September 2018 Archives
September 30
Louise's Ravioli
When we lived in New England we enjoyed Louise's Ravioli. I think it was made in Revere, Mass. I can't find it on line. Can anyone give me a connection to this product?
Heads I win - book ID
Trying to find a kids/young adult book that was read in the late 80s, early 90s. Might have been called Heads I Win. Possible plot, one of the kids dies and the other kid deals with the aftermath. The cover may have had boys on bicycles.
Best food/cooking podcasts
What are your favorite podcasts revolving around food and/or cooking?
please return to your Primehouse, valued Primecitizen
When did the word "citizen" as a term of address acquire Orwellian overtones? Was there a specific piece of media that did it? [more inside]
Poetry Anthology Recommendation
For next on my reading list I think it's time for a book of poetry, but I don't know where to start in looking for one. I would be grateful for suggestions. [more inside]
Help me interpret this Return to Sender label
I attempted to send a letter to a friend who was attending Burning Man this year. It did not get delivered and came back with a "Return to Sender / Insufficient Address" label. Is there any way to tell from this label how far it went? Did it go all the way to Gerlach, NV? Did it even make it out of San Francisco? Not important for any concrete reason, I'm just interested to know.
What can I do for my friend in the hospital?
My husbands best friend was just admitted to the hospital with osteomyelitis in his spine. He is expected to be there for a couple months. He will also be withdrawing from heroin during this time. And quitting meth. He is in a load of pain. He will be dealing with a major loss of income because he is missing the most profitable part of the season. How can I help make this easier to go through? [more inside]
Songs like Clair de Lune by Flight Facilities
Tell me about more songs like Clair de lune by flight facilities. I love the bass-y synth throughout. I love the ethereal vocals and the tune. I love how atmospheric it sounds. I already love purity ring and odesza and I have pandora and Spotify! Thanks.
blink, blur, swipe, whirr
What are some good sources for learning how digital/video/interactive artists make art? [more inside]
where to post participatory art project requests
Where on the internets can you can ask people to take part in art projects? [more inside]
I Need Some New-to-Me Compelling iPhone Quest/Story Games
I'm an iPhone only gamer (with the exception of Stardew Valley on Steam). My two favorite games ever are World of Goo and Waking Mars. What else will scratch this itch? [more inside]
Non steroidal treatments for my dog's panniculitis?
Does anyone have suggestions for treating panniculitis without steroids? In my dog it is a chronic condition. However, steroids cause her to have chronic pancreatitis. She has done low fat diets, she's on Prilosec. I cannot afford Atopica at roughly 300-400 a month, even though it would probably be better for her. TIA!
[AnxietyFilter] Am I going to get left behind by technology?
I landed my first job in the tech industry this year, in a data warehouse architect kind of role. My organization is not very modern when it comes to what tools we use, and with everything seemingly moving to the cloud, I'm starting to get anxious that by the time I'm able to move to a more modern company (1 to 2 years), I'm not going to have the skills to get hired. Am I right to be anxious? What should I do here? [more inside]
Name our new vehicular addition! Difficulty: narwhals
The partner just got a new #vanlife project van. It is dark blue and it is a chevy express. We have taken to naming our cars after animals, and he is especially partial to narwhals. [more inside]
Good CBD For Anxiety and Sleep
I am looking for a good CBD as an alternative to Xanax and marijuana. Ideally something that won't show up on a drug test (low or no THC). Recommendations?
Help Me Eat Things, Preferably Plants
Looking for vegetarian or meat-light casseroles or braised dishes, preferably also low in saturated fat and processed grains/flour. Annoying further considerations inside. [more inside]
Best ways to decide if you’d rather stay comfy in a career or take risks
I have been looking for a new job for a while. I have also been looking to move to be closer to my partner. Nothing was really happening with the job search, so I decided to try to make the best of my current job and city. Now I have a job offer and this is all very scary. It’s a great job on paper, but there is up to 40% travel and 45 minute commute from my partner (better than a plane ride now.) [more inside]
Passion Planner for Hippies
I've used Passion Planner as my agenda for the last few years. As the time arrives to start thinking about my 2019 planner I'd like something similar but a bit less type A... [more inside]
Do you think should I leave my mom's side of the family?
I have a great relationship with my dad's side of the family. They treat me with kindness, respect and love, and they show they care about me. But my mom's side of the family always treats me very bad. It's been like this all my life (I'm 30 at this moment). Should I stay away from them? [more inside]
Just registered a domain name. Now what?
I need to learn some basic (and hopefully less basic) web development in a hurry. I just registered a domain name but I'm pretty clueless about what to do next. I am looking for suggestions for a good "start from scratch" guide to making my first website (and getting it onto my domain name). I'm talking about making something myself rather than using wordpress etc.
Soothing during sadness when you have a history of emotional neglect
Help me find healthy ways to cope with feeling sad when I have a history of emotional neglect [more inside]
Conditioner with conditions
Hi! I'm seeking suggestions for a new conditioner that will be good for my wavy-but-also-sort-of-curly hair, but it also needs to satsify some other criteria. Excrutiating detail about my hair inside! [more inside]
Help me think about minimum standards for a relationship.
I was in a crappy marriage for so long that I think my expectations of how I should be treated are really low. I’ve now met someone who makes me really happy, but I realised the other day I am disproportionately happy that he does normal ‘good relationship’ things that actually should be a given or fundamental to any decent relationship. It made me realise that maybe I find him so incredible because I just don't expect that much. Help me think about what should be some of my minimum standards. [more inside]
Jewelry crafters : recommend adjustable ring blanks that don't suck
My mom is a hobby ceramist and makes all kinds of little beads and baubles from clay and porcelain. She likes to mount them into necklaces, earrings (pendants) and rings. I want to gift her with good quality supplies for her birthday.
What are your favourite ring blanks to work with? for reference she uses something like this a.t.m. [more inside]
September 29
What would cause a MacBook Pro to freeze on the login screen?
I have a 2014 MacBook Pro running Sierra. Today, when I went to turn it on, it got to the login screen and the trackpad and keyboard weren’t working. I tried restarting a number of times - nothing. What else can I try. [more inside]
When does a new season of late night TV start?
I record Seth Myers on my DVR, and among all the shows last week, Monday shows up as S5/E150-something, but Tuesday shows up as S6E1. Why would a new “season” of The Late Show start on a seemingly random Tuesday?
Can you help me figure out what happened to my friend last night?
My friend became intensely ill after drinking last night and I'm hoping the hive mind can help figure out what happened. [more inside]
1970s country music heartbreak
1970s US country music. Point me towards your night laments and broken hearts - well known welcome, but deep cuts readily received.
How do you straighten eyelashes?
I need to straighten my eyelashes and I have no idea how to do it. [more inside]
Is it OK to feed my cat Deck Hand Premium Cat Food every day?
Is it OK to feed my cat Deck Hand Premium Cat Food every day? [more inside]
Late night, come home. Work sucks, I know.
I'm planning on talking to my boss about potential deal breaker issues in the workplace. What is the best way to go about doing this so that things actually change? [more inside]
Skincare/haircare when you've got really hard tap water
Hard tap water is making it difficult for me to follow my normal skincare and haircare routines. It is about to destroy my skin. The water quality issues will be addressed soon but not soon enough. Right now I just need cosmetic/haircare/skincare advice. [more inside]
Scan and Destroy Scrapbooks
I make physical scrapbook pages. Many of them are "pocket pages", so they're actually 8-12 smaller pieces of paper arranged in a page protector. I would like to scan these pages in and then print them out as a photo book. [more inside]
I love "floury" potatoes. What kinds should I look for in North America?
While living in the UK I discovered that I love very floury potatoes. Kerr's Pink was one variety among many that was wonderfully easy to get at the local farmers market, but there was also usually a wide selection at supermarkets and greengrocers. Apparently the ubiquitous Russet is about as close as we can get in the US and it's only semi-floury. Are there any more floury potato varieties similar to Kerr's Pink grown in the US and if so, where could I find them in the NYC area? [more inside]
I need to set up a computer display for a number - with flair
I have been tasked with setting up a display screen for an event where the Grand Total will be displayed with some sort of animated pizzazz. It's just one number that will be revealed to an audience on a projector. There has to be a simple way to set this up. [more inside]
Books for a 5th grader who doesn't like to read?
I'm working with a fifth-grade boy who doesn't have a reading disability, but doesn't like to read. He does like football and Fortnite. Any suggestions? [more inside]
Where to find cheesy corporate stock photography?
For a comedy project, I'd like to find stock photography in a corporate setting that is bad enough to be funny, but in an unintentional way. [more inside]
3+ piece dark gray suit for female types, anyone?
I need a dark gray suit intended to fit female-type proportions. Other requirements are: decent quality, non-stretch, 3+ pieces, and available to buy 'off the shelf' online.
My normally reliable procurement skills are failing me on this one. All I can find are images of prior season's offerings and a smattering of separates. And stretch. LOTS of stretch. I Anyone out there have better sourcing for this than I?
How to budget for monthly salary, biweekly mortgage
I get paid twice a month, 24 times a year. I pay my mortgage every two weeks, 26 times a year. How do I budget for this? Is there a spreadsheet that accounts for the different frequency?
What are other works like the Prestige?
Spoilers are likely, I guess. I'm looking for more work that's structured like Christopher Nolan's The Prestige. More specifications inside. [more inside]
Bi-Polar Autobiographies?
I love Carrie Fisher, but she is not my only hope! ;)
I am seeking autobiographies, or biographies, written by, or about, people living with mental health issues, particularly bi-polar with psychotic features.
I love Carrie Fisher but I would like to hear other author's experiences, particularly with overcoming shame.
LGBT/Queer authors are a bonus (yay!), but not a necessity. Author gender is not important.
Can anyone suggest titles to help?
Thanks in advance.
Carpet Damage From Dog
My dog is pulling out my carpet fibers. Is there any way to save my rental deposit? [more inside]
Plug-In Hybrid or Hybrid?
I"m considering switching from an all-gasoline Mazda3 hatchback to either a plug-in hybrid or a hybrid. If I can't charge it at home, is a plug-in hybrid a dumb idea? [more inside]
Ideas for late-blooming toddler?
My daughter is 2.5 and is (hopefully, only) a late-bloomer, especially in language. We are on a wait list for a further evaluation, and just got off the wait list for speech therapy. I'd love advice on what else I should be doing to help her. [more inside]
3D printing service recommendations, Pebble 2 edition
My Pebble 2 buttons broke, and the Sugru fix came off. Can you recommend a service to get the side cover design printed and shipped to me? Snowflake: I'm in Japan, so I need either a local service or one that ships internationally and doesn't gouge me on the price.
September 28
Dealing with maybe impostor syndrome (?) in new job in new field
I went from being the SME at my old job who knew how to do everything with my eyes closed and brain half-off to being a tiny baby at my new job in a completely different field. At 3 weeks in, I feel like I'm drowning. Is this normal? [more inside]
Why does Kavanaugh have a calendar from 1982?
Yes, I know this is the least important part of this whole investigation, but this was almost 40 years ago. How is it he has a calendar from 1982 demonstrating his whereabouts?
What shape petit fours can I cut from a sheet cake s.t....
(1) Each cut is a straight line across an entire piece of cake, but not necessarily across the entire pan. (2) Cake is wasted only at the edges of the pan. (3) All the resulting petit fours come out the same shape and size (except for the wasted bits at the edges). Equilateral triangles work, as do isosceles triangles. Rectangles work, either in a grid or staggered like brickwork. Hexagons do not work. I think I'm looking for tilings of the plane by one convex polygon, but not necessarily a regular, edge-to-edge, or even periodic tiling. Help?
Sanitary Sewer System Smoke Testing
I live in a complex built in the mid 1980s. It's single-family houses. Own, and have lived here for nearly a decade.
We often have had "weird smells" in the house. Two or more times, the local sewer company came with a big truck and did some sort of pressure treatment. [more inside]
Going from car owning to car leasing with a trade-in
I have a 2011 Nissan Versa hatchback with 83k miles. I am considering making the leap to leasing, as my lifestyle and needs are different than when I was younger and liked to road trip a lot. I understand the lease part but my question is more about my trade in. [more inside]
Can I disable and then re-enable secure boot?
I want to be able to boot my computer from external USB drives and such. I believe secure boot is preventing me from doing this. Is this true? There's a Microsoft page that suggests that if I disable secure boot, "it may be difficult to re-activate Secure Boot without restoring your PC to the factory state".
Is this true? I can't find any other similar statement on the web. [more inside]
Am I an antisocial roommate?
I enjoy staying in my room, roommates don't like this. I feel like I'm breaking some kind of unwritten roommate code. Is it me that is being unreasonable? If so, how do I become a more social person to live with? [more inside]
Best Resources for De-Mystifying a Piano Keyboard?
Finally learning to play piano and am taking weekly lessons now. I have a full 88 Roland FP-30 keyboard to practice on, and my question is:
Music theory and improvisation tips on knowing which notes/keys/combinations I can improvise with starting from low bass 5th chords? I love playing bass 5th chords but I need to know how to look at the keyboard and instantly ID which keys/chords I can create a melody with that harmonizes nicely.
Suggestions? [more inside]
podcast recommendations: ground floor edition
Please recommend your favorite podcasts that just started recently and don't have a huge backlog of episodes to get through. [more inside]
Seeking Inpatient Pain Detox Program that takes MediCare
Seeking Inpatient Pain Detox Program that take MediCare, anywhere in the country (partial to West Coast), where I can go immediately or within 2 weeks. I had 5 surgeries in 18 mos, and need to detox off of pain meds and benzos. [more inside]
My potatoes have separation anxiety
If I'm roasting or pan-frying chunks of potato, when I go to turn them, the crispy browned bit on the bottom (the bit that's the whole point of roasting or frying potatoes!!) often sticks to the pan, and the rest of the potato chunk comes away without it. This happens in pyrex, aluminum, or cast iron, and it happens regardless of how generous I am with the oil. I can scrape the crispy stuff back up with a spatula, but I'd rather it stayed attached to the potato to begin with. What's the secret here?
Copley Square/Green Line Eats
Where should we get dinner tomorrow night that's near/easy to get to from Copley Square? [more inside]
Armistice Day (and More!) in Belgium
We're going to be traveling to Brussels Nov. 6-15, and I have a few questions about our plans (especially regarding Armistice Day on Nov. 11, and what will be open Nov. 11 and 12). [more inside]
Prep me for a fancy hotel
I have one night in a ridiculously nice hotel. How do I get the most out of it? [more inside]
Chocolate dessert that makes you go wow
When we have a lot of guests for a fancy meal, we have two different showstopper chocolate desserts as our go-to's - a chocolate mousse pie, a flourless chocolate torte, and a Concorde. I'd love to add another to our repertoire. [more inside]
Checking out labor practices of a small business
We decided to hire a housecleaning service to come periodically. I chose a local company that specifically claims they are committed to "paying our employees a living wage ...and providing a respectful and pleasant work environment.", but how can I research if this is true? [more inside]
Keep building life in new town vs take a very career-centric risk
When is it a good idea to commit to gradually improving your current life/career/community situation vs taking on a risky, but high-reward new position in a new industry? Snowflakes within. [more inside]
Need help with visualizing data from a Python Jupyter Notebook
Seeking suggestions on how to fix a visualization in a Python Jupyter notebook that uses TSNE, or ideas on how an amateur might seek help with such a problem. [more inside]
Do car mechanics make house calls for insurance purposes?
Asking for a friend: A very old cheap car had all the wheels stolen, plus body damage and possible engine damage. Insurance wants a mechanic to look at it, but it can't be towed without wheels or more damage will result. What's the best way through here? [more inside]
Remove paint from veneer cabinets and molding?
I painted my kitchen, and foolishly did not cover everything with plastic. What will remove latex paint safely from veneer cabinets and wood molding? [more inside]
Best available mini umbrella?
I'm seeking the absolute best folds-to-purse-size umbrella money can buy. [more inside]
Automated retrieval of Journal title, given ISSN
I've got a spreadsheet with a list of several thousand ISSNs. I'd like an automated way to retrieve titles for these ISSNs. Anybody got any bright ideas? [more inside]
Finished is better than perfect
Is there a compelling reason not to use spackling compound instead of traditional grout in a decorative mosaic? It's a dry interior wall treatment above the crown molding that never freezes and it's just decorative-- nothing is hanging off it. The tiles are glass and adhered with Weldbond. I'm just deciding on how to finish it.
Substitution for onions in fried or sauteed food
I've started cooking at home. I have an onion sensitivity (onions, even cooked, don't agree with me). What's a good substitute for onions in recipes like this where one of the instructions is to start by sauteeing an onion until golden brown? Am I safe just substituting/skipping to sauteeing garlic, or is there something else I should do? [more inside]
Private health cover, Australian edition
Is getting private health insurance worth it in Australia? [more inside]
Gift-giving for poor people
I'm broke and will remain so for the next few months. A good friend had a birthday and I have to come up with a gift in about a week or so. She is well off and enjoys the finer things in life. What could I give her without it being or looking or telegraphing "cheap"? [more inside]
September 27
Can a Basement Dehumidifer Make My Whole House Smell Better?
It's been a wet past few weeks and there's a musty smell in my small house. Plus, the whole house is humid--towels left out to dry smell of mildew and mold has grown on a few places on the walls (there's no fans in the bathrooms.)
I'm wondering if much of this could be coming from a very humid basement? (And, so, if a dehumidifer is the best next move.)
What type of jobs should I be looking for?
I'm interested in a new job, but I'm unsure what type of work my experience qualifies me for. [more inside]
Help me think about shaving my head.
I'm considering shaving my head as an outward expression of grief. Am I nuts? I've been considering it for about six months. It's not going away. [more inside]
"Digital media" and "social media"
I'm revising a form, and I want to be clear and concise. [more inside]
Recent NPR broadcast about a gay man coming out - Moth? Snap Judgement?
This is a silly AskMeFi, because it should be so easy to find, but I just can't seem to find it. There was a recent NPR broadcast, definitely NPR, something like Moth Radio Hour or Snap Judgement? About a coming of age/coming out story, where the punchline is that the storyteller narrowly escaped being a victim of serial cannibal Jeffry Dahmer. I legit can't find it now. Searches are conflating the movie "My Friend Dahmer", and so many other Dahmer/serial kill podcasts... which is not what I'm looking for. [more inside]
Prenatal Folic Acid and Autism
Can the knowledgeable among you please chime in about Folic Acid/Folate and fetal development, and the connection to Autism? I promise, I am no anti-vaxxer, and just researching this feels wrong somehow. But it seems like studies have found that while Folic Acid supplementation prevents some birth defects, it also corresponds to much higher rates of Autism for at least some populations of women. [more inside]
how To deal with pervasive sadness after the death of your spouse?
How do I find happiness after the death of my spouse after 50 years together?
A Fair Way
What is best at Fairway supermarket? [more inside]
My trunk yearns to sprint free.
I am pretty much the opposite of most people: I hate pockets in my running shorts. Help me find my dream pair. [more inside]
How to Learn Basic Office Management Skills
I'm doing some admin for a small business that is growing. How can I learn the basic office skills of - how and where to file things where other people can find them easily, both digital and hard copy? How to create digital templates for forms that can be completed but can't be otherwise altered? Where to keep everything and how to set up user-friendly systems? I'm pretty sure there are accepted standards and procedures and the wheel doesn't have to be reinvented here: where can I find out about them and learn them? Are there books? Online tutorials? Where can I find them and what search terms should I be using? [more inside]
That smell: Berkeley edition
What is the floral scent that perfumes Berkeley at night? [more inside]
I wanna blow up Klingons in this particular way
The Star Trek mainframe game has been ported and rewritten many times. In my youth, I played graphical shareware versions for DOS and Windows, and they were generally terribly buggy.
Is there a currently-maintained version of this game that I could play? In order to be the right thing, it would have to have sectors, scanners, starbases, and the general gameplay flow of the originals. It's OK if it's not Trek-branded.
Where to sell my DVD collection in New York?
I'm selling my DVD collection. Is there anything like Amoeba in NYC or perhaps Jersey that will give me a good deal? [more inside]
Help find a book: one's personality is written on the body
Newer Novel. Genre: science-fiction/literary. [more inside]
What's a great mouse for MacOS that isn't 💸
My trusty Apple Magic Mouse broke today after three great years. I'm having a hard time stomaching the $80 they want for a new one. What other mice should I consider? I'm right handed and I don't mind cords for this one. I loved how the Magic Mouse lets me scroll sideways.
Show me the natural beauty of Mexico
I find myself without a home in Mexico for three weeks so I thought I’d go poke around. I like natural beauty, generally on a grand scale. Difficulty: I can not leave Mexico, and I’d prefer to stay out of the western areas for safety reasons.
Column/pedestal/plinth shopping? halp
I'm shopping for a birthday gift for my partner, and playing off an idea she's had for decorating her place, wanted to find a roughly waist-high column to display things on- flowers in a vase, the wireless router with a plaque reading THE INTERNET, that kind of thing. But: like how though [more inside]
Is an MA in English Literature worth it?
My BA was not in English, and now I am thinking about taking seven English electives in order to get into University of Toronto's English MA with a focus in Creative Writing. Do you think it is worth to take all those courses--especially if you are passionate about literature? I do not mind writing essays and analyzing literature--I am currently doing a Masters in Arts Administration part-time for now, but I am quite eager to partake on the English Literature studies. Except I do not know if I am wasting my time if I can make a career out of it or do a PhD later--I am not sure (in my mid-twenties right now). People are telling me to plunge into the MFA in Creative Writing instead since I would not need to take seven full year courses in English for a few years. I have a supportive partner with an excellent job and I am currently in a part-time arts admin job right now. Any career advice would be most appreciated--critical feedback too. Would it be worth it if doing a PhD in the long term is a goal in mind? I do like the art admin work field as well, but would love to study literature academically--simply not quite sure what to do.
How do we swap mixtapes without physical media and still be social?
I've been organizing mixtape swaps to build community with the volunteers at my college radio station for a while. This past one was kind of a dud because nobody has access to CD burners or drives in general. (Thanks new laptops!) How do we still have swaps as social functions without physical media? [more inside]
Can anyone identify this incredible vintage Japanese Fujiyama china?
Hi folks. A friend recently picked up this incredible set of Japanese china. The teacups have images of geishas (I think) in the bottoms, and the teapots are 3D and have incredible designs. Pictures are here. Any idea what this is, and if it's worth anything? The bottoms are marked "Fujiyama Hand Painted Yokohama Made in Japan." I couldn't find anything similar online.
Best blogs & forums that track progress in prostate cancer treatment?
After 8 years of relative quiet, someone very close to me is seeing their prostate cancer come back in the form of elevated and rising PSA levels.
I am seeking blogs, forums, communities, newsletters, and other sources of information so we can quickly get up-to-date on the latest treatments, clinical trials, and other relevant information.
Thanks.
Ontario road trip - what should I see/do/eat? (especially in Toronto)
I’m going to do a solo drive from New York to Minneapolis next week and since I have a little free time, I’m thinking of taking a longer route through Canada. I’ll probably head straight up to Montréal and then across southern Ontario at least as far as Toronto. From there I’ll either continue to Windsor or possibly head up to Sudbury and across to Sault Ste. Marie. What should I see, do, and eat along the way? [more inside]
A cookie made from crushed cookies
I am looking for another recipe that I bookmarked and then lost. This one was a pretty standard sugar cookie recipe but after the first bake, you grind up the cookies into a powder. Then you mix that powder with butter and rebake the dough. Do you know of a similar recipe? [more inside]
please help me, I am a health insurance idiot
I am losing health insurance from my old job in four days. I am signing up for a plan through Obamacare/ACA. Have some questions about the application. Mission critical: avoiding a lapse in coverage. (snowflakes inside) [more inside]
Is there any way for me to be a decent friend at this point?
Is there anything I can do for a long time, long distance friend with substance abuse issues at this point in our long history? [more inside]
All men workplace advice?
I’ve never worked in an office that’s predominantly male before. But will be soon. Anything I need to be aware of? [more inside]
MS Word + Booklet Template + Inserting Pages = HELP ME CLIPPY!
So, I've been given the assignment to create a booklet that will be printed, spiral bound and given out to attendees of a training class.
I found this Word document (Dropbox link) and I'm off to a good start, but I can't figure out how to add more pages to it and have it behave. [more inside]
Bug Identification - Tiny Black Dot Edition
Help me figure out if I should be concerned. Last night I go up from bed and in the bathroom saw a black bug the size of a freckle or sesame seed moving across my torso. Any idea what they could be, and anything I should do now or if I see more? Online searches are not helpful. [more inside]
Books/articles on the obsession with true crime
Asking for a friend: Are there any long form articles or books written about *the obsession with* true crime? Not the crimes or things like ethical abuses (*cough Serial cough*) but the actual current popularity and theories about it? [more inside]
What bug is this?
Several identical bugs have appeared in my kitchen and bedroom. They look like this: https://i.imgur.com/hgnjIWO.jpg. Can you identify what bug this is?
September 26
Good Podcasts in Mandarin Chinese
What are some good podcasts in Mandarin Chinese? [more inside]
Being a good host to a marathoner?
We are hosting a friend overnight who will be running the marathon. We want to make her stay as special and as conducive to having a great marathon experience as possible! Any ideas of what to stock up on, prepare, etc.?
we share an email address, how to copy each other on outgoing mail?
For load-balancing, situational awareness, and auditability, my wife and I made a shared gmail account which we give to people who need to contact our household in general. For example, the utility company, the landlord, the school.. It's working well for incoming mail, but we need to cc the shared account on every outgoing message manually. Is there any way to automatically cc the shared account when replying from the shared account? This is gmail, if it matters. [more inside]
Color me bad
Just saw this video (Instagram) of someone handpainting a tile. I want to do this or some close approximation of this for funs and zens. [more inside]
Why does my cat love this paleo pancake mix?
My cat is obsessed with the Birch Benders Paleo pancake mix. Why? What is in this? [more inside]
United Employee Stole My Kindle?
I left my Kindle on a United flight, and days later got a notification from Amazon that an unregistered user - firstname.lastname@united.com - had tried to send a document to my Kindle. I therefore know WHO has my Kindle - but how do I get it back? [more inside]
Need some help on how to handle an awkward situation
I disappeared on someone online and feel awful, but also not really sure how to apologize for what happened. [more inside]
Please tell me about places you liked or like to work.
I am looking for a job that will meet certain requirements. Bonus points if you tell me about a place you liked or like to work and you tell me about the experience. Explanation below, with a tl;dr at the end. [more inside]
How should I handle jury duty in this situation?
So I was summonsed for jury duty in King County, WA to report next week. I forgot about it until this Monday, and am wondering how to handle it given my circumstances. Advice is gratefully appreciated. [more inside]
Is there a good term for something stronger than a command/imperative?
So with a command, imperative, or injunction, you can say, like, "Jump!". But, it's indirect, it's mediated. For whatever reason, the recipient/focus(?) of the command won't necessarily jump. [more inside]
Can dresses be let out only at the hips?
My SO's dresses don't fit her anymore. Does she have to buy a new wardrobe or can they be altered in one spot only? [more inside]
I want to decide if I want to explore the work of Stephen Sondheim
YOU can help me figure out if Sondheim is what Im hoping he is and how to proceed accordingly [more inside]
Do I need a lawyer to file for a simple divorce in Toronto (Sept 2018)?
My husband and I are divorcing. We live in Toronto, Ontario. We've got no kids, no house, no assets or debts to speak of. I spoke to a good lawyer today who said her fees would likely come to $2500-5000 (CAD). I don't have that money; I'd have to put it on a credit card or maybe borrow it. I'm wondering if I should just file the forms myself instead. My big concern is speed: I'm worried it will take me a long time to pull all the forms together somehow (I work full time) and I'm also worried that my divorce filing could get bogged down in the courts. I'd like to be separated from my husband as soon as possible. Is it worth it to pay for the lawyer? [more inside]
Okay, so my 3 year old wants to make dinner!?!?
I’ve been taking the kids (2 and 3) to the shop and then cooking dinner together. My 3 year old LOVES this. Our oven is broken and I’ve done mashed potatoes, quesadillas and pumpkin soup. What else is there? Oh! And books related to a dish would also be great. [more inside]
Please help me plan a road trip in the Southwest US
The corpse family is attempting to find traditional geocaches in all 50 states and DC. I'm planning a road trip to look for them in Arizona, Utah, New Mexico, and Colorado, or something along those lines. I've never been to that part of the world and know nothing. Please advise. [more inside]
Etta James? Adele?
I'm looking for songs that people in their 60s and 70s would enjoy. Some specifics under the fold. [more inside]
Profs of MeFi, do you get student pushback about amount of coursework?
If you teach in a college or university setting, how common is the following student behaviour: students publicly and privately push back on the workload involved in the course (eg length and number of assignments), insisting that it is too much for a course at this level. I'm trying to determine if this is common elsewhere, or if it's unusual in other places and it's our students who are outliers. So, do you experience this, and if so, how do you handle it? [more inside]
Where to live: Greater Los Angeles/ San Fernando/ Conejo Valley filter
My family is relocating to the LA area. I will be working in Thousand Oaks, where my toddler son will also be going to a school next to where I work. My boyfriend will be working in El Segundo. Where is the best place to live to optimally balance childcare responsibilities with a commute? [more inside]
Help find an old children's book teaching BASIC programming with aliens
Can you help identify this old children's book my boyfriend remembers reading in the 90s? He says it was a picture book about aliens who came out of a spaceship and programmed in BASIC. [more inside]
Dating App Etiquette: Reneging on a Tentative Date
Scenario: you have been asked on a date by someone on Match, OkCupid, etc, after a few days of messaging. You say yes, but don't make concrete plans. After thinking about it, you don't want to go after all, mostly because you feel like it's too soon to meet in person but also just because. What do you say to the person on the other end?
Coworkers looking at my computer screen
I sit in between two coworkers at a long desk (no separation), both higher-up in position than me. One of my coworkers I find looking at my screen multiple times a day while I'm working, and both feel free to comment on what I'm working on at any point in the process, not at agreed-upon times. [more inside]
What does sunrise/sunset time mean for practical light conditions?
I'm never sure exactly when the world will actually be visible relation to the predicted sunrise or sunset on a certain date. Can you explain this? [more inside]
Best software for converting VHS to digital
I have the hardware I need, I've got a VCR and a dongle that goes into a USB port on my PC. But what software should I use? [more inside]
How does speedrunning software know what segment you just completed?
I enjoy watching some speedrunners and have been wondering how the software knows what segment is being played and when that segment is completed? Does the speedrunner have to enter something manually to indicate that a segment has been run?
Which web browser should I use: Firefox, Brave, or Vivaldi?
Partly inspired by this post and the fact that Chrome is no longer being subtle about its surveillance activities, I would like to replace Chrome as my web browser. [more inside]
Books about small nationalities/countries/ethnic groups
I've been reading The Basque History of the World and now I'd like to scratch the itch for similar [more inside]
How to help a friend?
How to interact with a friend suffering from a psychotic break? [more inside]
Is a relationtional database / Microsoft Access our best bet here?
I have been charged with creating an Access database that will contain a significant amount of text data but I'm not sure, after digging in, this is the way to go. Hope me! [more inside]
threes a' crowd-sourced
What are the best trilogies? And why are they the best? [more inside]
A job in hand is worth 2 in the bush (part 2)
I have a job that I'm semi-happy in, and I have an offer for a job that is not as high as I would like, although obviously I am planning to negotiate. Do I stay or do I go? [more inside]
Meatafilter! Suggest some meat and BBQ cookbooks
I'd like to increase my meat-preparing skills and tricks, both basic stuff (think crockpot/onepot meals/stew) and fancy (think sous vide). Additionally I'd like more interesting grilling ideas. I have all kinds of relevant equipment.
What are some good cookbooks you've enjoyed? Website suggestions are OK too but I go to cookbooks first when meal planning.
Hack my beef barley soup
I love beef barley soup. I find though, that it takes a long time to make. Help me with your recipe hacks and improvements. Fall is here, it’s soup time! My current version below the fold. [more inside]
Newly diabetic cat - can new renal diet be the culprit?
I have a 12-ish year old cat that was declared early stage kidney disease in May, and has been on a renal diet since. When I returned for follow-up tests her kidney results showed great improvement - but her blood sugar was suddenly through the roof. I'm wondering if it's diet-related, though the vet says that's not likely. Much more detail inside, and cat picture. [more inside]
How to stop cracker snacking before bed?
How to stop before-bed cracker attack? [more inside]
My wife and I would like to see an EPL match live.
My wife and I are going to be in London in October, and would maybe like to attend an EPL match. I have questions about the feasibility/logistics! [more inside]
In sickness and in health?
I was married a little over a year ago to a very sweet and gentle man. It seems though that his anxiety and impulsiveness level, even with new and increasing meds, cannot help him. Though I love him, I worry how I will ever achieve a family with him. But I made a vow... [more inside]
How do you evaluate whether a workplace is sexist?
I have found myself in the most sexist environment of my career, and as I consider switching roles or companies, I am wondering how I avoid this mistake again? What are the questions to ask or red/ yellow flags to look for? [more inside]
What is the equivalent of Writer's market in the UK?
I am looking for the popular Writer's Market equivalent in the UK. If there is none, what do writers use?
Calming, Relaxing, Empowering music for labor
I would like to create a playlist or two of songs to listen to during labor. The kind of "empowering" music I like is more fist pumping dance music, which from what I understand, isn't exactly conducive to labor. So what's like Beyonce's Flawless but a bit less sweary and a bit more mellow? [more inside]
How do I stop my "chub rub" wearing holes between trouser thighs?
I'm an active man with a large waist size, and my fatty+muscular thighs rub together when I walk or cycle (which is often and a lot). This rubs holes just behind the inseam on the crotch of all of my trousers that don't have smooth fabrics. It's not usually visible to the public due to the location, but it's embarrassing and it lets cold in. How do I prevent this? [more inside]
September 25
Isn't This Just a Glorified Cover Letter?
What kinds of answers would a hiring manager want to see on a government employment "exam"/self evaluation? [more inside]
Bilingual Baby-Raising During Language Acquisition Stage
I have a 17-month old son, who am I raising English-Spanish bilingual. He is saying words in English and Spanish. I am alternating languages each day (i.e. yesterday Spanish, today English, tomorrow Spanish). What should I do/say when he says a word in not-the-language-of-the-day? Obviously I want to acknowledge I understand and encourage his speaking and praise him for using a word, but I don't want to cut his exposure to the day's language. [more inside]
Student Loan Default
I defaulted on my student loans. Location: United States (surprise!). If you've ever defaulted on your student loans and had to make a decision to commit to loan *rehabilitation* vs loan *consolidation*, what did you ultimately choose and why? And how did the process and subsequent payments work out for you? [more inside]
Do you need a tissue?
Someone at work sniffs A LOT. Wet, runny-sounding sniffs. It drives me and at least one other person bonkers. How can I tell her to stop? [more inside]
How to write an obituary?
What do you wish you'd known when writing an obituary? I need to write one. [more inside]
Best more-than-a-textbook online classes?
I'm working through Nand2Tetris (building a virtual computer from the components up) on Coursera and loving it. Instead of being textbook/lecture/quiz based, it is essentially a puzzle to solve each week, and a tangible result. Please recommend some other classes that are more like solving puzzles, or are more than just memorizing an online textbook! [more inside]
Networking for dummies
Is there a site that breaks down networking into layman terms that a semi-technically inclined person can understand? I'm in the midst of switching careers and joining a family-member owned cyber security company. I'm cramming for a few different certs that I'll take over the next 6-12 months and I'm trying to get up-to-speed quickly. Let me state upfront: I'm happy to pay or subscribe to the resource. [more inside]
Searching for an old herbal tea recipe
Thirty-odd years ago, a friend in SW Michigan gave me a bag of "Tea To Allay Madness," aka "King Charles' Water."
I've lost track of both friend and recipe, and google is no help. Ingredients that I remember were comfrey and chamomile, rose hips, perhaps orange rind and cinnamon. Does this ring a bell with any herbal tea-lovers? Thanks!
Cocktail mixers for infused booze?
I made several different infused alcohols for a party a friend is throwing this weekend. Help me turn them into simple and great cocktails? [more inside]
Troubleshoot Three Year-Old's Bedtime
We have a new baby at home, so sleep is challenging to begin with. Add on our three year-old's resistance to bedtime, and it's a nightmare. Halp. [more inside]
Where to travel with no Zika risk. Warm, relaxing, Western hemisphere
My wife and I want to travel somewhere warm and relaxing in late December/early January. Cartagena and several of the Caribbean resorts were top of the list but as we're considering trying to have a baby in the first quarter of next year, we're not sure it's a smart move. More specifics inside. [more inside]
Resources to help a child self-soothe.
I'm looking for child-friendly resources to help an elementary schooler learn to center herself and break out of an anxiety spiral. [more inside]
Extremely delicious vegan cookie recipes, please (and vegan baking tips)
I want to make cookies for an upcoming event and there are a lot of dietary restrictions but vegan cookies without peanut butter or any nuts should be okay (NB: there is at least one allergy to concentrated soy products so I have to be careful there too). I'd like to do gingerbread cookies but am open to alternatives. What recipes do people like and does anyone have tips for vegan baking, e.g. "this flour is preferred by vegans" or "don't use this brand of sugar"? [more inside]
Eurythmics song in a movie
I have this (maybe false) memory of the Eurythmics song "There Must Be an Angel (Playing With My Heart" appearing in a movie. Is this true? Possible details within! [more inside]
Birth Certificate Translation - UK Edition
Mr Bookish and I are getting married.
According to the legal documents from our Scottish registrar, I need to have my Danish birth certificate translated. It is a handwritten document from the 1970s with distinct penmanship. I have reached out to translation agencies (as linked by my embassy) that all have responded in semi-broken English expressing confusion that I require their services. This makes me nervous.
Fellow MeFites, have you had a certified translation from anyone in the UK? How did you find them? Did they require you to forward the original document? Any leads would be gratefully accepted.
Identify this short manga: man on business trip misses his cat
I read a few pages of this black-and white manga online: a man on a business trip enjoys his fancy hotel room, then suddenly thinks of his cat and is struck by guilt and sorrow. Please help me identify it. [more inside]
What can we do to honor gender pronouns as event planners?
I want to offer simple ways for staff and guests to share gender pronouns at events. [more inside]
Please help me choose oral recitations to memorize!
My new hobby is memorizing recitables and I'd like help selecting poems and prose to learn. I found this AskMe, but I have some very specific criteria that aren't represented in it. [more inside]
Should I respond to this email?
I've been pushed around a bit by someone at work who is senior to me, but not my "line manager", and I've pushed back by resigning from the committee that he chairs. I am female, he is male. I was an active member of the committee and contributed significantly to it, and I became fed up when the chair kept expecting more and more from me, wouldn't take no for an answer, and ignored my concerns and suggestions regarding increasing the participation of women and minorities. [more inside]
Advice for new HVAC system
My twenty-five year old furnace died, and its buddy air conditioner should be replaced too. Looking for general advice. [more inside]
Moving versus Staying
I am having trouble deciding whether it's worth it to me to move for a new job. How do I figure out what's more important to me, career or community? [more inside]
Coping with non-profit desperation
I’ve been volunteering with a small non-profit for a couple of years. I believe in the mission and like the people but am fed up with the dysfunction. Should I quit or help fix the problems? [more inside]
Building professional relationships
How do you build professional relationships with colleagues? I spend most of my work day alone or with people whose company I don't enjoy, and I want to change it. [more inside]
What is it that makes us sad when we reminisce?
Even though many events in my past were happy, sometimes when I think about them I get a sadness. I'm not sure where this comes from. Have you had this experience? What would be some ways to process that sadness? Can joy be recovered from nostalgic sadness? [more inside]
Help me find a series of semi-obscure YA Horror Short Story Anthologies?
When I was a kid I used to read these horror anthologies (probably aimed at teenagers?) that scared the shit out of me because the kids and their parents often were killed in the end. My feeling is that I most have found them at a book fair or something, so they're probably published by a well-known publisher, but I don't think they were ever very popular (not thinking about the Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark books). Can anyone help me figure out what these books were? I'm pretty sure my parents gave them away when I moved to college and no amount of googling has got me any closer to finding them. [more inside]
Hotel-slash-child-care? Is this a thing?
Is there anything like a hotel with 24hr child care, or child care services that can temporarily accommodate overnight stays? I think I need help sifting through the search results I'm finding relative to some specific details I'll provide below the fold, and perhaps suggestions from parents who have used this sort of service or child care workers who have provided it. [more inside]
Which Lydia Davis story collection should I read?
I've never read Lydia Davis's short fiction. Does anyone have strong opinions about which collection to read first?
12-hour layover in Amsterdam at night -- should I get out to the city?
Was looking through earlier AskMeFi questions of this situation and could only find answers from about a decade ago.
Updated thoughts about female solo traveler getting into Amsterdam during evening (9pm-9am) layover? [more inside]
September 24
How to replicate these printed wood signs?
Woodworkers and artists: How would you create a wood piece with text printed on it (not vinyl)? Link below. [more inside]
Music notation question: How to depict an orchestra hit?
This is a music notation question. How do I notate an "orchestra hit"? Basically, a sound in which everyone in the orchestra is directed to play a loud, random noise/sound on their instrument. [more inside]
Should/Can I help my ex and his mom?
Urgh. Didn’t think I would be asking a question about this person again, but a certain ex who I’ve asked about before is in terrible health. I know I’m not obligated to help, but I also feel like I should help in some way. Suggestions? [more inside]
What's Between Lard and Gelatin?
I braised a pork shoulder yesterday. What's this stuff that formed a layer between the lard and the gelatin I reserved? [more inside]
What kind of art paper is this?
I found it in my stash and I am really enjoying it for mixed media. But I don't know what kind of paper it is, and I am far away from the art stores in Seattle where I bought it. It is kind of slippery, like Yupo, but only a little. It is very thin, and it seems to have an organic texture, like a watermark, throughout. But there is also a dot pattern that seems machine generated. [more inside]
Seeking a stair barrier
My sole outdoor space is a tiny staircase landing outside my 2nd-floor back door, most of which is taken by my camp chair. I have to move very carefully when I rise from it to re-enter the apartment. [more inside]
Can I be a responsible dog owner?
I've come to know a 10 month old chocolate lab that needs a home, but I'm not sure I could give her the life she deserves. I'm a single person who is away from the house at least 11 hours/day four days a week (with a somewhat shorter day on Friday). I have somebody who's good with pets who could walk her once during the day, but she'd otherwise be on her own in my (ridiculously large) apartment. Is this irresponsible? [more inside]
Vacation Question #836 - solo vacation with some unique component
Hi All.
I'm looking for a unique solo vacation for my 50th birthday. I'd like a vacation that involves doing something or learning something. (Lots) More below. [more inside]
Is there such a thing as a "moon" lamp in addition to a sun lamp?
I moved from one of the sunniest states in the union, to one experiencing record rain. Tonight I cannot see the full moon and it is depressing me. I realize I do not only miss the sun but also the night sky. Thought on how to combat this?
Norway in late October...
“There’s no such thing as bad weather, only bad clothes” - really? I am going to Norway next month from overseas, and have 10 days there. Am I better off spending only a few days in Norway and then booking a cheap flight to somewhere warmer? [more inside]
BOOM
I AM THE LORD is basically the biblical equivalent of a mic drop for when God really wants to make a point. Is there equivalent for Mary, Mother of God? [more inside]
Me vs You versus Us vs The Problem
To those of you in healthy relationships, how do you conceptualize issues as you and your partner versus a problem, instead of you versus them? [more inside]
Google Inbox, don’t leave me!
Google is discontinuing its Inbox app. The Gmail iOS app is comparatively a trashfire. Now what? [more inside]
What should I get my friend for his birthday?
Need a birthday gift idea for a good friend [more inside]
Oz-related Halloween costumes for hot weather
My kids are doing Wizard of Oz costumes. My teenage son would like to be the lion/scarecrow/tin man or ? (coordinating with his sister, who will be Dorothy). We live in hot weather and he hates being hot, so warm costumes are bad. I was hoping for a simple costume that involved shorts and maybe a hat or mask. Any recommendations? Happy to make the costume, just need inspiration for something that won't make him sweat. [more inside]
I need a keyboard cord. Any leads?
My Kinesis Advantage Pro (KB500) is acting strange. I'd like to find a replacement main USB cord for it, but the model is old (circa 2002 I think) and I can't locate the part. [more inside]
Google Calendar thinks it owns my Exchange email address
Though we have an MS mail server, colleagues won't/don't use it and have set up a bunch of Google shared calendars. I set up a Google account with my work e-mail address as the Google ID, but appointments sent from the Google calendar never make it to the Exchange server. So I sometimes miss stuff or have colleagues say I never joined events. Halp?
Pasta class for adults in/around MA
I'm looking for a cooking class for 2 adults on making pasta from scratch, somewhere near Massachusetts. [more inside]
Attn: Picky Eaters of Metafilter
I want to try to understand why picky eaters are picky. A weekend spent with my 11-year-old niece is prompting the question, but this kid's issues are clearly shared to an extent by one of her parents (and some, but not all, of her siblings) and it seems to be an innate thing, not a kid being stubborn. She has been this way virtually since birth. [more inside]
What are the economics of small fitness studios, like yoga studios?
A fitness studio near me is coming up for sale and that's got me wondering how profitable they are (in general) as a business. The business type is that they don't have exercise machines or open-gym hours, just classes in the early morning and throughout the evening.
Are these bed bugs?
Business Punctuation: Hyphenated Phrase with Parenthetical Numbers
I need to punctuate something very similar to the following: "Buyer must notify Seller of changes within this three (3) day period." Does the hyphen go after "three," after "(3)", or after both? [more inside]
Safari extension that replaces keyword(s) with my own word/phrase
This should be SO simple: is there a Safari extension that will replace a word or phrase with one of my choosing? Fake example: whenever the word "dog" occurs on a page, replace it with "fluffy happy beast" so I never have to see the word "dog" again. Searching the Safari Extensions hasn't yielded any results for me but surely this exists. [more inside]
Make your own fill-in-the-blank bar
Last year for my annual Halloween party I did a "make your own" macaroni and cheese bar, where I made a few pans of fancy mac and cheese and had a buffet of toppings available. It was a huge hit, and I'd like to do something similar this year. What are some other dishes I could do? [more inside]
Weird white spots on plants of many different species
What is this what stuff on my parent's plants? [more inside]
Ask him out or focus on myself for a while? Rebound risk!
I've met someone I'd like to get to know, but I'm not 100% over my last relationship. Also now sure how interested he is. [more inside]
eyeball and backyard astronomy for toddlers
Toddler T. has been asking about the Moon and stars and planets. I don't know enough, or have the right kind of knowledge, to talk about what we can see. Can you recommend good eyeball and backyard astronomy guides aimed at toddlers and small children? The books and other resources I can find are geared to about 7 and up, which is too old.
Fun activity to do after school regularly with a 9-year-old
My son is not having a very good experience with school so far this year, and I think doing a long-term activity with him after school every day would help a little bit -- so that he has something fun to look forward to. [more inside]
Investments and recessions - how to plan?
Imagining a scenario with income drying up and wondering if there's an ideal way to plan for that. There might not be a way to plan for a situation with no options, but I have very little familiarity with financial planning. [more inside]
Can we have a tree baby?
We have a beloved tree in our backyard which may be sick or nearing the end of its natural lifespan. We'd like to take a berry and plant it in an open space in our yard where there used to be an apple tree about 15-20 years ago and grow a new tree. What I know about gardening you could fit in an acorn cap. How can we do this successfully? [more inside]
Trick or treat, trick or treat, give us something slavery-free to eat
Where can I buy ethically-produced Halloween candy that kids (and I) will still enjoy? And yeah, it's gotta be the good stuff. Preferably chocolate.* Looking for suggestions of both products and retailers (both online and bricks-and-mortar).
*My mom gave out boxes of raisins. I am not going to be that person.
How do I value intellectual property and educational materials?
I've been asked to create a new certification course to be used internationally. How do I calculate my consultancy fees? [more inside]
Quiet place to meet bio-dad for the first time, gluten-free-MA-edition
This was me. After a crazy year, I've met most of my half-sibs, tracked down the sperm donor, and he's coming to Boston to meet with all of us next month (!!). Where can six people go on a Saturday afternoon near Brookline and/or the Mass Pike to get to know each other that has some good gluten free options? [more inside]
Recovering Firefox Bookmarks
Unresponsive Firefox on Windows 10 machine. Can I recover bookmarks (or get them back, if I download a new version of Firefox)? [more inside]
Sneeze [tinkle]
I'm in my mid-30s, female, never given birth. I have rather recently felt a bit of pee come out sometimes when I have a big sneeze or cough really hard. What's up with that? Is this normal? I thought the pee-your-pants thing only really happened to women who had given birth, but apparently not....? [more inside]
Applying for jobs through online systems (dealine: tomorrow)
I found two jobs I'd like to do at a British Embassy, but am unsure whether applying for both would hurt my application. Advice, especially from people who have used the UK government's online job system, would be appreciated. [more inside]
Vaginal discharge increases when pooping?
Does your normal vaginal discharge (mucus, period blood) increase when pooping? Does it ever feel gurlgey or queefy? [more inside]
How did you stop comparing yourself to everyone?
I have recently realized that a lot of my anxiety stems from comparing myself to other people ALL THE TIME. This was recently triggered by a parents' event at my kids' school. How can I keep this from affecting my life? [more inside]
unusual tattoo aftercare instructions: keep bandage on for 3-4 days?
I just got my first tattoo -- it's a very small one (project semicolon) -- and most of the instructions I've found online advise removing the bandage after 2-3 hours, then cleaning the area with mild soap and applying lotion. But the tattoo artist today applied a Tegaderm (transparent, waterproof, breathable) bandage and told me just to keep it on for several days. Does that sound right?
September 23
[Bugfilter] Identify larvae(?) in clothing storage?
I am doing the seasonal clothing storage swap and found some larvae, I think, in my daughter's clothing storage container. What are they? Not-great pics inside. [more inside]
Trump just like Left Behind villain
I saw a meme the other day which compared Trump point-by-point to the villain of the Evangelical pot-boilers from the '90s, Tim LaHaye and Jerry Jenkin's Left Behind series. My Google-fu is failing me now, though, and I can't find it again. I think there was stuff about a television star becoming president, and cooperating with Russia, and most of the American church following him instead of Jesus, etc. Has anyone else seen this? Or able to find it? Thanks!
Work trip to Boston without car rental
I will be in Boston in two weeks for work. One of those days I will need to get myself from downtown (near Federal/Franklin Street intersection) to North Shore Medical Center in Lynn. What is the easiest way for me to make this trip without renting a car? [more inside]
Why is my fridge freezing up?
Here's a pic
Recently I'm finding the top part of my fridge totally frozen up. Not the coil itself where the defroster is but the area above where the refrigerant lines come in. Any ideas?
How much should I budget for home insurance?
I'm working on a rent vs own evaluation for Silicon Valley, and my input of least confidence at the moment is the cost of home insurance. What's a good rule of thumb for insuring a home in the bay area? [more inside]
Color Scheme Me!
I've moved into a furnished apartment with an open floor plan, and the style and cabinet hues in the kitchen area don't gel well with the trim and furnishings in the living/dining area. Can you suggest one or more paint colors that might look okay in both areas and/or with each other? [more inside]
Blade (roasts) Of Glory
So blade roasts are on sale at the grocery store, but I am not very familiar with this cut of beef. I also just inherited a slow cooker from a kind friend -- I have never owned one before. Please help me combine these two things and make a delicious dinner! I haven't got much slow cooker experience, but I am otherwise pretty confident in the kitchen. No allergies or restrictions, all flavour profiles welcome, all ideas gratefully entertained. (Note: it's a plain ol' Crock Pot brand oval-shaped slow cooker, not an Instant Pot, if that makes any difference.)
Short-term money making opportunities, either remote or in NYC?
I've been out of work for a few months, and a few promising job leads have fallen through. What are some ways I can make money until I find a full-time job? [more inside]
Union Blues
I'm looking for voices on the left that are critical of unions in general, or certain aspects of the union movement. Any recommendations, MeFites? [more inside]
House Clothes for Dudes?
Are you a man or a masculine-of-center person? What do you wear when you're hanging around the house? Where do you buy those clothes? [more inside]
Bookfilter: City stories for city kids?
I'm looking for books to read to or with my preschooler that tell stories that take place in the kinds of places he's familiar with. Basically, picture or early chapter books or graphic novels, that have plots and young child characters, and take place in a recognizably 21st century city. [more inside]
Cheap, local beers from around the US and the world
What is or was the cheap/basic local beer where you are? Is there an index of regional beers? I am specifically not interested in the more upscale local breweries. [more inside]
Using Mandarin with a Deaf Child. Help.
My daughter (11) and I are going to be spending time each day with a boy who has just been adopted from China. He's 13 and he arrived three weeks ago (!) He is deaf. He does not know sign language, ASL or otherwise. He reads/writes Mandarin at a third-grade level. What is my best path to learning some Mandarin so I can communicate with him? [more inside]
Help me dress myself: wedding edition
I'm getting married in 2 months. I have no clue what to wear. I'm really quite bad about finding clothes at the best of times. It's my second wedding and I'm 42 so the easy option of just buying an actual wedding dress is out, and frankly that whole process was stressful as hell last time. Help me? [more inside]
About To Make A Medication Change. Very Unsure and Anxious
I have been on Luvox for 6 months for my lifelong OCD and depression. I have had a ton of side effects and felt like I wasn't getting better. I went to a different doctor in NYC who made a recommendation that i am second guessing. I am not sure if it is my anxiety and OCD, or a legitimate "disagreement" with the course of action. details inside [more inside]
"How do you know it was because of your race?"
How best to respond when my experiences with racism as a person of color are questioned or dismissed by white people? [more inside]
What do I tell the kids about my autism diagnosis?
I am middle-aged and was recently officially diagnosed with (high-functioning) autism, what would previously probably have been called aspergers. Our kids are teens. What/how/how much do we tell them about autism and my diagnosis? [more inside]
Autoimmune filter: How do you flare-proof your life?
I am glued to the bed after sleeping ten hours. In five hours I will take over as the solo toddler parent and I have negative spoons. If you struggle with autoimmune flares, especially the fatigue, how do you flare-proof your life? [more inside]
Looking for emotional abuse survivor stories
I am looking for blogs, collections of short stories and novels either fiction, or nonfiction that entail how one has survived and tell the tale of life after emotional and psychological abuse. [more inside]
How do I start to come to terms with this?
A teacher, years ago when I was 14/15, was in an inappropriate relationship with me. Physical boundaries were crossed but not necessarily legal ones. I don't know what to call it. [more inside]
navigating a work crush
Yes it's that old chestnut again. I have a crush on a co-worker. How do I navigate this within a professional environment? [more inside]
12k Credit card spend for someone else refunded to me: how?
I need to spend, say, 12,000 USD on a (Mastercard) credit card in the next 3 months (not cash advance, not a balance transfer) in order to get a benefit i really, really want. I don’t need to spend this much money in real life……..How could I go about making a purchase like this for someone else and getting the money refunded to me by that person/entity quickly in the most reliable way? [more inside]
September 22
Psychopathic Child
There is a child, a boy, approximately 5 who enjoys hurting others, zero remorse, very violent behavior all around. I've seen him ram a toy into his mother's legs repeatedly from behind. She is oblivious, thinking the child will grow out of it. A phase. I've heard him say some disturbing things the other day when I visited. [more inside]
Facebook password forgotten, "change password" email never arrives
To make a long story short, I changed my Facebook password about two months ago, promptly forgot it, went to change it again, and the "change password code" never arrives. [more inside]
Looking for small fuzzy stuffed toy airplane
I have a friend who is afraid to fly, but is going to have to go on a long flight in a cargo plane for work reasons. She likes stuffed animals, so I wanted to give her a small stuffed plane to hang onto if things get rough. However, my Google-fu is completely failing me! Surely such a thing exists? (Snowflake details of exactly what I'm looking for inside) [more inside]
How do I deal with my panic attacks?
I've recently discovered that hearing someone being in pain will give me a panic attacks. [more inside]
Looking for a video about a device that changes genres
There was a short video about a man with a device which changes what genre he's in every time he presses the button. It turns out to be an ad for digital effects. [more inside]
Massage therapist in the East Bay
I have back spasm and a deep massage is the only way it's going to come out. Can you recommend anyone in the East Bay (Berkeley) who might be available on short notice?
Nutritious and Easy Meals: Grad School Addition
I need help figuring out what I can eat for lunch and (and some) dinners on campus that nutritious and easy. Easy is a priority. [more inside]
I need to dump my watch obsession. It's TIME.
So I'm obsessed with wristwatches. It's taking over my life. I need to find a new hobby. Or maybe start living life a little better. Help. [more inside]
Halloween DIY-filter: giant paper mache head
I need to make a giant paper mache head for Halloween this year. I tried blowing up a balloon as big as I could, but it wasn't big enough. What else can I use as a base? Or do you have other suggestions on making a big monster head? [more inside]
"I've always been a coward"
I'm obsessed with Hounds of Love by Kate Bush (the song, not the album) (the album too tbh). The sentiment behind the lyrics really speaks to me.
What other songs are there about how scary it can be to fall in love?
Driving from Houston to Los Angeles: What's the best route?
There's a strong possibility I'm going to be driving from Houston, TX to Los Angeles, CA the weekend of 9/28. I'm trying to do the whole drive by myself that weekend. I'm curious if anyone has any route advice. [more inside]
Fashion Filter: Clone this blouse
Fashionistas/sewing experts of Metafilter: Can any competent dressmaker/tailor replicate a blouse I love? And how do I go about commissioning it?
Snowflake details below the fold. [more inside]
Replace Dependable Back-Up Drive 'Cuz It's Old?
My Time Machine back up is to a WD 2TB Elements USB 3.0 Portable Drive that’s over three years old. There are many reports of this model dying just after its 2 year warranty expires. I'd hate to lose the data (wouldn't be catastrophic, however), so should I swap in a new one before this one dies, or stick with because this one's proven itself?
Where to buy matching clothes for toddler and adult online?
I have a 2 year old son. I am a 35 year old guy. Is there somewhere online that sells matching clothes for toddlers and adults? I'm looking for a place that ships to Canada.
Turn my trash into gold, or, how to sell my estate when I'm still alive
This is a strategy question. I'm giving myself a window of 3-6 months to get rid of my unnecessary possessions. I'd like to sell as much of it as I can (and then donate or recycle/curb alert/junk the rest). What is the best way to plan and organize this so that I'm efficient, don't lose my mind, and make as much money back as possible? [more inside]
I want to read about old ephemera, preferably with good commentary.
I adore The Avocado's Let's Read Old Magazines. Lileks is okay, but I've mostly gone off of it. I'm craving more 20th-century ephemera -- what are your favorite sites? (Books acceptable too, but I'm really looking for instant gratification/something I can browse of a weekend morning with my coffee here.) [more inside]
Forgot to plugin in slow cooker for 4 plus hours. Can I still eat it?
Made a delicious-looking beef barbacoa this morning, assembled everything in the crockpot and sealed it up. 4 hours later, I wondered why my house didn't smell good. Facepalm. Forgot to plug it in. Should I still cook and eat it? [more inside]
Doctors who can solve gum infection that won't heal
I have been to multiple dentists, otolaryngologists / Ear Nose Throat specialists, a gastroenterologist, an allergist to try to identify and treat my medical problem. Does anyone know of a doctor in the Midwest region of US who treats gum infection that won't heal? I've had my salivary glands inspected, but no one can figure out what's causing my constant pain and whether it's originating in my lymph nodes or if something else is causing it and the lymph pain is a side effect of whatever the actual problem is. It feels like one of my submandibular glands is constantly in pain, but I have sores near my back molars that don't seem to go away. Is it gingivitis and is there a comprehensive treatment for that besides having excellent oral hygiene practices which I implement already? Or what else causes a gumline painful lesion that could make my lymph glands swollen chronically? [more inside]
How to deal with an abuser in the family
I recently found out that a member of my extended family sexually molested members of my immediate family. I don’t know what to do/how to think about this. [more inside]
Small men's bag sought, inquire within
I'm updating my wardrobe and I would like some help finding a decent small bag with some internal structure as well as a nice exterior. Must be available in the UK. [more inside]
Plant ID: garden mystery plant
Asking for my parents: this plant has sprouted in their front garden and covered the open dirt. They’re not too worried about removal, but would like to know what it is. Leaf shape details Thank you in advance!
How would I know if my vintage couch and chair are real or knockoffs?
So I bought a vintage mid mod couch and chair off craigslist a few years ago for a crazy price because the guy lived in a third floor walkup and had horrible pics. But now it's time to part with them. Only I'm not sure what I should be asking for them as someone said they seemed like real Milo Baughmans. How would I know? PICS:
PIC1
PIC2
PIC3
PIC4
What to put in a new mom gift box
A new mama in my life is about to head back to work after her maternity leave, and she's having a tough time, so I want to send her a little care box. What should I put in it? [more inside]
finding THC free CBD oil or gummies or something in NYC
Where in Manhattan could a person go to get THC free CBD oil or gummies for anxiety, preferably below 42nd street. Anonymous because job and abusive extended family plus some other...stuff. Email if you have questions teapot.problems@gmail.com. I need a friendly place with lots of knowledge and without a hard sales tactic. I also need to not be sexually harassed at this place, if at all possible. [more inside]
Income doubled, how should I spend it?
I recently started working a new job that's pretty much doubled my income (hooray!). But now I'm not sure how to spend it. Obviously I should save some of it, and I should finish off my student debt, but how? And what else? [more inside]
Help me identify this film that isn't Big.
My friend thought that the film big (with Tom hanks) ended with his teacher going missing and a new student joining the class who is clearly the teacher de-aged.
It's not big, it might be a false memory. What film is this?
How to become more sensitive, stop saying the wrong thing?
I feel like I often say the wrong thing. Things which (when I think about how it would feel to be on the receiving end) I later realise would be hurtful. I don't mean to hurt, but I'm starting to wonder if I'm failing to put enough effort into considering other people's feelings, and maybe that makes me a bad person. I'm looking for practical advice on how to be better (e.g. I'm unsure if it's feasible to take 5 seconds before I say literally anything), and also, I guess, some sort of comfort (because right now I am feeling like I don't really deserve to be in human society). [more inside]
I passed up a job opportunity out of loyalty, and I can't stand it
A former professor helped get me a job. Immediately after I was hired, I had the opportunity for a much more exciting job. But I turned that down because I didn't want to hurt my relationship with my professor. I've been at my job a month, and I hate it. I wish I'd accepted the other option, but I don't know if it's too late to do anything about it. [more inside]
September 21
Did I miss a day of etiquette school growing up?
The one where you learn you must respect inanimate objects belonging to others as a direct extension of their person. Or is it particular to certain people and their cars? [more inside]
Do I want to put o-rings on my fancy mechanical keyboard?
So I am the proud new owner of a Ducky One White LED Double Shot PBT mechanical keyboard, with Cherry MX White switches. I'm thinking about putting o-rings on the switches to dampen the bottom-out sound (and feel) and thereby make the actuation click more noticeable. Should I bother? [more inside]
Getting the best price for a used textbook
Does anyone know of a really good textbook buyback site? I would like to sell a used textbook for the best price I can get. I paid 96.00 for it. I made markings on 47 of the 556 pages.
Okay, you convinced me
I have been thoroughly convinced to hire a cleaning service. Which one is REALLY good? Yelp and Google and personal recs aren't helping much. [more inside]
Feel need to drink before work interviews - what do I do?
Severe generalized + social anxiety suffering individual here. I work online, and am I am currently doing a job where I have absolutely zero face-to-face interaction; it's all online. I just negotiated a pay raise which went smoothly - but it happened while I was inebriated, as I have been told multiple times in the past "You are better/more personable when drunk." The thing is, these comments seem to be spot-on since I have a stellar track record of acing interviews/etc. after downing a few beers, vs. my sober self who clams up whenever the pressure is on. What do I do? [more inside]
Divorce process in Wisconsin
I'm dating a guy from the US, Wisconsin to be precise. It's early days... but I want to be cautious. And maybe cautiously hopeful it might be a thing worth pursuing. He's been separated from his wife physically for at least 6 months (living in UK, she's in Madison). What is the process for divorcing in that state? Is there anything I should be aware of as a clueless Brit? [more inside]
Comedy (or drama) in confined spaces.
I'm trying to write a script involving a group of characters in a confined space but I am struggling to work out how to advance the plot and move the story along. I could really do with some examples. [more inside]
Verbs for wheelchair use
What is the equivalent of the verb "walk" for wheelchair users? [more inside]
Tunes about Planes
Much-aforementioned flight coming up soon. I am thinking up all kinds of distraction strategies that may or may not help (plastic crochet needle, familiar movie on phone maybe) but also for fun am thinking about putting a fly-o-centric playlist on spotify. [more inside]
Decent brunch in Times Square?
I'm going to a Broadway play this Sunday, but will need to eat first. What's a decent, non-awful place to go to with my family that's near the theater on 41st Street? [more inside]
Video capture at scanner resolution via Linux laptop
Looking for a way to view/magnify objects, books and documents with fine print up-close like a scanner, but via video capture such as a hand-held USB camera. Degree of difficulty Linux, VLC, no phone or onboard-laptop cameras. [more inside]
Meal plan lists/services that lean into efficiency and customization?
I am terrible at meal planning. I would like to be provided with a meal plan. I would like a site that takes our dietary preferences into account. I want to make a single grocery shopping trip per week with a pre-provided list. I DON'T want to buy 87 ingredients because no meals in the plan share ingredients or care about "using up" what you bought. Is there a website or app that can provide this to me? [more inside]
Help us name our baby girl!
Our second daughter is due in less than 3 weeks and we still don't have a name. We like names that are fairly short and/or traditional. The baby will be Jewish, so a Jewish name would be great, but is not required. Help? [more inside]
What are two or three magic tricks that I can start with?
I would like to learn two or three magic tricks that I can perform with simple every day objects (e.g. a non-doctored deck of cards, coins, newspaper, etc.). Strong preference for card tricks, but open to other ideas. Free is best (youtube videos, web tutorials) What would you recommend?
Violence in Tana French's "Dublin Murder Squad" series?
Thanks to the answers to my AskMe about sinister Bildungsromans, I read and devoured Tana French's The Likeness. SO GOOD! However, when I went to read the first book in the "Dublin Murder Squad" series, "In The Woods," I couldn't stomach the graphic violence to children, and couldn't finish the book. Are there other books in the series I would enjoy? [more inside]
Should I file for unemployment from my job that doesn’t want to fire me?
I work part-time at a tiny (three person) company in IL which has had to cut my hours in half and now to zero. I am an actual employee, not a contractor. I’ve never filed for unemployment before, and I can’t figure out if I should considering the circumstances: [more inside]
Forgotten Lock Code
Trying to help a friend who somehow locked their phone and now can't unlock it. 2 attempts left before it erases. [more inside]
How do I get an offensive advertisement taken down at my local mall?
The mall near me has these large display boards for local businesses to advertise. One of them is an organization called “ABBA pregnancy resource center”an anti-abortion organization and the ad says “pregnant? Lost? Come to us for answers” and on first read appears to provide legit prenatal care. Last august, 13 months ago, I complained to the mall under the “contact us” form on their website, and made a Facebook post asking other local people to do the same. I went back to the mall yesterday and it’s still there. What else can I do ? [more inside]
Online support groups for fibromyalgia
Does anyone know any communities online centered around fibromyalgia that are active and supportive? I checked out r/fibromyalgia and it seemed kind of active, but not as active as I'd like. A discord would be cool too.
Drinking and cat litter scooping before knowing about pregnancy
I'm 6 days late, and took a home pregnancy test that came up positive twice today. Going to confirm this with a doctor soon. This is happy if somewhat unexpected news, but I'm stressed that I had some alcohol about two weeks ago at a wedding (1/2 glass of champagne, and 1/2 glass wine). [more inside]
My doctor can't help with my chronic tiredness. What should I do next?
For about a year now, I've been suffering from near constant tiredness (and protracted periods of melancholy). At first, I thought I was just overworked, but a long relaxed summer did nothing to improve my condition. A few weeks ago, I went to my doctor. Our first meeting was great: he drew up a list of hypotheses about the cause of my symptoms, and ordered some tests. However, none of the tests gave us a diagnosis, and in our second meeting, the doctor said that I was probably just stressed out, and (rather unhelpfully) recommended a few early nights with a glass of wine.
I think the doctor has concluded that there's nothing medically wrong with me, but I'd like to keep looking for a diagnosis. So … what now?
Details below ... [more inside]
Best way to soften coarse, short men's hair?
What products can I use to soften the effect of short, straight, coarse transplanted hair? [more inside]
Music ID help!
I used to listen to a couple of CDs all the time, and I don't know how but I've forgotten the band name and practically all details of the albums. Now I really want to hear the songs again... help! [more inside]
UK-based pregnancy and parenting forums that aren't Mumsnet?
Mr Fish and I are expecting a fry in London. Yay! But we're not from the UK originally and have tons of UK specific questions. We can't in good conscience support Mumsnet due to the hideous transphobia prevalent on that forum. Are there any alternatives? Details below. [more inside]
September 20
Why do washing machine timers take longer than is displayed?
At many points in my adult life I’ve used front-loading washing machines. Invariably -invariably!- the timers on the washing machine run slightly slower than the actual clock time. One example: I started a load the other day that was supposed to finish in 30 minutes. I came back after ~35 minutes (33 minute timer + slosh) and still had 3 minutes to go. Is there a design reason for this? Do coin-op washers just have bad timers?
Rec me your fav biblio tool. Difficulty level: No downloads
I'm starting my master's degree and need bibliographic management software. Here's the catch - my new laptop is a pixelbook and so downloading software is a no go. (Only chrome extensions and apps are possible. Not even Google Play apps are allowed on this machine.) What's the best bibliographical management tool that's entirely cloud-based? [more inside]
Do I need to burp? If so, how do I do it?
Previously, I have described an odd sort of physical hunger that doesn't make any sense (i.e. I feel hungry but should not be). I could swear I've also talked about what I think of was "water-hunger" which is a qualitatively unique kind of hunger I get after swimming. I am now starting to believe that though I'm interpreting this as hunger it is actually a need to burp. Do I need to burp? Teach me how. [more inside]
What is this pipe?
I toured a house today (looking to buy). There is a pipe in front of the house. I don't know what it leads to. The realtors don't know either. Do you? Images below the fold. [more inside]
Portable device screen/battery/power woes. Questions!
Do most or all portable (i.e. battery-powered) devices absolutely require a minimally-functioning battery to work properly? I ask because my ca. 2012 ebook reader's screen is now going black about a minute after turning on, and continues to do the same after disconnecting power and then reconnecting. [more inside]
Help my face survive my bike commute
Please hit me up with your recommendations for an everyday moisturizer with SPF that won't slide off my face at the first hint of heat during my bike commute. [more inside]
How do sell fancy geetar?
What is the best way to sell a $4000+ guitar? Ebay? Craigslist? Some niche site? I know nothing about selling guitars or guitars in general, and have been tasked with helping a friend who knows about guitars, but nothing about selling them. [more inside]
Next steps for joint pain?
Not sure if I should push to see a specialist or just follow the advice of my GP. Details below the fold. [more inside]
Was this bad management?
A sour experience has led me to have second-thoughts about an "clever" agreement I have used with my direct reports. Please come inside for the details... [more inside]
Passed over for promised promotion: How do I talk to my boss?
The short version: I was promised a promotion by my boss, but was passed over for a candidate with less experience/training but who's been at the workplace longer. I'm pretty pissed, and feeling a bit slighted/used. How can I talk to my boss about this? I don't expect to be offered the job but would like to express my frustration with his broken promise, especially as I turned down other offers based on his promise of a job (and he knew about those offers at the time, so it feels especially crappy). [more inside]
What's a friendly greeting I can suggest to conference attendees?
Last February, I attended a conference where a rabbi opened the event with a Shabbat service and suggested that we say "Shabbat shalom" to each other during the length of sabbath. This was to a large group of folks, most I assume were not Jewish. It worked well to get folks interacting — a small and easy invitation to engage with each other.
In a few weeks, I'll be helping with a conference (about 200 academics that study contemplative practice/mindfulness) and would like to create a similar sort of invitation. I'm looking for something that invites that same friendly and kind interactions, while preferably being secular and not culturally appropriated. Suggestions?
Patagonia rain jacket repair
Best patch for the spot where my Patagonia rain shell liner is delaminating? I called Patagonia and they can't repair the lining (they offered to replace it, but that seems like a waste when the rest of the jacket is in perfectly good shape). Any recs for an adhesive or iron-on patch? Photo inside. Thanks! [more inside]
Going federal
I’ve always worked in the private sector and now have the opportunity to get a “dream job” with a federal agency. The location, commute and pay are all roughly equivalent to my current job. What are some other things to consider? Details within. [more inside]
A more music like X post - T Bone Burnett's Proof Through The Night
T Bone Burnett's 1983 album Proof Through The Night is superb — gnomic, comic, angry, and full of beautiful music, crisply produced. I appreciate some similarities [and in some cases the formal connection] to artists like Steely Dan, Elvis Costello, Richard Thompson, and Warren Zevon. But who else would I like if I love this? Always a bonus if I can be directed to female artists, because the algorithm of cultural reproduction is so very broken.
Where can I find cotton A-line skirts in the UK?
I want just above the knee or shorter all-cotton or mostly cotton A-line skirts -- American Apparel used to have good ones, & H&M occasionally has them. Where else can I get them in the UK (online or not) right now? Further details below. [more inside]
What do they think I'm doing on that tablet?
Can I effectively model reading for my young children while mostly using a Kindle or iPad for my own reading? [more inside]
Making a worry book for a kid
7yo has some recurring anxieties / flashpoints for anger. His therapist suggested we make a "worry book" or a "feelings book" where he/we can record what he was worried or angry about, and what helped him feel better. Obviously the best tool is one you like to use - so I'm seeking suggestions for how to set this up and make it appealing. I'm curious whether anyone else has tackled this sort of project with their kids, and what worked for you. [more inside]
Aftermarket CarPlay (with knobs?)
The advent of Google Maps on CarPlay is a game changer for me. So what aftermarket unit should I get? [more inside]
Help me stay dry and keep my head on during my bike commute
I am starting to make the switch to biking in all weather and I'm needing recommendations for waterproof jackets and pants to wear. I also am in need of a new helmet and would love any recommendations you have. [more inside]
Things to do in Prague
I'm wanting recommendations of things to do while visiting Prague from Oct. 11-20. [more inside]
Food recipes on GitHub?
Have you found good food recipes on GitHub? Show them to me, please! [more inside]
Best way to get headboard for tempur-up bed?
A couple years ago we bought a tempurpedic Up bed. This is different from the fully adjustable base. I found out that the headboard attachments that tempurpedic sells is not compatible with the Up base. So we have the mattress and base on the floor. This creates a problem because there is a gap between the wall and the bed. How can I get a headboard attached to this base? [more inside]
Vacationy things to do, see, eat in Phoenix?
Myself and co-worker are going to be in Phoenix for a few day of training (actually in some community just outside apparently) the third week of October. While we'll be busy most of the time we'll be there we do have one day and potentially one evening free plus a rental car to get around. Looking for recommendations of must see things we could fit into a relaxed day off whithout consuming all day driving. [more inside]
Is it a bad idea to loan a car to a friend for the winter?
My friend is living in Brooklyn and has a car she doesn't really use or need; my roommate (who is also her friend) needs a car for the winter. Roommate and I are in Pennsylvania. What could go wrong? [more inside]
What is this piece of music?
What is the piece of music playing in the first 9 seconds of this video?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5iELWZ2_rXc
How do I file a shipping insurance claim for international shipment to U
I ordered something which was shipped from the local postal service in central Europe and delivered by USPS to me. It arrived broken. I took pictures of the well packed item, squished box, etc. Seller asked me to go to my post office and file an insurance claim is it is fully insured. How do I go about doing that since they didn't buy the insurance from USPS?
please tell me everything about visiting Detroit
I'm visiting Detroit for a few days next week. What's good to eat, and where do I spend my time and money? [more inside]
Seeking gluten-free kid-friendly recipes for entertaining
We're having friends over for dinner on Saturday night and I need some suggestions for things to make, both for a main course and a dessert! Special circumstances: must be gluten-free, kid-friendly and not too involved. [more inside]
Gifts for a Catholic full-time carer with absolutely no time?
We are going to visit a Very Deeply Catholic relative for a long weekend. She recently became the carer for an elderly relative who requires constant supervision due to advanced & terminal, but slow, illness. She does not want us to cancel the trip. I want to get her a gift that doesn't require time for her to appreciate (e.g. no books) and which travels well (not flowers). Chocolate/food delivery gift cards are my first thought, but if there's something a Catholic woman would especially appreciate I'd like to hear about it?
September 19
How can I get someone to make me a custom religious-medal type pendant?
I have something I want to make into a necklace. The design would be sort of like a two-sided coin or a religious medal, probably cast in silver, and would have simple, specific iconography on each side. I would be willing to spend a fair amount of money on it. Where could I get such a thing done? [more inside]
Best looper and DAW setup for singer/songwriter and/or vocalist types
I'm looking to purchase a looper as a gift. I'd love to hear stories of your favorite such setups. I'd like to get one that is easy to use, yet also extensible and a perhaps a notch or two above "basic" (unless basic can be made delux via daisy chaining a few together, if that's a "thing"?) [more inside]
Shingles rash location: coincidence or conspiracy?
I just got back from the ER tonight where the doctor took one look at the large rash on the left side of my neck and said, "You poor thing. You have shingles." Got my meds, got my treatment plan, got a question about why my main rash is on a previously insulted area of my neck. [more inside]
How do I make myself a marketable editor?
I'm trying to figure out what resources are worth investing in upfront before I apply for editorial positions, and how much my experience is worth. [more inside]
Ontario privacy, should I be worried?
A short-term gig I worked on lost some paperwork I'd filled out, with personal info. How bad is that? [more inside]
Minimal, Lightweight Non-Java F/OSS Mind Mapping Suggestions?
Looking for recommendations for some very simple F/OSS mind-mapping software. Absolutely not Java, because reasons. It doesn't have to have every feature under the sun, I simply want to make a few circles/oblongs and drag around a few coloured lines round between them plus any words input. Ability to export to .txt is absolutely fine (.csv a bonus). Really simple, doesn't have to be a big project or even currently maintained but would like recommendations from people who've used the software they're suggesting so I know it's functional!
Platform: Windows 7
Amending Name/Gender on Consular Report of Birth Abroad Form FS-240
I am a dual US/Canadian citizen residing in Canada. My Canadian identity documents have been updated with a different name and gender marker and I need help/advice to do the same with my American birth certificate. [more inside]
Books on the financial crisis, economics/money, bad businesses
Help me build my library of books about the financial crisis, money/economics, and business gone bad! As examples, I love Michael Lewis’s work and I most recently enjoyed “Bad Blood” by John Carreyrou, about Theranos and Elizabeth Holmes. List of books I already have inside! [more inside]
Laptop passwords do not work - what have I done?
I have a Macbook Air. This morning, I could log into my account using a password at start-up. Now I can't - it gives me an error message. This is the administrator account; the other account's password doesn't work either. What to do? [more inside]
Halloween and other spooky events in and around London
Any recommendations for year-round or seasonal haunt or horror themed events or activities to check out in London in October? [more inside]
Advice on how to make an angler fish mask
I want to be an angler fish for halloween! I am pretty crafty, but i dont know anything about making masks or fake teeth or anything like that. I need advice on how to execute some fake teeth, attach them to my face, or make some sort of mask thing. I probably also will need some make up advice! [more inside]
HOPE ME BUGOLOGISTS
When should I celebrate this year's Great Bugpocalypse? [more inside]
Is is possible to find more of this (engineered) hardwood flooring?
I purchased flooring from Lumber Liquidators about 9 years ago, and now need just a few more pieces, but they don't carry it and don't know what it is. I have pictures, and if someone can help me identify it to see if I can get more, I'd be eternally grateful! [more inside]
#TreatYoSelf - Charleston, SC Edition
In a few weeks my raggedy crew is making our annual pilgrimage to Charleston to celebrate our friend's birthday. This year we've coalesced around the idea of adding a "pamper day" to our routine and it's fallen on me to plan. The problem: we're a granola group that's better versed in setting up tents than scheduling spa treatments. Can you help me plan an awesome pamper day? Snowflakes inside. [more inside]
iPhone backup experts wanted! Most logical ways to backup iPhone stuff?
I want to be able to delete photos from my iPhone, even if I just took one, and then quickly access it and view it and/or download it from the cloud. What backup or storage service should I use, and how should I best configure it? Help me simplify and streamline a backup workflow, that can transfer from phone to (new) phone each year and save me in case my phone breaks or is lost, too. [more inside]
Do you live in downtown St Louis, Kansas City or Cleveland? Compare 'em?
This is a follow up to my previous question about cities for living downtown and car free. I really need to emphasize that I'm asking about living in these downtowns, not near them but in them. I'm a downtown loft urbanite kind of guy. I'm originally from the east coast, so I feel like I have a decent grasp on what Cleveland is and isn't, but I haven't been there in a long time. I've never been to St. Louis or Kansas City. How do they compare? [more inside]
Supporting the Reds in the Riviera
Where can we watch the Liverpool-Napoli Champion's Cup game in southern France on October 3rd? [more inside]
Resources for family of depressed teen
I am looking for excellent books, websites, articles, and other resources aimed at parents of teenagers diagnosed with major depression (non-psychotic). Personal advice for family members is also welcome. [more inside]
Soroban (Japanese abacus) training for third grader?
If you are familiar with soroban training for kids - popular in the southeast Asian community - or if you are an elementary teacher, can you please tell me if you think it's worthwhile as a method to teach a child who is struggling a bit with simple adding and subtracting (what her third grade teacher calls the math facts? [more inside]
Getting up in the morning with spouse...together or seperate
For all you married or living together couples out there, do you and your other half wake up together in the morning at the same time or does one wake up and leave before the other gets up? [more inside]
Resort/lodging recommendations in Belize or Costa Rica?
I usually go AirBnb but for this trip I'm looking for something a bit more all-inclusive. [more inside]
NYCFilter -- Building Gas Shut Off
Hi All!
A month ago the cooking gas in my building was shut off by ConEd. I was hoping that service would be restored quickly, but ConEd says that the landlord has to do something, and the landlord says that making the fixes is too expensive, so they're just going to supply everyone in the building with a hot plate and call it a day. That's not acceptable to me, and I want to figure out what to do – somewhere between asking for rent abatements / repairs vs. just moving out. [more inside]
Side dishes side-eye
I've been thinking about the shade thrown at potlucks, where people judge one another on the way they prepared their dish – like, if someone has dared to put raisins in their rice pudding (or not.) Trying to come up with other examples. [more inside]
more like this
Hi all - can you help me identify organizations that are like this one? The key things that stand out to me are these: the work of the organization involves data science to some degree; the mission is a beneficial one; the people employed by the organization are diverse and have different but complementary educational and professional backgrounds; the projects seem intellectually challenging.
The context for my question is that I am trying to help someone with a background in economics/data find a new job that makes the world a better place, is interesting and engaging, and offers the possibility that coworkers will become friends.
Help my headaches
About once every 3-4 weeks, I get a sort of dull mostly-persistent headache. I can't figure out what the trigger might be (other than unspecific stress, I guess), or any reliable way to deal with them except wait it out. I am looking for suggestions on how to deal with them, and perhaps prevent them. [more inside]
Pinterest-type software for audio/video/text - for songwriting?
I keep track of a bunch of media for songwriting purposes. YouTube videos, full songs or audio samples (mp3s), visual art, lyrics - full or fragments, poems, quotes. Does there exist a Pinterest-like tool where I can assemble them all in a grid and sort by various criteria, create new boards, etc? Does Evernote do this?
Things to do in LA with a 4-year-old
I'm dragging my wife and preschool-aged daughter to LA next week for a conference. We're (unfortunately) staying at the conference hotel, the Loews Hollywood at Hollywood & Highland, but will have a car. A trip to Griffith Park is in the plans, but what else might they want to do while I'm schmoozing all day Thursday and Friday? [more inside]
She's Felix. I'm Oscar. Helpful hints from Heloise?
My partner and I have wildly different levels of comfort when it comes to cleanliness in the house. I have some major gaps in my housecleaning education. Can you help me come up with a list of chores and the frequency with which to do them? [more inside]
Asset management training: What can it do for me?
For the last three months I've been running a tool tracking program for a mid-size fabrication and engineering company. We design, build, and maintain liquid process systems like dairies and breweries. I have exceeded expectations, and the senior management is looking to hand over more responsibilities incrementally. I'm curious about whether AMCL certification and ISO 55000 training would be useful. [more inside]
Visual / feel references for 50s USA / Flying Saucers
I'm working on a game about flying saucers set in (an expy of) 50s USA. I'm trying to find references - images, movies, TV, comics, etc. for the visual style and general feel of the game. This is not an era I'm actually very familiar with, so I'd love any pointers for things to look at, especially obvious ones.
Tool for bulk-reporting abusive tweets?
I report antisemitic and racist tweets using Twitter's browser interface. I can usually find several tweets to check off in the first up-to-five box, but when I find an abusive one further down the timeline, subsequent boxes show the new tweet along with the same few recent tweets. It gets quite tedious to report an account with many abusive tweets because it takes six clicks for each one. Is there a tool or plugin that makes this easier? When I do a Twitter search for, e.g., "jew: @account" it would be nice to be able to select and report many at once.
September 18
How to promote a debut fantasy novel?
My debut novel came out six weeks ago. Hooray! It got an enthusiastic starred review from Publishers Weekly. Hooray! Then nobody else reviewed it, and it sailed into oblivion. What do authors of weird small-press literary fantasy novels do to find readers? [more inside]
Hand Me a Logo?
Isn't there a famous logo with two hands cupping a ball of some sort? I can't seem to place it. It looks vaguely like this or this.
Level Up: Artistic Career
In Australian arts terms, I'm probably now a "midcareer" artist. What can I do to make the best of my current career path? [more inside]
Older cars don't understand their younger phone cousins very well
If I have a 2015 Civic and I think the whole way it connects with my iPhone, plays music and does Handsfree really sucks (some being Siri's fault and some being the car's fault), would switching to Android help? And/or could I think about replacing the entertainment unit? [more inside]
city clerk was impolite, any recourse that's not merely cathartic?
Applied for a marriage license today. When I asked the clerk how to fill out my parents' names in the form, she explained that "normally, in this country" the man does not change his surname upon marriage, and "normally, in this country" the woman does. She spoke loudly and slowly, with unusually simple sentence structure, and repeated herself nearly verbatim three times until I gave up asking for clarification. Is there anything I can do that would be likely to reduce this sort of behavior? [more inside]
Favorite Source for Logic Puzzles
We have a sudden mania for logic puzzles in our house! What are your favorite sources for logic puzzles? (Online, print, whatever.) I would double extra love a site with a "logic puzzle of the day" (or even week) that I could put in my RSS reader. A range of difficulties would be great.
Mystery Shoulder Blade Pain
I have a mysterious nerve-like pain in my left shoulder blade. Help me figure out what it is. [more inside]
How much sympathy/consideration can I expect from a flatmate
Dear all,
after my mum and best friend died this year I am struggling finding space and getting understanding from my flatmate. I wonder what is ok for me to expect and how I can best deal with the situation I am in when I have very little energy. [more inside]
How to wash nice clothes?
I am not a fashionista by any means and don't aspire to be, but I've recently decided to stop looking sloppy all the time and ended up purchasing some nice blouses and dress(ier) pants. However, I have no idea how to wash them. This is where you can help! [more inside]
What questions should I ask a prospective pediatrician?
My wife and I are shopping around for a pediatrician to take care of our forthcoming progeny. What kind of questions should we be asking during a meet and greet appointment? Thanks.
"So...does anyone in the office want to have an Insecure watch party?"
Job hunting and wondering if I should ask about an employer's commitment to diversity, or how to navigate a possibly great job as one of the only POC in the office? (No, I will not actually propose watching Insecure to the office, y'all brazy.) [more inside]
Where can I find Aida fabric that is this color green?
There's an Etsy pattern that I love that is depicted on this green Aida cloth. I can't find that color of Aida on sale anywhere... is there some place I'm not looking?
What can I cook with shaved steak?
Once every few months, I get a pound or so of shaved steak in my meat CSA. I know it's beef, but I'm not sure of the cut other than what it says on the label -- "Shaved steak." It's cut extremely thin -- so thin that it's often torn. Over the past year, I've made the obvious (Philly cheesesteaks), and have also tried it in pho and in gyudon, but I've run out of ideas. What else can I make with shaved steak?
Help me wait while my boyfriend decides our future
My partner isn't sure if he wants to stay in this relationship, but he's going to therapy to figure it out. How do I handle the wait while my partner decides if he wants to stay? All the details inside. [more inside]
I need an Android app for tracking PT exercises
I need a checklist of exercise tracking app that works specifically for PT exercises. [more inside]
Audiobooks to fall asleep to
In search of recommendations of audiobooks to listen to in bed as I fall asleep. Characteristics I'm looking for and good examples under the cut. [more inside]
Appeals Hearing for Healthcare Marketplace: Good Luck Hunting
I have a hearing (by phone) with a Healthcare Marketplace Appeals Federal Hearings Officer. This is the last stop on the appeals train when your coverage is terminated. Not seeking legal advice- just any other experiences, tips, or wisdom before making the call? [a bit more inside] [more inside]
Is there a jitterbug for home music management?
I have researched on askme and reddit and have only found answers that are over my head or don't sound like what I want. I am so fed up I am looking around my house thinking where can I shelve 500 cds? In 1995 I never had any problems listening to my music. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ [more inside]
Relaxing places to go in October
I'm looking at taking some time off of work the last week of October to try to relax before the stress of Nov/Dec. I'd like to stay in the US, but I'm willing to take any suggestions within that limit.
books in advance of Japan trip?
I need readable novels or popular history to help me prepare for a trip to Japan. [more inside]
Are there any nutrient smoothie powders for people with food allergies?
I'm looking for a nutritional shake powder that I can use on a semi-regular basis as part of a meal with greek yogurt, milk, and frozen fruit blended into a smoothie. I need something that focuses more on micro/macro nutrients than necessarily on protein (which is what most seem to.) It also needs to be something that doesn't use dairy (the milk I use is lactose free), nuts, beans, or soy. I realize I could just take a multivitamin but I've had a lot of trouble digesting them in the past and I'd prefer to see if I can integrate it into a meal. What is out there that I should be looking at?
Looking for recommendations on books on emotional/comfort/binge eating
I'd like to find a book to help me stop mindlessly binging on food. A couple of books that showed up when I searched on Amazon were Breaking Free from Emotional Eating by Geneen Roth, I Can Make You Thin by Paul McKenna, and a book called Brain Over Binge.
Are those any good or does anybody have any other suggestions? Also open to things like podcasts, websites or other sources of info.
To clarify I'm not really looking for books that suggest diet plans or snacking on low calorie foods or anything like that, I'm looking for books focused on the root causes.
Thanks!
Best Day Hikes Near Portland, OR?
Any particularly recommended day hikes near Portland, OR? Mount Hood, the Gorge, the Coast? [more inside]
Need a way to make a one-to-many daily announcement. How?
I deal in (rare) vinyl records. Each day, I list 3 on my site for sale. When I list the records, I send a text to my subscribers (which I've gathered into a "Group" on my texting app, Textra). "Today's records are up!" and then they all have the same opportunity to purchase. Some literally sell within 30 seconds of being listed. Lately, multiple people have complained they're not getting the texts and they're missing out on records. I fear I need another solution, especially as the list grows, but what? [more inside]
really considering a coding bootcamp- looking for insights
I am aware of the downsides already and think the positives outweigh them [more inside]
Choice Instrumentals
I'd like to listen to more instrumental music like Depression-pasillo by Andrew Bird's Bowl of Fire; Ctzar by Rhapsodija Trio; and [untitled] by Neutral Milk Hotel. (Spotify links) [more inside]
Daycare/childcare in Providence, RI for four days next week?
My two-year-old and I will be in Providence for four days next week to take care of a relative. I will also be working from home during that time. Is there a drop-in daycare or a childcare provider in the area who would take good care of my precious kraken for four days next week? [more inside]
I need a specific cat litter delivered to me today. Help! (Chicago)
I am currently unable to lift anything heavy, so I need to have it delivered to my home. I am also unable to drive at the moment.
I need this cat litter, and no other, and I need it now. I screwed up by not ordering in advance (I thought I had another box in the house). I need it today. Unfortunately, I am striking out on the usual same-day delivery options.... [more inside]
Solo day in or around Las Vegas
I'm going to be in Las Vegas for a week in October. The first three days will be climbing at Red Rock Canyon, the last three days will be a conference.
The middle day I'll be by myself and I'm trying to decide what to do! Not as interested in the typical Vegas strip type stuff, and also willing to do a longer day trip... [more inside]
Best dash cam for night driving.
Hi folks;
I work nights & do a lot of driving.
I need to buy a dashcam. I don't want wifi, or GPS--just a front facing cam.
Small,discreet,and really good for nights,and removable.All for city driving.
Any suggestions?
Thank you all :-)
Buying a house-filter; or: death by a thousand cuts and plastic pipes
After a few weeks of searching in a hot real estate market, my wife and I are under contract for a house, a few issues have come up during inspection and I would like some real world feedback or advice beyond the DIY online forum arguments my google searches have turned up. [more inside]
Flying in 2018 - REAL IDs and extensions (not the hair kind)
I've been googling this a lot and I feel like the answer is somewhere, but I can't find it. Long story short: can anyone point me to a federal or national website or contact person that can confirm that the latest extension of REAL ID implementation expires in 2020 and not 2018? [more inside]
Funeral and Burial Conundrum
My mother died this weekend, just shy of three months after my father. She'll be buried in the same plot as my father, which is presenting… problems. Help me work out which is the least-worst option, and how to communicate with my extended family? [more inside]
Trick or treating in Orlando
Hi gang,
My family and I will be in Orlando, Florida during Halloween. I'd like to take my kids (both under 8 years old) to a local neighborhood in/around Orlando for a real American trick or treating, as they've never experienced it before. Can you guys recommend places or neighborhoods to go to?
Thanks in advance!
Should I agree to be the trustee for my disabled cousin's living will?
My cousin is intellectually disabled and my Aunt's recently asked if she can list me as a trustee on his living will. I don't think they have any other good options, so I'd like to agree to it. But I don't know much about wills or trusts, so I just want to be sure I'm not accidentally committing myself to something way out of my league. Is being a trustee generally a big deal or not that major? [more inside]
September 17
Looking for the perfect desk!
I'm trying to find a desk for home that has some specific criteria. I'm not sure where to shop or how to find what I'm looking for - snowflake details inside. [more inside]
How much tax will I pay to bring a pair of skis back into Canada?
I am thinking of buying a pair of used skis in Denver, and bring them back to Vancouver. The price will be $999 USD, i.e. approx $1300 CAD. The personal exemption is $800 for my 2-3 day trip. There are no duties on skis, but do I pay PST/GST on the excess ($500) or the entire value ($1300)? Just trying to figure out whether I'm really gonna be saving much.
Complex music suggestions to help develop a baby's ear?
Inspired by this post about developing perfect pitch and musicality in a child by playing complex music during their window of language acquisition- can you suggest complex music that might help? [more inside]
My stupid phone refuses to play nice with my stupid headphones!
The sound on my cell phone goes crazy when I try to use headphones! It immediately drops down to zero, no matter what I do. Has anyone else had this problem and found a fix? [more inside]
Find a special slanted wooden spoon-type-thing?
My husband's favorite wooden cooking implement has worn down, and he said "it would impossible" to find another one. "Oh ho," I said, "clearly you don't know the magic that is Ask Metafilter."
He said the spoon is called a "Pumpkin G Mother" spoon and may be from Japan. It is a wooden implement with a slanted top. Here is a picture of the thingy in its current, battered form. Can you find this spoon, or a reasonable facsimile thereof?
Loss of power steering and red fluid all over ground
This was me. They replaced my transmission and I've had the car back for under a week. Today as I was parking, I suddenly lost all power steering. After wrestling the car into a parking spot, I got out and saw red fluid all over the ground. Pools of it. [more inside]
What options are out there for a dawn simulator?
My 8 year old dawn simulator lost all of its magic smoke this summer, and now that darkness is looming, I'm looking for a replacement. Since incandescent bulbs are out of the picture, what are my best options? [more inside]
I wish I had time to thank you properly...
In the midst of a massively over-scheduled month from hell, my car (which I absolutely need for work/school/etc.) needs to go to the mechanic for at least a week. A friend is very kindly lending me her car. My question: how do I thank her? I have no time to do anything thoughtful (wash it, detail it, etc.), but I'm so appreciative. I'm happy to spend some money for this, but on what?
How do I shelf?
I’ve just moved into a new rental apartment. I’d like to put up shelves capable of holding a desktop computer, monitor, books, and myself as I lean against it as a standing desk. The problem is I have no idea how to determine what kind of shelving I can put in. [more inside]
Does CASL mean that I can't send cold emails?
If I send emails to potential clients that I haven't made contact with before to let them know about my services, would that violate CASL? My potential clients are people who are accountants and I'd only be contacting those who had their information available on their website. Is this something that would that be allowed under "implied consent, conspicuous publication", assuming that what I'd be contacting them about is relevant to their business?
Books about whether to have a baby
I'm contemplating whether I want to have a baby in the next three to five years. Obviously, it's a lot of work. It also seems interesting. How do I decide if it's worth it? Looking for books relevant to thinking this through. [more inside]
Is it possible there are RAW files somewhere?
So I got back from a round the world trip where I took a lot of photos. Normally I shoot RAW but as I'm going through all the pics now on my mac in Photos they're showing up as JPGs. And there's no option to edit in RAW. It's possible I reset the camera and it went back to a raw default but I don't think so. Is there anywhere else these shots would be in RAW form on my computer?
Five days or so that includes lions and elephants
I have an unexpected opportunity to visit South Africa in late October/early November. I have work stuff for a week and then I can stay on for up to a week and do some sightseeing. I really want to see lions and elephants in the wild. But the number of possible places and tours to do this on is overwhelming. Can anyone give some personal recommendations? [more inside]
What should I play now that I've finished Dots & Co?
I've completed level 550 of Dots & Co. Yay! Wait, no, boo! Can you suggest games for Android (free preferred, but happy to pay if its great) that scratch that same itch? [more inside]
"top 20" style article about debating/discussing with men?
I'm looking for an article (Buzzfeed, maybe?) that contained a bulleted list of tactics (some) men (allegedly) use when debating with women. It included items like "shift the goalposts" but it was *not* a generic list of debate fallacies. It was, admittedly, a biased listicle, but boy did it describe a very specific situation I observed recently, and I'd like to reread it while cursing and shaking a tiny fist at the universe. Perhaps you can help me find it? [more inside]
What are you dancing to lately?
It need not be new, and I'm genre-agnostic on this one, but it needs to be something that makes you want to dance (or run - gym music is fine too). Some very minor further comments inside. [more inside]
3D printing software that can split one VWRL file into multiple parts
I'm working on a project where we take an automatically generated object, load it into Materialise’s Magics then use the Split Part by Color [sic] function to make it into multiple parts. I'm trying to write up our procedure for other people to use, but Magics costs something like $40K. Are there cheaper/free alternatives that can do the same thing? [more inside]
How to remove stickers from car without damaging them?
I recently bought a new vehicle (well, new for me). I have some stickers on my old truck that I would love to transfer to the new one. I realize that it might be an exercise in futility! However, I need to remove them before I sell the truck anyway, so why not try? What I would like to know is whether I should attempt this on a hot afternoon when the stickers/adhesive are softer or in the morning when everything is cool? Any success stories out there? Thanks!
Parenting dispute re: playground bullies
What to do with kiddo gets pushed around at the playground? [more inside]
I want to be able to hand letter things like they did in the 1960s.
Sort of a long follow up from this question: I would like to learn how to do hand lettering like they did back before computers. My ultimate goal is to make signs or posters that are evocative of the era. Maybe even some amateur sign painting? How do I learn how to do this? [more inside]
Guide for Interacting with Muslim Women in Professional Environment?
I am very comfortable traveling in the Muslim world (have lived in South Asia for several years). However, I am now in the position of organizing a professional exchange, whereby an Indonesian policymaker (a Muslim woman) will be spending two months at a U.S. organization doing a job-shadowing experience in a very specific scientific field. The organization has asked if I have any guides they could pass out to their staff on "do's and don'ts" for interacting with relatively conservative Muslim women. Any ideas? [more inside]
Is this smartphone antiquated, dying or is it a service provider issue?
I have been using a Moto X 2nd generation (~2014) for the last 3-4 years and it's been a great phone. Lately though things have been iffy, and I can't seem to figure out what the problem is. [more inside]
Presents to inspire someone to travel to Israel
I would like to get a meaningful gift for a man who is in his 60's and has expressed a great amount of passion around the idea of someday going to Israel. He is Jewish. I am about 25 years younger, and consider him a friend/mentor. I would like to give him an appropriate gift (or group of gifts) that might inspire him to take the plunge and visit. I am not Jewish or Israeli. Please help!
Replacement Remote for orbit
I'd like a replacement remote for a six station orbit system. Link to a picture of the controller.Thank you for your time.
On skin, sex, and teenage girls
My teen daughters looks good in, and like to wear, revealing clothing. Help me guide them and figure out my own feelings about this. [more inside]
Where can I find this particular type of foam mounting bracket hardware?
I need to insulate the ceiling of my unfinished garage. I'd like to hang 2-inch Expanded Polystyrene but instead of installing nails or screws with foam washers, I'd like to install with tracks like this (another view and the YouTube video where I saw them).
The problem is that I can't find these tracks for sale anywhere. Can anyone help me figure out what this product is called and/or who manufactures or sells it? I've already reached out to the company in the video, but it's been a couple weeks with no response.
Summertime...and the kitten is coughing. Why?
Our tiny, 7/8ths scale adult 16y/o cat has been having hairball like coughing episodes for several weeks. Our vet did a routine exam/blood draw & we played them some footage of a coughing episode. The vet more or less shrugged. Since then, we have been regularly treating her with hairball paste with no improvement. [more inside]
11-week old Rhodesian Ridgeback puppy and 5.5 yr old human boy!
I've read tons of the puppy biting questions and they are so helpful. However, we have the added twist of a 5.5 yr old super active and physical young boy. I'd love some advice or even a pep talk that this will work out. [more inside]
Please help my preschooler have good taste in Jamaican music?
My kiddo, who is almost four, was in the car with me this weekend when a local station's Jamaican music show (which is pretty genre-mixed) came on. Kiddo usually likes music but in a pretty non-specific way, but she lost her mind with joy at every song and demanded we stay in the car for the rest of the show, grinning from ear to ear the entire time. She clearly needs some more of this kind of music in her life. Direct me, please! [more inside]
Currently mid-flight to Japan, and realized my passport is expired
I grabbed the wrong passport on my way out the door this morning, and no one at security noticed. I have a second valid US passport, but it's sitting in a drawer at home. I land in 10 hours. What can I do between now and then to help rectify this situation? Or am I just amazingly screwed.
Q: What is Phil Collins calling his reunion tour?
A: ReGenesis. I want to get a copy of my very favorite TV show before it's lost to the sands of time. I fear I may be too late. That show is ReGenesis. [more inside]
Insomnia Recovery?
I've had pretty severe insomnia for the last four years. I've tried medications, sleep restriction, intense exercise, meditation, and nothing has stopped the 2AM wake up. After I wake up, I generally can't fall back asleep. [more inside]
Possibly Dodgy Paradigm-Shifting Mega Theories
I'm trying to compile a list of improbably brash, would-be paradigm-shifting, broadly integrative theories from otherwise brilliant and respected figures that have been neither definitively/universally proven nor disproven. [more inside]
High quality photo mug
I would like to give my dear friend a mug with a cute photo of us on it, but I despise the type of mug most photo places use because it's so cheap and thick and inelegant. My ideal mug is thin-walled, taller, and has a more delicate handle. Have you ever seen such a thing available as a photo mug? Or anything else you like better than the generic mugs widely used?
Where do I go this weekend?
Based in Berlin and trying to narrow down a few options. [more inside]
Correcting a credit report
I recently closed a credit account. [more inside]
Help my sister find this book!
About 10 years ago my sister read a science fiction novel, and wants to find it again. She read it about 10 years ago, but it could have been published any time before that, she doesn't remember if it was a recent publication. It possibly had the word "Pegasus" in the title. Plot below the fold [more inside]
I need a crash course in industrial design
I have a nice home shop and I know how to use it. My problem is that when I'm designing things, I feel like I'm always reinventing the wheel, and usually doing a worse job. Googling stuff is always really hard because I don't know the right term for what I'm looking for. [more inside]
Daily life on December 7, 1941
This past week with the anniversary of 9/11 got me wondering, what was life like for civilians living in Hawaii during the Pearl Harbor attack? [more inside]
Books similar to Gunnerkrigg Court
Our ten-year-old is a reluctant reader. I gave her some of my Gunnerkrigg Court books and she tore through them. I'm looking for other books that might have the same appeal. Any recommendations? [more inside]
Overcoming Anxiety for Terrible Tasks?
Lately, I've been struggling to deal with Terrible Tasks with eloborate procastination and dodging reasons. How do I learn to overcome my flaw? [more inside]
Planning around older hard drives
I have a number of hard drives, both internal and external, attached to my old desktop. Some are getting old, and are somewhat small by today’s standards. What’s the lifespan of platter hard drives? What about drives that are off 99% of the time? [more inside]
I can't stop... [dubstep noises]
...Snacking. I snack a lot. Protein bars make me lose my appetite, but otherwise I graze all day and it makes me bloated. Any tips? [more inside]
Building a playlist for a tough time
So the next 49 days are going to be really intense for me, and I need music that will keep my spirits up, and that I also don't have a lot of previous associations with. Please hope me! [more inside]
September 16
File management with workplace Google docs
My employer is strongly pushing for us to do everything on a workplace Google Docs account. Should I still keep backups on my personal computer? [more inside]
Go Pro Buying
For those who have a Go Pro, what are your experiences and advice for the Go Pro and essential accessories . Also, software questions. [more inside]
Help me help someone get back into Gmail on Chrome
So my best friend, in a medicated haze, logged herself out of Gmail in Chrome on a Mac, and doesn't remember the password. She is still logged in on her iPhone, but that's inconvenient for many reasons. Help me get her logged back in -- I think this is simple but there are some mitigating factors. See inside. [more inside]
Help filling a hole in the wall, hanging a guitar??
So I'm screwing some hefty drywall anchors in the wall, managed to get two in and putting in a couple more I accidentally tear a few smallish-biggish holes (1/4 inch about) that I'd love to fill up and screw back into and hang a guitar from.
Is it possible with just some sort of filler/spackle?? I'm reading a MILLION different solutions, some even conflicting with each other, and I cannot for the life of me figure out which one's correct.
To whom do you report a typo in a ebook?
I just finished a novel that I enjoyed and found a type in the Kindle ebook edition. To whom do I report the typo so that it will get correct in future editions?
Where should I store my writing: 2018 edition
I want to start writing again. I want read/write access to my content via both my iPhone (with and without a Bluetooth keyboard) and my Windows 10 laptop. This makes me think I need a web-based application to allow for syncing between devices. What apps/services/options work best these days? [more inside]
How do I efficiently turn a Word doc into an eBook and a print book?
If I'm starting from a Word doc, how can I maintain one document and minimize the amount of work to turn that document into both an eBook and a Print book? [more inside]
Car Me Up! (New Commuter Vehicle Needed)
So, I have a new job starting up soon, and with it, a commute that cannot be done with public transportation. I currently have no car at all, but I have reliable anytime-access to a RAV4 when I need it for grocery runs or long road trips or bad weather, etc. I have started the test drive process. A couple of top contenders: The Chevy Bolt, and the Mini Cooper. [more inside]
Help a first time solo traveler plan a 10 day foodie trip to Italy
Hi,
I'm a first time 27 yo American male solo traveler and have the last week of October and first week of November off. I'd like to plan a trip to Italy, but I have no idea what I'm doing and am lowkey terrified. [more inside]
Mixed Drink for a Too Sour Beer
My wife and I have acquired a six-pack of beer that is too sour for us, but we don't want to throw away the other 5 cans. Any suggestions on ways to make it more palatable? Fun cocktails or milkshakes or what have you? [more inside]
I don't want to feel resentful towards my boyfriend for money reasons
I often have to give my boyfriend money to see him to the end of the month. It isn't his fault that he can't make ends meet at the moment, and I have the spare cash to do this without feeling the pinch. But increasingly when I do this I feel resentful. I feel an utter heel for feeling this way (which unhelpfully can feed back into the resentfulness). Any advice on managing these emotions would be most gratefully received. [more inside]
Kid books where school is fun?
Seeking books (especially in a series) for my advanced reader first grader that portray school positively. [more inside]
Help me stop a family embezzlement
My parents are heading toward separation or divorce, and I believe my dad is stealing maternal estate assets and inheritance from my mom and hiding them possibly in preparation to leave the country. She is overwhelmed and has asked for my help. How do I intervene and secure the estate? This is in central Virginia. [more inside]
Inheritance, mortgages, deadline and have no clue!
So my last living parent needs my signature for a mortgage on the parental house, so another house can be bought urgently for older sibling, and gave me one week for this. Family relationships are complicated and I have chosen to have only little contact for the last 10 years. I want to do this carefully since I cannot count on other parties in that regard. What information should I ask for, and what should I consider before signing? [more inside]
Feeding a furry little dictator at 4 a.m. sucks. Help fix it?
The cat who allows my caregivers' family and I occupy the same home as he does is an asshole. He wakes my primary caregiver up between 3 and 5 every morning to eat. It's affecting her quality of life, which, in turn, affects mine. [more inside]
Resources for evaluating supervisors
My workplace has no culture or history of evaluating supervisors/managers. I'd like to change that, starting with myself. About six months ago, I took over a team of about 40 people, and I'd like to conduct some kind of evaluation of my work as a manager, identify weak spots, etc. I think this would have to be a largely anonymous exercise - my organization's hierarchical nature make me think that my team would be reluctant to be sincere about my shortcomings to my face. Are there any resources/guides for carrying out this kind of evaluation? I have identified another section of the company that would be willing to carry out the process itself, i.e., organize a survey, tabulate results, what have you, but we feel at a loss as to what kinds of questions are most important to be asked, etc. Any pointers?
Oil to natural gas - not as simple as it used to be
Help us weigh the economic vs the social and environmental impact of natural gas. [more inside]
What are the best Bollywood music videos?
What are the best Bollywood music videos of all time? I would love to watch some pop music from India.
Recommended books about an idea of uniformity?
I'm interest to learn more about rise
of uniformity during 17th and 18th century and its application in the culture, science and society. [more inside]
Best Magnetic Hooks for Vertical Sheer
What are the best magnetic hooks I can buy on the internet that withstand vertical sheering? i.e. Putting the hooks on the side of something vertical and hanging something heavy from them. Looking to hang a shelving unit that will be about 15-20 lbs. Science questions inside. [more inside]
transportation from the Brooklyn IKEA a.k.a. minor hell?
I am buying a bookcase and a dresser from Brooklyn IKEA for my Brooklyn apartment. Please throw ideas/annecdata/sage Wisdom at me re: transporting them home. [more inside]
It's time for the perculator
I'm looking for a fully washable coffee maker (i.e., all parts that come into contact with water and/or coffee should be removable, or at least accessible with a sponge). [more inside]
Resources on the extremely powerful emotional pull of photographs?
When people are asked the one thing they would save in a house fire, it’s usually photographs. [more inside]
Recommend a toddler-proof bluetooth speaker?
Something to stand up to a lot of punishment [more inside]
Is this social-media/SEO specialist taking advantage?
I work for a small family-run business (<10 employees). There is a friend of one of the employees who was hired for their marketing/SEO experience to establish and maintain our social media accounts, and manage SEO on our website. I was informed what this person is billing and wondering if this sounds fair. [more inside]
How to be a good art jury?
I’m an artist working in the field of digital arts. I was invited as a guest jury at an art gallery which is currently preparing a show for Black History Month.
As I’m white, I feel uncomfortable at the idea that I will be judging artworks by POC. I cannot refuse the position (I did not know about the show before accepting), and I do hope that I’d be able to showcase great art by talented artists.
I’m afraid however that my “good intentions” are not enough. Is there anything I can read/do to prepare? To be sensitive to realities that escape me?
Thank you very much
September 15
Help me cut steaks or shish kebabs on the grill for my FIL's birthday
This is our grill, the Spirit II.
It's Tuesday, and I work all day, and so does Mr. Llama, but we'd like to make it nice for him. I do not have much experience with grilling. [more inside]
Automate my life
Assume, hypothetically, I can afford to make as much of my life as easy as possible for my burnt out, chronically ill self? What do I do? [more inside]
How much and what kind of effort should I put into avoiding C. Diff.?
My partner is a nurse on a psychiatric unit at a hospital (ie. without the types of isolation precautions or materials you might find on a medical/surgical unit). Last night she was exposed to two patients with possible C. Diff. I really don't want to get C. Diff. What precautions are reasonable? [more inside]
My _________ brings all the adults to the library
Would you please talk to me about strategies to promote adult education programs in public libraries? Do you know of any good articles/research on this topic? Have you designed successful engagement aimed at adults? Can you point me toward programs you think are being promoted particularly well? [more inside]
What does this bad kiss mean?
Is a bad kiss indicitive of poor chemistry or can things be changed? Anecdotes? [more inside]
Hot leftovers straight into the fridge?
I was taught to let leftovers cool to room temperature before putting them in the refrigerator or freezer, but it has occurred to me that I have no idea why. Is it for food safety reasons? Is it to help the tupperware last longer? Is it to save on refrigerator electricity bills (this seems the most plausible, but how much of a difference would it actually make?)? Is it something else entirely? Or is it just one of those entirely baseless pieces of "wisdom" that gets passed down forever?
The Planters Peanut is One Option
I have a monocle and a tophat. What should I 'go as' for Halloween?
LED bulbs and dimmer switches
I have 3 light bulbs on a switch with a dimmer. I accidentally bought non-dimmable LED bulbs to replace the incandescents, turning my entryway into a discotheque (warning: strobing lights). However, when I put in a single incandescent and 2 LEDs, all the lights function fine - the LEDs take a half second longer to switch on, but no discernable flickering after that. Why does this work? Is it okay to keep them like this, or do I need to go back to the store and buy some dimmable bulbs? (I never use the dimmer so this is is a slightly annoying extra cost for me)
Where and How to Make a Bootable Thumbdrive for Mac
I am planning on selling my old Macbook pro (2013 ish.) I erased the drive so well the software is completely gone. I tried holding down the option key so I could connect to wi-fi but it won't successfully do that. I am guessing I need to create a bootable disk to re-install the ios?
I can't even find a spot where the software can be downloaded and the help videos are less than clear...at least for me.
How to keep up your stamina in a demanding job?
I recently started a job that is, in many ways, an absolute dream. However, it can also be demanding, taxing, and the hours can be long. How can I keep up my energy and stamina while working an intense job? [more inside]
Tokyo or Seoul For Solo Traveler: Or Both?
I was originally planning to vacation in Tokyo for 2 weeks end Oct, but having been there before, figured Seoul would be a more adventurous option. But now I find myself swinging back in favor of Tokyo, and I think I need some help. [more inside]
Brooklyn Political organization recommendations?
I recently enjoyed volunteering on a campaign and would like to get more politically involved. Any recommendations for Brooklyn-based Democratic organizations? [more inside]
Wedding reading: food and wine?
Are there any passages from a piece of writing about food or wine which you would read at a wedding? Food- or wine-centred fiction also acceptable. [more inside]
Flavor Affinities for Pawpaws
I'm making pawpaw ice cream tonight, and of course, there's no listing for it in the flavor bible. Help? [more inside]
Best Enterprise Antivirus for Dummies?
Please recommend great enterprise level anti-virus/anti-malware options for a rapidly growing business with 200 users spread over 12 - 20 sites. [more inside]
Bookkeeping 101 book for a writer doing research.
I am a playwright developing a story about a character that keeps the books in a small retail store. I know nothing on this subject. She’d be in charge of payroll and paying bills. I need a basic introductory book on whatever category of accounting this falls under. I mean, real fundamentals so that I can get ahold of the proper language and better understand core responsibilities. Suggestions welcomed! Thanks.
wedding readings and vows not fixated on individual romantic love?
I'm participating in a U.S.-style wedding soon and my fiancee wants me to find a meaningful passage and a vow to read aloud during the ceremony. I'm looking for something which speaks of marriage as a alliance of two families, as a partnership in the work of caring for ourselves and our parents and our children, as a considered union of our previously separate prospects, skills, and desires. Hope me? [more inside]
How do I deal with feeling left out?
Am I even being reasonable here? Should I just let this one go? [more inside]
How do you deal with implicit bias when it could affect you?
It turns out that implicit bias makes it harder to do many things when you're not a white male, including getting interviews for jobs, riding the bus, and even getting restaurant recommendations from your hotel. How do you actually deal with this? [more inside]
What would Martha Stewart do?
I bought this gift bag filled with lavender-scented goodies at the farmer's market primarily for the oil and dried lavender. It came with these (what I assume are) dried stems. What do I do with the stems? Are they purely decorative?
What is this worm thing and did it come from my dog?
Found a couple weird worms(larvae??) in my dog's crate with him, which is also coincidentally underneath a giant houseplant. Not sure what kind of worm it is and whether it came from the plant or the dog. Pics included inside. [more inside]
What are the best Black TV shows to watch?
I've realized that I have fallen completely out of touch with Black TV over the last couple decades but I just read the hollywoodreporter article on Kenya Barris, the creator of Blackish, and he mentioned being a writer on 'The Game' and I had never heard of it so I looked it up and it is definitely something I would at least try.
What else should I queue up? [more inside]
Singing one song to another's tune
What's a song that you can sing over another's tune that fits impeccably, unexpectedly well?
Non-Racist Halloween Costumes
For a white person, is Gamora from Guardians of the Galaxy an acceptable Halloween costume? [more inside]
how to not overengineer woodworking projects
We've been doing woodworking projects lately, but we're relative newbs with no idea how to decide how much load any given structure can hold. So we tend toward overengineering. Are there some standard calculations or rules of thumb people use when deciding what size wood to use? [more inside]
Recommend me a bass amp for noodling around at work
I would like to start messing around on my bass again. I'd like a recommendation on an amp that I can use at work so I won't disturb anyone else, for those times when I just want to keep my fingers busy when I'm thinking. [more inside]
Lampshade for the tall and lanky
We have two tall, lanky lamps (Imgur gallery) and that have insufficiently long lampshades. One is passable, but the other looks a bit Seussian in proportions. Where can we get better proportioned shades? [more inside]
Novels like “Thank You All Very Much”?
I am very fond of Margaret Drabble’s novel “Thank You All Very Much” (also published as “The Millstone”), but when I have tried Margaret Drabble’s other novels I have found them relatively uninteresting. Can you recommend any other books with commonalities to “Thank You All Very Much” (in particular, with a similar voice and/or wit to its narrator), whether authored by Drabble or not?
Gentle audiobooks for little kids?
I'm looking for recommendations of audiobooks/books on tape for a young child where conflict/tension is about as low as a functional plot allows. For example: The Gruffalo is okay, except that the "slice of bread" line generally gets a comment, and we often are asked to skip the page with the "terrible beast" in Room on the Broom. [more inside]
Is my MIL at risk of being scammed here?
My mother-in-law’s new-ish friend “Charlie” has borrowed money from her several times, but always returned the loan. Now Charlie is abroad and in trouble and needs money sent over urgently. I have concerns. [more inside]
Qigong Training Retreats
Qigong exercise has captured our interest; now we would like to pursue Qigong more deeply. Dead ends abound. Guidance sought. [more inside]
Pretend to still like friend's abusive spouse to help her leave?
Pretend to still like friend's abusive spouse to help her leave? story beneath the fold [more inside]
What's the best overnight experience I can have between LA and SF?
I'm travelling from overseas to California for meetings, flying into LA and out of SF. I've only been a handful of times, so I wanted to drive between the two cities, ideally along the coast, but I have super limited time and only one night to break up the drive. Where's the best place to stop along the way for some quality R&R overnight? Happy to splurge here. Spa/water features a bonus!
September 14
Working for a school district and the cost of living
Has anyone worked for a school? Not as a teacher but as other staff. Did they offer you health benefits? How do I estimate salary asks? Also, if you've lived in the place below the fold, could you give me insight for cost of living? [more inside]
Car-free and affordable?
Are there any downtowns in the U.S. where it's possible to buy a condo for under $150K (or rent for under $1,000), where somebody can live completely car free? It can be a small town or a big city. My main criteria are: walkable for everyday life stuff, like groceries, and a decent place to live. [more inside]
Help me know what I don't know about music
I've received literally no music instruction at all in my lifetime. I didn't even know the difference between rock and pop until I was 18. I want to make my own music, but I've struggled to put the bits and pieces I'm learning (synthesis, music theory, composition, etc) together into an integrated mental framework. [more inside]
What is the time frame to apply and begin law school?
I'm considering going to law school. When would I need to submit my application to start in fall 2019? When is the latest I would need to take the LSAT?
Caffeine sensitivity, hours later?
Can caffeine sensitivity symptoms show up inconsistently, and hours after consuming caffeine? The last two times I've had coffee or black tea after mid-afternoon, I've noticed anxiety and elevated heart rate, and feel my blood pounding... four to six hours later. However, I have a cup of coffee with breakfast daily and feel fine. [more inside]
Your favorite Insight Timer meditations
I use Insight Timer for guided meditation almost every night before bed. I found some meditations that I enjoy but, I’d be really interested to experiment with a wider range.
If you use this app, what are your favorite meditations? What about them appeals to you? How and for what do you use them?
Thanks!
What is this logo?
Friends: received a gross of these for free to pass out as gag gifts (decorated with lights). Now feel uncertain - what is F.O.G? What is the logo? Internet says Fear of God and Fat Oil and Grease, not very festive.
Uber data
Help me tech support my dad: last couple months he keeps running out of cellular data. I'm visiting and checked his iphone and it says the Uber app used 1.5 GB, and App store used 13.1 GB. Everything else is in the MB or KB range. I just turned off data use for the App store (so he can only use when in wifi) but he needs to have data access for Uber since he uses it out and about. Why would it suck up so much data? Lyft used much less this month. [more inside]
How can we simulate UV damage on materials for an experiment?
Should we just get large lights? [more inside]
Things To Do Outside Denver Before I'm Dead
Next week, I have two free days starting in the Denver area, and I'd like to explore the Rocky Mountain National Park. My main interests: viewing stunning wilderness and sensible solo hikes. Is there a tourist-friendly loop I could drive? I was thinking Denver - Loveland Pass - Aspen, but Google Maps suggests heading back to Denver along the same roads, and I'd like to get a change of scenery if possible. [more inside]
To Live and Die in LA...and be cremated also?
I am shopping for cremation services for a death that'll happen in the next few days/weeks, in Los Angeles. What do I need to know? [more inside]
iTunes with a Chromebook -- Advisable? Annoying? Impossible?
I've found that Chromebook can offer (or handle) Microsoft Office, and Adobe Premiere, and a Final Draft-like app called Writer Duet, which all sounds good. But the one problem I'm running into is iTunes. [more inside]
Name my wedding officiating service
I'm a Humanist Minister creating and performing weddings, funerals, baby namings, and other rite-of-passage ceremonies in New England (U.S.). My current identity/name covers all of the above. After hearing from a number of wedding vendors that the name is a buzz-kill for engaged couples, I've decided to separate out the wedding identity from the rest. [more inside]
Fair market value of life insurance question
I've read that the fair market value of life insurance must be calculated for "business valuation, estate planning and business succession".
What exactly does "business valuation, estate planning and business succession" mean? I guess I'm wondering if someone can explain like I'm five what these circumstances mean and why the calculation is needed in these cases?
Also, I'm not sure if it matters or not, but in case it does, I'm located in Canada. Thanks!
As a Contractor in a Consulting role, do I get any Paternity Leave?
Soon to be father here. Wife is due first week of November. I work as an IT Project manager for a big company but I'm contracted through a consulting agency. I work full-time at least 40 hours a week and I've nearly been with them a year this mid-December. I'm looking into what my Paternity options would be. [more inside]
Lake Chelan or Lake Wenatchee for an extended vacation
If you can spend 3 to 4 weeks at a lake which would be a better option: lake Chelan or Lake Wenatchee? Which is more beautiful, has more wildlife, more liberal and tolerant people, has more technical amenities such as internet access if one has to work? [more inside]
New York voting after moving
If I move too close to an election for a change-of-address to take effect in time, can I legally vote at my old polling place? [more inside]
How to find an apartment in metro DC area?
It has been 16 years since I last had to find an apartment. I used the newspaper and printed guides to find one! I need to find one now, and I have no idea where to start. I am in the metropolitan DC area, and do not want to live in the city. I'd like to live in Montgomery County MD or Fairfax County VA. How do I find an apartment? What websites do I look at? What information do I need to have for applications?
What cool stuff can I do with the data from my mood tracking app?
I use Mood Log to track my feelings, and have 2 years of data. The app allows you to export to a CSV file with columns for Date, Time, Mood (a number from 1 to 10), Tags (which is a list of adjectives separated by commas for each entry) and Notes.
How can I garner insights from this data, like what days or months I am most or least happy? I have average proficiency in Excel and am willing to consider a use a paid service if one exists.
Using a range cord for a dryer
Anyone have experience with appliance cords? Can we use an appliance cord (or range cord) with a dryer without causing safety concerns? We bought a new dryer and in the process discovered that prior owners had installed a range outlet instead of a dryer outlet. The dryer is here and has a proper 3-prong dryer cord attached but cannot be plugged in. We could either get an electrician to swap out the outlet, or buy a range/appliance cord for the dryer and continue to use the existing outlet.
Anyone know enough about this to say if this is a safety hazard or just a compatibility/future convenience issue? [more inside]
Text-only versions of news sites?
I just found out that there is a super-stripped down version of the npr.org homepage and was wondering if there were other news or popular sites that have something similar? [more inside]
New deck: stain/seal right away or wait?
I have a beautiful new deck. The moisture level of the boards is below 15 percent, but water beads up on the surface. Should I stain and seal right away or wait? [more inside]
Letters of recommendation for a TT job: is Interfolio OK?
I'm finally ready to apply for tenure track jobs in my field, creative writing/English. My question is, how are letters of recommendation typically handled for these jobs? Is it enough to get my recommenders to write a single letter and upload it to a dossier service like Interfolio, or does the letter need to be tailored to each individual job? [more inside]
What is biting me?
I live in the Richmond VA area - a suburban house with a heavily wooded backyard and a large deck. The last few nights when taking the dog out at night I've come back in with 3 or 4 red, itchy welts on my legs. [more inside]
Great children's books with challenging/rare/intricate concepts? Go!
I was really inspired by the "question on children books with intricate illustrations". Following on- what are your favourite young children's books that cover 'difficult to describe' concepts? Examples follow... [more inside]
Folding Bikes in 2018–What to look for?
I might be in the market for a folding bike to speed up the walking parts of my train commute. This is in the Boston area, and I’d be looking for something largely year-round. What’s good? [more inside]
White powder in the corner of my bedroom on walls and floor?
I was about to go to bed when I happened to notice what looked like some powder in the corner on the floor. Upon closer inspection, the powder is coming from the walls. Photos after the jump. [more inside]
seventies US TV movie featuring a haunted precolumbian mask?
I have fragmentary memories of a late-70s TV movie featuring a haunted precolombian mask found in the course of the narrative by the tween, male, protagonist while freediving a reef in the Caribbean. [more inside]
My CPAP machine is making my sleep even worse.
CPAP machines; please tell me it gets better with these things or that there's something I can do differently, because I'm at my wit's end and getting worse. [more inside]
September 13
How much rainfall is bad - Hurricane Florence edition
Obviously, I am not going to take your advice instead of that of my local government officials. With that read:
We live 150 miles inland, in the track of Florence. Rainfall estimates are 10+ inches. Our house sits high on a knoll. I honestly can't imagine flood waters here. We do have max flood insurance, which I bought on a whim after watching Houston last year - I kicked myself after doing it, because this is not a flood plain and we are on high ground. So very thankful now.
Deciding whether to stay tomorrow or go. Anyone have been there-done that type stories to share? We have bottled water to last probably five days, and water purification tablets for the lake nearby. [more inside]
How do I help a coworker learn to speak up?
I have a colleague who tends to speak really quietly, mumble, and trail off at the end of sentences. This leads to people (including me) asking her pretty much every time she says something to speak up so we can understand her. As her mentor (and for everyone's sake), I want to find ways to help. Tips/advice/resources? [more inside]
Power of Attorney - flow of assignment
In the POA, there is a statement "If John Smith is unable or unwilling to serve as my Agent for any reason..."
My question is this, how is John Smith deemed unable or unwilling to serve? If he is no longer alive, I understand how the assignment flows. If he is alive, who or what determines that he is unable to serve? And if unwilling, how is that substantiated?
Is there another legal document required to pass over the first assignee in a POA chain of assignments?
Any insight would be appreciated!
SandPine
If you had five books to educate yourself from start to finish, which?
I'm interested in how Abraham Lincoln self-educated with specific regard to the books he chose to do so. The common story is he got most of his education from "Euclid, Shakespeare, and the King James Bible." I'm want to read books that have extremely high auto-didactive value, that have historically been influential and preferably can instruct in more than one area.
More follows. [more inside]
Refinancing student loans while back in school
Help. My husband has a crazy-high variable interest rate (14.5%!) on approx. $25K private student loan from his first attempt, which ended in 2010 without graduating. We're being told that since he's back in school now (different university) he can't refinance. We're racking up over $300/mo on this loan, alone. Are we really trapped? [more inside]
Accessible tourist spots in Toronto
My Dad and his wife are currently visiting and we can't think of anything to do on the weekend. His wife uses a walker and can't really navigate steps or walk for more than a block or two. They went to Niagara Falls today and are doing a half day city bus tour tomorrow, which I assume covers most of the touristy stuff downtown. Help me! [more inside]
Roaches. Why'd it have to be roaches.
There are dead roaches in my attic. I want to know how long they've been there. [more inside]
I kicked a metaphorical hornet's nest today. Help me soothe my stings?
I'm part of a community of let's say professional teapot makers. The male owner of a teapot manufacturing firm who is an event organizer treated me Very Badly in a gendered way several months ago. This happened when I was volunteering at a teapot event that he organized. I finally made a formal complaint to the national group of teapot event organizers and teapot standard setters and am waiting to see what comes of it. Help me be calm and be prepared for what might be coming. throwaway email - teapot.problems@gmail.com [more inside]
I need Facebook to de-integrate from Instagram
I admin several pages on Facebook, which happens through my personal account. I also have Instagram, through which I've logged in to those Facebook pages in order to have the Instagram post go to Facebook automatically. But as a result I think Instagram is encouraging people who know me *on Facebook* to follow me *on Instagram*. I'm not happy with this. Any options? [more inside]
Life needs to stop finding a way
We don't keep our doors open. Windows all have screens. No food left out. Dishes done daily. Trash taken out regularly. Litterboxes clean. The house in GENERAL is clean. No dead bodies in the basement. And yet we are still bothered by flies and have been for weeks now. Where the heck are they coming from? [more inside]
Memoirs of life under fascism....
I'm looking for first-person memoirs by people who lived in fascist countries, but were (at least initially) members of the group in power, not a persecuted minority.... that is, I want to hear from the Germans, not the Jews. [more inside]
Standing/sitting desk: Cintiq edition!
I’ve been through the previous asks on the subject, and watched various performance videos, but my needs are not typical. I could use some insight from Folks That Actually Own Them. How wobbly is “wobbly”? Can you use a manual eraser while standing? And will bringing my monster Cintiq to the front edge make it unstable? [more inside]
Graphic Novel/Art Book Storage
I have one bookshelf's worth of large graphic novels and space for one bookshelf in my living room. What can I get that looks better than a Billy or Kallax shelf from Ikea but will be able to handle the weight of the comics? [more inside]
Looking for Reading Materials for a 2nd/3rd Grade Level
Many decades ago, I remember classrooms had a file cabinet of "reading cards" which were a single page of text -- a story followed by some comprehension questions to check to make sure a student understood the story (or at least parts of it). What exists like this now? [more inside]
Alcohol, Alzheimer's, and A Neighbor
There is a sweet, elderly lady who lives in our neighborhood who occasionally stops by, has some water, chit chats, borrows a bottle of wine, and goes on her merry way. This used to happen once every month or so. It has happened three days in a row this week. What is our best course of action? [more inside]
Watch me not watch my phone with a watch
I’d like to get the new Apple Watch and keep my existing phone at home as much as possible (using little data, hopefully.) What’s the cheapest way to do this in the US? I’m currently on prepaid but have the credit for post-paid, and I live in a big enough city that pretty much any carrier or MNVO should work. Speed isn’t as important as reliable connectivity. I potentially can move to a Verizon family plan as the 6th member.
Is there a carrier that won't auto-delete my voice messages?
I have t-mobile and am sick of how they auto-delete my voicemails. [more inside]
Trivia with friends
We have a bunch of friends that we like to play trivia with, but we are scattered across Ontario and getting together at pubs isn't convenient. I wonder if there is an app or website where we can each take turns being QuizMaster, and set up our own questions, teams, and the like. [more inside]
Recent Experiences with a Tankless Gas Water Heater?
Our hot water heater is old and we’ve decided to replace it. We’re trying to decide between swapping it out for an updated version of what we have or replace it with a more efficient (and more expensive) tankless water heater. Our plumber recommends a Navien NPE-A series heater. [more inside]
Better Email Program for Mac?
Search on Mail.app seems completely broken for me, and the posted fixes I've found don't work. Google, as far as I can tell, does not offer a desktop app, only an iOS app.
What is your favorite program for reading Google mail on your Mac?
Help me find a particular article on hiring underrepresented minorities
Within the last six months or so, I read an article (probably a blog post) written by a member of an underrepresented minority about hiring for diversity and inclusion and now I'm having trouble finding it again. [more inside]
Do you have a fave pressure cooker Aloo Gobi recipe?
I want to make Aloo Gobi, preferably in a pressure cooker! I'm a complete Aloo Gobi novice! Do you have a recipe you love that you'd like to share? (caveat that I probably won't be able to source every ingredient, so somewhat less complicated is probably better than high-difficulty) [more inside]
I'm worrying about pillowcases
Is sleeping on a satin pillowcase going to be offputting to skeptics? [more inside]
What's the best meal to make for someone in a rough time?
I signed up to make a meal for a coworker going through a rough time, but I'm not a very confident cook and now I'm not sure what to do. What's a good go-to recipe that I can make the night before and bring to work with me before stopping at their house? [more inside]
Will nut butter make heavy fat cream freezable?
I have a pot of clotted cream in my fridge. I mixed in some almond butter, which made an extremely satisfying 'fat bomb' snack - a teaspoonfull is all you need - but I can't eat a whole pot before it expires! A lot of fat bomb recipes involve mixing ingredients together (the fat is usually coconut oil) and then freezing them, can I do the same with this combination? The company doesn't advise freezing clotted cream alone, but would it be possible to do it if mixed with nut butter?
Hate being around my mother but have to be - how to deal?
I'm really struggling with how to have a relationship with my mother/family when my mother is emotionally immature and prone to anger/belittlement/abuse. I've had to put up a friendly/nice facade of having no feelings in order to continue being around her but this is proving increasingly difficult and she is becoming exasperated at not being able to connect with me. Meanwhile, she relies on me as one of her only (or perhaps her only) real source of emotional support. Finding this very difficult at the moment, with the result of provoking more exasperation/disappointment/anger from her. [more inside]
September 12
Good carpentry wood in the Yucatan?
I have the opportunity to have custom furniture made for a house in the Yucatan. I am personally a fan of big solid pieces of glass and wood. What wood to use is the question. [more inside]
hurricane tracker
Should I drive from Asheville, NC to the Florida panhandle this weekend, with a pit stop in ATL seeing as Hurricane Florence is moving in? Details inside. [more inside]
Watching BBC2's The City and the City in the US?
Is there any way for me to watch the BBC miniseries of China Mieville's The City and the City here in the US? It looks like it's not streaming in the UK any more, so a proxy service wouldn't help. It doesn't appear to be on Amazon, Hulu, or iTunes.
Good audiobooks for a California road trip
Hi! Boyfriend and I are driving around this beautiful state for about 8 days and I'm looking for some good audiobooks to listen to. Problem is, I don't think I like audiobooks? [more inside]
How to extend some wooden bed legs by 12-16"?
I've got a great bed frame that I like a lot, but it's quite low. I'd like to raise it by a foot or so and put some rolling storage under there. Unfortunately it seems like every bed riser out there is incredibly ugly or only "rises" a couple inches! I want to extend the wooden legs with... well, more wood. But how? [more inside]
How do I buy a sofa that will last?
It looks like the 15-year-old leather sofa at Chez DrGail will need to be replaced. The seat cushions are so broken down by now that I can't sit straight and it's very uncomfortable. While neither I nor Mr. DrGail (nor assorted dogs who join us on the sofa) are particularly heavy, the sofa gets near-daily use in our TV room. Is 15 years the most we can expect from a sofa under these conditions, or are there things we should especially look for in a replacement to assure a longer life? [more inside]
What to do in the time before baby comes?
I am due with just_duckling in 11 weeks. It will be our first. What should I be doing in my spare time between now and then to prepare? [more inside]
Crafters and/or beach bunnies, help!
I have a new one-piece swimsuit which has no padding or built-in support, and the fabric (while technically lined) is so thin I may as well go topless. I have some inserts that would solve the problem, but how do I attach them to the suit itself? More details within. [more inside]
How to navigate a convo with my (new) endocrinologist about hypogonadism
I've had (diagnosed) hypogonadism for several years now. I first was treated with a testosterone gel which was ineffective, and then later with injections at 200mg of the cypionate ester every two weeks. You are not my doctor. How do I talk to one about this therapy not really working for me? [more inside]
Rent check 'bounced' / CA tenant question
My landlady provided me with notification that my rent check has been withdrawn from her account and I'd like to figure out next steps. We bank at different institutions, but I've always deposited a check with her bank at my local branch and never had an issue until now. [more inside]
Flying into Cancun for two weeks. What do you recommend?
A close friend and I are flying into the Cancun airport at the end of the month. We have two weeks, Saturday to Saturday (to Saturday?) and there's so much to see and do. My friend will be working remotely during the day for all but 4 of the weekdays we're there, around the weekend in the middle. Where should we go and what should we do? [more inside]
NYE Euro Trip Help Please!!
Trying to make holiday plans.... [more inside]
Have you worked post on a feature film? What was your editing setup?
I'm about to start assist editing on a feature documentary. Seeking advice on the set up and technical things. [more inside]
Titania needs a PO Box
So, how can an all-thumbs dad build a mailbox for his daughter's fairy friends that will survive the elements? [more inside]
money collection for a colleague: 21st century edition
I want to collect money to fund meals for a colleague who is ill. How do I accomplish this without a manila envelope of small bills on my desk? [more inside]
Need a simle free video editor that checks all these boxes
Trying to put together a simple video of iphone clips. Below the fold is what I need. This is on a Windows 10 laptop... [more inside]
What if the Earth had a giant equatorial ocean?
Just as a thought experiment, what would the Earth be like if all the land was in the northern and southern poles, and the equator was a giant, uninterrupted ocean? [more inside]
Low cost hobbies for tinkerers?
Recently, I've enjoyed tinkering based hobbies like building a budget gaming PC and upgrading car audio. What other kind of things would I enjoy as a hobby? The only requirement is that it is low budget. For example, the PC build was for about $50 total using scavenged and used older parts. I don't want to spend a lot on tools or materials. Part of the enjoyment is trying to find good deals as well as learning through the tinkering process. Does not have to be electronics related.
Like Geeks Who Drink, but portable and digital. Beer optional.
I love to do "Geeks Who Drink" when I can, but I can't swing it most weeks. Help me find a trivia game app for my Android phone that satisfies my trivia craving. (More requirements inside) [more inside]
Paul vanilla tea supplier
Does anyone know where the bakery chain Paul sources their teas (specifically the vanilla one)? [more inside]
Turn off non-Street View photos in Google Maps?
Sometimes when I drag the little man onto the map, I get taken to some user-uploaded photo of the inside of a store or a photo somebody took of a park or something. Is there any way to turn this off and only see Street View?
Freewheeling Axle
I've come into possession of a trailer made from half a pickup, wondering what sort of maintenance I need to keep it in working shape. [more inside]
Help finding specific blog post with podcast/audio book recommendations
Sometime in the last few months, I read a blog post by a woman who's either a
professional economist or blogs about economics that recommended several podcasts and audiobooks. I now can't remember the name of the writer or the website. I'm pretty sure I first saw the site after Tyler Cowen linked to it on Twitter. The blog post in question specifically mentioned the audio books for Philip Pullman's His Dark Materials series as outstanding.
Does this ring any bells for anyone?
Wacom Intuos + Manga/ClipStudio
I recently got a wee Wacom Intuos tablet and (Formerly Manga) ClipStudio Paint Pro with the intention of developing my (Quite poor) drawing/cartooning abilities. If you have recommendations for tutorials/resources, neat tips, links to interesting resources (Palettes, etc.), I'd love to hear them! I'm particularly interested in comic-related applications; currently I'm farting around with colouring old black & white comic art (Hence palette recs), but anything you suggest would be appreciated!
Need a book to read on a train
I have two five-hour train journeys coming up over the next three days and I'm looking for some fiction to read. The last three books that totally captivated me were The Goblin Emperor by Katherine Addison, The Sparrow by Mary Doria Russell and Pachinko by Min Jin Lee and I'm looking for something similarly enthralling. [more inside]
What is your "Taco Tuesday" for other days?
My family has Taco Tuesday and Mac-&-Cheese Monday. Do you have any other Alliterative food days?
Move to Raleigh/Charlotte NC
Attempting to move to new city to be closer to family. Was looking into Raleigh/Durham or Charlotte. I am a UX designer with 4 years experience and have had a few out of state phone interviews but no bites so far, which I believe are due to being out of state. [more inside]
How do I get the Teacher's Edition of IMP 3?
I'm a private tutor in Massachusetts, and I've recently started problems from the Interactive Mathematics Program Year 3 Activities book. While I'm familiar with probability, I'm not used to extended word problems like these, and I need to check my and my student's answers! How do I get a copy of the teacher's edition of IMP 3? I don't have a .edu email.
Water level in marsh pond
There's a pond in the tidal marsh near Emeryville that I see most weekdays, and my question is about that pond's pattern of water levels.
Here's an aerial image of it. [more inside]
Is there a site that will track my weird custom fantasy football game?
Our traditional league has sputtered out, but some buddies and I want to make a mini weekly "pop-up" game where we each pick 1 QB, 1 RB, and 1 WR. It's a battle royale, and most points wins that week. You can change players each week, and you can have overlapping players, so a traditional site won't work. Is there a site where I can just put in some players and it will track their scores in real time so that we can see all of the teams and who is winning? [more inside]
Fertility testing: when, where, how do we start?
After nine months of trying unsuccessfully to conceive, I'm beginning to consider our options for fertility testing, but I have no idea how to begin. Complication: rural area that's underserved healthcare wise. [more inside]
Looking for Volunteer Project for Team of Web Developers
My new company includes 8 hours of paid volunteer service per year as a perk. I'm project manager for a small team of developers (mostly web applications and Python scripts) working in Southern California. We're trying to come up with a project we could work on together.
Any ideas? [more inside]
Going to law school in your 40s: Worst idea ever?
I'm kicking around the idea of law school because I think it would open doors to careers that would be more fulfilling than the one I have now. But: I'm already 40. Is this a Very Bad Idea? What about Master of Laws/Master of Science in Law vs. a full JD? [more inside]
Which is worse: too much Drano or snaking the pipes?
I've rented the upstairs apartment in an old (100 years?) 2-family house for 8 years. The landlord is terrible--non-responsive and unwilling to update or repair various typical issues. When he does respond to my very infrequent complaints he uses awful contractors who usually seem not to know what they're doing or use cost-cutting methods that often make the problem worse. I'm sure it's because they were the cheapest contractors he could find. [more inside]
How do I start distancing from a toxic clingy mother?
I'm 26 years old Asian female, and mom is 52 years old. I'm her only child and I lived with her and my dad in their house until about a year ago. I now live 2 hours away with a fiance, and we would visit a couple times a month. Mom and I used to be very close and we had very little boundary. She doesn't have good relationship with my dad or any relatives, so she sees me as a source of entertainment, demanding mother-daughter trips to the mall every weekend. [more inside]
Best Books Written for Intelligent People on HEART HEALTH and DISEASE
So, a cardiologist says he thinks I had a heart attack. Humoring him. I am looking for the best books written for both medical professionals and laypersons on heart healing, disease and everything in between. [more inside]
I haven’t filed my taxes for an obscenely long time
I haven’t filed my taxes for an obscenely long time, like a decade. Fear, procrastination, periods of unemployment, laziness, etc., etc. I stopped filing when I was a realtor as filing taxes became much more complicated and I needed to track expenses. It piled on from there – I can’t file this year because I need last year’s info and I can’t do last year’s cause I didn’t file the year before that and so on. About five years ago I was garnished a huge sum against my savings account which I probably didn’t really owe had I filed and claimed deductions. [more inside]
Is this actually consistent with Prostatitis? What should I do next?
Hi all, I've been having some medical issues for a few years now and seen a number of doctors - but not sure where to go from here. Gross details below! [more inside]
September 11
Need baked egg recipes for toddler with an egg allergy
Our 14 month old girl has been diagnosed with a mild egg allergy, and the allergist recommended that we regularly feed her foods in which the eggs have been baked, such as muffins, in order to help her grow out of the allergy as she gets older. [more inside]
Public high school teachers: Please share your thoughts on Montessori
In your experience, how well do children transition into public high schools when their prior education has been in a Montessori setting through the 8th grade?
I'm also interested in hearing from those who have personally had that experience.
My ER bill was sent to collections, but I have already paid it
How do I deal with a bill from a collection agency for money I have already paid to the hospital? [more inside]
Why are bonds better than savings accounts? Which bond ETFs are safe?
As someone trying to maintain a small diversified portfolio, financial theory suggests that it is prudent to hold a mixture of asset types, with bonds especially often proposed as an alternative to more volatile equities. Is it worth the risk of diversifying into bonds and, if so, what's a good investment vehicle? [more inside]
Seeking (very) unconventional sandwich suggestions
Ham, turkey, roast beef, tuna salad, chicken salad, egg salad. After years of the same six sandwiches for lunch, both at home and at work, I'm dying for sexier variations of each, as well as completely different sandwiches altogether. I'm thinking unconventional ingredients and unconventional pairings, things you wouldn't think go together but totally do, grilled and hot versions, etc. Thanks
How/where should I donate massage equipment?
I have leftover equipment from when I was a massage therapist. Anybody have ideas of how to donate specialized equipment such as this? I'm looking for options OTHER than Goodwill, freecycle and craigslist. [more inside]
Road trip tips
BF and I will be taking a 10 hour (~12-13 with food and bathroom breaks) road trip from Kalamazoo to Memphis next month. Give me your tips for a fun, relaxing, enjoyable road trip experience! [more inside]
What nationality is Mr. Tudball?
If you watched the Carol Burnett Show in its heyday and recall the sketches involving Mr. Tudball and Mrs. Wiggins, what nationality did you understand Mr. Tudball to be? [more inside]
What kind of doctor do I need? (adhd + pregnancy)
I'm on a low dose of Adderall. I also plan to start trying to become pregnant in the new year. I'd like to discuss this data with a doctor who's familiar with the latest findings/research and formulate a treatment plan, whether that includes staying on Adderall, switching to another medication, or going off medication. What kind of doctor do I need, an [specialized?] ob-gyn or a [specialized?] psychiatrist? Is there a name for the subspeciality of either field that I should be looking for? [more inside]
Need power, but first need help
I recently moved into a more rural area and would like to have a generator backup power supply. The house is wired for a generator and there is a twist lock receptacle in the garage. [more inside]
Carpet Moths
How to get rid of carpet moths? [more inside]
Daycare vs nanny. Pointers on how to choose either
I need to find a daycare or nanny in and I could use some help in what my criteria should be. I'm brand new to this and completely lost. [more inside]
Funny personals from Jerusalem Post
Years ago I saw a set of personal ads that purported to be actual personals from the Jerusalem Post. The only one I remember was something like "Observant female, fasts on Yom Kippur, Fast of Gedalia, Tish B'Av, Tenth of Tevet, Fast of Esther, etc, seeks observant male for life in the fast lane." First, does anyone have a copy of these they could send me, or a link to them? Second, can anyone verify that they were actual personals that appeared in the paper? Even if not, they're still funny, but even funnier if true.
Hurricane Anti-Anxiety Tips
My city, which is nowhere near the coastline, is likely to get slammed by Hurricane Florence. I live alone and am terrified. Help? [more inside]
What's the best (paid) stock site out there in 2018?
I work on a team where we're going to need a number of semi-generic images, sourced by various people for various things at various times. What's the best stock image site out there right now? Money is not no object, but we're willing to pay for quality and variety. We're in Canada, if it matters.
What's it like flying Christmas morning?
For Reasons I may need to fly Christmas morning - Sydney to LA, and a short domestic connecting flight. Due to time zones we'd leave at 11am and arrive at our final destination at 11:15. What are airports like Christmas morning?
Sarasota with babies
What is worth doing in Sarasota this time of year if you've got a toddler and a dog with you? (The dog can be left at accommodations if needed.)
YANMD - Does Babesia (a protozoan parasite) die if exposed to air?
Yesterday, I accidentally cut myself with a razor in the bathroom of a person who had babesiosis (Babesia microti) from a tick bite several months ago and was treated with the appropriate antibiotics. They finished their course of antibiotics about a month ago. I'm slightly worried because I donate blood, and babesiosis can spread through blood donation; however, we still don't screen blood for it. Ironically, I just had a blood test about a month ago for babesiosis after having been bitten by a tick in New England (thankfully it was negative). Should I be worried, or is it safe to say that any parasites on the razor died long ago?
How to be COBRA commanders?
My wife is leaving her job at the end of this month and her health insurance (which currently covers both of us) is ending September 26. I have signed us both up for my job’s health insurance plan and that takes effect October 1. Is it worth it to sign up for COBRA for a whole month when we only really need it for a few days? [more inside]
Please help me find a meditation practice that works for me
I've figured out a few "yes"es and "no"s, and I'm hoping MeFi can help me put the clues together to choose the right meditation practice [more inside]
Please help me find the real Barcelona
I’m in Barcelona for the next 4-6 days, and so far I kinda hate it. Please help me find the real city hiding within the toxic tourist mess. [more inside]
Job and temp landscape in Portland Oregon and surrounding cities?
Please introduce me to the job and temp landscape in Portland, Oregon and surrounding cities in 2018/2019. [more inside]
Good Place podcast/rewatch timing
I want to rewatch The Good Place before the new season. I also want to listen to the podcast before the new season. Do I want to watch the episode before the associated podcast or after? I do not want to watch each episode twice more.
mermaidcafe is creating creative survival
I’ve wanted to do a Patreon for my writing and art, and I think I’ve narrowed my focus to a theme that really excites me. I’d love to get feedback and ideas for fine-tuning it/figuring out reward structure. [more inside]
What's your favorite musical battle in a movie?
There are two musical battle movie scenes that I love: the guitar duel at the end of Crossroads and the Katayanagi Twins battle in Scott Pilgrim. Can you suggest others? More on what I'm looking for inside. [more inside]
Visiting Sesame Place this weekend--other kid-friendly things to do?
We're driving from Boston to Langhorne, PA this Friday morning to bring our twin 2-year old boys to Sesame Place. The park isn't open on Friday, so we'll have some time to kill in the afternoon. Suggestions? [more inside]
Hope my ass.
What is the number one most efficient way to firm up the area where your ass meets the top of your thigh? Or is this just going to be one of those things I have to learn to accept in middle age, like my mutinous armpits?
Help cooling a large, hot room without replacing current air conditioner
We are buying a house we have been renting for the last 2 years. It's crazy hot during the summer time. What is the cheapest and most functional solution? [more inside]
Help me hack my schedule. Am I overloading myself?
I (28F) can't tell if I should optimize my schedule or soldier on. The devil is in the details, of course. [more inside]
Recommend me boots or shoes for an over-pronator?
I am very hard on footwear. I am a special snowflake. Would you consider recommending me something for my feet? [more inside]
Leaving raw chicken out for 2 hours?
The USDA implies that you can leave uncooked chicken out of the fridge for up to 2 hours before cooking: "That’s why the Meat and Poultry Hotline advises consumers to never leave food out of refrigeration over 2 hours." [PDF] This sounds gross and unsanitary, but maybe my intuition about safety is wrong. Is it really safe? [more inside]
Can you dig it? | Questions about archaeological preliminaries, etc.
Over the summer there was news of sites of archaeological interest being discovered in the UK and Ireland via aerial photography as a result of the unusually dry weather (as mentioned in these posts on the blue: 1, 2, 3). In order for archaeological digs to be conducted at 'new' sites like these, what has to happen, and who is responsible for making it happen? [more inside]
Mr Sandman can do one
I've started having really vivid dreams, after an (adult) life of not having them, and it's kind of upsetting. [more inside]
Wow that was rude.
I need help with being clear about my situation and reacting to sharp, blunt responses in professional settings. [more inside]
September 10
Favorite streaming radio stations?
I listen to a ton of audio, but probably 85% of it consists of podcasts. And I love podcasts! But I keep thinking how I should listen to more music - it's just that I get a little overwhelmed with what to pick, or how to find new music I'd enjoy. And I love podcasts that take me to other places around the world. What radio stations should I explore to broaden my horizons? [more inside]
Bay area - Nashville road trip
A friend of mine is relocating next weekend and looking for a second driver. I think this sounds a little crazy but also could be fun. The plan is SF-Flagstaff Saturday, on to Oklahoma City Sunday, and into Nashville Monday. I can either stay in Nashville for a day and relax, or catch an early flight home so I can work on Tuesday. Recommended worthwhile nearby sights on the route? Is this doable in anyone's experience? What could I do with most of a day free in Nashville?
Replacement for McCormick Classic Pizza Seasoning?
Does anyone remember McCormick Classic Pizza Seasoning (Italian Blend)? This seasoning was the exact combination of added flavors I never knew I always wanted on pizza. It's been discontinued. Can you recommend a replacement? I'm open to buying a pre-mixed blend or blending my own. The listed ingredients are "red and green bell peppers, garlic, and spices (including red pepper, oregano, and basil)." I can get the listed stuff, but that gnomic "spices" stymies me. Help?
Should I leave DC early to avoid Florence?
I'm supposed to leave DC (flying) on Thursday mid-morning. Hurricane Florence is supposed to make landfall in the Carolinas sometime Thursday. Should I try to get a flight out Wednesday afternoon? [more inside]
Roach drama
Asking for a friend who like me, despises the roach: I haaaaaaaaaate roaches. Hate! What should I do if I see one in the common area of a building right before signing a lease? Snowflake: I’ve already lived in the building for a year without incident. [more inside]
Where can I find a *durable* Bluetooth headset?
My phone's headphone jack is broken, as is its microphone, and so I'm in the market for a Bluetooth device that I can use to listen to music and make calls. There's a lot of devices on Amazon that make that promise, but all of the ones under $50 (and a good number of the more expensive ones, too) have a pile of one-star reviews indicating they gave out after a few months. What are the available budget Bluetooth devices that don't have that particular issue?
What's your favorite piece of trivia?
There's good trivia and bad trivia. Bad trivia is mere fact (e.g. the population of Toronto is .....). Good trivia is entertaining, surprising, insightful. What's your favorite bit of good trivia?
forcing everything metal to shine
Can you help me think through my misinformed idea/question re: how the 4th dimension would manifest in 3d/ours, and what implications that has for being alive? [more inside]
Help naming a small business
Can anyone suggest a website that can help me come up with a name for a small business that I'm starting? [more inside]
Las Vegas, NV to Tecate, BC, MX - Challenge Level: Can't Drive
I'm looking for ideas on the quickest and cheapest transits between Las Vegas and Tecate, BC, MX. I've been looking at a few options, but am hoping someone has ideas or specifics I hadn't thought of. [more inside]
How can U.S. citizens travel to Cuba and not get in trouble w/ the U.S.?
A friend and I (U.S. citizens) have booked flights and an Airbnb for a six-day stay in Havana, Cuba, in November. I was confident that I understood the U.S. regulations regarding Cuba visitation, but my friend is getting pushback from her family about our trip. We could certainly use some wisdom from any American who has traveled to Cuba recently to alleviate our doubts since the current administration tightened the Obama-era rules on visitation there. [more inside]
Looking for a specific type of table-top bookshelf
Growing up I had this table-top, sideways L shaped bookshelf. It's easily reproduced with 3 small pieces of wood, but let's be honest, I'd rather have one delivered to my door. Description and not-too-scale drawing inside. [more inside]
Parking/Park and Ride/Transit for Chicago concert
I'm driving from Wisconsin to a concert in Chicago next month. The venue is 1200 W. Randolph St, in the Near West area, while lodging is in Lincolnwood. I don't want to drive all the way to the venue and dea with traffic and parking, but also don't want to spend 90 mins on the MTA to get back to Lincolnwood at 11pm. What's the best Park & Ride option to split the difference?
Impossible to beat coin operated arcade game?
Is there any coin operated video game which is impossible to win on a single credit - even with perfect play - but is possible to beat with multiple credits (aka continuing)?
Metro Vancouver BC neighborhoods for retirees to relocate to
My retired parents are considering moving from Toronto ON to Vancouver BC in the next 2 years. We're going to scout out some neighborhoods this week. Where should we go?? Requirements and preferences inside. [more inside]
How to make a company you don't work for smarten the hell up?
What to do when a product you love and need is made by a company that frustrates you with its incompetence at every turn? Also, can you recommend a quality "barefoot shoe" that isn't made by VivoBarefoot? [more inside]
Name this fondue-bread-bowl recipe
I found this recipe a few years ago in the web and now I can't locate it. It is essentially fondue/cheese dip inside a bread bowl. [more inside]
Recommend a woman tattoo artist in Portland, Oregon?
I'm hoping to get an appointment with Emily Kaul, but that remains to be seen. I'm going to be there in late October. I also really love Alice at Wonderland Tattoo, but her books are closed. Do you have any recommendations for amazing women tattoo artists in Portland, Oregon? Bonus points if they're queer. I know really amazing artists tend to be booked out far, far in advance, but I can check on last-minute cancellations.
Should I renew my Flickr Pro account?
I've been using Flickr since 2005, and have had a Pro membership since 2006. Renewing my Pro membership has always been a no-brainer because, as a grandfathered member, I've been paying the same price ($25) for years. However, this year grandfathered Pro members must pay the standard membership price: $50. Should I renew? [more inside]
What's the current state of Elite: Dangerous? Should I look elsewhere?
I finally have an above-average gaming rig (Dell XPS 8000-series, just arrived last week), and I am in the market for something along the lines of "X-Wing Alliance meets Skyrim": a space sim with an open-world explorationy sandboxy feel. Elite: Dangerous seems gorgeous and seems to be what I want, but… [more inside]
extended cat-care on Chicago's northwest side
My mother - who lives in Chicago, whereas I live & work in Arkansas and can't be there for extended periods - will be having surgery in a couple of months and needs someone to take care of her cats; but she doesn't want a catsitter who stops in only once or twice a day. What options do we have? [more inside]
Experience with CBD for sleep regulation?
I live in a state with legal recreational marijuana. Are CBD-based products likely to help me with sleep issues? [more inside]
How does your workplace handle natural disasters for remote employees?
I'm a remote employee in the path of a hurricane. I'm curious about workplace policies for remote employees during events like hurricanes, tornados, earthquakes, etc. Are you expected to use vacation or sick time? Are there protocols in place?
D-I-V-O-R-C-E
Is it possible to find a record of divorce online? [more inside]
help sibling with mental health issues and conspiracy theory beliefs
My older (and only) sibling is getting sucked into conspiracy theories and they have a particular fixation on theories surrounding rumours of rings of child abuse. At first, this was just frustrating and mildly concerning, but Sibling has now posted on social media about taking action and getting their hands dirty. After speaking with Sibling, I am more concerned about their mental health than Sibling actually doing anything--but that is still a concern. I live in another country. What are my options here? [more inside]
Who is the author of this quote?
Two wolves can meet without being afraid of each other, but two men meeting in a dark forest always will think ‘He is a robber.’ [more inside]
What's up with this movie screen/projector?
This is billed as the fancy screen at my local dinner theater. The picture is a complete mess, and they seem unable to fix it. Is there a name for what's going on and is it more likely the projector or the screen? [more inside]
Fellowships to support public health research project?
I'm designing a public health research project for Central Asia next summer, and am hoping to find resources to guide me / new fellowships, grants, programs, etc to fund my research. Hope me...*** [more inside]
Americans in Melbourne and Sydney in October: Tips and Suggestions?
My wife's company is sending her to Melbourne to close a deal, and she negotiated airfare and lodging for me to tag along. Right now the plan is to arrive in Melbourne 10/17 (from Southern California), spend several days there on business, then tack on a week to 10 days of vacation before departing for home 10/31. What should we definitely see/visit/try? What's the weather going to be like? [more inside]
Should I give up returning to Spain (medical issues)?
I just got some confusing medical results the doctor wants to explore further here in the UK - but I’m due to return to Spain, where I’ve been living a week today. Thoughts? [more inside]
What am I allergic to in NYC right now?
Hi folks, I've been having bad allergies for the past week or so. I live in Brooklyn. What could I be allergic to? [more inside]
How to deal with '(s)he's out of my league!!' feelings
In my single state I am happy and confident, I embrace my flaws and can put aside what other people think. But once I start having feelings for someone (even if they tell me they have feelings for me and at first I am uninterested), I start feeling like an unworthy toad and feel like they deserve to be dating a supermodel, not me. Does everyone feel that way? How do I get over it? [more inside]
A specific program for copy editing
Does this already exist? Could I build it myself with minimal experience and only reasonable amounts of tearing my hair out? (Please say it already exists somewhere.) [more inside]
First steps for drug addiction recovery?
My friend just confided in me that he is a drug addict and suicidal. He says he wants help but doesn't know where to start. I don't either, to be honest. Can anyone help with SPECIFIC recommendations for what he/we can do today, tomorrow, this week? We are both in Chicago. Thanks.
I don't want candy....
I have a large collection of glass candy jars. I am looking for suggestions for non-edible things other than glass stones/pebbles/marbles that I could put in them for display. The jars are all clear, so they generally look better with things inside them, and I no longer want to fill all 20+ of them with candy. Thanks, hivemind!
What does the development from allergies to asthma look like?
I’m allergic to my pets – mildly to cats, quite strongly to guinea pigs and their bedding – and it seems to be getting gradually worse with time. I’d like to know what the progression from allergies to asthma looks like in practice so I have some idea of when to start getting seriously worried and consider drastic measures like giving up my guinea pigs, especially as I’m seeing an increase in respiratory issues that may be related. [more inside]
It's about swishy graphics in journalism
I have a friend/client who is writing something that he wants to publish in an interactive form on the internet, and I am looking for examples of good, innovative, interactive journalism to give him an idea of what is possible. Interactive websites whose purpose is to present information (not journalism but not, like, games) are also fine. [more inside]
Ye banks and braes and streams and narrow roads abound… Scotland!
In about a week, Mrs. Jabo and I are headed to Scotland. We’re spending a few days in Edinburgh and then driving to Oban, on to Portree, and finally Pitlochry before we return back to Edinburgh. About 7 days in all. Any recommendations for a nice spot, pub or hiking trail that we shouldn’t miss along the way? And hows the weather?
Safely disguising eggs + can I eat this custard?
The one thing my prenatal vitamin doesn't have is choline, which is in egg yolks. (1) How can I sneak egg yolks into food or otherwise disguise them from myself? (2) What can you tell me about the food safety of things like custard? [more inside]
September 9
Should I repair my old dog's torn ACL
My dog tore his ACL. He's 15 years old. I need to decide whether it makes since to get surgery to repair his ACL. [more inside]
What questions should I be asking at an adult day program?
I have an appointment tomorrow to tour an adult day program for my father, who has dementia. What questions should I be asking, and what should I be on the look out for? [more inside]
Where in DC to sit and read for a few hours?
The Mister and I are in DC. He wants to go to some museums. I am having hip and back pain and mobility challenges so I’d rather find a cafe with a comfy chair where I can read for a few hours. Where should I go that is within 2 blocks of Metro or bus lines, near to the Smithsonian complex, Dupont Circle, or points between? I found this question that’s 5 years old.
How did you go about buying your business?
[Australia-filter specifically, World-filter broadly] OK, you’ve purchase an existing small to medium sized business. I’m very interested to know about your experience and the approach you took to become the new owner. [more inside]
How to connect a toy with AV cables to a laptop that has HDMI?
Apologies in advance for the lack of tech knowledge here! I got a Fisher Price Smart Cycle secondhand. It is basically a stationary bike for kids, that comes with game cartridges. You are supposed to connect it to a TV, so it has white and yellow audio and video output cables. I prefer to connect it to my laptop, which has HDMI and USB connections, not audio and video In jacks. [more inside]
Question about Disclaimers
Why does public radio always give disclaimers before stories it says has "disturbing" parts, but there is never a disclaimer for commercial or public radio newscasts? [more inside]
How to find commercial space in Seattle area for a nonprofit?
I need to find a space for a nonprofit very soon, but do not know how to begin searching as I've never done this before. Looking for either suggestions of spaces, or how to search more effectively. [more inside]
Rocco's Tacos is out
I need to book two business dinners for about 25 people each in Brooklyn in late October. What's new/good/reasonably priced? Our budget tops out around $90 but a little cheaper would be better. We'll be in the Brooklyn Bridge area and don't want to have to travel people too far, including not going to Manhattan. A short uber ride is fine; I don't know how comfortable this group will be with the subway. Any suggestions?
History book about social life of Roman Republic?
What is the best book -- readable but not-dumbed-down -- about the social life of the Roman Republic? [more inside]
Horses show on PBS?
This summer a documentary on PBS aired that featured horses. I remember that it contained a discussion of how horses learn to stand head to rump, such that their tails flick flies off of each other. What show was this? I am having the darndest time figuring that out.
How can I learn to stand up for myself?
I've been afraid of confrontation. I just don't know how to do it. As a kid I was bullied a lot by classmates, relatives, and even my own siblings and father. Most of the time I just take it and stay quiet. [more inside]
Software developer negotiation for base pay and stock options.
I've been asked to be the managing software engineer on a small project at work.
In exchange for taking on this role, I've asked to renegotiate my compensation package.
I'm having trouble coming up with accurate compensation numbers for equity and other available perks.
Does anyone have advice or resources to estimate what amount I should negotiate for? [more inside]
Yay or nay: breastfeeding during pregnancy?
Asking for a friend: Is it a good idea for a healthy woman to breastfeed one baby while pregnant with the second? Prefer science, but anecdata is ok too. [more inside]
Normal for 15 year old AV equipment to still have chemical smell?
I've very sensitive to odor and just noticed that the area where my TV, and AV equipment (and multiple power outlets) is has that chemical odor I associate with newly opened electronics from China. I can't discern the source of ti and just wondered if anyone had suggestions of what it could possibly be?
How to build close friendships as an adult?
Once you've made a friend - how do you actually become close friends? What does it take to maintain close friendships for the long-term, as an adult? What's the secret sauce? [more inside]
Looking for the logic in anatomy
I'm looking for a specific kind of anatomy resource (book, online course, etc.). There are numerous resources that will tell me the location of muscles, their origin/insertion/action/etc. I want one that emphasizes patterns, comparisons, and the reasons why things are the way they are. [more inside]
Path of Voyager relative to the galaxy?
I'm clearly looking in the wrong places, because I seem to be oddly unable to find any information on the paths of Voyager 1 & 2 as they relate to the rest of the galaxy. [more inside]
Solo Orchestra
Given the miracle of multi track recordings, has anyone singly performed a symphony as an orchestra for an album? Impossible live without pre-recordings. [more inside]
Voting in New York, and why have any party affiliation?
what are the laws in ny re: voting? i know ny has some odd restrictions. can independents participate in all elections? including primaries? why register with ANY of them? or will this disenfranchise me? what advantage is there, if any, to being an independent?
Best price/quality point for LoveSac type thingy
One of my kids and I stayed in an AirBnB home this weekend. They had a LoveSac in the living room, and my kid loved it. If we were to get one, would we need an actual LoveSac, or are some of the less-expensive knockoffs good enough? [more inside]
Books for interesting people retiring into something else
My dad is going to retire soon. He is a funny, smart, engaged with the world through his work, and interesting uber mensch (early 60s). There is zero chance he is going to retire into golf and fishing. Are there any good novels, historical fiction, or memoirs about people who've navigated this transition? [more inside]
Dinner for 45 people in Piraeus, Greece
I'm planning a trip to Athens + environs and on next Thursday we'll be arriving at Piraeus at dinnertime. Were can we go with 42 hungry and maybe noisy students? Nice if there's a view. [more inside]
mitigating future rancidity
I just soaked a pile of cedar in canola oil. I was oiling it! And then realized that it's going to go rancid. How do I fix this?! [more inside]
Help us while away this rainy Sunday
Looking for an online version of gin rummy I can play with my husband. Not an app, which there seem to be plenty of. Has anyone found one they like?
New vacuum or repair old? If new, which? Especially on carpeted stairs?
We have a Shark Rotator Lift-away Pro, purchased refurbished about 5 years ago. Recently it got wet when the basement flooded (not the motor, just the base). We took the base apart to let it dry and when reassembling snapped the little plastic piece that makes it lock upright. It’s annoying. We don’t want to keep using it this way. [more inside]
Best high-capacity iPod substitute in 2018?
I realize that I'm way out of step with modern times, and the masses are largely content with using phones for media players and syncing with cloud services - but I want to remain in full control of my mobile media playing. What is the best high-capacity media (MP3 & FLAC, mostly) player that can be had today? Curmudgeonly details inside. [more inside]
Give up on bit of tooth?
Cusp/half of side of lower molar came off around old filling while eating, but it's Sunday in the UK, dentist shut, is it worth hanging onto the bit of tooth in milk to Monday or should I just bin it? What should I do? [more inside]
Whole House Generator: How does it work
This summer I bought a house that has a natural gas powered whole house generator. Once a week it kicks on for a test run of about 15 minutes. My husband likes motors and has been out there to check the oil and inspect everything and it looks fine. We live in the projected path of Hurricane Florence and it looks likely we're going to need it for real for the first time this week. [more inside]
How to not calculate a matrix twice
ProgrammingFilter. The short version: I've realized I'll be doing twice the calculation work I need to do in an operation, and I could use a hand cutting it down. Details inside. [more inside]
Voicemail service question
Which service has the best options for leaving someone long voicemails that can be downloaded in mp3 or easily playable format? [more inside]
Dog Exercise Pens
My puppy is mostly house-trained so I'd like to get her a dog exercise pen as she still can't be trusted if given free reign when I'm at work. I have questions though [more inside]
Colleague/coauthor convicted of child porn posession – now what?
I work in academia and am nominally the leader of a global open-source effort which has been going on for nearly two decades. We have many collaborators, and have published many academic papers. One of our most productive colleagues was just convicted of posession and redistribution of child porn. What do we do now? [more inside]
Simple, pretty flute songs for kids.
Can you help me find a simple song that’s wedding appropriate, not religious, and that a kid who’s only been playing flute for a year could learn inside three months? [more inside]
Sleep tracker for segmented sleep?
I need to log my fragmented sleep in some kind of sleep diary; would like to use a device to help with this vs manually notating sleep/wake times (& having to clock-watch). My iPhone sucks at this (as do many trackers, apparently) - it only counts the last chunk of sleep (or movement-free time) as sleep. I’d like to pay less than more, but a bit on the more side is ok if that’s going to be necessary. TIA! [more inside]
Because there isn’t Tinder for finding Therapists
Do you have a mental heath therapist that you really like? How did you find them? [more inside]
September 8
Recommend me a soldering iron (or twenty)
I run workshops with young teenagers where they get to solder small kits. They are very slow and it’s usually their first time soldering. We have decent budget irons but they really do take a beating from being left on and mainly unused for hours and hours at a time. [more inside]
Why do I feel guilt for not wanting my abusive brother in my life?
So recently I have been going to a therapist, I've been going there since March. A lot of things from my past have been dug up and my relationship towards my brother was one of the things that became a very stressful and intense topic to speak about. So before I get into that, a little background, I'm going to a therapist because I've been dragging the demons of the past for a while now. [more inside]
West Nile Fallout in East Colorado
One of my loved ones has the diagnosis of West Nile virus neural invasive disease. He thought is was tick-related and had health professionals working with him before he had all of the awfulness. Fever, lack of coordinated muscular movement, vision problems, the works. The diagnosis is based on testing and they can’t really pinpoint exposure. [more inside]
How to forgive when you don’t forget
I understand that forgiveness is good for the soul, my anger only hurts me and not the other person etc. But how do you actually do it? [more inside]
Are There No Trout in Streams Between Nelso and Radium Hot Springs?
Some friends and I are doing a trip in late September from Nakusp to Halcyon to Radium Hot Springs. I can't find any information for where to fly-fish rivers and streams in that route. Lots of lake fishing companies but it looks there are no fly shops or streams/rivers to fish?
Why does Papillion, the movie, stop being shown after two weeks?
Papillon, came out in the US on August 24th, two weeks ago. Two weeks later, I cannot find the movie playing anywhere. It seems really odd to have a movie disappear this quickly and suddenly. Does anyone know what is going on? [more inside]
Gothic horror/spooky/eerie TV shows?
What are some fictional television series about ghosts, demons, etc that are not too network-TV or broad (a la Supernatural) -- but instead capture a certain Lovecraftian spookiness/eeriness? [more inside]
Non-animal gelatin substitute for weird old printing process
I've recently taken up hectography, and would like to replace pork-based gelatin with something more community friendly. Scientists of MeFi, your suggestions please! [more inside]
Training a new colleague is not going well, how to get over the hump?
I am responsible for (most of) the training of a new co-worker and I think she's made very little progress. What steps should I take to help fix this? [more inside]
Afraid of bringing mold into new apartment
We just moved out of a generally moist, humid, dark apartment where our stuff was beginning to be colonized by mold. Please help us keep our new place mold free? [more inside]
Android status bar color
Is there a way to control the color of Android's status bar? [more inside]
Equifax Aftermath
I'm hoping to move in the next few months, and I'm planning on looking into apartment complexes to apply to. However, I'm worried about my credit score hindering an approval. Is my credit score okay, and do I need to do something with an ill-advised Equifax credit freeze before I can apply? [more inside]
What mapping software do I want?
As I learn about historical features in my neighborhood, I would like to trace them (if extant) or draw them (if destroyed) on a digital map. [more inside]
Art supplies for a five year old child?
My niece is in the first grade, and I think she shows remarkable "talent" as an artist. I'd like to get her some "nice" art supplies for her birthday, what should I get her? [more inside]
Selfie Regret
Do selfies convey self-absorption? [more inside]
Do you have recommendations for career change resources?
For the past six months, I've been doing some soul-searching about either looking for a new job in my current career or switching careers entirely, and I've settled on switching. Can you recommend any online resources or books to help me sort out this career change? [more inside]
Please recommend me many requiems: music, books, movies, anything!
What I'm looking for are recommendations for any work of art that evoked in you requiem-like emotions. Sobbing, heaving, moments of celebratory reverence that honour the profundity of death, dying, mourning. Doesn't necessarily need to be "a religious ceremony performed for the dead" just needs to have felt like one for you. [more inside]
Death + Older Children
As a parent, I could use some tips for explaning/dealing with death and your older child. There are so many resources for explaining death to young children, but what about your older teen, who is old enough to really grasp the horror? [more inside]
Psych rec. for 'Differential Diagnosis' - San Francisco / Peninsula
I'm looking for a Psychologist recommendation, preferable located in either San Francisco or the northern Peninsula, who's able to perform the battery of assessments that would lead to a Differential Diagnosis. [more inside]
Have you negotiated for reduced hours at work for medical reasons?
I work full time in a job I like, and I have consistently great performance reviews. I also deal with PTSD and anxiety that I manage very well, but managing them also takes a lot of time and energy. I know that I'd be happier and healthier if I could work fewer hours, and I'm confident I could get my work done if I worked 80% of full time instead. How do I ask for (and get) this? [more inside]
September 7
Buying property when you are not a resident in the country.
I'm currently living in Hong Kong, and I'd like to buy a small apartment in either Rotterdam, Arnhem or Antwerp. This is a combination retirement option and investment. (It makes no sense at all to buy in Hong Kong.) I won't have much time to look, but I can ask local friends to help me by visiting places for me. Does anyone have any experience doing something similar which they can share? Difficulty Level: Dutch/US dual citizenship. [more inside]
Two for the price of... two and a quarter?
Why would it be more expensive to book two travelers on a flight than each one individually? [more inside]
Need help choosing a video editing/3D rendering laptop
Help! I've researched myself into decision paralysis. Given my workflow, should I go for more CPU and RAM with a GTX 1050 at 4GB, or less CPU and RAM with a GTX 1070 at 8GB VRAM? This is mostly After Effects and Cinema 4D. The new version has GPU rendering in the default renderer. [more inside]
What should I do for mom after an IRS phone scam?
Happy Friday, AskMe. I really didn't anticipate having to ask this, but… Mom has just been victimized by one of those IRS phone scams making the rounds. What should we do, beyond the obvious? [more inside]
Vacationing in Cuba next February
Me, my lovely wife and our 10 year old son are thinking of going to Cuba next February. We're not having much luck with the usual trip advisors, booking or airbnb sites. Is there another online resource for hotels (or houses) around Cuba? Also, where specifically should we plan to go to? [more inside]
Everything (in my life) should be as simple as possible, but no simpler.
Today my dentist told me that I needed to start wearing a nightguard and I was immediately annoyed at having another thing in my life to deal with. In an effort to balance the scales I would like to hear your suggestions for things/situations/protocols that you’ve eliminated from your life with no ill effect. [more inside]
secret knowledge to buying a co-op in New York (not Manhattan)?
With some work-related changes (yay!) my partner and I may be able to afford to buy at the low end of the co-op market in New York, having rented for the last 8 years (we're mostly looking at northern Queens). Think listing price $200-$250K, maintenance usually around $300-500/mo. It seems straightforward, but is there some secret info I'm missing that will make this impossible? [more inside]
Dedicated Writing Device Suggestions
Writers: what are you using to write with? I don’t like writing on a standard computer or laptop because the screen strains my eyes and the internet connectivity is so distracting. I need my writing to be saved digitally so old school paper and ink are out, although something almost as basic as that is the goal. Are there any good dedicated writing devices on the market right now? Like a kindle but with a keyboard? E ink and portability are pluses.
Gmail Pony: Context sensitive attachment downloads?
Can I set Gmail to download attachments of certain file types to different folders? [more inside]
How to enjoy myself around Asia?
For about a month starting Monday, I will be travelling to: Hong Kong (China), Bangkok (Thailand), Singapore (Singapore), Kuala Lumpur (Malaysia), and Hanoi (Vietnam). Any recommendations on things to do and where to eat, each time experiencing something new in every country? I am a woman in her early thirties traveling alone. [more inside]
Mac Monitor Troubleshooting
I have (had?) a 2009-vintage 27” Apple LED Cinema Display on my 2009 Mac Pro. It was working yesterday, but as of this morning, its screen is black. The Mac can still recognize it, and the display’s USB ports still function. The Mac’s video card still is pushing a signal to a second monitor via DVI. I’ve unplugged the Cinema Display and seen a flicker of an image for less than half a second, but that’s it. Any ideas? [more inside]
Factual basis to 'More millionaires made during Depression" ?
My boss has charged me with finding out if there's any factual basis to the assertion that more millionaires were made during the Great Depression than at any other time in American history. [more inside]
What are some good books about Maine?
I just moved to Maine and am interested in learning more about this state and its people. History, fiction, non-fiction--whatever you've got!
There was a question like this back in 2009, and I'm wondering if anyone else has more to add.
How can I find out what other companies are linked to a company?
If someone owns or works in more than one company and you know the name of one, how can you find out the name of the other one/s? [more inside]
Global traditions involving drinking from the same cup?
I'm helping with research for a wedding speech which will talk about the tradition of two people drinking from the same cup. In Scotland this is known as the Quaiche ceremony. Some Native American tribes have a similar tradition involving a wedding vase (which has been surprisingly hard to research - pointers to respectful and trustworthy sources of information on this would be very much appreciated). My question: are there any other similar traditions from cultures around the world that could be incorporated into a speech?
Tell me your birthday rituals!
I got great answers to my recent related question, so I'm back with a birthday-related edition: Tell me about your favorite rituals or special things you do/have done to mark your birthday. These can be things you do every year or things associated with specific milestone birthdays. [more inside]
Recommend an ios app for recording phone calls
Can anyone suggest an ios app that can be used for recording phone calls and doesn't require a monthly fee? Most of the recommendations I've seen so far are for Android only or have some kind of monthly cost. I'm looking for a solution where I pay a flat fee for the app and don't have any other ongoing costs. Thanks!
GPS tracking for an elderly relative and a disabled relative
These are two separate relatives who live together and co-caregive. We are slowly changing circumstances so that my husband and I can be there more often, but when we are not, I would like to know (without calling them constantly and worrying when I can't get through). Neither has a smart phone and please believe me when I say neither would adjust well (or at all) to one. [more inside]
How can I help coach someone to communicate better in a technical field?
I work in a technical field. I have a coworker – a direct peer – who is very bad at communicating clearly. Is there anything we can do to coach them to communicate better? (Please don't say "fire them". Assume that's under consideration. I'm asking what can be done as a last-ditch, good-faith effort before firing them.) [more inside]
Dr Yelp will see you now.
My GP referred me to a specialist. (I've been dealing with shifting symptoms and pain.) The specialist has horrible online ratings. Should I trust my GP and go to this guy anyway? [more inside]
Did Edward Longshanks outlaw the burning of peat moss?
I've seen this mentioned in a modern-day environmental document but cannot find a more substantial reference. Any ideas?
baking in an austere environment
I want to bake things, but I live in a different country and have some weird set limitations. [more inside]
PK: Don't ask me to explain it
Heya, I've got a question about a political movement?/group?/cult that's started up in my organising circles.
Firstly, it's difficult to find out out about it due to the vagueness with which it's adherents are operating. The main sign is the changing of their profile pictures to this or something very similar. [more inside]
Um, hey?
I work at a small store and am around my coworkers all day. I say hi to them when I come in, but how often should I acknowledge or talk to them whenever I see them later in the day? Like if I'm going down the escalator and Jane is coming up the up the escalator should/do I have to look at her or talk to her? [more inside]
What kind of finance professional do we need?
There are so many types of finance professionals, what type should we be looking for to help us with our household financial operations and planning? [more inside]
Deciding between two job offers. How?
I currently do freelance work for two companies that very much want me to work for them full time, and have both, in the last week or so, posted job openings for the job they want me to take. Neither is a dream job of mine. Both are marketing positions, but one is for a commercial business, and the other is for a non-profit. Not surprisingly, the commercial business one would pay about $15k more a year. But how much should I value the ability of being proud of who I work for? [more inside]
I could tell you, but then...
A former colleague wants to use me as a reference for a job application. I would love to tell potential employers how awesome she was. However, I recently changed jobs too, and joined a stealthy startup. Is there an accepted way to handle giving a recommendation when you have to be cagey about your current role/title/employer? [more inside]
September 6
How do you keep produce in your fridge without plastic?
We get a farm box. It's lovely. The produce is nearly all unpackaged. How do you store produce in your fridge with a minimum of plastic? [more inside]
Trying to find an Eastern style coat
I've tried this style of coat on before and it was wonderfully comfortable and now that I'm in a climate that requires them, I'd like to find one. The generalized name seems to be a "deel" and it's a Mongolian style coat. What I'm specifically looking for is something akin to what the character on the right is wearing. I've found at least one person who makes something vaguely similar but it's not as thick as the one in the photograph. Where can I find something like this?
Command performance
One of my favorite rockstars "retired" in 2010 and doesn't play publicly anymore, though he is only in his 30s. I was thinking about offering to fly him out to where I live so he can play a show for me and my friends (and maybe anyone with $10?) I would arrange a venue somehow? How much would I pay him? (The guy is folk-punk, and has played for maybe 2k people as a headliner at most.) I have a few grand I could spend to make this happen, and the thought is totally intoxicating. Obviously I have no idea if he'd even be interested, but help me think through this!
Diagnosing Preamp / Receiver channel drop + static
I have a Adcom GTP-400 Preamp / Receiver and a GFA-535 amplifier. I have had issues where a channel (it can happen to either channel) will drop low and have some static. See inside for further explanation, but how can I try to fix this myself? [more inside]
Singer Featherweight 221-1 keeps jamming up on me.
Despite repeated efforts to remove all jam-causing threads after removing the bobbin (during which I in fact pulled out several bits of thread) and from behind the the bobbin holder of a Centennial Singer Featherweight 221-1 machine, (mine is almost identical) once the throat plate is screwed down again, the bobbin mechanism refuses to turn. Why? [more inside]
Help me track down a reddit thread? Adults diagnosed with type1 diabetes
Asking for a miracle: I believe this thread was posted within the last year, but it could have been the last two years. This comment thread was unrelated (or only semi-related) to the content of the actual link posted to reddit. [more inside]
Seeking intriguing articles and videos about epidemiology.
Help me find recent (2017-present), interesting articles or videos about chronic or infectious disease topics to share with undergraduates. [more inside]
Best activities in Washington DC for three-year old?
Our family will have this Friday afternoon and evening to spend in Washington, what should we do to keep our toddler entertained? We are staying a short walk from union station so can take the metro, but also have access to a car.
2-for-one problem: college transcripts and money order
I attended a college that has since closed its doors. About 18 months ago, I requested and received my unofficial transcripts. Last month, I requested an official copy, and my letter of request came back to me via snail mail, marked "Box Closed," and I don't have a receipt for the $45 money order inside the envelope. [more inside]
New dishwasher hookup, copper to aluminum?
I bought a new dishwasher and was about to hook up the electrical (hard wired) and saw the wires on the dishwasher are silver while the wires coming from the wall are copper.
I assume this is an aluminum to copper connection and i can proceed, but i should buy the purple twist connectors to prevent corrosion.
Is this correct?
Access to Mythbusters episodes for a college course
My wife is teaching her dream class: a Freshman honors seminar on the scientific method, skepticism, and . . . Mythbusters! How can she get access to more episodes for educational use? [more inside]
What kind of professional do we want? And how to find one?
Spouse and I need to move our savings from the US to Canada. It's not, like, a ton of money but it's our life savings. Some of it is in taxable investment accounts and some is in tax-advantaged retirement accounts. What kind of professional do we want to help us sort out how to do this legally and without incurring a bunch of penalty taxes? And, how to find one? [more inside]
How can I be less annoyed by a force switch to Windows?
Our org is dropping Mac support and forcing us all to Windows - please help me feel less enraged (and yes I realize it is silly how upset I am by this) [more inside]
Has to be a scam, right? I can't figure out who wins in this scenario.
Friend of mine works at a major retailer, call it Lacy's Department store. Out-of-state customer comes in with a brand new credit card and buys about $8000 in jewelry-rings & watches. Because it's a major purchase AND a new card, it automatically goes to approval through Loss Prevention. Friend gets paid in part by commission, so she's wary. Sure enough, within a week, every single piece is returned. But across six different non-contiguous states. But Lacy's doesn't return cash, gives store gift cards. This HAS to be a scam. But HOW? [more inside]
Second marriage + potential wedding planning = ???
My partner and I want to marry one another. I have been married once before. We also want to have a baby in the next year. When/how/if best to have a wedding? [more inside]
What kind of marketable skills should I be focusing on?
I graduated with a degree in the liberal arts and now work part time at a bank as a customer service representative. I'm in my mid twenties and having a very hard time landing another job. I'm not sure where I should be at all. Which skills should I focus on that will make me more marketable? What resources on the internet will be able to help me? I have some experience with html and Microsoft word but not enough to make me feel that I can put it on the resume. I do not want to work in sales at all.
Renewing about-to-expire California Driver's License
Asking for a friend: My current driver's license expires after the 11th. I renewed my driver's license online a month and a half ago, but it was sent to the wrong address; now it appears I need to go in person to update my address and renew it. What are my options for handling this as easily as possibly? I'm in SF. [more inside]
How durable is faux leather furniture?
We're shopping for a new couch/loveseat or sectional. We're replacing leather couches, which have degraded over the years due to pet scratches, etc. We like the idea of something that's more cruelty free, so we were looking at some "leather-ish" furniture that doesn't look terrible. But how durable are these materials compared to real leather? Is there any particular material that we should be looking for? What about recycled leather? Trying to optimize the cost/durability/cruelty equation and not getting good answers from salespeople.
How do I correct address a person with maybe two last names or maybe not
Sending out formal letters to people I don't know with names like Charles Nutter Butter, no hyphenation. Is it: Mr. Butter? Mr. Nutter Butter? Mr. Charles Nutter Butter? [more inside]
Asking for my cat:
Is there a reason why I should not premix Restoralax with water ahead of use? I usually sprinkle about 1/4 tsp of Restoralax powder on my senior kitty's wet food, twice a day. At first this helped her "go," but it has been less effective lately, and I was advised by a vet tech once that it's ideal to mix it with water. The label (which was written with humans in mind) says to mix it with 17g with 250mL of water for one dose. [more inside]
Title IX question
I'm a department chair at a small liberal arts college. Today, a student informed me that she had heard a rumor that she and a professor in my department were engaged in a sexual relationship. She stated very firmly that there was nothing to the rumor and that the professor had never acted in any way that could be construed as inappropriate but that she was also worried that the rumor might get around and that he might be negatively affected by it. I let him know about the rumor without disclosing the identity of the student. Do I also need to inform the Title IX office? For the record, I am positive that the rumor is completely baseless.
What are my responsibilities as a carpool parent for a teen?
I conditionally agreed to carpool another teenager to school with mine. Conditions seem to be changing. How do I handle this ethically, also practically the conversation with the other parents? [more inside]
Exiting high stress/travel job in the midst of mental health crisis
It’s been a tough couple weeks for our household. Looking for advice on the most professionally and personally safe way for my spouse to leave a high stress job with frequent last-minute travel. We’re lucky enough to have several options, including medical leave, so I’ve provided many details inside, TLDR question at the end. [more inside]
How do I stop being so sensitive about my weight?
I’m mildly obese and have been for years. I occasionally get comments and advice about this, often well-intentioned, sometimes not. I always react to any comment that mentions the size of my body by visibly tearing up. Recently, a random elderly lady acquaintance told me, “you’re so skinny! You need to eat more!” and I cried. What I can I do to adjust my in-the-moment reaction? [more inside]
Future-Proofing Shower Styles! (Or, making a shower for sale in 2025)
My master Bathroom has a 5' by 18' area that has a bathtub square in the middle and no shower. I've never really done a bathroom renovation before, so I have several questions, but the big one is about the style and layout of the doors/curtain. Probably more than you need to know inside! [more inside]
Using a strop with double edge razor
I use a double edge safety razor and bought a strop to keep the blades sharp. However, I have been unsuccessful at developing the proper technique. Every time I use the strop, the blade is duller than when I started. I am using something like this:
Strop Belt
Are you using a DE safety razor and a strop successfully and what are your tips to improve my technique?
How to Avoid (Mentally) Fleeing the Interview
I recently accepted a job as a technical writer. This will include, among other new and intimidating things, the expectation that I verbally interview subject matter experts and/or take detailed notes at their meetings for the purposes of incorporating the information into reports. I am worried that my social anxiety is going to make this... challenging. [more inside]
Make-ahead muesli for the preposterously lazy.
I would like to consume fruity muesli on a semi-regular basis. I would like to put minimal labor into it. Please tell me exactly how to do this in the way that involves the absolute least amount of effort from me but also has a good end product. [more inside]
Mailbox Script and Scripture
Many Mennonite farms in the area display roadside signs like this. I'd like to identify the font on this particular sign and to know more about where such signs come from. [more inside]
Advice for changing to a new email address – myfirstname@mylastname.com
I’ve had the same email address for a very long time (associated with a local ISP who do email forwarding). For a number of reasons, I’d like to start using a new address at a domain I own: myfirstname@mylastname.com. I’m looking for advice and tips on how to transition to a new address. Also advice on using myfirstname@mylastname.com as an email address, when there are other people in the world with the same last name as me. [more inside]
Is Adventure Time appropriate for a 2-year-old?
My spouse has banned our 2-year-old from watching Adventure Time based on this scene. I want to push back – but maybe they're right? [more inside]
Least disruptive way to migrate my wife to her own Apple ID?
My wife and I have been using the same Apple ID for the last 10 years. We would like to bite the bullet and migrate her to her own Apple ID. What is the least disruptive way to do this? Details inside. [more inside]
LSAT test prep: courses you'd recommend in NYC?
Do you know of a LSAT test prep class that you would recommend? I'm in NYC, and willing to invest what I need to. My goal is to get a score of 170 or higher.
(Please do not recommend self-study as opposed to a course - your mileage very much varies from mine. Though I will accept prep materials you may no longer need!)
Thanks, y'all
What are some up-and-coming fandoms?
I need to do some research on fandoms, and I could use some direction. Obviously Star Wars/Trek, Marvel, AT, etc etc have large followings, but I could use examples of fandoms supporting independent creators. [more inside]
What's the purpose of Mary Shelley?
From Frankenstein. Why does the monster often use an archaic word-thou- when he talks to Frankenstein? What's the difference between you and thou here actually? I'd like to know its effect when the archaic word is used in the story.Thank you.
I don't paint my fingernails well. Please help me find someone to do it
Where can I get a good manicure in Boston tomorrow near or in the South Bay train station? No pedicure needed. [more inside]
September 5
Lamp me.
I bought the bottom part of a chandelier which has three hooks (for three chains). I'd like to use rods rather than chains (or rods with chains in them if necessary), but am not sure how to assemble it or what kind of chandelier canopy (the piece that attaches to the ceiling) I should get- can I use one of the vintage ebay ones with one hook or do I need to buy one that has three hooks, etc. If you've done this before, could you explain how I should proceed?
Can you help me email a kindle book?
With Kindle books, is there still a way to access a file that can be transferred and read? [more inside]
Name that Game - Ancient Polygon Edition
I have an 80’s or 90’s 3D computer game stuck in my head that I swear I am not making up. Here is what I can remember: [more inside]
non-sightseeing solo drive from Adelaide to Cairns (return)
I'm thinking of driving solo from Adelaide to Cairns to visit a friend, then driving back. I've flown before; my reason for driving is to see a part of the country I haven't seen before. But my main aim is to get to my destination, not to stop and sightsee. Can you give me advice about how to manage the journey sensibly? How many days to allow? Best places to stay overnight? General tips for travelling through rural Australia? [more inside]
Should I eat this, frozen sausage edition
Frozen pork breakfast sausage... how solid should I expect it to be when frozen? [more inside]
How to deal with a suffocating mother?
My mom is intense, and I have a hard time disentangling myself emotionally. Strategies on how to establish boundaries? Complication: I’m reliant on her financially to pay for school. [more inside]
Good detox facilities in New York City?
For a friend: where do I suggest a friend go who has revealed to me that she is addicted to opioids (painkiller pills)? Would like to find a medical detox, preferably in New York City, that will give her appropriate medications as she detoxes. Would a hospital be her best bet? Which ones have this?
She has what's considered good medical insurance (private; not Medicaid or Medicare). Thank you.
Should I Reapply?
A place I applied to as manager for a job two years ago has since gone through two managers. I thought I was qualified then after having just completed a successful project for the place as a contractor, and with a lifetime of related and specific experience. I have a good reputation for good work and get along well with everyone else when I do come in to do volunteer work. [more inside]
To Gantt or not - landscape management At
I design and manage large and complex landscapes - I also work alone so don't have staff to manage this for me. I have quite a few on the go at any one time across a wide area - it's all becoming unmanageable. [more inside]
Seeking career change advice
My brother is looking for a new career direction and would love some suggestions for directions to look. Snowflakes within. [more inside]
Best d*mn DAM app for Mac OS - to replace Media Pro SE for personal use
PhaseOne just emailed me to inform me that they are ceasing development of Media Pro SE, the Mac OS Digital Asset Management software that I've used to catalogue and find my photos and videos since 2004 when it was iView Media Pro. It's a 32-bit application, which soon won't run on the latest Mac OS. I need a replacement. [more inside]
Moving to Oakland?
My fiance and I have been in SF for about two years and we are not enamored. Would Oakland suit us better? [more inside]
Car negotiation pricing ...help
What is the best way to approach car pricing negotiation? [more inside]
can long term sleep deprivation cause weight *loss*?
I've read a bajillion things on sleep debt, deprivation, sleep apnea, etc, and how it can affect your health. While I realize people can have multiple conditions that may affect their weight and health, I have found zero data anywhere on anyone even suggesting that sleep deprivation can cause unwanted weight loss - only gain. Is this not considered possible? [more inside]
DIY Car Repair for Sorta-Dummies
I'm relatively car-repair competent. I'm capable of doing maintenance like changing oil filters, brakes, and fan belts. What are good resources for increasing my automotive knowledge? [more inside]
My life is on the verge of falling apart and I don’t know what to do.
I’m terrified. My life is about to fall apart. I am about to run out of money and have no source of income and nothing in the horizon. I’m freaked out and seemingly unable to do anything about fixing my life; rather it feels like watching a train wreck in slow motion. I have zero idea where to turn. What do people do these situations? [more inside]
Forgotten Children's PictureBook ID: Man Cuts Blanket, Sews to other End
Looking for a children's picture book from mid-1980s or previous, about a man who tries to make a blanket longer by cutting off one end and sewing it to the other. [more inside]
Plumber got mad; threatens to not leave
Landlord sent a plumber. Details inside. Him and I had a disagreement, and he started shouting, refuse to leave, and threatened to call the police on me. I have a recording. 1) What are my rights here and 2) how do I protect myself? [more inside]
Paris by day and by night
Two friends and I are going to Paris! I'd love some specific recommendations on nightlife activities (for three gay men) as well as daytime activities meeting my interests (urbanism, food, immigration, history among others). [more inside]
Moving company damaged hardwood floors
During our recent move to a new rental the moving company gouged the hardwood floor at the top of our steps. The foreman acknowledged the damage and I immediately called the company and spoke to their customer service and informed them and they said they would work with me to make sure it was repaired. It hasn't being going well... [more inside]
all-out without burnout
When you're in a very busy, high-effort stretch working towards a goal (that you expect will last, say, 6 months), how do you take care of yourself in order to prevent burnout and keep doing your best work? [more inside]
Hope for retrocalcaneal bursitis?
Today I was diagnosed with retrocalcaneal bursitis. I start PT next week, but I am feeling really down about dealing with and treating another chronic ailment. Have any of you had this? Can you offer me advice or hope? (You are not my doctor, etc.)
Vacation-shaming co-worker
How do I deal with a co-worker giving me the cold shoulder when I take a day off? [more inside]
Help arthritic nerd figure out (legal) drugs, please
You are not my doctor. I am living in a place where marijuana is legal to purchase and use. I have longstanding chronic pain issues and recently diagnosed osteoarthritis, so this is exciting, but I'm having trouble finding a delivery mechanism that works for me, and I don't know much about this. Can you help me figure out how to source or make extracts or tinctures, or how to find the right questions to ask at dispensaries? (If you don't have answers for this, but have non-pot suggestions for managing osteoarthritis pain, that would also be great. Arthritis sucks.) [more inside]
What are your great kid friendly restaurant experiences?
Please tell me about that time you went to a restaurant - as a kid or with your own kids - and the place was kid friendly in some great way.
on this night we recline
I need a rentable, not rent to own, recliner, that slides back into a fully flat position. [more inside]
Front yard retaining wall
I am replacing the fence in these pictures with a new picket fence, but the yard is 4 to 8 inches higher than the sidewalk. The fence company does fences but not landscaping, so they want to remove the current fence, put in a new fence, and leave enough room for me to add a retaining wall afterward. Is that the best order to do things, and what kind of retaining wall should I build? [more inside]
Roasting chilies: Paper or plastic?
Am I ok to use plastic bags to steam roasted chilies before peeling? [more inside]
I never reconciled to having to switch to Windows 10--am I just old?
I held out using Windows XP up until I had to buy a new laptop last summer. I realize once you reach a certain age, you get set in your ways, but Windows 10 consistently annoys me and seems inferior in most ways. [more inside]
When Your Adult Kid Won't Get Mental Health Services
Asking for a friend. Her 27 year old son recently had a rough breakup and it brought a lot of anxiety and depression and some mood destabilization to the surface. Two weeks ago, the son went to the ER for worrisome panic, was discharged, and it was recommended he attend a day program. The son has said he'll look into it, but he's done nothing. [more inside]
My boyfriend doesn't want a family right now, I do
My boyfriend and I are five years apart in age. A few years ago, when we first started dating, we agreed on when we would want to start a family, since it was going to be a huge compromise on both our parts due to the age difference, but ultimately it was something we both wanted. Now that time is approaching, and my boyfriend has just said he's still not ready. I will be 32 next month and am incredibly in love, but also incredibly concerned I am with a man who might never come around to wanting a family.
Do I wait it out and hope for the best, or do I say goodbye? [more inside]
September 4
Custom "Mr. Men and Little Miss" Books available in the USA?
Egmont publishing has ads in the Mr. Men books for a custom birthday book, which my kid has their heart set on, but they don't ship to the US. [more inside]
New to longboarding, trying to understand a few spills
I've been tossed off my longboard twice by seemingly small rocks or pebbles, each time on the same super smooth piece of asphalt playground surface and I'm trying to figure out how to assess the risks of my new hobby. [more inside]
Best Cosmetic Treatment for Scarred Skin
My skin is pretty bruised and scarred after 10 years of obsessive picking and hair pulling. Two expensive months of having lovely gel nails reduced my nail biting significantly. What similar sort of investment should I make to address the damage to my skin that would need to be done professionally by a doctor or cosmetician? [more inside]
I want to see more of her, she's fine with how it is now
I have a friend, and I think I need her more than she needs me. And I want more contact with her more often than she does with me. If that's the case, how do I reconcile that, emotionally and logistically? [more inside]
I want to read some stranger things
It's autumn! It is SPOOK-WAVE SEASON. But I don't have new Stranger Things to watch. What if.. I could read some instead? [more inside]
Please help me find an RSVP website or program to use at work.
We hold several events per year for anywhere from 50-2000 attendees. We email out invites, and those who RSVP yes are then emailed ticket/s from our ticketing system. (We also sell paid tickets online to these events, which don’t go through the RSVP process.) We did have a database that we used for RSVPs, but it’s no longer working for us and we are phasing it out, and looking for a new way to manage the RSVP process. It doesn’t have to be a free service. [more inside]
Piggy needs a neck brace.
YANMDFilter: Are my toes broken or not? [more inside]
What accessories and minor upgrades should I get for my Prius?
I just bought a used 2009 Toyota Prius (Package 2), 100K miles. I'm just wondering what are some affordable or cheap things I can do to keep that thing living its best life, improve the driving experience, not have my car look like a tornado hit it, etc. [more inside]
Troubled personality in junior high
I’m looking for resources to help my tween daughter deal with a chaos maker at her school. [more inside]
How to hire yoga teachers in Boston
I have a small naked yoga company and I'm in need of more teachers in Boston. Any sites recommended for advertising yoga jobs, or jobs for people open to nudist activities? [more inside]
Too early to talk about Christmas?
I'd like to make plans for the holidays but my family is a little complicated, yet I'm concerned that the longer we wait, the fewer options we will have. [more inside]
Good science/history/etc. books for capable 10 year old reader?
Kiddo is in 5th grade, reads at 10th grade levels. He adores and romps through the DK Eyewitness kids' books. Any recommendations for similar book series suitable 9th/10th graders that may lead him further onward? Bonus if cheap used copies are easily available. Thank you!
Please recommend me an all-in-one color laser printer?
I'm looking for a printer that IDEALY does the following: Laser color printer, Automatic feeder for scanning/copying, wifi capable, can scan and send documents directly to laptop over wifi, can do double sided printing, and I intend to buy generic cartridge refills off of eBay. I will try to buy used, but a new price between $100 to $500 sounds about right. I think what I want is called "all-in-one, color, laser printer". Which one of my requirements will be the hardest to fulfill? I am flexible on not having everything I want if it will save me a couple hundred dollars.
Sweet surprises for a partner in a temporary LDR
Last year I spent nine months living abroad, apart from my partner. Before I left, I stashed fifty little numbered notes around his apartment, hidden in jars of spices and pockets of his coats and the murky bottom of the vegetable drawer, all of which put together made up a longer letter. Now that I'm about to leave town once more (only for three months this time), I'm wracking my brain for other sweet, small things to do/give/hide/scheme while we're apart. [more inside]
Help me decide where to live in Latin America/Caribbean this winter
Looking for somewhere warm and cheap to work remotely for 3 months, this winter, in Latin America or the Caribbean. Having a hard time narrowing down my options. Please advise! (Criteria below) [more inside]
Where is this excellent old letter about what the Queen does all day?
In the 50s or 60s someone wrote Buckingham Palace asking what the Queen does all day. The Palace sent this excellent reply. I can't find it anywhere. It may have been an American that asked and it may have been a kid. I think the reply appeared on a blog like Letters of Note or similar. Can anyone find this reply? Thank you!
What are some good additions/modifications to a vegan kimchi recipe?
I am going to be making some batches of the Serious Eats kimchi recipe. Any ideas of ways I can mix it up, or different kimchi recipes to try? The only limitation is the recipe has to be vegetarian. Please let me know what to add/change/remove, and any changes to the prep. Thanks!
Cheerful, hilarious, positive podcasts?
Looking for some cheery, high-energy, dare I say frivolous podcasts with consistent formats, good audio quality, and no serious/depressing content. No Trump talk. Something like Who? Weekly, Blank Check, or Get Up On This. [more inside]
Goosebumps for Grown-ups
Anyone have recommendations for scary-but-not-too-scary supernatural or supernatural-adjacent books? [more inside]
Gifts for a new Principle Investigator
My scientist friend is going to open her own lab! Yay!! What kind of small, sweet gifts could I get her? [more inside]
Having a secret courthouse wedding before making marriage public
After knowing each other for three-and-a-half years, my partner and I are considering getting married soon. Normally we would be in no hurry to get married at all, but now we realize that for immigration reasons (to facilitate my being able to live continuously in my partner’s country and apply for naturalization), it would be prudent to advance our wedding date considerably. As my side of the family probably won’t be able to travel overseas to attend a wedding within the next few months, we’re thinking about having a secret courthouse wedding before the end of the year, and then waiting until summer next year to have a wedding ceremony with our families. In the meantime, although we would already be married on paper, everyone who knows us would believe we are only engaged. Is this a reasonable or terrible idea? [more inside]
Looking for an online only English Literature course in Short Story?
I'm looking to take an online only English Literature course in the Short Story. Are there any in Canada or other countries (US, UK) that would be accredited back to a Canadian University transcript?
My SO isn't eating properly while taking care of our baby
I'm concerned that my SO isn't eating properly while taking care of our baby. My attempts to problem solve this are shot down by her. What can we do about this? [more inside]
Condolence gift after a sudden passing
An acquaintance/former colleague lost her husband very suddenly. I want to send something to her door that will be helpful in some way. [more inside]
Cleaning up spilled Damp Rid liquid on tile
Damp Rid is calcium chloride that pulls moisture out of the air and deliquesces into what they describe as a saltwater brine. The cat spilled a container with some of this liquid in the bathroom -- so, a puddle of liquid calcium chloride brine, spilled onto small tiles with grout. How do I get this stuff up completely, so it's not re-wetting itself into an oily, exothermic mess? How worried should I be about getting this stuff on my feet, or the cat licking his paws after getting some on there (he seems fine)? [more inside]
Montreal next week
I'll be in Montreal for a quick work trip next week. Hit me up with cheap-to-middling eats (bagels? poutine? Ramen? Italian?) and maybe a coffee shop for me to relax and people watch? [more inside]
Bright projector with a short throw and other features
I'm looking for a relatively bright projector that has a short throw, which will be used for projecting backgrounds on a wall while filming videos. [more inside]
Successfully overcoming my fear of flying
I’m looking for tips & tricks from people who have successfully overcome (or managed) fear of flying without use of medication. For reference, I’m 39 and have never flown, but need to start doing so soon. My fear is not primarily that the plane will crash, but that flying will trip the triggers for my regular anxiety, leaving me stuck with a panic attack on the flight. More inside... [more inside]
Help me find my forever shampoo/conditioner
I used Nexxus Therappe and Humectress for almost my entire life. They switched formulas years ago and I've been floundering since. Help! [more inside]
Upbeat track required
I need a track like "Feel It Still" but a bit less wispy in the vocal areas, a bit more energy. Any suggestions please? Preferably fairly modern and not explicit in lyrics. Optimistic feeling with a similar beat and tempo.
Problem for physics, engineering, and other calculation hobbyists..
I need to figure out equivalent drop force. There's a standard that says certain kinds of industrial glass must not shatter when a 2" diameter, 1.2 pound steel ball is dropped on it from a height of 20.25 inches.
What I want to know is if I had a 20 pound object, at what (reduced?) height would I need to drop that object to generate the same impact force on the same surface?
Thanks!
What was it? Stock market "game" for real money around 1998-2001?
There was a web-based stock market simulator game online in the late 1990s that sold fake shares for real money. It got shut down pretty hard. I can't rememberer the name or anything else to give me a line on finding information about it. I think it appeared in a law school case book for corporate finance in the early 2000s. Ring any bells?
Help me find the perfect trucker hat
I wear the same two trucker hats every day. One is from an oil refinery my husband worked on and the other one has the Vermont state flag. I like that they shade my face and the mesh in the back is cool on my scalp. My dog just ate the oil refinery one and I am looking to upgrade. I am a woman with an average head. [more inside]
No good time to buy a car?
My eleven year old car is in the shop for the third time in as many months. I think I’ve reached the point with this car where ownership is going to become increasingly expensive and/or annoying, and so I’ve been thinking seriously about buying a new (or new to me) car. However, I’m having trouble deciding if now is the time to go for it. [more inside]
how does your company implement state-specific anti-harassment training?
(I work in HR) I'm researching how to comply with state-specific anti-harassment laws. For example, both California and Maine require our employees in those states to mention THEIR specific clauses of anti-harassment legislation, and state-level resources and recourse. So how does your multi-state org handle it? More questions inside: [more inside]
Looking for short (10 min or so) tv shows for pre-schooler
Hi! We are looking for recommendations for tv shows for our son. He’s around three and a half. We are hoping to find shows that are 10 minutes or so long (to keep his tv-watching minimal). We are also hoping for shows that aren’t too heavy on the “fighting bad guys” element. Optional bonus if it’s a show you as an adult find enjoyable. [more inside]
Delightful subscription or experience gift in SF
Being the bay on the seas of prosperity, technology, and youth culture as it is, San Francisco must be chock-full of gift services and/or entertainment opportunities that are among the most delightful/unique in the world.
What would you (citizens or experts of the bay area) want or recommend? ++ points for links! Extra enthusiasm for social good or net positive humanitarian impact.
Digital scale without memory
I need a digital scale that actually weighs me each time I step on it. [more inside]
Crazy amount of pain from wisdom tooth surgery but NOT dry socket
I had my left two wisdom teeth taken out last Tuesday afternoon. Ever since the local anaesthetic wore off I've been in a lot of pain around the wounds from the lower tooth, which was unerupted, took a lot of digging to get out, and turned out to be attached to a probable dentigerous cyst. A dentist examined my mouth on Friday and confirmed that the socket is fine and there's no infection, so it's just a question of healing. I'm dosing up on painkillers and trying not to freak out. I'd really love some reassurance that I'm fine and the pain will eventually go away. [more inside]
September 3
Writing up a bad/difficult job for linkedin?
The last job I worked was only a six month stint and it was a complete cluster f. I’m having a problem writing a description for LinkedIn and my resume because I completed nothing there. But for reasons inside, I can’t just leave it off my resume. [more inside]
Puerto Rican/Cuban Oregano, how do YOU use it?
I have a bunch of plants of Puerto Rican/Cuban oregano( Plectranthus amboinicus ?). I can google, but I am getting vague results, do you use it and would you tell me in detail how exactly. [more inside]
Stories where we're the aliens
I really like stories that provide an alien perspective on humans -- where humans are Other, and we get an "outside" perspective on human nature. What can you recommend? [more inside]
Looking for a way to make professional looking pdf forms
Can anyone suggest a program that is both a) easy to use and b) allows me to make professional looking pdf forms? I'd prefer something that's free, but that's not absolutely necessary.
Can I scavenge parts from a minifridge?
Can I (safely & responsibly) scavenge the compressor & coolant system from an old minifridge, to install in my own custom-built insulated box? [more inside]
Help me avoid "The Algorithmic Trap" in Austin, TX.
"Algorithms are great at giving you something you like, but terrible at giving you something you love"...we're headed to Austin at the end of the month (9/24 - 9/28) and would really like to avoid the touristy kind of crap that makes every place you go feel just like every other place you go. You think Austin's amazing, right? Well, I'd love to hear about those not-so-glamorous things that made you fall in love with it in the first place...I'm looking for the types of restaurants, activities, etc., that you know are freaking GREAT, but are probably NOT sitting at the top of some list of "The top 10 things that you HAVE to do while you're in Austin".
Arriving at Montreal airport - how long to get out?
I will soon be flying to Montreal (from Europe) arriving around 15:30. How long, roughly, will it take for me to complete the arrivals process? I am hoping to catch a bus from the airport to Quebec City and was wondering which bus I will likely end up catching.
Thanks!
"Hi, I don't hate you and I'm not pretending that you died."
My sister and I don't really have a relationship right now. (This is a case of family ties dying from neglect.) I'm feeling guilty because I didn't contact her at all after the birth of her most recent child several weeks ago. How can I communicate in a way that says "I'm sorry about ignoring something so meaningful, that must have hurt" when our relationship feels really weird and I'm not sure how much either of us cares about improving it? [more inside]
Don't hack me bro
After receiving some verification emails, notices from my CC company that my email and a password were "posted on the dark web", it seems like someone - or multiple people - are trying to steal my identity/hack me and it's insanely stressful. What is the step by step process to ensure I am completely buttoned up and protected? [more inside]
any way to not see how many "likes" you have on FB?
I enjoy facebook as a way to stay connected with friends, near and far. I don't like the endless updates for likes. I've figured out how to stop push alerts for likes but would like (ha) it if I could simply not see how many people have liked my posts (and ideally, others). I would like to see comments. Is there any way to do this? Open to using any browser or app.
Electric shaver for caregivers?
Looking for a simple electric shaver for an elderly man and his caregiver. [more inside]
Best island(s) to visit in the Greek Isles/Cyclades in late september
Greece and the Cyclades have been discussed previously on Ask MeFi visit but we have a specific request for suggestions for the best island(s) (possibly two) for a week long adventure from Athens to Crete in late September. [more inside]
What's the best PHYSICAL way to preserve digital files for 50 years?
Something I read once was about writing a letter to yourself and leaving it in an obscure library book for a few decades. I'd like to do that digitally. Like a personal time capsule. Load up 50 gigs worth of my data onto a flash drive and bury it. Only, IS it a flash drive? And how do you protect it? What's the best way to do this?
Name this plant based
My friends run a great blog (and app/instagram/website) which recommends restaurants with great vegetarian/vegan options. Ie it's not just for vegetarian or vegan restaurants but also covers places which serve meat but where the options are good for herbivores. [more inside]
Help Me Tollerate Windows 10
After many years of faithful service, my old Windows 7 laptop is on it's last legs. I've got a new one waiting in the wings, but I find a lot of the 'features' of Windows 10 counter-intuitive/off-putting and have serious concerns about its privacy issues. But I've got to make it work - help me, Metafilter! [more inside]
What's unexpectedly cool to look at under a microscope?
I have a Foldscope which has a single 140x lens. I'm going to an event on Friday where I'll be encouraging other people to look at things with Foldscopes. I've got an inventory of feathers, moss, and pond water. What are other things could I could find laying around in nature/my house and easily mount (no dyes or fancy processes) that might blow the mind of the average non-scientist? [more inside]
How to best adhere/maintain decal on glasses?
I have a pair of high-end glasses but the sticker decal became all gooey and eroded. I bought a second pair online and I want to prevent it from happening again. I'm thinking some sort of seal on them to prevent it from happening. Any idea what would work best? [more inside]
Sugar-free month-long diet
What are some good tips to help myself stay on track? [more inside]
Best not-most-expensive Android phone?
For somebody who barely uses his Google used phone, has never sent a text in his life, maybe would like to, but has so-so eyesight? (In early 70’s). [more inside]
Online source for plus-size underwear: Canada, not Amazon
I need to get plus-size underwear for someone who has mobility issues. Online would be best - but we're in Canada: what are my options other than Amazon? [more inside]
Hobbies which use 130-size 6V brushed DC motors?
I'm looking for powerful 130 size 6V brushed DC hobby motors. The power and pricing of these motors seem to have evolved separately in different hobby communities. I'm looking for as many of those communities as possible. So far I've found robotics, RC cars, and nerf guns. Who am I missing? And - if you happen to know - what are the current top-end 130-size 6V motors in that community?
What's the best cloud backup system for my simple needs?
I need to get some kind of proper cloud backup plan going. What will work best for me? [more inside]
How to maximise the benefits of meditation?
Do you have any tips which boost the benefits of meditation? I've meditated on and off for years, for periods of up to 6 months daily. I read the same articles and quotes about it as anyone, I know the supposed benefits, but I just don't get that much from it. I do also recognise it's wrong to meditate FOR a goal, but it's kind of demotivating to keep doing something only to experience no benefit. When I stop, nothing changes besides getting 10-20 mins of my day back. I'd really appreciate some insight and guidance. [more inside]
Are orgasms a good substitute for kegels?
I find kegels unpleasant but want to have stronger pelvic floor muscles. Do orgasms have the same effect? [more inside]
I have been doxxed. Help
I have been maliciously doxxed.
The person who doxxed me has admitted it was them with glee, in writing and tried to blackmail me over it. Their IP is also recorded in the place where the posting occurred.
I am in the UK and they are in Australia. I have previous police complaints and contact with stalking services about this person.
I would love some advice / help please. Is there anything I can do legally about this? What are the laws in Australia about this? In the UK?
Is there anything I can do to stop this person doing this again and again?
Pretty desperate
I've ruined the carpet and think WW3 might erupt. Help!
Mental health issues wrapped up with hoarding accident inside. [more inside]
Freeware to lock down computer a little
In order to run software on a work computer I have to log in with full rights. I then need to let people use those computers independantly. I would like a software that runs on startup and shuts down the ability to install or permenantly change settings on the computer. [more inside]
September 2
just a little something
An old friend is undergoing chemotherapy. I haven't seen her in a long time, and found out about it on Facebook. This question is about what she might like as a gift. [more inside]
To buy or not to buy?
How do you know how much savings is ok to put into buying a home? [more inside]
How to configure optional TV headphone usage
We have a big TV with a glass base. It's a pain to move. We sometimes want headphones plugged into it. We have to move it to plug or unplug them, and the port is inconveniently placed, too. Is there a box I can HDMI into, HDMI out to the TV, and plug headphones into that box? With adjustable volume?
Do whiskers get thicker after middle age?
I have always wanted to grow a beard. However, it never came in close to thick enough. Outside of the goatee area, some whiskers were almost a quarter inch apart. Boo hoo. Poor 4ster. Yet, I quit shaving for a few days recently (out of laziness), and it honestly seems like the goatee area is noticeably thicker than ever before. [more inside]
How does the European Parliament work?
I would like to know how the European Parliament (and related institutions, like the European Commission) work, on a day-to-day level, not just high-level descriptions of official bodies and their functions. Does anyone report on this? [more inside]
Is there a name for this landscaping style?
My wife and I are buying a house. Is there a term for the type of landscaping that is somewhat natural and encourages small animals, such as birds, bees, lizards and squirrels? Also, do you know of any good resources to learn more about it? I live in the desert Southwest in Albuquerque, New Mexico, USA.
Essays/short stories on what makes place a community and/or a home
I'm looking for essays or short stories on what makes a place a community and/or a home. It will be assigned high school juniors and seniors in NYC for a seminar on displacement and gentrification.
Ideally fiction, and preferably by a black author or another author of color. Does not necessarily have to be set in a city.
Tx!
Bone/soapstone for carving?
Where in New Zealand do I find bone (or antler?) and soapstone for carving? [more inside]
What is a good way to learn the fundamentals of math?
I want real problem solving skills development for my niece. [more inside]
My houseplants are too fecund.
Nothing I grow will ever die. My houseplants all just make infinite babies. I don't like to kill starts, so I'm looking for a way to encourage my plants to just not reproduce in the first place. Without actually killing them. [more inside]
Halloween costumes with LEDs?
I've recently gotten into sewing, and I really want to sew a Halloween costume this year with LED lights! But the only think I've thought of so far is a jellyfish. I'll do that if I can't think of anything else... but I thought I'd ask for some suggestions. I would prefer to be an object, animal, place or concept over a person. Any ideas?
Foreign signs that mean something different if read as English
I'm looking examples of signs in a foreign language that, if read as English, mean something completely different. An example: in the Netherlands, there are road signs that say "glad wildrooster," which to an English reader seems to mean you should be on the lookout for happy feral chickens on the roadway. In actual fact, the sign means "slippery cattleguard" in Dutch. Examples for languages other than English, or examples that aren't actually on signs, would also be interesting.
"Tiggers don't _like_ Friskies (TM) Party Mix"
My sweet kitty doesn't like honey, haycorns, or thistles (or ordinary cat treats). He likes Extract of Malt. How can I give him healthy rewards? [more inside]
What are handset options for Assurance Wireless/Lifeline/Obamaphone?
I have an older disabled relative who uses Assurance Wireless for their Lifeline cell phone/Obamaphone service. They have problems using the handset, and I'd like to get them an easier-to-use phone. What are my options? [more inside]
Help Tom Sawyer Out With This Here Fence
I want to whitewash the old wood picket fence in my backyard. How should I prep the food, and what kind of paint should I use? [more inside]
Puppy parents, please help
I'm trying to raise a puppy for the first time, and having a really rough go of it. Please tell me this is normal, or what I can do differently to make it better. [more inside]
Shoes to go from hiking trail to nightclub
I'm looking for women's shoes or boots with a sturdy sole and arch support that are attractive to look at. Think something with the soul (and sole!) of a hiking boots but the good looks of a pair of Fluevogs or Docs. Can be a US or European brand. Details inside. [more inside]
Help me learn to download videos from reddit in iphone/ipad
I’m having no luck finding a way to download videos that I find on the reddit app to my iphones.
Have you any success with this?
How to display a video on repeat on an ipad 2?
I have a trade show coming up, and want to display a looped video on repeat to demonstrate or product. No sound, just video. A friend lent me their old Ipad 2 for that purpose. [more inside]
Finding a specific kind of flashlight?
I started a new job that requires we do bed checks at night and a flashlight is strongly recommended. That said, I've been having a seriously hard time finding one that meets my criteria. I need a pocket sized light with a clip or holster that does not have a strobe or flashing mode. I'd also like to find one that recharges via micro USB and no more than $35. Not having it be super bright would be helpful as well. What should I look at that meets all these criteria?
Should I see a neurologist?
And if so, how do I get them to actually listen to me? [more inside]
How do I dial down the money anxiety?
I have a lot of background anxiety about financial security. [more inside]
How do you accept the things you cannot change, exactly?
Exactly how do you accept past decisions you regret? [more inside]
September 1
Money Handling for Beginners - I can make it, just need to understand it
Left-brained artist/inventor. I have really great ideas. Things that people could use and use them well. I've been like this all of my life - conceiving ideas - but losing momentum. [more inside]
White Mountains Backpacking / Primitive Camping recommendations?
I'm planning a trip to New Hampshire in two weeks for a week of back-country backpacking and primitive camping, probably in the Pemigewasset Wilderness. Please help with trail plans! [more inside]
Am I doing something wrong in therapy? Turning down recommendationss
I'm new to therapy so maybe I'm not sure how things work. My first ever therapist terminated with me because I didn't follow her clinical recommendation, and now I'm turning down recommendations from my current therapist. I believe I'm acting in my best interests, but this also has me wondering if I'm doing something wrong here or if there's another approach I should be taking. [more inside]
Can ducks do math?
Does a mother duck know if one of her babies is missing? If so, how? Can ducks count? Has anyone researched this?
Sketchy Japanese Cultural Appropriation?
Do the red 'characters' in this image from skater-gear maker/artist Sketchy Tank say anything? If so, in what language? [more inside]
Bar on wheels... without pedals?
Im looking for pictures of a “mobile bar” and bar stools built onto a flatbed truck. Has anyone seen a non-bike Bar on wheels with mounted bar stools? Pictures would be a big help! [more inside]
What to knit with 700 yards of silk tape (US 4)?
I’m trying to use up my yarn stash and I have 3 skeins of silk tape (236 yards each, so just over 700 yards in total). It says on the label that 6 sts = 1” on US size 4 needles. I have very basic knitting skills (can knit, purl, reduce, knit in the round but that’s about it). Thanks for any ideas! [more inside]
How to move on after failed life?
I'm finding it difficult to move forward after a disastrous ten years. In ignorance, I lived ten years with untreated bipolar disorder, which stripped me of an opportunity to live out my 20s like the rest of my peers. How should I proceed to make the best of my 30s? [more inside]
Reading the Apple Tea Leaves
I have concluded my next phone will be an iPhone SE unless I hate it when I go look at it in a shop or if you convince me there's a better choice at <$500. I know there are new iPhones being announced in roughly two weeks, but my cursory googling suggests an SE 2 is not going to happen then. For those who follow Apple, should I be waiting two weeks? Through the end of October? Just go buy the phone already? [more inside]
Music my wedding metafilter!
I'm getting married next Saturday; we're having a tiny wedding in our backyard with basically a potluck dinner and a small-ish number of people (about 30.) We're going to be running music on a couple of speakers over the wifi but we're both kind of useless musically. We could really use suggestions of good wedding songs, playlists, whatever. [more inside]
Help me find a philosophical name/school/whatever.
Is there a term for "the practical outcomes matter more than the principles?" Not utilitarianism. [more inside]
Little WIFI router/hotspot to keep me offline
I’m looking for a WIFI extender that is small enough to fit in a box and can be shut off and on so that I can manage my internet use. [more inside]
Preparing for c-section?
I'm scheduled to have a c-section in roughly a month due to placenta previa, and we've been trying to prepare best as we can (now 33 weeks pregnant). I'd love to hear your experiences with pp and/or cesareans, and if you have any recommendations for making the entire deal a bit easier before/after surgery? I'm still a little spooked, as i haven't ever had any type of surgery and this is my first kid etc., but peeps are being super supportive and kind, so there's that. ..aand yess, YANMD [more inside]
Chidi's style on The Good Place
My husband is into Chidi's wardrobe on The Good Place. While there are ample websites on female character wardrobes, we can't find male. Ideas? [more inside]
Solo coastal destination in Turkey or Greece mid-September
I'll be tacking on a solo three or four night trip to a longer vacation in September and am looking for ideas about where to go to from Izmir, Turkey. [more inside]
Bicycling gloves with padding and SPF / Sun Protection?
Realizing my hands get a lot of sun when I bike, I want a pair of gloves to protect them. A thorough perusing of Amazon.com and web searches have not yielded much - vendors generally don't say much about the sun protection capabilities of their gloves, whether random brands on Amazon or cycling brands. How can I insure the gloves I buy have SPF?
Art museum in Miami?
I’m in Miami with my tweens. Which art museum should we see if we only see one or two?
Do I need to GDPR my mobile number?
I'm new to online dating and have been chatting with a few folks using the app's chat function. But I'm pretty free giving out my mobile number to the few I've established connections with, since the apps are kind of annoying (looking at you, Bumble!) [more inside]
Does anyone recognize this plastic toy fort (US Revolutionary War?)...
I'm looking for this, or for something similar, for a gift. Many thanks!
Help me refactor my family's Boston trip in September
We were planning a refreshing family vacation from Houston to Boston in late September to attend an important family wedding. Then our flood insurance bill went up 600% (Thanks, Harvey!) Help us change this trip into the cheapest possible but still have family fun. [more inside]
Carpal tunnel? Pinched nerve? What next?
When I woke up Thursday morning, some fingers on one hand were numb and/or tingly. I think it has gotten better but it’s Saturday and they’re still tingly. Now what? [more inside]
Deteriorating relationship between cats
I had three cats, and the oldest one passed away six months ago. The two younger ones were bonded to the oldest, and when he died, their relationship - which was never chummy - slowly deteriorated to the point that one is outright terrified of the other. I've had the youngest for nearly two years so they're not strangers. Both are strictly indoor neutered males with claws intact. There are no other pets. [more inside]
Portland and beyond!
My wife and I are traveling to Portland in mid September. We are planning on spending 2-3 days in the city and then doing some road tripping for nature adventures. We are definitely going to visit Crater Lake but for the next four days or so after that I need some advice. [more inside]
Can you bring balance to my windows?
I'm building a home! It's my first! It's exciting, except one thing - one of the windows on the front of the house is terribly placed. I don't know the right term for it - off center? asymmetric? I'm looking for other similar examples to prove I'm not the only one with this issue, and to determine if there's anything I can do to draw attention away from the window. [more inside]
Optimal Child Spacing ... From Parent Perspective
You have one child who is turning 1 soon. You are doing well. You want another child. What is the best child spacing to maintain some semblance of adult life and for your own mental well being? [more inside]
Six-figure loan, mountains of angst
A family member contacted me about a month ago to ask me to contribute a six-figure amount to help them qualify for a home loan. This is not their first home, and the family is pretty well-off, but due to loan complications would not be able to do this on their own. There is some history from a past financial deal that wasn't resolved in a way that made me feel good. Having said that, what's the best, most mature way to decide on a path forward, both in terms of this request and the family relationship? [more inside]