Just a routine question...
July 8, 2013 4:45 PM Subscribe
I am looking for the best book on developing routines as an adult, preferably written by a psychologist or other mental health professional. Ideally, the book would have a distinct program for developing routines.
The book would help me understand why some people have mental blocks against developing routines and discuss ways to reframe or dissolve them. Books with associated websites ok, even subscription websites. Websites only, not so much. Dead-tree book preferred, e-book ok if it is the only format available.
The book would help me understand why some people have mental blocks against developing routines and discuss ways to reframe or dissolve them. Books with associated websites ok, even subscription websites. Websites only, not so much. Dead-tree book preferred, e-book ok if it is the only format available.
Response by poster: Thanks Sublimity for the suggestion however that book seems more about professionals getting things right, rather than laypeople developing routines from scratch.
posted by Kerasia at 5:17 PM on July 8, 2013
posted by Kerasia at 5:17 PM on July 8, 2013
Can you give an example of a routine like you have in mind? This is pretty abstract.
posted by chesty_a_arthur at 5:27 PM on July 8, 2013
posted by chesty_a_arthur at 5:27 PM on July 8, 2013
Response by poster: Routines such as health routines, work routines, time management etc, but with the added background information about how the mind works to support or sabotage routines. This is for adults who did not have any training in developing routines as a child - may have had oppositional defiance disorder, or just came from disorderly backgrounds.
posted by Kerasia at 5:42 PM on July 8, 2013
posted by Kerasia at 5:42 PM on July 8, 2013
Routine is a form of habit. These two books helped me understand inner workings behind a habit, and how to develop new ones.
Willpower by Baumeister & Tierney
and
The Power of Habit by Duhigg Especially this one, the author goes into the neurobiology of habits. The book doesn't have a "program" per se, but it has a good recipe for developing new habits.
Also look into keystone habits.
posted by pakoothefakoo at 5:56 PM on July 8, 2013
Willpower by Baumeister & Tierney
and
The Power of Habit by Duhigg Especially this one, the author goes into the neurobiology of habits. The book doesn't have a "program" per se, but it has a good recipe for developing new habits.
Also look into keystone habits.
posted by pakoothefakoo at 5:56 PM on July 8, 2013
Came in here to also suggest The Power of Habit. It's an easy read, and has enough to get you started I think.
posted by ch1x0r at 6:25 PM on July 8, 2013
posted by ch1x0r at 6:25 PM on July 8, 2013
Not by a psychologist but I daresay she's helped more people than the average psychologist:
Sink Reflections by Marla Cilley aka the FlyLady. Although the primary focus of her book and website is housekeeping routines, she builds self-care (including health related) and personal finance tasks into her program. In addition to the pragmatic nuts-and-bolts of establishing routines and developing good habits she does spend some time talking about why people struggle with it, although that stuff is written from a self-help and not an scholarly perspective.
Her website has some really good resources for developing routines, including lots of templates for daily / weekly / monthly / seasonal routines that you can easily adapt to your own life. And if you sign up for her free email list you can just follow along with a few hundred thousand other FlyBabies doing the tasks in her emails as she emails you. She'll email you reminders thoroughout the day about what to do for your before bed routine, what to do for your morning routine, which household and personal tasks the group is working on that day or week, little memory jogs like "where is your laundry right now?" (so you don't leave it mildewing in the washer) or "what's for dinner tonight?" (so you can start defrosting something or start the crockpot or wwhatever), etc.
I urge you to try it for at least a month and see if it works for you. The book is cheap and the website and emails are free (she makes her money selling FlyLady-branded merchandise like feather dusters and kitchen timers but you don't need to buy anything to benefit from her system) and she's helped zillions of people get their personal lives together.
posted by Jacqueline at 7:45 PM on July 8, 2013 [1 favorite]
Sink Reflections by Marla Cilley aka the FlyLady. Although the primary focus of her book and website is housekeeping routines, she builds self-care (including health related) and personal finance tasks into her program. In addition to the pragmatic nuts-and-bolts of establishing routines and developing good habits she does spend some time talking about why people struggle with it, although that stuff is written from a self-help and not an scholarly perspective.
Her website has some really good resources for developing routines, including lots of templates for daily / weekly / monthly / seasonal routines that you can easily adapt to your own life. And if you sign up for her free email list you can just follow along with a few hundred thousand other FlyBabies doing the tasks in her emails as she emails you. She'll email you reminders thoroughout the day about what to do for your before bed routine, what to do for your morning routine, which household and personal tasks the group is working on that day or week, little memory jogs like "where is your laundry right now?" (so you don't leave it mildewing in the washer) or "what's for dinner tonight?" (so you can start defrosting something or start the crockpot or wwhatever), etc.
I urge you to try it for at least a month and see if it works for you. The book is cheap and the website and emails are free (she makes her money selling FlyLady-branded merchandise like feather dusters and kitchen timers but you don't need to buy anything to benefit from her system) and she's helped zillions of people get their personal lives together.
posted by Jacqueline at 7:45 PM on July 8, 2013 [1 favorite]
You might be interested in the upcoming book by BJ Fogg, 5 Secrets of Behavior Change.
Fogg is a researcher at Stanford and the guy behind the Tiny Habits website. Here's an interview with him at KQED. This summary of a talk about the "5 secrets of behavior change" from 2011 might give you a good overview.
(I wish his titles didn't sound so gimmicky. From my limited review of his work, I think he's a smart guy with really useful insights to share, especially about habits and routines and behavior, but I find some of the headline-style phrasing a little off-putting.)
posted by kristi at 10:30 AM on July 10, 2013 [2 favorites]
Fogg is a researcher at Stanford and the guy behind the Tiny Habits website. Here's an interview with him at KQED. This summary of a talk about the "5 secrets of behavior change" from 2011 might give you a good overview.
(I wish his titles didn't sound so gimmicky. From my limited review of his work, I think he's a smart guy with really useful insights to share, especially about habits and routines and behavior, but I find some of the headline-style phrasing a little off-putting.)
posted by kristi at 10:30 AM on July 10, 2013 [2 favorites]
Response by poster: Thanks kristi. Fogg's book sounds interesting. And I agree with you, and despair, over the gimmicky titles for some many of these types of books. But I guess there is research to suggest that a gimmicky title will sell more than a boring, descriptive one.
I have purchased Changing for Good: A Revolutionary Six-Stage Program for Overcoming Bad Habits and Moving Your Life Positively Forward.
posted by Kerasia at 5:18 PM on July 14, 2013
I have purchased Changing for Good: A Revolutionary Six-Stage Program for Overcoming Bad Habits and Moving Your Life Positively Forward.
Changing for Good distinguishes itself from the many other self-help materials available by espousing a sound therapeutic approach based on the authors' years of professional work with people in all sorts of damaging behavioral patterns, including smoking, overeating, alcohol abuse, and toxic relationships. The six steps to change, the social processes one must understand while changing, and the criteria used to measure success will prove useful to all self-helpers.Jacqueline, thanks for your suggestion too but Fly-lady sooo rubs me up the wrong way that I just want to go all spiderman on her.
posted by Kerasia at 5:18 PM on July 14, 2013
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posted by Sublimity at 4:49 PM on July 8, 2013 [1 favorite]