February 2019 Archives

February 28

My white racist fuck-up story, read at own risk.

I need to be and do better and deal with what is currently happening. [more inside]
posted by wannabecounselor at 11:40 PM PST - 32 comments

Poor management or international criminal conspiracy?

The Spouse works for the US division of an Italian company. He is on his 30-somethingth day of work with no break. This is illegal in the US, yes, we know, but the Italian office manager seems to be trying to brush it off by saying, "Oh, they do this in Italy and Spain all the time." [more inside]
posted by miss patrish at 10:00 PM PST - 19 comments

What's the opposite of a biological clock?

I've always thought I wanted children, but over the last several months I've wanted them less and less. I just turned 30. What's going on? [more inside]
posted by ohsnapdragon at 7:04 PM PST - 22 comments

Transgender healthcare help

HI ! I’m doing an important presentation for health care providers on current transgender medications and treatment approaches. If there’s anything you feel should be included or things i should look at please let me know ! Also what are things you wish your doctor/nurse/pharmacist knew about your healthcare [more inside]
posted by LaunchBox at 6:42 PM PST - 10 comments

Looking for unique/quirky wineries on Mornington Peninsula VIC AUS

I've compiled a list of Mornington Peninsula wineries/cellar doors from a bunch of "Top 10" and "Top 5" lists, but I'm interested in discovering oddball/quirky/up-and-coming wineries that might have escaped wider public attention. List of wineries I've already researched behind the cut. [more inside]
posted by under_petticoat_rule at 5:28 PM PST - 1 comment

Stovetop won't simmer low enough

What can I use to lower the temperature on my gas stovetop? [more inside]
posted by LonnieK at 5:26 PM PST - 17 comments

Zeitgeist Girl!

Are there any superheroes or other characters whose powers could be defined or connected to The Zeitgeist? [more inside]
posted by divabat at 4:57 PM PST - 11 comments

Outsourcing children

If a cis female has a cis male partner, and he wants children and she doesn't, how feasible is it for him to be the primary parent? Also, how much could he outsource if he had unlimited funds? [more inside]
posted by 3491again at 3:53 PM PST - 55 comments

Help me get over this mistake and request more helpful feedback

The way that I get feedback on my work is driving me up the wall and I need help separating out my own issues so I can request it in a more helpful way! I’m a freelancer, and for the past 7 years I’ve worked remotely with the sole employee of a design studio for virtually all of my work. I consider her to be essentially my boss but we obviously don’t have a typical employee/manager formal relationship. [more inside]
posted by the thorn bushes have roses at 3:37 PM PST - 10 comments

Managing Social Media for Small Business

What's the best app for that? Is Hootsuite still the go-to app, or is there a new hotness? [more inside]
posted by ApathyGirl at 2:53 PM PST - 3 comments

Help me find more graphic memoirs

I've just discovered that I love reading graphic memoirs, and I want to read more. What am I missing from my list? [more inside]
posted by bellebethcooper at 2:46 PM PST - 31 comments

How to get copy of my own court ordered name change - Los Angeles

I changed my name and gender several years ago, and I need more certified copies of the court order. I'm not local anymore, and I can't find any information online about how to get them (calling the court clerk leads me into hotline purgatory). [more inside]
posted by lilies.lilies at 2:43 PM PST - 2 comments

I need to see a doctor for anxiety issues - how to convince myself

I'm a really anxious person, both in general and with social anxiety in particular, and have been for as long as I can remember, but it's kind of reached a point where I can't keep going with it any longer. I've tried a bunch of different things but nothing really seems to stick. I'm reconsidering medication, but I'm really reluctant. Details inside. [more inside]
posted by AllShoesNoSocks at 1:49 PM PST - 15 comments

Curate my Instagram feed

Winter is neverending, and I could use some more beauty in my life. Looking for your favourite Instagram accounts featuring beautiful non-consumer-product images. [more inside]
posted by TheLittlestRobot at 1:44 PM PST - 21 comments

How to deal with undermining husband who undermined my parenting?

EXPAT EDITION: After 2 years of trying to make things work (which was a horrendous experience that I will piece out a bit more below the fold) I ended up staying back after christmas with the children and he went back to work. He is depressed and hates it and wants to quit his job and join us. I'm terrified. It wasn't ALL his fault but he was a big problem. HE KNOWS he was part of the problem, but he doesn't have anything to say about it. What to do? [more inside]
posted by flink at 1:41 PM PST - 24 comments

Yahoo Finance charts won't retain date range

I have been using Yahoo Finance stock charts ever since Google Finance dropped their excellent charting system. Yahoo has worked fine until recently, when they stopped retaining the date range, which I had previously bookmarked as 5 days. [more inside]
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 1:29 PM PST - 0 comments

What kind of bed sheets do I want?

I like really, thick stiff sheets. No drape at all. What kind of sheets am I looking for? [more inside]
posted by stillnocturnal at 12:57 PM PST - 10 comments

Help me make fancy brownies

What can I do with boxes of brownie mix that's a bit more interesting than just making the brownies? [more inside]
posted by msbrauer at 11:40 AM PST - 37 comments

Does Lightroom 5 still work on MacOS 10.14 (Mojave)?

My current mac's OS is Yosemite 10.10.5, and I use Lightroom 5.3 quite a lot (which I think is the last non-subscription version). Will it still work on the latest OS (Mojave 10.14)?
posted by dng at 11:25 AM PST - 4 comments

Please give me the extended Outlook.

I would like to know if there is some way to accomplish a concept in sending e-mail to an Outlook user. Complication: It needs to originate from Linux. More details inside! [more inside]
posted by SquidLips at 11:00 AM PST - 6 comments

Help me be assertive

My roommate’s mom is staying with us for three weeks. I am not okay with this. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 10:54 AM PST - 53 comments

Judge Judy

The TV show, "Judge Judy" has found a pending lawsuit I have filed and contacted me. They want me to litigate it on the show. I can think of at least half a dozen reasons why that's a bad idea. Are there any good ones?
posted by anonymous at 10:44 AM PST - 28 comments

Songs that take place during a nuclear blast

I can come up with "Every Day Is Like Sunday" (Morrissey), "Breathing" (Kate Bush), and "I Melt With You" (Modern English). What other songs take place during a nuclear bombing? [more inside]
posted by fiercecupcake at 10:38 AM PST - 69 comments

Looking for a queer-friendly therapist in Seattle

What it says on the tin. I miss having a therapist and I've got a lot welling up now that I'm finally settling down. Some specifics in what I'm looking for below the cut. [more inside]
posted by kalimac at 10:20 AM PST - 3 comments

Is this a relationship red flag/incompatibility?

The person I'm dating has anxiety and it's affecting my feelings for him. Should I treat this a a red flag? [more inside]
posted by Automocar at 9:48 AM PST - 27 comments

What Car Should I Consider?

Considering replacing my current car, need ideas of vehicles to look at. [more inside]
posted by plinth at 8:06 AM PST - 23 comments

"Music video" wherein band sets up equipment for entire duration

Trying to place a half-remembered music video. In it, the band sets up equipment for the entire duration, and finally strikes a single note: the last note of the song. I remember it as a mid 90s indie band. Does this spark anyone's memory?
posted by adamkempa at 8:03 AM PST - 4 comments

Gimme some female scientists (please)

My local bouldering gym (called "The Lab") has named all their walls after men: Einstein, Hubble, Tesla, Darwin, Newton, Edison. I proposed to give some walls the names of women scientists but I'm out of inspiration beyond Curie. [more inside]
posted by Thisandthat at 7:37 AM PST - 41 comments

Divorce with someone who will try to hurt me

Hi everyone, I'm so sorry to be asking this question. I'm seriously considering divorcing my husband. We have an 8 month old and I'm worried that he will try to keep our baby from me. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 7:34 AM PST - 32 comments

Text-only ap news feed

So apparently the New York Times isn't going to let me read their AP news feed in incognito mode anymore, does anyone know of another text-only source for the AP feed?
posted by Rufous-headed Towhee heehee at 7:28 AM PST - 4 comments

Sketch comedy routine about ordering a head, choking on popcorn

I watched a lot of sketch comedy shows in the 90s and a friend and I were trying to remember a sketch and what show it was on. The premise was that someone had ordered a head in the mail and it arrived in the mail in a box and was alive, but just a head. [more inside]
posted by LKWorking at 7:19 AM PST - 3 comments

Ska covers of songs that are not ska

What is my guiltiest musical pleasure? Ska covers of songs from other genres. These covers are often widely acknowledged to be the cover equivalent of terrible puns - or at least widely acknowledged by my housemates - but they always cheer me up. I would like more of them. [more inside]
posted by Frowner at 6:46 AM PST - 58 comments

Can a car matchmaker help me fix this mistake?

I bought a Prius, not realizing how much the seat and area between the driver's and passenger's seats would annoy me. I also don't know a lot about current cars and am uncomfortable car shopping. Please review my Goldilocks/snowflake criteria below the fold and give me some alternatives to consider trading it in for, once the outside temps make test driving a less miserable thing. [more inside]
posted by dancing leaves at 5:29 AM PST - 9 comments

A Vegetarian Salad Cookbook Doesn't Help This Time, Oddly....

I begin a new job on Monday (yay!) and as part of my transition-into-the-new mindset, I'm doing some batch cooking to prepare myself for packing lunches in the morning. I need ideas for the protein part of my lunches. [more inside]
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:55 AM PST - 29 comments

creating space.

I feel like my life has shrunk since I started working at my current job. How do I get myself energised into engaging in life beyond work again? I feel like I have no external hobbies or interests anymore. [more inside]
posted by unicorn chaser at 3:39 AM PST - 6 comments

Help processing specific feelings after a breakup

I broke up with my girlfriend of nearly a year last night. We're 27. This was my first relationship, this was her severalth. I still love her, and she wanted to make things work still, but I didn't. I don't know if I made the right decision. I have a million questions, but the one I wanted to ask first was helping processing two things. (1) This sensation of "remembering the future that I will not have." For all our issues, we built something together: memories, and plans for the future all the way to the end. And now those plans will never come into fruition. And those memories are all I will have left. (2) She was more sure of me than anyone she has been with in the past, and I caused her a lot of pain when I told her I wanted to end things last night. The pain I have from having our future memories thrown away was at least self-inflicted. For her, someone else, I, took away her future memories. I feel awful about that. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 3:32 AM PST - 9 comments

How to still live a life through a long-term crisis.

How to keep going through a long-term crisis, and not let it destroy every good thing or moment of pleasure in life. I’m not looking for advice in this post on how the cause, but more on how to live my life while it goes on and not let it consume me. How do I not let it kill the joy in the moments when something nice is happening, or even just live in the moments when nothing bad is happening? Techniques, strategies, advice so, so very welcome. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 3:31 AM PST - 6 comments

Having trouble getting over a bad verbal habit after a breakup.

I am having a problem with what I can only describe as a verbal tic caused by a traumatic relationship. This habit is causing me to re-live the trauma of the relationship, and frequently re-play the dynamics of last few months of it. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 3:31 AM PST - 6 comments

February 27

Having trouble finding the right mattress/topper for back pain

I need help figuring out how to get a mattress/mattress topper combination that won't cause back pain. Everything I try seems to be too soft or too firm. [more inside]
posted by Surprised By Bees at 9:40 PM PST - 5 comments

Is there a more common name for the dish "flaming mutton"?

I went to the Royal Indian Curry House in Makati, Metro Manila late last year. They sell a dish called "flaming mutton". I want more, but I'm on the wrong side of the Pacific. Is there a different name for this dish? [more inside]
posted by Mister Fabulous at 9:27 PM PST - 9 comments

You Suck, AdSense

I can't access my AdSense account at all and can't get any response from the company. How can I fix this so that I can get the money they owe me? And what internet advertising company can I then move to instead? [more inside]
posted by orange swan at 6:52 PM PST - 5 comments

What would YOU do with this oddly-shaped space?

We recently bought a condo. There’s an oddly-shaped (deep but low) storage cubby in the corner of the master bedroom. I have no idea what to use it for. I’m looking for ideas and inspiration. [more inside]
posted by gin and biscuits at 6:13 PM PST - 32 comments

Your connection is not private.

What is going on when, in the middle of normal activities on trusted websites, the site stops working, https is crossed out in red, and instead I'm presented with a page that it says the connection is not secure, and I'm giving a warning that "attackers may be trying to steal your information"? [more inside]
posted by nantucket at 3:50 PM PST - 13 comments

Shopping for pear shaped people

I need pants/jeans/bottoms and I’m so lost. Where do you shop? What size might I be? [more inside]
posted by Crystalinne at 3:13 PM PST - 19 comments

I'm tired of having my knee problem and REALLY tired of talking about it

How do I deal with polite/kind/concerned/quite concerned questions about my knee problem when I am getting kind of bummed about it but have no expectation that anybody I'm talking to is going to have anything helpful to say ? [more inside]
posted by Jenny'sCricket at 2:02 PM PST - 27 comments

Hashtags to describe: group of women and non binary transfolk

Need words and hashtags to describe this configuration of people [more inside]
posted by winterportage at 1:17 PM PST - 24 comments

Math/Djent/Screamo with tenor bass vocals, for my throat

In my musical explorations, I've realized a thing. My musical flavor is basically Good Tiger, my guitar is basically the thing Tosin Abasi carries (look a man can dream), but my own throat is Pearl Jam. I will never soprano like Dance Gavin Dance/Good Tiger's leads. At the same time, if I'm having a band...who are my guideposts? I can kinda screamo for a bit, but such does not a djent hit make. Where's a Pearl Jam voice stand in the era of soprano men who can rock? [more inside]
posted by saysthis at 12:30 PM PST - 7 comments

Shopping filter: a head that is a basket

If I wanted to find a character bucket for Easter, where would it be? [more inside]
posted by tilde at 11:46 AM PST - 4 comments

What did I not read in your resume about you, Employee of the Month?

Please share with me the intangible qualities about yourself, people who work for you, or people who manage you, that make you/them successful in the workplace? [more inside]
posted by Everydayville at 11:42 AM PST - 42 comments

Contemporary console & games for completionist-RPG-ers & vehicle-gamers

My wife was a big fan of the Suikoden series, but it appears moribund and she's played out what she has. I find I have an itch for photorealistic vehicle-oriented games. We have a fine PC but we're likely gonna get a post-Wii console. Help us choose the console and games! [more inside]
posted by CheesesOfBrazil at 11:41 AM PST - 18 comments

Tricky tricky dining table search

I will be eternally grateful if you can help me find a traditional-style (preferably with a pedestal base) 42" round or square dining table that will expand with leaves to seat six, for under $600. This is proving to be surprisingly hard as Google will return lots of hits which on closer inspection are actually for 48" tables, which will not work for me, and all the 42" tables are too modern looking.
posted by HotToddy at 11:36 AM PST - 8 comments

Calling all Philosophers and Historians, or the people who love them

Please generalize for me about the academics in these fields. Shed some light for me about the people who choose to study these areas. I’m looking for trends and idiosyncrasies, telling details, character traits, motivations, you name it. [more inside]
posted by swheatie at 10:51 AM PST - 24 comments

Moving car maintenance from dealer to local garage

I bought my 2013 Forester with Subaru’s warranty for certified pre-owned vehicles. During the term of the warranty, I had the dealer maintain the car. The warranty is now expired and I expect to bring the car to a local independent shop for maintenance. Is there anything to keep in mind as I make this change? [more inside]
posted by Admiral Haddock at 9:59 AM PST - 7 comments

Makeover! Homebody to hustler edition

Have you gone from being more on the passive and fatalistic side to being more active and self-determining? How do you think this happened? [more inside]
posted by cotton dress sock at 9:14 AM PST - 9 comments

Which diseases give you lifetime immunity?

My chickenpoxed kid wants to know what else besides chickenpox gives you lifetime immunity after you get it once?
posted by gakiko at 8:35 AM PST - 22 comments

Where did my subfolders go? Windows 7 Edition

I have a folder that contains subfolders, and sub-sub folders. (Think: Projects-->Subprojects-->Subsubprojects) But when I open the subproject folder, my sub-subfolders are no longer there (that I can see). It just shows me a list of all the documents in the folders. That's thousands of documents, many of which have similar names. I need my subfolders to show. Anyone know what to do? [more inside]
posted by juniperesque at 6:52 AM PST - 3 comments

Fun or useful car accessories for long commute

A work colleague is moving to a new job, which will entail a 40-mile round trip commute. I've been charged with assembling stuff for a going-away gift basket for him, and one thing I thought of was stuff that either might make spending that much time in the car enjoyable, or else would be nice accessories for the new Honda Accord he's bought. His wife told me he doesn't enjoy audiobooks or podcasts, and he's set for music with a Spotify subscription. [more inside]
posted by Kat Allison at 5:37 AM PST - 27 comments

What's wrong with my light table?

There's a light table in my classroom that has been acting up lately. What can I do to fix it? [more inside]
posted by transient at 4:39 AM PST - 1 comment

A list of the GTFO web sites?

I'm tired of following a link to a web site that informs me that I've visited the site too many times this month and I've got to pay to read more. Especially when it's early in the month and it's the first time I've been there. (I think Gannett applies it across all of its properties.) If I could, I would simply apply a blacklist of those sites. Has anyone put together a list of the offenders?
posted by megatherium at 4:16 AM PST - 11 comments

Songs where the singer refers to their own name (and are called Steve)

I have long admired the line in Stevie Wonder's 'Please Don't Go' where he sings: "Baby, please don't leave, don't leave Steve." I recently came across a song by Steve Monite, 'Only You', where he refers to himself (Steve) a lot, and it got me thinking: are there any other songs where the singer refers to their own name? (especially Steve) [more inside]
posted by 0bvious at 4:05 AM PST - 68 comments

What do 15 year olds want to read? Non-native english speakers edition.

At the teacher-parent evening last week my son's english teacher brought up this dilemma. She picked a book for the class to read that a little more than half thought was dumb. So she wants to find a book a greater majority will like. I asked if I could offer her some titles and she said 'absolutely' and then got home and realized I, uh, don't quite know which way to jump. I'm seeing her again on Friday but could offer suggestions after that as well. [more inside]
posted by From Bklyn at 3:51 AM PST - 33 comments

Aerial land ID please.

A friend found this strange parcel of land in Oasis, Nevada, on Google Maps. What is/was it?
posted by mykescipark at 12:40 AM PST - 9 comments

February 26

Access to antidepressant drug(s) in South African health-care system

I'm going to start my work as a research fellow in Cape Town, South Africa soon. I have depression and is currently prescribed a medication. How can I ensure access to refills regularly? [more inside]
posted by socketophylakes at 11:07 PM PST - 2 comments

Too many P's, not enough Q's -- Urologist Rec for UTIs

My sister has had chronic bouts with UTIs for decades. Doctors think she's nuts if she requests antibiotics for symptoms she has even when a test comes back negative. She knows her body and definitely knows what's up with her lady business. Cutting to the quick --- Does anyone have recommendations for a female urologist who LISTENS to her patients in the Portland, OR area? [more inside]
posted by pdxhiker at 11:01 PM PST - 12 comments

Albums Like "Dark Side of the Moon" and "Kid A"

Looking for more albums like Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon" and Radiohead "Kid A", for melancholy self-comfort. [more inside]
posted by Ivan Fyodorovich at 11:00 PM PST - 43 comments

Arizona trail runners & hikers - your wisdom and recommendations please!

Plan a couple days for me trail running or hiking based in or near (~1-2hrs drive) Phoenix. Female traveler. Loves cacti, desert landscapes, lizards, and tacos. [more inside]
posted by tamarack at 9:38 PM PST - 5 comments

How do I get meds from Canada that are no longer sold in the US?

I want to use something besides steroid inhaler or monteleukast to control my asthma, because the side effects suck. But the only way to get these are to go out of the country. How do I get my doctor to write a prescription for a medication that isn't available here? Is that even possible? Any pro tips for getting someone to achieve buy-in? [more inside]
posted by executive_dysfuncti0n at 9:07 PM PST - 7 comments

How to repair this vintage sofa

This sofa has straps holding up the cushions. They're starting to sag, and I think they may break soon. It's slightly more complicated than that. [more inside]
posted by Smearcase at 8:50 PM PST - 8 comments

This is a question about carpeting and noise reduction

I have a downstairs neighbor who is sociable and entertains company quite a bit. I have a hardwood floor. This floor conducts sound ridiculously well. In the interest of social peace, I would like to put in a carpet to help reduce the noise. What kind of carpet and underpadding combination would best reduce airborne (i.e. music, conversation) noise? [more inside]
posted by the hot hot side of randy at 8:06 PM PST - 5 comments

Please help me choose the right TV and/or accessories for my needs

I want to replace my TV and my wall mount, and my limitations and the reasons I want to replace them are detailed and will have an effect on what I should buy next. I promise that this is a question about TVs and wall mounts, even though it starts out looking like a question about Apple TV and AirPlay. Stick with me. Details for what I need/want/prefer are in the "more inside." [more inside]
posted by tzikeh at 6:02 PM PST - 8 comments

The dreaded mother-son dance

Please hope us pick a good song for the mother-son dance. [more inside]
posted by Thorzdad at 5:12 PM PST - 31 comments

Looking for books that feature food as part of the plot

I realized that I really enjoy reading about food. Cookbooks and educational texts, yes, but in this case I’m looking for fiction that includes the topic of food, or descriptions of food, as part of the plot. [more inside]
posted by sucre at 4:41 PM PST - 44 comments

(How) can I effectively have a discussion about sexism with a coworker?

I'm a female programmer on an IT team where everyone else is male. There is rampant sexism where I work. I had finally had enough of being ignored, interrupted and steamrolled on a multi-hour call the other today, and let the two coworkers on the call know that I could ask to be taken off the project if my input was not welcome. This evening, one of them (the worst offender) texted me and asked if we could have lunch tomorrow and discuss "how we can work together better". I don't know how or if I can do this, given my current level of anger about this issue. I'm looking for suggestions, and any personal anecdotes from people who have had such conversations. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 4:03 PM PST - 33 comments

(NHS) Dentist in London

Can anyone recommend a dentist in Hackney, preferably Hoxton, Haggerston or nearby? Ideally I'm looking for an NHS dentist. Very much appreciated as my mouth = pain.
posted by einekleine at 3:10 PM PST - 3 comments

Seeking your rowdiest breakfast sandwich concepts

I love cooking breakfast for my partner, and especially making new and experimental breakfasts for her. Breakfast sandwiches are always a hit, and I'm interested to hear your breakfast sandwich concepts that are delicious but maybe kind of avant-garde.
posted by ITheCosmos at 2:04 PM PST - 28 comments

What to do when kids know, but can't understand... ?

Wonderful, impish, astute, linguistically precocious nearly 4 year old has her daddy (me) wound around her little finger; she's the apple of my eye and she knows it. This is obviously fantastic... but I've just had an extremely stressful work situation arise very suddenly, and she's picked up on it almost instantly. I'm finding this harder to deal with than the root situation itself; how to reassure and comfort someone who knows something bad, out there, is going on, but who's only just on the cusp of starting to learn what out there really is... [more inside]
posted by protorp at 1:47 PM PST - 9 comments

L-methylfolate for treatment resistant depression

Has anyone had success with adding L-methylfolate (Deplin) to their antidepressant for treatment-resistant depression? [more inside]
posted by courtarms at 1:46 PM PST - 7 comments

How to repond to microaggressions in the classroom?

I'm a high school teacher (white, cis, woman) and I want to know the best way to handle microaggressions among students in the classroom. I have looked this issue up, and none of the resources or guides that I have seen seem to factor in the reactions of the marginalized person in the scenario. For example, it seems important to call out microaggressions where a POC is obviously uncomfortable, what about situations where the POC plays along or laughs it off? [more inside]
posted by to recite so charmingly at 1:36 PM PST - 15 comments

Dr. Feel-Not-So-Good

I know you are not my doctor!!!! However, my actual doctor is away and I'm not fond of the replacement. Does this constellation of stomach + head symptoms sound familiar? I want to know whether it's something I should get checked out right away, or if it's maybe not such a big deal and it can wait for the preferred doctor next week. [more inside]
posted by Mrs. Rattery at 1:11 PM PST - 11 comments

How much weight can a fridge support?

I took down two ikea “over fridge” cabinets when we got our new fridge and freezer. They were attached to the wall at the time. The fridge and freezer are higher now so the fittings don’t match. Can I just sit those cabinets on top of the units? [more inside]
posted by Iteki at 12:59 PM PST - 11 comments

Looking for bad fortunes and bad advice lines for our radio show on WFMU

Help us come up with some creative and witty bad advice and bad fortunes for a robot to share during our fundraising marathon show on WFMU. [more inside]
posted by brinkzilla at 12:44 PM PST - 23 comments

Journalists/Blogs/Reporters writing about the U.S. cable industry?

I have a story to tell about a major cable company and my organization's 3-year quest for that company to bring business broadband internet to our office building. Once it's resolved (hopefully soon!) I'd like to bring my story to someone who can write it up as part of their ongoing reporting on the many issues with the U.S. cable industry. Do you know of any journalists/bloggers/consumer reporters writing about this industry from a consumer/small business perspective? [more inside]
posted by gemmy at 12:41 PM PST - 3 comments

Help me make a bucket list for Portland, OR plus the PNW

I recently relocated to Portland, OR for 'reasons'. In actuality, I miss another city that I previously lived in. My strategy is to make a bucket list of ways to find things that I joined in my previous city in this city OR discover new things here ... [more inside]
posted by wonder twin powers activate form of a sock puppet at 12:41 PM PST - 18 comments

Are these bed bug bites and what should I do?

Are these bed bug bites and what should I do? [more inside]
posted by sunflower16 at 12:38 PM PST - 8 comments

Where to get a length of ABS pipe?

I need 1 foot of 4" Schedule 40 ABS DWV pipe (solid, not foam core). I can find 20 feet of it, but not 1. Where should I look? [more inside]
posted by mr_bovis at 12:31 PM PST - 6 comments

I don't want to Netflix and dissociate any more, how do I get better?

I am in my mid-twenties and have been out of work for almost two years, in tech, in a big US city. I quit my last job for mental health reasons and am trying to restart my career. Have you done anything like this, or helped anyone else pull it off? How do I do it? More specific questions below. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 12:04 PM PST - 5 comments

Understanding Chicago Parking Fine Debt Options?

I'm trying to help someone with their parking fine debts, so they can get a driver's license. Any advice would be appreciated. One avenue of exploration is DebtStoppers. [more inside]
posted by xammerboy at 11:43 AM PST - 7 comments

Divorce / More Therapy / Expecting to much?

Trying to figure out if my expectations are too high, if we should head back to therapy, or if it's just time for divorce? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 8:34 AM PST - 25 comments

setting up an LLC in NYC, advice and recommendations

I am in process of opening a small store in Brooklyn and am looking for some trusted advice on how to get the "business" part of it properly done. I would like advice on whether to use an online service such as Legalzoom, or if anyone can recommend a good person to work with who can help set everything up. I am in North Brooklyn (Greenpoint/Williamsburg/Bushwick area). [more inside]
posted by catrae at 8:27 AM PST - 7 comments

What do contemporary scholars think of Joseph Campbell?

I ended up watching a documentary on Joseph Campbell, and while I thought it was pretty dopey, he seemed potentially interesting. I started reading Pathways to Bliss (the most easily available book of his at my library), and I feel kind of . . . dissatisfied. It seems very meandering and I didn't feel sure I could trust what he was saying. I know it's a series of lectures rather than a book, but the lectures themselves seem meandering as well. I'd love to hear from people who are more in touch with current scholarship on myth. [more inside]
posted by FencingGal at 8:13 AM PST - 16 comments

How long does tidying up take?

I'm moving, and want to use this opportunity to weed through my things. I haven't donated or thrown out anything for about eight years. I live in a 750 square foot apartment and while I'm not a hoarder, I'm a crouton petter, so I have many things. How long will this take? [more inside]
posted by sockermom at 7:44 AM PST - 22 comments

Help me remember the name of this donation scheme

Years ago (5+) I remember reading about a group of friends that pledged a monthly amount of money. And then each month they gave that money to a person (artist, musician, activist, whatever) for them to do as they pleased. [more inside]
posted by edmz at 7:35 AM PST - 9 comments

How to clean a unicorn

Exactly what it says on the tin. I have a very well-loved stuffed unicorn very much the worse for wear from years as a pillow. She gets a scrub with Woolite on and off, but I'd like to restore her to her former glory, or a reasonable facsimile thereof. What do I do? If it matters, we have a washing machine but not a dryer.
posted by huimangm at 5:29 AM PST - 18 comments

I need a (trenchcoat) belt.

I have a trenchcoat that, due to a long line of increasingly stupid situations, I no longer have the belt for. Searching for replacements has been ridiculous, as I can find many of them for "women's trench coat belt replacement", but nearly nothing for men (much less a big man), My wife tells me going out in it without the belt looks "ridiculous", so I can't wear this coat and it hangs in the closet. I get things like "use a scarf for a sassy offset" but, uh, that's not me. What can I do with this?
posted by mephron at 3:02 AM PST - 12 comments

In Search of Space Hippies

I'm looking for (preferably) science fiction TV shows or movies that include hippies. Especially looking for "protagonists go back in time to Woodstock" or similar, but will happily also accept "dressed up as hippies for costume party" or just "hitched a ride with some hippies." I'm already aware of Star Trek, SG1, and Legends of Tomorrow. [more inside]
posted by ErisLordFreedom at 12:22 AM PST - 35 comments

February 25

Home temperature, long visit - what's fair

My elderly father has been unwell. We visited him for a week at his home in a very warm climate. This autumn he's coming to visit us in our cold climate for almost 3 months. What's fair in terms of home temperature and heating bills? [more inside]
posted by hazyjane at 10:48 PM PST - 29 comments

Baby Sign Language

My nephew is here! And my sister has another question. She's interested in infant sign language. She's asked me to look into videos and books and what have you for learning / teaching. [more inside]
posted by MuChao at 9:19 PM PST - 18 comments

Best way to get laundry detergent to dry on plastic cherries?

Arts and crafts project: trying to figure out how to get liquid Tide to dry faster when painted on plastic cherries, or whether there’s some kind of clear coat that would make the whole thing dry (ish) to the touch. [more inside]
posted by faustessa at 8:49 PM PST - 15 comments

How to host my first dinner party?

When I was growing up, my parents never had guests over. Now, my husband and I are hosting our first ever dinner party, and I could really use some help. I've been to 3 or 4 dinner parties as an adult, so I have a rough idea of how to manage things, but any tips would be much appreciated! [more inside]
posted by quiet_musings at 8:48 PM PST - 19 comments

Dealing with crushing guilt

Involving special needs, my son, and a stupid decision during pregnancy. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 8:05 PM PST - 35 comments

Portland Oregon - Where To Stay for a Conference?

So in 2020 I have to attend a huge conference in Portland. I'm planning to get an AirBnB rather than staying in one of the conference hotels. I know nothing about Portland but I need to stay in a place where I can catch the MAX light rail to and from the Oregon Convention Center. What part of town would be good to stay for some evenings and also have the light rail to/from the Convention Center?
posted by ITravelMontana at 7:26 PM PST - 6 comments

Is bringing up skin color when talking about someone racist?

When you are having a conversation with someone and they bring up the color of the person’s skin, when it has no relevance whatsoever to the story (say they were at the mechanics and getting an oil change by a black person), is it racist? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 7:11 PM PST - 30 comments

Double vision (of the imagination)?

I was walking around, listening to fun beat, and I realized just how strange it was that I could both see the street in front of me and "see" an imagined dance routine at the same time. Yet everyone does this all the time in various ways (e.g reliving memories, envisioning a painting while painting it). What is this phenomenon? How does it work? How does it not contradict what we know about vision?
posted by facehugger at 5:41 PM PST - 9 comments

Coping with chronic illness alone

I am dealing with a chronic illness in my 30's with zero form of support system, and I'm really beginning to struggle to keep up. I'm looking for practical advice/hacks for daily life stuff, stories of how you managed, suggestions for resources (for someone with very little money). [more inside]
posted by goreycat at 4:41 PM PST - 12 comments

Plug adapters in Hilo, HI

Where can I buy inexpensive UK to US plug adapters in downtown Hilo, Hawaii? Alternatively, is there somewhere I can get an Amazon delivery that is not the place where I am staying? There are no Amazon lockers in Hilo. [more inside]
posted by tavegyl at 4:06 PM PST - 11 comments

Music Royalties

I'm trying to understand how much terrestrial vs. online stations pay for music licensing companies to play their music. If I understand the Copyright Royalty Board (and I may not), it has a formula that says, over air broadcasts cost non commercial stations not affiliated with a college or university $1 in royalties per play. [more inside]
posted by CollectiveMind at 3:53 PM PST - 2 comments

Wanted: videos of people working to watch whilst procrastinating

I find videos of people working very calming. I just watched the Japanese Moving company video on the front page, and I'd like some more. Anyone got suggestions that might scratch this itch? Or search terms that would be particularly fruitful? [more inside]
posted by kjs4 at 3:24 PM PST - 9 comments

What archive would like my zine collection?

Where could I donate about a half-dozen legal boxes worth of zines, fanzines, self-published comics, underground newspapers and so on? These are primarily from the early 80s through mid-90s, but there are a few items dating back earlier. I know there are institutional archives compiling these, but I don't have any leads on who would be interested and I'm also feeling daunted by the task of shipping the stuff. [more inside]
posted by ardgedee at 3:19 PM PST - 16 comments

Awkward interviews

Please link me to the most awkward and uncomfortable interviews you can think of.
posted by Triumphant Muzak at 3:19 PM PST - 32 comments

Cultural appropriation for kids

Can you help me explain to my five year old why we shouldn‘t dress up as Native Americans for Carneval, and also not dance around and ululate? [more inside]
posted by Omnomnom at 2:20 PM PST - 29 comments

drugstore makeup

I need to change up my makeup routine as what I use now is wreaking havoc on my skin. Looking for some suggestions for drugstore brands to do this. [more inside]
posted by thereemix at 1:59 PM PST - 10 comments

A Filtered Twitter?

Is there a way I can view my twitter feed WITHOUT any RT's or Likes from the people I follow? So I would only see tweets they wrote? That's all I want to see. I'm open to apps if necessary, but hopefully free.
posted by dripdripdrop at 1:53 PM PST - 10 comments

My MacBook Has It’s Mind!

When I boot my MacBook, it shows me the login screen, let’s me enter my password, accepts my password, and then starts flashing all over the place. Help! [more inside]
posted by JPowers at 1:50 PM PST - 11 comments

How to cancel a free "legacy" AOL account and all associated usernames?

Suggestions produced by web searches no longer work (most are outdated by many years). Account management tools available when logged in no longer present a delete option. [more inside]
posted by cool breeze at 1:31 PM PST - 3 comments

Memory Palace

How do I archive for offline view a complicated website with 3D tour? [more inside]
posted by jadepearl at 1:17 PM PST - 6 comments

Best books for babies?

I'm looking for recommendations for baby books--what are some of your favorites, suitable for, say, age 0-5? Desiderata: Has some sort of story arc (even if a loose one), has nice illustrations (i.e., not cheap computer rendering sorts of things), not too moralistic/preachy, and shows diverse babies/kids/families/people (although animals/nature/etc are also okay). [more inside]
posted by stillmoving at 12:41 PM PST - 32 comments

Regularly uploading a paper calendar

I keep an online calendar with Google. My wife uses a paper planner. (Together they fight crime!) What's the best way for me to get her appointments online so that I can better schedule things that impact both of us? [more inside]
posted by Nonsteroidal Anti-Inflammatory Drug at 12:26 PM PST - 7 comments

Easy Russian songs for English speakers

My small, informal folk singing group sometimes does songs in non-English languages. As a native Russian speaker, I'd like to teach them a simple Russian song. The question is, does one exist that is simple enough? [more inside]
posted by danceswithlight at 12:22 PM PST - 9 comments

Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria

I think a loved one may have this, but I've only heard of it very recently in association with ADHD. I cannot find books or scholarly articles about it (admittedly finding articles is not a strength of mine). Is it real? [more inside]
posted by kitcat at 12:18 PM PST - 12 comments

ISO forever home for doggo

A friend found a doggo that was sadly chained up outside in the cold weather. The owner didn't want him and I do not know the first thing in re-homing pets. Please help! [more inside]
posted by lunastellasol at 12:09 PM PST - 3 comments

Old joke / humor book ID

I'm looking to ID a joke book I had in the 70s. It contained several jokes and explained why each was funny. There are examples in the extended post. [more inside]
posted by mu at 11:44 AM PST - 5 comments

What’s the best individually bagged butter popcorn?

I’d like to find the yummiest butter popcorn in serving-sized (~2-3 oz) bags — NOT microwave, must be pre-popped. I’d prefer not to get a big bag so that it stays fresh. Currently, the best I’ve found IMO is at Starbucks, but I want to buy in bulk. Lesser Evil Himalayan Gold was decent (didn’t try Oh My Ghee yet; seemed like reviewers in general preferred the other flavor). Tried Rocky Mountain Butter and hated it (too greasy, not salty enough). Thanks in advance for your recommendations! Assume access to all US stores & websites.
posted by karbonokapi at 11:35 AM PST - 4 comments

This goes well with that

Image editor question: I have a bunch of images and want to view different combinations of them. I've been searching high and low, but can't find any app/page/magic that does this for me. Photoshop dummy of the functions here: imgur link. [more inside]
posted by monocultured at 9:24 AM PST - 7 comments

How to simplify a large international transfer of funds from US - EU?

In the next 1-2 years I will have a need to transfer a significant sum of money from a bank in the US to one in the EU. I am now at the point of choosing a bank in the US, and am trying to determine what are the most important things to consider. [more inside]
posted by myotahapea at 9:05 AM PST - 20 comments

The vagueries of vaginas

My almost five year old has been having a tough time with her poor little nethers. We're going through various steps with various doctors but the two questions are 1) are we missing something obvious that might be helpful 2) Before our upcoming meeting with a specialist what should we be ready to talk about/shoot down? [more inside]
posted by jeszac at 9:04 AM PST - 20 comments

European equivalent of linux.conf.au?

I've been enjoying so many of the talks from linux.conf.au 2019. What's the European equivalent? Have I missed it?
posted by jpziller at 8:45 AM PST - 3 comments

Making audio work in presentations

Is there a reliable way to make sure the videos I want to play as part of my presentations will work with sound, when the places I present vary in their presenting equipment and their ability to troubleshoot the equipment? [more inside]
posted by quiet coyote at 8:22 AM PST - 8 comments

YANAL, but how do I get this girl out of my house?

Took in a friend who was in a rough spot about four months ago. She refuses to leave or pay rent. How do I evict her safely and legally? Lots of details inside. [more inside]
posted by coffeeand at 6:47 AM PST - 45 comments

Milk Microfoaming Tips

I've made a daily latte (or four) every day at home for over a decade. I still haven't mastered the technique of microfoaming the milk. My machine is more than capable; alas, I am not. Do you have tips? [more inside]
posted by Admiral Haddock at 6:22 AM PST - 11 comments

Unsure about next steps in my career...

I have an AA degree in Web Admin, currently working as a graphic designer, and feeling a bit hopeless about my future. Please help! [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 6:22 AM PST - 4 comments

Sympathy card for death of a new employee

I just had an employee die on the job this morning. He had an apparent heart attack while shoveling snow on one of our customer’s sites. He was in his early sixties. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 6:22 AM PST - 22 comments

Got fired. Do I mention the ongoing discrimination case at interviews?

I was very recently dismissed, and now I'm looking for a new job. Do I tell prospective employers that the contract was terminated and leave it at that? Or do I add an explanation that there's an ongoing discrimination case surrounding the dismissal? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 6:22 AM PST - 10 comments

a Mad Men watchalong podcast

I'm watching Mad Men, mostly for the second time. I like listening to a podcast after I watch an episode of a thing. What's a good one-episode-per-episode podcast for Mad Men? Either contemporaneous or after-the-fact is fine. More film-crit-y and literary is better.
posted by 4th number at 5:59 AM PST - 1 comment

Real estate value of renovating master bathroom

We are getting our house ready to sell to move to a nearby neighborhood. We have a great real estate agent but he is legally prevented from really telling us whether we would get our money back out if we renovate the master bathroom, which is the only shabby spot in the house. [more inside]
posted by Slothrop at 5:53 AM PST - 11 comments

Water the comparative costs of efficiency?

I'm looking for a handy chart / guide on prioritizing energy efficiency. I'd like it to collapse to a single metric - carbon generated, water used, etc. I'd like to know the relative costs of different materials - how much energy is used to make paper products vs plastic? How much energy is saved by using plastic wrap on vegetables vs. throwing vegetables away? What's the cost of driving 10 miles to the store to pick up one item, vs having Amazon ship it? How does throwing a bottle in the garbage compare to eating a pound of beef?
posted by rebent at 5:25 AM PST - 4 comments

Any pointers of a good, economical place to study English?

I'm looking for a place where my GF, a Chinese national, could study English full time without breaking the bank. Doesn't have to be the best school ever, but ideally staffed by competent enough native English speakers. All the programs I know are in America, Australia and the like and are quite expensive, relatively speaking. [more inside]
posted by wooh at 4:51 AM PST - 9 comments

How do I withdraw my empathy to be hurt less by people?

The world is overwhelming and I just want to hide. [more inside]
posted by adelaide at 2:08 AM PST - 20 comments

War and Peace: The subject of history is the life of peoples and mankind

.... but only if you're part of the aristocracy, royalty, or otherwise very rich, as far as Tolstoy is concerned. Where do I read about the other 99.99% of the Russian population during the Napoleonic Wars? [more inside]
posted by humuhumu at 2:06 AM PST - 8 comments

Garden Plan app

La Segunda wishes to give our garden a complete makeover. Is there a good program that makes it easy to run up a plan of the layout (path, lawns, flowerbeds, barbecue etc)? Windows, iOS, or Android.
posted by Segundus at 12:44 AM PST - 2 comments

Finding a durable and quiet mouse for occasional use?

I have looked into choices like the Logitech M220 and M330, certain gaming mice, and the Nexus SM-9000B, but I wondered what kind of personal experience Mefites have had with any mice that advertise themselves as having a silent clicking noise? [more inside]
posted by redrawturtle at 12:26 AM PST - 1 comment

February 24

Standard agreement that construction access includes fixing damages

A neighbor would like construction access through our driveway (which is itself an easement shared with a different neighbor). Our driveway is narrow enough that previous construction vehicles have caused serious damage to each adjoining house. Is there an legal agreement specific to this, that would make any damages the first neighbors' responsibility to fix promptly?
posted by clew at 11:17 PM PST - 5 comments

Should I go to rehab? What questions do I need to ask?

I'm an alcoholic, without doubt and have known this for the last 7 years. I've tried going it alone with rational recovery books, I've tried AA, and I think the longest I've gone without a drink is 4 weeks. I've had a number of serious health problems (broken ribs, head injury, GI bleed) as a result. I was told at the hospital after an accident involving alcohol that this place, which is local to me would accept my health insurance so my stay would be free (apart from the excess that I can afford). [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 7:38 PM PST - 10 comments

Help me identify these "blind date books."

There was a "blind date with a book" exhibit. I couldn't buy all the books. Help me figure out what they were! [more inside]
posted by jenfullmoon at 7:25 PM PST - 8 comments

Adventure travel suggestions in early April

My girlfriend and I are looking to make some semi-last minute vacation plans for around the beginning of April. We're hoping to get some help from the Hivemind! [more inside]
posted by Osrinith at 7:21 PM PST - 6 comments

How best to send a large money order from an online bank?

I need to transfer a large amount of money from Massachusetts to Pennsylvennia, and my bank (Simple, so I guess an online startup that provides insured banking services) might not let me send a cashier's check. If they don't, what's the smartest, safest way to send that money via money orders or similar products? This is more than $10K, so I expect there's probably some relevant tax and disclosure stuff to worry about to stay compliant. [more inside]
posted by MuppetNavy at 5:46 PM PST - 9 comments

Make my TV time not feel like such a waste

Mostly looking for something educational to put on TV as background noise. Kinda like a coursera lecture but not focused on microdegrees and not having homework. [more inside]
posted by earlsofsandwich at 4:41 PM PST - 20 comments

Unusual AirBnB/coworking spaces in the Greater Boston area

Are there any unusual AirBnBs or coworking spaces—along the lines of Mr Anderson’s House on Prince Edward Island—in the Greater Boston area (within Route 128/North Shore/Metrowest)? [more inside]
posted by pxe2000 at 3:43 PM PST - 4 comments

Female with High-Functioning Austism?

Does anyone have experience with being diagnosed with high-functioning autism or Aspergers as an adult woman? Any advice on how to navigate this as an independent, professional working adult? [more inside]
posted by AnnaBegins942 at 3:22 PM PST - 6 comments

Need business shoe with a good balance of shock absorption and firmness

I have been wearing Rockport World Tour shoes for the past 20 years (I’m a male). Looking for a business shoes with similar mix of firmness and shock absorption in the mid sole. [more inside]
posted by hithere at 3:10 PM PST - 3 comments

Looking a gift wood stove in the, um, firebox?

We bought a house! It has a wood stove! The seller is happy to let us have a matching wood stove that's on the premises "for parts or replacement" (presumably meaning replacement of the installed one). Do we want it? [more inside]
posted by daisyace at 3:03 PM PST - 11 comments

What's that *french* song?

Heard in cafe, couldn't find out... [more inside]
posted by mdrew at 2:53 PM PST - 7 comments

Podcast me

I'm looking for podcast recommendations similar to The Dollop. I enjoy the strong storytelling mixed with comedy. I've tried Last Podcast on the Left and it was a bit hit or miss on the storytelling. My Favorite Murder was interesting, but I would like more in-depth research. Potential topics: history, horror, true crime, willing to give almost anything a shot really. Thanks!
posted by Apoch at 1:48 PM PST - 11 comments

Can’t claim codependence on your taxes

I’ve had a long string of serial long-term codependent relationships with men. My life is getting better slowly with time and I’m realizing how much these patterns are holding me back. I’m focusing a lot on me in therapy right now but I’d like to hear about how healthy non-codependent relationships work and if there are any good books about the topic for bibliotherapy purposes. [more inside]
posted by stoneandstar at 12:52 PM PST - 12 comments

Can a seller or I fire all employees when buying a small business?

Thinking about buying a small retail store with about 6 employees. I want to have all new employees when the business is purchased. Any legal problems for this? [more inside]
posted by curiousleo at 11:44 AM PST - 15 comments

Best way to convince Purolator to defray cost related to non-delivery?

I have incurred high costs and significant inconvenience because Purolator lost track of, and failed to deliver in time, a vital secure document under guaranteed rush delivery--and it took them over 24 hours to admit it had not even left the original depot. They have now admitted it was preventable and completely their fault, and have agreed to complete the delivery and refund the shipping cost. Though their T&C says they're not liable, is there a way to convince them to defray my other costs? [more inside]
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 11:25 AM PST - 9 comments

Apps to keep me motivated for the long haul.

I've been using this app to keep a gratitude journal, and I'm very happy with – this is the first time I've stuck with a gratitude journal for more than a week (57 day streak and counting). I'd like something similar to track "eating healthy", "drinking only in moderation", "working out regularly", stuff like that. Must be simple and encouraging. Suggestions? [more inside]
posted by Tehhund at 11:12 AM PST - 10 comments

How to turn old book pdfs into lovely new physical books?

So, let's imagine that I have some pdf files of scans of old books from e.g. archive.org. I use a few old standard catalogues and I want these to be converted into real, holdable books rather than using the digital files constantly. [more inside]
posted by Hadrian at 10:01 AM PST - 5 comments

Maintaining anonymity on Twitter

How can I strip metadata and any information about me, my location, my device, etc. from photos or images I use on Twitter? [more inside]
posted by A Terrible Llama at 10:00 AM PST - 5 comments

I have friends in distant places! How can I stay more connected?

I have a pretty extensive network of work colleagues. I'd like to be reminded to reach out to them on a more regular basis (and some of them, MUCH more regular). Is there a way I could easiy do this with an app like todoist or gcal or outlook or habitica? [more inside]
posted by arnicae at 9:31 AM PST - 4 comments

Cat urinary issues strike again

Despite being on urinary feed cat has developed urinary issues. Help? [more inside]
posted by St. Peepsburg at 8:55 AM PST - 7 comments

Alternative to Windows Media Player

So, apparently WMP is discontinuing the part of it that looks up album info. I really don't want to have to manually look up and edit every song I rip. So it's time to rip the bandaid off and find a new program to help me manage my music files. A sprinkling of snowflakes below the fold... [more inside]
posted by dancing leaves at 8:17 AM PST - 8 comments

Smart storage for collection of New Yorker magazines

I have New Yorker magazines dating back to 2015 or so. They are heaped in piles on my coffee table. I would like a storage solution that will look amazing and keep them accessible for browsing and reading. [more inside]
posted by roolya_boolya at 8:07 AM PST - 9 comments

Should I "save" someone who has cheated on me?

Have you "saved" a significant other who asked you to do so? How do I know when to do that? Difficulty level: She cheated on me several times. [more inside]
posted by zeek321 at 12:26 AM PST - 47 comments

February 23

How to Meet in the Middle of the Mattress?

I love my bed, but my boyfriend does not. He gave up his much loved bed when we moved in together this past summer and he has not adapted to it over the past 7 months like I hoped. What can we do to make him more comfortable without buying a brand new bed? [more inside]
posted by Bunglegirl at 8:27 PM PST - 9 comments

Name that country music song, wives of legends edition

I heard the end of a song on XM radio a few weeks ago - it was by, and about, wives of famous outlaw country music singers. I thought it was something like Miss Audrey (meaning Williams) didn't do it this way. [more inside]
posted by cessair at 7:34 PM PST - 2 comments

Now he’s about to ask a question that will be about the twilight zone

Which original Twilight Zone episodes haven’t influenced another show yet?
posted by michaelh at 7:29 PM PST - 6 comments

Being expected to smile on command....

... and how to deal with it without getting fired. [more inside]
posted by Armed Only With Hubris at 6:03 PM PST - 27 comments

the past, it wanted me dead

Does it really matter if my problem is PTSD and not depression? [more inside]
posted by unannihilated at 5:49 PM PST - 16 comments

Avoiding a TSA pat-down

My husband had a hip replacement in 2016. Since then, he has had multiple TSA pat-downs at the airport whenever we travel and he really hates the experience. He doesn't want to fly anymore. This could be a problem for me as we both have elderly family members out of state who could need our help at a moments notice. Could he avoid the pat-downs if he obtains a TSA PreCheck or a letter from his hip surgeon? Since I'm the one who will be doing the footwork on his behalf, I'm wondering if anyone on this website has any experience with this.
posted by htm at 3:56 PM PST - 17 comments

LEGO Assistance

Dug out my childhood LEGOs from storage and have the urge to build something. It’s 2019. There has to be a tech-y way to do this. [more inside]
posted by Diskeater at 3:52 PM PST - 4 comments

So what's Auburn WA like these days?

My dream job is relocating my family and I to the Kent area, and I'm expanding my house search to include nearby cities. It's been a decade since I've lived thereabouts... So what's Auburn like these days? [more inside]
posted by lordcorvid at 3:51 PM PST - 1 comment

Need tricks for decoupling self-esteem from publishing rejection

Hi! I used to be good at the whole work hard and the rest is a mystery stuff. Then I got some small successes and started shooting for prestigious outlets. Now the rejection stings. How can I return to my prior state of zen where I sort of didn't give a fuck? Has anybody experienced this anxiety arc and overcome it? [more inside]
posted by angrycat at 2:50 PM PST - 8 comments

How to get earwax out of upholstery ?

How to get earwax out of upholstery ? [more inside]
posted by raccoon409 at 1:06 PM PST - 13 comments

Which post shower bathrobe?

Helper a maximizer find a post shower bathrobe - do you have a favorite bathrobe, or an opinion between Snowe, Parachute, Sunlighten, Natori, and Rough Linen? [more inside]
posted by troytroy at 1:06 PM PST - 9 comments

Help me dock my older MacBook Air (2015)

My work gave me a somewhat older MacBook Air - 13 inch "early 2015." I'd like to plug it into a home setup with an external monitor (ideally two screens). Have you done this? What's the best way? [more inside]
posted by Mid at 12:02 PM PST - 6 comments

TSA 3-1-1 quart bag size question

What is the actual TSA rule regarding the size of the 3-1-1 carry-on bag for liquids? It seems like the size would be straightforward--1 quart--but I'm seeing several "TSA compliant" bags on Amazon that are well over 1 quart in size. [more inside]
posted by Quiscale at 11:45 AM PST - 10 comments

"You are such a drag."

Recommendations needed for venues for social events for queer academics in Washington, D.C., please! [more inside]
posted by joycehealy at 11:42 AM PST - 4 comments

How does your (allotment) garden grow?

I just added my name to the list for a plot in my neighbourhood garden, and I'm looking for tips, tricks, resources and advice for a rookie vegetable gardener. [more inside]
posted by notquitejane at 10:03 AM PST - 19 comments

Generic Lexapro for a non insured person?

Hello all! My friend is living in Hawaii and just took a job where she won't be insured until July. She asked me if I had any idea where to get generic lexapro online? I have no idea but she is a fantastic friend to me and I thought if anyone would know, someone here might. I have never had any luck with meds online beyond retin-a. Any ideas?
posted by pairofshades at 10:03 AM PST - 11 comments

You loved “alternative” music in the 80s. What do you listen to now?

I loved bands like Love and Rockets, The Smiths, and XTC in the 80s. If you did, too, what are you listening to now? I’m not specifically looking for things that sound just like those beloved 80s bands (although that’s OK, too). I’m just wondering what folks who have similar past loves are enjoying now.
posted by TEA at 9:12 AM PST - 39 comments

When did jalapeno potato chips come out?

My boy asked me this and it is a surprisingly difficult question to Google: when were jalapeno chips released as a flavor? Who did it first? (Note: tiny-batch-in-a-brow-bag or guy-on-a-cart stories are welcome, but I mean a decent-sized brand.) (Also note: our guess is '87.)
posted by AgentRocket at 8:49 AM PST - 5 comments

Please help me diagnose this plumbing problem

We have this thermostatic shower fixture. The cold water does not flow --- we turn the lower knob to start the water, but only hot water comes out. The shower is at full pressure when the thermostat is all the way to hot, and as we turn the upper knob down in temperature the pressure gets lower and lower, until the temperature is all the way to cold and no water is flowing even though the on/off knob is still all the way "on." [more inside]
posted by slenderloris at 8:45 AM PST - 5 comments

Do I need a lawyer for my particular naturalization application?

I have a misdemeanor charge prior to receiving my green card that I am concerned may require a lawyer to fill out my naturalization application. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 6:34 AM PST - 11 comments

Help this beginner buy a yoga mat?

I have my eye on a 10mm thick TPE yoga mat. Is it the right choice for a fat beginner? [more inside]
posted by whitelotus at 3:24 AM PST - 17 comments

Could someone who reads Chinese please help me uninstall a Win10 add-on?

I rashly installed an add-on for Win 10 (Clover 3) providing tabs for File Explorer. After installing, I quickly realized I don't want to use it, and further reading suggests it might be best to uninstall it altogether, but instructions to do so are only provided in Chinese. [more inside]
posted by tenderly at 1:57 AM PST - 6 comments

I wish to reduce a multihundred page PDF document.

I wish to take a multihundred page PDF document and reduce it to only the dozens of pages I require. [more inside]
posted by Evilspork at 12:35 AM PST - 10 comments

When / how do I take no for an answer?

I have always been taught to never take no for an answer from business books- especially from someone not authorized to tell you yes (I think that one was from church, which I no longer attend). I am not afraid of confrontation or challenging authority and can be aggressive while my partner is the opposite. Doing so has yielded me more often than not great results (upgrades in hotel rooms, discounts, access to the things i wanted). However i realize it's a problem in my relationship [more inside]
posted by soooo at 12:32 AM PST - 35 comments

February 22

Why aren't there more photographs?

What are some examples of famous people/events/etc that are surprisingly under-represented in photographs? For example, there are only two surviving photographs of Chopin. What are some other important subjects that we don't have many photos of? (Speaking after the advent of photography, of course.)
posted by mermaidcafe at 9:20 PM PST - 13 comments

unaccompanied men singing without repeating themselves?

I just heard The Cruel Wars by The Dreadnoughts. I love (1) that it's unaccompanied men's voices and (2) the lyrics are through-...written? Every line is novel. I don't have to sit through the chorus eight times. What songs or genres have these two properties of (1) unaccompanied men (2) not repeating themselves? Bonus points for recordings featuring men with deep voices.
posted by meaty shoe puppet at 8:23 PM PST - 10 comments

be my fantasy menu generator

Difficulty level: time machine [more inside]
posted by unstrungharp at 7:37 PM PST - 11 comments

Best Online Ticketing Platforms

What are your favorite online ticketing platforms? This will be for a 3 day event in the USA, with 150 tickets available. Most important: it needs to be easy to use. I can't use a platform that requires an app to download, or is intrusive, etc. I've been less than happy with Eventbrite, and I'm looking for unique alternatives. [more inside]
posted by weed donkey at 7:06 PM PST - 7 comments

Co-op game similar to Stardew Valley

Hi all, I know there are some gamers in here so I was hoping y'all could help this non-gamer out with picking a new game. I actually went most of my life not enjoying playing computer games at all but fell in love with Stardew Valley. I loved that at any time, I could choose to do something zen (fishing), productive (farming), or exciting (mining). I also loved that it was co-op but we weren't forced to be together or cooperate all the time. Are there any similar games out there?
posted by massofintuition at 6:30 PM PST - 15 comments

Finding specific TRS adapter cable

I am looking for a specific type of cable. One end: 3.5mm TRS male (to go into a cell phone's TRRS jack). Other end: 1/4inch TRS female (to plus a pair of headphones into). [more inside]
posted by thegears at 6:07 PM PST - 7 comments

Help, our landlord's daughter lives downstairs and aggressively hates us

We live above our landlord's adult daughter, who 1.) is generally very angry and aggressive, 2.) does and is upset by confusing things, and 3.) hates us. This has been escalating for almost a year and we don't know how to handle it. Details inside. [more inside]
posted by bugperson at 4:36 PM PST - 26 comments

Shower begins hots, gets colder as the handle turns.

The bath/shower in my kids' bathroom has a single handle on the faucet. It recently broke, so I got a replacement at the hardware store and put the new one one. Easy! Except for some reason, when you turn the handle now, scalding hot water comes out right away. Huh? [more inside]
posted by Pater Aletheias at 4:26 PM PST - 4 comments

Can I recycle plastic jugs that have contained fertilizer?

I go through a lot of fertilizer, so I mix and store several gallons at a time, in plastic (high-density polyethylene) milk jugs. I keep the jugs long enough (between 3 and 6 months) that by the time I replace them, the inside has often been covered by an unknown brown substance, which will mostly but not completely wipe off of the plastic. [more inside]
posted by Spathe Cadet at 4:10 PM PST - 11 comments

Leg massagers - do they work?

I stand around a lot at work, and my feet/legs are killing me. I saw an ad for a leg massager and want to know if those actually help or aren't dangerous. [more inside]
posted by LoonyLovegood at 3:54 PM PST - 12 comments

What is this thingamabob?

A friend found this while cleaning out a relative's house. Any ideas as to what it could be? This is the only picture available.
posted by fish tick at 3:36 PM PST - 3 comments

Best Computer Eyecandy - 2019 Edition

What are some of the most amazing and/or trippy graphics display software of today? [more inside]
posted by glonous keming at 2:54 PM PST - 1 comment

How can I be both powerful and good?

By all appearances, I seem to be charismatic and dominant, and I love the feeling of power. I also really really want to not be a jerk. Seeking advice for how to straddle this line. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:41 PM PST - 26 comments

Sell to a stalker/harasser?

A person who has been serially harassing me over the last few years has bought a product from me. Should I or should I not refund the money and not fulfill the order? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:41 PM PST - 21 comments

Eating well recipes while working full-time and grad school-ing

Yesterday I had a conversation with a number of my grad school colleagues where we are all really struggling with getting enough to eat/eating healthy-ish. Many of my classmates work full-time and then have classes in the evenings. We do not have access to a refrigerator or microwave. [more inside]
posted by forkisbetter at 1:48 PM PST - 14 comments

Most convenient Park and Ride options to Boston on I-90

Hi everybody. I have to pick up a laptop on St. James Avenue in Boston for a temp assignment on Monday the 25th, and ideally I'm supposed to be there in the AM, though I've advised them that I'm not entirely sure when I'll get there. I live in Essex County, NY, which isn't exactly next door, and I hate driving in large cities as it makes me very tense and uncomfortable. [more inside]
posted by DavidfromBA at 1:37 PM PST - 10 comments

How to tent all the way up the Pacific coast?

I will be road-tripping from San Diego to see my parents out on the Olympic Peninsula in the second half of May. It's been 20 years since I last went camping, and that was SCA events; I've not been in a single-family camping situation since I was a kid. So I have been looking up tips and advice online but still have a few questions. I have looked at earlier Asks, especially this one, but still want more specific info. Also my anxiety says I need to know ahead of time exactly what the process of arriving at a campsite and dealing with check in is like. [more inside]
posted by buildmyworld at 12:55 PM PST - 13 comments

Need Vancouver tips for week-long, but mobility-impaired visit

I'm spending next week in Vancouver, including three days off work on my own. Great, but due to a knee injury I can't stand up, walk or cycle for extended periods. Any recommendations for getting around and keeping myself entertained in the city? [more inside]
posted by wavelette at 12:42 PM PST - 8 comments

Buying an Android phone - how to verify it's really new?

How can I check that an Android phone sold as "New" is actually new? [more inside]
posted by anadem at 12:07 PM PST - 4 comments

Switching hard drive on dead iMac & trouble shooting help

Looking to cover my bases as I switch out the hard drive on my iMac EMC2389 model #A1311. Would the Mac-friendly hivemind help me think this through, reassure, or correct me? [more inside]
posted by Tchad at 12:07 PM PST - 5 comments

Eclectic or oddball museums that are worth a detour?

The lovely Mrs Fnorde and I were at the Bennington Museum in Vermont the other day, and she was again reminded of how much she likes that kind of quirky museum, where the collection might have more to do with the accidents of local history and donor hobby horses than with a mainstream curatorial vision. Can you recommend other museums that might scratch a similar itch? [more inside]
posted by Jasper Fnorde at 11:52 AM PST - 58 comments

How do I go about requesting copies of court exhibits in Canada?

I'm interesting in obtaining copies of actuarial reports used in court cases in Canada and having trouble figuring out how to do this. [more inside]
posted by NoneOfTheAbove at 11:50 AM PST - 5 comments

What would convince you to face anxiety?

What are the most compelling and succinct explanations you've heard for why coping with anxiety by avoiding the things that make you anxious is a bad idea, and why facing the things that make you anxious is a good idea? What would it take to convince you that anxiety goes away when you confront it, and the things that make you anxious will eventually no longer make you anxious if you face them repeatedly? [more inside]
posted by quiet coyote at 11:43 AM PST - 26 comments

Resources for the white mom of a multiracial yet white-passing child?

I'm white. My husband is multiracial. Our toddler is also multiracial, but he strongly resembles me. I'm not exactly sure how to deal with this in the short term, or what I should be thinking about and reading up on for the long term. [more inside]
posted by the milkman, the paper boy at 11:05 AM PST - 10 comments

Problems downloading large zip file from DropBox

I need to download a large (160 GB) zip file from DropBox. It keeps getting corrupted. Is there any way to improve reliability for the download process? [more inside]
posted by JD Sockinger at 10:49 AM PST - 8 comments

Looking to understand more about desegregation busing

I've been reading articles about desegregation busing lately, trying to learn about its pros and cons. It seems like most of what I come across just says "The only reason to oppose busing is racism" which seems highly reductive. Was this idea ever popular before it was enacted? Were students really forced into 2-hour-long bus rides? Why was busing, rather than increasing funding to poor schools, decided on as the way to decrease the achievement gap between races? [more inside]
posted by seiryuu at 9:49 AM PST - 21 comments

Fish oil capsules - safe?

Do fish oil capsules have heavy metals in them? How are they made? How are the heavy metals removed? [more inside]
posted by bergnotburg at 8:53 AM PST - 11 comments

How do we survive a kitchen remodel?

We are about to do a major update of our 30-year-old kitchen, replacing all the cabinets and countertops, removing a soffit, and repositioning the stove and refrigerator. We like the contractor and his crew, but previous projects like replacing doors and molding were disruptive enough and this job is bigger and focuses on what, in practice, is the center of our home. Trepidation. I've got trepidation. What advice, tips, etc. do you have for coming through this with our sanity intact?
posted by DrGail at 8:40 AM PST - 27 comments

Debt/financial counselor near Philly? Bonus: Korean-speaking

We'd like to set my in-laws up to meet/work with a debt counselor or other FA advisor who can help them figure out a plan to deal with their financial problems. Does anyone have a recommendation in the Philadelphia PA area? (Korean-speaking would be ideal but is not 100% critical) [more inside]
posted by alleycat01 at 8:25 AM PST - 4 comments

Great contemporary movie soundtrack albums

Back in the '90s movie OSTs where my main music acquaintance vector, with the best ones offering a curated, opinionated slice of the current musical zeitgeist, exposing my ears to music I wouldn't have come into contact otherwise, but within a recognizable framework. What great current movie soundtracks would you recommend and why? [more inside]
posted by signal at 7:37 AM PST - 22 comments

Looking for a PC Game Title From the Early 2000s

There was a puzzle-adventure game I played in the early 2000s on my PC. It wasn't Myst, but it was extremely similar and easier. I need to know the name of it, but I can't remember. [more inside]
posted by TinWhistle at 6:17 AM PST - 5 comments

Cool ways to keep track of movies

I host a monthly "Bad Movie Movie Night" for me and a bunch of friends, and I'm looking for a creative/funny/interesting way to keep track of the movies we watch and our group's over-all assessment of how bad the movie was. [more inside]
posted by PuppetMcSockerson at 5:56 AM PST - 4 comments

difficult boss question number 4384

freind wants to change groups. friend anticipates getting screwed. friend needs help. [more inside]
posted by koroshiya at 1:07 AM PST - 8 comments

Should I have "the talk"with him now or give him some more time?

The guy I'm seeing pulled away and came back. Should I ask him about why he came back and get some clarification or just wait and let things unfold naturally? [more inside]
posted by yellowpurplered at 12:43 AM PST - 27 comments

February 21

Spiderless PC Game Suggestions Solicited

I have a shiny new gaming laptop. Help me decide what to play! [more inside]
posted by LadyNibbler at 7:18 PM PST - 15 comments

Dead Tech: Tape player + film projector

For retired educators and others who remember past times; I was in elemetary and middle school in the late 80s and first half of the 90s, so hop in your time machines and help me remember what this example of dead tech described inside is called. [more inside]
posted by Fukiyama at 7:12 PM PST - 13 comments

Make my Mac recognize that it indeed has free space for an OS reinstall

During a Mojave update on my iMac, something went wrong and my iMac got stuck in a startup loop. So, I'm trying to reinstall fresh. I started in restore mode to reinstall, but it wouldn't let me install Mojave on my internal hard drive because there was only 15 gigs free and it needed about 2 gigs more. [more inside]
posted by jonathanhughes at 7:06 PM PST - 8 comments

Zero bugs crawling on my neck is the right number

I’m pretty sure this bug that I literally found crawling on my neck while sitting in bed (why why why) is not a bedbug. Please reassure me. If it is not (carpet beetle maybe?) I still don’t like that! What do I do? Are there more in my bed? Am I going to sleep tonight? HOW?
posted by loolie at 6:17 PM PST - 7 comments

Teenage niece would like therapy for DPD but parents not supportive.

Help me advise my 15-year old niece on how to independently access mental health care in a mid-size Midwestern city. [more inside]
posted by prairiecatherine at 5:27 PM PST - 10 comments

An American Werewolf in Canada

[Cultural Differences / Armchair Anthropology Filter] I am moving to Canada next month. American expatriates in Canada, what do you wish you had known before moving? What small (or glaring) cultural, institutional, infrastructural or procedural differences did you start to notice after being there for a while? (Also, for the Canadians: are there things that you wish American expatriates knew before they got there, or wish they’d stop doing or start doing?) [more inside]
posted by nightrecordings at 4:36 PM PST - 77 comments

what do you call a mint worker?

Carpenter, plumber, teacher, doctor, lawyer. Mint Worker? Is there a special name for amint worker? [more inside]
posted by freethefeet at 4:17 PM PST - 13 comments

Is this legit advice for dealing with a home invasion?

"If somebody has entered your home, the first thing you want to do is say your full name very loud. Then your best bet is to go ahead and soil yourself." [more inside]
posted by akk2014 at 3:55 PM PST - 19 comments

IU School of Music Vocal Faculty in 1990

I am struggling to find this and hoped maybe someone out there can help. I need to know the roster of Vocal Music faculty from 1990 for the Indiana University School of Music. (Not notable alumni or "star" teachers from yore, but who was actually on staff at that time, teaching voice.) Thanks so much!
posted by I_Love_Bananas at 3:20 PM PST - 4 comments

Suggestions on negotiating a rent renewal increase?

I live in a corporate-owned building (Bozzuto) and recently received my renewal letter. Recommendations on how to successfully negotiate a smaller increase? [more inside]
posted by dubious_dude at 3:11 PM PST - 13 comments

"Queuing up" things to talk about in social media/electronic age

I've spent alot of last 15 years posting on Facebook or websites or blogs about great things or funny things that come to my head, or shooting off a text or IM to my wife. I'd love to "hold" those things so I can talk about them in person. If you've been this way and have changed to expressing more of what's going on in person, how did you do it? (not using social media is one option, but let's talk about others). How'd you remember these things? How'd you make yourself wait. [more inside]
posted by sandmanwv at 1:42 PM PST - 9 comments

Redness and Burning with most moisturizers?

I am sensitive to a lot of moisturisers which will cause redness and burning sensations. [more inside]
posted by RearWindow at 1:34 PM PST - 29 comments

How do I easily wire my office for internet?

I'm moving into a new office and for various reasons the landlord is unable to hard-wire internet into my space. The office previously was wired, but then the neighboring office in the suite pulled the wiring into his office. In short, I have the plug but no connection. Is there a simple way to split the wiring so that we can both have wired Internet? The vendor told the landlord to consider a "quick switch" but I can't find any good resources on that option. The landlord is fine with anything I want to do so long as it's disruptive or cause a lot of damage.
posted by gabrielsamoza at 12:44 PM PST - 12 comments

You say you want me to include my SSN in all our email correspondence?

I need to contact the manager in charge of the Federal Benefits Unit office in the American consulate in Guadalajara, Mexico. I'm not getting anywhere with Google. [more inside]
posted by bricoleur at 12:40 PM PST - 2 comments

Movies or TV heavily featuring magazines / newspapers / digital media?

I've always enjoyed movies, TV shows, documentaries, etc. where the day to day of the news-oriented publishing business are involved. For example, Ugly Betty, The Devil Wears Prada, The Intern, or the BBC's series about how Vogue UK operates. Got any recommendations? [more inside]
posted by wackybrit at 12:18 PM PST - 28 comments

What else can I put in my heels?

I just scored a pair of these shoes on EBay... the heels are removable and you can put anything inside. They were also originally sold filled with glitter, as well as Barbie doll heads. My first instinct would be to put fish inside, but that would be too cruel to the fish so I'm NOT willing to do that. But I would love more ideas! Ideally nothing too expensive or heavy, though I doubt I'll be doing any distance walking in them, so some weight is probably manageable. And I don't know if they're actually watertight. Ideas?
posted by Mchelly at 10:30 AM PST - 50 comments

Help me martial art.

Last year I shed about 30# through some combination of not eating so badly and going to the gym. I hate the gym and stopped going and have put half the weight back on. I am trying to start going again (and to stop eating all the everything) but I'm also curious to try something else. [more inside]
posted by Smearcase at 9:59 AM PST - 16 comments

looking for a history of plagiarism

I'm trying to remember the title and author of a book I once read about plagiarism. My recollection is that I read this in the first half of the 1990s and it was a fairly recent book at that time, so probably not published before 1980. [more inside]
posted by maurice at 9:57 AM PST - 4 comments

How do I anonymously report animal abuse/neglect?

I am aware of a house where a number of dogs—let's say one or two dozen—are being kept in poor conditions. What is the best way to anonymously report this? (Content note: no descriptions of animal abuse inside.) [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 9:50 AM PST - 12 comments

Appropriate attire in Las Vegas?

My (also female) best friend and I are taking a trip to Las Vegas in a few weeks to attend a few shows (among them, a bucket list concert). I've never been to Las Vegas longer than a flight layover. I'm also a plus sized uncool introvert. What on earth should I wear? [more inside]
posted by librarianamy at 9:45 AM PST - 10 comments

Bulk rename files in one folder to match irregular list in another?

I have two folders of several thousand files. One is a bunch of sequentially-named, identical text files (.txt). The other folder contains the same quantity of files of a different extension (lets say .mp3) that are NOT sequential nor ordered nor identical in any other way than they share the same extension. I need to rename all of the text files to have the same filenames as all of the audio files. Help? Possibly using Adobe Bridge? Other? [more inside]
posted by sandra_s at 9:11 AM PST - 13 comments

juul woes

I have been using a Juul to help with quitting cigarettes. It was working for a while but now abruptly I'm having issues. Help me understand why this is happening and how to fix it. [more inside]
posted by thereemix at 8:51 AM PST - 5 comments

Gmail won't load

For a couple weeks now, Gmail won't load on my Chromebook. Apparently it's been an issue for others. I went through the protocols I found online. Delete cache, and so on. No success. It works in Incognito mode. The slow, standard, clunky mode works but, yuck. Any suggestions? Thanks.
posted by holdenjordahl at 8:11 AM PST - 11 comments

A bit of Oooo, Matron? Bedroom gymnastics? Rumpy van Humpy?

Without being crude, or too physically descriptive, what are good metaphors or entendres or figures of speech for an act of intimacy between two (or more) people? The context is for use within a speech to be given at a wedding reception that can be a little risque, but shouldn't be tiresomely crude - the audience may include families, people of a devout religious persuasion, and the people being referred to who, although open-minded, won't want blunt references. Thank you.
posted by Wordshore at 7:53 AM PST - 56 comments

Career advancement resources wanted for 33 year old professional.

A client of mine is 33 years old, working in the medical supply field (specifically, selling orthopedic braces to hospitals in the US). He is looking to move his career forward in that field or a related area. My client's company does not offer solid career advancement opportunities/resources. I'm hoping this esteemed group would be able to point us to resources that might assist him. These resources might look like support groups, online forums/groups, online/irl educational opportunities, books, etc. (all ideas welcome). Thanks in advance!
posted by HuronBob at 7:24 AM PST - 2 comments

Present for post office workers?

Workers at my local post office basically have to do extra work for me and are being nice about it. I would like to bring them a small (edible?) gift to maintain good will and say thank you. Can I? What do I bring? [more inside]
posted by Frowner at 6:46 AM PST - 13 comments

GoPro HERO3+ Black battery

A secondhand GoPro HERO3+ Black won't stay on for more than a couple of minutes. Is this just because the original battery is old? [more inside]
posted by wenestvedt at 5:53 AM PST - 3 comments

FoodSafetyFilter: re: briefish power outage & raw meats

The interwebs say if your fridge has been above 40°F for more than 4 hours, perishable things should be chucked out. What if you have a fridge starting at 32°, and then the power goes out for only a half hour or 40 minutes? Mostly I'm concerned with some raw meats, which have been packaged in plastic. Paranoid me says "frak, toss it" but I feel like I'm being overly cautious. Ambient room temp during outage was probably 65°F. The fridge is otherwise consistently cold, s'far as my thermometers in there show. Science?
posted by bitterkitten at 5:34 AM PST - 12 comments

Quitting weed cold turkey

I have bipolar disorder and an anxiety disorder and until three days ago a daily marijuana habit that was getting worse and worse (I would smoke constantly and it barely even got me high anymore). I thought stopping cold turkey would clear my head but I've feeling my psych symptoms really strongly ever since. I'm getting back into treatment but could really use some suggestions on how to get through this. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:09 AM PST - 10 comments

Was this assault?

I've been reading a lot about #MeToo and books associated with sexual assault, domestic violence, and other types of violence. I think I may have been assaulted, but I'm not sure. (NSFW) [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:07 AM PST - 22 comments

I want to propose to my boyfriend! Should I?

Hey guys Anonymous because I really want to keep it under wraps! Anyway, I have been with my boyfriend for nearly five years. We've been living together for a little longer than a year, and things here have been great. I am thinking about proposing to him and would like some advice and insights, please! [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:07 AM PST - 18 comments

February 20

Enlighten me, Midwesterners!

A friend is having a cheese ball and poker party. Each guest must bring a cheese ball to be admitted, and I have never tasted one. Please help me make the most delicious/interesting vegetarian or pescatarian cheese ball imaginable. [more inside]
posted by charmedimsure at 11:53 PM PST - 17 comments

Moving past needing an apology from someone who victimized you

Let's say that somebody victimized you, and is not ready or able to say they are sorry. How does one get past it? [more inside]
posted by karmachameleon at 11:48 PM PST - 11 comments

How to stop getting up early after travelling west?

I'm still on that contract, flying 2700 km east every month or two for five days at a time. I've conquered eastward travel (yay tips in that thread + flight schedule changing), but each time I get back home - flying west for two/three timezones depending on time of year, landing at 7AM local time after maybe 4 hours of sleep before the flight - for days or weeks I wake up at 4AM, far too wired to get back to sleep. This time around, a week of 5 hours per night has left me a zombie desperate for solutions. [more inside]
posted by I claim sanctuary at 10:00 PM PST - 5 comments

Quirky get away

What is an amazing, strange, eccentric festival, conference, activity happening in your town in the next 3 - 4 months that is not well known or easily found through a google search? [more inside]
posted by hworth at 9:05 PM PST - 23 comments

Sugar begone!

My processed sugar consumption is digging me in to an early grave. Naturally occurring fruit sugars and local honey are ok. Everything else needs to go, but sugar substitutes like Splenda aren't for me (or my digestive system.) What specific programs and resources did you use to help you gradually but definitively quit sugar in the way that I need to?
posted by Hermione Granger at 8:31 PM PST - 26 comments

Gift idea for hardworking mail carrier

My mail carrier has been out in all weather this winter, totally reliable and always pleasant. I know I can't give cash or gift cards. So what could I give them that they would actually appreciate? [more inside]
posted by Emmy Rae at 8:01 PM PST - 14 comments

Seeking Kosher cookbook

I am interested in revisiting kosher cooking to make food that actually tastes delicious. [more inside]
posted by Lawn Beaver at 7:51 PM PST - 9 comments

Is it possible to "trade" in a recently purchased new car?

How difficult is it, if at all, to trade in a recently purchased new car and get something used? Is this even a good idea? [more inside]
posted by nurgle at 7:23 PM PST - 13 comments

Should I move in with my (divorced) girlfriend (who has a kid)?

It’s your basic cohabitation question—except for complicated grown-ups. Excruciating snowflake details inside. [more inside]
posted by sureshot at 5:59 PM PST - 15 comments

Tourist in Australia - Best options for severe migraine treatment?

US traveler in South Melbourne suburb (Carnegie) has severe migraine. If it doesn't improve soon, is the emergency room at a public hospital the next step? Or some kind of private non-hospital clinic? [more inside]
posted by under_petticoat_rule at 4:40 PM PST - 9 comments

How to clean a beloved piece of clothing?

I have a 1950s cream crochet cardigan which has a long history in my life and which is suddenly (higher humidity in Hong Kong?) showing 60 years of sweat stains along the neck and pits. Is there anything I can do? [more inside]
posted by frumiousb at 4:08 PM PST - 9 comments

What’s your experience with this cat-scratching deterrent spray?

Here’s a link to the product. [more inside]
posted by captainsohler at 2:27 PM PST - 9 comments

Help Finding a Mac program from the past and possible replacement?

I'm seeking a program for the Mac that allows you to review a list of resources (images and sounds) contained in anything you drag and drop on it with the option to save them. Does something like this exist now? I had something like this back in OS 9 and I remember it being very versatile.
posted by ooklah at 2:24 PM PST - 9 comments

How do I snack on seaweed?

I love nori, wakame and, honestly, I‘m crazy for the umami flavour in general. But I‘ve only ever encountered nori as a maki wrapper, and wakame in salad. Now I‘ve seen sheets of seaweed at the asian store - is there anything quick and easy I can do with them to make a Thing To Snack On for myself?
posted by Omnomnom at 2:15 PM PST - 33 comments

Dead Simple Dinner Ideas

What are some dead-simple dinner ideas? Looking for stuff that’s even easier than the “Easy 30-minute Weeknight Dinner” listicles, due to laziness, burnout, small kitchen, and temporary weird living conditions. There are 2 of us and we eat meat but no seafood. Sadly we don't have a crock pot or Instapot. [more inside]
posted by jschu at 1:57 PM PST - 39 comments

Gmail is spontaneously deleting individual emails from threads

I am getting the same message described here and can retrieve the messages once I see that notice but the problem is... I didn't delete anything. [more inside]
posted by DarlingBri at 1:50 PM PST - 4 comments

Are there any nice 15.6 inch women's laptop leather bags online?

I am looking for a leather work laptop bag that will fit a 15.6 inch Lenovo Gaming computer that I want to use for work as well. I cannot seem to find a decent one, especially since my laptop is over 15 inches. Price range could be from $100 to $300.
posted by RearWindow at 1:27 PM PST - 3 comments

Buying tickets to a concert in Portugal

I want to buy tickets to a sold-out concert at Altice Arena in Lisbon, Portugal. Can you recommend a reputable reseller? I've seen Viagogo, but also see mixed reviews. Also, more generally, do you have any warnings specific to Altice Arena relating to buying tickets from a reseller? For example, I've seen warnings that if your name doesn't match that of the original purchaser, you may be refused entry. I'd be traveling from outside Portugal to see the concert, so appreciate all tips and advice. Thanks
posted by smokyjoe at 1:21 PM PST - 2 comments

Kitty boo-boo

ashy kitty has a cut on her nose. It doesn't look bad but hasn't healed. Vet or not? Toll paid inside. [more inside]
posted by ashy_sock at 1:10 PM PST - 9 comments

Competitive Intelligence - Digital tools

Can you recommend digital/online tools to use to conduct competitive intelligence? For example, Crayon is one company that lets you compare products and website changes. Are there other companies that offer similar tools? If you were to learn from your competitors, what tools would you use?
posted by quiverandquill at 1:03 PM PST - 2 comments

Midtown coffee digs

A friend and I are planning on meeting at the Morgan Library & Museum in Midtown Manhattan (on Madison between 36th and 37th) on Saturday morning and would like to grab a casual breakfast at a coffee shop or bakery beforehand around 9 am. Where in the area has delicious pastries and/or breakfast sandwiches and lots of comfortable seating? [more inside]
posted by andrewesque at 12:37 PM PST - 4 comments

Please recommend books with lots of exploding spaceships

One of my favorite kinds of science fiction is “naval warfare in space”. I love strategy, huge fleets of ships, and long, slow setups to big explosions. I think “The Hand Of God” and “Resurrection Ship” were among the best episodes of Battlestar Galactica, but get bored with all the bits that aren’t talking tactics. If a book has a picture of battleships on the cover, I’m likely to at least pick it up. Please recommend your favorite “space combat” science fiction! [more inside]
posted by a device for making your enemy change his mind at 11:35 AM PST - 52 comments

Shared laundry with newborn?

My wife and I are condo hunting, and also planning to start a family in the next few years. Real estate is expensive here, and something that would make a condo more affordable for us would be to buy one without in-suite laundry. What's it like raising young kids with shared laundry? [more inside]
posted by no regrets, coyote at 11:18 AM PST - 45 comments

Books, long articles, documentaries about subcultures and communities

There's a particular type of nonfiction I find absolutely irresistible- the deep-dive into a community. Like Paris is Burning, Can't Stop Won't Stop, Kamikaze Biker, Frederick Wiseman documentaries, even this recent FPP post on the Warren Ellis Forum. What all these works share in common is that rather than focus on just one person and their experience, as most works about a community tend to do, they examine their communities at a more macro level. Help me find more like them?
posted by perplexion at 11:06 AM PST - 17 comments

"You can't make toast with a pair of loafers."

I'm looking for a TV commercial that aired in Boston around 1982-'83. I don't remember the product, but the ad ended with a man in a suit and tie returning home with a shopping bag, opening the bag, and throwing two pieces of bread at a pair of men's shoes still in the box. A male voiceover closed the ad with "you can't make toast with a pair of loafers." [more inside]
posted by pxe2000 at 10:41 AM PST - 3 comments

Help me be a single issue voter

Where can someone who is relatively unfamiliar with environmental policy go to understand Democratic primary candidates' history and proposals on climate issues? [more inside]
posted by mosst at 9:32 AM PST - 4 comments

Benefits of digital eye exam?

I’ve worn glasses for 30 years and I always have difficulty adjusting to a new prescription and new frames. I’ve only ever had traditional eye exams. If you’re like me and you’ve gotten instead a digital eye exam, we’re you pleased with the results? [more inside]
posted by Admiral Haddock at 9:31 AM PST - 5 comments

I hate my new progressive lenses, is what I see normal?

I’ve been having trouble seeing up close for a awhile and finally saw an eye doctor a few weeks ago. I apparently needed both far and near correction, so they recommended progressive lenses. I just picked up my glasses yesterday. They are awful and I can't get anything done with them on. I know that it is supposed to take time to get used to them, but I’m wondering what that really means. [more inside]
posted by Sabby at 8:42 AM PST - 28 comments

Snake Neighbour

It's 3am and I've just been crying for a couple of hours. I moved house a couple of weeks ago and a couple of hours ago I just met one of the people which shares the house that's been turned into studios and they had their snake with them. I can't deal with living two metres from a snake. There's no-one I can call because it's fine and legitimate and this is brown snake land but I'm weak and afraid. How do.you sleep with a snake just there [more inside]
posted by AnhydrousLove at 8:26 AM PST - 30 comments

One Evening in Jacksonville, FL

I'll be arriving in Jacksonville, FL on Sunday (2/24) around 4PM and I'm looking for something to do for the evening. Ideally this something would include art or music, and maybe something to eat while looking at the ocean. [more inside]
posted by sacrifix at 8:22 AM PST - 3 comments

Two weeks in Kyoto

I'm lucky to be visiting a friend who's living in Kyoto for two weeks in early March, and will be staying with him. [more inside]
posted by elsmith at 8:03 AM PST - 6 comments

After water damage to ceiling, what next?

In a roof leak, I sustained this damage to my ceiling and window frame. Can you point me forward? [more inside]
posted by LonnieK at 7:48 AM PST - 6 comments

What if I wanted to design my own dishware?

Is the process feasable for someone like me? [more inside]
posted by fantasticness at 6:42 AM PST - 9 comments

Driving Around in the Canadian Rockies

This summer my husband and I want to fly into Vancouver to see friends and then drive around in some beautiful nature. We will have about ten days, in July. Can you recommend some specific towns or areas to see? I'm also considering maybe driving from Vancouver all the way to Calgary and leaving from there, so let me know what you think of that option. [more inside]
posted by something something at 6:38 AM PST - 8 comments

I need GTD but it's giving me anxiety

I can't do Step 1. HELP ME. [more inside]
posted by MiraK at 5:50 AM PST - 23 comments

Adding pages to a small booklet

A bencher is a pocket-size softcover prayerbook, usually stapled, used for the Hebrew grace after meals and various table songs. It's often given out as a favor at weddings and other lifecycle events. I want to add 2-3 songs to a standard bencher before giving it out to guests. Should I put stickers in the back? Enclose a card and hope it sticks in the bencher by friction? Thank you for your thoughts.
posted by 8603 at 4:09 AM PST - 7 comments

another hpv question

I'm 23 and I have a cervix. Gyno detected HPV. I feel absolutely awful and tainted and like my life has been ruined. How do I stop spiraling? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:12 AM PST - 18 comments

February 19

Quit job with nothing lined up or tough it out? (design, tech, career)

I saw some similar questions on MetaFilter but wanted perspective on my particular situation - I currently work at a small tech company and the general environment feels a pretty toxic. I have about 4 years of experience ((3 at this company) in my field (design work). Should I quit and take a break to recover? Or tough it out? [more inside]
posted by bellalia at 11:30 PM PST - 14 comments

8 Days for a Trip to Morocco from Chicago

Enough time for Marrakesh+Fez+High Atlas+Erg Chebbi Desert Overnight? [more inside]
posted by cycleback at 7:10 PM PST - 6 comments

Navien versus IBC boiler?

I am facing the prospect of replacing my New Coke/"We Are The World"-era Vaillant gas boiler and stand-alone water heater. One quote suggests a Navien NCB-E unit and the other suggests an IBC DC 20-125. Can anyone share experiences with either of these units, or compare them? [more inside]
posted by wenestvedt at 6:07 PM PST - 5 comments

Filter Gmail automatically?

I receive a lot of press releases regularly and annoyingly. I use Gmail both for freelance work (thus PR campaign bombs) and personal life. Can I auto-redirect all PR to a subfolder that I rarely check? [more inside]
posted by Jason and Laszlo at 5:07 PM PST - 11 comments

Ideas on how to use a delicious spicy gravy

I made a delicious Jamaican oxtail stew but misjudged the amount of liquid to oxtail. Now we have consumed all the oxtail and are left with this beautiful, delicious spicy gelatin filled stew gravy. It seems like a waste to throw it out - what else can I do with it? [more inside]
posted by Karaage at 4:42 PM PST - 18 comments

Objects in image are different than they appear

What are some examples of famous icons that are widely thought to depict the epitome of something good but actually depict something more insidious? I'm thinking of the "kissing sailor," or perhaps John Lennon's "Happy Xmas" song. Can be any media, but should be well known and recognized, and widely accepted as symbolizing something good and happy despite actually showing something much darker. [more inside]
posted by stillmoving at 4:22 PM PST - 50 comments

Ear plugs for a Metal Concert?

How do i protect my hearing for a Metal concert while preserving the quality? I would normally wear Etymotic ER20 earplugs to a concert, but metal is going to be that much louder i assume - I haven't been to a metal show before - and would like something with more hearing protection. [more inside]
posted by TheAdamist at 3:50 PM PST - 8 comments

Wool Blanket Poncho Sought

I bought a poncho in a touristy shop in Arizona or New Mexico twenty years ago that was basically a full or queen-size thick wool blanket with a slit for the head. It was incredibly warm and cozy but I lost it at some point. I'd like to buy one again, but my searches have not found anything. Where can I find these? [more inside]
posted by acidic at 3:33 PM PST - 6 comments

Phone Death

My Pixel 1 seems to be slowly dying. I am going to need a replacement probably but I had no plans to replace it for 2 years. I need options. [more inside]
posted by Aranquis at 2:43 PM PST - 16 comments

Is Light Tax Fraud Disqualifying in a Relationship?

I've been dating a woman I like a lot for almost 9 months. We get along great, we share many important values, we sometimes even talk about a longer-term future together. However. [more inside]
posted by Caxton1476 at 2:37 PM PST - 58 comments

Headphones that don't flatten hair

Can you recommend on-ear or over-the-ear headphones that don't leave a flat spot on the top your hair (if such a thing exists)? I'm looking for something that can block out sound fairly well (not necessarily noise cancelling), but won't flatten my hair. Preferably under $100 and comes with a portable case (not too huge) if possible but not absolute requirement. [more inside]
posted by roaring beast at 1:48 PM PST - 3 comments

What artwork represents best the face of compassion?

In the book the Compassionate Mind, it recommends that someone who wants to live a gentler and more compassionate life, have a go-to image, a face of compassion, they can visualize when they need to step into a safer, more loving mindspace. So I'd like to ask folks, what painting, photo, sculpture best depicts for you the comforting gentleness of compassion?
posted by storybored at 12:50 PM PST - 23 comments

Next steps in weightlifting for a forty (one) year old

I feel like I’m approaching an impasse with my current weightlifting routine, and have some concerns about its sustainability in the long run. I've had a hard time finding advice online on potential next steps. Details and caveats below. [more inside]
posted by gordie at 11:58 AM PST - 19 comments

Safe treatment of oxidized die-cast aluminum?

My SO has a turntable platter that’s made of die-cast aluminum. It has a greyish film in spots that I gather is oxidization (?). What are the best products (or ingredients) to treat it (clean it without damaging the finish, prevent further oxidization, make it look good)? What should be avoided? [more inside]
posted by cotton dress sock at 11:32 AM PST - 11 comments

VoIP phones that can handle multiple numbers?

I need a trio of VoIP phones that can handle one number/account shared between them all (so far so good) but also allow two of the phones to have their own numbers. [more inside]
posted by Muppet Pastor at 11:13 AM PST - 4 comments

If on a winter’s night a snow plow

What do you call the annoying pile of snow left at the end of the driveway after the plow drives by? You know, the kind that creates an extra hour of shoveling just when you thought you were done, and that’s twice as heavy on account of how densely packed and icy it is. I need something snarkier than “Ugh, I need to shovel the driveway again.”
posted by danceswithlight at 10:21 AM PST - 40 comments

New Zealand … Like Lord of the Rings

An unexpected opportunity to go to New Zealand just fell in my lap, and I am thrilled. I'll have a little over a week or so to explore! Flying into and out of Wellington (although I know there'll be at least one stop in between, and don't know very much about what it's like getting around NZ in general). What should I know, and what should I do? [more inside]
posted by caitcadieux at 9:52 AM PST - 6 comments

Social Science-ish PhD Pivoting to Industry (Data Science?)

I'm a first-year PhD student studying social variation in acoustic and articulatory phonetics. I'm thinking of pivoting from a career plan centered around getting an academic job into positioning myself for working in industry. I'm wondering what my options are, what material I should be focusing on, and what job prospects are like. [more inside]
posted by lilies.lilies at 9:48 AM PST - 7 comments

The right start to a condo association

My partner and I just bought our first home in a newly formed condo association in Massachusetts. As members of the first association of this building, what should we include in our bylaws? [more inside]
posted by thefang at 9:25 AM PST - 13 comments

Help with Freelance Rate

How much should a social-science PhD student (ABD) charge for freelance work? [more inside]
posted by MisantropicPainforest at 8:23 AM PST - 14 comments

Cat-proof seed starting

Recommend to me, please, your favorite seed starting/indoor growing kits. It absolutely must be cat-proof. [more inside]
posted by backseatpilot at 7:34 AM PST - 10 comments

Manga recommendations, please!

I want to become more familiar with manga. Where do I start? There is so much out there and it’s overwhelming (but in a good way!). What are the must-reads to give me a good overview of this genre? Assume that I am starting from square one with no previous exposure/knowledge.
posted by bookmammal at 7:13 AM PST - 16 comments

amazing music suggestions?

We splurged in a spectacular sound system and have been rediscovering music. What are some mind-blowing tracks? [more inside]
posted by Tarumba at 5:59 AM PST - 84 comments

please help me send recordings without it eating my day

Please help me send some recordings with no time wasted on my tinkering with my technology. [more inside]
posted by nantucket at 5:33 AM PST - 7 comments

Sci-fi clothing for the real world?

I am watching Star Trek: Discovery and: those are some fine-looking uniforms! Such a pretty blue, nice high collar, sparkly bits, unisex. I’ve been thinking how cool it would be if I could wear something kind of like a Star Fleet uniform? And yet, not look like I’m cosplaying, or in pajamas. [more inside]
posted by sacchan at 4:39 AM PST - 12 comments

What are the major talks you should give to a kid and when?

I'm looking for a guide for when to give those key life lessons talks to a kid. Obviously the sex talk is on the onset of puberty. But what about the rest of them? Bullying. Racism. Telling the truth. Did someone ever make a list of all of these and what ages you're supposed to dole out your wisdom for them? If not, help me make the comprehensive list.
posted by rileyray3000 at 3:32 AM PST - 41 comments

talk less, smile more

I talk a lot, especially when I'm feeling comfortable, happy or confident. What's the key to talking less? Mindfulness? What are some techniques you have used to help you just be quieter? [more inside]
posted by sockandawe at 3:17 AM PST - 8 comments

Wife not vaccinated for MMR. Vaccinate 2-month old baby?

My understanding is that infants are not routinely given the measles vaccine because maternal antibodies transferred by breastfeeding would neutralize the vaccine. But my wife grew up poor, neglected and likely unvaccinated, thus would not have any measles antibodies, right? Therefore should we seek to immediately vaccinate our newborn baby?
posted by wutangclan at 2:51 AM PST - 17 comments

February 18

Screenplay formatting of Subject, Action and Angle

I have Syd Field's "Screenplay" book, the bible of screenplays, but the formatting section is a little unclear to me. My confusion is about how to introduce the subject and angle of a shot (or when to specify the angle) and when to capitalize the name or subject (although this is more obvious to me when I understand the first part) [more inside]
posted by GospelofWesleyWillis at 10:36 PM PST - 8 comments

Why does my left arm hurt?

Okay, I’ve put this off for two months, but it’s really getting to me. Almost every time I sit in my office-type chair, my left arm either starts hurting (immediately and a lot) or gets a nasty pins-and-needles feeling, or both. [more inside]
posted by bryon at 9:49 PM PST - 18 comments

Hair colorist in SF?

The sheer cost inflation of everything in this city is making it impossible for me to figure this out... help? [more inside]
posted by stoneandstar at 9:16 PM PST - 8 comments

A link to the links

I'm finally working on my official writer website. I'm dreading tracking down all the links for things i've published in the last 15ish years. Are there shortcuts I can do without knowing anything about coding? Other ideas to get the links quickly? [more inside]
posted by mermaidcafe at 7:05 PM PST - 5 comments

Are all USB-C connections a bit wobbly?

I have 3 different USB-C devices that I plug in to my notebook PC. On all 3 of them, any tiny movement of the cable leads to the connection being dropped. So, for example, every time the USB-C hub cable is touched even lightly, all devices connected to the hub disconnect and then re-connect. So when using my notebook, I have to be extremely careful not to move it at any time. Is this normal? I've never had a similar problem with older USB or micro-USB connections on a range of devices.
posted by bakerybob at 6:18 PM PST - 14 comments

IVF Clinic in Toronto?

Hello! I am a 41 year old woman and my husband (42) and I have recently moved to Toronto. We do not have children. Can you please recommend a good IVF clinic in Toronto? How much should we expect to pay for the treatment? Is there something we need to consider before going for the treatment?We are both Canadian residents. Thank you for your help.
posted by synapse2512 at 4:52 PM PST - 10 comments

How do i handle my work friend?

Is my friendship with my co-worker toxic or have i just outgrown our friendship? [more inside]
posted by earthquakeglue at 4:44 PM PST - 15 comments

Should I take on a second job?

I was recently offered a second, part-time retail job. I'm having cold feet symptoms. [more inside]
posted by thoughtful_analyst at 2:47 PM PST - 26 comments

Help me find the bright metal tables I saw at a Thai restaurant

Help me find the bright metal tables I saw at a Thai restaurant [more inside]
posted by snownoid at 2:38 PM PST - 8 comments

Can a warming pad be put under house trees/plants during the winter?

Specifically for a Draceana Lisa plant. [more inside]
posted by fantasticness at 1:44 PM PST - 5 comments

Best portable device to view photos

I'm trying to figure out an easy, cheap way to show off some of my photographs, but I am so confused! More after the fold. [more inside]
posted by annieb at 12:25 PM PST - 9 comments

New Macbook Air stuck in setup

Hi folks. I have a new (refurb) 2017 Macbook Air, and I have literally just turned it on for the first time, and it is already borked in some way. Please help! [more inside]
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 11:58 AM PST - 8 comments

Fixating on death and the end of the universe

I read a sci fi story recently (Aspirate) that got me a bit too close to the absurd. It's turned into fixation and rumination. I want to move on and make the most of my time on Earth because what else can I do, but that's a tall order. I guess I should put this stuff in the extended explanation if it's a bit much for people to scroll past. [more inside]
posted by MuppetNavy at 10:32 AM PST - 20 comments

Help with a Swiss + et all Trip!

My wife has a work trip planned to Switzerland in early September. We can spend around a week there but she'll have two days for work in a small town in east Switzerland (Films) where it'll be difficult for me to stay (or super boring). Looking for places that one of us can hole up while other is working for those two days and for the other days where things might not be as expensive (so close by countries are an option). We'll probably need to fly in and out of Zurich. [more inside]
posted by sandmanwv at 10:08 AM PST - 5 comments

Looking for sliding scale talk therapy in Columbia, SC for a friend!

Can anyone recommend a strong talk therapist in Columbia, SC that is sliding scale? Has flexible hours, perhaps? [more inside]
posted by littleredwagon at 9:56 AM PST - 2 comments

Help someone early in their career get into programming and development

Wonder if any of you have tips for a young friend fairly early in her career looking into exploring a career in development and learning to code? [more inside]
posted by specialk420 at 9:24 AM PST - 8 comments

Website design 2019

I haven't done a website in about 10 years, and now I need one for certain projects. No budget to pay a pro, and my technical skills (or ability to update my skills as needed) are fine. What do I need to learn about what's in style for website design for what I'm doing (see below)? [more inside]
posted by twoplussix at 8:48 AM PST - 19 comments

Middle East related topic for high school assignment?

Asking for my teenager: Can you help my daughter come up with a subject for a large (>80 h) high school assignment? She's an ambitious and smart kid, and her special area of interest is the Middle East. [more inside]
posted by sively at 8:27 AM PST - 13 comments

Not Little Fuzzy, or is it?

I am vaguely remembering a paperback that was pretty worn already in the late seventies when I got my hands on it. It was about a friendly little hairy alien, like cousin It, but I dont think it was Little Fuzzy. Or was it? More vague details inside. [more inside]
posted by Iteki at 6:58 AM PST - 9 comments

"Easter Eggs" for a dollhouse

I am making a dollhouse for my future grandkids. I'd like to include some elements of surprise, whimsy & silliness. Ideas?
posted by i_mean_come_on_now at 6:57 AM PST - 28 comments

Nostril piercing 101

I’m interested in getting a very tiny stud in my nostril. I’ve had a bunch of ear piercings but that’s it. What should I know? (Am 40, dry skin, tendency toward nasal congestion, if that’s helpful.)
posted by chesty_a_arthur at 6:39 AM PST - 26 comments

Relationship councilling with my mother?

My mother wants to help me get over her parenting. How can I use this opportunity in healthy way for both of us? [more inside]
posted by Dwardles at 5:33 AM PST - 31 comments

How to get the best sound with consumer equipment into a PA?

We are providing a Spotify/iPod disco for a party at a hired venue, and I want it to sound as best as it can given that there is no budget for proper gear. Which parts of the chain, from initial audio through to connection to the PA, will benefit most from a bit of love? [more inside]
posted by Cantdosleepy at 5:07 AM PST - 3 comments

Advice on handling a miscarriage

We need advice on handling a miscarriage while my wife is a college student. [more inside]
posted by NoneOfTheAbove at 4:33 AM PST - 16 comments

Lives of the upper middle class and slightly famous

Especially when I'm stressed out, I love the Sunday Routine section in the New York Times, about how upper middle class New Yorkers spend their relaxation time. Can you recommend similar media to me? [more inside]
posted by 3491again at 3:57 AM PST - 8 comments

I want to improve the sound from my TV

I think I need to add a soundbar. Help me figure out how everything will connect (Roku, Blu-ray, Wii) and how much I should pay. [more inside]
posted by snarfois at 3:53 AM PST - 7 comments

Explain computer data storage/backup to me like I'm five

I'm a stressed out, overwhelmed grad student and not so great understanding the cloud, dropbox, time machine, etc. Demystify all this for me? [more inside]
posted by CancerSucks at 2:38 AM PST - 13 comments

I need some help getting started with "DIY" CPAP therapy for sleep apnea

Can anyone give me any advice for getting started with DIY CPAP therapy for sleep apnea? For reasons explained within, I won't be getting this equipment through an insurance company or a Sleep Center, though I will have competent and willing medical supervision available. [more inside]
posted by Corvid at 2:27 AM PST - 11 comments

Ready for Action!

Theoretically how many "Useful" things could you conceal about your person and still look normal, or mostly normal. I'm thinking about things like paracord bracelets or belts so you have rope. Lockpicks or multitools as a wallet card. A battery pack in a pocket or sewn into a jacket lining. A Compass in a shoe? [more inside]
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 2:17 AM PST - 16 comments

February 17

Help an overweight androgynous woman dress to impress!

I will be having more occasions at which I need to dress more formally (maybe at two different levels of formality above blue jeans). I am mainly looking for recommendations about pants. But I am also open to suggestions about tops, blazers and shoes. I am also open to thoughts on accessories that aren’t too femme. [more inside]
posted by maurreen at 10:49 PM PST - 18 comments

Fantasy novel with female protagonist, British university setting?

Themes of alchemy, time travel by body-hopping, eventually going all the way to the beginning of time, the paperback had black edges, which was what made me buy it in the airport bookshop... but I don't remember the title or the author, can you help? Bought in the last 10 years or so.
posted by holist at 10:16 PM PST - 8 comments

Braces at 6 or 7?

(you were not my orthodontist) but does it sound normal to get braces in the first grade and then have them for 6 years? (so from 7ish to 13?) I remember I also briefly had a palate expander & and they eventually had to pull 2 adult bicuspids so the rest of the teeth fit (so overcrowding WAS an issue), but it seems like a loooong time to have them.
posted by Geameade at 8:30 PM PST - 10 comments

App for mapping video game backgrounds from screen recording?

I heard of software that builds maps of video game worlds/levels by piecing together background images as they appear on the screen. The idea being that you could play through something like Castlevania with the software running and end up with a large, single image of the entire level (or as much of the level that appeared on-screen during play). Any idea what software this is? My googling is fruitless. [more inside]
posted by hjo3 at 8:22 PM PST - 3 comments

Unkillable FB notifications on Mac

How do I destroy (with extreme prejudice) FB notifications on a Macbook Air, when the notification centre is throwing up its hands and telling me they’re already dead?? [more inside]
posted by chappell, ambrose at 7:33 PM PST - 8 comments

What motivates people?

What motivates people to do anything at all, beyond the necessities of life like eating, drinking, and sleeping? Why does a person read a book, or paint a picture, or call a friend, or buy something on an infomercial, or go to a protest? I'm interested in a very broad perspective on this question, so anything from personal anecdotes, to self-help books, to studies on the effectiveness of advertising, and to treatises on propaganda are all welcome answers.
posted by J.K. Seazer at 7:17 PM PST - 29 comments

How do I restore this antique wire laundry basket?

My wife acquired this antique collapsible wire laundry basket years ago (pictured folded since it's a pain to open and close now). We finally have the space to use it as a display piece and I'd like to clean it up for her birthday this spring. It's in solid shape with just a few rust spots, but it's dirty and needs TLC. I'm starting from zero with furniture restoration but I'm ready to learn and I'm having a hard time googling a solution here. Is this just a matter of steel wool on the metal and some oil in the joints? Or should I use some kind of metal/rust cleaner? Any advice is much appreciated!
posted by Banky_Edwards at 7:13 PM PST - 8 comments

Seriously though, what do you expect from a junior data scientist/dev?

I'm a PhD student pivoting out of academia, I have a bit of personal programming experience, and I have about 6 weeks left of a data science bootcamp. I've learned a lot, I've been Pythoning my butt off, and I'm starting to think about job interviews and how to prepare for them. The problem: the internet is rife with conflicting advice. If you've hired a junior or have been hired as one, HELP ME PLEASE!! (Note: While I'm primarily focused on data science, I'd be happy to do junior dev work too). [more inside]
posted by thebots at 6:57 PM PST - 5 comments

Should I change my toilet?

My guest bath's toilet, which we use infrequently, keeps getting clogged. Two different plumbers have found no obstruction, and are flummoxed. What can we do? [more inside]
posted by redlines at 6:16 PM PST - 21 comments

Philanthropic Organizations To Target For Sponsorship of TED-like Event

We are in the process of looking for financial sponsorship for upcoming (and awesome) Buckminster Fuller themed event. The event will emphasize Fuller's ongoing influence in science, architectural design, engineering and art. What general philanthropic organizations/businesses can we target for financial sponsorship. To all Los Angeles Me-fites, specific possibilities would be appreciated
posted by goalyeehah at 4:51 PM PST - 1 comment

Can you help me lay these mousetraps?

To deal with mice in my kitchen I am using traditional wooden snap traps (expensive plastic ones have been ineffective). I have caught a few mice that way. But very often the traps are either (i) so sensitive that I can hardly set them and they go off on their own; or (ii) so insensitive once I have set them that a mouse comes and eats the bait and the trap doesn't go off. The brand is Little Nipper. This may be hard to explain, but perhaps you have some ideas about what I am doing wrong?
posted by EtTuHealy at 2:50 PM PST - 17 comments

Let's shed some light on the situation

It dawns on me (ha) that I have somehow become so afraid of putting too-high wattage bulbs in lamp sockets that my house is.... dim. Am I being silly? [more inside]
posted by nkknkk at 2:31 PM PST - 29 comments

Cool t-shirts from non white musicians/bands?

About 6 months ago I started wearing only jeans + cool band tshirts, mostly from bands/artists you've never heard of; mostly local or regional. A lot of southerny stuff, newgrass, etc. Old 97's, Jason Isbell, War and Treaty, Blind Pilots, She Returns From War, Great Peacock. They're almost all white! Can you suggest cool tshirts from talented, non white artists/bands? Understated, graphic, dark colors? Regional (SE) preferred?
posted by ftm at 1:50 PM PST - 11 comments

How do you tell someone you want to give them money?

We are in a financial position to give my in-laws a cushion that would make their lives infinitely easier. We want to do this happily because we love them with absolutely no strings attached. But how do you tell someone this? [more inside]
posted by to sir with millipedes at 12:44 PM PST - 22 comments

Choosing a meal replacement

I'm interested in trying out one of the various solid or liquid meal replacements out there (Soylent, Meal Squares, Ensure, etc etc etc) — not for weight loss or weight gain, and not to replace my whole diet with, but because I have Sensory Issues that come out when I'm overtired or overhungry and make real food difficult. How do I decide which is right for me? Is there some trustworthy comparison of the pros and cons of each that I can use to narrow down the field? Barring that, what should I know? What should I consider?
posted by nebulawindphone at 12:05 PM PST - 10 comments

Books about improving self-esteem

I’m looking for recommendations for books or workbooks that focus specifically on how to increase confidence and self-esteem? Information about overcoming imposter syndrome is also welcome.
posted by mkuhnell at 11:41 AM PST - 8 comments

Suggestions for books on what it's like to work in a biology lab?

Hi there, I'm interested in learning what it's like to work in a biology lab as a scientist (researcher/postdoc/PI - whatever). I steered away from the sciences as an undergrad so I don't really know much about the process and what scientists DO. I'd like to find some books/narratives that would help me learn what actually happens in a biology lab. For instance, I think I know what pipetting is. [more inside]
posted by mulkey at 11:29 AM PST - 11 comments

Cover Letter Paragraph Critique

Hi friends, I'm on the hunt for helpful critique of a section of my cover letter, which I've revisited several times. (I WILL get it right!). [more inside]
posted by shelle at 10:45 AM PST - 13 comments

Looking for denim jeans that will hold my iPhone safely

I usually wear Levi 505 jeans and like them but the rear pocket where I store my iPhone 6 is barely deep enough to hold the phone. It frequently starts to work its way out of the pocket. Looking for better solution. [more inside]
posted by Rad_Boy at 9:39 AM PST - 7 comments

Swift 4 beginner books for a specific coding project?

I'm trying to code a local/offline word processor in Swift 4 that basically works like writtenkitten--every 100 words you type, the app rewards you with a new kitten pic. I'm having trouble with the code and would like to understand Swift/Xcode better, and I'm not sure which of the pricey Swift 4 books would be a good investment. Which should I pick up? Snowflakes follow. [more inside]
posted by yhlee at 9:27 AM PST - 5 comments

Another Shark Game Question...

So I’ve been playing the addictive incremental Shark Game (previously, previously, previously) for…a bit. Do you have any favorite personal side-quest kinds of things? [more inside]
posted by Charity Garfein at 7:48 AM PST - 2 comments

Relaxing by watching other people work

I really dig watching, and learning about, obscure handcrafts and industries from days of yore. In fact, I think I want to spend much of this lazy Sunday watching such things on YouTube. Got any to recommend? (Inspired by today's FPP about bell tuning.) [more inside]
posted by escape from the potato planet at 6:48 AM PST - 31 comments

Books on more innovative and insightful thinking?

I’m looking for books or resources which discuss the origins of innovative thinking. [more inside]
posted by jacobean at 6:21 AM PST - 6 comments

Historical Political Philosophy Tube

Help me find historical/political/philosophical documentaries online [more inside]
posted by greytape at 5:44 AM PST - 3 comments

Gorky Park the novel: what do Russians think of it?

Nearly 40 years after seeing the reviews and thinking I'd read it some day, I've finally finished Gorky Park. I have some questions, the chief among them being, if you're Russian and lived through the time period in question, does it still seem to be a fantastic novel or is it full of jarring implausibilities? More questions below the fold and spoilers of course. [more inside]
posted by glasseyes at 4:18 AM PST - 7 comments

Bugs from dog food now in house – what are they? How to eradicate?

A few weeks ago, these little guys popped out of a bag of imported dog food in larval form – they kind of looked like these at the time, but without the coloration on the head or tail. They can't be much more than a centimeter long. What could they be and how can I destroy them? [more inside]
posted by a series of tube socks at 1:10 AM PST - 5 comments

I Need a Salad Cookbook

My idea of salad is lettuce leaves, tomato and carrot which is boring and not very filling. Please help me find a salad cookbook. [more inside]
posted by poxandplague at 12:44 AM PST - 15 comments

February 16

Can I use a Froyo device in 2019?

I can’t stop looking at my smartphone. So I was thinking of getting a less-smart phone. I want something that can competently text and also call a Lyft and found this ancient Froyo Android. Will I be able to get Lyft onto a device this old? And will it be a security hazard somehow? Details inside. [more inside]
posted by sockkitude at 6:19 PM PST - 11 comments

Neck muscles tense when talking

Is this normal? [more inside]
posted by Crookshanks_Meow at 6:18 PM PST - 3 comments

seeking advice regarding investing - currently have a fee-based account

I inherited what was to me a lot of money at the age of 16. The money was invested on my behalf in a mix of stocks and bonds in PlanMember Securities, a fee-based system wherein I was paired with a (shitty) advisor.Is there someone I can pay for a consultation that wouldn't have anything to do with my money? Figuring out fund-allocation stuff on my own seems pretty daunting, with a heightened possibility of making some kind of mistake. Juicy financial details inside. [more inside]
posted by lilies.lilies at 6:10 PM PST - 14 comments

Credit Cards 101, Australia Edition

Teach me about responsible use of credit cards, as they apply to Australia! [more inside]
posted by divabat at 4:38 PM PST - 6 comments

Tips for coping with total hysterectomy and/or chemotherapy

So my girl-guts have totally gone and some lovely nurse is feeding chemo drugs into my system every three weeks. New experiences! I'm managing really well so far but I wonder what tips others may have for issues I may encounter in the near and distant future. [more inside]
posted by Thella at 4:25 PM PST - 9 comments

Anyone know where my towel bars came from?

I'd like to add more towel bars to a bathroom in my condo, and ideally the new towel bars would match the existing ones. But I don't know where the existing towel bars came from (or if that type exists anymore) - the existing ones presumably come from the previous remodeling of my bathrooms, which was a few years ago and before I bought the place. Does anyone recognize these and can tell me what they are? See links for pics. Some dimensions: the bars are 3/4" diameter, and the escutcheons are 2" diameter. Pic 1 Pic 2
posted by Mechitar at 3:57 PM PST - 2 comments

What's the reject rate for injection needles?

People who have to stick other people with needles for Medical Reasons, and especially people who have to stick themselves with needles, how often do you get a needle that just doesn't go in like normal? [more inside]
posted by tee-man at 3:10 PM PST - 17 comments

Illness, anxiety, counselling, oh my.

This was us before Xmas. Things appeared to be settling down nicely until this last week, when Mr MMDP had something of a setback and I had something of a meltdown. I am a mess and can't help him until I help myself. But I don't know what sort of help I need. What does AskMefi suggest? [more inside]
posted by Martha My Dear Prudence at 3:10 PM PST - 8 comments

Ergonomic drafting/lab chair

I'm looking for an ergonomic chair to use at my 3' tall electronics workbench. If there was an Aeron model that tall there wouldn't be a question, but no such luck. [more inside]
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 2:11 PM PST - 4 comments

My girlfriend is super cheap and I don't know how to deal with it

My girlfriend is super cheap and I don't know how to deal with it. [more inside]
posted by kbbbo at 12:44 PM PST - 54 comments

The Prydain Chronicles with a female lead

Where's that epic multi-book coming of age story for 8-9 year old girls? [more inside]
posted by Winnie the Proust at 12:24 PM PST - 28 comments

Can a bank refuse ACH payments?

Someone has claimed that their business bank account does not allow ACH transactions for "fraud prevention." I am not familiar with any banking institution in the U.S. that prevents usage of this basic feature. Am I missing something?
posted by ticktickatick at 12:21 PM PST - 5 comments

Explain facials

I have a gift certificate for a "hydrating facial". I have no idea what a facial is. Insight and advice is solicited. I'm old; do no skin care or makeup. Before I make a call to them (not any website available for review) how do I navigate this unknown world?
posted by mightshould at 11:28 AM PST - 8 comments

I need an enamel pin hero

I need to find someone with experience designing enamel pins and I need to do it fast and I have absolutely no idea how. [more inside]
posted by bleep at 11:03 AM PST - 18 comments

Let's go hunting!

How do I work with a headhunter? [more inside]
posted by Toddles at 9:18 AM PST - 5 comments

Building an individual basketball player development program

Where can I find good practice routines/drills for developing individual basketball fundamental skills? e.g. dribbling, layups, passing, etc. All around game improvement is the goal to help improve enough to make varsity next fall. I'd like to build a practice schedule that can be done daily with metrics to track improvement. Something that can be done at home (in a driveway with hoop on garage) by yourself. Online mentors/coaching? Also, where can I get more information about improving the 'head game' part? Outwitting opponents, strategies, tactics, etc. Books, videos? Thank you
posted by GernBlandston at 9:08 AM PST - 4 comments

Where does this music come from? Not an earworm!

Asking for a family member, a healthy musician and stonemason in his forties who does not drink or smoke. He and his family live in a rural area with minimal traffic. "I often wake up with an original piece of music in my head, most commonly in the form of a looping bassline. This happens both in mornings and after naps. Sometimes the music comes with a melody or even lyrics layered over the rhythm. Does this happen to anyone else out there? Any insights into possible biological explanations of the phenomenon?" [more inside]
posted by mareli at 8:38 AM PST - 18 comments

Chic but conservative clothing for the Middle East

Hi, all-- I'm going on a 3-week trip to the Middle East--Jordan, the West Bank, and Saudi Arabia--and I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR. [more inside]
posted by namemeansgazelle at 8:29 AM PST - 15 comments

How to have good boundries with younger friends

Mid-30s man making friends with people who are in their early 20s. I'd like to do this right, and build healthy friendships, while also being mindful of the power difference, experience difference, and maturity difference. [more inside]
posted by rebent at 7:56 AM PST - 21 comments

Can I be racist for a minute?

I heard my coworker say this and then follow up with a comment. I’m uncomfortable. But should I say anything? [more inside]
posted by socky bottoms at 7:12 AM PST - 27 comments

Give my brain some chores.

Hello, I’m stuck at a tradeshow for the next 4 days, repeating the same thing over and over to people that stop by the booth. Normally when I’m doing something like this I think about all the things I have to do make plans for the future which in turn ramps up my anxiety. I’m looking for fun thought exercises or some things to mull over that will be beneficial to me in some way. Additionally , I’m curious how others function in similar scenarios, what does your brain do when it’s active but your body is stuck in one place?
posted by vividvoltage at 5:51 AM PST - 16 comments

February 15

Should I take the job? The "both jobs are awesome, though" edition.

I have the opportunity to take on a new and exciting role, but my current gig is pretty ok. How can I weigh the pros and cons of each to make the right choice? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 11:38 PM PST - 5 comments

How is being married different from not being married?

I'm in a happy, committed relationship where marriage is on the table but not a huge priority for either of us. I'm wondering how marriage makes life different, in ways that I may not have thought of. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 11:38 PM PST - 43 comments

How to friend after a crush?

I made this great friend last year. Long story short, he developed a crush on me, which led to me developing a crush on him. It was all very stupid, because I'm a happily married woman. He eventually let the cat out of the bag to see if I was interested in...um...more than friendship, but I did the right thing and broke his heart. Sigh. Now what? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 11:38 PM PST - 18 comments

Political/history books for an ex philosophy major

I come from a background, though removed by many years, of studying philosophy and political science with an affinity to critical social theory, but comparatively speaking I have a lack of historical perspective regarding the consequences of laissez faire capitalism, labor movements, neoliberalism, globalization, colonialization/hegemony, etc. and the public policy responses that have and have not worked in response to those dilemmas [more inside]
posted by galennaklar at 10:21 PM PST - 6 comments

Schmaltzy, slow-motion over-romanticized TV commercials, pre-1984

Good evening Meta-folks, I am still writing my story which takes place in 1984. I want to use a simile or metaphor by comparing an incident in my story to one of those many schmaltzy, trite, over-romanticized TV commercials featuring a man and a woman running toward each other——in slow motion——on the beach, with zealous smiles, water splashing and it all ending with the woman making a glorious leap into the man’s arms. I have two questions. First what product(s) were these commercials for and secondly, did any of these commercials take place BEFORE 1984? Thank you for any help you might be able to provide.
posted by Ira Weston at 6:42 PM PST - 14 comments

Stumped with a specific tax form wording for a state credit. Needs ELI5.

Yes, YANML, but I got a simple question for a state rental/homeowners credit tax form that I'm completely having a hard time understanding (one section). [more inside]
posted by dubious_dude at 5:41 PM PST - 12 comments

Text manipulation - inserting one list into another

I want to insert one text list (of 6-letter plant codes) into another text list, and am getting know-where and confused. [more inside]
posted by unearthed at 5:26 PM PST - 20 comments

Mirror, mirror on a screen

I have one primary TV in my living room that I use to watch streaming services, with no cable subscription. I would like to be able to mirror whatever I'm currently watching on that TV to a smaller screen in the kitchen so I can fetch snacks or wander off to do small chores without having to pause my show. [more inside]
posted by drlith at 4:57 PM PST - 3 comments

Use of italics.

I have a basic understanding of when to use italics and quotation marks. But I haven't found anything that says if they need to be used beyond the first reference. It seems they would wear a reader out if they're used continuously for repeating proper nouns that have already employed them once. Are they used at each instance or only at the first and are unnecessary for subsequent ones?
posted by CollectiveMind at 4:25 PM PST - 11 comments

What is "Strasserism"?

I've seen some references to "strasserism" recently. Can you explain what it is, or provide some historical or modern examples?
posted by the man of twists and turns at 4:07 PM PST - 2 comments

Mixed-orientation marriages where both parties are gay & happy?

Usual depictions of mixed-orientation marriages tend to involve a closeted gay partner and a not-very-willing straight spouse (often a gay man & a straight woman, though sometimes the reverse happens), or a lesbian and a gay man in a marriage of convenience to appease family/cultural expectations. Are there examples where both parties are willing and happy with the relationship? I'm especially interested in a lesbian & gay man happily married to each other (doesn't have to be monogamous), but gay & straight are OK too.
posted by divabat at 3:59 PM PST - 10 comments

Will having political bumper stickers on my vehicle jeopardize my job?

Now that I have my OWN vehicle - not a 'family' car I share with my wife - I was thinking of making it my own with bumper stickers, but I am concerned that they might jeopardize my job. [more inside]
posted by 8LeggedFriend at 3:44 PM PST - 16 comments

Things to do in Madeira

I'm in Madeira for the next two days (Saturday and Sunday) with a hire car and a desire to do something. What can you all suggest?
posted by sodium lights the horizon at 3:39 PM PST - 4 comments

The Rich Wives Club

Looking for suggestions of books/movies/articles where the female half of a heterosexual partnership is the primary breadwinner. It can be a plot point or an aside, but the relationship must be overall positive.
posted by ohsnapdragon at 3:29 PM PST - 15 comments

Should I keep trying to have more communication with partner?

I've been with my partner about 9 months.. We see each other once a week, stay overnight then often spend the day together. When we're together, I really enjoy his company, he's interesting, kind, funny and thoughtful. In between, he doesn't like to speak on the phone or text or whatsapp. He emails every day, and I reply. Emailing alone doesn't really work for me. My main question is: Is it worth persevering? Tried to speak about it a few times but nothing really changed. [more inside]
posted by blue_eyes at 3:00 PM PST - 21 comments

How to play songs from phones through Android car stereo?

Today my husband installed a new 'Xtrons Android 7.1' car stereo, which he bought on ebay, in his car. The stereo came with a user manual, but it's very short on actual instructions. The stereo plays radio stations ok. It is mostly ignoring our phones. [more inside]
posted by tulipwool at 2:56 PM PST - 4 comments

Sending something for news of sickness

One of my relatives just got diagnosed with leukemia. I want to do something for the family but I'm not sure what. Ideas? [more inside]
posted by crunchy potato at 2:42 PM PST - 11 comments

Would you rather...

I’ll be celebrating a “milestone” birthday over the summer and I’m having trouble deciding between two celebration options. Help me make a decision. [more inside]
posted by teamnap at 1:28 PM PST - 22 comments

Live chat book club

I am looking for an online book club that has scheduled chatroom (or other versions of live chat) discussions. I want the discussion/chat of an in-person book club, but with the convenience of not leaving the comforts of home. Does such a thing exist, or is this one of those "be the change" things? [more inside]
posted by Fig at 12:57 PM PST - 5 comments

Arabic Alphabet Chart?

Hello, I'm looking for the Arabic equivalent for something like "A is for Apple, B is for Ball..." etc. while i have seen things like this image, it would help to see the names of these creatures in transliterated english as well
posted by beshtya at 12:16 PM PST - 2 comments

How do I paint a pattern on a section of cinder block fence?

I have an unpainted cinder block (CMU) fence in my backyard. One section has some graffiti from the previous owner's kids. I want to paint over it and then attempt to overlay a geometric design. I am a painting novice. How do I do this? [more inside]
posted by mullacc at 11:26 AM PST - 4 comments

Excluding a site from google search results

Is there a permanent, global way to exclude a site from my google search results? [more inside]
posted by peeedro at 11:03 AM PST - 11 comments

She drinks a matcha drink, she drinks a vodka drink

I love matcha but first thing in the morning I want my drinks sweet (otherwise why get out of bed... ?). Looking for warm matcha beverage recipes for morning. [more inside]
posted by stoneandstar at 11:03 AM PST - 7 comments

Edinburgh and surrounds - where do the young families live?

We used to live in Edinburgh and are considering moving back. Where should we be looking? Details inside! [more inside]
posted by cpatterson at 10:08 AM PST - 7 comments

Marry fox, throw grain in water, feed HDMI cable to goose

I have a DVD player that has one of those RCA triple plugs. I want to connect it to a Smartboard that has an HDMI and a USB. We can ONLY play movies from a DVD, but we DON'T have a computer with a DVD drive. How do I make the movie appear on the Smartboard?
posted by blnkfrnk at 10:02 AM PST - 10 comments

Coffee and spice delivery with good variety

I live in an area where I can't buy good, whole bean coffee conveniently so I have it delivered. I enjoy constant variety so I'm looking for a subscription service that will send me different coffees. I've identified a few and am seeing if anyone has personal experience with them (or any that I've missed). On a similar note, if anyone has experience with spice subscription services, I'm also looking for experiences with them. [more inside]
posted by Candleman at 9:12 AM PST - 9 comments

Help me ship (semi-) fine art!

I'm about to start selling watercolors and pen-and-ink art on Etsy. But I realized that I don't know the best way to ship the stuff. Do you have any experience, advice, or suggestions? [more inside]
posted by the phlegmatic king at 8:46 AM PST - 8 comments

What's good about the bad bits?

I will be compromising on career and commuting options in order to lead a potentially saner life away from the big city. I thought I was ok with this until sh*t got real. How do I frame these changes in a way that helps rather than hinders the transition? [more inside]
posted by socksister at 7:44 AM PST - 19 comments

A mantra for dealing with difficult people

What it says on the tin. I have a manager who lets her personal issues get in the way of treating her subordinates with fairness and respect. I need a short mantra to save my sanity and get through the days. [more inside]
posted by onecircleaday at 7:07 AM PST - 31 comments

Help me find an energy-shot unicorn: No artificial sweetener OR stevia.

I'm trying to find a morning pick-me-up for someone whose gastrointestinal disease means coffee and zero-calorie sweeteners, whether artificial (sucralose and its ilk) or natural (Stevia) are Very Bad News™. [more inside]
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 6:32 AM PST - 20 comments

Drinking the Kool-Aid

I, an intractable mule with a deep antipathy for management-speak, have been appointed to a very large cross-organization working group on a new HR initiative. Help me develop a taste for the Kool-Aid. [more inside]
posted by Admiral Haddock at 6:08 AM PST - 21 comments

February 14

Jack of all writing site?

I want to know about any websites that help with creative writing, blogging, community feedback, and delving into paid freelance work. In other words, a Swiss army knife of writing. [more inside]
posted by zardoz at 8:18 PM PST - 5 comments

Old school gaming: coop multiplayer LAN

So I realise this is an incredibly dated question. I have a friend that I game with over a LAN. We play cooperative games like Civ. However (gasp) I am getting bored with Civ. What else is there? [more inside]
posted by Athanassiel at 7:36 PM PST - 11 comments

Preserved lemon newb (vegetarian edition)

I have a jar of preserved lemons and I'm vegetarian, so what dinner is in my future? What is their flavor? How long does an open jar keep?
posted by Jason and Laszlo at 6:53 PM PST - 9 comments

Why are companies so eager for you to use their app?

Why do companies try so hard to get you to use their app instead of their mobile website? E.g. Reddit, Yelp. Detailed responses and industry experience welcome... [more inside]
posted by Joey Buttafoucault at 5:26 PM PST - 34 comments

The car is dead. Long live the car.

My 2002 Hyundai Santa Fe just died. It starts but isn't drivable -- I think the transmission is shot. It's in good condition, no damage and newish tires (sob). I'd like to sell it for scrap, but I've never done that before. Can anyone recommend a reputable place to sell it to in Oakland, CA? Is there anything I need to know about this process other than handing over the keys and title? Thank you Hivemind!
posted by ananci at 5:07 PM PST - 6 comments

Done. Repeat. Done. Repeat.

Help me come up with interesting and creative ways to say "This is done". [more inside]
posted by downtohisturtles at 4:34 PM PST - 65 comments

Word vs. outlines

I'm having some difficulty generating a table of contents in Word 2016 for the PC... [more inside]
posted by praemunire at 4:14 PM PST - 5 comments

seeking a whistleblower attorney in Nevada

Hi - I have a friend who is a medical professional and needs to report a former employer for various malpractice, but needs to not lose their career. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 4:13 PM PST - 4 comments

Professor X

What are the downsides to having a non-binary gender indicator on one's driver's license? [more inside]
posted by momus_window at 2:29 PM PST - 15 comments

Are we being uploaded?

I am looking for references in science fiction - or anywhere else - about the possibility that we are being uploaded. [more inside]
posted by bru at 2:03 PM PST - 16 comments

Should I delay my London UK trip because of Brexit?

I was thinking of spending a couple of weeks in London in May. I've been following the Brexit news in a superficial way but I don't have a good feel for what is likely to be the impact on travellers from North America. What's the worse case scenario? What's the likeliest scenario? What kind of disruptions would be reasonable to expect? I haven't booked my flight or AirBnb yet but will probably need to soon.
posted by storybored at 1:34 PM PST - 6 comments

What are the most awkward parts of your job, and how do you handle them?

What expected or unexpected things are awkward for you at work, in a human-interaction cringeworthy sense? How do you deal with them? Have you gotten better? [more inside]
posted by amicamentis at 1:12 PM PST - 33 comments

Earbuds with tips that don’t fall off easily?

Looking for suggestions of wired earbuds (<$150) that have the option to use different size rubber or foam tips, but where those tips will actually stay on the earbuds and not fall off easily. [more inside]
posted by valleys at 11:51 AM PST - 19 comments

Yet Another Career/Life Question

I'm frustrated with my job options and not sure where to go from here. Advice? [more inside]
posted by Penguin48 at 10:26 AM PST - 8 comments

Am I Job Searching The Right Way? (Unemployment Anxiety)

Do you have any feedback on my plan to find a job? I was pretty confident about my plan, but it's been a few months now and I'm getting a little nervous. [more inside]
posted by bbqturtle at 10:18 AM PST - 15 comments

eat an apple every day / go to bed by three

I'm looking for songs about taking care of yourself. [more inside]
posted by iximox at 9:56 AM PST - 30 comments

PDX Couples Counseling, 2019 edition

My partner and I are looking for a lesbian-friendly couples counselor in Portland, OR. Geographically, it would be best if they were west of the Willamette and north of Cornell. Beaverton would work too. Previous questions on this topic are from 2012 and 2011, so perhaps there are some new recommendations out there :).
posted by elmay at 8:36 AM PST - 2 comments

Recommend blogs about apartment renovations, esp with little video

My life is a giant mass of stress. One thing that soothes me is looking at apartment renovations - good, bad or indifferent; cheap or reach-for-the-guillotine. Where do I find them? [more inside]
posted by Frowner at 8:34 AM PST - 8 comments

I like warm butts and I cannot lie

After living in Minnesota for 8 years, I've decided it's time to get serious about keeping my butt warm. What are my options? [more inside]
posted by rada at 7:51 AM PST - 27 comments

swaying in back of head in sync with heartbeat. any idea what is this?

I have swaying in back of head that seems to be in sync with heartbeat. My blood pressure is tested and it is fine. I have RA factor 17 (slightly on higher side). can that cause this?. I sometimes feel dizzy when walking.
posted by bharath at 5:52 AM PST - 6 comments

why does my eyeliner keep getting messed up??

For years and years, I have been wearing winged eyeliner on a daily basis. Now suddenly, it won't stay put and keeps smearing everywhere. I haven't changed my technique or the brand of eyeliner that I use. What gives?? [more inside]
posted by unicorn chaser at 4:46 AM PST - 8 comments

Looking to buy a print magazine in the GTA

I feel deeply stupid asking this question, but here we go. [more inside]
posted by janepanic at 3:17 AM PST - 12 comments

February 13

Tongue in cheek songs about historical topics

Yesterday, clavicle recommended this song - The Mesopotamians by TMBG. It‘s my new favourite song (thanks clavicle!). I love songs that poke fun at historical topics and then squeeze relevant words/dates etc. into the lyrics. I also love the Monty Python song „Oliver Cromwell“. Do you have other recommendations? Thanks!
posted by Omnomnom at 11:21 PM PST - 50 comments

Books about Engineering

I'm looking for recommendations on nonfiction books about engineering; specifically, a group of people coming together to build something that has never been built before. Or multiple groups of people in competition to do so. [more inside]
posted by condour75 at 7:38 PM PST - 36 comments

Shoe for Dinosaur size 53 please

I am looking for a source that has dinosaur feet size. [more inside]
posted by aetg at 6:33 PM PST - 2 comments

Where to go for Vegetarian V-Day dinner near the NYC Public Library?

Can you recommend a vegetarian friendly restaurant near the New York Public Library (Bryant Park) for a Valentine's Day dinner? It's fine if the restaurant is omnivore as long as they have some good items without meat. No other food restrictions.
posted by andoatnp at 5:13 PM PST - 6 comments

Real estate websites / public transit

Are there any real estate sites, a la Zillow, that allow you to filter listings by proximity to public transit? [more inside]
posted by lewedswiver at 2:50 PM PST - 2 comments

Minneapolis in June with 9 month old?

I'm going to a conference in Minneapolis this summer and will be taking my spouse and 9 month old. Where is the best place to stay? [more inside]
posted by stripesandplaid at 2:00 PM PST - 6 comments

The Mysteries of the Human Body

Help me gain a better understanding of how my body works! [more inside]
posted by samthemander at 12:52 PM PST - 14 comments

Son switching from SSI to SSDI?

My young adult son with Aspergers has been collecting SSI since he was 17. He is now a full-time junior in college and not working at the moment. He has worked a few jobs in the last couple of years, making minimum wage. His father just became eligible for Disability, and we were told my son is now eligible to the equivalent of half his father's benefits. [more inside]
posted by primate moon at 12:51 PM PST - 4 comments

"Then the man he steps right up to the microphone..."

Hi MeFites! This may be a no-brainer question, but can anyone help me identify songs about fictional bands/singers in the vein of:
  • "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band" - The Beatles
  • "Sultans of Swing" - Dire Straits
  • "Benny and the Jets" - Elton John
Looking forward to the suggestions; I plan on making a playlist for an upcoming trip. Thank you!
posted by theseventhstranger at 11:53 AM PST - 80 comments

Insurance fuckery and deadlines: please help.

The GAP insurance on my car sent me 'A deadline is approaching' mail, but they never stated the actual deadline on the mail, just 'refer to your contract'. Now they're saying it's expired so they won't pay. What are my options? [more inside]
posted by corb at 11:50 AM PST - 11 comments

Help me plan a Tea Party for my nieces!

I am going to host a tea party for my twin nieces, who are turning five. Help me make it special! [more inside]
posted by just_ducky at 11:36 AM PST - 25 comments

Pain After Root Canal Filling - Is there a nerve trapped??

Had a root canal done 2 weeks ago in a molar due to extensive pain. X-ray done didn't reveal anything but was told that due to periodontal disease there could be exposed nerves and so a root canal was done. During the 2 weeks I didn't feel any pain. Then I went to have the tooth filled permanently. Now I have pain in the tooth and stabbing pains in my eye. There's more. [more inside]
posted by watercarrier at 11:16 AM PST - 7 comments

What tools do MeFi web devs use for large-ish projects?

Hi ALl, I have a new job fixing front-end web accessibility for a large-ish project, with several components spread across a big directory structure. Yay! It's a mix of PHP templates, javascript, CSS< and a couple other languages I'm less concerned with. [more inside]
posted by Alensin at 10:52 AM PST - 11 comments

They discontinued my pants! Please help me find new ones.

For a few glorious years I could buy two models of pants from Uniqlo - their ultra stretch skinny chino, and their stretch skinny-fit color jeans. But they've discontinued them both, and their replacement chino and jean models just don't do it for me. [more inside]
posted by entropone at 9:56 AM PST - 10 comments

Finding a poly-friendly therapist in NYC

My partner and I are looking for a great therapist in NYC who can help us talk about, and think through, a possible shift to polyamory. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 9:55 AM PST - 6 comments

Has the tentative border security deal been presented to Congress?

Has the tentative border security deal (reference) been presented as legislation to the House of Representatives? If not, are we doomed to another shutdown due to the 72-hour rule or is the House able to waive the rule?
posted by saeculorum at 9:40 AM PST - 1 comment

I would like the cutest low-heeled shoes or flats please and thank you.

I got a cool new job that affords me some fashion flexibility. One aspect of it is that I sometimes have to walk across downtown to appear in public with not a lot of notice looking professional. [more inside]
posted by *s at 9:06 AM PST - 17 comments

Rectangle seeks legwear

Tall, skinny, thoroughly assless woman seeks leggings and pants that won't slither down and fall off. [more inside]
posted by nebulawindphone at 8:47 AM PST - 12 comments

HSA contribution limit for a doubly insured non-dependent dependent?

US-tax-filter: which HSA contribution limit applies to a single adult who is doubly insured by individual and family HDHPs? [more inside]
posted by mosst at 7:39 AM PST - 1 comment

Have I already read Revelation Space by Alastair Reynolds?

I recently picked up the novel Revelation Space by Alastair Reynolds. I've only just started reading it, but I'm getting déjà vu. If I look up the plot for Revelation Space to check and I'm wrong, I'll have spoiled the book. So if I tell you about the book I think it might be, could somebody who's already read it please tell me if I'm right or not? SPOILER WARNING [more inside]
posted by Lorc at 7:29 AM PST - 10 comments

What's this theme song?

I'm trying to identify a TV show with haunting intro theme music that included some whistling. If I remember right, the music sounded vaguely Celtic. The TV show is contemporary or contemporaryish (after 2010), and available on either Netflix Canada or Amazon Prime.
posted by thisclickableme at 6:42 AM PST - 24 comments

Can I eat this? Boiled chicken edition

Actually, I was going to ask if I could eat boiled chicken breast left out overnight for 7 hours, but simple searching pointed me here, so I'll just toss it. However, the comments made me really wonder... Every day I bring in various sealed foods, which I just leave sit on my desk from when I take it out of the fridge, to when I eat it, always at least 4.5 hours later, but sometimes 6 or 7 hours later. [more inside]
posted by Pig Tail Orchestra at 4:20 AM PST - 27 comments

Where is the "logical" in ecological and other subject areas?

Where do you go for well-researched/cited recommendations in your areas of (in)expertise? I desire more evidence-based recommendations in any specific subject, similar to these in conservation efforts, charity, medicine, child-rearing. What about education? Underwater basket weaving? Llama farming? Gardening? Etc, etc, etc.
posted by flicken at 2:18 AM PST - 12 comments

Help me identify a word pronounced differently in Scottish English

I'm trying to identify a specific, commonly used word that's pronounced in a different way in Scottish English. Does anyone have any ideas what this word might be? It's on the tip of my tongue but I can't think of it... More details inside. [more inside]
posted by iamsuper at 12:04 AM PST - 20 comments

February 12

I'm schemin' on a thing, that's arbitrage.

Assuming a Maximum No-Deal Brexit, what impact should I anticipate on a British firm's capacity to ship goods to Australia? [more inside]
posted by MarchHare at 10:39 PM PST - 9 comments

And All the Dogs Threw a Party for your Birthday!

I volunteer at an animal shelter, along with three amazing friends. One of them has a birthday this weekend and we are looking for a way to make it special at the shelter. [more inside]
posted by augustinetill at 10:04 PM PST - 7 comments

there there brain

I've started settling into my life professionally and geographically and such, but my hypervigilant brain is still taking its sweet time relaxing. One area of focus, obviously a large one: non-work time alone. What are some good habits or hobbies or whatnot that communicate the opposite of "you must constantly be manuveuring yourself into new futures/lives/possibilities to avoid being blindsided and hurt"? [more inside]
posted by elephantsvanish at 8:21 PM PST - 14 comments

Not sure how to couch this question but here goes...

Hey I want to buy a (new or used?) sofa-bed or couch for between $50-500 delivered. I do not want to rent a truck or hire a man with a van. What are my options. Cambridge, MA area.
posted by not_on_display at 7:54 PM PST - 17 comments

Belief, memory, and identity: How do they work?

What are the best philosophical works (including novels) you've read that touch on belief (the nature of, not the content of), memory, and identity?
posted by perhapses at 7:44 PM PST - 9 comments

Can I find this shoe bench or similar somewhere?

I pinned this shoe bench from West Elm ages ago and of course they no longer sell it. Know anyone that sells something similar? I specifically like the bent wood part. Happy to order online or go somewhere in-store. I'm in Austin if that helps.
posted by theRussian at 7:32 PM PST - 2 comments

Can you recommend decent, cheap editing help?

Someone has come to me for editing help, and I want to steer her to someone else. Suggestions? [more inside]
posted by swheatie at 6:33 PM PST - 6 comments

There was smoke coming out of my hard drive! Anything I can do now??

My fellow Meafites, Oh why have you led me astray? [more inside]
posted by fantasticness at 5:55 PM PST - 17 comments

What's the best free/cheap + quality/comprehensive genealogy software?

I've got more than two feet stacked up of notebooks, note cards, photocopies, maps, and god knows what all of genealogy I've been working on for more than 30 years. It needs to get computerized. [more inside]
posted by The Almighty Mommy Goddess at 5:48 PM PST - 6 comments

Book ID, possibly for children

I been remembering some oddly specific stuff recently, and so I'm throwing this out for some help filling in gaps. There was a book I didn't read 17 years ago that I'd like to know more about. [more inside]
posted by kevinbelt at 4:31 PM PST - 2 comments

Responding sensitively to sexual abuse disclosure

Possible trigger warning for discussion of sexual abuse/violence: over the past several months, I've developed a strong platonic friendship with a younger man I met through work. Partly due to our jobs, we've had a number of deep discussions about things like feminism, toxic masculinity, and sexual violence. A couple of days ago, during one of these intense conversations, I sensed that he was edging closer to disclosing a personal history of abuse. (I won't go into detail about why, but please accept that there are Reasons for this feeling.) [more inside]
posted by rpfields at 4:06 PM PST - 9 comments

Genealogy fans in England: How do I get WWII records?

I am researching my son's great-grandfather, born ~1911 in England. A census in 1944 lists him as Pvt #[6 digit number], R.A.S.C. Can I use this information to get the rest of his service record? Family lore says he died in the war, but I suppose we don't know that for sure.
posted by xo at 3:19 PM PST - 2 comments

Online exterior design consultation

I'm looking for recommendations for an online exterior designer / advisor. Ideally, I'd like to provide them with pictures of my house from all directions, show them some of my inspirations and ideas, and have them deliver renderings. [more inside]
posted by bjork24 at 2:02 PM PST - 5 comments

When do I quit the startup that's making me crazy?

Has anyone found the "right" time to quit their role at a startup and not regret it? [more inside]
posted by deern the headlice at 1:12 PM PST - 29 comments

A book about --

The author is a woman who had a blog where she recorded every detail of her daily life. [more inside]
posted by Cwell at 1:09 PM PST - 2 comments

Day of the Dead children's resources

I have a sensitive child who saw Coco and is now terrified of the Day of the Dead. When he thinks of it he frequently starts to cry, but he can't seem to stop dwelling on it, and it's incredibly distressing for him. (He is talking to a therapist about it.) Could you suggest resources -- webpages, storybooks, products -- that might help him understand a bit better, and be less frightened of the skeletons? [more inside]
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 12:38 PM PST - 29 comments

Friend's inconsistent behavior is driving me nuts. What's the deal here?

Friend constantly switches between complimenting/praising me for certain attributes/accomplishments and targeted bullying of same attributes/accomplishments. I can't seem to predict which side they're on at any given moment or what triggers it but it's getting to the point where I don't want to be around them for very long anymore. I find it extremely confusing and painful as it feels like they're only being pointedly cruel to me. What could be the issue here and how do I approach it? [more inside]
posted by Young Kullervo at 12:05 PM PST - 44 comments

Stick my experienced nose in other business

I have been hired by a team at a company where a different team previously rejected me. Given the circumstances below the fold, should I/how do I approach the current director of the latter team to offer my experience? [more inside]
posted by Everydayville at 11:59 AM PST - 9 comments

It's mid-February and *now* you want to buy a winter coat?

My anti-shopping SO has finally admitted that he might need outerwear heavier than a Patagonia fleece, even for a mild northern CA winter. Complications: it's the tail end of winter shopping season and he's an uncommon size... [more inside]
posted by serelliya at 11:16 AM PST - 13 comments

Looking for article about vaccines, autism, and family false memories

I remember reading an article about vaccines and autism that I want to share with someone and I can’t find it. The article examined some families’ claims that autism signs appeared in conjunction with vaccination; when contemporaneous home videos, photographs, and interviews with family members were examined, this turned out to be not true, and signs had appeared much earlier. I believe this article may have appeared in the WSJ or NYT in conjunction with a legal decision about the vaccine injury fund. Possibly as long ago as fifteen or twenty years ago.
posted by bq at 11:02 AM PST - 4 comments

Is it safe (to eat)?

Last night, I took a container of frozen, cooked, shredded chicken out of the freezer while putting stuff away and forgot to put it back. This morning, about twelve hours later, I discovered it on top of the fridge. It had thawed and reached room temperature. I immediately labeled it and put it back in the fridge. Given that it was cooked and had been frozen, is it still edible or should I write it off?
posted by suetanvil at 10:17 AM PST - 20 comments

School trip to Portland, STEM style

Kids in my son's STEAM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Art and Math) class (7th and 8th grade) are planning an overnight trip to Portland a Friday/Saturday in May. What should they see/do, related to their theme of Inventors and Inventions? [more inside]
posted by 101cats at 9:07 AM PST - 7 comments

Stopover in Hong Kong, Bangkok with disabled man who may be shirtless?

A friend will fly long-distance as the guardian of a middle aged man with severe mental disability (non-verbal) who is used to taking his shirt off. If this happens during a stop over in Hong Kong or Bangkok airport, where any kind of nudity is against the law, will they get in trouble? [more inside]
posted by yoHighness at 9:01 AM PST - 3 comments

Replacing MacBookPro Butterfly Keyboard

I was purchased one of the MBPs with the defective butterfly keyboards. According to a rep, I qualify for service (see here). However, when I called the Apple Store and the genius said I had to bring it in to be assessed for damage before they would consider any work covered by the program. Has anyone negotiated this transaction at an Apple Store? The MBP itself is not damaged. Thank you! [more inside]
posted by life moves pretty fast at 8:57 AM PST - 9 comments

What does this New Yorker cover mean (June 24, 1974)

I was perplexed by this New Yorker cover. Dog and cat playing chess. Cat clearly winning -- or has already won. However both are apparently dozing. And they are sitting on a globe which suggests some geo-political connection. I cannot find an explanation in anything that was going on in June of '74. Can anyone explain this to me? Thanks
posted by jackmcc at 8:06 AM PST - 17 comments

Older man from church shouldn't be driving

Last night a fellow congregant at my UU church picked me up for a meeting. He's almost 80. He blew through a red light downtown and somehow everyone else reacted quickly and we didn't crash. It was terrifying and I have whiplash. I don't want him to be driving, and I'm trying to figure out what action to take. [more inside]
posted by mermaidcafe at 7:46 AM PST - 19 comments

Sewing machine purchase

PartnerSky wants a sewing machine to do very basic work. What should we buy? [more inside]
posted by AlexiaSky at 7:21 AM PST - 22 comments

Is my power adapter extension cable compatible with new laptop?

I bought a new power cable with an extension cable for my 2013 Macbook Pro last July. I ended up getting a new Macbook Pro laptop last week, and they don't come with the extension cable anymore, it seems. I really like that extra length. Before I buy a new one, is there any reason why I can't use the one I already have? [more inside]
posted by Stewriffic at 7:08 AM PST - 5 comments

Rural roads. Gravel or asphalt?

Over time, including installation, maintenance, plowing , everything -which is more cost effective- asphalt or gravel? [more inside]
posted by Hobgoblin at 5:41 AM PST - 12 comments

how to handle a worrying text message

A newer member of an informal group sent an angry, sort of threatening text message to another, super nice, member. We don't all know each other that well, and it's a mystery where the anger is coming from. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 5:29 AM PST - 37 comments

Hyping up Rome to a 5 year old

We will almost certainly vacation in Rome this May. It is one of my wife’s and my favorite places. It will be my 5-year-old daughter’s first trip to Europe, which is exciting for her, but she doesn’t know much about Rome, compared to Paris or London. Can you recommend some age-appropriate media to introduce her to the Eternal City? [more inside]
posted by Admiral Haddock at 4:19 AM PST - 18 comments

Tips for Hadrian's Wall lodge-to-lodge hike in July?

Just what it says on the tin. My best friend is moving to the UK this summer, and I want to take the opportunity to cross the Hadrian's Wall Path off my bucket list. I'm looking for recommendations of companies who can arrange it, thoughts from those who have done it, must see spots, etc.
posted by frumiousb at 3:03 AM PST - 7 comments

February 11

Help me decide whether to try ketamine therapy for depression

I have dysthymia (chronic low-level depression) and am considering ketamine-assisted therapy. But it's very expensive ($3000) and from online research I can't decide whether it's likely enough to help to be worth the expense. What does MeFi think? [more inside]
posted by zeri at 11:11 PM PST - 11 comments

Navigating the TriMet system (Portland)

This is me. I think I've done pretty well on the plane piece, and now I'm wigging out looking at the public transportation system. [more inside]
posted by intrepid_simpleton at 7:32 PM PST - 15 comments

What are some foods we eat every day most likely to kill us?

I'm trying to write a sketch called "kill them with kindness." My premise is people breaking bread with folks who hold badly dated views. Except they take them to a cafe where the menu, long term, statistically, will kill you. But not badly made blowfish. Or spoiled stuff. I mean everyday grub. Like charred meat leading to higher cancer risk from carcinogens. So what else is on this deadly menu?
posted by rileyray3000 at 7:12 PM PST - 48 comments

Advice for a last-second drive from SF to DC

In about a week I need to rent a car and drive all my things across the country. What do I need to know ahead of time regarding the route and places to stay along the way? I'm especially worried about bad weather and/or someone stealing all my stuff. [more inside]
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 4:51 PM PST - 21 comments

Help with compulsive behaviors and anxiety?

I'm a 37-year-old female with a history of depression and anxiety. The latter has worsened recently and I seem to be developing some compulsive behaviors. Has anyone experienced or treated these types of issues, who could help me understand why I'm doing these things to myself and how to stop? [more inside]
posted by AnnaBegins942 at 3:57 PM PST - 20 comments

Is there an elegant way to get linked data in Google Sheets?

Basically I have two sheets on one spreadsheet (Dashboard and Resources). One, Dashboard, is used to generate a drop down based on this criteria: =Resources!$B$2:$B. This works correctly and populates the drop down with the name of the values of that column from the Resources sheet and the user may select, "Gold," or =Resources!$B$23. I'd like to get the Price column in C, Resource!$C$23 based on user's selection. This does not work. [more inside]
posted by geoff. at 2:38 PM PST - 10 comments

Best way to redeem Chase Ultimate Rewards for flight to Europe?

Hi everyone! I'm new to the Chase Ultimate Rewards program and I'm looking to plan a trip to the UK this fall (September 15 to October 6), flying out of Seattle, WA. I've been reading various forums that talk about different ways to transfer and spend points, but I'm not sure if it's better to book using the travel portal directly or through a partner point redemption. All the options are quite confusing. Does anyone have any recommendations on the best, most cost-effective route? Is there an easy tool to compare redemption options? Thanks!
posted by Aanidaani at 2:33 PM PST - 7 comments

Opera, hockey game, *and* summer dress.

The bag I'm looking for must go well with the three conditions above. I think I may have found it. The size is perfect! What I need help with: Black would be my go-to, but would any other available color fit with the above three things? Nothing light-colored, of course; I want to keep the inevitable hand-grime to a minimum. Also: Would you indeed declare this bag to be the thing? I'm pretty nutty about it.
posted by BostonTerrier at 2:26 PM PST - 14 comments

Safe to drive from Seattle to Vancouver this weekend?

I had a planned trip to visit some Internet Friends in Vancouver, Canada this weekend. However, all this snow is making me anxious about the trip. Should I be worried about driving on the highway in this weather? [more inside]
posted by isauteikisa at 2:07 PM PST - 17 comments

What should I feed these hungry cats?

I've been feeding 4 cats 3-4 5.5oz cans of Authority wet food a day, and I free-feed Authority grain-free dry as well. Cats are in great shape but I'm wondering if there is a better food out there for these guys that isn't PetSmart-exclusive... [more inside]
posted by possibilityleft at 2:06 PM PST - 7 comments

A Book of Monsters

I am looking for an original taxonomy of monsters. [more inside]
posted by nantucket at 1:23 PM PST - 5 comments

New climate model sounds promising. Is it?

Scientists, researchers, professionals in the field: I just heard about the One Earth Climate Model, which was funded by the Leonardo DiCaprio Foundation. Does the framework and claims for this model appear to be bogus, potentially reasonable, or is it simply too early to tell? (Please do not respond if you consider my question stupid or offensive. Thank you!) [more inside]
posted by Bella Donna at 12:29 PM PST - 5 comments

The house foundation is cracked. It's winter. What to do?

I noticed water damage on a basement wall yesterday and, sure enough, the foundation is cracked right on the other side of it. I've got requests for inspection/quotes in with the only two (really?) foundation repair companies I could find in the area, but is there anything I can/should do myself in the meanwhile? Photos. [more inside]
posted by teremala at 12:24 PM PST - 7 comments

Songs like Radiohead’s Creep?

What other songs are like Creep by Radiohead in terms of subject matter? My general preference is that they not be songs about how you are getting laid a lot but are also lonely. (Ahem, Drake). PURE LONELINESS ONLY, THANKS.
posted by Rock 'em Sock 'em at 12:16 PM PST - 52 comments

What is teamwork again?

Please help me with suggestions on how I can adjust to working in an office environment again after more than a decade working independently. More inside. [more inside]
posted by longjump at 11:58 AM PST - 4 comments

What's wrong with my brain/memory... ?

In 2016, I had a TIA, and immediately started suffering memory problems (details below the fold). I've had an MRI, CT Scans, EEGs, tests for early Alzheimer's, and every other test imaginable, it seems. Some of them more than once. Doctors tell me nothing is wrong and the problems I'm having aren't "really" memory problems--though are reluctant to call them something else. They suggest perhaps I'm "just not paying attention." I've never had difficulty paying attention and my memory degradation was overnight and not gradual. Any assistance appreciated... [more inside]
posted by dobbs at 11:57 AM PST - 19 comments

in the market for a deep-seated couch

Do you have a couch you love where the seats are deep enough to comfortably nap on? Tell me about it! [more inside]
posted by 2019 at 11:35 AM PST - 15 comments

Fussy knitting question: decreasing in linen stitch

I'm making a project in linen stitch (with cotton yarn, which is a pretty hateful combination) and it just called for a decrease. I'm not sure how things match up from the next row on. [more inside]
posted by Smearcase at 11:34 AM PST - 3 comments

Where to buy good smoked salmon (nova / lox) in Washington, DC?

I'm a huge lover of smoked salmon (aka nova aka lox*), but I've been generally disappointed with the supermarket brands I've been able to buy in DC. Are there any places you like in the District that sell particularly good stuff? Thanks for your recommendations! [more inside]
posted by Conrad Cornelius o'Donald o'Dell at 10:46 AM PST - 8 comments

Experiences with Thinkful and Code Academy

I need a mid-career skills update, with a focus on full stack development. Does Thinkful provide good courses and deliver on its promises? How about Code Academy? It looks like Thinkful provides a lot more structure and costs a lot more. I'm interested in hearing about experiences with both these options and others as well. [more inside]
posted by Winnie the Proust at 10:09 AM PST - 3 comments

I've never been single while in recovery, and I'm not sure what to do

I have been in relationships pretty much my entire adult life - I've had a combined period of about a year of singledom in my twenties, but otherwise have pretty much jumped from relationship to relationship. I am in a relationship with someone I love dearly, but I am concerned that I don't really know who I am outside of the context of a relationship, and I want to find that out. I need advice on how to precede or alternative ways of navigating this. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 8:13 AM PST - 13 comments

AMAB -> nonbinary -> "But you still LOOK like a guy..."

I'm looking for recommendations of stories/experiences (blogs, books, etc) of AMAB people who now identify as non-binary, but have kept a "male" appearance in terms of body hair, fashion, and the like. I'm mostly interested in their self-discovery journeys, but day-to-day experiences are also welcome.
posted by anonymous at 8:10 AM PST - 5 comments

Best dual-SIM phone under $400USD

Can anyone recommend a dual-SIM phone which would work in the US and Europe and has a decent camera and should last 2 years at least? I'd prefer something that isn't a phablet...one-handed operation is a good thing, as is fitting into a pocket. My original budget was $200, but under $300 is preferred. Or should I bite the bullet and get the used Galaxy s9 for $400? (Background and details in "extended explanation") [more inside]
posted by Musichick2004 at 8:08 AM PST - 14 comments

Nonprofits with Amazon wishlists

I have a coffee can full of small change. My local Coinstar offers Amazon credit for small change. What are some nonprofits that have active Amazon wishlists?
posted by pxe2000 at 6:38 AM PST - 17 comments

Nonfiction book ideas for 5 year old?

I'd like to get some nonfiction kids books for my five year old. We have a few from the library -- one about space, in particular, was a hit -- but most all seem a bit wordy and often too complicated for her age range. Any suggestions of others, on any topic? I mean, is there like a "Bearenstain Bears" of nonfiction? :)
posted by heavenknows at 6:11 AM PST - 27 comments

I need a new laptop.

I use mine mostly for web browsing, watching video, and email, so i don't need anything too fancy on power and memory. But I do play a few simple games and love puzzles, so a touch screen is a must. I also want the keyboard to be relatively easy to disassemble to clean. I carry it around pretty often, so weight is also a factor. Thanks!
posted by backwards compatible at 4:18 AM PST - 7 comments

Do you know a good psychotherapist in or near Santa Monica, California?

I'm looking for an open-minded psychotherapist who practices in or around Santa Monica, California for talk therapy and life-strategizing. Can anyone recommend a good one?
posted by bertran at 1:32 AM PST - 4 comments

February 10

Alert! Alert!

I need a visual alert system for smoke, carbon monoxide...and maybe other things? There are options - many options. They all look expensive and crappy. Perhaps someone here has experience with this? [more inside]
posted by Toddles at 8:34 PM PST - 9 comments

Good scar oils / creams

I have a fresh incision that I plan to work on soon to keep the tissue soft. What scar oils or creams work well? [more inside]
posted by Crystalinne at 8:19 PM PST - 15 comments

Cream soda recipes ?...

Looking for recipes or other things to do with a bottle of vanilla extract that actually smells and tastes like cream soda flavoring. [more inside]
posted by leslievictoria at 7:20 PM PST - 3 comments

Newsletter aggregators

I subscribe to too many newsletters and want to read them outside of my email account. [more inside]
posted by mecran01 at 6:45 PM PST - 11 comments

New to Metformin - any tips?

Prediabetic (AC1 at 6.4 for many months) and have started Metformin (500 mg once a day). I'm on Day 3 and so far no side effects. If you've taken it, can you share if and when side effects kicked in / how effective you've found the medication / any optimistic bits about how this will help me lose weight ? I am hoping to be less hungry soon, but that hasn't yet happened.
posted by Ink-stained wretch at 6:21 PM PST - 10 comments

Intense cross-stitching pain stupidity

I worked on a piece for my daughter not realising that 7560 stitches with a birthday deadline was a lot (this is the pattern - I made it into a little bag) and after a week of working on it, stayed up all night stitching 18 hours straight to finish. Three days later my right hand and lower arm still ache. Is this RSI? How do I fix my hand? I have things to do!
posted by dorothyisunderwood at 6:05 PM PST - 13 comments

Aidez-moi à Montréal

I think? I am going to visit Montreal for a few days in mid-March. I will be alone, not going for work, just to bum around and get away from my kinda stressful day-to-day. I am looking for recommendations for 1) hotel 2) spas 3) eateries and 4) sites/things to do. Specific needs/wants within. [more inside]
posted by soren_lorensen at 4:59 PM PST - 22 comments

How can I feel better about contributing to my Roth IRA?

How can I feel better about contributing to my Roth IRA? [more inside]
posted by ghostbikes at 4:35 PM PST - 13 comments

Web site for buying appliance maintenace manuals

In 2016 my dishwasher broke. I paid $10 to some web site to sell me the maintenance manual. Like not users' guide, but the manual that tells repair people to press these two buttons at once to enter repair mode, then this button to drain or whatever. Now I need that manual again. I can't find it. What would the web site have been? [more inside]
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 4:00 PM PST - 9 comments

Hope me find & choose appropriate professional development!

I just recently hit a ceiling in my department and would like to pursue professional development while I sort out further career steps. My current higher ed job doesn't fall neatly into one specific dominion and I haven't found many external professional development options that seem relevant to me. Can you help me identify some decent options? [more inside]
posted by seemoorglass at 3:37 PM PST - 6 comments

Communication between busy adult children & not-busy parents

How do you manage expectations of contact frequency and communication at a distance? I think my adult relationship with my parents needs a process-focused reboot, and I’m looking for ideas and suggestions on long distance communication styles. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 3:23 PM PST - 39 comments

Robot Apocalypse Dry Run?

With all of the emphasis on Artificial Intelligence, and Ray Kruzweil trumpeting it while Stephen Hawking warned against it, has anybody done a dry run on where self-learning intelligence would go if left unchecked? [more inside]
posted by CollectiveMind at 3:02 PM PST - 15 comments

Entry level trades adjacent jobs for a teen

My 16 year old is looking for a part time job. She's interested in the trades and has a flexible schedule. She doesn't drive. Ideas? [more inside]
posted by latkes at 2:28 PM PST - 14 comments

Not in UK, want to watch Stewart Copeland's "Guitar, Bass and Drums"

Can I watch this outside of the UK? It seems one must download a player from BBC that is only available in the UK. The show looks awesome (clip) and I'd like to see it.
posted by klausman at 1:19 PM PST - 3 comments

My Google News feed is infected

How do I convince Google News that I don't care about K*lie J*nner or the K*rdashians? (names obscured for reasons that will become clear) [more inside]
posted by dephlogisticated at 12:50 PM PST - 15 comments

Job me. Career me. Fulfill me.

For the past several years I have essentially been self-employed doing gig / contract work, but now I am looking for something(s) new to do. Perhaps I should look for something more stable...more career-y...while also being fulfilling...but really, any suggestions are welcome. I would ask a career counselor for help if there was one around here. I realize that some of the details within may be redundant and excessive, but maybe it'll help generate ideas. Plenty of snowflakes if you didn't get enough this winter. [more inside]
posted by ditto75 at 12:27 PM PST - 2 comments


So, naturalists observe, a flea Has smaller fleas that on him prey . . . The dang cat has fleas again. Which presumably means both cats have fleas. Again. [more inside]
posted by aspersioncast at 12:23 PM PST - 13 comments

Use an old iPhone as an iPod?

I still have my previous phone, a Verizon iPhone 6s Plus with 64gb of memory. It works fine. It does not have a cell plan anymore. What's the easiest way to use it as basically an iPod? [more inside]
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 12:22 PM PST - 6 comments

Is there a way of keeping sperm alive long enough post them to a friend?

So... I'm not trying to be nasty, but please don't tell me about how using a friend as a sperm donor is a bad idea or the complications with it... Google has already tried to do that several times (more inside/in extended explanation). [more inside]
posted by sockpim at 11:29 AM PST - 15 comments

which of the 4324737492 different Vatican tours is right for us?

A friend and I are spending a week in Rome, right near Vatican City. We want to see some cool, weird, old stuff, and we need specific advice on how best to do that in the Vatican. We're also interested in more general advice on where to go in Rome and Milan. [more inside]
posted by yomimono at 10:00 AM PST - 9 comments

Things to do in LA with a 6 year old movie buff?

So we're taking 6.5 year old Schwingg! Jr. to LA next week and looking for movie industry things to do! He's very interested in the history of movie production, silent movies, and black & white comedies. Pretty much uninterested in going to Disney. To give you an idea, here are the stars he wants to see on the Walk of Fame: Buster Keaton, Charlie Chaplin, Erol Flynn, Oliver Hardy, Stan Laurel, Groucho Marx, and Donald Trump. I understand that most of the movie set tours don't allow kids under 8, so that puts us in a bind. Ideas for movie activities (and any other non-Disney activities?)
posted by schwinggg! at 9:51 AM PST - 22 comments

where was this picture of Broken Social Scene taken?

This picture of the band Broken Social Scene looks like it was taken on the platform of a railway station - the visible part of the sign reads "ewes Street". What's the full name of the station (if it is a station?), and where in the world is it?
posted by rd45 at 9:37 AM PST - 3 comments

Nice beer/cocktail bar in DC?

Can you recommend a nice bar in DC where I can get a seat on Friday around 10:30 PM? I am a cocktail/beer snob and would like to find somewhere relatively near Union Station where I can drink something fancy after my train gets in. [more inside]
posted by ferret branca at 8:43 AM PST - 13 comments

Free/very low cost venues for small conference in the Los Angeles area?

A online discussion / blogger group I'm involved in is looking to hold a 2 day small conference in the Los Angeles area for about 50ish people this June and they're looking a venue that could be free (or very low cost) . This is not a for-profit group but they don't have official nonprofit status. This might be a tall order but I was asked to look into this and thought the MeFi hive mind might know! Thanks for any suggestions!
posted by zresearch at 8:19 AM PST - 3 comments


I have this friend, who is a complex character that I have seen a therapist about and THEY didn't know what to make of him. He's costing me my mental health with a ganja habit that has very clearly, for years, been terrible for me to be around - words that have come out of my mouth - and there are too many behaviors to ask for behavior changes. And he is my roommate now because Life and Stupidity. How do I DTMFA with my circumstances? [more inside]
posted by thebotanyofsouls at 7:41 AM PST - 25 comments

How to download ALL the data from my Facebook page

I'm trying to close and archive a 'fan' page I created years ago. After doing 'download page' and looking at the file, all the most important stuff is missing. [more inside]
posted by greta simone at 6:08 AM PST - 4 comments

How safe is it to buy tickets on StubHub?

How likely am I to get scammed with a fake ticket on StubHub vs Ticketmaster or Craigslist? [more inside]
posted by sunflower16 at 3:30 AM PST - 14 comments

Non-physical ways to show affection

What are non-physical ways of showing affection? I'm looking for examples that work for a long distance romantic couple who might not be able to see each other very often, so physical things like squeezes and hugs are not possible most of the time. The kind of affection I mean the most is the little connecting things that couples do that form a sort of inner communication within the relationship that brings the couple together or reconnects them to one another, keeping their connection strong. Any kind welcome, verbal especially. Thanks for all your ideas!
posted by fairlynearlyready at 1:36 AM PST - 20 comments

Spicy food paradox

Do people that enjoy extremely hot and spicy food a) enjoy and relish the extreme spiciness or b) are so immune to the extreme spiciness that they don't actually feel it to the same extent?
posted by iamsuper at 12:25 AM PST - 27 comments

February 9

Russian short story: man’s wife dead & he stores her frozen body in shed

I’m looking for a short story that I think is Russian, maybe Chekhov. In the story a man’s wife dies, and because it’s winter he puts the body in the shed for lack of other options. Because the body is frozen he just keeps it there for a long time. When he has to go out there, he hangs his lantern on her jaw, which is frozen open. Anybody know the title of this story?
posted by cmp4Meta at 9:36 PM PST - 1 comment

Should I quit my second job? I'm only one month in.

I'm really worried about this. I left my first job 9 months after being there, it was a terrible place and I just could not handle it. I needed to get out of there so I took another offer bur now I'm not sure if I made a mistake. [more inside]
posted by Braxis at 9:28 PM PST - 20 comments

80s/90s TV episode involving a Chinese student/political activist

I have a memory of an episode of 21 Jump Street in which police go undercover at a university, and there is a Chinese foreign student who, it turns out, is also a political activist and is worried that he is being spied on by other Chinese students. However, Googling shows no such episode as existing, so I must be mixing 21 Jump Street up with some other show. What might I be thinking of?
posted by Bugbread at 8:56 PM PST - 3 comments

My friend is mad at me for asking her dog to wear a service vest.

Out of the blue, my friend told me today she was annoyed with me for expecting her deaf service dog to wear a service vest when entering/leaving my apartment. I am not sure how to proceed. [more inside]
posted by dubious_dude at 8:35 PM PST - 46 comments

Well now it's a thingamajig-whatsamabobber!

For a short story: if you could magically combine any 2-3 (non-living) household objects in order to create a cool/wacky hybrid of the two, what would you combine? [more inside]
posted by egeanin at 8:12 PM PST - 18 comments

Quick, I need prank ideas!

I'm going to a friends house to let their dog out in a couple hours. They wistfully reminded me last time we hung out how that the job we both worked at, everyone used to prank each other. I would like to start the prank war; need some ideas that I can put together on short notice. [more inside]
posted by [insert clever name here] at 7:13 PM PST - 30 comments

List of artists with "broken" minds?

I'm starting to get into drawing and was wondering if the hivemind could name some artists for me whose work I could discover who explored different states of mind like psychosis, hallucinations, and delusions and the emotional states that came with that. Basically, I'd like to see the art of a mind that is "broken" in some way. Thanks!
posted by Gosha_Dog at 6:36 PM PST - 20 comments

Spin me right round baby right round

I'm looking for suggestions on reliable spin bikes that won't break the bank. [more inside]
posted by sweetpotato at 6:19 PM PST - 1 comment

Getting a black and white image printed

Where can I get an image printed on nice textured paper? [more inside]
posted by mermily at 5:40 PM PST - 4 comments

Looking for a poem about interdependence

I’m trying to find a poem that I originally saw on either Facebook or Instagram. It began with something like this (in meaning/sentiment but not in exact words) Your determination to rely only on yourself/ Is something that we can no longer afford. The poem goes on to address the reader, arguing that strong communities are built through relationships of interdependence in which people choose to rely on each other. Rather than simply encouraging the reader to reach out for help, it frames their/our stubborn insistence on pure self-reliance as a selfish act that weakens community by denying others the opportunity connect with us and each other through mutual aid. It may have come out of disability activism or possibly permaculture circles. Not necessarily a published poem from a book - possibly just a screenshot of a Tumblr post. Does this ring a bell for anyone?
posted by embrangled at 5:37 PM PST - 1 comment

ideas for low-stress standing social events

I am looking for a regular social activity I can organise and invite friends and acquaintances to, which does not require ongoing commitment or skill. [more inside]
posted by unicorn chaser at 5:24 PM PST - 13 comments

Worth it to file homeowners insurance claim?

Is it worth it to involve homeowners insurance in a water damage claim? The cost of fixing could be anywhere between "just clears the deductible" to "remodel your kitchen" depending on whether we'd go for just the bare minimum to address the immediate problem or something more extensive. [more inside]
posted by expialidocious at 3:45 PM PST - 6 comments

How can I fix these boots to be wearable?

I have a pair of Baretraps boots with ~2" heel, and they are terribly uncomfortable. The problem seems like the outer mid-foot/outside arch area is too high maybe? The soles are hard as rocks and that particular area weirdly is where all the weight lands, not the heel or the ball. I stuck in a pair of half-sole heel gel inserts, and they helped some but still not great. What can I do to fix this? Would a cobbler be able to help?
posted by lemonade at 3:44 PM PST - 1 comment

which tablet do I want, which tablet do I need.

I need a tablet for school and I'm not sure which one will work best for my needs. [more inside]
posted by poffin boffin at 2:32 PM PST - 14 comments

Plan My Time Off For Me

In about a week, I will be at the Long Beach Convention Center in California. I don't know if I will have time off, but if I did, are there any used book stores that shouldn't be missed? Anything else there that is a must see? [more inside]
posted by wittgenstein at 2:30 PM PST - 2 comments

Kittens 101

Just came home from the SPCA with 3 foster kittens for a week... hope me, a complete noob. [more inside]
posted by monocot at 2:29 PM PST - 16 comments

Contacted out of the blue by estranged elderly relative

My grandmother was married to a man named "Paul" for 35 years. I grew up with him as my grandfather. After my grandmother died, the whole family's relationship with him deteriorated to the point of zero contact. After not speaking to Paul for over 10 years he found my email address and sent me a message this week. He is 85 years old now, and I'm not sure how to respond (lots of details below the fold). [more inside]
posted by forkisbetter at 12:59 PM PST - 15 comments

ISO Reference (not recipe) book or website for Instant Pot

I would like a reference book or web site for cooking with an Instant Pot. I want actual guidelines on how to figure out how long to cook things, how to think about natural vent versus fast vent, how to adapt recipes, etc. [more inside]
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 12:55 PM PST - 3 comments

Pneumonia and colds

I had pneumonia about four weeks ago, without any symptoms such as a cough, cold or breathlessness. I'd like to understand this better and know whether I can do anything to prevent it happening again. I've also now got a bad cold with breathlessness and would like to know whether there's any risk of this re-igniting pneumonia. [more inside]
posted by paduasoy at 12:18 PM PST - 7 comments

Adding a few extra days to a business trip to Japan--where to go?

I have a week-long business trip to Japan (near Osaka) scheduled at the end of May, if I were to tack on a few days where would I go? [more inside]
posted by LarryC at 12:13 PM PST - 9 comments

The name of a novel in which a woman treats her lover badly

Another name-that-book-title question. The twist is that usually people want to know the name of a book that they loved; I want to know the name of this particular book because I disliked it so very much. [more inside]
posted by chromium at 12:01 PM PST - 8 comments

Recommend me new (to me) sff to love

I took a long hiatus form reading authors I was unfamiliar with, but I'm ready to get back to reading new-to-me authors after several positive experiences. Please recommend some I will enjoy. [more inside]
posted by Cozybee at 11:10 AM PST - 42 comments

Which TV shows are limited on Hulu?

I have the paid, commercial-free version of Hulu. I know this allows me all of Hulu's catalog, but I'm trying to figure out which TV shows are limited in what's allowed on Hulu, for their currently-airing shows. [more inside]
posted by lea724 at 10:42 AM PST - 1 comment

What do I put in this box?

I'm filling out a Statement of Identity form as part of the title process while buying a new house. There's a box on the form that looks like this: "My signature can be verified by: ___________________" What should I write in the box? [more inside]
posted by jeffamaphone at 10:22 AM PST - 7 comments

What's a good replacement for Google Inbox on Android?

Google Inbox is going away :(((((( Do you have any good suggestions for an Android-compatible replacement that also supports bundling messages by label? (I have terrible piles of email, and looking at all of it at once without some kind of pre-sorting and filtering is intensely stressful. Directly filing to directories is a good way to ensure that mail doesn’t get read.) A program that doesn’t bundle mail might be acceptable if you have a good alternate workflow for dealing with sorting email. BONUS POINTS for programs that supports providers other than Google.
posted by Going To Maine at 10:07 AM PST - 7 comments

Mouse Turds, Aging parent, Good Lord Hope Me Metafilter

Estranged middle daughter, aging parent, awol caretaker brother, and kitchen full of mouse turds.... help me sort this clusterfuck, please. [more inside]
posted by Gyre,Gimble,Wabe, Esq. at 9:31 AM PST - 20 comments

Vancouver Island in June?

How crowded/touristy does Vancouver Island get in June? [more inside]
posted by MundaneNoodle at 9:00 AM PST - 3 comments

Help me open this oak chest

I have a conundrum it was suggested I present to the cloud mind that is Metafilter. I bought this big old oak chest at a flea market today (it's probably 1300x600x600 mm or so) with three locks in the front, and but one key. [more inside]
posted by St. Oops at 8:56 AM PST - 11 comments

Fellow journalists, how do you deal with PR companies?

I'm looking for better ways to manage the overwhelming number of pitches I get each day and not miss the tiny percentage I'm actually interested in. I'm looking for suggestions both for sorting through pitches and how to interact with the PR people contacting me. (I read last year that there are now six PR people for each journalist, and it feels like it.) [more inside]
posted by pinochiette at 8:32 AM PST - 9 comments

Baby, baby, the stars are shining for you... name help please!

My wife and I are expecting a baby girl in April. Since the beginning of the pregnancy we've been partial to a combo family name after each of our maternal grandmothers. It isn't feeling like "the name" though so we're going back to the drawing board. [more inside]
posted by timpanogos at 8:25 AM PST - 41 comments

What are these "barrel hinges" for purse frames called really?

What is the hinge on this tubular purse frame called outside of the purse world? Web page describes it as a "barrel hinge", but searching barrel hinge comes up with something completely different. Any chance of sourcing same or similar hinges without buying a whole bag frame--maybe with faster shipping?
posted by anaelith at 8:06 AM PST - 3 comments

Help me help other readers talk about books!

I’ve been asked to lead a bookclub next month at a bookstore. Yay! I’ve belonged to book clubs in the past, but not as a facilitator. The book is fiction, I will of course have read it at least once before we meet, and I’ll have a few prepared questions provided by the publisher available in advance. Treats and coffee will be provided. What do I need to know/do to encourage attendees (who will probably not know each other) to feel comfortable to join in the discussion and hopefully keep participants coming back?
posted by bookmammal at 6:16 AM PST - 9 comments

February 8

The art of the electronic nag

Let's say you have to ask someone to do something for you over e-mail and they do not get back to you. How frequently can one (re)ask without coming off as a nag? [more inside]
posted by jenfullmoon at 10:39 PM PST - 13 comments

Really small, really cheap computer for photo slideshow

We put on a booth every year at a big local dog show to educate people about our breed. Part of this booth is a screen displaying dog photos. I've always been worried that that the MacBook Pro we use for the slide show will wander off when my back is turned. So I'm looking for a better way. [more inside]
posted by kindall at 10:35 PM PST - 19 comments

New Laptop, 2019 edition

Asking for recommendations for a general purpose relatively inexpensive new laptop, [more inside]
posted by ovvl at 8:41 PM PST - 3 comments

I received these books in error. Is it ethical for me to sell them?

I ordered some books directly from a press. When the package came, I found it full of totally different books. The company that fulfilled the order does not want it back. I now have four copies of a fairly specialized textbook. Can I dispose of these books as I see fit? In particular, would there be anything ethically wrong with selling them, e.g. on a used books website? [more inside]
posted by a certain Sysoi Pafnut'evich at 8:27 PM PST - 16 comments

Should I change my name back?

Should I take my maiden name back in my divorce? In particular I'm wondering whether it would help or hurt me, even in a subtle way, in looking for a job. My married name is very Anglo, easy to spell, and I've had it for decades. My maiden name is very Italian and hard to spell. I live in a region that's super white, but many institutions--especially the ones I'd like to work at--are really working on diversity. Would it make any difference at all? I'm really not sure of my feelings on this so am trying to look at the practical aspects. Actually any reflections on your experience with changing your name would be welcome.
posted by HotToddy at 7:13 PM PST - 29 comments

Therapy is weird

I've been seeing my therapist for about a year. We have a great rapport, but something is bothering me about seeing her. I feel like she's my friend even though she's not and I don't want her to be. Or maybe I just feel like therapy is weird because it is weird? [more inside]
posted by starlybri at 6:47 PM PST - 11 comments

Should I contact my ex? Part 2

There has been a sudden turn of events that has gotten me pretty upset. I could use some advice again. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 6:04 PM PST - 19 comments

Melbourne filter: the awesomest things to do, see and eat

We're going to be in Melbourne, Australia for a month! What are cool things we should do, see and eat beyond the top 10 tourist items? Personal interest details inside... [more inside]
posted by rednikki at 5:09 PM PST - 12 comments

Did someone plant a bomb inside my car at the hippie grocery store?!

My 2012 Volvo C30's key fobs stopped working this afternoon. Both of them. I was able to unlock my car with the manual key in the driver's door, and start it (which disabled the alarm that was set off when I opened the door) to drive home.* However, there's a rapid clicking sound coming from (1) under my driver's seat and (2) the passenger door. And the sound continues even when the car is off and they key is out of the ignition. You can hear it from outside the car with both doors closed. [more inside]
posted by marylynn at 4:37 PM PST - 10 comments

What cable do I need?

I want to be able to screen mirror/play videos from a browser on my iPad or MacBook Pro on my tv. What cables do I need? [more inside]
posted by HonoriaGlossop at 4:28 PM PST - 4 comments

Out-of-network claim reimbursement questions

Is there any way I can get my insurance company to reimburse out-of-network claims if the deadline for service/submitting has passed? What about expired checks from previous approvals? [more inside]
posted by unannihilated at 4:21 PM PST - 6 comments

Alternative to Crooks and Liars? Also, a Canadian equivalent?

I visit CrooksAndLiars.com a few times a day to keep up on American politics (I'm a Canadian). All I do is watch the videos--I do not interact on the forums. However, I can no longer tolerate their clickbait hyperbole bullshit, terrible ads, and doubleclick battery-draining code... What's a good alternative site that curates videos re: American politics/news? Also, is there an equivalent site for Canadian politics?
posted by dobbs at 3:28 PM PST - 5 comments

Can I Eat This, Lunch Edition

So at work, during colder months, not in summer, I like to eat my lunches outside. The fridges in breakrooms gross me out. So I keep my lunches, which are always meatless, and are always sandwiches, wrapped in frozen ice packs in my trunk. Would you eat it? [more inside]
posted by Armed Only With Hubris at 3:18 PM PST - 39 comments

What exactly makes a parent NOT "good enough"?

"A good-enough mother like porn, we know her when we see her." -- Winnicott, probably? [more inside]
posted by MiraK at 3:07 PM PST - 14 comments

Can you make gelatin from burned bones?

I understand that "fresh" ones might be better or at least yield more, but would any usable amount of material be available after bones are burned, baked, incinerated, or whatever? [more inside]
posted by Mister Moofoo at 2:53 PM PST - 5 comments

Long coat for walking in freezing temperatures

Walkers in the winter, lend me your coats! If you were walking around a city in temperatures just below freezing, what coat would you choose? [more inside]
posted by wnissen at 1:58 PM PST - 20 comments

What’s The Deal With Weehawken

I’m interested in living in Weehawken and commuting to Hudson Yards. I don’t drive. (I WON’T drive). What’s living there like? What is the commute like? What else do I need to know?
posted by Rock 'em Sock 'em at 1:16 PM PST - 9 comments

How can I get these old boiled sweets?

I'm trying to find a kind of old boiled sweets that my partner remembers from the nineties, probably in the UK but possibly Cape Town. They were spherical, about the size of a marble (or a 5p coin) and brightly coloured, and some of them might have had stripes. They were fruit flavoured, and apparently referred to as humbugs (but they're not what I could now call a humbug). They came in a flat round tin. We were super excited when we found Simpkins travel sweets but sadly they're not right: they're too big and flat, and not brightly coloured enough. Any leads on what these might be or how to source them in the UK?
posted by katrielalex at 12:33 PM PST - 5 comments

How to make morning routine more bearable?

I like my job just fine once I get there and get underway. But I find I dread getting up in the morning. How can I brain hack/life hack this? [more inside]
posted by ficbot at 12:05 PM PST - 12 comments

Facebook page call-to-action buttons

I'm trying to add a "call to action" button to my Facebook business page but there doesn't seem to be an option to do so and googling provides no helpful information. Please help! [more inside]
posted by thereemix at 11:53 AM PST - 7 comments

Help me feel better!

I'm nauseated all the time, exhausted, and sad. What can I do to feel better while I’m likely to be sick for a while? [more inside]
posted by lookoutbelow at 11:41 AM PST - 28 comments

Can I nip this ear infection in the bud?

I think I might be coming down with an ear infection. I would like to prevent it getting a toehold. [more inside]
posted by delight at 11:27 AM PST - 4 comments

If you suggest going out to eat please know that goes badly

My Mom is coming over for lunch on Sunday. My Mom is hard to feed, please help. [more inside]
posted by lepus at 11:27 AM PST - 19 comments

Non-resident income tax issues (how exciting)

I'm a little confused about my tax situation for last year due to a mistake made by my employer—they withheld income tax for the state in which they are located; I work remotely from another state. What do? [more inside]
posted by sinfony at 11:18 AM PST - 4 comments

British aliens in America!

How many UK nationals currently reside in the United States? How many are in the US without official authorization? How many have typically been arrested, detained, or deported in recent years? [more inside]
posted by skoosh at 10:55 AM PST - 7 comments

Side dishes to spice up vegan lettuce wraps

My dinner guest tonight is vegan, and I’m celiac. I’m planning the main menu item to be vegan lettuce wraps with peanut sauce and tofu or soy curls, carrots, cucumber, avocado, shiitakes, and vermicelli noodles for the filling. What side dishes should I make to go with it? [more inside]
posted by cnidaria at 10:44 AM PST - 10 comments

Hamster best practices and lessons learned

I've got a new floof in the family, Waddells Hammbletonian Davenport, a long haired male Syrian hamster. Yay! I haven't had a hamster in 15+ years. He has a huge cage, appropriate bedding, and the best water bottle and laboratory-grade rodent food, but I need enrichment/toy ideas. What does your hamster love most? [more inside]
posted by fiercecupcake at 9:14 AM PST - 8 comments

Helping friend who may be having paranoid delusions

I have a friend who in recent times has experienced very rough, life-changing experiences, and is suffering quite a lot from it. They need a lot of support right now, and I can give some - but what do I do when they *may* be expressing paranoid delusions about non-existent risks to their safety? [more inside]
posted by RajahKing at 9:14 AM PST - 14 comments

Occult detectives, detecting the occult

Recommend me your stories of occult detection! Assume that I have read the more familiar ones, alas. [more inside]
posted by Frowner at 9:03 AM PST - 17 comments

How can I instill dill thrill?

I don't particularly enjoy the taste of either parsley or dill, but thanks to my aerogarden starter kit I have a bounty of both. What uber-awesome recipes (or recipes that don't taste overwhelmingly parsley/dill-y) might just change my mind? [more inside]
posted by mosst at 9:00 AM PST - 23 comments

Tips for Sharing a Car Short-Term

My mom's car is in the shop for a few weeks, and she will need to share mine. The problem is that we don't live together (we're a couple miles apart) and our schedules have a lot of overlap, so we both want/need the car at the same time but never to go to the same places. Any tips for how to handle this in a way that maximizes convenience for both of us? [more inside]
posted by rue72 at 7:35 AM PST - 10 comments

Post-Brexit air travel: to book, or not to book?

I will need to fly from the EU to the US in April. Is it a good idea to book my usual route, which includes a transit stop in the UK, or is it better to find a different route that avoids Britain entirely? [more inside]
posted by myotahapea at 7:20 AM PST - 8 comments

Google+ brand pages?

Hi! I have a Google+ (or Google Plus) brand page. I know Google+ for consumers is going away but what happens to brand pages? I can't find anything explaining what to expect. I had a notification in my brand account earlier this week that I accidentally closed! So I'm not sure what they were trying to tell me. I haven't gotten any communication from Google about the G+ brand page. Can anyone link to what will happen to brand pages after Google Plus shuts down?
posted by puckupdate at 5:52 AM PST - 8 comments

keyboard case for 9.7 inch ipad

The keyboard case I've been using with my ipad (9.7", 2017; plain, not Pro) is dying. Help me find a cheap replacement. [more inside]
posted by needs more cowbell at 5:46 AM PST - 1 comment

February 7

So what's Kent WA like these days?

I just got a job in Kent, WA, so need to move to that general area before the end of the month. I grew up in Western Washington, and I remember Kent always having something of a negative reputation. I imagine that, if this was ever accurate, it has changed somewhat in the intervening 15 years. So what's Kent like these days? [more inside]
posted by lordcorvid at 11:58 PM PST - 7 comments

Huzzah! I'm a published writer! Now what?

I've been writing short stories and flash fiction on a blog for three years now. I've been published in several literary magazines. One of them even nominated me for the Pushcart Prize! What are my prospects from here? [more inside]
posted by Senza Volto at 10:39 PM PST - 9 comments

What drink should I order at a wedding open bar?

I’ll be going to an open bar, black tie wedding this weekend. I always get flustered when ordering and end up just asking for a vodka coke/cranberry or one thing equally simple. What should I be ordering to take advantage of a nice open bar that won’t be a total pain in the ass for the bar tender? [more inside]
posted by raccoon409 at 9:49 PM PST - 36 comments

My Paragard is...stuck. What should I expect next?

My Paragard IUD has reached the end of its lifespan, but it's not ready to leave just yet. [more inside]
posted by Vervain at 9:19 PM PST - 8 comments

Using the extra buttons on a Japanese keyboard

I'd like to use the extra buttons on my Japanese keyboard which has been mapped to an US setting. [more inside]
posted by Hactar at 8:57 PM PST - 2 comments

We cannot manage to clean our cat's ears

We are brand new pet owners. Complete novices. Our new cat's ears need to be cleaned twice a day for two weeks. It's been three days and we have not managed to do it a single time. This is AP pet ownership and I am totally out of my depth. [more inside]
posted by Vic Morrow's Personal Vietnam at 8:01 PM PST - 20 comments

Are productivity techniques copyrighted or patented?

There are tons of "hacks" to increase your productivity out on the web. If, say, you made an app employing any of these techniques (or a video showing how to use them), are you infringing on a copyright? Do you need permission to use these from the creator if your product earns sales or any money from these techniques? [more inside]
posted by neeta at 7:15 PM PST - 5 comments

It's like my own personal climate change

My body is terrible at regulating temperature. What can I do to not constantly be caught between heat waves and polar vortexes? [more inside]
posted by brook horse at 6:49 PM PST - 12 comments

Heated bicycle gloves?

I have poor circulation in my fingers. Even gloves rated as very-wintery leave my fingers in pain, assuming they don't just go straight numb (and then the pain comes later when they warm up). This can't be good for me. I don't want to do disposable handwarmers. There seem to be a lot of heated motorcycle gloves, but many of these want to plug into a system of some kind? I don't see a lot about heated gloves for bicycling. What are my options? How can I keep my hands warm on long commutes? They do not need to be waterproof, but that's a plus.
posted by curious nu at 6:47 PM PST - 20 comments

Should we buy an ozone generator?

We recently bought a house and are preparing to move in next Friday. Until then, we're trying to eradicate a musty/moldy/old cat pee smell in the basement, where two bedrooms are located. An ozone generator seems like a good option for blasting away these things/smells, but it's hard to get a sense for how effective it'd be, or how dangerous. Or if there are other air purifiers we should use instead. [more inside]
posted by witchen at 6:38 PM PST - 9 comments

Can I eat this?: 10 hr melted ice cream

Can I eat this?: Frozen quart of Tillamook Marionberry Pie ice cream, left in a 66 degree room for 10 hours, then put into freezer. I assume it was thoroughly melted, but I didn't open it.
posted by clseace at 5:59 PM PST - 10 comments

My group wants to fund but not administer a scholarship/grant

A professional organization I'm involved with wants to fund a scholarship/grant for college students studying to go into our field. We don't want to deal with administering it and are happy to pay to have somebody else who knows what they're doing manage it. How can we do this? Is there a scholarship administration company you'd recommend? [more inside]
posted by handknit 100% merino at 5:38 PM PST - 13 comments

What to do with my downloaded JSON files from Flickr?

I want to re-upload 32,000 images to my Flickr Pro account, but I don't know how to save the information (tags, title, description) contained in the corresponding JSON files. Can someone explain to me if this is possible, and if so, how? [more inside]
posted by blueberry at 5:08 PM PST - 3 comments

What happens if you actually listen to a scam call?

So today I picked up an unknown number with a local area code (I rarely do this, but every once in a while I feel the need to take a sample and see if they're still all scams) and was treated to a lovely recorded message by Amy From The Healthcare Center. (My coworker got one earlier today about his extended auto warranty.) I am fully aware that this is a scam, but it got me wondering: if I hadn't hung up, what would have happened next? [more inside]
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 4:53 PM PST - 8 comments

Need resources for a woman leaving her husband in GA

A female friend is in the process of separating from and divorcing her husband and doesn't know where to begin. Can you recommend resources (she's in the Atlanta suburbs) that can help her understand the process, give her support, and make sure she comes out of this whole? She particularly needs, but doesn't think she can afford, a lawyer. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 3:20 PM PST - 10 comments

How worried should I be about my wife traveling to London March 27-30th?

Aunt is supposed to attend a business conference in London on the 27th and 28th of March and then Brexit happens and I'm worried bad things will happen. [more inside]
posted by Uncle at 2:57 PM PST - 4 comments

Disorganized freelance client and not enough hours

I've been working for a freelance client remotely for a few years, and lately it's not working that well. I like the work, but the overarching problem is that she (an entrepreneur) is pretty disorganized, which is affecting my workload and enabling my own bad habits. Note: We live in different states. How can I help fix this situation? [more inside]
posted by trillian at 2:07 PM PST - 13 comments

Help me Kondo my computer.

My tragic flaw: I have never backed up my personal laptop, save everything to Desktop or Download and now am overwhelmed by the idea of organizating it. I have Dropbox. Where do I begin? Help me organize and backup my computer(s). (I have laptops stretching back to 2001 in a box.) tl;dr - How do you organize your computer files and how do you continue to organize new files?
posted by melodykramer at 1:28 PM PST - 15 comments

Bf of 7.5 years says he will propose this year

I was excited to hear he was interested in proposing this year. I shared my excitement on a wedding/engagement/relationship forum and everyone felt like this was a stalling tactic they've seen with many men and that 'this year' is too vague. Is this true? Is this often a stalling tactic? It saddened me to hear feedback that I needed a more definite timeline and that they said he seemed not interested. I know they're just strangers but if they see this is common, maybe it is true. Maybe I need to ask him for a more determined timeline like "spring" or "before x month" Thoughts? [more inside]
posted by Asian_Hunnie at 1:18 PM PST - 71 comments

Like David Rose, but less money

I'm looking for ways to dress more like David Rose (character on Schitts Creek) or Dan Levy, but on ... not the budget of the show. Ideally every piece would be below $100, but I have no idea how ridiculous that is. I am also open to the idea of sewing or modifying my own stuff. [more inside]
posted by freezer cake at 12:58 PM PST - 4 comments

Is it wrong to use the phrase "up to" and then not just state the max?

So there is a commercial airing that says people who take the pill can lose "up to an average of 12 pounds." I also hear possible savings described as "up to 5-10 percent" quite often. If I said "up to" I would only state the maximum possible and not a range or an average. Are these just sloppy sentences or is there something I am missing?
posted by soelo at 12:58 PM PST - 19 comments

Dinner Ideas in Downtown LA

I'm taking my mother to the Broad museum downtown on Saturday - any recommendations for a good place to eat dinner? Nothing too fancy, we're pretty open on kinds of food.
posted by InfidelZombie at 12:42 PM PST - 10 comments

I Need Examples of Book Covers with People Falling

I am gathering examples of book covers with people falling, or in mid-air. This seems to have been a trend in book cover design in recent years. Thanks in advance!
posted by Sully at 12:37 PM PST - 20 comments

Fast, good-enough sticker printing

Can you recommend a good sticker printing service? I'm looking to print 200-300 stickers, cut-to-size or sheet, to arrive by Feb 20th. The stickers would be a circle (2 inch diameter) and would ideally be water resistant. [more inside]
posted by spamandkimchi at 12:17 PM PST - 7 comments

sympathy cards that don't suck

I'm looking to create sympathy cards with very little text on them. Think the type of card you would stick with a bouquet to gift someone grieving. All the cards i find online are terrible looking, with even worse text on them. What would you suggest/would have liked to receive yourself, beyond the common "with deepest sympathy" or "words are never enough" ? [more inside]
posted by PardonMyFrench at 12:04 PM PST - 12 comments

Why can't I cry about this knee surgery even though I feel like crying?

I had knee surgery 4 weeks ago and though frequently feeling on the verge of tears, can't seem to have a good old cry. Why? And any ideas to get me going? [more inside]
posted by Jenny'sCricket at 11:57 AM PST - 13 comments

Seeking planner to spark joy ⚡️

I’m deliberately cutting down on my sponcon and other advertising content but as a consequence when I really do want some dorky inspiring thing I don’t know where to look. Do you have a recommendation for a day planner that is functional and makes you feel, uh, cool? [more inside]
posted by stoneandstar at 11:55 AM PST - 13 comments

Can a non-believer convert to Judaism?

I was raised non-religiously in a nominally Catholic family, but I've never believed in God. However, I went to college at a Jewish university, my ex-husband was Jewish, my social circle is predominately Jewish, and my current boyfriend is Jewish. I've been Jewish-adjacent for decades. When I married my ex, I didn't convert because of the atheism thing. But my boyfriend asked me to marry him yesterday, and this loud, clear voice in my head boomed "you should convert." But can I? [more inside]
posted by Neely O'Hara at 11:01 AM PST - 24 comments

Is this comma really necessary?

I am working on a text for school, and one of my professors is adamant that I should use a comma between what she calls a "parenthetical gerund phrase" (or something) and the verb. I hate this comma with a passion because it looks horrible and feels wrong. However I am not a native English speaker so I am not super confident about this. Is this comma really a thing? (Examples, after, clicking). [more inside]
posted by Tarumba at 10:51 AM PST - 46 comments

Academic articles on Woolf's A Room of One's Own, Shakespeare's Sister?

I am trying to find academic articles on highlighting why Woolf's A Room of One's Own, Chapter 3, Shakespeare's Sister, is important for creative female writers, literary scholars, and/or literary communities in general. [more inside]
posted by RearWindow at 9:43 AM PST - 5 comments

Solo online / PC games with a vintage, paper RPG or board-game feel?

I'm looking for recommendations of current solo games that have a strong whiff of vintage RPG or boardgaming in their mechanics, art, and pace. [more inside]
posted by ryanshepard at 8:35 AM PST - 20 comments

Partner wants to logic his way through our relationship

My partner has very high expectations of people and expects them to be consistent all of the time. Are you like this, or are you in a relationship like this? How do you successfully communicate and move past disagreements? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 8:34 AM PST - 65 comments

Celebrity White Dress Identification

Watching this week's Project Runway reminded me of a dress that was similar in construction to one of the designer's dresses. Both dresses in question had diamond shaped cutouts at the midriff with knots or twists to help form the diamond shapes. This dress from Lulu's is a similar style. [more inside]
posted by Fuego at 8:13 AM PST - 3 comments

Help Me Pick Games and Accessories for a Playstation 4

My sons (age 14 and 11) have convinced me to buy a Playstation 4 for the family. I am probably going to buy the Spider-Man bundle (but could be convinced to buy a different version). What I am really looking to know is what games should I get to start with, and what accessories do I need? [more inside]
posted by bove at 8:01 AM PST - 23 comments

why did my sweaters srink?

I put them in cold water woolen cycle. [more inside]
posted by fantasticness at 7:56 AM PST - 13 comments

Help me fatten my beloved

I am giving my SO the Valentine's Day gift of a month's worth of home baking. However, my baking knowledge extends to and ends with apple crumble. The SO loves chocolate, so the two challenges are a) ease and b) chocolate or so delicious it doesn't matter that chocolate isn't in it. Cookies, brownies, maybe I could pull off a cake or breads, anything! Hope me and thank you!
posted by angrycat at 7:32 AM PST - 28 comments

iPad apps that bring you joy (and productivity!)

This "I love this iPhone app" question, but for iPads! [more inside]
posted by Stevia Agave at 7:22 AM PST - 9 comments

Super low-maintenance easy nail polish hacks?

Can I apply nail polish to just the tips of my nails? Alternately: Is there any nail care routine I can follow that takes very minimal maintenance to keep lasting? [more inside]
posted by Cozybee at 7:07 AM PST - 10 comments

Awesome conference or training?

My work has some money this year to send me to a conference or training within the US. Are there any fun or useful ones people can recommend? Fields can range from cool methods trainings, social sciences, tech, youth, fed policy, consumer behavior, logistics.... if it’s something really interesting or that you’ve enjoyed, I can spin it!
posted by inevitability at 6:52 AM PST - 4 comments

Financial blogs/forums for the Prius millionaire

I’m looking for blogs/communities for “regular” wealthy people. [more inside]
posted by myaskme at 6:19 AM PST - 14 comments

Torn between two houses

I'm house hunting. I've seen eight of them so far, and I'm getting to a point where I feel the need to make a final decision, no takebacks. I want a house for the sake of having a house at this point but I also want a house that adds to my overall financial health (good resale value, the type of house I can rent out, etc.) I am a single person with no kids looking for a two-bedroom starter home on a relatively low income. [more inside]
posted by coffeeand at 6:16 AM PST - 24 comments

Can you recommend books in the vein of Sexual Politics by Kate Millett?

Books that examine authors through a critical feminist lens, either in favor of or against their work?
posted by Phyltre at 6:08 AM PST - 2 comments

UK builder's mistake; what are my rights, and any advice?

We live in the UK. We're getting our bathroom in our house (which we own) substantially redone - this involved structural work in the floor, knocking out walls, etc and an all new design. It's a big job, and expensive. TL;DR: almost done, figured out they screwed something up under the floor and it looks like they have to redo it from scratch. [more inside]
posted by Philosopher Dirtbike at 1:36 AM PST - 8 comments

February 6

Gift ideas needed

What's a good gift to help a friend celebrate, and care for herself, during a long-anticipated but uncertain transition in her life? [more inside]
posted by escape from the potato planet at 9:00 PM PST - 12 comments

Qué bola? Jamar un cable.

Cuban friend in Peru seeking asylum in US. How can I help? [more inside]
posted by Mike Mongo at 8:12 PM PST - 1 comment

Help me remember a book

My library doesn't keep records of what I've checked out (good), but when I try to remember a book I read to see if the author has anything else, I'm out of luck. More of the book I'm trying to remember inside [more inside]
posted by k5.user at 7:06 PM PST - 2 comments

Coworker communication causing consternation

One of my coworkers in my new workplace has a communication style that I find absolutely exhausting. He is, by all accounts, a perfectly decent person, but I come out of every conversation with him (and even sometimes conversations I'm not part of - if I'm overhearing something elsewhere in the office, etc) with my muscles tense, pulse racing, and feeling bad because I did not express myself as well as I could have. How do I deal? [more inside]
posted by btfreek at 7:05 PM PST - 16 comments

I am looking for a fast and cheap way to have an NDA reviewed...

But the options that I've found are neither of those things. I have been offered a short freelance gig but in order to start work I will need to sign an NDA. I would rather not sign anything, even a seemingly basic NDA, without knowing what the risks are. [more inside]
posted by JackT at 7:05 PM PST - 5 comments

Popular, Recent Genre Novels written in Deep POV/Free Indirect Discourse

Specifically, I'm looking for modern genre examples. Not Austen, not Flaubert, but popular novels published within the last ten years, preferably in 3rd Person. I've read lots of book about Deep POV, but I've been unable to find many modern novels written using it. Help!
posted by Chasuk at 6:41 PM PST - 6 comments

The Borrowers, The Littles, The …?

I like books about tiny “people.” I particularly like when they live alongside or under the noses of humans. There must be people writing these books now as with YA or adult reads, especially with the growth of urban fantasy. Are there books or series or authors you can recommend? [more inside]
posted by OmieWise at 6:03 PM PST - 28 comments

Bi signal

How does one present as bi? [more inside]
posted by Sterros at 5:39 PM PST - 20 comments

Show recommendations please (Hulu and Amazon Prime)

Amazingly, I seem to have caught up on all the shows I wanted to watch, but there must be more! [more inside]
posted by madonna of the unloved at 5:05 PM PST - 32 comments

How to not take advantage of your service sub

Kinkfilter: What's the line between having a satisfied service sub and taking advantage of them for free labor? [more inside]
posted by divabat at 4:36 PM PST - 11 comments

Are phone books disappearing?

The librarian said they didn't have a phone book and "that's all online now." Is this common? Are phone books disappearing? [more inside]
posted by sitecoach at 4:15 PM PST - 23 comments

Setting prices for used household items for sale

Just that simple. Those of you who have experience with selling things on Craigslist/NextDoor, etc, how do you come up with an asking price? Algebraic formula, gut instinct, throwing darts at a bull’s eye? Any guidance you can give would be appreciated, as well as any other secrets to your Craigslist success.
posted by SweetTeaAndABiscuit at 4:02 PM PST - 7 comments

Stomp Stomp Clap

Was the "stomp stomp clap" rhythm a thing prior to "We Will Rock You" by Queen? Are there any pre-Queen songs or other performances that use it? Thanks.
posted by BeeDo at 4:00 PM PST - 6 comments

Podcasts and YouTubers - Find my older (queer?) woman inspiration

I'm falling in love with the host of Dinner Party Tonight on YouTube. She's strong, she's funny, she's edgy, and she confidently teaches you a bunch of great stuff about cooking. I'm looking for other podcasts and YouTube series with similar hosts. Does not need to be cooking-related. [more inside]
posted by 3491again at 2:41 PM PST - 9 comments

Do-it-yourself plumbing repair?

Is it possible to perform a do-it-yourself plumbing repair on pipes leading to street? [more inside]
posted by ragtimepiano at 2:34 PM PST - 11 comments

Living with intention

I just downloaded Siempo and it's great. It's helped me realize how challenging it is to balance my relationship to technology. I don't consider myself addicted or anything, but I miss.... being offline. I'm old enough to remember the days before the internet, and I miss them. Though I'm not looking to quit the internet just yet, I think books on the subject of reconnecting and living intentionally would be helpful. Here's one example. Any others you'd suggest? If not a book, is there a habit or exercise that you find restorative?
posted by onecircleaday at 2:26 PM PST - 8 comments

My knee has a specific, superficial-feeling pain.

YANMD, TINMA. For the past few days, I've had an occasional sensation on the lower outside of my leg slightly below my right knee which feels like a skin "tightness" or surface abrasion, like a rugburn. But it's not. [more inside]
posted by jackbishop at 2:08 PM PST - 3 comments

More like adverti$ement am I right

Is US Cellular running an ad featuring a Windows phone right now? Someone told me they are running an ad with a Microsoft-branded phone, meaning they are selling the discontinued Lumia, right? Has anyone seen something like this? It’d have been on TV or Hulu. Their website has some Windows Mobile stuff but I can’t tell how recent it is. I’m trying to confirm or deny hazy second-hand information.
posted by michaelh at 2:00 PM PST - 3 comments

How do I open old Eudora .mbx files in Win10?

I'm trying to find a way to open Eudora's mailbox files (.mbx) and am very suspicious of the results I get. Anyone know of a viewer that isn't just a malware repository? [more inside]
posted by ClarissaWAM at 1:59 PM PST - 3 comments

Knee brace that doesn't compress and looks decent under clothes?

My doctor gave me instructions to purchase a patellar stabilizing brace (online, to save me money). Is there an alternative brace that accomplishes the same biomechanical goal (and is unobtrusive i.e. very low profile) without compressing too much? [more inside]
posted by cotton dress sock at 1:47 PM PST - 2 comments

Looking for Pierre Franey’s Curry Powder recipe

As it says. I remember making his curry powder and it was honestly the best. I was sure it was in one of the 60-Minute Gourmet books, but I don’t see it there. Any help?
posted by Gusaroo at 12:36 PM PST - 2 comments

Satellite photography book

Instagram is full of amazing satellite photography, especially of urban centers, monuments, landscape engineering, so where are the satellite photography books ? Not interested in just nature photography.
posted by Jason and Laszlo at 12:17 PM PST - 5 comments

Love triangle filter: am I being a bad friend?

I met a guy through an old friend, and we hit it off. Trouble is, he and my friend have a bit of history, and now she doesn't want to talk to me. Snowstorm inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 12:11 PM PST - 37 comments

I was happier 4 years ago. How can I get my groove back?

Some of you remember my awful relationship posts. Well, things are better. We aren't fighting, and when we do fight it's over quickly. My partner is meeting more of my needs more of the time, emotionally and domestically. But I am so run down. More after the cut. [more inside]
posted by crunchy potato at 11:15 AM PST - 13 comments

Unpredictable computer freezing options?

I have a Dell Inspiron 13 7375 (AMD Ryzen 5) running Windows 10. It works very well in general, but occasionally freezes completely. when I say freeze, I mean it ceases responding to any input, completely and instantly. [more inside]
posted by Rock Steady at 11:07 AM PST - 8 comments

Help me identify an obscure 50s/60s sci-fi movie?

This was an amusing little B-movie on a rainy weekend when I was a kid, but I have only one really specific memory by which to search for it. [more inside]
posted by el_lupino at 10:57 AM PST - 9 comments

When is good enough?

For the first time in my life, I have a decent, well-paying job... but when can I leave? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 10:12 AM PST - 15 comments

Strip Club Aftermath

I had my bachelorette party last weekend. It was a ton of fun and my friends organized an incredible night out. However, we went to the strip club and ever since I've felt this intense, surging embarrassment and a sense of "trauma" associated with the event. [more inside]
posted by raintree at 10:09 AM PST - 19 comments

Do you have any good strategies for not getting sick on rollercoasters?

I love rollercoasters, and am planning an amusement park road trip with my son that is built around riding a whole bunch of them. But in my middle age I have started to get motion sickness from riding. It's the standard queasiness and bellyache stuff, where I feel like I'm gonna barf and then can't eat afterward. The internet suggests that Sea-Bands or Dramamine or [insert miracle cure] all work great, and simultaneously that none of them work at all. Do you have a strategy/regimen that has helped you keep riding?
posted by AgentRocket at 9:51 AM PST - 16 comments

Kdrama about cheating on tests

I saw a scene from a kdrama where the students make a complicated plan to cheat on a math test and it involves a seating chart and swapping papers in a specific order. [more inside]
posted by spunweb at 9:50 AM PST - 2 comments

CareCredit vs. Prosper - which is better?

I am looking to have a procedure that is not covered by my insurance policy. I'll be self pay, but will likely need credit or a loan for the remaining amount. Looking for people who have experience using Care Credit or Prosper. [more inside]
posted by Sara_NOT_Sarah at 9:47 AM PST - 9 comments

Car dealership messed up - what do I do to resolve this?

The car dealership sold us our 2015 Subaru Forester with the wrong size tires, with a remote starter installed (that we didn't know about) - but without the fob - and lastly, with illegal tinting. I have this information and now I have to go back to them and...ask them to do what? [more inside]
posted by kitcat at 9:29 AM PST - 26 comments

Buy me a Shower Curtain

I have a boring grey and white bathroom with white marble floors. I bought these cabinet knobs to jazz things up. What shower curtain should I get to go along with them? The only other decor in the room is photography from a trip to Tunisia so I guess I'm going for a Mediterranean or Moroccan type thing. [more inside]
posted by something something at 8:29 AM PST - 12 comments

Elastics wreaking havoc on braces

My teeth are all messed up since we added elastics to my braces a few days ago. Please tell me your stories of similar orthodontic disaster. [more inside]
posted by CoureurDubois at 7:22 AM PST - 8 comments

I need a new oven, I guess

My oven just bit the dust. How do I buy a new oven? What do I look for? Are there any that you especially recommend? Are they all pretty much the same unless you go super high end or super low end? Help me, Metafilter. Additional questions and criteria within! [more inside]
posted by A Terrible Llama at 7:17 AM PST - 18 comments

Finding owner of stray dog near Ontario Oregon?

I'm from DC and am visiting my dad in eastern Oregon (Baker City) for a few days. On the drive from Boise airport I stopped at a truck stop just west of Ontario (Fruitvale?) and found a shivering skinny pup who looks like a Chihuahua mix. Any ideas on finding his people? [more inside]
posted by Cocodrillo at 7:08 AM PST - 4 comments

What's it like to transition to teaching high school after academia?

I teach adjunct at a great university, but yeah, well, adjunct. I found a job listing recently at a nice private school for a high school/middle school journalism teacher. I'd love thoughts on what this might be like or if it would be a good fit. [more inside]
posted by heavenknows at 7:06 AM PST - 9 comments

When baby sleep becomes a battle.

Our lovely 3 month old hates to go to sleep. I mean, she really HATES it. But sleeptime (both naps and bedtime) is becoming more and more of an ordeal and I’m slowly losing it. Please hope me. Wall of text of info inside. [more inside]
posted by like_neon at 6:48 AM PST - 47 comments

Illustrator embeds font that has been converted to paths?

When generating a PDF, why would Adobe Illustrator still embed a font that has been completely converted to paths? [more inside]
posted by Thorzdad at 6:36 AM PST - 3 comments

International Shipping for Pamphlets

So my Kickstarter was funded, but now there is a growing demand for international shipping for the physical rewards. The USPS reps I've spoken to have been less than helpful and I've not received a consistent answer as to what constitutes a 'Package' and 'Large Envelope' - but I have a plan so cunning you can exsanguinate a cow with it that I'd like to run by you, especially people familiar with the Royal Mail... [more inside]
posted by robocop is bleeding at 5:41 AM PST - 6 comments

How to deal with a family member when upset?

What I am most concerned about is limiting what harm I can do to the people around me when I get into a state. In a lot of ways I am poorly equipped for it. One person in particular keeps wandering into my vicinity when I'm upset and they are often collateral damage. [more inside]
posted by quiet bayleef at 4:37 AM PST - 11 comments

Latin carries more weight

A powerlifiting podcast I'm listening to has a motto I'd like to translate into latin. Can the linguistic hive help out or know where to turn? [more inside]
posted by monocultured at 4:28 AM PST - 6 comments

Visiting Israel during Shauvot

I’ll be in Israel during Shauvot this June and am wondering whether there’s anything special I might need to know about visiting at this time. [more inside]
posted by mdonley at 4:27 AM PST - 1 comment

Link for "Ring the Bell" video with postal worker?

I have failed in finding a video link for a video in the Indian "Ring the Bell" anti-violence campaign that features a postal worker. It has been recommended. Is your google-fu stronger than mine?
posted by pompomtom at 1:56 AM PST - 3 comments

February 5

Unstink my coats

I bought two coats yesterday. This is great news apart from one thing: they smell very strongly of the store I bought them from, and it's not a neutral smell. What are my options for getting the smell out of these coats? [more inside]
posted by terretu at 11:13 PM PST - 12 comments

I Lost Your Cat

My housemate's cat ran out of the house as I was taking the recycling out. I tried finding it but no luck. How do I handle this? [more inside]
posted by morning_television at 10:29 PM PST - 27 comments

What might be some reasonable ways to alleviate my partner's insecurity?

Partner's past experiences have contributed to a specific insecurity which we are unable to resolve. Details follow. [more inside]
posted by satipatthana at 9:57 PM PST - 23 comments

Therapist in Western Maryland or thereabouts?

I know mefites love their therapy. I've never tried it before, but am strongly considering it. The only way I can hack it is to find the exact special snowflake I would need in order to be able to be that vulnerable, and in order to feel better instead of worse. [more inside]
posted by nirblegee at 7:30 PM PST - 3 comments

Does the last paragraphs of a cover letters ever not sound insincere?

So two years ago you all gave me advice on a job search, now I'm looking for advice on a search for a better job. The thing is, I despise cover letters - even the examples I find on line of "spectacular" cover letters seem like they have one foot in insincere and the other in insipid. But I'm slogging through and I'm to that last paragraph...and everything I type seems awful to me. Tell me about the cover letter that sang to you. Help me stop overthinking this plate of beans.
posted by Sid and Marty Krofft's HR Sockpuppet at 7:18 PM PST - 12 comments

Is this flirting?

I had a night out with some coworkers recently and I'm wondering whether I was being flirted with by one of them. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 5:54 PM PST - 21 comments

Our contractor is arguing with me about tile choice; is he right?

I've picked out a glass tile for our bathroom that I'm pretty in love with. The contractor at first complained because it was more difficult to install, and now is claiming that because our house is built on unstable soil that we can expect a catastrophic failure at some point. Does he have a point? [more inside]
posted by kittyloop at 4:07 PM PST - 12 comments

Care and feeding of your Chilhuacle pepper

I have identified my mystery mole pepper- it's a Chilhuacle negro! Great! Only the wiki page for the pepper is in Italian, and most other pages about it are in Spanish. I know it's a Mexican mole pepper, and mine seems to have become a perennial. How do I care for it so that I can get good sized peppers this summer and fall? [more inside]
posted by Homo neanderthalensis at 3:51 PM PST - 3 comments

No-tech secrets?

What are your day-to-day no-tech life tips? I'm looking for things like the knuckle rule for cooking rice, or that the perfect amount of salad dressing is just enough to coat the serving bowl. There must be lots of these things--incredibly straightforward and always foolproof. Can be cooking related or not; super low-tech, like using the mesh bag that onions come in to scrub pans, is also okay!
posted by stillmoving at 3:08 PM PST - 35 comments

Fairly splitting shared expenses

My partner and I are discussing the idea of me moving in to the home he owns (yay!), and we've started talking about finances. Can you help us figure out options for splitting costs fairly, given big differences in our means and how we will use the space? Any tips for managing shared expenses in our situation? [more inside]
posted by deus ex machina at 2:40 PM PST - 26 comments

My new job isn’t working out.

I recently started a job with an organization that isn’t great. What should I do, and how do I tell my references? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:20 PM PST - 7 comments

What do you call this kind of mattress pad and can you help me find one?

I'm looking for the kind of cheapo mattress pad that's just a rectangle of flat quilted cotton with loops of elastic on the corners. I want it to protect my featherbed without squishing it the way I think one with the full elasticated skirt would. What the heck is my search term and where can I find one in double/full size? Maybe they're not even made any more? So frustrated!
posted by HotToddy at 12:23 PM PST - 13 comments

Can you recommend to me a good, professional career counselor?

Exactly that. I'm seeking recommendations for a career counselor. I'd like to find someone who does not confine their work to any geographical area and is experienced and professional. I know that a professional expects to get paid and I expect to pay for their services. [more inside]
posted by grounded at 12:11 PM PST - 1 comment

Skating the Rideau Canal this weekend (and what to do if I can't)

I have plans to be in Ottawa this weekend so that I can skate the length of the Rideau Canal. So I was very dismayed to see that the entire canal is closed today. What are the chances that I'll be ice skating this weekend? What should I do if I can't? [more inside]
posted by GalaxieFiveHundred at 12:09 PM PST - 8 comments

Dinner Party - How do I make it a success?

I'm hosting my first ever dinner party this weekend. It's for 10 people and I'm a good planner and a good cook. I've taken many tips from Ina Garten about how to host a good dinner party; I'll be doing an easy, make ahead appetizer with some home made but also store bought elements. I've got an easy but show stopping main course that won't require too much cooking in the moment and a dessert I can make the day before but.... [more inside]
posted by JenThePro at 11:56 AM PST - 23 comments

Surrendering baby for adoption in CA without father's "consent"

Unmarried 21F eight months pregnant wants to give baby up for adoption. Uninvolved father won't "consent" to the process...what now? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 11:17 AM PST - 11 comments

Is there such a thing as a cheap, one person, highway capable vehicle?

I've got a commute of about 16 miles on the highway to get to work, and I'd really rather not buy a second full size car. But other than motorcycles (which I'm too cowardly to even contemplate, even leaving aside the weather), there doesn't appear to be anything on the market that fills the niche of a cheap, one person, highway vehicle. [more inside]
posted by sotonohito at 10:55 AM PST - 28 comments

Seeking more of that "ACS: Assassination of Gianni Versace" aesthetic

I like my movies to be more like stylish music videos. What else should I check out? Examples within. [more inside]
posted by lovableiago at 10:45 AM PST - 35 comments

Help me smell like a man

I am a woman, and I want to use men's cologne or scent. I like scents designed/marketed for men better than those for women, but I don't want to have to buy all the colognes to find the right one, and I hate shopping in person. I like a woodsy scent -- right now I am in love with the Tom's of Maine Deep Forest Men's Deodorant, but the scent fades by mid-day and is not very nuanced. I'd like to find something woodsy, spicy, cedar-y, and masculine, without smelling like Irish Spring or generically perfume-y. [more inside]
posted by OrangeDisk at 10:30 AM PST - 50 comments

Help find this 1990's comic book please.

I remember reading a fairly adult horror comic in the 90's that I would love to find again. [more inside]
posted by Cosine at 9:39 AM PST - 4 comments

Could We Move The Office, Boss? Thanks

I'm in the midst of a job search and have a very promising lead for a job where the one and only problem I have with it is that the office is physically located in an ugly neighborhood. Help me get over my snootiness. [more inside]
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:36 AM PST - 24 comments

Crowdsourcing my retail therapy: would like to find this drinking glass

Hello everyone. I would like to find this glass: https://i.redd.it/7xp4p7jb6ds11.jpg. (Muffin top not needed.) Does it look familiar to anyone? I have tried the Google and not yet found it. It must be somewhere. I feel like I would be happier with it (x8). Thanks!
posted by theredpen at 9:25 AM PST - 4 comments

My relationship is going downhill due to poor communication

My boyfriend started out very sweet, engaged, excited, and involved but things have slowly devolved into silence, tension, lack of affection, and an inability to communicate despite how much reading and therapy and effort I'm trying to put in. I don't know what happened or how to give things one more attempt before throwing in the towel for good. [more inside]
posted by korrasamus at 8:42 AM PST - 41 comments


It is time to blast open butts. I am regret to inform you that this question is about poop. [more inside]
posted by poffin boffin at 7:15 AM PST - 25 comments

Idle thoughts about a pickup!

I, a country squire, have started to feel stifled by my Subaru Forester. I’ve started thinking that my next vehicle should be a light duty pickup. Am I right, given the uses and requirements inside? [more inside]
posted by Admiral Haddock at 5:57 AM PST - 32 comments

all about that bass

This is the year I will finally start to learn the bass guitar. I have been looking at used ones on Craigslist. Other than one that will stay tuned, what do I need to look for/stay away from? And amps?
posted by jtexman1 at 4:55 AM PST - 25 comments

We CAN handle the truth.

I'm considering having a truth and reconciliation/accountability conversation with someone. If you've participated in such a conversation, I'd like to hear from you. [more inside]
posted by Sheydem-tants at 3:08 AM PST - 8 comments

February 4

Tips on finding a chiropractor (during pregnancy)

I'm pregnant and interested in trying out a chiropractor. There are a good dozen or so who claim to specialize in pregnancy-related chiropractic work in my area. Any tips on finding a good one? Anything to watch out for? Thanks!
posted by slidell at 11:05 PM PST - 10 comments

A victim of my parents' whims

Do you know a good tax expert in Canada familiar with up to date IRS stuff for Americans who have never lived in the US? [more inside]
posted by miles1972 at 9:42 PM PST - 2 comments

How to get out of Circular Conversations?

Yesterday I was stuck in one for 20 plus minutes! A fellow volunteer was telling me how their previous session went and they repeated the same 5 sentences about 5 times each. I can't leave, I tried to change the subject and even bring in a third person to help, but they kept circling. I need tips on how to stop that in the future. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 7:45 PM PST - 17 comments

Risk averse parents who use emotional blackmail

Tomorrow night, I will be delivering several pieces of *big* news (happy, exciting news - for me, anyway!) to my parents. I’d prefer not to disclose too many specifics here at this time, but it’s the type of news any loving parent in a healthy relationship with their children would be overjoyed to hear. The problem? My parents are risk averse, suspicious people who use emotional blackmail when they’re personally uncomfortable with a decision one of their children has made. [more inside]
posted by nightrecordings at 5:20 PM PST - 35 comments

Help with rejecting unwanted advances

A younger relative (in her late 20s, but emotionally/mentally more like a teenager due to a mild disability) attends a weekly community group. An older man has started bringing her flowers and saying she is the only reason he attends the group meetings. Last week he asked for a kiss and she compromised with a hug although not really wanting too. My question is, can you think of some simple things she can say to him to firmly head off these advances? Ideally I will practise saying them with her so she feels confident. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 4:56 PM PST - 18 comments

Mobile service stopped working on smartphone. Fix it or forget it?

Last Monday night I installed some sort of update to my Android phone. Since then, I haven't had any mobile data or service. [more inside]
posted by megancita at 4:48 PM PST - 5 comments

Sublime travel without a car

What are the most beautiful places in America I can visit without a driver's license? [more inside]
posted by scarylarry at 4:42 PM PST - 19 comments

Lost Lion Latch-Hook? Replacement ideas needed

Any idea where I could get the pattern for Wonderart Lion Latch Hook Kit, 27" X 40" without re-buying the whole kit? [more inside]
posted by MCMikeNamara at 4:40 PM PST - 2 comments

Give me your favorite "power ballads" from the past 15 years!

I heard Mitski's "Your Best American Girl" recently and thought to myself - I really love the "power ballad" setup of this song, and I wish it would make a bigger comeback! On Wikipedia's entry for power ballad, the newest example is Velvet Revolver's "Fall to Pieces" (2004), which I remember hearing on both rock and Top 40 stations back then. Of course, power ballads had mostly fallen out of fashion by then from their '70s-'80s peak. So, what are your favorite "power ballads" from 2004 or later?
posted by Seeking Direction at 4:39 PM PST - 11 comments

Does pre-peeled shrimp always have weird texture?

I got a pound of pre-peeled shrimp yesterday and the texture is really weird. [more inside]
posted by monologish at 3:27 PM PST - 11 comments

Advice and Reading Recommendations for Starting a Small Biz/Restaurant

I am looking for some books to read and general advice for starting a small business/restaurant. [more inside]
posted by saul wright at 1:28 PM PST - 6 comments

Laptop doesn't charge unless i switch the outlet every time

I have a 4 years old Asus X751L laptop that charges just fine...until i turn it off. Then the only way for it to charge again is to switch the outlet. It's not the electricity issue, the same happens in multiple different buildings. It is very irritating because I tend to forget about it sometimes and it happens a lot that it just turns off with no warning - because it's empty. What should i look for? To change the battery, the charger? Any advice?
posted by Salicornia at 1:13 PM PST - 7 comments

Linux Bash - Write array contents to middle of existing file

Not sure if this is a failing in my Google-fu, a rare edge case, or if it's not really possible, but I'm trying to write a bash script that will write the full contents of an array into an arbitrary point in an existing file. [more inside]
posted by Nice Guy Mike at 12:43 PM PST - 16 comments

Book on economics for discussing stuff in the news

Difficulty level: I am not an idiot but I don't understand economics and have found superficial forays daunting. [more inside]
posted by Smearcase at 12:10 PM PST - 12 comments

Creative uses for land

We have a two-acre section of land in Northern CA, zone 9a. We want to do something other than just grow weeds on it. [more inside]
posted by goodsearch at 11:23 AM PST - 30 comments

Time Machine backup question 1

Can I back up my Macbook to an external drive that has other files on it, without affecting or erasing those files? I have a nice solid state external drive with plenty of room on it. Can I use it for a new Time Machine backup of about 300gb without hurting the files that are already saved to it? How to do it if possible, just put the backup in a new folder on the external drive?
posted by glasseyes at 11:19 AM PST - 6 comments

Wedding Planning: What can we stop worrying about?

Mefites who have planned a wedding: what elements do you wish you had worried less about, not spent (as much) money on, or skipped entirely? Alternatively, what are you glad you did de-prioritize? What do wish you had spent more money or time on? [more inside]
posted by amaire at 10:51 AM PST - 54 comments

Did I just blow my external drive?

pls help me find out if I can get these files back or not [more inside]
posted by fantasticness at 10:18 AM PST - 13 comments

Inbetween Days / In-between Days / In Between Days Covers or Samples

Today I listened to, for the first time to my knowledge, the apparently widespread and famous song by The Cure, In Between Days. I am intimately familiar with song, but I don't know why. The wiki doesn't list many popular culture appearances of the song, I'm a Paramore fan but I'm certain it's not their SirusXM cover. Why do I know it? [more inside]
posted by AnhydrousLove at 9:45 AM PST - 14 comments

Simple app to track arrival time for work and gym?

I'm trying to reinforce my morning routine, because I'm happier when I stick to it. I'm motivated by tracking. So I'm looking for a simple app where I can push the button to say "I'm here" and see my stats. Any ideas? [more inside]
posted by mercredi at 9:33 AM PST - 9 comments

Recommend me some puzzle books!

I recently found out about puzzle books and my partner and I completed The Librarian's Almanaq last month and loved it. Can you recommend more of the same please?! I know there is a sequel to that one on Kickstarter: Conjurer's Almanaq. We enjoyed the variety of puzzles it provided and just solving it together over a period of time (maybe like 5 or 6 evenings) and that it was a screen-free activity too. Whatcha got?
posted by atlantica at 8:18 AM PST - 4 comments

Am I helping or interfering with my friend's mental health care?

I encouraged a friend to seek treatment for ADHD. They did (yay!) But I'm not sure the therapist they've chosen is the right person, and now I don't know how far I should go in convincing them to see someone else. [more inside]
posted by azzurra at 7:18 AM PST - 15 comments

Cheapest way to keep a domain name—not actually use it

I had a personal website. I have a common name, so I used my first, middle, and last names as the url. I took the site down, but would like to keep the url—with a potential eye to launching it again in a few years, and for liability purposes (I don’t want my url to become a notorious site, since it is my f/m/l names). What’s the cheapest way to keep the url on ice, given that I don’t want actually want to host anything? Currently on Godaddy.
posted by Admiral Haddock at 5:50 AM PST - 14 comments

Fictional Character’s Clock Radio Playlist?

Groundhog Day and certain recent Netflix releases have me wanting to fine-tune my Spotify alarm playlist. I want to copy the nice people on the TV and what they woke up to; this should either be jarring enough to actually make me wake up or make me smile as I hit snooze. [more inside]
posted by RainyJay at 5:44 AM PST - 11 comments

February 3

Scanning printed numbers into Excel

I've been asked to copy ISBNs or similar identifying numbers from thousands of hard copy books, in to Excel. Is there an efficient way of doing this? I'm hoping for a technique that's easier than typing each number into a spreadsheet. For example, is there an app/device that will OCR selected text on a printed page (and exclude surrounding text)? Can the same app/device transfer the OCRed numbers in to a simple text/csv file - or directly in to Excel? [more inside]
posted by brushtailedphascogale at 11:58 PM PST - 12 comments

Organising sheet music

I'm trying to figure out how keep my sheet music organised. My folders look like this. Ideally I'd have them alphabetized, but then each time I add a new sheet, I'll have to shift everything else. The other option is just to put them in as they come and have a frequently updated table of contents up front. Just wondering if I'm missing a better solution. [more inside]
posted by miaow at 10:13 PM PST - 16 comments

Roof leak near gas flue pipe

2 and 1/2 year old roof leak around gas flue/pipe [more inside]
posted by ljs30 at 8:51 PM PST - 6 comments

Car purchase guidance before moving to Oregon

We are moving to Oregon in a few months! Please help me choose an appropriate vehicle for the Willamette Valley area. [more inside]
posted by tllaya at 7:51 PM PST - 17 comments

Stodgy, middle aged folks wondering how to do Carnivale in New Orleans?

My husband and I will be in New Orleans for five days including the weekend of February 23-24. How best to navigate the pre-Mardi Gras festivities to maximize your enjoyment when we are the type who prefer museums and jazz to drinking and crowds. What do we need to know about watching the parades? Also, for people who have already seen the famous tourist sites, what else do you recommend? [more inside]
posted by metahawk at 7:27 PM PST - 17 comments

Notify me if something from a film festival gets a wider release?

Some friends and I, in the US, very much want to watch the movie Esto no es Berlín/This Is Not Berlin, which apparently recently appeared at Sundance. None of us pay any attention to movies in general, we're just gay Mexican-art nerds who are excited about this one. ELI5 how to figure out when/whether it will get a wider release, and ideally how to get some kind of notification when that happens.
posted by nebulawindphone at 7:09 PM PST - 5 comments

Should I break up with my friend?

I am totally frustrated with my friend and I don't know if the source of my frustration is going to change. [more inside]
posted by mermily at 5:56 PM PST - 20 comments

Adjusting to major metro area after life in a college town?

I grew up on one coast, went to college in a rural town on the other, and am slowly but not particularly successfully readjusting to life not far from where I began. Snowflakes after the cut, I guess. [more inside]
posted by salientstars at 5:11 PM PST - 10 comments

Card deck probability distribution with reshuffles?

What is the probability distribution (??) of card deals in a deck if the deck is reshuffled before the end is reached? [more inside]
posted by muddgirl at 1:23 PM PST - 10 comments

What happened to my taxes?

I can't sort through the tax jargon, but did I get screwed by Trump's tax plan? [more inside]
posted by archimago at 1:11 PM PST - 20 comments

Another book or author name question

Help me find these laid back books please [more inside]
posted by BlueHorse at 12:44 PM PST - 4 comments

Looking for recommendations for a walking holiday?

One way we like to spend holidays while still getting exercise and not gaining weight is to do "walking holidays"; basically, the idea is doing moderate length hikes on foot every day, ideally traveling from one hotel/b&B to the next over several days, and a service both plans it and transfers your luggage for you so your daily pack is light. This has worked well for us for several UK vacations, Iceland, and more recently the Douro valley in Portugal, but I'm looking for recommendations for other places. [more inside]
posted by kaszeta at 12:18 PM PST - 29 comments

help, multiple people want to hang out with me

In my head, I'm still the kid who's always left out. In real life, people suddenly want to hang out with me. How do I handle freewheeling social-professional situations with nebulous plans and lots of unconnected social circles who want to hang out? [more inside]
posted by kutsushita nyanko at 12:07 PM PST - 3 comments

Scary / Spooky Podcasts for 9-year-old (and her Dad)

My young daughter and I discovered Scary Stories Told In the Dark and she LOVED it. It quickly turned into Our Thing where'd we'd listen together whenever on car rides. Unfortunately, some of the stories are not appropriate for her age -- course language, adult themes, or WAY TOO EXPLICITLY GORY -- and there's no warning given ahead of time that a particular episode might he one to skip. [more inside]
posted by armoir from antproof case at 11:44 AM PST - 9 comments

Tools for creating a free online alumni network thing

I'm about to finish up my grad program and my school doesn't have any way for alumni to find each other (my program is brand new and there's not a lot of infrastructure yet). So far, we've set up a Google doc where folks can add in whatever contact info they feel comfortable with, their academic interests, and any other relevant stuff. It is basically a list of people's personal emails and it gets the job done, but I feel like there's got to be something better out there. [more inside]
posted by forkisbetter at 11:24 AM PST - 5 comments

How early is too early for sax practice?

I play the saxophone and practice at home. It's a loud instrument, but so far none of my neighbors have complained and I'm hoping to stay on a friendly footing. So, what in the hive mind's opinion is the earliest time of day that no reasonable person would be likely to complain about sax practice, (a) on weekdays, (b) on weekends and holidays?
posted by zeri at 10:24 AM PST - 36 comments

Looking for a UHD or 4k Image of the Minneapolis,MN Skyline

I am looking for a UHD (3840x2160) or 4k (4096x2160 that I can crop) image of the Minneapolis,MN skyline that I can use as wallpaper on my computer... [more inside]
posted by TinWhistle at 9:05 AM PST - 5 comments

Computer meltdown due to stupid update

My desktop computer updated and now I can’t get it to start. [more inside]
posted by silverstatue at 8:07 AM PST - 19 comments

Any way to salvage an upholstered seat that's full of spilled milk?

Is there any way I can salvage a seat cushion that's full of milk? [more inside]
posted by saladin at 7:57 AM PST - 10 comments


How long does it take thioridazine to become effective? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 6:52 AM PST - 5 comments

Guest etiquette in a place you used to live

I'm anxious about meeting up with old friends in a place I used to live and would love some advice on how to have a great trip. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 6:52 AM PST - 8 comments

How do I Conference Like an Adult?

I'm going to a large (45k attendees) professional conference (HIMSS) the week after next, and I'm looking for some tips on how to make this a good experience. I have attended a lot of regional conferences and smaller national conferences, and I tend to feel like I am not getting max benefit out the them. Some of my questions: What is the best way to interact with vendors? Is it worthwhile to interact with vendors we already do business with? How do I meet new people without being weird? [more inside]
posted by jeoc at 6:33 AM PST - 9 comments

X marks the [literary] spot

For 2019, I'm doing an A-Z reading challenge (one book for each letter of the alphabet, all published in 2018). I'm having trouble coming up with some of the letters, particularly X -- I guess no one was writing about Xena Warrior Princess last year or something -- so I'm turning to the Hive Mind for help; open to suggestions for other books on the proposed list as well. Full list inside. [more inside]
posted by basalganglia at 5:47 AM PST - 8 comments

February 2

Philosophical arguments for staying or leaving the Trump administration

I’m not certain of the exact timeframe, but shortly after the 2016 election I read an article online reviewing the philosophical arguments for a conscientious person staying in a system they find to be harmful in an attempt to make it better versus leaving the system in protest because staying would make them complicit. While the premise was working in the Trump administration, the bulk of the article was situation-agnostic and discussed different philosopher’s opinions. My attempts to find this article have been in vain. Help me, Mefi!
posted by AaRdVarK at 7:47 PM PST - 2 comments

I think friend went in for a kiss but I want to know for sure

I've (26F) been hanging out with a new friend (~30F) once every couple of weeks since September. We knew each other online for maybe a couple of years before we met in person. We hung out last night and as we were hugging goodbye, I think she wanted to kiss, but I'd like to know for certain, mainly because I wouldn't be opposed to that possibility. [more inside]
posted by lilies.lilies at 7:44 PM PST - 34 comments

The Ugliest Street in America

It has been repeated in the Utah press that Norman Mailer, in The Executioner's Song, described state street in Orem, Utah as the ugliest street in America. Although undoubtedly true, I am unable to find Mailer doing anything other than describe the horror of state street, without using the phrase "ugliest street in America." Can you help me locate the text where Mailer says this, if it does exist?
posted by mecran01 at 7:01 PM PST - 2 comments

Utah Parks, Take 2

I'm planning a family road trip (two adults, 4 year old, 2 year old) to the less visited Southern Utah Parks. Looking for ideas and guidance! [more inside]
posted by tealcake at 6:36 PM PST - 7 comments

Looking for framework for writing my own web ToDo app

Not being happy with any ToDo app I've tried, I want to write my own web-based one. I have excellent development and database skills, but not a lot experience with the latest web application frameworks. What framework should I use? [more inside]
posted by ShooBoo at 5:50 PM PST - 7 comments

Is data visualization an option for freelancing?

After a lot of thought and a good bit of therapy, I'm starting the move from a standard office developer to a more freelance software career. This is a prospect I view with not a little trepidation, but it feels right. I've got at least a year (and maybe more) of building a portfolio, picking up side gigs, and starting to build a business. [more inside]
posted by cowcowgrasstree at 3:59 PM PST - 4 comments

I want the opposite of search engine optimization for my blog

I need to set up a blog and would like to avoid it being indexed by search engines. How can I accomplish this with minimal hassle and expense? [more inside]
posted by reren at 3:56 PM PST - 7 comments

What Tips/Advice do you have regarding a Reddit "Ask Me Me Anything"?

I am having a moment in the news, and I would like to do a Reddit "Ask Me Anything" / "I Am A". Do you have any advice for me that will make it a better experience? Have you ever done one or talked with someone who did? What should I know? Any tips are appreciated.
posted by andoatnp at 2:53 PM PST - 10 comments

What to feed my dog?

I currently feed my dog, Gatsby Taste of the Wild High Prairie Puppy food (he's on puppy food for another 6 months, then we'll go to dog food). It's grain-free, with protein from high-quality sources (not weird byproducts). But I've recently read an article that says that, not only is grain-free not doing anything to help dogs, it could hurt them. So now I'm confused. Please help me figure out what food is the best for him. [more inside]
posted by Weeping_angel at 2:49 PM PST - 12 comments

Amsterdam or Paris for a honeymoon? Which to pick?!

My spouse and I can't decide whether to go to France or the Netherlands on our honeymoon this spring on our somewhat limited budget; help us decide and whether our budget is realistic! [more inside]
posted by fizzix at 1:29 PM PST - 25 comments

Refund blues

I paid a friend for a ticket to a concert three months ago for a concert that will happen at the end of this month. I learned around Christmas that my job required me to fill in for a conference the same day as the concert. I asked my friend to sell the ticket but I think they may just keep the money. Should I push more on it or is it fair for them to keep the money? [more inside]
posted by buttonedup at 11:32 AM PST - 32 comments

Living in a ski condo part-time?

I need a low-maintenance place to sequester myself occassionally to get work done, but I'd like some income when I'm not there. And some kind of activity, like skiing. [more inside]
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 10:43 AM PST - 2 comments

How to map data?

So I've got a group of organizations. Each organization has a group of board-members. Board-members can serve on multiple organizations. How do I best save this data so that I can easily jump between viewing at the organization level and the individual level? [more inside]
posted by leotrotsky at 10:40 AM PST - 5 comments

Recommend me music by Asian-Americans

I would like to expand my music library. There are only 2 qualifiers: 1. They're Asian 2. They're American [more inside]
posted by picklenickle at 10:30 AM PST - 54 comments

Am I Autostartable?

Just bought a used vehicle, and it came with two Autostart remotes...that don't seem to do anything. Should they? [more inside]
posted by AzraelBrown at 9:38 AM PST - 4 comments

Books about singers for 2nd grade girl?

8 year old niece loves chapter books, graphic novels, and singing. Birthday present hope me? Books ideal but other gift ideas welcome.
posted by Ausamor at 9:19 AM PST - 6 comments

Restaurant recommendation: Little Italy, Toronto ON

My partner and I will be in Toronto at the end of February and would appreciate some suggestions for restaurants. We will be in the Little Italy neighborhood with walking our preferred mode of transportation. Thanks in advance, AskMeFi. :)
posted by danep at 8:44 AM PST - 13 comments

Birthday dinner in buzios

My lovely wife, our 11 yo and myself will be in Búzios, Brazil for her birthday. Where should we go for dinner? [more inside]
posted by signal at 8:35 AM PST - 1 comment

Good title for a Mountain Goats-esque song

I have written most of a song that ended up sounding like the Mountain Goats, a band I’m not as familiar with as I should be. I’ve decided to lean into that and give it a tMG-esque title. What’s a good title for a Mountain Goats-esque original song? (FWIW the song is about being a late bloomer.)
posted by pxe2000 at 8:34 AM PST - 6 comments

voice over acting: explain to me like I am 5

Recently a friend of mine who did voiceover work in his youth (nearly 25 years ago) told me that I have a really great speaking voice and he could see me having some success at it if I tried. How does one pursue this? [more inside]
posted by thereemix at 8:31 AM PST - 4 comments

What kind of spoon is this?

This is a weird spoon! (Bananas for scale). What kind of spoon is it, and where can I buy one?
posted by woodvine at 4:57 AM PST - 10 comments

Blowing Off Untrue Criticism You Are Consistently Exposed To?

My boss criticizing me for something that is very clearly his fault sets off a large bonfire of anger in me, each time. I know this doesn't happen for everyone. Some people can let untrue things roll off their back -- can ignore ignorant criticism because they know where it comes from. If you are such a person -- how do you do it? What do you say to yourself in moments like that? For those who'd rather not read below the fold, assume in your answer that such ignoring is logistically safe. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 4:50 AM PST - 19 comments

What angles am I missing here?

Apparently it's not that easy to have it all. Help a not-so-young-anymore woman prioritize career and the other stuff. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 4:49 AM PST - 26 comments

Why does the coffee filter rip?

My husband prepares coffee using a Clever Dripper. Recently, the filter comes apart at the bottom seam so it lets grounds come through when he “releases” the coffee. We have tried two different types of filters and it happens to both. Not every time but enough times to be annoying. What are we doing wrong? [more inside]
posted by like_neon at 12:59 AM PST - 9 comments

February 1

Masala Cocktails

I made masala infused vodka. It is divine. I tried it in some cocktails but none have done it justice. Help me create the perfect masala vodka cocktail. [more inside]
posted by roolya_boolya at 11:04 PM PST - 17 comments

What's up with flu symptoms coming and going?

My fiancee's flu symptoms are sort of oscillating in a way that's concerning me: is it normal for flu symptoms to recede and then come back? [more inside]
posted by insteadofapricots at 10:55 PM PST - 7 comments

What is this scam?

A nonprofit that a friend works at had someone make repeated donations - like 30 of them - online in a matter of minutes. Each donation was for something like $30 from the same credit card and address, though a different e-mail it seems. The last time this happened, their IT department shut down the donations portal. I don't really understand why IT bothered doing that and what the scam was or why it keeps happening. I'm curious though. Is this a common scam and what does it accomplish?
posted by Toddles at 10:27 PM PST - 8 comments

Dress me for my office, w/o going broke

I hate shopping, but my work wardrobe is in serious need of a refresh. I am looking for US online stores with well-curated "west coast tech" women's business casual work clothes that are 1) not too expensive -- say less than 70 tops/blouses for decent quality, 2) has good selection of clothing types that are not just dresses (b/c I don't wear dresses). I love the M.M LaFleur aesthetic, but not the prices. [more inside]
posted by ellerhodes at 9:57 PM PST - 8 comments

can I eat boiled but otherwise unprocessed (e.g., unfermented) soybeans?

Someone claimed that soybeans had to be fermented or otherwise processed in order to make them digestible. And indeed many sources indicate that soybeans contain anti-nutrients like phytic acid and Bowman-Birk protease inhibitor. I don't know how much this matters. Do I need to process my soybeans in some unusual way to get adequate nutrition out of them? [more inside]
posted by meaty shoe puppet at 8:44 PM PST - 7 comments

Renting in Vancouver, BC

How do I Vancouver? I am Canadian, moving from a mid sized Canadian city, about to begin negotiating a job offer with an American firm who is looking to expand their business in Canada. All I hear are horror stories about the rental market and low vacancy rates. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 7:28 PM PST - 8 comments

Wording writing experience for a temporarily offline magazine on resume

I write on a freelance basis for an online magazine that will be relaunched next month. I might have been promoted to culture editor (feels unreal and I will find out if this is the case on Monday wooo) and I’d like to put this on my CV and/or cover letter when I pitch to other literary websites and journals. [more inside]
posted by dostoevskygirl at 7:25 PM PST - 2 comments

Is my relationship as toxic as I worry it is?

My long-term relationship almost completely lacks intimacy, and sometimes feels stifling. My attempts to fix it haven't gone well. I'm 40 and afraid of being alone. Help? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 7:21 PM PST - 36 comments

Shuffled, scrambled, randomized

I have some found text (lists of words and phrases) that I'm using for a writing project. I'm looking for some easy online tools to manipulate the text to help me get ideas. I've found plenty of tools to shuffle the order of entries, and I can translate back and forth. What are some other tools that can help? I'm especially interested in any kind of erasure tool, but I'd love any tips.
posted by mermaidcafe at 6:58 PM PST - 8 comments

Photo prints with rounded corners: where to order?

I found a vintage photo album from the 70s and would like to fill it with photo prints like the kind you could get in the 70s and 80s, borderless matte with rounded corners. Any recs for an online service that does this?
posted by Dragonness at 6:52 PM PST - 6 comments

Dealing with Long-Ago Shame at a Joyful Event

Two of my dear college friends are getting married (from two different friend circles that later found each other). Several folks from my younger days will be there, including one that I hurt really badly. I'm feeling overwhelmed with anxiety and shame, and I'm trying to find somewhere to put that shame that isn't harmful. [more inside]
posted by socktothepuppet at 6:19 PM PST - 17 comments

I dip you dip we dip

I'm going to be making this Kimchi Dip on Sunday for a party we'll be attending. Would it benefit from being made early in the day to allow the flavors to meld? (I'm a relative newbie to cooking, as you can probably tell. Heh).
posted by cozenedindigo at 4:34 PM PST - 6 comments

Car trade in—how does it work?

Currently paying on a car I hate, would like to trade to a car I don’t hate. But I have bad credit and owe money on the current car. [more inside]
posted by zinful at 4:22 PM PST - 7 comments

A Blog without pictures is like a night without stars

I have a blog on the Blogger platform, owned by Google. I started it in 2011 and I no longer update it, but it's full of good memories and I'd hate for it to disappear. (link on my profile if you're interested in Hiking in Minnesota). Today I received an email from Google saying that Google + is going away (whatever, I deleted my G+ account years ago) and they're going to be deleting the photos and videos attached to it. I clicked on their "Album Archive" link and holy shit, it's got all of my Blogger pictures on it. I've FAQ'ed and (ha) Googled but can't get a straight answer. Are my pictures going to disappear? And if so, what now? [more inside]
posted by Gray Duck at 4:16 PM PST - 10 comments

Do rockets have the most fire?

My 3-year-old asked me this question and I didn't have a good answer for her. Do rockets create more fire than anything else, and if not what is capable of creating more? I figured the sun isn't exactly fire and I hoped the answer wasn't a nuclear bomb, as I'd rather not introduce her to the idea of warfare quite yet.
posted by thetruthisjustalie at 3:21 PM PST - 21 comments

Is a wireless hard drive right for me?

I just got a Dell XPS laptop and while it's great so far, the hard drive is a lot smaller than my old Thinkpad where I stored pretty much all of my digital life. I've looked into getting a wireless HD for backup/extra storage but after reading some reviews it seems like wireless HDs are still slow/unreliable/finicky unless they're super expensive. I'd like to have between 2-3 TB of external storage for under $200. Does a wireless HD make sense for me? Any specific suggestions? [more inside]
posted by mcmile at 3:11 PM PST - 3 comments

improve my favorite snack

My current favorite snack is eating thin slices of very sharp cheddar with small bits of raw very hot peppers (habanero and such). The fattiness of the cheese tempers the hotness of the pepper so I can really appreciate the taste as well as the capsaicin glow. But I probably shouldn't be eating so damn much cheese. Any suggestions? [more inside]
posted by moonmilk at 12:59 PM PST - 28 comments

What are these mystery texts?

Did my phone number get spoofed? All day I've been getting texts from unfamiliar numbers with just the single word "stop" -- like they're trying to opt out of text messages from me. [more inside]
posted by BlahLaLa at 12:36 PM PST - 5 comments

What iPad recording/microphone interface should I get?

Amateur musician, just starting to mess around with iPad music apps, interested in various kinds of recording. What iPad interface should I get? Lots of questions below: [more inside]
posted by twoplussix at 12:07 PM PST - 7 comments

How do you sticky up a zipper?

So I've got a pair of pants I love and they have a loose zipper. Given that occasionally I go commando when it's close to laundry day, that's a problem waiting to happen. So how do you make a zipper LESS loose? I've seen tons online for the opposite but nothing for this. So what? Rust? Maple syrup? A hammer? I'm open. Literally.
posted by rileyray3000 at 10:53 AM PST - 14 comments

A question about social science grad students

My fictional character is a social science grad student. I am not, nor have I ever been. If you know this particular world, do you have any ideas for me? [more inside]
posted by swheatie at 10:13 AM PST - 32 comments

Round/oval dining tables - are they uncomfortable?

Are round/oval dining tables less comfortable to sit at (for eating, reading the newspaper, typing on a laptop etc) than rectangular/square dining tables? (Question is not "does everybody feel this way" because of course not but rather "is this an actual thing for some people"). [more inside]
posted by acidic at 10:12 AM PST - 24 comments

Job interviews with social anxiety

I've been looking for a new job for a few months, and I've had a ton of interviews for really exciting jobs, but I keep screwing them up because of social anxiety. [more inside]
posted by Chenko at 10:09 AM PST - 14 comments

Hope me: finding a contemporary Chinese artist, black inkwash landscapes

I know this is an almost impossible ask, but about 15 years ago I came across a thrift store book of paintings by a contemporary Chinese artist who works in black ink. The pieces were often expansive landscapes with small human figures but stylistically they had a decidedly loose, bleed-y, "happy accident" feel rather than the tightly controlled landscapes you often see. I know this is a long shot, but I thought I would see if anyone had any possible leads. I lost the book and it's kind of haunted me since.
posted by SinAesthetic at 10:02 AM PST - 1 comment

Products for next-day curly hair?

What are your go-to styling products and tips for revitalizing next-day long curly hair, especially after sleeping on it? [more inside]
posted by shortyJBot at 9:58 AM PST - 16 comments

Audio auto sensing?

I have a soundbar with 3 inputs: some sort of optical, 3.5mm and one other I don't recall. The switching between inputs on this bar is annoying. Is there a device I can put in front of the soundbar that can automatically switch input devices and have only output that I'll then connect to the soundbar?
posted by aeighty at 9:58 AM PST - 4 comments

Just the Conditioner, Please. No Plastic Packaging.

What's the best conditioner available in Canada that's not packaged in plastic? [more inside]
posted by platitudipus at 9:49 AM PST - 8 comments

Fun (ironic) tunes to play on the Flutophone

A friend of mine gave me a Flutophone as a joke. Now ofcourse I have to counter this by getting at least a proper song under my belt, that is NOT a Christian hymn, or a kids song. [more inside]
posted by Thisandthat at 9:46 AM PST - 13 comments

Why is my electricity and gas bill so high?

My electricity and gas bill is suddenly like $100 more than it used to be each month for a few months. The PG&E website gives me some info like “We think your heating usage is higher” and “the difference is mostly due to electricity rather than gas” and it gives tips like “Try setting your thermostat lower” (no way. I’m freezing all the time). I would still like to ask you folks if there’s anything you’ve successfully done to bring these bills down once they go up like this. [more inside]
posted by bleep at 9:27 AM PST - 27 comments

In search of your most seasoned travel advice

I don't fly much anymore. I'd drive or train it if I could but I don't have 3 extra days. Help my flight not suck. [more inside]
posted by intrepid_simpleton at 9:22 AM PST - 21 comments

Kindergarten! Help with an anxious child.

The MrFuga spawn is starting kinder in the fall. Questions about kindergarten (both specific to LA and not) abound! Blizzard after the fold. [more inside]
posted by mrfuga0 at 9:19 AM PST - 9 comments

Finding a reputable social media lookup service

I work for an ad agency and they tasked me with finding the social media accounts of people who've used this very new, specialized product. I have email, name, phone number, address, city and state, but I'm really struggling to find their social media accounts. [more inside]
posted by OnTheLastCastle at 9:17 AM PST - 3 comments

Room design apps?

We are moving and I want to plan out where furniture will go before we move. I've traditionally done this with Excel and using shapes to represent furniture. But maybe there is an easy to use website for this that I don't know about?
posted by k8t at 9:13 AM PST - 9 comments

Summer opportunities for college student with Aspergers

My son doesn't have anything lined up for this coming summer, the one before his senior year. He has come into a bit of money which would enable him to afford do some kind of summer program so he's not sitting around working some part-time, low-paying job and the rest of the time glued to his screen, gaming. I'd love him to have the opportunity to gain skills, network, learn more about the world, and get off his butt. [more inside]
posted by primate moon at 8:59 AM PST - 5 comments

(No) curtains for you!

What's the name for a theater set that is always exposed to the audience? [more inside]
posted by DrAstroZoom at 8:52 AM PST - 6 comments

Rollicking ramble-eers

Looking for recommendations in Australia. My best friend and I are going on the trip of a lifetime, two weeks on the east coast starting Feb. 14. YIPPEE! YAHOO! Details inside. [more inside]
posted by Melismata at 8:49 AM PST - 6 comments

How do I get a dead dishwasher to drain? Not currently on fire.

My dishwasher just died dramatically and I had to cut off the power. I've always hated this dishwasher and am going to get a new one, but for now I've got a dead dishwasher with a few inches of gross water in the bottom. How do I get it to drain, if it isn't powered? [more inside]
posted by The corpse in the library at 8:40 AM PST - 10 comments


I play music from my computer through a mini-plug line-out that splits into RCA plugs and goes into my amplifier and speakers. I have a decent higher range stereo amplifier and I have some Infinity bookshelf speakers. Two questions: for the purposes of sound quality, does it matter whether I turn up the sound on my computer or on my amp? I have a USB audio out device, for the purposes of sound quality should I use USB out instead of mini-stereo out to send sound from my iMac to my stereo amp?
posted by OmieWise at 7:15 AM PST - 9 comments

An Evolving Creationist

A friend of mine, who describes herself (accurately, I believe) as an open-minded creationist, reached out to me, asking me to recommend a book to her about Evolution. [more inside]
posted by grumblebee at 6:58 AM PST - 22 comments

Switching over to RV living?

Are there any recommendations or items that really help with living in an RV? Also will take recommendations for paring down stuff and storing things in a small RV! [more inside]
posted by needlegrrl at 6:03 AM PST - 11 comments

workplace fundraising ideas

The warehouse that serves most food banks in my province caught fire earlier this week and everything was destroyed. I want to get some sort of fundraiser going in my fairly large office to raise some cash for them and I'm looking for ideas. We've had success with silent auctions in the past, but I'd like to do something a little different.
posted by peppermind at 4:09 AM PST - 15 comments

What would you ask a doctor who has conducted dozens of assisted suicide

I have the opportunity to interview (for a news article) a doctor who, because of his specialty with terminal disease, has conducted dozens of assisted suicides in his career for his patients, mostly in their homes. I would like to ask questions that reveal the emotional challenge that comes with doing a job like this. Given the sensitive content the doctor tends to be guarded, so I need different ways to ask this question to open him up. What would you ask?
posted by Jason and Laszlo at 3:37 AM PST - 14 comments