Is there any value in trying to learn a language with my child?
October 6, 2010 7:41 AM Subscribe
Parent/child language lessons - anyone ever try this?
So, my 3-1/2 year old daughter appears to be well into that "brain is a sponge" phase that is so incredible to me. I've managed to get her to learn how to count to 10 in Spanish, French, and German, and it's amazing to me how quickly she picks things up, and how much she retains after only a little bit of exposure.
I was thinking that this'd be a great time to try to get her to hear another language, and given the state of the world, I was thinking about Mandarin Chinese. Now, I wouldn't mind learning a little myself, and I also thing that this would be a fun father-daughter weekend activity -- something that we could practice during the week. Since I have no aptitude for languages, I figure that learning with a 3-1/2 year old is a pretty good starting place for me.
My questions are these: has anyone ever tried learning another language with their child (presumably with a private tutor)? Has anyone here ever tutored a parent/child pair? Is there any value to trying to learn a little Chinese from a private tutor? Or would I just be wasting our time? Any other ideas on how to casually capitalize on my daughter's amazing sponge brain?
So, my 3-1/2 year old daughter appears to be well into that "brain is a sponge" phase that is so incredible to me. I've managed to get her to learn how to count to 10 in Spanish, French, and German, and it's amazing to me how quickly she picks things up, and how much she retains after only a little bit of exposure.
I was thinking that this'd be a great time to try to get her to hear another language, and given the state of the world, I was thinking about Mandarin Chinese. Now, I wouldn't mind learning a little myself, and I also thing that this would be a fun father-daughter weekend activity -- something that we could practice during the week. Since I have no aptitude for languages, I figure that learning with a 3-1/2 year old is a pretty good starting place for me.
My questions are these: has anyone ever tried learning another language with their child (presumably with a private tutor)? Has anyone here ever tutored a parent/child pair? Is there any value to trying to learn a little Chinese from a private tutor? Or would I just be wasting our time? Any other ideas on how to casually capitalize on my daughter's amazing sponge brain?
In my town, which is considerably smaller than yours, there is actually a small company that provides language classes for children ages birth-to-8 or so. (They also do art classes.) It's put together by early childhood education specialists; they do 45 minute lessons once a week, I believe, evenings or weekends, full immersion, and some of them are parent-child, some of them are just child.
Anyway, you might try googling a bit or checking local parenting resources to see if there's something similar where you are.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 8:26 AM on October 6, 2010
Anyway, you might try googling a bit or checking local parenting resources to see if there's something similar where you are.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 8:26 AM on October 6, 2010
Agree with saradarlin. As a bilingual parent (learned the second language as a teen/adult) of a bilingual child (same language, learned as child in nation where language is spoken), I can speak to the wildly variant processes by which children and adults learn languages. Your idea and motivation are noble, but you would thwart your daughter's learning with your own need for structure. That you self-define as having no aptitude means that the gap is even wider, and not as you assume a good precondition for learning with a child. She has all the aptitude in the world until she hits puberty.
By all means, expose her to as much language learning as possible, although I would suggest picking a language and focusing on it. A potpourri of bits and pieces of various languages is more about indecision than giving them useful life skills. Along the way, you could try to learn the language as well, but be aware that your feel and pronunciation will always lag behind your child's. This is not necessarily a negative, but what it means is that you have more to learn from her than vice versa.
One last note: "learning a little Chinese" is perhaps not the place to start. Character based languages are several orders of magnitude more difficult to learn (and retain) than Latin alphabet languages (unless, of course, your native language is character based). Unless you plan to immerse yourself and use the language incessantly, I would stick with a more accessible "gateway" language. Look at your environment--where you plan to raise her, where you plan to spend vacations, where you have relatives, where your interests lie (music, film, literature, sports) etc.--and choose the language most likely to be useful in that scenario.
posted by dalea at 8:30 AM on October 6, 2010
By all means, expose her to as much language learning as possible, although I would suggest picking a language and focusing on it. A potpourri of bits and pieces of various languages is more about indecision than giving them useful life skills. Along the way, you could try to learn the language as well, but be aware that your feel and pronunciation will always lag behind your child's. This is not necessarily a negative, but what it means is that you have more to learn from her than vice versa.
One last note: "learning a little Chinese" is perhaps not the place to start. Character based languages are several orders of magnitude more difficult to learn (and retain) than Latin alphabet languages (unless, of course, your native language is character based). Unless you plan to immerse yourself and use the language incessantly, I would stick with a more accessible "gateway" language. Look at your environment--where you plan to raise her, where you plan to spend vacations, where you have relatives, where your interests lie (music, film, literature, sports) etc.--and choose the language most likely to be useful in that scenario.
posted by dalea at 8:30 AM on October 6, 2010
My parents did this with me. I'm told my Russian and French were both passable enough for a 4-5 year old. That said, I myself don't remember ever speaking either language as a young child.
I've now lost the Russian. But a bit of reinforcement of the French in primary and high school, and the need to use it occasionally as an adult, has left me able to pick up basic French conversational vocab. and grammar super fast. Each time I've needed to get it back, I've been able to do so in a matter of weeks.
Something negative for me was that it messed with my English pronunciation. I do remember a good deal of frustration that other people couldn't understand what I was saying up until age 5-6.
Which is not to attempt to discourage you. I don't think it did me any lasting harm, and I think you're onto an awesome idea. It certainly worked for Charles Berlitz.
posted by Ahab at 8:32 AM on October 6, 2010
I've now lost the Russian. But a bit of reinforcement of the French in primary and high school, and the need to use it occasionally as an adult, has left me able to pick up basic French conversational vocab. and grammar super fast. Each time I've needed to get it back, I've been able to do so in a matter of weeks.
Something negative for me was that it messed with my English pronunciation. I do remember a good deal of frustration that other people couldn't understand what I was saying up until age 5-6.
Which is not to attempt to discourage you. I don't think it did me any lasting harm, and I think you're onto an awesome idea. It certainly worked for Charles Berlitz.
posted by Ahab at 8:32 AM on October 6, 2010
This is a GREAT idea! I'm a speech therapist, and I think it's so silly that we wait to introduce foreign languages to kids until junior high. The fancy term for how fast kids learn new words is "Fast-mapping." They literally learn a new word and add it to their vocabulary hearing it ONCE, at least with a native language.
posted by shortyJBot at 9:00 AM on October 6, 2010
posted by shortyJBot at 9:00 AM on October 6, 2010
If I could go back in time and choose a second language that I learned as a child, I would pick Spanish.
posted by ClaudiaCenter at 9:10 AM on October 6, 2010
posted by ClaudiaCenter at 9:10 AM on October 6, 2010
I teach skiing, and sometimes people with small children book a private lesson as a family. In my experience it's very very difficult to give a good lesson to adults and young children at the same time, especially kids under school age.
Kids who haven't been to school don't have the concept of a structured lesson. They aren't able to concentrate on the same thing for anywhere near an hour. They often don't understand instructions and explanations and really only learn by playing games. When they DO learn, it all goes in by some kind of osmosis magic.
Adults often want instructions and explanations. They feel self conscious playing games. They generally feel patronised after too long being talked to like a three year old. They don't always learn easily by osmosis, and may be happier if they understand some underlying rule system. They may have a lot of underlying insecurity about how dreadfully bad they are going to be at the whole thing, which means they need regular reassurance.
Having the adults present also makes the lesson dynamics difficult, because it's unclear who's in charge of the lesson. Often the adults feel the need to continue disciplining the child or trying to explain things to the child, but this makes it harder for the teacher and confusing for the child.
Finally, it's nearly always the case that one party will outpace the other (sometimes it's a child, sometimes an adult) and will be seriously holding back the lessons unless the family split and start getting separate lessons suitable for their ability.
posted by emilyw at 10:49 AM on October 6, 2010
Kids who haven't been to school don't have the concept of a structured lesson. They aren't able to concentrate on the same thing for anywhere near an hour. They often don't understand instructions and explanations and really only learn by playing games. When they DO learn, it all goes in by some kind of osmosis magic.
Adults often want instructions and explanations. They feel self conscious playing games. They generally feel patronised after too long being talked to like a three year old. They don't always learn easily by osmosis, and may be happier if they understand some underlying rule system. They may have a lot of underlying insecurity about how dreadfully bad they are going to be at the whole thing, which means they need regular reassurance.
Having the adults present also makes the lesson dynamics difficult, because it's unclear who's in charge of the lesson. Often the adults feel the need to continue disciplining the child or trying to explain things to the child, but this makes it harder for the teacher and confusing for the child.
Finally, it's nearly always the case that one party will outpace the other (sometimes it's a child, sometimes an adult) and will be seriously holding back the lessons unless the family split and start getting separate lessons suitable for their ability.
posted by emilyw at 10:49 AM on October 6, 2010
I'd suggest learning the language as well, but not necessarily physically together at the same time. So she takes lessons structured for a 3 year old, and you take lessons structured for an adult, and then at home you can read __ books together, watch ___ cartoons, play __ counting/color games -- these will all be fun for her and also at your language level. She'll probably surpass your language ability quickly if she keeps at it, but it will still be a nice bonding experience and being able to share it with you will probably keep her interested past the point where most kids start to complain and want to quit "lessons."
When I was a kid, I always felt like "lessons" were just things for me to sit through. I often wish that they'd been things that I could have done with my parents, or were ways for me to connect with my parents, eg, learning to play the piano or ride so that I could enjoy those hobbies with them.
Even if you don't take the lessons together, it should still be something for you to share instead of something you're sending her off to do and in which you can take no part.
I don't mean to sound bitter or accusatory; I was one of those children who were always being "shipped off," literally and figuratively, so this has hit a spot with me! But I think you're already on the right track even considering this as an activity that you and your daughter could share.
posted by thebazilist at 1:51 PM on October 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
When I was a kid, I always felt like "lessons" were just things for me to sit through. I often wish that they'd been things that I could have done with my parents, or were ways for me to connect with my parents, eg, learning to play the piano or ride so that I could enjoy those hobbies with them.
Even if you don't take the lessons together, it should still be something for you to share instead of something you're sending her off to do and in which you can take no part.
I don't mean to sound bitter or accusatory; I was one of those children who were always being "shipped off," literally and figuratively, so this has hit a spot with me! But I think you're already on the right track even considering this as an activity that you and your daughter could share.
posted by thebazilist at 1:51 PM on October 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
The local Alliance Francaise does kid's classes where parents attend - the parents are there to sing, dance, play games, and generally wrangle the kid as they learn French in an immersive environment; it's only natural you'll pick a bunch up. My daughter has been doing them for a couple of years now (she's two) and I've picked up a bunch of kiddie French, songs, and whatnot. I've started doing adult beginner's classes so I can keep up with her.
posted by rodgerd at 12:20 AM on October 7, 2010
posted by rodgerd at 12:20 AM on October 7, 2010
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by saradarlin at 8:14 AM on October 6, 2010