managers.
- Then start asking for actual change. "On this new project, maybe Jan can give us a scope and schedule. I can review it to make sure we have enough time for production." {Three weeks later} "Bob, it does sound like a Donate Now button would be neat, but I don't remember seeing... No, see, I don't think that made it into the final scope. I'm afraid it will throw off the schedule, and we don't want this to become another Smithfield!" {he protests} "Hmm, well, that is an interesting point. But I don't want to let Jan down. I know Liz is counting on this being billed in three weeks. Maybe we should set up a meeting with Jan and Liz. Maybe, Jan could bring your thoughts to the client and see if they'll sign off on changes to the scope and schedule, and Liz can tell us what we need on the finances, whether we need a progress payment or what. I can't really go over their head even though I'd like to try this idea."
- Then, if you need to, escalate. Because now you're not complaining about something that annoys just you, and you have the relationships you need. Maybe you, Jan, and Liz (or just Jan and Liz) meet with John, or Bob and John, about how the Jonesville project has started to fall behind schedule and you don't want it to become another Smithfield.
Maybe scope and schedule isn't your goal. Maybe it's one round of review, or having design advice from Bob come once up front and once in the middle (but not every day). Whatever you do, even if it's not a campaign like this, I'd let Bob save face, and I'd make changes via constructive suggestions for the future. Give him a chance to get with the program.
posted by salvia at 7:51 PM on June 16, 2011 [5 favorites]
Question: you have a long list of complaints against him but have you seen him take criticism poorly? If he can handle criticism, you can ask him to change and politely explain it as your wanting to be more effective. If he acts like he's a godsend mentor, perhaps he doesn't know how he's acting.
If you think he'll react poorly, please ignore this post!
posted by michaelh at 8:16 PM on June 16, 2011
If you think he'll react poorly, please ignore this post!
posted by michaelh at 8:16 PM on June 16, 2011
Bob is not going to change, because Bob has no incentive to change, and you do not have the power to make Bob change. If you can't deal with Bob being Bob, you'll have to work someplace else.
posted by obiwanwasabi at 10:39 PM on June 16, 2011 [2 favorites]
posted by obiwanwasabi at 10:39 PM on June 16, 2011 [2 favorites]
The smaller the company, the more micro the management.
posted by Thorzdad at 4:40 AM on June 17, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by Thorzdad at 4:40 AM on June 17, 2011 [1 favorite]
I worked for a Bob once... and his name really was Bob *shudder*!
If your Bob is anything like mine was, you're not gonna crack this nut. From his perspective, the company he helped found is his baby, and what kind of father would he be if he wasn't there for his baby every moment? His employees are babysitters, not co-parents, and he won't stand for any caretaker mishandling his baby.
As you mentioned, he's not a bad guy. He'd actually be a great boss if he put that micromanaging energy into long-term strategy and making his people feel valued and trusted. Alas, it is not to be. His own need for feeling important and valued is what's driving him. He thinks (or tells himself) that he's helping you, that he's a god handing wisdom down to the mortals, and that you're all better off for it.
Also, my suspicion is that his partners (the other co-founders of the company) are totally, painfully, driven-to-insanity aware of his antics. You KNOW the project managers have bitched about him to the other owners. But he's an owner too, and they don't want to quit either for whatever reason, so they're happy to let him go drive the minions insane instead of having to deal with him in bigger strategic decisions.
So yeah. You're not gonna change him, and it's his company. You don't even want to be a party to the way it would get personal (real fast--you're messing with somebody's baby!) if you were to try to fix Bob. Move on.
posted by Rykey at 5:52 AM on June 17, 2011
If your Bob is anything like mine was, you're not gonna crack this nut. From his perspective, the company he helped found is his baby, and what kind of father would he be if he wasn't there for his baby every moment? His employees are babysitters, not co-parents, and he won't stand for any caretaker mishandling his baby.
As you mentioned, he's not a bad guy. He'd actually be a great boss if he put that micromanaging energy into long-term strategy and making his people feel valued and trusted. Alas, it is not to be. His own need for feeling important and valued is what's driving him. He thinks (or tells himself) that he's helping you, that he's a god handing wisdom down to the mortals, and that you're all better off for it.
Also, my suspicion is that his partners (the other co-founders of the company) are totally, painfully, driven-to-insanity aware of his antics. You KNOW the project managers have bitched about him to the other owners. But he's an owner too, and they don't want to quit either for whatever reason, so they're happy to let him go drive the minions insane instead of having to deal with him in bigger strategic decisions.
So yeah. You're not gonna change him, and it's his company. You don't even want to be a party to the way it would get personal (real fast--you're messing with somebody's baby!) if you were to try to fix Bob. Move on.
posted by Rykey at 5:52 AM on June 17, 2011
I've heard good things about this book from Amazon when dealing with this type of situation.
posted by getawaysticks at 6:16 AM on June 17, 2011
posted by getawaysticks at 6:16 AM on June 17, 2011
nthing not burning your bridges by telling them Bob is the problem - "I loved working at this company but I'm leaving because I found a better opportunity"
posted by exhilaration at 12:23 PM on June 17, 2011
posted by exhilaration at 12:23 PM on June 17, 2011
Food for thought. If enough of his employees start leaving because he's driving them batshit insane, I suspect Bob won't be in business very long. Perhaps then Bob will take a long look in the mirror, or that one of the other co-founders have the micromanaging discussion with Bob.
Life is so very short. No job is worth you worrying so much that you're losing a lot of sleep. Find another gig. Enjoy your time and your work.
posted by Thistledown at 4:23 PM on June 17, 2011
Life is so very short. No job is worth you worrying so much that you're losing a lot of sleep. Find another gig. Enjoy your time and your work.
posted by Thistledown at 4:23 PM on June 17, 2011
Go where others before you have gone: Away from Bob.
posted by peagood at 6:10 PM on June 17, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by peagood at 6:10 PM on June 17, 2011 [1 favorite]
So, here's one idea I'm playing with.
Basically, that's known as "playing with fire" -- you're very likely to get burned.
[...]If anyone asks why, tell 'em it's because of Bob.
I wouldn't recommend this, but if the subject of Bob does come up, consider this favorite:
Basically, that's known as "playing with fire" -- you're very likely to get burned.
[...]If anyone asks why, tell 'em it's because of Bob.
I wouldn't recommend this, but if the subject of Bob does come up, consider this favorite:
My best hire was a person who answered, when asked to tell me about her current boss, "He is highly motivated, and that inspires people who work for him to do their best."posted by Tuesday After Lunch at 5:54 PM on June 21, 2011
Twelve years later, I know that what she meant was, "He is a complete and utter asshole."
I loved that she didn't trash her boss when invited to do so, and I have reaped the rewards in a person who accomplishes twice what most people do in a day. [...]
This thread is closed to new comments.
Working for Bob is never going to be pleasant. And since he is a co-owner and co-founder of the company, he is probably not going anywhere. His partners likely do not care about his management style except to the extent that it is costing them employees. If the business is doing well then his style is probably presumed to be working fine.
Exit.
posted by kindall at 6:34 PM on June 16, 2011 [27 favorites]