Know anything about juvenile boot camps?
May 9, 2006 8:15 PM Subscribe
Need juvenile boot camp recomendations for a troubled 14 year old, particularly around Virginia but anywhere will do.
My mom's friend is having trouble with her kid (drinking, drugs, he's violent to this parents). They've tried everything and are now looking into sending him to a private "at risk" juvenile boot camp. I've been ordered to get recommendations and Google isn't getting me anywhere. He's 13 or 14, male. They're around Virginia but they're willing to send him anywhere in the country. They don't want the state involved so cheaper is preferred, some of the quotes they've gotten are around $40k for a year, which is a lot. I'll put my e-mail in my profile if people are more comfortable responding that way.
I told my mom this is extremely unwise: not only are recidivism rates ridiculously high but we've all read stories about kids getting abused and killed in those places. My mom wants to to help them anyway.
My mom's friend is having trouble with her kid (drinking, drugs, he's violent to this parents). They've tried everything and are now looking into sending him to a private "at risk" juvenile boot camp. I've been ordered to get recommendations and Google isn't getting me anywhere. He's 13 or 14, male. They're around Virginia but they're willing to send him anywhere in the country. They don't want the state involved so cheaper is preferred, some of the quotes they've gotten are around $40k for a year, which is a lot. I'll put my e-mail in my profile if people are more comfortable responding that way.
I told my mom this is extremely unwise: not only are recidivism rates ridiculously high but we've all read stories about kids getting abused and killed in those places. My mom wants to to help them anyway.
A year is a long time at 14. Maybe they should try something shorter first, like a 3 week Outward Bound workout - e.g.
Very physical, teamwork, builds self discipline without being yelled at a lot. Could work for a rebellious teenage boy.
posted by Rumple at 9:28 PM on May 9, 2006
Very physical, teamwork, builds self discipline without being yelled at a lot. Could work for a rebellious teenage boy.
posted by Rumple at 9:28 PM on May 9, 2006
not only are recidivism rates ridiculously high but we've all read stories about kids getting abused and killed in those places. My mom wants to to help them anyway.
I'm not familiar with the stats. But if you know the risk is real, then don't help them endanger their son. Offer to help in another way, such as identifying a less dangerous alternative.
posted by nakedcodemonkey at 9:40 PM on May 9, 2006
I'm not familiar with the stats. But if you know the risk is real, then don't help them endanger their son. Offer to help in another way, such as identifying a less dangerous alternative.
posted by nakedcodemonkey at 9:40 PM on May 9, 2006
What is: "They've tried everything"?
Has he had reputable psychological testing to make sure doesn't have any of numerous real problems such as being manic/depressive?
I'm a bit troubled that your friend is looking for a "boot camp" because such are designed to grind down, punish, and oppress rebellion. If he is just rebellious because he finds his current environment oppressive then trying to break him will make him even more resentful.
A less severe reaction is to place the kid into a private military school - lots of discipline but not as crushing as a boot camp. Why does your friend really want a boot camp?
I get the impression that the kid hates his parents and they hate him.
I think the best approach for now would be to send the kid to some high physical activity summer camp that can deal with troubled teens. If he can learn to rappel down cliffs and kayak through whitewater he will feel much better about himself. Maybe such a camp would teach him how to deal with his parents.
As there are summer camps for fat teens (more girls than boys) there are numerous camps for rebellious boys.
Why hasn't such a camp been considered? Is he so bad that he has been rejected from them?
posted by MonkeySaltedNuts at 11:05 PM on May 9, 2006
Has he had reputable psychological testing to make sure doesn't have any of numerous real problems such as being manic/depressive?
I'm a bit troubled that your friend is looking for a "boot camp" because such are designed to grind down, punish, and oppress rebellion. If he is just rebellious because he finds his current environment oppressive then trying to break him will make him even more resentful.
A less severe reaction is to place the kid into a private military school - lots of discipline but not as crushing as a boot camp. Why does your friend really want a boot camp?
I get the impression that the kid hates his parents and they hate him.
I think the best approach for now would be to send the kid to some high physical activity summer camp that can deal with troubled teens. If he can learn to rappel down cliffs and kayak through whitewater he will feel much better about himself. Maybe such a camp would teach him how to deal with his parents.
As there are summer camps for fat teens (more girls than boys) there are numerous camps for rebellious boys.
Why hasn't such a camp been considered? Is he so bad that he has been rejected from them?
posted by MonkeySaltedNuts at 11:05 PM on May 9, 2006
I'm not familiar with the stats. But if you know the risk is real, then don't help them endanger their son. Offer to help in another way, such as identifying a less dangerous alternative.
I have to agree very strongly here. You said yourself, you know kids are abused and killed in these places. Would you help send your neighbour's kid to a babysitter down the street who has abused and killed other kids? Why is this any different?
posted by Jairus at 5:52 AM on May 10, 2006
I have to agree very strongly here. You said yourself, you know kids are abused and killed in these places. Would you help send your neighbour's kid to a babysitter down the street who has abused and killed other kids? Why is this any different?
posted by Jairus at 5:52 AM on May 10, 2006
If he's being violent toward his family, his parents probably have cause to commit him to a secure psychiatric facility. I believe they're calling it oppositional defiant disorder these days. Having survived some time on a locked ward myself, I think the chances of him being abused/tortured/killed by staff in such a place are better than at a for-profit "boot camp."
IANAD/IANAL, etc.
posted by scratch at 6:26 AM on May 10, 2006
IANAD/IANAL, etc.
posted by scratch at 6:26 AM on May 10, 2006
Children's boot camps have been discussed on Metafilter before: here and especially here. Not promising.
posted by mendel at 6:29 AM on May 10, 2006
posted by mendel at 6:29 AM on May 10, 2006
Best answer: I know of some good counselors who've worked for SUWS, and I've seen one of their campuses. They're a reputable outfit who take good care of their charges. I think this is the kind of thing you're looking for.
I personally don't like/subscribe to their methods or philosophies. I'm too wussy for it. They have a charming policy of coming to the house at 3am to take the kid, among other things.
I will say this in their favor: throwing adolescents in the middle of nowhere with limited supplies definitely elicits their negative behaviors, which these adolescents then have to address in themselves and each other if they want to eat dinner that night.
posted by Sprout the Vulgarian at 7:03 AM on May 10, 2006
I personally don't like/subscribe to their methods or philosophies. I'm too wussy for it. They have a charming policy of coming to the house at 3am to take the kid, among other things.
I will say this in their favor: throwing adolescents in the middle of nowhere with limited supplies definitely elicits their negative behaviors, which these adolescents then have to address in themselves and each other if they want to eat dinner that night.
posted by Sprout the Vulgarian at 7:03 AM on May 10, 2006
Best answer: Stone Mountain School has had, AFAIK, some promising results without beatings, punishment and all the disciplinary claptrap "boot camps" entail. I don't like the more discipline approach at all; instead, I deeply believe in alternative education and programs like Outward Bound that teach you self discipline. Self sufficiency can work wonders; there's nothing quite like having to chop your own wood, fetch your own water and do that in cooperation with others if you want to live. However, it isn't cheap. This school has been fantastic for my own son although they aren't set up to handle really severe behavioral problems.
posted by mygothlaundry at 7:16 AM on May 10, 2006
posted by mygothlaundry at 7:16 AM on May 10, 2006
Another vote for something like Outward Bound's semester programs or the Rocky Mountain School. Think loving, not punishing.
posted by salvia at 10:39 AM on May 10, 2006
posted by salvia at 10:39 AM on May 10, 2006
My past experience working for Outward Bound leads me to believe that it is not the right choice for this boy, but I could be wrong; I base it on relatively little information. If you're really set on it, talk to a program director about what trip, if any, would be appropriate for this boy, and be sure to accurately describe the boy's behaviors. Generally, OB looks to avoid violent, out-of-control behavior that could endanger other members of the group.
Also, consider scratch's recommendation to look into local social service resources.
posted by Sprout the Vulgarian at 11:49 AM on May 10, 2006
Also, consider scratch's recommendation to look into local social service resources.
posted by Sprout the Vulgarian at 11:49 AM on May 10, 2006
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posted by hortense at 9:00 PM on May 9, 2006