October 2019 Archives

October 31

Pump Up Chicago ‘19

I’m in Chicago for a conference. I’m looking for it an underground Chicago house experience on Saturday night. What are my options? [more inside]
posted by mykescipark at 10:44 PM PST - 2 comments

Cross citation analysis - What cites what across 550 pdfs

I'd like to find - which papers cite other papers, and get a list showing what cites what - are there any papers uncited by any other papers I'm doing this as I want to filter out the papers that have less value as I feel that about fifty are really really useful, others less so. Would prefer a desktop solution, and free. [more inside]
posted by unearthed at 10:16 PM PST - 3 comments

No, I Insist!

How do you deal with people fighting you when you want to pick up the tab or buy someone a drink for helping them? Or vice versa? [more inside]
posted by christiehawk at 10:15 PM PST - 31 comments

Is there any consolation?

10 years have passed. Just learned my ex is remarried.i haven't even dated. How to not feel like a total loser? [more inside]
posted by Pastor of Muppets at 8:00 PM PST - 10 comments

Angry outbursts - can you help?

So I have been having angry outbursts (TW: self-harm, child abuse) lately after more than 20 years of not having them. This is odd because this year has been a really good one for me, the best year out of the last 10, easily. I want to know: - where this is coming from/why this is happening now - if anyone on here has been through this or something similar [more inside]
posted by EatMyHat at 7:47 PM PST - 6 comments

Why can’t guys admit that they like me? Are they embarrassed by me?

I don't know if guys are interested in me and afraid to admit it, or not interested at all. Snowflakes inside! [more inside]
posted by Kobayashi Maru at 7:32 PM PST - 26 comments

Another job stay-or-go question

I have a tough career decision ahead. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 6:39 PM PST - 8 comments

What's after therapist/psychiatrist but before psych ward and 911

(CW Sui Ideation, Depression) What are my options between "showing up to weekly therapy" and "calling 911"/"checking in to a psych ward" and/or "completely losing my shit and having this decision made non-consensually for me"? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 6:31 PM PST - 11 comments

First time in NYC - got any tourist hacks?

Any tips for cheap or free must-dos in New York City on a weekday next week? [more inside]
posted by tacodave at 5:45 PM PST - 29 comments

How transparent can I be with this recruiter?

Recruiter recently sent me a job that is perfect but I need to turn down because in the new position I'd report to a former coworker that I didn't get along with. I'm afraid to be honest to the recruiter about the reasoning because I don't want to look bad, or like I'm not a team player. Otherwise, this position is pretty awesome and is everything I'm looking for - so I don't want to use the excuse that it doesn't fit my criteria for other reasons. What can I tell the recruiter? [more inside]
posted by koolaidnovel at 4:42 PM PST - 5 comments

What is gratitude?

I understand that gratitude journals are a common thing to do to improve one's mood and outlook, but I realized I don't really have any positive associations with gratitude. I'm wondering how other people conceptualize it that makes it an uplifting thing to dwell on. [more inside]
posted by space snail at 3:23 PM PST - 30 comments

Which kind of self-cleaning oven to get?

There are two kinds: one gets REALLY hot and cleans better; the other kind doesn't get as hot and you put a pan of water in it but then you have to clean the sides and back. Which kind should I get??
posted by DMelanogaster at 3:09 PM PST - 10 comments

Hair Inspiration for the Grown-up Goth

I'm an aging goth who has had the same long hair + baby bangs look for the past decade. As I approach 30, I'm looking for something...new? Different? Less severe? But I have no idea where to start. Any ideas of sites/blogs etc. with hair inspiration for grown up alternative types? [more inside]
posted by noxperpetua at 2:56 PM PST - 10 comments

How Does One Develop a Profit-Sharing Plan for a Singular Event?

I would like to gather a group of jovial and creative individuals to assist in producing an independent event that will celebrate Buckminster Fuller's 125th birthday in July 2020. My intent is to introduce Fuller to a new audience, inspire this audience with their unique purpose, and provide a stage to honor those who carried on Fuller's work through their art, design and other chosen disciplines. I am looking into the possibility of having a profit sharing plan for the production team. How does one go about developing one? Who can I speak with for advice?
posted by goalyeehah at 2:00 PM PST - 4 comments

What the heck is biting me?

I am getting bug (?) bites at home. No one else is getting them. And they're weird. Help? [more inside]
posted by my left sock at 1:52 PM PST - 16 comments

Knitfilter: could I turn this ITR throw into four joined squares?

I am 3.5 skeins into this pattern from Ravelry. I am getting sort of tired of doing extremely long rows and wondering about making four squares and grafting them but I have questions. [more inside]
posted by less of course at 1:50 PM PST - 4 comments

Why would an estranged sibling make contact as part of estate planning?

My elderly mom's estranged sister contacted her after 30 years of not talking. Why? [more inside]
posted by umbú at 12:28 PM PST - 17 comments

Left handed digital calipers

I currently use Mitutoyo digital calipers. They are, like so many things, built for right hand use. I am looking for comparable digital calipers in a left hand version.
posted by apex_ at 12:06 PM PST - 4 comments

Fast internet away from home

Need fast internet away from home office. Options? [more inside]
posted by artdrectr at 10:30 AM PST - 13 comments

Switching to a vegetarian diet

I'm interested in (slowly) testing a low-meat and/or vegetarian diet and looking for resources, books, tips. More context and list of complications below. [more inside]
posted by Automocar at 10:06 AM PST - 27 comments

Is it time to charge for my tarot readings? And how do?!

I've read tarot cards for free for years, and I'm good at it and enjoy it, but the free exchange is beginning to leave me a little drained. Looking for advice on how to level up. [more inside]
posted by saramour at 9:26 AM PST - 13 comments

Craft cocktail bars in London

Hi! Early 40s couple headed to London for four days in early December, and we are huge cocktail devotees. In fact, that's the key impetus for this trip! So which craft cocktail bars should we visit? (We'll have three nights in town.) Thanks for your suggestions!
posted by Conrad Cornelius o'Donald o'Dell at 9:01 AM PST - 16 comments

enjoy every sandwich

Please share with me examples of annotated "good deaths" - words/music/video/etc. that people have created to mark their impending death. [more inside]
posted by headnsouth at 8:42 AM PST - 22 comments

Data Analyst: Certificate/Masters vs. Bootcamp

Have you done one or the other? Tell me what it was like and what you wish you'd done/regret/are so happy you did, please! Trying to make my final decision. [more inside]
posted by OnTheLastCastle at 8:36 AM PST - 12 comments

Tactics for acute anxiety attack

Last night, while I was feeling very anxious, my husband helped me by asking me to go through the “evidence for the counterfactuals” (ie take my anxious thoughts, think of the opposite thing, and then find evidence for this opposite thing). It was very effective at breaking the cycle in the moment. Do you have other short-term tactics like that? Please note: I am not looking for long term tactics as anxiety happens to me more like a coughing fit than a chronic cough.
posted by CMcG at 8:21 AM PST - 15 comments

How to survive a bad university?

I'm trying to earn a Master's degree in architecture in a disastrously bad university. I earned by Bachelors abroad, but now I've returned home and this is the only place I can study in my home country. For various reasons it's not possible for me to go abroad again, but a Master's would really help my career. The program I'm in is run by old, conservative professors who really haven't caught up with the 21st century, use racial slurs in class and express sexist sentiments. A couple of years ago the head of the department said that women should't really pursue a career in architecture. It was in an informal setting, but clearly, he believes this. More nightmare fuel below the fold. [more inside]
posted by luminary at 7:11 AM PST - 14 comments

Basement Waterproofing Concerns

We had a basement waterproofing company install a french drain. The project is not completed. The company plans to send out someone to close up the remaining open flooring today. I have several concerns about the work, both functional and cosmetic. [more inside]
posted by RoadScholar at 6:44 AM PST - 3 comments

Who the heck says Uline?

Is it possible to remove certain words from Google/Android speech recognition results? Generally speaking, the system works perfectly for me, exactly transcribing when I'm saying except when I try to get a carriage return. This feels like insidious product placement, as I can't imagine anyone needing to regularly dictate the name have an office supply company…
posted by lordcorvid at 6:19 AM PST - 2 comments

Sausage Fest

I have a giant spiral of boerwors in my fridge. Because weather, my original plan to grill it is shot. I've never had/made it before. How should I make this indoors? I have a gas range and oven and can grocery shop for anything I'm missing.
posted by fluttering hellfire at 6:17 AM PST - 5 comments

What is a fair salary range for this job description?

I requested a raise recently, and my boss asked me to write up my current job description so he could present it to management in my behalf. Based on the following, what would you consider a reasonable salary range? I live in the Portland, ME area. [more inside]
posted by jwhite1979 at 4:43 AM PST - 3 comments

Surgery for carpal tunnel and de Quervain's In both hands

I know it differs from one individual to another, but what's my recovery time look like? [more inside]
posted by New England Cultist at 2:24 AM PST - 4 comments

Instant Pot cookbooks without 600 recipes

Winter is coming. I want to try to use our Instant Pot for more than rice. I’ve tried a few internet recipes with varying success. But we’ve been using recipe books more often so I’m trying to find one for the Instant Pot but it is a mess of books of 600 recipes, keto or vegetarian. (I have nothing against keto or vegetarian meals, just don’t eat that way). Can you recommend a cookbook? [more inside]
posted by like_neon at 1:38 AM PST - 17 comments

Book/Media Recs for a Young Adult Child of an Addict?

My family have relatively recently acquired a young woman whose family of origin has a lot of dysfunction, including on-going mental health and addiction issues. What books or media can you recommend that might resonate? Snowflakes within [more inside]
posted by DebetEsse at 1:09 AM PST - 7 comments

October 30

Help me find other people who are questioning their faith

I was quite serious about my Christian faith until my late twenties. Now I’m not sure what I believe, and I find that for me the first step is to take some time to reexamine what evidence there is for and against God’s existence/the Bible/etc. I think it would be healthy to talk to other people who are in a similar situation, but I don’t want to join a group that will try to persuade me in one direction or the other. Any suggestions? (Also open to your own stories and more general advice.) [more inside]
posted by a huckleberry at 9:55 PM PST - 27 comments

How to not be a jerk to some realtors

We've started thinking about buying a house. A few different realtors have been in touch with us. When do we need to pick one? [more inside]
posted by ghost phoneme at 8:16 PM PST - 11 comments

Best places to drive around looking at scenery Denver-adjacent

I'm going to be in Denver on Saturday and want to spend the day driving around looking at mountains and trees and whatnot. I know that that stuff isn't exactly "close" to Denver but I will have about 4 hours to kill so it's fine. Where should I head up into? Open to any and all recommendations. [more inside]
posted by bleep at 6:53 PM PST - 8 comments

Left my pot pies on the kitchen counter!

I bought some pot pies and other assorted frozen dinners at the supermarket tonight and absentmindedly left them all-but-one on the kitchen counter during the hour I heated one in the oven. I quickly put them in the freezer before hopping on AskMeFi to see if they'll be safe to heat and eat going forward. I'm sure I'll be okay, but thought I'd ask here. Your verdict?
posted by Ranucci at 6:15 PM PST - 9 comments

Property manager for small condo corporation in Ottawa, Canada

Asking for a friend: any recommendations for a property management company that could look after a 10-unit condo building in downtown Ottawa, Canada?
posted by rpfields at 6:08 PM PST - 4 comments

Thin, kinda durable, kinda warm gloves

I have these OR gloves. They kinda suck, but at the same time are kind of perfect all around. I'd really like to find a better replacement glove that's thin, durable and somewhat warm. [more inside]
posted by so fucking future at 5:53 PM PST - 4 comments

Will my car insurance cover my spouse? (multi-state edition)

I have insurance from Esurance. The car is registered in New York and we both have New York drivers licenses. However, we also own a house in Rhode Island. Here’s where it gets complicated... [more inside]
posted by degoao at 5:25 PM PST - 5 comments

Migraines and migraines and migraines, oh my!

My silent migraines keep getting worse. I am going back to the doctor in two weeks. What should I ask for? What are my next steps? [more inside]
posted by Amy93 at 5:22 PM PST - 17 comments

Books for the middle aged

I am middle aged. I am looking for books with middle aged characters or about this stage of life. [more inside]
posted by 2 cats in the yard at 5:01 PM PST - 35 comments

Could you help me find a jewelry making kit or book for my niece?

My 16 year old niece has requested a "jewelry project kit" or a "jewelry making book" for the holidays. I know very little about making jewelry and I'm having trouble wading through all the different options! Could you recommend some books, kits, and/or online stores where I might be able to find something she likes? [more inside]
posted by cimton at 3:51 PM PST - 8 comments

Seeking the best sweater

I am looking to buy some solid sweaters for myself (F) and my husband. Back when I was 19, I traveled for 3 months with just an army-navy surplus sweater, so I must have worn it through thorn bushes and washed the heck out of it, yet it stayed in decent shape. Yet now when I buy sweaters, they quickly snag, get holes in them, or shrink. What's up with that, and how can I buy one with army-navy durability but a bit more style? Bonus points for extended warranties!
posted by Spokane at 3:20 PM PST - 10 comments

How to get the max number of qualified applicants for a job posting?

I'm managing a hiring process for my small independent school and looking for advice, tips, strategies for attracting the maximum number of high-quality applicants to a job opening. [more inside]
posted by mai at 3:09 PM PST - 8 comments

Help me put something cool on la table

I found an old Sur La Table gift card that I'd forgotten about, and now $138 is burning a hole in my pocket. I would like to buy something fun and a little frivolous that will make my cooking life better--what do you suggest? [more inside]
posted by assenav at 3:00 PM PST - 24 comments

Need to find a restaurant in Orlando

We will be staying in a hotel on International Drive, Orlando on Monday night, meeting English friends flying in from the UK who will go on to the Kennedy Space Center the next day. We want to take them to a restaurant that is not a chain (like Longhorn or Carrabba's) and not overly pricey. We are carnivores but also like fish restaurants. TexMex, Thai or American are all good. [more inside]
posted by lungtaworld at 2:56 PM PST - 7 comments

The Price of a Good Number

I've had the same phone number for a decade, but before me it apparently belonged to "Jay", who has debts. I have had to endure Jay's debt collectors calling me this whole time. I finally learned Jay's company and last name yesterday because one of them texted me with details. Is there any way to make these calls stop now that I have this information? [more inside]
posted by Mizu at 1:16 PM PST - 13 comments

help me stay asleep

So I'm in the middle of an external situation that is filling me with dread and stress. One of the ways this is affecting me is that I wake up between 2-3 am, "fight or flight" reflexes blazing. I generally don't have trouble falling asleep -- often I'm exhausted and fall asleep easily -- but after about 4 hours I'm done. I haven't had a full night of sleep in weeks and it's starting to affect me badly. Anyone have tricks for staying asleep? [more inside]
posted by fingersandtoes at 12:44 PM PST - 43 comments

Too many lymphocytes

My father remains mostly asymptomatic from his T-PLL, but his lymphocytes are slowly trending up and, as I assume they're being crowded out or the stem cells that make them are, all his other cells (red blood cells, platelets, hemoglobin) are slowly trending down. He is not currently being treated. [more inside]
posted by sockingjay at 12:36 PM PST - 7 comments

Is there a way to transfer to Google Fi and preserve old phone numbers?

I would like to transfer from my current cell phone plan to Google Fi, for cellular service. I currently have a phone number from my carrier that I use with a lot of people, and an additional Google Voice number that I use with a lot of people. Is there a way to move to Google Fi, while keeping both my old phone number, and my Google Voice number active? [more inside]
posted by andoatnp at 12:33 PM PST - 4 comments

I was let go from my job. I suspect this was retaliation. Advice?

I was recently let go from my job, and I'm suspecting this is a targeted retaliation. More details in the fold. [more inside]
posted by thoughtful_analyst at 11:39 AM PST - 30 comments

What is using my phone's data connection.

Every so often my phone (Android LG G5 on giffgaff in the UK) will stop taking to the internet. Pokémon gives me a network error, Google on Chrome says I'm offline. But the 4G icon is lit up showing data going both up and down solidly. Is there anyway to find out what's going on?
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 11:12 AM PST - 4 comments

Help me roll with it

I make big batches of soups / stews weekly and pack them for work lunches. This is great, but having a tasty bread-type accompaniment to round out the meal makes it The Best. Inspire me with your favourite portable carbs! [more inside]
posted by halation at 11:00 AM PST - 14 comments

ideas for using Windows 10 with low vision

A friend who's losing their vision recently got a Windows 10 PC. She's asked me to help her learn her way around. Please suggest what might be helpful [more inside]
posted by anadem at 10:48 AM PST - 6 comments

Birthday on a boat

I'm looking for suggestions to mark a team member's birthday... while we're out at sea. [more inside]
posted by backseatpilot at 10:23 AM PST - 13 comments

Building a web-based app

I'm trying to learn how to build a simple web-based application and I'm having a hard time finding a good starting point. I have a very specific use case and what should be simple requirements - details inside. [more inside]
posted by philosophygeek at 10:15 AM PST - 3 comments

Looking for the Holy Grail of Messenger Bags

I'm on a quest to find the perfect (for me) messenger bag. Can you help? [more inside]
posted by sharp pointy objects at 10:08 AM PST - 13 comments

Can women become impotent

Can a woman be classified as "impotent" or is there a different adjective for this? [more inside]
posted by The_imp_inimpossible at 7:56 AM PST - 12 comments

Women-only spaces in the Twin Cities

I'm looking for women-only spaces, venues, events, gatherings, and more in the Twin Cities. Anything and everything goes. [more inside]
posted by anderjen at 7:07 AM PST - 12 comments

Help me build an articulated streetcar - glue, drilling, and tying

I'm building an articulated streetcar (Toronto's "new streetcar") that can run on kids wood train tracks. I need advice gluing (duct tape covered in paper to wood covered in paper and modpodge), clamping, drilling, and who knows what else. So this started as a question about glue, but now I'm realizing that I have one chance go get this right, so please throw at me any advice that might be helpful. Here's my plan, along with the gaps. Please fill the gaps and tell me where my plan is flawed. [more inside]
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 5:33 AM PST - 25 comments

New microwave light is flickering. Should I return?

I just bought a new microwave. It cooks just fine but the inner light (which turns on when opened) flickers intermittently. Would this be a reason to return it? Additional details necessary for answering the question inside. [more inside]
posted by BuddyBoo at 5:23 AM PST - 9 comments

Couples counselor in Brooklyn or Manhattan?

Hi, I'm looking for a couples counselor in the South Brooklyn area (Park Slope to Brooklyn Heights area) or somewhere in Manhattan on the F line. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:30 AM PST - 3 comments

October 29

How long does it take Gorilla glue to expand (not cure)?

You know how gorilla glue expands as it cures? I know curing takes 24 hours, but how long does the glue expand for and when does it start expanding? Alternative suggestions to gorilla glue also welcome. [more inside]
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 9:13 PM PST - 23 comments

What is this yarn ply... or whatever?

I used this yarn on my last tapestry and it's the best yarn I've found for weaving, but I'm looking for yarn with a bigger range of colors. I've tried other cotton yarns, and it seems like the specific type of ply of this Lion Brand yarn is what keeps it from unravelling in the loom while I'm weaving. Please help? [more inside]
posted by ancient star at 7:08 PM PST - 5 comments

Very painful disappointment ten years ago continues to haunt me

Hi everyone. I have a question today about accepting and closing the door on something disappointing that happened ten years ago. Just one mention of this thing can ruin my day or my week and I don't believe its going to get better with time, because its been ten years ... still feel absolute shit when I see a mention of it. [more inside]
posted by catbird at 6:38 PM PST - 20 comments

Waiting for therapy - how to cope in the meantime?

I'm deeply depressed and can't see a therapist until mid-December. Seeking advice and strategies on dealing with myself until then. Snowstorm inside. [more inside]
posted by mcfighty at 6:14 PM PST - 13 comments

Can you help me recreate the vegan mushroom couscous from Zaytinya?

Can you help me recreate the vegan mushroom couscous from Zaytinya? [more inside]
posted by slenderloris at 5:22 PM PST - 13 comments

Car accident. What do we ask for?

My Dad got hit by a tow truck. He was walking with the family dog. He’s conscious but aching. Police and ambulance are here. Driver didn’t drive off and is cooperating with police. He’s a driver for the tow truck company. What do we ask for and from whom? What else should we be thinking about? We’re still on the scene.
posted by saltypup at 4:43 PM PST - 5 comments

I didn't vote for this horror & I'm sorry, but I'm not here as a proxy

How can I preclude hostility from online ELL adults (group classes)? I got through the first wave or two of being expected to answer for the US's actions that occurred during/after the 2016 election. But this last weekend was the most recent punch in the gut- a Yemeni student, rather than introducing himself with his job, interests, etc he gave details on what Yemen is currently experiencing, which I'm aware of. I tried to say some supportive things, and told him I need to focus for everyone here but I was nearly in tears because of course he was right. Can you suggest anything I could say to prevent this oblique 'attack?' I don't know if I can stomach any more of the anecdotes like the latter, the dogpiling, the snide shitty attitudes I can get just for being American at them. But what can I say? How can I prevent this, or indicate we're on the same side without becoming a blubbering puddle? Any thoughts would be appreciated. -A little more inside- [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 3:11 PM PST - 24 comments

Help relieving disproportionate stress

I started a new job about 9 months ago and gradually since then my mental health completely tanked - over the summer was crying half the work day / lying motionless all weekend on the couch. I'm doing better now but still maybe 70% of my energy goes towards damage control / existence maintenance. The thing is, job is totally fine and nothing stressful is even happening. Help me figure out how to have a less severe reaction to daily life. [more inside]
posted by internet of pillows at 3:10 PM PST - 15 comments

Business (very) Casual Winter Shoes for Terrible Feet

Looking for flat, work appropriate black boots or booties that will be comfortable for my terrible feet. [more inside]
posted by sunshine37 at 2:23 PM PST - 12 comments

What are some great music biographies and memoirs?

I know about the Keith Richards one, Springsteen, Patti Smith, Motley Crue... I'd love some more that people have loved. Rock music preferred but open to other genres. It's hard to sort through the ones on Amazon - so many of them seem like unauthorized, opportunistic, dashed-off garbage. Thanks!
posted by malhouse at 1:32 PM PST - 46 comments

Music for a Winter Garden

I'm seeking music to be played outdoors as background classical-ish music at a secular public winter holiday display in a garden. I want to include music from both Christian/Christmas and non-Christian/non-Christmas traditions that would be suitable for that kind of setting. We are located in the US in a city that has a diverse population and we see visitors representative of that diversity. I'm hoping that people who come can find something that makes them happy in the playlist. [more inside]
posted by sciencegeek at 1:05 PM PST - 16 comments

Help us understand unexpected DNA results

A friend took an DNA test and there was an unexpected result. According to the test, their ethnicity is just under 30% “European Jewish”. This was surprising since, as far as they know, they have no Jewish ancestors. [more inside]
posted by Sabby at 1:01 PM PST - 13 comments

Good perfume subscription box

Have you tried a perfume subscription box? I have questions! [more inside]
posted by Bebo at 12:20 PM PST - 5 comments

Two Label Conundrums

I often need various shapes of mailing-style labels (examples below). But companies like Avery don't sell blank white assorted-size labels. Can anyone advise, or else should I buy whole sheets and cut to size as needed...or resort to cut paper and glue, 1965-style? Also: I use these address labels for packages, but they're expensive and I often don't use the "from" sticker (so I'd rather they weren't labeled). Can anyone suggest better? [more inside]
posted by Quisp Lover at 10:21 AM PST - 6 comments

make-up bag logistics

I'm interested how those of you who wear make-up manage the make-up you carry around with you. I don't wear a lot of make-up but I really enjoy the small amount that I do wear. One thing that stops me wearing it more regularly is the logistics of deciding what make-up I carry around with me versus what I keep at home. [more inside]
posted by unicorn chaser at 10:13 AM PST - 23 comments

Rock Pianists Who Are Women

Who are your favorite rock pianists who are women - especially on the less melodic, more pounding end of the spectrum? [more inside]
posted by kristi at 9:24 AM PST - 20 comments

Job won’t tell me the offer until I pass tests?

Is this normal? And would it be entirely rude to wait until I know the salary to make a final (and possible rejecting) decision even if this process takes a week? [more inside]
posted by buttonedup at 9:17 AM PST - 31 comments

Tapestry mystery

Can anyone help us learn more about this tapestry? Link to images here. Possibly Turkish or Korean origin. [more inside]
posted by beandip at 8:58 AM PST - 6 comments

Help for secondary trauma

Help me cope with a short- to medium-term stressful situation as I wait for professional help. Content warning for suicide attempt by friend and related stuff below the fold. [more inside]
posted by Bella Donna at 8:47 AM PST - 6 comments

Where should we hole up for Christmas?

For the first time EVER, Mr. Dorinda and I will be doing Christmas with just the two of us (and our dogs). To stave off any homesickness that might afflict us (read: me) when we’re away from the hustle and bustle of Full Family Christmas, we’d like to help make our first Us-mas a little special by spending it somewhere cute, quaint, homey, Christmasy, and not too far of a drive from our house. Where should we go?! [more inside]
posted by Dorinda at 7:28 AM PST - 11 comments

when millenials become parents

My 3.5 year old really wants to "see Spiderman" on a day trip to NYC next week. Where should we take him for the highest likelihood of success? [more inside]
posted by joyceanmachine at 6:45 AM PST - 5 comments

Cutting burlap for garden use

We wrap our box woods with burlap each winter. In the past, we’ve used just office scissors, which are no match for the burlap and become very dull. What do professional gardeners use to cut burlap? Bypass shears? Knives? Some sort of utility scissor? Cost is no object, so give me something that will last! [more inside]
posted by Admiral Haddock at 6:25 AM PST - 16 comments

Is 50 likes a lot? (I can't believe I'm asking this question)

So, I made a throw-away Twitter lurker account, but of course I couldn't help myself and started replying to tweets by blue check accounts from time to time -- mostly political stuff. Every so often I get upwards of 50 likes on a reply. Is this a lot, comparatively? Asking because I'll take any validation I can get at this point in my life!
posted by schwinggg! at 5:00 AM PST - 12 comments

Good get to know you questions

So I have had two dates with a new man and it is looking promising, so I am considering going down to visit him in his city next weekend. What are some good conversation starters and get to know you questions I can use to keep the conversation flowing, as so far we have sometimes found it a bit hard. Context: both mid 30s, hetero and met on online dating app.
posted by EatMyHat at 3:27 AM PST - 11 comments

October 28

How do I tell a friend I don’t want to go to an event with her?

I have a relatively new friend who wants to hang out A Lot. I’m a certified introvert, and while I’m happy to hang out, I have a lot of friends that I want and need to make time for. Which brings me to tomorrow night. There’s a performance I’d like to go to. I would like to go alone and chat with whoever I run into. I would not like to go with anyone. How do I tell my friend who has expressed interest in going with me? [more inside]
posted by stoneweaver at 9:11 PM PST - 20 comments

MBAs, how did you learn to think and talk about your career?

I’ve noticed that people who attended fancy business schools tend to have a remarkable ability to project a personal brand. They sound very intentional in describing their career paths, which I assume comes from having done a considerable amount of introspection about their careers. MBAs, how did you develop this ability to project a cohesive personal brand? Is there a course in Communicating About Your Career 101? Thinking About Your Career 101? Tell me your ways! [more inside]
posted by saltypup at 7:26 PM PST - 11 comments

What is the story of Natalie Hemby's verse in "Highwomen"?

Verse 4 of "Highwomen" (by The Highwomen) is sung by Natalie Hemby. I understand the references in the other verses, but I am not sure what incident or historical person(s) this verse is about. [more inside]
posted by Emmy Rae at 7:20 PM PST - 4 comments

Where to eat fancy, non-spicy, vegetarian near Seattle?

My partner and I are celebrating and would like to find an extra special place to dine. Unfortunately, most of the fancier restaurants around Seattle tend to be unsuitable for a vegetarian who can't eat spicy food. [more inside]
posted by Cogito at 6:48 PM PST - 9 comments

What was this blog post on recent developments in text summarizers?

Within the past couple weeks I read something (a blog post, I think) describing how recent sophisticated, deep learning based text analysis methods did essentially no better than very simple algorithms. The point that stuck out was that for text summarizers, it was very hard to beat a summary consisting of the first three sentences of the document. Does this ring a bell?
posted by molla at 5:35 PM PST - 5 comments

National Park-adjacent weekend getaway near-ish LA?

I'm looking to get out of LA with my spouse late next month and am seeking a small town (like under 20k people) within driving distance that'd be good for a weekend getaway. [more inside]
posted by joechip at 4:06 PM PST - 11 comments

update my seasonal sounds!

I have a bunch of albums I like to listen to on my commute during fall and winter...but they're (/I'm) very much stuck in the aughts. What should I, an older millennial who wore a Jimmy Eat World t-shirt in her senior photos and never grew out of it, add to my list to bring it into the (gulp) 2020s? [more inside]
posted by goodbyewaffles at 3:56 PM PST - 23 comments

Event promotion on a shoestring

I convinced a spoken word star to stop in my town on his world tour, and the people who indicated they'd support me...kind of disappeared. What's the best way(s) to advertise? [more inside]
posted by intrepid_simpleton at 3:11 PM PST - 15 comments

Look into the camera... Talk to me.

Please give me recommendations of scenes from movies where characters look straight into the camera during a dialog scene. [more inside]
posted by war wrath of wraith at 2:58 PM PST - 23 comments

Digital Signage Software

I'm looking for non-subscription-based digital signage software and/or software that may not be made for it, but would do the trick [more inside]
posted by jonathanhughes at 2:57 PM PST - 10 comments

Carpal Tunnel Release Surgery, one month out...

I had Carpal Tunnel Release Surgery in my right (dominant) hand just over a month ago. How long does this take to heal? [more inside]
posted by sarajane at 2:01 PM PST - 2 comments

Best comic book news, reviews, etc?

Where are the best places to find news, reviews, etc. about comic books? [more inside]
posted by fryman at 1:22 PM PST - 7 comments

Another costume question...difficulty: pine cones

I have a large bucketful of small pine cones rescued from the lawn mower's path. I've seen some decorating ideas but thought it would be more fun to incorporate them into a costume. But my imagination is failing me. Any ideas? [more inside]
posted by mefireader at 12:59 PM PST - 14 comments

Searching for a wintertime side trip on my way to Montana...

I'm traveling from the Southeast coast of the US--in the dead of winter--for a couple of weeks visiting family in Whitefish, MT.; and I want to front load my trip by going somewhere else for several days first. I've done Seattle and the Olympic Peninsula, but never in the winter.....Suggestions? [more inside]
posted by swlabr at 12:27 PM PST - 4 comments

should I stop seeing my therapist?

The thing is, I very badly need therapy. But on the other hand, I am disappointed and upset by his failure to listen to me and am wondering if it constitutes negligence either ethically or professionally. [more inside]
posted by thereemix at 11:16 AM PST - 16 comments

Cheek kissing as a greeting in the US

I'm in the US, and I've recently had the great luck to meet a new group of friends who are wonderful. This is an a large urban area on the East Coast. Among this group, cheek kissing is a common greeting. It's not common for me, and I feel anxious about it, so I'm bean-plating it. Help this introvert kiss cheeks the right way -- details after the cut. [more inside]
posted by OrangeDisk at 9:50 AM PST - 18 comments

New Green Pals

I bought 4 small, unidentified houseplants from the grocery store. Can you help me identify them and figure out how to care for them? I'm trying to make a calendar to remind me when to water or rotate or fertilize. Thanks! [more inside]
posted by FirstMateKate at 9:46 AM PST - 5 comments

How to share admin responsibility for a neighbourhood's online forum

For several years I’ve run an online forum for my neighbourhood and I’d like to make sure I’m not the only person who has the virtual keys to the website, in case I go under the proverbial bus. But I’m not sure how best to manage this. [more inside]
posted by fabius at 9:42 AM PST - 3 comments

English speakers in foreign language films?

We watched the Argentinian horror movie Terrified last night. The movie wasn't very good, but it featured something that I don't think I've seen in many other movies, and now I'm looking for more examples. [more inside]
posted by cakelite at 9:22 AM PST - 21 comments

What must we do in London?

We're a U.S. couple in our early 40s, traveling to London for four days in early December (just the two of us, no kids). This is our first-ever trip there. What are the absolute must-sees/must-dos? We are open to just about anything, and cost is generally not an issue. Thanks!
posted by Conrad Cornelius o'Donald o'Dell at 9:06 AM PST - 40 comments

Los Angeles Area for Dummy

So... what should I do when I'm in LA next month? [more inside]
posted by Green With You at 9:01 AM PST - 16 comments

Polite response to news of death morphs into performing at funeral. Help

I responded politely to an email describing funeral arrangements for someone I knew very vaguely as part of a hobby group seven or eight years ago. I hadn't even heard that he'd died. Now I'm getting emails about performing a song at the funeral with a few other members of the group. I wasn't even sure that I would attend the funeral but plans are underway and it seems I've been volunteered. Can I (or should I) get out of this without looking like a dick? [more inside]
posted by doornoise at 8:44 AM PST - 9 comments

Active jobs for the over 50 set.

Are you over 50, maybe almost 60 like me? I'm looking to set aside (part of) my graphic design work and take up some part-time work. I'd like to NOT be at a computer. I'd like to be out working with others. I'd like to work part time. I'd like to make at least $400/hr... ok ... well maybe something better than minimum wage anyway. [more inside]
posted by ecorrocio at 8:36 AM PST - 9 comments

Help me stop the hate

I'm new to rage, what happens next? [more inside]
posted by Twinge at 8:20 AM PST - 17 comments

Best online tool to receive donations

I'm on the board of a recently established nonprofit charitable organization, and we're trying to find the best tool to solicit donations via our website. What is the current best option for this? [more inside]
posted by aaanastasia at 7:39 AM PST - 9 comments

What is a dog-less life like?

I lost the best dog last week, who was by my side for 16 years. If you lost a dog and then decided not to get another dog, how did you cope and transition? [more inside]
posted by inevitability at 7:24 AM PST - 14 comments

Pithy pitches for public poll, please!

I am starting a business and am looking for public feedback in order to decide between 2 branding styles. Can you help me think of some quick hooky pitches to elicit participation? [more inside]
posted by i_mean_come_on_now at 7:14 AM PST - 1 comment

Should we move neighborhoods for more friends?

We live in a neighborhood where we haven’t made friends and where our kids have not made real friends, despite there being lots of kids! We are considering moving to a more expensive home in a neighborhood where we already have some friends and where we know they regularly get together; however, we aren’t sure if “moving for friends” is going to be worth it or smart. We love our low mortgage, our yard and our location, but the other neighborhood would surely improve both our social life and our kids’ chance of making friends. Would you move for friends? [more inside]
posted by flower777 at 7:04 AM PST - 23 comments

New England colleges with engineering and green space, not too big?

My son is looking for Goldilocks: a small college (5k-10k) in New England (less than four hours from Providence, say) with some green space on campus (to play frisbee with friends), where he can study (probably mechanical) engineering. Any suggestions? [more inside]
posted by wenestvedt at 6:21 AM PST - 30 comments

How can I buy a UK appliance and have it shipped to the US?

My wife and I are trying to purchase a Candy washing machine. We can’t seem to find an easy-ish way to purchase and deliver to us here in the USA. Does anyone know of a British importer, /exporter, or freight forwarder, or LCL service? [more inside]
posted by karst at 6:19 AM PST - 11 comments

October 27

Emotional support on losing academic science career / London therapist

After being precarious for years, my partner's academic career in science has finally collapsed. She is in her early 40s and has been in academia all her life. She is depressed, angry and miserable. She finds it hard to imagine being happy in a different career, even if she could successfully transition into one, which will be extremely challenging. I am trying to help and support her but I am out of my depth. I am looking for advice from people who have been through this, helped someone else who has, or who can recommend a therapist who has experience in this area - ideally in London, but remotely as a last resort. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 11:54 PM PST - 19 comments

Software for home finances

What software would you recommend for keeping up, tracking, and paying home finances for a married couple in America? Ideally it would have desktop and mobile version that syncs, allows multiple users, connect with banks, track bills, income and taxes. Whatcha got?
posted by anonymous at 11:53 PM PST - 4 comments

Sexual assault, but need references from my attacker

Took my mentor teacher out for dinner to ask him to write me a reference. Obviously I should have had my guard much more up. But I never thought of him as a potential threat. [Content Warning: details below the fold] [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 11:53 PM PST - 10 comments

In the US, where would corporation documents be physically stored?

Let's say a character in a story, pre-internet era, is investigating an anonymous corporation like an LLC that owns a real estate property. Where would Articles of Incorporation or the like be physically stored? [more inside]
posted by lewedswiver at 10:43 PM PST - 9 comments

Help give me the tools to be a great cat and dog owner

S o my life situation is going to be more amenable to pet ownership soon. I'd like to start getting informed, as that will help me plan when and how I want to get pets :) more details inside! [more inside]
posted by wooh at 8:44 PM PST - 10 comments

Help me find some Dutch dish towels

Recently on a trip to Amsterdam I bought a couple of dish towels like these (on the right), at a drugstore, for a really non fancy price. Got home to discover that they are absolutely the finest, Platonic ideal of dish towel, and now I would like to buy many more. I'm having trouble finding any that are exactly like these - the ones I am seeing online in Dutch souvenir shops all have cutesy details like windmills and kissing children. Can you help?
posted by Miko at 4:59 PM PST - 7 comments

How to be a more resilient job searcher?

Okay, I'm back again. I've been trying to job search for a new position since getting my MLIS in April and I've kicked my job search into gear last week because my hours at my current job have been cut. I've been feeling a lot of momentum. I also have *so much* anxiety with regards to my job search that, I think it really takes away from my ability to actually apply for jobs and see what I have to offer clearly. How can I do this and be less anxious? [more inside]
posted by VirginiaPlain at 4:11 PM PST - 13 comments

where can i post and lightly organize a ton of old art?

i've got about ten years of digital art that i posted to tumblrs to that i deleted in fits of depression and will continue to delete in fits of depression, but the art is still really good and i like to revisit it and also share it with other people sometimes. i like the tag system of tumblr where i can categorize by multiple things but also see everything a pic is tagged as. what other sites can i do this on? [more inside]
posted by gaybobbie at 2:47 PM PST - 2 comments

Looking for a shortcut to eating right

I am an extremely picky and emotional eater, and I am exhausted by my usually unsuccessful efforts to change the way I eat so that I am eating healthy and nutritious foods. [more inside]
posted by prefpara at 1:44 PM PST - 17 comments

What is the reasoning for NOT having a "low coolant" light in many cars?

I drive a popular Japanese car from the previous decade, and am always in the habit of checking coolant levels since I appear to have a slow leak. Apparently this car does not have a "low coolant" light (like all cars, it has an engine temperature gauge/warning), and plugging in "low coolant light..." in Google will autofill with American and European cars, but no Japanese models. Of course, we can speculate about certain cars' reliability leading more people to Google them, but what's the reasoning behind many cars not having coolant warning lights?
posted by Seeking Direction at 12:36 PM PST - 4 comments

Pilates at home

I'm looking for recommendations for a specific type of pilates/pilates fusion/workout video. Key features: fast-paced, high energy, difficult workout, set to fun and energetic music. [more inside]
posted by lomes at 12:28 PM PST - 5 comments

Help me explain my anxiety.

I have always been an anxious person, and it is only quite recently that I've twigged onto the fact that not everyone lives life tensely waiting for the next bad thing to happen. I finally started therapy after resisting it a while. I did not expect to magically feel better immediately, but I do think that perhaps I'm not communicating well enough with my therapist about how debilitating my anxiety can be. How do I do that better? Details below. [more inside]
posted by Nieshka at 12:15 PM PST - 18 comments

What's the most derivative, cliche novel writing software or ... ?

Asking for a friend who's trying to find "... novel writing software--or, say, a book or a website--that will guide me through structuring the most derivative, cliche, plot-and-character driven kind of novel? I want to mess with it... or maybe not. Based on my research so far, Novel Factory seems like a good option, but I'd like to know what else might be useful."
posted by philip-random at 10:59 AM PST - 4 comments

How do I get around Puerto Rico in November as ethically as possible?

A: Are there any major concerns driving to Aguadilla from San Juan these days? How about El Junque? Is the ferry to Vieques functioning? B: Anybody know of anything useful I could be doing when I get there? I will definitely have to spend at least a little time doing touristy stuff, but would feel better if I could usefully do a day of work. I have some skills in both the trades and IT. [more inside]
posted by aspersioncast at 10:09 AM PST - 2 comments

Best non-Amazon price on spice jars

I need about 50 spice jars that can hold about 3/8 of a cup of spice. That's about 1.5 oz of spice, depending on density. Is there someplace I can get them cheaply that isn't Amazon?
posted by donpardo at 9:47 AM PST - 17 comments

Morning Meditation Without Tears

I need a 20-30 minute guided meditation that I can do every morning, in bed, upon waking. I'm allergic to affirmations and most guided imagery. I used to enjoy metta meditation, and to tolerate mindfulness, but a recent mental health downswing has made both of those difficult. I don't know what other options I have. I'm looking for concrete suggestions, ideally of tracks I can either download or listen to online, but if you have ideas for general techniques I'll take those too - I just need something that won't make me feel worse. [more inside]
posted by Acheman at 8:58 AM PST - 21 comments

When do strikes win?

What research do we have on when strikes are successful for the striking workers? I have been reading a lot of theory on this, but surely there are studies that can point quantitatively to patterns, or indicate what different factors exist in most winning vs losing strike campaigns? [more inside]
posted by latkes at 7:14 AM PST - 6 comments

Who regulates government managers?

What is the cure for micro-managers? [more inside]
posted by The_imp_inimpossible at 2:45 AM PST - 6 comments

Verify Landlord

I am currently looking for a place to rent in the tight market of Bay Area, California. I've found a nice place listed by the current tenants. I will be taking over the lease and at the same time signing a new lease. The property is managed by a company for the Landlord. [more inside]
posted by gloturtle at 2:04 AM PST - 20 comments

October 26

Seeking L'Occitane Almond Milk Veil Body Lotion Dupe

Looking for a cheaper duplicate of L'Occitane Almond Milk Veil Body Lotion. [more inside]
posted by whitelotus at 10:01 PM PST - 7 comments

What is pride?

Someone I love dearly, and who loves me, and who's opinions I hold in high regard says that I don't have enough pride. Assuming we're not talking hubris and ego, what does pride feel like, or look like? [more inside]
posted by MuChao at 9:03 PM PST - 18 comments

Should I bother reapplying?

I just noticed that a job I previously applied to and received an interview for last month was reposted. I think I should re-apply, because I need to get a new job ASAP, but I'm also worried that it would be a waste of time and maybe I'd look stupid to re-apply? Metafilter, what should I do? Also, how do you address this in the cover letter? [more inside]
posted by VirginiaPlain at 8:04 PM PST - 25 comments

Help us hire a wedding planner and a photographer!

Mr. Nat and I are in the middle of planning our wedding, which will be in a small town in Arizona in March. We've tried to hire planners and photographers but with no success-- so we turn to you for suggestions. Do you know a good planner or photographer who works in AZ? Can you tell us where to find one? [more inside]
posted by nat at 7:58 PM PST - 4 comments

How to get rid of drug dealers?

Some drug dealers have moved into a tent across the street from our local public library. This coincides with a sharp uptick in drug ODs in the neighborhood (I recently called the police twice in 1 day for ODs; one of the people was already dead.) I am certain the tent is not a legitimate homeless encampment, but rather a station for drug dealing, based on what I've seen and how it's set up. What tactics are there for me to get the city to pay attention and get rid of the tent? I realize that in this day and age I can't stop drug dealing or the opiod OD epidemic single handedly, but I would like it to be at least not across the street from a library that needs to stay safe for kids and everyone else.
posted by anonymous at 5:35 PM PST - 18 comments

Is this State Fair toy a cartoon character?

I saw these lobsters yesterday at a fair and they looked so familiar yet....I couldn't figure out if they were supposed to be anyone in particular. They are called "Clawdius" which doesn't seem to be any licensed character, unless I've missed one. They do remind me of Domo.
posted by 41swans at 4:42 PM PST - 2 comments

How does a leak start?

I woke up this morning to find water covering the floor in my bathroom, caused by a leak where the water supply line connects to the fill valve at the toilet. I’ve replaced the supply line and fill valve and the leak is resolved, but now I’m curious - how does a leak go from nonexistent one day to filling the floor of our bathroom, literally overnight? (I used the toilet at about 11:30 pm and again at about 7:30 am, so about 8 hours elapsed.) My prior experience with this kind of leak has been that they usually start very small; this wasn’t catastrophic but it wasn’t a little drip that got worse over time.
posted by devinemissk at 2:56 PM PST - 7 comments

Should I go to the hospital?

YANMD, I know. I have “non-breastfeeding” mastitis. I got antibiotics yesterday and have taken two doses - I’m two hours away from the next dose. I’ve been in bed all day with a fever And now a headache. I drank some lemonade and a little water throughout the day and I just feel really awful. I’m worried about sepsis. Do you think I should go to the emergency room?
posted by dawkins_7 at 1:48 PM PST - 11 comments

Information about the ballot initiatives in NYC election?

It's voting time in NYC again, and this year it's possible to vote early at locations throughout the five boroughs. When it comes to the elections themselves, I know who I'll be voting for, but I was surprised to learn that there are five Yes/No initiatives on this ballot. [more inside]
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 1:26 PM PST - 6 comments

What are some famous recorded manic talks?

As family of a bipolar person I was struck by the videos of manic Kanye at TMZ and in the Oval Office. Are there other famous videos/recordings/written episodes of people speaking during manic or psychotic episodes?
posted by hungrytiger at 1:22 PM PST - 11 comments

Do I need a buyer's agent?

I want to move to another city and I'm interested in a house I found on Trulia. Can I contact one of the agents on Trulia? I assume I shouldn't contact the listing agent since they have a conflict of interest, but would one of the others be okay? [more inside]
posted by pinochiette at 12:23 PM PST - 7 comments

Ladylike ultraviolence

For reasons, I would like to watch some media with women being brutally protective (vengeful works too). I got back from Terminator Dark Fate last night and it was exactly what I needed right now on this theme. Feed me please. [more inside]
posted by Iteki at 12:04 PM PST - 48 comments

Here we go again....

In the stage musical "Mamma Mia," can anyone answer some questions about 'canon' regarding the character of Rosie (one of Donna's longtime friends)? [more inside]
posted by I_Love_Bananas at 11:48 AM PST - 5 comments

Vinegar for the faint of tongue

While in Germany and the Czech Republic, I noticed that the vinegars used in salad dressings and preserved foods like sauerkraut did not set my tongue off like their counterparts in the United States. What could be different about these vinegars to make them milder? [more inside]
posted by oxisos at 11:18 AM PST - 9 comments

How old is this very old manuscript page?

I want to know how old this is. The information I currently have on it is a small label that says "Breviary / psalter on vellum hand painted circa. 1300 France". I don't think it's that old but I'm not an expert. Anything you could tell me about it would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!
posted by Joan Rivers of Babylon at 10:35 AM PST - 4 comments

Japan trip in 2020 - should we avoid the Olympics period?

We're planning a 2-week trip to Japan in 2020. Should we avoid the Olympics period? Or embrace it? [more inside]
posted by sleepcrime at 9:55 AM PST - 10 comments

Where to start with Meditation

I have gone through every treatment under the sun to treat my cognitive anxiety and racing thoughts. I am ready to give meditation a try again. I have questions [more inside]
posted by Alvin80 at 9:51 AM PST - 14 comments

My Brain Is Very Sluggish. Help!

I am having a very hard time with my brain. I am not sharp at all. I am having trouble communicating, comprehending etc. I feel perpetually sluggish mentally. Details inside [more inside]
posted by kbbbo at 9:38 AM PST - 17 comments

Tired of being the DUFF, or, how to be content as a 4

[CW : body image/beauty standards/sexism] For most of my life I (a cis woman) have consistently been the least conventionally attractive member of any friend group I'm a member of. I'm tired of being upset about it, but also feel like calmly accepting it makes me vulnerable to manipulation, mockery, and/or pity. How can I keep my friends without looking like a dupe who doesn't realize she's the DUFF? [more inside]
posted by blessmycottonsocks at 6:58 AM PST - 37 comments

cheap sleep/leisure bras for small band, big breasts

I wear something in the range of 32DDD/34DD and I'm looking for an affordable sleep/around-the-house bra that will be big enough in the cups and small enough in the band, especially something doesn't create uniboob. [more inside]
posted by needs more cowbell at 5:49 AM PST - 19 comments

How does one person direct an entire TV episode?

I'm coming up to the end of Season 1 of Succession and each episode is listed as being directed by a different person. Does this mean that this person was present for the filming of every scene in that episode or is it more that they are in charge of an overall feel once the scenes have been shot? (No spoilers inside) [more inside]
posted by jontyjago at 1:55 AM PST - 6 comments

Pedestrian Accident Question

I was in a car accident recently where I hit a pedestrian. The person said they were fine, but I called the police, they had him looked at by paramedics and said they wouldn’t be filing a police report because there was no damage to the vehicle and no injury to him. The police didn’t ask me for my insurance information but I’m unsure if that was because they were able to access it electronically. Should I contact my insurance company to inform them of the accident? I was told not to by someone who is not a lawyer. I’ve had fender benders where everybody exchanges insurance but nobody calls, but this seems different - for instance, what about coverage for future liability if injuries develop over time?
posted by anonymous at 12:18 AM PST - 5 comments

My work laptop got stolen. Whose insurance is liable?

My bag fell off my bike during my commute and got picked up by someone who swiftly used all my credit cards and (to the best of my knowledge) discarded my bag and its contents. Unfortunately, the bag included my work laptop. Is it reasonable for my employer to hold me liable for the cost of the laptop? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 12:17 AM PST - 10 comments

October 25

How do you feel when you're being bullied? I mean, feel in your body?

I've encountered a situation that has (surprisingly) evoked physical responses that remind me of being bullied as a child/young person - sensations that I haven't experienced in many years. Mainly: nausea; a sense of my limbs tingling; a lightness in my feet, but not in a good way - more a sense that I'm not connecting to the ground. I wonder if this is a common response? [more inside]
posted by goofyfoot at 9:16 PM PST - 13 comments

it's over

My boyfriend is leaving me. Please help me figure out how not to be destroyed by this. [more inside]
posted by buckminsterfullerene at 8:28 PM PST - 20 comments

Buying a car in Los Angeles

Hints and tips for buying a car (likely used) in Los Angeles? Good/bad dealers? [more inside]
posted by klangklangston at 7:37 PM PST - 4 comments

Have you ever had a weekly commute? Did it drive you nuts?

I currently have a long, tedious daily commute to work. For various reasons, instead of moving closer to work I'm considering moving even farther, renting a room close to work and commuting back and forth on Fridays/Sundays. If you've ever done this sort of commute, how did it work out for you? Especially looking for insight from folks who were single/unattached at the time (no SO or family in either location).
posted by btfreek at 6:11 PM PST - 18 comments

Where does Furio shop?

I’d like to get a shirt like Furio (from the Sopranos). Looks like silk with printed on scrollwork, etc. What is this called and where can I buy one?
posted by stillmoving at 5:03 PM PST - 2 comments

Help me find a new activity in NYC!

I want to work with my body/hands, meet people (preferably nearby). I don't have a lot of money and I prefer a regularly scheduled thing. I live in Inwood/Washington Heights. My own preliminary ideas and existing skills/interests within. Throw your ideas at me! [more inside]
posted by redwaterman at 4:06 PM PST - 14 comments

Trashy novel from the 70s -- what's the title and author?

There's a book with a plot very similar to John Fowles' "The Collector" but way waaaaaay trashier. I thought it was by Harold Robbins, but apparently not and OF COURSE I also can't remember the title. Can you? (TW: Sexual assault) [more inside]
posted by janey47 at 3:30 PM PST - 3 comments

We all hate meetings

I take my dog to the office regularly, and for the most part she's a model coworker. The one snag is that she's started to freak out when meetings in conference rooms adjourn. How come, and how can I work on this with her? [more inside]
posted by invitapriore at 1:55 PM PST - 13 comments

iPhone Buyer Claims to Need My iCloud Password

Sold an iPhone 7 (with iOs 12) via eBay. Buyer said she needed password. I was 99% sure I'd reset the phone to "welcome screen", but sent her device password. Now she's asking for icloud password "to be able to disconnect from your account." I absolutely signed out of iCloud, Find My Phone, and iTunes (triple checked). What's my next move?
posted by Quisp Lover at 1:54 PM PST - 9 comments

What did people eat? Central England c. 600AD edition

I am trying to find reliable/accurate information on what the inhabitants of central England - the area around the South Midlands especially - ate around 550 to 650AD. What was their diet? What did they hunt for food, or grow themselves? What did they drink? Looking for accuracy - there's a lot of hazily speculative information I've been digging up online that isn't of reliable quality. Bonus points, therefore, for links to good sources; thank you.
posted by Wordshore at 1:44 PM PST - 7 comments

Plan for wrangling family winter boots?

We are approaching the season of Too Many Boots. They don't fit in regular shoe-cubby storage, and they are frequently too dirty/wet to pile in bins. Anybody have a great scheme for keeping a family's worth of oddly-sized snow and street boots tidy, organized and accessible for day-to-day wear? [more inside]
posted by Bardolph at 1:23 PM PST - 7 comments

Cisco IP Communicator on modern Mac?

Does anyone have a way to get the Cisco IP Communicator softphone (v. 8.6.6.0) working on a modern Mac (OS 10.13.6, High Sierra)? [more inside]
posted by wenestvedt at 12:46 PM PST - 3 comments

Buying a chess set is hard

I'd like to have a nice (pretty, and well-made) chess set at home. I'd be willing to spend perhaps $200-$300 for a wooden board and pieces. However, I have no chess store near me, and large online sites overwhelm me to complete paralysis by the number of options. It seems a silly problem, but I've been trying for years and always give up in indecision without buying anything; can anyone find a way to simplify the decision for me? [more inside]
posted by Wolfdog at 11:40 AM PST - 16 comments

Favorite tours of Mexico?

I am very interested in going to Mexico and am looking for any tours (from a day to a full trip) you enjoyed! [more inside]
posted by clarinet at 11:04 AM PST - 7 comments

Dealing with crush dating someone?

I have a crush on a friend I talk to a lot who has recently started dating someone. Despite the fact that I categorically will not date my friend for various reasons, and do not even really want to, I am still upset. How do I deal with my feelings? Note: I am looking for a therapist.
posted by anonymous at 10:22 AM PST - 5 comments

Do I really need non-owner's car insurance?

I just sold my only car, and I'm not planning to get another one for a while. Definitely not in the next 3 months, maybe not even in the next year. I've heard of people getting smacked with very high rates when they renew if they let their insurance lapse during a period of non-ownership, even with a good driving record. How do? I'm in the U.S., spending time in a handful of different states, currently in California for the next 3 months. [more inside]
posted by danceswithlight at 8:20 AM PST - 6 comments

Standby HELOC benefits

My bank is pitching a HELOC as a source of standby liquidity. We bank at a relationship level where it wouldn’t cost us anything, other than the hard inquiry on our credit report. Is this worthwhile? [more inside]
posted by myaskme at 7:49 AM PST - 10 comments

Splitting time between two cities together?

My spouse is interviewing for a position based in New City, a place that we've always enjoyed visiting and have idly dreamed of moving to in the past. We're seriously entertaining the idea of keeping our home in Current City but also getting a place in New City and effectively becoming "working snowbirds". Have you split time between two places as a couple while still working, and if so, how did it work out? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 7:29 AM PST - 12 comments

Forum comments by ex employee

An ex-employee is making unhelpful, inaccurate and potentially damaging comments about the company they were just laid off from. What's some ways to approach this? [more inside]
posted by diode at 6:34 AM PST - 16 comments

To apostrophe or not to apostrophe, that is the question

The missus hit me with a question this morning on the correct use of apostrophes. After mulling over my answer, I'm not sure if I was entirely correct, so I now lean on the brave copy editors of the hivemind. [more inside]
posted by Thorzdad at 5:56 AM PST - 14 comments

Nothing says love and respect like a little public shaming

My child's middle school (5th-8th grade) has a thing where they have an ice cream party 3 times a year and if you haven't been tardy/absent more than 5 times in that period or had any disciplinary infractions. [more inside]
posted by MadMadam at 4:54 AM PST - 45 comments

Could food writing be a profitable niche?

I am a freelance writer looking to pivot from arts and culture to food. I see food writing as potentially an emerging trend with many writing opportunities popping up. To niche down would help me to strategise my nonfiction career via a clear speciality rather than the oversaturated market of literature and art. [more inside]
posted by foxmardou at 4:25 AM PST - 15 comments

Time Dilation. At what distance travelled does it become a thing?

I'm writing science fiction. I've been trying to avoid faster than light speed travel, but it's become impossible to get the story to work without it. How do I calculate how time dilation affects my characters? I suspect I am drastically misunderstanding some basic aspect of time dilation so apologies in advance. [more inside]
posted by Zumbador at 1:01 AM PST - 21 comments

October 24

Ouch.

I've started running and every. single. part of my body hurts. What now? [more inside]
posted by Toddles at 9:40 PM PST - 25 comments

Fright Fest in Vallejo, CA hours of op

Can I get into Six Flags to see the haunted houses if I have purchased a VIP fast pass for the haunted houses? And if so when? [more inside]
posted by ABlanca at 7:29 PM PST - 3 comments

What happened???

Windows 10. I was in a directory, looking at files and other directories. I wanted to delete a file, but I inadvertently deleted a directory. [more inside]
posted by ubiquity at 7:27 PM PST - 6 comments

Switching from the academic track to trade work in your 30s

I've been unemployed for a while, and lately people have started asking me to work on handyman-type projects for them. I seem to be good at it, and I'm considering whether I should try to pursue that kind of work more seriously. Have you, or has anyone you know, gone into this kind of work? I'd like to get a sense of what I'm looking at in practical terms. [more inside]
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 6:55 PM PST - 19 comments

How to move a wheelchair without lifting it?

I need to get a wheelchair from the trunk of a SUV to the passenger side door with minimal effort. [more inside]
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 6:36 PM PST - 11 comments

Painting wooden earrings...but how

I have some wooden earrings that I would like to paint. What kinds of paint will be safe? How to finish them? [more inside]
posted by Frowner at 6:07 PM PST - 3 comments

New iPhone for my tech-averse partner

My partner's iPhone SE has finally cracked itself into oblivion. Since I last surveyed the iPhone scene (when I was buying my iPhone 8 a couple years back) the array of options has expanded and I'm having trouble making a decision. [more inside]
posted by codhavereturned at 5:25 PM PST - 13 comments

Tech recs for the following specs

I am on the lookout for two separate tech recommendations: the perfect GPS app for an anxious driver and a new computer. Snowflakes inside. [more inside]
posted by coppermoss at 4:56 PM PST - 1 comment

Do I really need the 5k car maintenance service?

Dummy car owner question: If my oil change lasts for 10k miles/1 year, do I need to take my car in for maintenance at the 5k/6 month mark as well? [more inside]
posted by serelliya at 4:22 PM PST - 13 comments

Coping with criticism

I really struggle to cope with criticism. I generally have a positive view of myself and am accountable and reliable etc, but I find when I receive criticism, even when it’s constructive, it really hurts. I feel like there is no benefit to people saying that, as I have already done my best to produce a good product, and you can’t be expected to do better than your best, right? [more inside]
posted by EatMyHat at 4:19 PM PST - 35 comments

Resources for higher ed budget crisis

My institution of higher education, like many, is facing a budget crisis. I’m part of a team tasked with coming up with ideas for how to address it. I’m hoping someone can point me to a sort of catalog of ideas, big and small, for ways institutions of higher ed have found to save money.
posted by HotToddy at 3:55 PM PST - 9 comments

Where/How can I get a Samsung J2 Pro?

Last year, I saw that Samsung had created a phone that can't connect to the Internet. For a lot of reasons, I think this is a great idea. Then I saw the ad for the new "Light" phone, and realized I could get a J2 pro that does the same thing, used, for about $250 less. [more inside]
posted by CollectiveMind at 3:09 PM PST - 4 comments

Do cats like the taste of Comfortis tablets?

Does your cat eat it readily, or do you end up having to "pill" him/her? My vet says Bear is too big for Revolution (he's huge), so I need to use Comfortis, but I'm not sure he'll want to eat the tablet. Any anecdotal evidence that they are yummy? He's a food and treat loving cat luckily. Oh and cat tax.
posted by bluesky78987 at 2:57 PM PST - 13 comments

Government Job - How to explain gap in resume?

Got an interview for a position I really want; and then they followed up with asking me for references. Now they have called me asking about my resume and to explain some gaps...I need to write it in their notes; not sure how to proceed? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:50 PM PST - 7 comments

How do I process bleak retirement news?

A friend posted an article that hit me hard. I'm on the cusp of GenX and Millennial and cannot save 40% for retirement. Talk me off the ledge. [more inside]
posted by crunchy potato at 1:58 PM PST - 26 comments

Enough With Performance Metrics at School

Where can I find middle schools and high schools that offer a quality education without tests, grades, excessive homework, or a competitive environment befitting a sports tournament? [more inside]
posted by Dansaman at 1:22 PM PST - 17 comments

Talk to Me About Eyeglasses

Warby Parker vs David Kind vs Zenni vs Shuron [more inside]
posted by spikeleemajortomdickandharryconnickjrmints at 1:14 PM PST - 32 comments

I hate a heavy phone

So my beloved iPhone SE got run over and I guess I have to go out and look for a new phone. Are there any iPhones that are close to the SE in size & weight, maybe ones that aren't in stores anymore but they're still for legitimate sale (like I can buy them from someplace I've already heard of?) Or should I just go out to Best Buy and just get whichever one has the best hand feel? [more inside]
posted by bleep at 12:06 PM PST - 12 comments

If my tablet is water resistant, is it also sweat resistant?

I've got a case to protect against drops etc, but not one of those sort-of laminate coverings that protects the screen itself. Sweat all over it when I'm working out, and wondering if the salinity or any other quality of sweat might be harmful. Thanks
posted by BadgerDoctor at 11:30 AM PST - 1 comment

Who is responsible for the cost of temporarily vacant work housing?

Stuck with the cost of out-of-state work housing while on medical leave at home. Is this reasonable? [more inside]
posted by a moisturizing whip at 11:25 AM PST - 6 comments

Help me describe an out-of-style 80's sweater type

I do not have the words to describe or search for a type of sweater I used to see frequently many years ago. It seems to have disappeared into the mists of time along with ultra-thin ties and Members Only jackets. Please name it and point me to a picture. [more inside]
posted by zaixfeep at 11:03 AM PST - 20 comments

Success after 30?

Asking for a friend: You spent your 20s beset by addiction and mental health issues, working shitty service industry jobs. You have a few semesters of a an unmarketable degree under your belt, but never finished. In your 30’s, you became stable, happy and healthy. What did your path to a career and financial stability look like? Tell me your success stories of starting Adulthood after 30! [more inside]
posted by Grandysaur at 10:56 AM PST - 15 comments

Who are the great re-framers of past and present?

Its seems that throughout history and in the present day, great leaders have used the concept of re-framing of issues to win followers and achieve their goals. [more inside]
posted by jacobean at 10:19 AM PST - 5 comments

One afternoon in Brooklyn - what's the latest and greatest?

I'll be in NYC (specifically, Williamsburg) the afternoon of Monday October 28th w/ nothing in particular to do. What's the most not-to-be-missed thing happening right now that I could conceivably do during this time? I'll be arriving around lunch time, and will need to be back at National Sawdust in Williamsburg by around 7 or so. [more inside]
posted by nosila at 10:12 AM PST - 3 comments

I want to hear this song again but can't find it anywhere

Help me find a song by an independent artist, Toddy, titled "Lil' Birdies". Every so often the chorus pops into my head and I need to get this earworm out. Unfortunately it's been impossible to find it streaming anywhere. [more inside]
posted by Fuego at 9:09 AM PST - 2 comments

How can I delete Facebook and keep my Spotify account?

If I signed up for Spotify using my Facebook account (10 years ago), can I separate the two and delete Facebook while keeping my Spotify account (with 100s of playlists) intact? I'm thinking I am going to have to delete my Spotify account and start over (or delete it permanently too...) [more inside]
posted by mrgrimm at 9:05 AM PST - 8 comments

Inherent bias by design.

Please help me identify examples of inherent bias in the design of material culture. [more inside]
posted by signal at 7:39 AM PST - 65 comments

Can we commit to life as NYC renters for the foreseeable future?

We live in NYC, more or less happily. I'm also pretty sure we won't be able to buy an apartment here. Is it crazy to live life as renters for the foreseeable future? [more inside]
posted by zoomorphic at 7:31 AM PST - 18 comments

Could my chest and shoulders be getting wider?

My shoulders, upper arms, and chest seem wider than they used to. I'd like to determine if this is something that could actually be happening to me physically, as opposed to an inaccurate perception of my body based on some sort of dysphoria or other non-physical reason. [more inside]
posted by cheapskatebay at 7:13 AM PST - 10 comments

Does it make sense to be a Fellow of the Royal Society of the Arts?

Hey Mefites: I'm considering joining as a fellow of the Royal Society of the Arts, which purports to be a group of 30k people focused on "supporting innovation in creative learning and development, public services and communities and economy, enterprise and manufacturing". Any help in deciding on whether or not the group actually does anything for its members and society would be helpful. [more inside]
posted by JiffyQ at 5:55 AM PST - 2 comments

Spraypaint still tacky after 15 hours (HalloweenFilter)

As part of my Doctor Octopus costume, I am using gloss spray paint on vinyl flexible vent hose. This paint it still tacky to the touch after 15 hours. Can it be saved? [more inside]
posted by Paladin1138 at 4:17 AM PST - 12 comments

I dated my best friend, and now we're not friends anymore

TL;DR: My best friend and I tried dating, and eventually the mixed messages and come-here-go-away dynamic became toxic. I can likely never date him after all of this, but I'd still like to preserve our friendship, which--unlike our dating experience--was secure, healthy, and magnificent. But is that even possible? How can I handle this? Will we ever get back to normal? [more inside]
posted by Socolime at 2:33 AM PST - 33 comments

List of GOP Lawmakers Who Crashed Proceedings

Looking for a comprehensive list of the Republican members of Congress who disrupted the closed-door proceedings of the House impeachment inquiry today (Oct 23, 2019) Washington Post has these: Rep. Matt Gaetz, R-Fla Rep. Michael Waltz (R-Fla.) Rep. Andy Biggs (R-Ariz.) Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-Texas) Rep. K. Michael Conaway (R-Texas)
posted by anonymous at 1:17 AM PST - 6 comments

NYC where to find work immediately

Hi all, My family is in a tough situation. We have a 5 year old and both me and my husband are in between jobs at the same time. We need to find both jobs in our fields but also something that could be started immediately to get money coming in. So my question is two part- where to go to get temp work in our fields, and also where to go to get temp work for anything. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 1:16 AM PST - 9 comments

How do I best frame this situation with my HR department?

I directly manage a female employee who is being bizarrely targeted for her communication style by male upper management. I now have a meeting with HR to discuss the situation, and I want to ensure I use the right language when I speak to them. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 1:16 AM PST - 11 comments

Long Layover Kuala Lumpur: 11.5 hour edition

What is your best advice for a long, 11.5 hour layover, in Kuala Lumpur? [more inside]
posted by jadepearl at 12:40 AM PST - 7 comments

October 23

Help me cheaply paint a small kitchen table

The table top is made of bare particleboard, nasty crumbly stuff that I'd like to cover up with a strong layer of paint so I can continue using the table as kitchen counter space. [more inside]
posted by gray17 at 8:00 PM PST - 11 comments

Help me refresh

I have 6 weeks vacation from my job coming up. I won’t be traveling and I need suggestions on how to spend this time. Details inside. [more inside]
posted by everythingsokay at 7:24 PM PST - 13 comments

pies that keep well at room temp for a weekend

Asking for your favourite interesting sweet or savoury pie recipes that stay good at room temperature for 2-3 days? [more inside]
posted by tangaroo at 6:44 PM PST - 10 comments

Why do the methods for Indian pickle vs. sauerkraut seem so… opposite?

I'm new to fermenting, and just tried my first Indian lime pickle recipe this week. I'd like to understand why the recommended materials and methods (glass, sun, heat) are so opposite of what I saw for sauerkraut and kimchi (ceramic, dark, cool). [more inside]
posted by slenderloris at 3:24 PM PST - 11 comments

Help me find this old story from a (1950s?) horror comic...

A guy lives in a rooming house. He’s always carrying a large wooden crate on his shoulder. Another resident begins to wonder what’s in the crate. Could it be money? Jewels? Finally, the curious fellow follows the box-on-shoulder man and kills him with a vicious blow to the head. The arm is still holding tight to the crate, and when the murderer pries it loose, a second head - alive and angry - is revealed and extracts revenge.
posted by soulbarn at 2:43 PM PST - 2 comments

I want to see Amazon animals in their natural habitat

Everyone has different reasons for why they travel. For me, it is to see animals (that I've only seen in pictures or zoos) in their natural habitats, doing their things. A dream of mine has always been to see the denizens of the Amazon rainforest - sloths, capybaras, anteaters, and so on - and I now have my chance to do it! My travel requirements are [more inside]
posted by DrGail at 2:30 PM PST - 7 comments

My ex says he can't follow possession order because he has no space.

My ex and I have two kids together, one with significant special needs. He has chosen to live in a one-bedroom apartment with his new wife. This is partially because of finances but also he rushed into this arrangement with no eye towards his obligations. I am curious as to what my options look like. [more inside]
posted by kittyloop at 1:36 PM PST - 9 comments

Task manager that's a scheduler!

You know the phrase “work expands to fill the time allotted”? Well, I think I’m order to plan my work, I need to plan how my time is filled. I’m looking for a combination of a to-do list, a calendar, and a time tracker! Any suggestions? [more inside]
posted by many more sunsets at 12:32 PM PST - 5 comments

No, why are YOU reacting that way?

My very-soon-to-be husband and I fight in nearly the exact same way: I say something that I believe to be innocuous. He responds in (imo) an emotionally disproportionate way. I get upset that he responded so aggressively. He gets upset that I'm upset with him. Help me understand this and make it better. [more inside]
posted by orangesky4 at 12:24 PM PST - 36 comments

Identify this Farm Thing

I was at a farm recently and they had a greenhouse constructed with poly film pressed into an aluminum channel and held there with some S-shaped wire. Is this a thing, or did they DIY this? If it's a thing, what's it called? [more inside]
posted by odinsdream at 10:58 AM PST - 2 comments

iOS app that identifies terrain features

When we're out on the road, we often wonder about the hills, streams, and lakes that we see out the window. Google Maps, which we use for navigation, is really bad about labelling things that aren't roads, buildings, parks, and towns. Is there an app available on iOS that does a good job of that? Or a setting in Google Maps that I haven't discovered? Ideally, this app would also work well for road navigation, so I didn't have to switch back and forth.
posted by Jasper Fnorde at 10:39 AM PST - 3 comments

Arctic travels in winter

Is it pointless to visit the Arkhangelsk area in winter? [more inside]
posted by kolendra at 10:26 AM PST - 3 comments

Men's work shoes for plantar fasciitis, size 14?

I have a good friend who works many hours standing each day and also travels long haul by plane nearly weekly (think Korea one week, Europe the next). He has plantar fasciitis and size 14 feet. It's hard to find shoes big enough to fit him in the recommended brands mentioned in prior PF threads...most stop at 13. Plain black slip ons are ideal. He is tall, maybe 6'3", and moderately athletic. I got him some Superfeet insoles already, but please recommend whatever solutions you might use!
posted by OneSmartMonkey at 10:11 AM PST - 8 comments

I run a business as the only employee. Best way to do health insurance?

Open Enrollment is upon us and I have a family and we need some health insurance! We've been cruising on Cobra from my last full time gig, but now I have a strong business up and running and have set myself up with regular paychecks and other benefits — what about healthcare? Is it easier to just buy myself as an individual on the exchanges, or can I get a better deal as a business owner? [more inside]
posted by amoeba at 9:54 AM PST - 5 comments

How to organize incredibly detailed to-do lists?

Looking for to-do list methodology (maybe in the bullet journal world? or in some disability community?) for keeping incredibly, incredibly, maybe even excessively detailed to-do lists with pen and paper. [more inside]
posted by nebulawindphone at 9:28 AM PST - 21 comments

Road trip through Mexico : good idea or bad idea?

Road trip through Mexico : good idea or bad idea? And if it's a good idea, where should I go and what should I do? [more inside]
posted by panama joe at 9:26 AM PST - 13 comments

Mental Health Awareness campaign at work. People outing themselves.

I work for a large health insurance company. They are running a campaign for mental health awareness and posting write-ups by employees, with their pictures, talking about their mental illnesses. I'm off on disability due to a flare up of my bipolar II. I'm going back in December. I'm inclined to think this is a terrible idea, but I'm looking for your thoughts, and also articles written on the subject. We can't be the first workplace to do this, so there must be some things written about this type of campaign? [more inside]
posted by kitcat at 9:02 AM PST - 19 comments

Smushed older car next steps Part II

I was in a car accident and need to repair some mechanical damage, trying to decide next step as far as negotiation with insurance company and whether I should keep the car or not. [more inside]
posted by geegollygosh at 8:28 AM PST - 6 comments

Orca-moose predation

I saw recently a factoid about how orcas eat moose when they are swimming. How common is this as a way for moose to die? I am looking ideally for a number backed up by a citation.
posted by jeather at 7:57 AM PST - 5 comments

Drums are loud.

I'm in an indie pop band. We practice in a bedroom-sized room at our bass player's house. This was perfect until we got a new drummer who plays on a real kit - our last one used a cajon and some more acoustic-type stuff - and the drumming is SO LOUD in that small room. We're having a hard time hearing each other (and even ourselves, really). What can we do to dampen the volume of the drums? [more inside]
posted by something something at 7:26 AM PST - 17 comments

how to increase physical confidence

[Embarrassing question filter] I'm not exactly an outstanding physical specimen. As a result of high body weight, lack of coordination, weak ankles, and fear that I will fall and hurt myself, I lack any kind of physical courage and will often avoid activities that might require normal levels of functional fitness and coordination. Becoming more physically active has helped me a little with this but I seem to have reached a plateau and it's not currently possible to incorporate more exercise into my schedule than what I am already doing. How can I become braver, physically? [more inside]
posted by unicorn chaser at 6:26 AM PST - 33 comments

Start me up

I have been test-driving some new cars this fall. Several of them come with a feature called idle stop. [more inside]
posted by jtexman1 at 5:45 AM PST - 15 comments

Parenting with depression

Kids are still a hypothetical for me, but as a person who lives with depression, I wonder about how it might affect family life. What can a parent do to keep their depression from negatively affecting their children? Responses from children of parents with depression and from parents with depression themselves especially appreciated.
posted by ocherdraco at 5:31 AM PST - 27 comments

Who is good at ground-sourced heat pumps in Australia?

I have an offpeak electric 315 litre hot water service with a retrofitted solar thermal roof collector. It accounts for most of the electricity our house consumes, so I'm currently researching heat pump based replacements. The solar collector is still working well and I would like to keep it as part of any new hot water system. If you're in Australia - better still, if you're anywhere near East Gippsland - and have done the same thing, who did you deal with and were they any good? [more inside]
posted by flabdablet at 4:29 AM PST - 10 comments

"The interior is a prison unconscious"

I am enamored with the (single?) photo for My New House, by The Fall. I assume, since it's The Fall, that the photo was taken in Manchester, but other than that, I would like to know more about it - who took it, and when?
posted by facehugger at 3:31 AM PST - 6 comments

Dothismuch dot com

I have recently started planning my meals with Eat This Much. It's working well, and something about it really fits my brain - I like that I can see several days' plans at once, I like that I can build up routines etc, I like that it's a fairly simple layout that also allows you to drill down into more information, I like the fact that I can see when I've scheduled 'too much' because it adds things up in realtime, I REALLY like being able to drag and drop things around and tick them off. Now I want an online schedule planner which works in almost exactly the same way. I don't seem to be able to find one. [more inside]
posted by Acheman at 3:13 AM PST - 4 comments

October 22

What’s this book?

I am trying to remember the name of a book that I read maybe 10 years ago. I can only remember a few things. [more inside]
posted by sutel at 11:07 PM PST - 4 comments

Sorry for the delay... text message organizing question

How can I organize my text messages to make sure I don't forget to respond to them, even if I can't respond in the moment? Is there an app for iPhone that will let me organize or categorize the messages? [more inside]
posted by andreapandrea at 8:02 PM PST - 5 comments

Difficulty Level: Airport Bookshop

Going on a 5-day work trip tomorrow and did not have time to visit the library to get a book to take. What inevitably quite mainstream best seller books should I keep my eye out for when I visit the airport bookshop before my flight? Literary blizzard inside. [more inside]
posted by soren_lorensen at 7:39 PM PST - 26 comments

What is the best airline and hotel for small pets?

Do you have any experiences you can tell me you had with small pets on an airline? I am considering Delta or American Airlines. I have a small dog that I will be putting in a small kennel and have her with me under the seat ahead of me for the flight. [more inside]
posted by lynnie-the-pooh at 7:27 PM PST - 8 comments

Who makes this coat seen on Killing Eve?

Despite all the fashion reviews of the show, I can't seem to find information on this coat from Killing Eve Season 2 Episode 5. WARNING, SPOILERS IN THE ARTICLE. OK, here's the coat. There's a slideshow that's available right at the top. Yes, the entire article talks about the coat a bunch of times but fails to mention the designer! Arg! [more inside]
posted by ancient star at 7:01 PM PST - 2 comments

Wanted the job so much I got to the interview a week early

So... I messed up. I had an interview scheduled for a job I'm really excited about, but I got the date of the interview wrong and arrived A FULL WEEK before it was scheduled. (When I was on the phone with the hiring manager, she confirmed it was 'next week' but the email invitation, upon further inspection, had the week after.) I apologised profusely, mea culpa'd and tried to make light of it. But I have a sinking feeling that it's going to reflect so badly on me that it will ruin my chances for next week's interview. Any thoughts/advice from HR/hiring managers?
posted by awkwardpanda at 6:39 PM PST - 16 comments

Looking for catechisms or introductions to religions for total noobs

I have accidentally found myself to be the advisor to Lutheran friends' church library. The "Other Faiths" shelf is pretty empty. Given that I am dealing with Lutherans, explainers for other religions that take something close to the form of Luther's Small Catechism would be good (i.e., explicitly designed for children or those who are woefully ignorant of religious details). [more inside]
posted by ivan ivanych samovar at 4:48 PM PST - 11 comments

Gift for the woman who has every "thing" she wants

Looking for meaningful gift ideas for someone who leads a low-waste lifestyle. [more inside]
posted by legendarygirlfriend at 4:02 PM PST - 19 comments

Mac to PC, Gmail to Outlook: a time of mourning

Seeking resources to get up to speed in the PC world after a decade+ exclusively on Macs. Also shifting from an all-Google existence to Office 365. What videos, webinars, tutorials, articles will best prep me for the transition to different shortcuts, quick keys, mousing behavior, email navigation and more? [more inside]
posted by AnOrigamiLife at 3:47 PM PST - 2 comments

Give it another two weeks and we'll serve it at the bar.

Is there a time/temp that would kill most of the lactobacillus in kimchi without freezing or really cooking, some process akin to pasteurization or flash pasteurization? I'd rather not put it in the freezer or bring it all up to 145* (when most lactobacillus dies), because that would ruin my crunch! I have access to cryovac bags and restaurant equipment that can hold a precise temperature, hot or cold, for any amount of time, including a blast chiller that can cool things very quickly.
posted by Grandysaur at 3:10 PM PST - 10 comments

Latex Mattress Toppers 2.0

Expanding on this question and the suggestions for latex mattress toppers, I have a couple more questions about these miraculous toppers. [more inside]
posted by sarajane at 2:46 PM PST - 3 comments

Bootstrap CSS layout problem

I'm trying to make a Bootstrap CSS grid layout with some specific constraints. Can you help me? [more inside]
posted by no regrets, coyote at 2:09 PM PST - 3 comments

What's the best way to buy your music, professional musicians of MeFi?

I've always been fond of buying tapes/CDs at gigs, generally small to medium size venues not stadiums. A friend claims that downloading is better cause the musician isn't paying to produce the physical object. Downloading from a musician's own website vs. Bandcamp vs. Amazon make a difference? Something else I should know?? Help us out!
posted by HaveYouTriedRebooting at 2:05 PM PST - 5 comments

The kids are alright ...

I'm looking for examples of good music with a progressive political message by artists who are still under thirty. Mostly. [more inside]
posted by Kutsuwamushi at 1:53 PM PST - 19 comments

Taking lengthy trip to Vanuatu. Advice?

I'm going go Vanuatu, solo, from Nov 29 til early March on a dog sitting gig. I'll be staying in a house on the beach in Port Vila. Never been to the South Pacific before. Advice? Suggestions? Recommendations?
posted by dobbs at 12:21 PM PST - 8 comments

When to talk to boss about needing more?

I have a great job for many reasons but no growth in responsibilities. I want to tell my boss that I need more but worry that puts a target on my back. [more inside]
posted by cgs at 12:19 PM PST - 9 comments

Uncommon Christmas gift for nieces and nephews (ages 8-12)

My nieces and nephews (5 in total) are wonderful kids. Two are too cool for school, and the other three are curious, well-mannered, and thankful for any gift that comes their way. I'm letting go of the fact that the other two might never love the gifts from their aunt, but there have been hits in the past: Swiss army knife, small red metal toolbox with lock (great to store treasures/have some privacy). I'd like to get them all the same gift, as experience-based gifts are for their birthday. Something useful to them now and meaningful to them later in life.
posted by nathaole at 11:13 AM PST - 14 comments

Where did I stand for the Times Square NYE ball drop?

I'm trying to figure out exactly where I stood for the Millennium/2000 New Year's Eve ball drop in Times Square, but am having some trouble. Help? [more inside]
posted by rachaelfaith at 10:17 AM PST - 3 comments

Give me your glow ups

Work has been super stressful (forever), and I'm slowly getting over a really long and stupid sinus infection, and as a result, I kind of look and feel like something they dragged out of the Chicago River. What are your favorite (relatively) quick-result ways to perk your whole deal up? Looks and spirits alike. [more inside]
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 9:52 AM PST - 29 comments

Medium.com-are writers really making money there?

I finally paid for a subscription to Medium.com, and am now being bombarded with articles about how to make money there. These posts make it sound like a number of authors are making fairly big bucks through the platform's system of dividing up membership fees according to the amount of engagement (claps, highlights, etc.) a particular article gets. Is this for real, or is it a waste of time at best (or some kind of scam at worst)?
posted by rpfields at 9:12 AM PST - 6 comments

Supplemental Shakespeare reading for Slings and Arrows rewatch?

I'm thinking of rewatching Slings and Arrows, and I'd like to read a little something about each of the five Shakespeare plays in the series. What should I read? [more inside]
posted by kristi at 8:49 AM PST - 8 comments

Modcloth giftcard equivalent for UK-based teen

My niece is turning 16, and I wanted to give her a giftcard to Modcloth. But their gift cards are not valid for non-US customers. What is a similar kind of site, that is accessible from the UK, that I can gift her instead? [more inside]
posted by EllaEm at 8:23 AM PST - 14 comments

styrofoam plant

When I was a kid, we would chew on a certain plant. It was either a grass or a forb. The stalks were maybe 1 or 2 feet high. The interior of the stalk was like styrofoam and we would chew on this. This was in the rural midwestern US. Any guess as to the genus/species of this plant?
posted by falsedmitri at 7:56 AM PST - 9 comments

Is a gas line partially outside the house okay to feed a fireplace?

We are thinking of converting our wood burning fireplace to gas. Our house is 100+ years old and utilities are oddly configured, so the contractors have suggested piping outside and then along the house and back in (a total exposed run of 15 feet or so). They say it's normal and the internet seems to agree. Gas-fireplace-havers or contractors of Metafilter: do you have or install outside gas lines? Do you have any issues with it? I don't have to do this project so I want to be sure it's an appropriate choice.
posted by AgentRocket at 7:46 AM PST - 17 comments

Music that’s “a little bit metal”

On the most recent episode of John Roderick and Ken Jennings’ podcast Omnibus, John referenced the Beatles as being “a little bit metal.” He was using the term metal to describe an ethos rather than the actual sound of metal music. What other bands would you describe as a little bit metal? [more inside]
posted by tatiana wishbone at 6:48 AM PST - 19 comments

Where can I find Dove aerosol antiperspirant near Enfield, NS?

My best friend had to sacrifice her beloved Dove dry spray at YYZ security yesterday. (She’s somehow never had a problem at US or UK airports, but this is her first visit to Canada.) We are now at a hotel near YHZ, with plans to drive up to Moncton later today. She’s showering now, and by her own admission the B.O. clock will start as soon as she gets out of the shower. Please assume no other deodorant will do. [more inside]
posted by armeowda at 6:13 AM PST - 5 comments

How do I battle the capitalist mindset?

I am in my mid-thirties and feel the constant pressure to be more, do more, strive further, be better and big better. Capitalism and perfectionism all in one! What will remind me that my lot in life is more than fine? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 4:52 AM PST - 43 comments

Hey brain, lying awake every night isn't helping

How can I compartmentalize work stress, so that I'm not consumed with anxiety about work even when I'm not there? [more inside]
posted by escape from the potato planet at 4:14 AM PST - 25 comments

Neat indie things to buy from the US?

I occasionally buy things from the US and use a forwarding service to avoid extortionate international shipping. The service I use consolidates packages, so there's basically no extra cost to add small items that I wouldn't buy otherwise. What else can I buy in the US that I can't get in Europe? [more inside]
posted by I claim sanctuary at 1:03 AM PST - 8 comments

October 21

Need counterclaim advice

My landlord is suing me for rent and possession on my apartment but filed the claim only one week after my rent was late. [more inside]
posted by The_imp_inimpossible at 8:55 PM PST - 10 comments

Do you have a favorite pen for writing in arabic script?

I love fine writing instruments -- especially fountain pens -- and I also happen to be casually studying the Persian language a.k.a. Farsi. The fountain pen I like to use for Latin alphabet and script doesn't work well for the Arabic script; it seems the nib's too thin. (It's a Monteverde Fine nib.) Using a fudepen actually works better, but I don't imagine that is a normal solution. [more inside]
posted by bertran at 8:26 PM PST - 13 comments

Name of antiques music box store in NYC that is now closed?

I'm going crazy trying to think of what the store was in Manhattan, New York City, that sold antique music boxes. [more inside]
posted by DMelanogaster at 7:36 PM PST - 3 comments

What does "both sides of the glass" mean and where does it come from?

What does "both sides of the glass" mean? I mean, apart from the obvious, when you're cleaning a window. It seems (based on an unpublished academic work I'm reading/editing) to have a metaphorical sense (in a particular field), but I'm curious as to the origin, and to the genre/topic that it is most likely relevant to. I have googled indeed, with quotes and using words like definition, etymology, meaning. If it has a clear and common meaning in YOUR field (of interest, work, family), please share both meaning and field. Thanks heaps.
posted by b33j at 6:08 PM PST - 12 comments

What's a good short book/resource on the making of the atomic bomb?

A good friend of mine is seeing the play "Copenhagen" (Michael Frayn) next year which centres around the meeting of Niels Bohr and Werner Heisenberg in the middle of WWII. He wanted to know more of the background. He tried reading Richard Rhodes' The Making of the Atomic Bomb, but it goes into too much detail for his needs. Is there something better that you would recommend?
posted by storybored at 4:35 PM PST - 13 comments

How to search for online college teaching opportunities?

I have an M.S. in Geography (Physical Geography), and solid teaching experience. I'm interested in teaching courses online, yet I can't find any way to search in an aggregate way. Sites like HigherEdJobs are very low on online teaching gigs. General job search sites like Indeed seem lowish on college-level teaching gigs in general (and thus quite low when you narrow it down to a niche thing like online teaching). Yet if I go directly to college websites and look at the "Careers" sections, these jobs are definitely out there. Is there any way to do this search in bulk, or do I really have to separately apply to dozens or hundreds of colleges and universities separately until I run out of energy? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 4:18 PM PST - 5 comments

🛑 Unique Road Signs From Your Neck of the Woods 🚸

Today I noticed a Turtle Crossing sign in my town. What are some other unique road signs specific to your region? These can include any animal crossing signs or other unique road signs that are less universal and more regional/unusual. [Looking for real signage, not fictitious signs or joke signs from memes or gift shops.]
posted by Fizz at 3:42 PM PST - 109 comments

Wife's doctor denied a second opinion, baby was lost one week later

My wife has a history of first trimester miscarriages so we were both shocked and relieved when she made it to her second trimester. Around 17 weeks my wife started having heart palpitations and made an appointment with her doctor to discuss the symptoms and her family's history of cardiomyopathy. She had a clean EKG but the doctor said she needed to get an ECG and a heart monitor as soon as possible. She called cardiology to schedule the appointment and they said that in their opinion it was not urgent and could wait to a later time. [more inside]
posted by ascetic at 3:36 PM PST - 13 comments

Any fun kid activities in Ventura, CA?

We're road-tripping from NorCal to Ventura for a family event next month. Anything fun to do with a 4 year old in Ventura proper? [more inside]
posted by vunder at 3:08 PM PST - 3 comments

How to get health insurance for a month?

After leaving my last job, I'm going to have a gap in health insurance coverage of approximately one month. I live in Washington, so should I just enroll in Apple Health (aka Medicaid) and then almost immediately cancel, or buy some sort of inexpensive gap coverage? [more inside]
posted by Cogito at 2:34 PM PST - 3 comments

Nice looking coffee table dish for mixed snacks?

We nosh while watching TV, and the (large) coffee table is usually full of plastic containers and a few bags. (Think watermelon seeds, and their unsightly shells, dried apricots, nuts, etc.) I'd like to find an attractive sectioned snack tray, possibly with lids for each section, but not having much luck. [more inside]
posted by 2soxy4mypuppet at 2:04 PM PST - 8 comments

Told not to ask for a raise before bonus - what to do?

After delaying my annual review, I was told to not ask for a raise right now because the owners would almost certainly take it out of my end year bonus and to ask in the new year. This feels... awful. [more inside]
posted by OnTheLastCastle at 1:56 PM PST - 13 comments

The truth, the whole truth. OK, I’ll take a half truth too.

Interviewing for a position but I’m not sure if yellow flags were thrown in the first interview. Nerves and time prevented me from asking me more questions about work life balance and workplace culture. However, the interviewer said “Feel free to contact me if you have more questions about the position!” How should I politely ask about this and should I do it before the second round interview? [more inside]
posted by buttonedup at 1:16 PM PST - 14 comments

How big a deal is installing a radon mitigation system?

Have you installed a radon mitigation system? Did it work/how much was it? [more inside]
posted by pipti at 1:10 PM PST - 10 comments

Things to see/do in London, Ontario?

My husband and I will be in London, Ontario, for a few days. MeFites in the know: what sights/experiences should we definitely not miss while we're there?
posted by ClaireBear at 12:57 PM PST - 15 comments

Early November in Cape Cod, or Elsewhere?

We're traveling to Boston for a conference at the end of October, and have tacked on 4 days afterwards to stay somewhere in the area for a brief vacation, as neither of us have spent a lot of time in the New England area. Lured by the possibility of going to the Gorey House, we were thinking of going to the Cape Cod area for that time. Researching the area, though, it appears that a lot of Cape Cod will be shut down. Would we be better off heading elsewhere--and if so, where? [more inside]
posted by carrienation at 12:33 PM PST - 15 comments

Should we move to Rochester, MN?

What's it like to live in Rochester, MN as an introverted, left-wing, literary/artsy person who loves to fence, cook, and talk about philosophy? [more inside]
posted by emilyanemone at 12:26 PM PST - 8 comments

What makes bacon curl?

What are the factors that will cause American-style bacon to curl as it's cooking? [more inside]
posted by nickmark at 12:16 PM PST - 11 comments

Looking for resources on political marketing, communication and strategy

Help me BASH the FASH! 2020 is an election year in Brazil and I want to get involved in grassroots campaigning. Got a degree in advertising but want to learn more about political marketing, communication, strategy, speechwriting, media training etc. My idea is to help set up and run a campaign for a local municipal council candidate. Recent PSOL member (roughly equivalent to the DSA), so a leftist/socialist bent is welcome but not indispensable. Some stuff I've already found useful after the jump: [more inside]
posted by Tom-B at 12:11 PM PST - 3 comments

No fairy godmother jokes please (unless it's a REALLY funny one)

After my godmother passed away a few years ago, her daughter found this bone or ivory wand-like object in her house. What is it? (She was active in the Lutheran church, so it may be a religious object.) [more inside]
posted by showbiz_liz at 11:38 AM PST - 16 comments

Benvenuto a Italia! Acquiring an Italian passport through grandparents?

My grandparents were Italian and I'm wondering if I could qualify for an Italian passport. My snowflake details for my eligibility are inside. But I also want to know the best way to go about getting an Italian passport, what I should expect in terms of the cost associated with it, and whether it's even worth all the hassle. [more inside]
posted by AppleTurnover at 11:29 AM PST - 2 comments

Can Google Forms dynamically change information displayed based on input

I would like to have Google Forms display a page that computes the output based on responses in earlier sections. [more inside]
posted by cycleback at 11:06 AM PST - 2 comments

Need help solving Factory Balls A31

I've recently become addicted to Factory Balls by Bart Bonte Studios and am stuck on a level. Any help is appreciated! [more inside]
posted by jazon at 10:45 AM PST - 7 comments

Pros and Cons of a moonroof

I'm shopping for a new car (a Toyota RAV4 hybrid), and a dealer has the model and options I want except it also has a moonroof. I've never owned a car with a moonroof, and I have no idea why I would want to pay extra for one. I can imagine downsides -- leaks, in particular. But what are the upsides? If it matters, the car will be parked outside at night and not in a garage.
posted by maurice at 10:02 AM PST - 36 comments

Video Camera for an amateur, guerilla, family movie maker

I’m using my iphone & imovie right now for mini movie-making. Help an overwhelmed, clueless beginner pick a digital camera within a budget of under $500-700. More info inside. [more inside]
posted by Mikey51 at 9:26 AM PST - 7 comments

What are good resources for teaching math to grade school kids at home?

I'd like to supplement my 7 year old kid's math education at home. Ideally without busting out the iPad. Workbooks are fine but the ones we've encountered seem to be better for drilling than teaching. Are there any great books/games/tools that actually help teach math to kids this age?
posted by malhouse at 9:05 AM PST - 12 comments

Restaurants with great cocktails in DC

Hi! Please tell me about your favorite restaurants in Washington, DC that have excellent cocktail programs. Thanks!
posted by DavidNYC at 8:32 AM PST - 15 comments

Hiring a driver for elderly parent

Have you hired a driver for an elderly parent or other relative? See below for details. [more inside]
posted by Bella Donna at 7:49 AM PST - 14 comments

Namethatcritterfilter: Doll edition

At a craft fair yesterday I couldn't resist this gorgeous creature. She needs a name. Let's hear 'em.
posted by essexjan at 7:38 AM PST - 29 comments

Question 2: Electric Hey Wait a Minute

How old is the “Title of Work 2” naming convention for sequels? Like, not “part 2” or “chapter 2,” just... a 2 at the end.
posted by DoctorFedora at 6:02 AM PST - 9 comments

Can I eat this: Frozen Food Thawed For Six Hours Edition

Two big bags frozen sweet corn. Two big bags frozen sweet peas. Two big bags frozen blueberries. Brought them into the condo 1:15 AM, put away other groceries, didn't notice this bag -- I was deep tired, ate a snack and fell under FAST. Found @7 AM, still quite cold but not frozen. Eat what I can for a week while refrigerated, then throw away? Re-freeze? Help?
posted by dancestoblue at 6:00 AM PST - 7 comments

Discourage starlings from nesting without bothering other birds

There used to be a family of mossies (Cape Sparrows, indigenous to where I live here in Cape Town) nesting under the eaves of my house. Recently some European starlings moved in, kicked out the mossies' nest, and started building their own. [more inside]
posted by Zumbador at 5:50 AM PST - 1 comment

Surviving and thriving when VC cash enters the market

What are some examples of companies who have carved out a niche - or even flourished - against competition which has been able to focus on growth without having to worry about margin? [more inside]
posted by Busy Old Fool at 5:39 AM PST - 4 comments

How can I go through a storage locker remotely?

Someone in my immediate family passed away in the US. I live in Europe and can’t travel now. I am the only “heir”. This individual has the storage units which are relatively expensive to keep. I have no idea what’s in them, likely furniture and junk, but you never know. Maybe there are some photo albums, jewelry or personal affects that are emotionally or financially valuable. [more inside]
posted by mateuslee at 4:08 AM PST - 10 comments

October 20

List of open part-time academic jobs (adjunct faculty)?

Where exactly are these job ads posted? [more inside]
posted by CancerSucks at 11:55 PM PST - 17 comments

Help me (a dumb dumb) understand the Roman Empire

It’s a massive topic but there has to be some way in for me [more inside]
posted by Senor Cardgage at 11:11 PM PST - 17 comments

Plants which thrive with no natural light

Have you ever successfully kept plants alive with no natural light? [more inside]
posted by fizban at 10:50 PM PST - 17 comments

Do you get what you pay for with day-of wedding coordinators?

We're having a wedding on a small budget. We probably need (at least) a day-of coordinator. One quote has come in at literally half the price of all of the others. Should we trust it? [more inside]
posted by Miss T.Horn at 10:13 PM PST - 11 comments

Need CSS help with WordPress plugin

I'm starting a new site which will curate specific content. I'm going to use Code Canyon's WordPress Automatic Plugin. Something I want to do requires more CSS knowledge than I have. [more inside]
posted by bryon at 9:54 PM PST - 4 comments

Help me understand how archaeologists estimate dates of finds

I've been doing research for my historical novel and I am confounded by the way estimated dates are presented. Please help pin down when something happened! [more inside]
posted by Beethoven's Sith at 8:58 PM PST - 4 comments

Yeah, I'm that famous character....Dog-Photo-Movie-Woman.

Usually I half-ass it for Halloween (no kids trick or treat, it's a weeknight, I just chill). But - this year, I am volunteering at my neighborhood's big Dog Costume Contest on the Saturday before. And it hit me that...I probably should up my costume game for while I'm there. Yikes. And because I have some very specific requirements because of the event, i'm stumped. DOUBLE yikes. I have a backup idea, but would like to do better if possible. My needs are inside. [more inside]
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 6:01 PM PST - 17 comments

Mailing stuff from USA to Australia without breaking the bank

What are some cost-effective ways to ship about 80lb/36kg of miscellaneous items from USA to Australia? I don't need them immediately, budget's the larger factor. [more inside]
posted by divabat at 5:31 PM PST - 2 comments

how do I have a cozy evening AND a dog?

Especially as the weather gets colder here, I really want to settle down and get cozy in the evening after work - but I can't really feel relaxed until my dog gets his 10pm walk, so I put off having a bath or popcorn or watching a video until after 10, which isn't great for my schedule. How do you relax and get comfy knowing you'll have to get dressed again and go out in the cold before bed?
posted by moonmilk at 5:12 PM PST - 20 comments

Identify These Pruning Shears

My partner found these pruning shears at the MIT SwapFest and bought them because they were inexpensive for the quality. We're curious about when and where they might have been manufactured, but we can't read the markings. I suspect these are Chinese rather than Japanese, but I can't be entirely sure. Any info someone could get from the design of the shears of the maker's mark would be welcome!
posted by tobascodagama at 4:49 PM PST - 4 comments

How would you determine if a country was behind a harassment campaign?

Similar to the analysis that was done during and after 2016 (which few believed at the time), how would you determine if a state-level actor was behind a coordinated online campaign to divide or destroy a given community? How would you determine their involvement in specific conflagrations and harassment campaigns? Basically...how do you determine if it’s Russian bots? (Or whoever) I know journalists have done this before (Adrian Chen?), but I don’t know if there are more amateur-friendly tools available today.
posted by schadenfrau at 4:40 PM PST - 5 comments

Mental Load, for 2

We have a toddler. Already, the mental load is falling more on one parent than the other because so many incoming emails arrive in only one parent's inbox. We use Gmail. How best to manage? [more inside]
posted by nouvelle-personne at 3:18 PM PST - 14 comments

Explain US criminal justice to a Russian immigrant

Help me find online resources to get my Russian immigrant mother acquainted with basic concepts and restrictions in American criminal justice as she tries to assist a family member in jail. Not necessarily in Russian (though it would be nice), not necessarily comparing to analogous policies in Russia (though it would be nice), but necessarily written simply and starting from the very beginning. [more inside]
posted by karo at 1:01 PM PST - 6 comments

Micromanaged, act 2: Ready, set, action.

This is a follow up to my previous question about a micromanaging contractor I'm working with closely; this time, I'm meeting with my boss to discuss the situation and see what can be done. Advice needed. [more inside]
posted by thoughtful_analyst at 11:33 AM PST - 9 comments

How do I work without letting my anger get in the way?

Sooo on Friday I posted that my hours at work were reduced, which left me feeling gutted. For the past two days I've felt nothing but completely angry, which on one hand has given my career search a BIG kick in the ass (found 3 postings to apply to). However, on the other hand I just feel so deflated. I am dreading going into work on Monday and receiving pity from my coworkers. I'm just so angry at this entire situation. How do I go in to work tomorrow and just... work? [more inside]
posted by VirginiaPlain at 9:36 AM PST - 20 comments

YA-SF recs

Please recommend YA Science Fiction novels, comics and/or graphic novels . LGBTQ+ themes are welcome, though not mandatory. [more inside]
posted by signal at 9:12 AM PST - 14 comments

Drying newspaper in oven

I came home and said “it smells like fresh paint in here.” A few moments later I asked my husband why the oven was on. It turns out he was drying out the soaked newspaper at 200 degrees F. I’m not sure for how long. Should I be concerned for our air quality that I smelled paint fumes? Do we need to clean the over?
posted by CMcG at 8:40 AM PST - 3 comments

Mattress woes

Help me figure out a mattress that won't aggravate my back! Ok, we had a Tempur-Pedic that I HATED. It always felt hard to me. Then Casper. When I would get into bed and lay down my back would hurt. Ditto upon waking. We finally sprang for a Purple #4. [more inside]
posted by bookworm4125 at 8:00 AM PST - 14 comments

What's the cheapest country to buy a new iPhone in?

I've got some time on my upcoming holiday break and I've got some international flights so I'm happy to take a layover to hit an Apple store in a country if it'll save me a couple of bucks. But which one? Currency? Taxes? Etc? Where's the best country to buy an iPhone in December?
posted by rileyray3000 at 6:38 AM PST - 12 comments

Dealing with a toxic parent

So I was in a pretty good mood, and I had my regular Skype date with my parents. Got online and the first thing Mum says to me is “oh my gosh what is that on your nose? Is it a pimple? It’s very red?” I tell her it is a skin cancer which I recently had treated. She launches into a lecture about wearing sunscreen and asks what the doctor made of our family history. [more inside]
posted by EatMyHat at 3:02 AM PST - 35 comments

Big house for a little person?

My marriage is ending. The house is mine if I want it. Do I? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:55 AM PST - 19 comments

October 19

Where to spend a whole day in Chicago with two young kids?

I have one day to entertain two kids ages 3 and 7 anywhere in Chicago. I'd like to visit a neighborhood rather than the center of the city where we've spent most of the time so far. [more inside]
posted by Shusha at 7:25 PM PST - 13 comments

Little Treats

I'm wondering if there is any kind of directory for Portland, Oregon that lists places where people can go for desserts, music, little revues or performances and things like that. I;m sure these things are spread out all over town. Stuff that aren't the full commitment of dinner or the theater but are still a good time and listed in one place.
posted by CollectiveMind at 7:21 PM PST - 3 comments

my new rescue pup is making me super anxious - should i give her up?

i've wanted a dog all my life, though long and hard about all the responsibilities of the decision; a week ago, my boyfriend and i adopted this three year old coonhound/blue heeler mix from a rescue/foster. the foster said she was a super sweet, well behaved dog with excellent house manners, the rescue said she was the right energy and level and temperament for two novice owners. now i'm discovering that she has serious behavior issues (off the charts prey drive, obsessive itching/licking when she's anxious, which is often, separation anxiety, and also, can get mouthy when she's overexcited/playful or getting lots of pets). she needs a lot of mental and physician stimulation. i work from home and i'm trying my best, doing a ton of training, but i'm falling behind on my actual work, super stressed, spending a ton of time on her, and feeling like this might have been a mistake. i don't know what to do - [more inside]
posted by lightgray at 4:58 PM PST - 54 comments

I need the "How to start a petition" basics from start to finish

I want to start a petition in my state regarding amending some of the landlord tenant statutes that are over 100 years old. [more inside]
posted by The_imp_inimpossible at 3:33 PM PST - 11 comments

Can I drive home if I put more coolant in?

I have a 2000 Camry in generally good shape. While I was driving just now the check engine light came on. When I pulled over, I popped the hood & saw there was no coolant in the coolant reservoir & the radiator looks crusty on top. I live about 4 miles away; is it ok to drive home on surface streets if I let the car cool down & add more coolant? How long should I let it cool, if so?
posted by needs more cowbell at 12:21 PM PST - 18 comments

Why was my sardine green?

I just opened a tin of sardines, took a few bites, and then noticed that the part I had eaten was dark green and odd looking. Help me figure out what it was and if I'm going to be sick. :( [more inside]
posted by phatkitten at 12:12 PM PST - 6 comments

Why is my local bakery's good so much better than the supermarket?

I just bought a sticky bun from my local bakery. To put it mildly it is effing delicious - light, moist and sweet but not too sweet. It made me wonder: What is the main reason why the packaged baked goods at the supermarket are so yucky? Of course they aren't as fresh, but is there also a question of ingredients? I couldn't think of anything that a bakery does that couldn't be automated on some factory line. But clearly there's a missing element! What is it?
posted by storybored at 10:26 AM PST - 26 comments

What professional do I need to fix a jetted bathtub?

This seems like a silly question to me, but I really don’t know. My house has one of those spa bathtubs with jets. It doesn’t work. Who do I ask to come figure out what the problem is and fix it? [more inside]
posted by centrifugal at 10:02 AM PST - 7 comments

Acquiring ebooks responsibly without adding to Bezos' coffers.

This week's New Yorker has a scathing profile of Jeff Bezos, boss of Amazon. After reading it, I'm determined to close up my account, once it's paid up. I need my money more than he does. But here's the thing..... [more inside]
posted by BostonTerrier at 9:27 AM PST - 20 comments

Recipe tips for making a modified ranch-like dressing

I've been making my own vegan ranch dressing, and it's wonderful. But after eating multiple batches of it, I'm getting a bit tired of it – and I'm looking for something that tastes a little different. [more inside]
posted by JD Sockinger at 7:48 AM PST - 11 comments

How are multi-plane trips priced? And can I only use the 2nd flight?

In November, I'm flying to Vanuatu from Toronto, which is too far for direct. Pricing out flights, all seem to switch at LAX. It is cheaper for me to fly from Toronto to Vanuatu, switching in LA, than it is to fly directly from LA to Vanuatu on the exact same flight. How does this make sense from a business perspective? Also, if I get to LA on my own a few days early, am I able to show up at LAX take the second flight to Vanuatu after skipping the first out of Toronto? [more inside]
posted by dobbs at 7:17 AM PST - 10 comments

A food safety question: French food in England made by an American editi

I have a very minimal recipe for Cassoulet that requires letting pork "rest" for 6 hours after slow cooking it for 2 hours. Do I just leave it on the stove?! That seems insane. [more inside]
posted by pazazygeek at 7:13 AM PST - 11 comments

Are vertebrates upside-down insects?

What's the current consensus on the dorsoventral axis inversion hypothesis? I can see in preview that it is a long-debated idea in biology. Is it still debated, or has evidence from genetics and microbiology decided it conclusively one way or the other?
posted by clawsoon at 6:10 AM PST - 2 comments

Tipping your host in the UK?

if you’re staying at an Airbnb in the UK (with some cleaning services included), how much should we tip our hosts? [more inside]
posted by gtrwolf at 4:09 AM PST - 8 comments

Leather jacket in Italy

At what store would or did you buy a ladies leather jacket in Milan or Florence, Italy, for under $500USD? How has the jacket held up if you did buy one? [more inside]
posted by bilabial at 2:49 AM PST - 3 comments

What are the odds that this was a mouse poo?

I found a small thing in my bed that looked like a mouse poop (according to my cursory internet research). Assuming I don’t find any others like it, what are the odds that this was actually a poo? [more inside]
posted by delight at 12:41 AM PST - 10 comments

October 18

There’s a blue light

I’m way jealous of android phone blue light cancelling apps. How dim can I make my screen on an iPhone? [more inside]
posted by Champagne Supernova at 8:10 PM PST - 6 comments

✧・゚:* Nothing in life matters! :D 👍👍✧・゚:*

Tumblr introduced me to this 80s remix of Linkin Park's Numb and it is EXACTLY my aesthetic for this point in my life. Give me more peppy remixes of rock/emo/sad/angry music. [more inside]
posted by brook horse at 7:06 PM PST - 13 comments

Staying dry for a season on the slush

I am deploying to Palmer Station in Antarctica, where it rains during the austral summer. I also live in the Pacific Northwest. I don't have a good raincoat. Please help me! [more inside]
posted by cnidaria at 6:15 PM PST - 15 comments

In search of Beautiful Instrumental Music to Live By

Have you ever heard an instrumental song and thought it would be perfect for a soundtrack over a montage clip of your life? That it just captured a mood of a period of time or helped you sink further into the moment? Either way, more info on the instrumental songs I'm seeking is inside! [more inside]
posted by carlypennylane at 5:24 PM PST - 38 comments

Spider Host

For Halloween this year, I finally have a house that faces the street where I hope to get trick-or-treaters! My house has a bunch of weird metal sculpture art in the front yard, including some big metal spiders on the roof, so I ran with that and spiderwebbed everything. Now I need to figure out what to wear as I hand out candy (and non-candy treats for the kids with allergies). Obviously something spider-themed... Please help! [more inside]
posted by Weeping_angel at 5:21 PM PST - 17 comments

Most expedient way into records management

So, this was me last week. I'm feeling even more lost and stupid because I just got word that my position, while not ideal, is now reduced to part time. I recently got an MLIS and libraries in my province don't appear to be hiring at all. I need to find a better job ASAP, so it seems like records management it is! How do I get there from here? [more inside]
posted by VirginiaPlain at 3:34 PM PST - 12 comments

Los Angeles Nov 2

What to do in LA on the evening of Saturday Nov 2? Buddy is visiting from out of town. There’s a TON of dia de los muertos celebrations but I have no idea what’s Good. [more inside]
posted by St. Peepsburg at 1:15 PM PST - 5 comments

Help me navigate small-group travel in the modern era?

I'll shortly be traveling with a small group -- me, husband, teen kid + 2 older teens. We're coming from different places, meeting in one city, doing five days of activities with various combinations of people joining in or sitting out for some days/activities. I'm the one making the itinerary and arranging tickets, reservations, etc. What's the best way to share this info with the group? [more inside]
posted by BlahLaLa at 1:03 PM PST - 16 comments

Why is this network slowing down my machine?

I'm currently working as a contractor on a cruise ship, working with their audio systems. There is one main "control" network which connects all audio computers, consoles, and some affiliated lighting control systems which is causing major issues with my computer. [more inside]
posted by aloiv2 at 1:01 PM PST - 15 comments

Have Dinner Ingredients; Will Travel

I'm visiting a friend and her family later this month, and I want to make dinner for everyone one night while I'm there. I want to take all the ingredients with me, and will make a 3- to 4-hour public transit trip to get there, so the ingredients must keep unrefrigerated for that length of time. I want something relatively easy and fast to make that won't require any specialized equipment. What are some good dinner ideas/recipes that would be suitable for these particular circumstances?
posted by orange swan at 11:57 AM PST - 25 comments

How do I purchase a print of this National Geographic photo?

I want to buy a print of this photo of rats. Any idea how to do that, and if I should go through National Geographic, Natural History Museum in London, or C. Hamilton James? Thanks!
posted by andoatnp at 11:42 AM PST - 7 comments

Shopping for pull-out couches

1) Do you have a pull-out couch you absolutely love? Please recommend it to me! 2) Are there any stores in NYC you recommend shopping at for pull-out couches? Thanks!
posted by Conrad Cornelius o'Donald o'Dell at 11:26 AM PST - 10 comments

A gift for a friend who recently moved to Berlin?

I'm looking for a gift for a friend of mine who recently moved to Berlin, Germany. What's a good gift for someone who is new to Berlin (coming from the USA)? [more inside]
posted by wikipedia brown boy detective at 10:48 AM PST - 8 comments

Help with melody in The Muffs "I Need a Face"

A snippet of this song reminds me of another melody but I can't identify.... [more inside]
posted by sol at 10:13 AM PST - 7 comments

Should I eat it: open freezer edition

Freezer was ajar all night. What is safe to keep, what is not? Lots and lots of food in it, ranging from fruit to cooked meat. [more inside]
posted by john_snow at 10:08 AM PST - 8 comments

Help with finding article on conspiracies, P&G Satanism panic and MLMs

Some time back I remember reading an article that talked about conspiracy theories and how the people who believe them don't always actually believe them, that instead it's group signalling. I have wanted to show it to people a couple of times since then but didn't save it, please help? [more inside]
posted by imabanana at 9:40 AM PST - 4 comments

Help me find this quote!

It’s about the ocean AND the mountains. [more inside]
posted by sillysally at 9:39 AM PST - 1 comment

Getting Paid as a Freelancer

What can I do to get paid as freelancer in a more timely fashion? [more inside]
posted by ljs30 at 9:33 AM PST - 20 comments

Loghorn Leghorn

Calling mycologists and naturalists. What the heck are those horned things on this log ? [more inside]
posted by Burhanistan at 9:19 AM PST - 8 comments

Eat, Play, Go F*&( Yourself

I'm a 36 year old woman going through a divorce and need some empowering media to help me focus on my recovery. I'm not necessarily looking books about divorce specifically, but seeking novels, non-fic, poetry, memoires, TV, movies, etc. that feature women thriving, struggling, handling their shit without the plot hinging on a romantic partnership. [more inside]
posted by deadcrow at 8:23 AM PST - 28 comments

Raw unsweetened shredded coconut in Chicago

I'm trying to recreate a dessert that a friend used to eat when they lived in Cuba as a child called either dulce de coco or coco rallado, which requires raw unsweetened shredded coconut. I don't relish the idea of buying a coconut and shredding it, so where might I be able to find what I need in Chicago? It needs to be raw (because that's how they made it when they were there)--I can find dried shredded coconut anywhere.
posted by goatdog at 7:31 AM PST - 5 comments

Problems with providing a urine sample

Apparently I'm doing something wrong with providing urine samples, they keep coming back as 'contaminated'. I'm female bodied, so help me figure out what I'm doing wrong? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 7:01 AM PST - 19 comments

Bastards <3 Manics?

The song "1%" by Lars Frederiksen and the Bastards has a chorus that goes "I'm a generation terrorist and when I shoot you know I never miss". Is this most likely a reference to the Manic Street Preachers' album Generation Terrorists, or were the Manics and the Bastards both making a reference to something else?
posted by capricorn at 6:25 AM PST - 1 comment

Text-based guided meditations?

What are some good texts/resources for starting/guiding a meditation when I don't want to listen to audio? [more inside]
posted by rorgy at 6:04 AM PST - 3 comments

October 17

Unopened unrefrigerated veganaise - keep or toss?

I had a jar of veganaise in my refrigerator. PG&E turned my power off for two days. I cleaned out my fridge and freezer after the power came back on, and took the veganaise out of the fridge, thinking I needed to toss it. Realized the jar was still sealed with the plastic over the cap and everything. After leaving it out for a few days, I put it back in the fridge. Toss? Keep? [more inside]
posted by lazuli at 9:22 PM PST - 15 comments

What's Burlington like for a visit? How about to move to?

We (spouse, 8-mo-old beeb, and I) are visiting Burlington, VT for a long weekend, Nov 8-11. We're staying pretty central, I think-- near the waterfront right by the Church Street marketplace. What should we check out for fun while we're there (details below the fold)? More importantly but less immediately, what should we see and do to evaluate it for permanently relocating to next year? [more inside]
posted by supercres at 6:25 PM PST - 19 comments

Nothin' to do but read

What are your favorite looong books? 1200-1500 pages or so? [more inside]
posted by pH Indicating Socks at 5:44 PM PST - 78 comments

are there any future consequences to a gap in US health insurance?

Because of mixups by my employer and myself, I was without health insurance for a month. Nothing bad happened to me during that month, and I didn't make any claims of any kind. Is there any reason to try to close that gap retroactively? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 5:24 PM PST - 4 comments

How to deal with finding out decades later that mom was an alcoholic?

When I was in Jr High, my mom had a liver transplant. At the time, I was told it was a misdiagnosis of a mystery illness. She very nearly died. I am now 40, and have just learned that it was actually cirrhosis from drinking. I had some suspicions but this is still a massive jolt to me, and boy, do I feel dumb for ever thinking it was anything else. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 5:02 PM PST - 19 comments

New pole dance song recs

I pole dance and I've been trying to find songs that inspire me to move when I'm dancing alone (without an audience- which I specify because whether it will go over well for an audience or in a club isn't a consideration here). I've totally played out all of my favorite songs and I'm looking for new recommendations. They should be moody, rhythmic, and usually slow-ish without having that overproduced pop feel that's common to a lot of "sexy" songs. Examples of what I like are inside. [more inside]
posted by deus ex machina at 2:18 PM PST - 44 comments

What's the safest space heater?

Heating a basement rental unit. Don't trust the tenants. Best devices? [more inside]
posted by nouvelle-personne at 1:08 PM PST - 25 comments

"All great achievements require time"

I see this listed everywhere as a Maya Angelou quote, but I can't find the source. Is this actually a quote of hers or is it generic pablum?
posted by selfnoise at 12:56 PM PST - 2 comments

What does "inf. aut." mean?

I've noticed that a number of nurses and nurse educators have the letters "inf. aut." after their names, along with other degrees. What kind of academic credential is indicated by inf. aut. ?
posted by angiep at 12:44 PM PST - 2 comments

Understanding Sexual Identities Better to Find My Place

Can someone help an inexperienced Generation X-er struggling (i) with differentiating biological sex, gender identity, and sexual attraction, and (ii) with where they self-identify on same? I am wondering if someone could explain how gender identity is distinct from sexual attraction; and also what one might find/look for, within themselves, that might suggest they are nonbinary. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 12:26 PM PST - 19 comments

Athletic pubalgia or "sports hernia" for runner

Wondering if anyone's had experience with athletic pubalgia or "sports hernia" causing groin pain, especially runners. What should we know? What treatment did you do and how was the recovery? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 12:24 PM PST - 1 comment

home warranties, are they good, should i get?

we have an older house, older pool pump, older air conditioner. should we look at a home warranty? [more inside]
posted by chasles at 12:08 PM PST - 9 comments

German Fritz Rohrs's woodcut prints

Where to sell Fritz Rohrs's woodcut prints? [more inside]
posted by Mesaverdian at 12:01 PM PST - 2 comments

Should i ask for a signing bonus? Ibalready accepted, is it too late?

Going from temp to permanent hire. Been in the role for3 months and the salary is considerably more than my current hourly rate, should i ask for a signing bonus to make up that difference? [more inside]
posted by djduckie at 11:45 AM PST - 11 comments

Help us survive our first family snowy winter in a mountain home

We have just relocated from a relatively warm place (SF Bay Area) to what will be a long cold snowy winter location (Park City, UT). What are your top tips for surviving snowy winters with kids / things we wouldn't otherwise think to prepare or do as a family? [more inside]
posted by inflatablekiwi at 11:19 AM PST - 48 comments

How do I break tulips?

I have some broken tulip bulbs from last year. I would like to give some new tulip bulbs the breaking virus. Is there a correct way to transmit the virus-- inject the new bulb with broken tulip smoothie? The scholarly stuff I saw talked about aphids transmitting the virus, but I'd like to do it without insect help.
posted by gregr at 11:19 AM PST - 5 comments

A friend wants to know more about an IL reheab facility

A friend is looking into residential treatment programs for another friend in Illinois/Midwest. [more inside]
posted by debgpi at 11:17 AM PST - 2 comments

Portland winter biking HALP!

I’ve just completed my first proper rainy Portland winter bike ride, and it did not go well. Turns out, rainy winter walking prep is not sufficient for biking. Help me stay dry and cozy with a minimum of hassle. [more inside]
posted by duien at 10:43 AM PST - 16 comments

Career implications of taking a managerial position

I have been encouraged to apply for a director role. I am not sure that I want this particular role but I said I would give it some thought. I wonder about the potential pitfalls of taking a director role then wanting to return to front line worker level. Am I correct in thinking that this would be difficult to do? [more inside]
posted by crunchy potato at 10:39 AM PST - 8 comments

Looking for a better term than "virgin" material

Part of my job is associated with increasing the amount of recycled materials used in my company, and we talk about "percent recycled versus percent virgin" material a lot. I would like to find a better term than "virgin" to refer to unused feedstock. Unused is one term, of course, but I would like other ideas. (I have been successful at changing our connector terminology from referring to "male/female" connectors to "plug/receptacle," so I believe this is not an impossible task.)
posted by blurker at 10:36 AM PST - 25 comments

Sheffield / Newcastle upon Tyne: Dating scene for 30s woman?

I've just applied for medical school. If I got in, I'd be there from ages 33-38. I'm also keen to have a partner (probably male) and family at some point (yes, it might involve taking time off medical school). This decision is provoking anxiety for me because... well, my biological timeline feels short. I've put Newcastle as one of my options, but I could switch it to Sheffield. My question is primarily: which of the two is better for what I'm looking to find? and also, somewhat, how should I go about finding it? [more inside]
posted by tangerine_poppies at 10:24 AM PST - 5 comments

What is life like in contemporary Hawaii?

As an American, I have spent time in 49 of our 50 states. Hawaii, due to its distance, has remained out of reach. I want to be able to read an article, flip through a magazine, watch a film or doc, read a book (fiction or nonfiction) or see a blogger/vlogger that covers life on this unique chain of islands. Looking for an array of perspectives from Native Hawaiians, Asians, other Polynesians, mainland Americans in Hawaii, gay/queer life, rural vs. urban life, political relationships to the mainland US, etc. [more inside]
posted by caveatz at 10:15 AM PST - 9 comments

Surgery vs. natural remedies for osteoarthritis

I have osteoarthritis in my left thumb. It’s very painful and limits my use of that hand. I have been getting cortisone shots every 4 months since 2017. My orthopedic hand specialist does not take my new insurance and referred me to someone else. [more inside]
posted by htm at 9:49 AM PST - 14 comments

When your friend makes you feel like you're literally going crazy?

I have a friend who experienced sustained interpersonal trauma over several years in childhood. Ninety-seven percent of the time they are one way and three percent of the time they are another way. There must be books about this? [more inside]
posted by zeek321 at 8:33 AM PST - 18 comments

Best Safety Videos

I have money in the budget to buy some Safety Training videos. Most of them are very not good - outdated (clothing/styles clearly from 30+ years ago, not the info) , corny, dry, unengaging. Do you have any that were memorably good, and that you'd recommend? [more inside]
posted by Sparky Buttons at 6:45 AM PST - 7 comments

What's your favorite VPN/proxy server for getting UK content in the US?

Trying to watch BBC iplayer, C4, and ITV from the US. I've tried various proxy servers in the past, none of which have been entirely satisfactory. Tunnel Bear was very glitchy. NordVPN was sporadically glitchy. FoxyProxy sucked. What has worked for you recently? Is there anything else I should try that is reliable? [more inside]
posted by EllaEm at 6:36 AM PST - 10 comments

Where the Wild Songs Are

Help! My six-year-old has requested that I make him "a playlist of songs where they just go wild." The only example he was able to provide was Candy Gun by Melt-Banana. I think what's he looking for is something that has a little build-up and then a part that allows him to practice his air-guitar skills, but I would love suggestions for anything that falls under your personal interpretation of "songs where they just go wild." Thanks!
posted by lollymccatburglar at 5:47 AM PST - 60 comments

Inspiration for anti-Brexit protest sign

My sign idea was based around Halloween, but since that date could change (again) between now and Saturday: Give me your best anti-Brexit, pro-People's Vote signs/slogans!
posted by Glier's Goetta at 1:53 AM PST - 7 comments

October 16

I loved Derry Girls. So what's next in the Irish TV queue?

I want to keep the Irish TV thing going. Not British TV (though I loved IT Crowd and Gavin and Stacey, etc) but IRISH. What other TV series are out there for me to watch - drama, comedy, other - that's more insight into Irish culture? Or at least features some strong Irish characters and themes? Besides Father Ted I mean. Already feckin did that one.
posted by rileyray3000 at 11:20 PM PST - 25 comments

What’s the best way to blur faces in photos on an iPhone XR?

I regularly want to simply blur faces in photos on my phone, an iPhone XR. I would ideally like this to be as simple as “pull photo up, scribble on face with finger, save.” I am happy to pay for an app up to $10, but do not want to pay for a subscription service or have to do anything not-on-the-phone. [more inside]
posted by charmedimsure at 9:55 PM PST - 7 comments

Handheld barcode scanner target practice

I need to continually train people to use a couple of different handheld barcode scanners in a fast paced but regulatory constrained environment. Are there programs that game-ify handheld barcode scanner proficiency? [more inside]
posted by porpoise at 8:29 PM PST - 3 comments

Dreams on screens

Looking for films that incorporate dreams, dreaming, hallucinations, alternate realities, as a major part of the plot. [more inside]
posted by nantucket at 8:16 PM PST - 36 comments

Floor protectors for skinny chair legs: Metal caps ok? Other options?

I have some nice vintage wood dining chairs with slender legs (3/4" diameter where they meet the floor). The chairs are on a wood floor that I naturally want to protect from the chairs moving and being sat on over the years. I haven't been happy with the options I've found for this for various reasons (see below). Are there other, better options out there? [more inside]
posted by Mechitar at 7:55 PM PST - 13 comments

How do we use these eye drops?

A family member was prescribed tobramycin eye drops for pink eye (currently in one eye) and we're a little confused by the directions. Probably I shouldn't have dismissively said "Eye drops, right?" to the pharmacist when she asked if we needed guidance. It's after hours now so I'm hoping y'all are better at reading than we are. [more inside]
posted by Nonsteroidal Anti-Inflammatory Drug at 7:41 PM PST - 5 comments

Security tag still on after I bought backpack

I went to Sausalito today and bought a really nice backpack made from recycled bottles. I love it! Problem. It was late and I was rushing to the ferry and they didn’t take the security tag off! tag in question. I really don’t want to go back to Sausalito tomorrow as I’m back to work on Friday- what are my options to get this tag off without hurting myself/dying myself? [more inside]
posted by Homo neanderthalensis at 7:09 PM PST - 19 comments

What's a good birthday present for my soon-to-be six year-old niece?

She's learning to read, she likes Minnie Mouse and Wonder Woman, unicorns and bunnies, and loves music and dancing. She's great.
posted by boghead at 7:07 PM PST - 10 comments

T-Shirts for Greta Thunberg climate rally on Friday

Greta Thunberg is coming to my city Friday and there will be a climate change rally!!!!! Help me come up with a t-shirt for my daughter and I please? I'm a busy mom, haven't been reading enough lately, don't know what the slogans are....Bonus for Canadian content. [more inside]
posted by kitcat at 3:35 PM PST - 9 comments

Disc tray opening randomly

I've had my system for a while, and recently the disc tray has been opening and closing randomly. This has never happened before, it just started in the last month or so. It doesn't seem to be associated with any particular program. I ran Spybot and Malwarebytes, no problems found. It's an HP with Windows 7 Home.
posted by Marky at 3:17 PM PST - 5 comments

What's the best way to usea backup SIM card on a hotspot with GoogleFi?

My wife's business has an issue with the [business class, Comcast] internet dropping, sometimes weekly, sometimes monthly. This is a large inconvenience as it impacts video conferencing (1 on 1), VOIP phones, SaaS solutions, and internet. I think adding a free GoogleFi SIM to my account and buying a hotspot device would help with the remainder of the items and would hardly impact my Flexible for 1 plan. Help me with my logic and hardware decision because SIMs and hotspots confuse me. [more inside]
posted by RolandOfEld at 12:52 PM PST - 7 comments

Finding Canada Post parcel lost in the US

Trying to find a package shipped by Canada Post to my old address in the US, and I’ve hit a dead end on what to do next. Help! [more inside]
posted by skycrashesdown at 12:38 PM PST - 4 comments

What's a good upright cordless?

Do you have an upright cordless vacuum you love? Do tell! [more inside]
posted by madonna of the unloved at 12:26 PM PST - 17 comments

Should I apply for my current boss's job when they leave?

Are there any downsides to applying? [more inside]
posted by winterportage at 12:02 PM PST - 15 comments

How to do reparations on an individual scale?

We inherited $250,000 a couple years ago. After sitting on it for a couple years, we have decided we would like to give it to international reparations. Please help us figure out how. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 11:08 AM PST - 13 comments

Possible--or even desirable--to do multiple PhDs?

I’m drawn to the idea of pursuing graduate education at the doctoral level in both of the two disciplines in which I have a record of success--literature and philosophy. I’m primarily wondering if this is possible. [more inside]
posted by scriptible at 10:34 AM PST - 35 comments

Looking for early 20th century book of 4 Shakespeare plays

I'm looking for an edition of 4 Shakespeare plays (Hamlet, King Lear, Othello, and Romeo & Juliet). This was likely published in the 1910s, but no later than 1916. Less likely, it could also have been published earlier (probably 1880s at the very earliest). The book was in English and it was likely published in England. Does anyone know how I can locate this book?
posted by Put the kettle on at 10:25 AM PST - 6 comments

After Effects motion paths

I'm trying to make an object follow a motion path. Doing it exactly as in tutorial (draw path, copy Path, paste onto Objects Position parameters). But it doesn't work - the object follows the path but it's offset, so it starts offscreen and ends halfway across. The Path looks like it's in the right place so I can't just shift it. How do I fix? Everyone else makes it look so straightforward :(
posted by KateViolet at 9:41 AM PST - 7 comments

Replace hasp locks with what?

Instead of hasp locks, how should we lock our French doors instead? [more inside]
posted by emelenjr at 9:32 AM PST - 3 comments

NYC's Chinatown for 3 hours - whatcha got?

I've got 3-4 hours to explore NYC before an afternoon commitment so I've decided to explore Chinatown. I have little to no experience here so I'm looking for a few great places to find quirky homegoods, textiles and gifts. I'm probably going to grab an early lunch too so any food recommendations would be helpful.
posted by IndigoOnTheGo at 8:46 AM PST - 13 comments

What are the laws in NYC for greenroofs? Examples of other US cities?

Does NYC have any mandatory laws? Are there other US cities that have laws/requirements for greeroofs on new constructed buildings?
posted by ebesan at 7:41 AM PST - 5 comments

Where should we go for a long weekend in northern California?

My wife and I would like to take a long weekend after a business trip to San Francisco in January. We'll be going Thursday to Monday. We like natural beauty, redwood groves, spas, good food and drinks, and nice hotels. We're willing to splurge. Where should we go?
posted by david1230 at 7:35 AM PST - 14 comments

What's your favorite off the beaten track place in Spain?

Traveling to Spain in mid/late April 2020 for ~ten days. Plan is to fly into Barcelona and out of Madrid as it's surprisingly cheaper than the reverse and less dead time than circling back. Assume we're familiar with and planning on the main sights. What else shouldn't we miss? [more inside]
posted by TravellingCari at 7:32 AM PST - 18 comments

Typing as bottleneck. Will dictation software help? Will anything else?

Like every person in the world, a huge amount of my job and life consists of typing. Mostly emails, but also occasional reports, web copy, whatever. And like every person in the world: I have too much to do, and not enough time to do it in. I often feel the greatest bottleneck to my daily productivity is just the speed with which my fingers can type (around maybe 50 wpm). I’m curious how other folks have dealt with this: Learning to type faster? Using text expanders? Dictation software? Something else? [more inside]
posted by ManInSuit at 6:58 AM PST - 37 comments

Crossing the Irish border in November

I may not have a passport in November. I'll need to cross the border from Northern Ireland to the Republic of Ireland then, before returning to Northern Ireland. In the event of a no-deal Brexit, is there any chance I'll have a problem crossing the border? There's a lot of talk about customs checks and regulatory checks for goods, but, happily for me, I don't see any discussion of the possibility of passport controls.
posted by EtTuHealy at 6:28 AM PST - 5 comments

Can I turn on the love for my cat?

We have had my cat, Yancy, for about 3.5 years, becoming her fourth family in as many years. We thought we could fix this cat. We can not fix this cat. A big move is coming and I need to decide how to serve us all the best. [more inside]
posted by stormygrey at 5:11 AM PST - 31 comments

Can you give me recommendation for free 11+ / 11plus tutoring resources?

Could anyone let me know where I might be able to find any useful (and hopefully free) schemes of learning / tutor study plans, lesson resources etc. for 11+ grammar school exams in England? Or recommend any of the paid sites / resources. [more inside]
posted by mairuzu at 1:56 AM PST - 1 comment

October 15

Book about artists trading art with each other

I read the article "Cash, Card or Painting? How, and Why, Artists Exchange Work" and to my surprise found the topic very interesting. Unfortunately it doesn't appear that this article is a chapter from a forthcoming book, but I'm wondering if anyone has any book recommendations on the topic that are written in a similar anecdote driven style?
posted by Corduroy at 11:56 PM PST - 2 comments

SF short story - radio waves

Yet another science fiction short story request! [more inside]
posted by Chrysostom at 9:53 PM PST - 6 comments

Unmarried national leaders

Canada has spent over 30 of its 150 years being run by an unmarried prime minister, between W.L. Mackenzie King, R.B. Bennett, Mackenzie Bowell, Pierre Trudeau, and Kim Campbell. Can any other democracy match that well-nigh Elizabethan record?
posted by clawsoon at 7:51 PM PST - 10 comments

Tonight's NCIS - what is going on?

Tonight Mrs. L & I were watching NCIS on NBC (we both like watching it every Tuesday). However we have questions (maybe some spoilers): 1. Why are "the team" wearing red overalls? 2. Most of the action takes place in a makeshift encampment in a "Terminal" (sign on wall in background). This Looks like a bus terminal or maybe a hospital outpatient waiting area. What is going on and is this today in 2019 or some future sci fi dystopia? Dear NCIS viewers, please explain this to us.
posted by lungtaworld at 7:02 PM PST - 5 comments

The art of letting go

How can I get better at letting things go? Misunderstandings, tense incidents, harsh words, things left unsaid. I have a rather compulsive need to talk an issue to death, which is great when you're talking to someone that shares this appreciation of the postmortem, and is a great way to fuel insight and growth. But not everyone does appreciate it, and it's not always an appropriate use of my time - but I can't seem to stop. [more inside]
posted by crunchy potato at 6:03 PM PST - 14 comments

What’s the kindest thing to do?

My most recent ex texted me on Saturday, after about two months of no-contact. I haven’t replied. I don’t want to see him again, but I also truly wish him well in his life. Is it better to keep ignoring, or send a brief reply? [more inside]
posted by umwhat at 4:48 PM PST - 36 comments

How do I not get read as aggressive when I'm trying to be assertive?

I don't have a lot of practice being assertive, partly because when I try to be clear, precise, and direct, the people I'm talking to treat me as though I'm being aggressive. I hate that! When this happens with someone doing a job I stop dealing with the people after this happens and ask my long-suffering person to deal with it, which is annoying to him. When this happens in my personal life, I back down and suck up feelings and my needs. [more inside]
posted by platitudipus at 4:17 PM PST - 30 comments

Finding a Mandarin class that does not involve writing

Deets: I took a year of Mandarin in college so I have a basis, but not much, to go on. I am specifically looking for a class, not an app, because I think human interaction is really important for language learning. My brain is really not wired for the writing plus it's not my primary interest. Is a class that just teaches you the spoken part a thing that exists? I am in the the (east) bay area so there is certainly a Chinese population, which might work in my favor. I do not know if, as in NYC, however, the population here primarily speaks a language other than Mandarin.
posted by less of course at 3:58 PM PST - 5 comments

What kind of birthday cake would you like?

I volunteered to make the cake for a friend's birthday. I seldom make cakes and am looking for inspiration. What types of cake and icing would you want? I'm a fair baker, prefer not to get terribly exotic ingredients, but otherwise, anything goes.
posted by theora55 at 3:34 PM PST - 43 comments

What types of dog is this

I'm trying to figure out what breed (if any) my puppy is closest to. Her mother is a street dog (picture included) and her father is unknown. [more inside]
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 3:15 PM PST - 13 comments

Help me remember a word association game

I rememeber playing a web-based game circa 2009-2010. It started out with a word like "farm" and you had to guess words related to the word farm. Words like "ox," "rooster," "tractor" unlocked new boxes, and you could guess more words related to those. This network expanded further and further out into theme-based squares in a larger board: so there was a "magician" box, a "Britain" box, etc. Does this ring a bell for anybody? My googling is turning up nothing.
posted by soonertbone at 12:18 PM PST - 7 comments

No sound from any apps on Android phone

Out of the blue, none of the apps on my phone can make any sound. However, the speakers work fine because they make noises when I tap the sound on/off toggle. WTF? [more inside]
posted by dobbs at 11:42 AM PST - 7 comments

Top surgery vs breast reduction

My nonbinary partner has always wanted top surgery but due to cost and Medicaid restrictions didn't think it was a viable option. They began pursuing breast reduction for pain/nausea reasons beyond the dysphoria. Breast reduction just got approved by their insurance, but Medicaid restrictions on gender-affirming surgery were also just lifted in their state and now they're not sure how to proceed. Snowflakes inside. [more inside]
posted by undisclosed at 11:41 AM PST - 21 comments

What's the best voters' registration support organization to donate to?

I want to set up a monthly donation to help register voters in the U.S. in preparation for the 2020 election. My motivation is to help the Democratic candidate win but I'm open to non-partisan organizations as well. I want to find an organization that is: 1) focusing efforts on at least one battleground state, 2) likely to be effective in their efforts and 3) bonus points for focusing on people of color, low-income voters, and strategies to combat GOP voter suppression nastiness. What are some great options for this?
posted by overglow at 11:19 AM PST - 5 comments

So much dust!

How do you clean the dust on your floors and furniture? [more inside]
posted by ColdIcedT at 10:11 AM PST - 10 comments

Examples of/interviews on less creative big budget films

I'm working with a hs student writing a thesis paper on low budget cult movies. We're looking for interviews/articles about filmmakers talking about how restricted creative freedom (due to studio constraints) made their film worse or unsuccessful. Bonus if the examples are comedies! Double bonus if they are from the 90's-00's! [more inside]
posted by wellifyouinsist at 10:02 AM PST - 11 comments

Leadership porn, a subset of competence porn

Some books I've read have featured characters who are really good at delegating tasks to the right people, figuring out what makes people tick in such a way as to best encourage/empower them, having honor/integrity as a leader in a way that inspires people to follow them, etc. Being really competent at leading/managing. Turns out I love this and want more! [more inside]
posted by Cozybee at 9:56 AM PST - 22 comments

Gift suggestions for someone trying to learn Hebrew?

Courses, books, flash cards, etc. that can help someone learn Hebrew? [more inside]
posted by cycleback at 9:33 AM PST - 4 comments

Articles/narratives about self-harm/cutting

I have a friend (S) with a teenage niece that has started cutting. S is good about being supportive, but this is out of her realm of experience, and looking for ways to increase her understanding I've found some previous AskMe threads with discussions that I'll send her, but I'm hoping that MeFites can recommend specific articles on the topic. I know she'd resonate more with a) personal narratives from any perspective, b) compassionate/non-judgmental, c) non-religious. Thanks for any suggestions
posted by Gorgik at 9:28 AM PST - 4 comments

Cheap running shoes: suggestions? Or a bad idea?

I am in desperate need of new running shoes. In the past, I have usually worn Merrell's, which I have liked a lot. However, I am poor right now, and am considering a cheaper "off" brand running shoe. I'm wondering if anyone has suggestions on a brand or shoe, or advice arguing why this is not a good idea? Are the well-known brands really better than the unknown brands? [more inside]
posted by Lutoslawski at 9:16 AM PST - 31 comments

Where can I get professional feedback on a web design?

Is there somewhere online where I can get feedback on a web design project. I just "finished" (or maybe not quite, depending on the feedback) my first big design and would really like some input on my design decisions.
posted by mkuhnell at 9:04 AM PST - 4 comments

What other shoes are like these Nikes?

I have a pair of these 2018 Nike Free RN Flyknit shoes and love them. But they aren't very durable. What other shoes should I look at that might be similar? [more inside]
posted by msbrauer at 9:00 AM PST - 6 comments

How do I turn my living room into a Glamour Shots?

For an upcoming birthday, my friends and I want to fulfill our grade school desires of getting glamour shots done. I know some basic props - wigs, silk gloves, feather boas, shirts with huge collars you can grab on to - but I'm less sure of how to get that characteristic "glamour shot" look. [more inside]
posted by bookwo3107 at 8:42 AM PST - 7 comments

Should I euthanize my dog?

I'm at a cross road. My dog who is 14.5 years old was diagnosed with cancer that had spread to her lungs in January. I made a decision at that point to not go through any medication or chemo and just to keep her comfortable and free from pain. She hasn't shown any signs of pain, she still eats with a little coaxing (broth or meat in her food), she's always hungry, she still seems to be happy to see me, but she has slowly deteriorated in weight and is coughing more at night. I brought her in for another check up yesterday for xray comparison and blood work. The Xrays showed that the tumor has taken over both lungs, and in other areas - the mass has grown exponentially since January and she has lost 10 lbs while still eating. The mass is pressing her esophagus up a bit, causing her to cough, and you can see that is has pushed her abdomen. My vet, who usually does not say things of this nature, advised me that now would be the kindest time for me to euthanize before she starts to deteriorate anymore and suffer because of the mass in her lungs and how fast she is losing weight. I don't want to see her get to the stage of being in pain or suffering, and part of me thinks that with her starting to cough more and gasp a bit, and her weight loss that now would be the best time because of the speed of growth this may take over quickly. I have a four year old that I have started to prepare but at the same time it pains me to think of walking her into the vet like this to say goodbye. Part of me thinks its right, but part of me feels so guilty. Anyone had any experience or suggestions?
posted by MamaBee223 at 8:32 AM PST - 38 comments

What would a child with a broken leg want?

My manager has been very supportive during my pregnancy, leave, and return to work, both intangibly and by way of little gifts. Her 3 year old son broke his leg yesterday, badly enough to need surgery. I'd like to make a gesture of sympathy, but besides a card, I can't think of what would be helpful but also appropriate for our relationship. Ideas?
posted by redlines at 8:23 AM PST - 20 comments

Inexpensive way to FaceTime kids

Looking for a device that would allow grandchildren (3 and 7) to communicate via FaceTime. It could be an inexpensive phone or some other device. I honestly don't know how other devices work, but we are willing to try alternatives. IF you recommend something like a Kindle or iPod Touch, do I need to put them on my phone plan, or do they use wifi? I know this sounds soooo ignorant, but it's hard to suss out from looking at the ads exactly how these things work, and we just want to talk to the grandkids!
posted by mmf at 7:59 AM PST - 12 comments

Good mic/headset for speech recognition despite other speakers close by?

Small team looking to try dictation on Dragon NaturallySpeaking in an open-space setup; need mic that will pick voice well, but not the background noise. [more inside]
posted by CelebrenIthil at 6:54 AM PST - 10 comments

Getting less sleep as I age -- any solutions?

I'm sleeping about six and a half hours nowadays. Five years ago, a good night's sleep was seven and a quarter. I can remember times in my life I was able to sleep 10. How do I get back to that? [more inside]
posted by Borborygmus at 3:55 AM PST - 26 comments

Examples of overly simple solutions that were wrong

I'm working on a piece for which some really pithily-expressed examples of simple "solutions" that don't/didn't help at all -- but that everyone will immediately recognize -- would be helpful. [more inside]
posted by amtho at 1:31 AM PST - 83 comments

October 14

Heard it through the grapevine?

Can you think of an (android) app that fulfils my vineyard-management-wishlist? [more inside]
posted by any_name_in_a_storm at 11:32 PM PST - 4 comments

New Yorker Baggy Shirts

For years, a small company sold baggy, collared, button-down dress shirts through the mail and advertised in the New Yorker. Apparently they don't advertise anymore. I think they were located in Rhode Island. I've searched and can't find the company.Does anyone know who they are?
posted by tesseract420 at 9:50 PM PST - 5 comments

Help me name my apartment

I just moved and my new apartment hasn't quite told me its name yet. It's definitely something to do with sanctuary, hideaway, garden, forest, oasis, peace... It's also very small, and oddly-shaped, which could contribute to the name but doesn't have to. I've been trying to think of literary/fictional place names, but any ideas along the themes above would be welcome! Note that The Secret Garden has been rejected for I-am-12 reasons.
posted by rhiannonstone at 9:10 PM PST - 39 comments

Portland-centered crappy-road daytrips* for fall and winter

About 6 months ago I bought a new Crosstrek. I would like to make sure I am getting out and doing enough with it to make it worth it. [more inside]
posted by curious nu at 8:44 PM PST - 3 comments

Does fluoride varnish make your teeth ache and is it worth doing for me?

I went to a new dentist today for a new patient intake / 6mo cleaning. They asked me if I wanted a $30 fluoride varnish - something my wonderful old dentist never did. I said ok, and now my teeth hurt. I googled it and nothing much came up - is that normal? Also, how effective is it for an adult of my profile? [more inside]
posted by vegartanipla at 7:32 PM PST - 9 comments

Please Help Me Find This Poem About the Moon

Please help me find the title and author of this poem. My partner put an audio version of it on a CD for me probably 8 years ago - long gone of course. Details below! [more inside]
posted by PuddleWonderful at 6:48 PM PST - 4 comments

Pittsburgh reduce

I used to live in Bloomfield, Pittsburgh. My stuff has been in an attic the last few years because... I need to reduce my large pile of belongings. I figure I'll drop things off to various places. What non-profits would like donated items? Anything specific - like for books, clothes, kitchen items? I partially don't want to overload one place and my PGH knowledge is out of date. Who is rad?!
posted by PistachioRoux at 5:53 PM PST - 3 comments

How realistic would physics be on a modern high end dice simulation?

Let's say that you had professional developers create a simulation of two six sided die impacting a specific material and being thrown in specific ways by an industrial robotic arm. How realistic could you make this given high end modern physics simulation software? [more inside]
posted by codacorolla at 3:52 PM PST - 16 comments

Should I complain and how? And how to avoid--bad blood draw at lab.

Some people have told me I have "hard to find" veins, so I went to the lab to get bloodwork done instead of at my GP's office after the nurse seemed to be a little unsure/uncomfortable with it. At patient lab today, the person who drew my blood just stuck the needle in hard and energetically and confidently fished around in my arm (ugh) until I told her, "I don't think you're in the right place." [more inside]
posted by Bluebird Wine at 3:11 PM PST - 22 comments

My dog tore his CCL, please help me think through my options!

I have a 4 year old, 72 lb Belgian Shepherd I rescued from the SPCA who was born with hip and elbow dysplasia. His left hip is worse, and he tended to favor that leg, and now he's torn his right CCL (knee ligament) when he ran too hard through the yard. He needs surgery, and I need advice. Please help!! Puppy tax here. His name is Fenris and he is a very good boy. [more inside]
posted by ananci at 2:57 PM PST - 6 comments

Hopeless feelings software development jobs

My husband is a back-end software developer. He has seen a lot of ageism in this field, and is worried about how sustainable it is for him, especially as he is thinking longer term about his career and our life. I'm not in the field so I don't have perspective on this, and I'd really welcome others' thoughts. Separately but relatedly, he also struggles with depression and when this sort of work is very deadline-based with too much happening, he gets really stressed and anxious and can spiral pretty quickly from there. Are there programmer roles that are typically less stressful types of roles that folks would recommend he pursue?
posted by jenbo1 at 2:32 PM PST - 18 comments

Why do airlines in the US let people bring luggage on board?

It happens on every flight I take: the overhead bins fill up with roller bags, so the flight attendants ask if anyone will check their bag at the door. The passengers who take that offer that don't have to pay the $25-ish checked baggage fee that people who checked their bags earlier did. There is no downside for a passenger doing this, as far as I can tell -- either you get to take your extra bag as a carry-on, or you get your bag checked for free. But what's the airlines' motivation for letting this happen? [more inside]
posted by The corpse in the library at 1:55 PM PST - 30 comments

Which food/grocery delivery service is best in Richmond, VA?

I was hoping to send a gift card for something like Seamless, GrubHub, Uber Eats, etc., to new parents in the Richmond, VA, area. Do any of those services exist in any real way there? If so, which one offers the most (or best) options? If not, is grocery delivery (e.g., Peapod) an easy/useful alternative?
posted by unknowncommand at 1:50 PM PST - 1 comment

Career not spent sitting at a desk

What are some careers/paths of study for someone smart who has said they don't want to sit in an office their whole life? [more inside]
posted by wenestvedt at 1:23 PM PST - 34 comments

Emergency Halloween costume ideas!

Please help this Halloween costume lazy-head come up with an easy, but fun last minute Halloween costume. [more inside]
posted by melorama at 1:08 PM PST - 18 comments

Does this pattern exist?

I want to make these dragon wings for my kids for Halloween. The pattern maker is no longer in business. Can the pattern be found? [more inside]
posted by tealcake at 12:33 PM PST - 4 comments

Looking for a TV and wall mount with minimal projection

How close can I get a TV to the wall? [more inside]
posted by bajema at 11:40 AM PST - 6 comments

Explain commanding in chief like I'm 5

What were the exact steps in the process of US troops leaving Northern Syria after Trump decided it should be so? [more inside]
posted by nantucket at 11:26 AM PST - 4 comments

Socially conscious jewelry company on Instagram

I'm trying to remember the name of a jewelry business that served me an ad on Instagram that prompted me to follow their account because they used a ton of diverse bodies in their ads and talked about the importance of offering jewelry that fit fat bodies, like larger size rings. I got tired of being tempted by their lovely jewelry so I stopped following them, then eventually I stopped using Instagram so there's no data on any ads I've interacted with since that only goes back 90 days. [more inside]
posted by the thorn bushes have roses at 10:50 AM PST - 5 comments

Expense tracking app (iOS), manual and local?

I'm looking for an expense tracking app that's fully functional in airplane mode (doesn't require a non-local user account or integration with any external accounts/cards) and lets the user both define their own expense categories and eliminate any pre-existing categories.
posted by kalapierson at 10:49 AM PST - 2 comments

Help me plan my dream itinerary for 2 weeks in Southeast Asia

I want to spend 12/20/2019 to 01/04/2020 traveling in Southeast Asia. Help me put together my dream itinerary! [more inside]
posted by panama joe at 9:03 AM PST - 10 comments

iPhone 11 Bluetooth Headphones

Some slight change the iPhone 11 made to Bluetooth broke my Anker Soundbuds Slim's ability to connect. They are working on a hardware update but I'd prefer to be wireless ASAP. Seeking recommendations for wireless headphones that are confirmed working on iPhone 11. I prefer earbuds that are connected and can hang around my neck, I am too afraid of bud only headphones like AirPods flying out away.
posted by yellowbinder at 8:23 AM PST - 4 comments

Help me figure out a very specific beginner crochet project?

I want to make a very lightweight, simple, crocheted "neck-warmer" (I'm not really sure what to call it); I'm a complete newb at crochet and need a pretty easy pattern / instructions. Help? [more inside]
posted by taz at 8:02 AM PST - 23 comments

Furnish my roof deck

We recently acquired a roof deck, yay! Alas, so many options for outdoor furniture... what are the best value for quality items I can buy? [more inside]
posted by DoubleLune at 7:03 AM PST - 11 comments

Cleaning a Smelly Thrift Store Coat

I have a Persian Lamb coat from a thrift store. Like always, there is that thrift store smell. If I take it to be cleaned at a professional fur cleaner, will the smell likely be gone afterward? From what I understand, they will tumble it with some sawdust and gentle cleaning fluid, then vacuum it, and coat it with conditioning oils. Will any part of the typical process remove the smell? Anyone have direct experience with such things? [more inside]
posted by thegreatfleecircus at 6:59 AM PST - 3 comments

Can I fence with a medical port?

I may be up for some more intense treatment for my multiple myeloma (still collecting second opinions). In the past, I've gotten oral and subcutaneous therapy, but my doc wants to put me on something that requires frequent IVs. I have terrible veins, but I've always resisted getting a port because I thought I'd have to give up fencing. My oncologist says I might be able to fence. What say MeFites? [more inside]
posted by FencingGal at 6:46 AM PST - 16 comments

A Blast from the Past

While going through a storage shed, I found a pristine Tandy RL 1000 setup with a dot matrix printer, original diskettes, monitor, PC and catalog. And when I connected all of the peripherals and turned it on, it booted up. I'd heard that these kind of vintage computers are highly sought after. What is it worth, really?
posted by CollectiveMind at 5:43 AM PST - 2 comments

Win10 laptop, suddenly unable to see the wi-fi it's been using for ages.

Love to hear any clever network troubleshooting suggestions you folks may have. Deeply annoying details inside. [more inside]
posted by Sing Or Swim at 5:37 AM PST - 10 comments

Was Upton Sinclair ever recorded reading The Jungle?

I am after public-domain recordings of speeches from suffragists, socialists, communists or other social reformers/utopians! [more inside]
posted by Cantdosleepy at 4:22 AM PST - 3 comments

Corporate IT strategies, small but perfectly formed edition

You are a small (say under 50 people) company. What software tools do you use on a daily basis to get things done? [more inside]
posted by meronym at 4:22 AM PST - 9 comments

Looking for passage from Michael Crichton book

The passage I'm searching for is about how the tide is constantly changing. A mother will look at her little boy and think this is forever but time is moving on. The shoreline keeps changing. [more inside]
posted by Coffeetyme at 3:37 AM PST - 1 comment

Energy use in buildings: explain like I'm 5

Why do we focus on reducing the energy demands produced by buildings (like heating and ventilation) if the energy still comes from nonrenewable sources with a high CO2 footprint? More below the fold: [more inside]
posted by luminary at 2:58 AM PST - 14 comments

A MaCy gray area.

Does anyone have any recollection of a live awards type program but not an awards show that was more of a tribute special to the rock and roll genre where I specifically saw an AMAZING cover of Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds sung by Macy Gray? I have been wracking my brain for years trying to find it and I cant remember what station it was on, what year or why it was even on. It was sometime between 1998 and 2003 [more inside]
posted by The_imp_inimpossible at 12:55 AM PST - 4 comments

October 13

Is not-great therapy better than no therapy?

Had my first appointment with a new therapist recently and to be honest she wasn’t great. A couple of small red flags, but my biggest objection was that we weren’t a personality fit. I’m unsure whether to continue. [more inside]
posted by EatMyHat at 11:51 PM PST - 14 comments

Is Kedah FA playing Tai Po in Alor Setar, Malaysia on 21 January 2020?

I'd like to attend this match, but I can't find out if, when and where this 2020 Asian Football Confederation Champions League preliminary round 2 football game is happening. [more inside]
posted by mdonley at 10:25 PM PST - 0 comments

Why is refrigerator/freezer door hard to open?

My apartment recently got a brand new refrigerator. I've noticed that after opening the freezer or refrigerator door and then closing, I can hear a what sounds like air being sucked in. If I try to open either door, I can't without a LOT of force. After a few minutes of being left alone the door opens okay. It doesn't do this on every open and close, but enough that I'm questioning what's going on.
posted by 922257033c4a0f3cecdbd819a46d626999d1af4a at 10:18 PM PST - 9 comments

How do I manage this?

I'm struggling to communicate to my parents the necessity of taking my elderly maternal grandmother to the hospital when something alarming happens. [more inside]
posted by elsmith at 10:02 PM PST - 8 comments

Coping with megacrunch

It's mega crunch time at work for the next two and a half months. What are your best tips for getting through it and keeping sane and productive? [more inside]
posted by moons in june at 9:16 PM PST - 14 comments

What's Up Bitches?

What's the origin of the phrase "What's up bitches?!" (ref: ERB Winston Churchill vs. Theodore Roosevelt)
posted by The Blue Olly at 8:11 PM PST - 2 comments

Apple ][ game - Labyrinth

Hi all, I'm looking for a disk image for the Apple ][ game Labyrinth shown in this video - last time I did this search I got a bunch of hits for a different game of the same name. Thanks in advance!
posted by AdaJoy at 7:55 PM PST - 2 comments

Looking for activity ideas near Minocqua, Wisconsin October 21-26.

We are two people in our 50s headed up to the north woods for a 15th anniversary cabin getaway trip. Not our first time, but we'd like to hear from others about places/things/experiences that are either in Minocqua, Wisconsin (Booth Lake vicinity) or within a day trip from Minocqua that could be fun or interesting to experience. [more inside]
posted by mcbeth at 7:37 PM PST - 6 comments

Where to buy custom basic gold jewelry nowadays?

I want to buy some custom jewelry -- probably a bracelet or necklace, with some kind of engraving of a short message (haven't quite figured out what I want yet). I've had bad and so-so luck with previous jewelry purchased from well-reviewed Etsy sellers, but I also don't want to go to, like, Tiffany. What's in between those two? [more inside]
posted by BlahLaLa at 7:04 PM PST - 4 comments

Having my cake and living in it too

I’ve lived in dense cities for my entire adult life and really like most aspects of it. However, I have some hobbies that are noisy and messy (think woodworking, light metalworking) that I have found can be at odds with “polite” apartment living. How/where do I look for living spaces/arrangements where such activities (not every day; more like one weekend a month) are welcome, or at least more tolerated, without having to move out of an urban environment? Is it possible to bring this up with landlords without setting off “POTENTIAL NUISANCE TENANT” alarms in their heads? [more inside]
posted by btfreek at 6:06 PM PST - 9 comments

Seeking exemplary qualitative health research presentations

I'm preparing to give a 15-20 minute presentation at a public health conference in November on a qualitative research project I undertook at my former employer. I'd like to review some successful presentations of qualitative health research as I prepare for my presentation. Could you point me to videos of effective conference presentations in this vein that are available for free online? Examples of good slide decks would also be useful. [more inside]
posted by reren at 5:48 PM PST - 2 comments

My beautiful blue broom

I remember seeing for a sale a beautiful broom online many years ago. It was a vivid trap or aquamarine color. It was very pretty, so pretty that the person who posted the link claimed they had painted their kitchen a complementary color in order to display it publicly. I can’t find anything similar for sale online (or not for sale), just cheap plastic stuff. Did I imagine this broom or did it really exist?
posted by bq at 5:06 PM PST - 5 comments

Sources for Learning Pen and Ink Technique

What are your best recommendations for learning to draw with pen and ink? I have some general grasp of composition, but I'm wondering about videos, books, or other sources of technique descriptions, demos, or exercises. [more inside]
posted by cupcakeninja at 4:58 PM PST - 6 comments

Book recommendation: Malcolm X

I'd like to read a good historical book about Malcolm X -- hoping Mefites can recommend one. Ideally it would be light on personal history (except where it informs the following) and more focused on his ideas and how they evolved, his work/relationships/interactions with various groups/movements, how he was perceived (by the US government, by other black leaders, US society, etc.), puts him in historical context, etc. [more inside]
posted by duoshao at 4:50 PM PST - 4 comments

getting a new supervisor; how can I keep my unofficial job perks?

I may type this out in some detail below but I guess the basic question is: what's the best way to convey to a new supervisor, "here's some stuff my old supervisor let me get away with that it is important to me to continue doing?" [more inside]
posted by less of course at 4:41 PM PST - 9 comments

Bedding Wonderland

Recommend the best sheets and comforter for our soon-to-be-delivered California king. I love soft and satiny/silky but not t shirt.
posted by bookworm4125 at 4:00 PM PST - 1 comment

A welcoming fantasy role-playing community? On-line?

Asking for a friend who got her first taste of fantasy role playing when some people asked her to join a weekly D&D game last year. It was very low key and friendly and she had a great time. The game fell apart and she was wondering if she could find something similar on-line since there is nothing else within her local friend network. [more inside]
posted by metahawk at 2:58 PM PST - 4 comments

Songs to commit to

I'm trying to build a playlist of songs about committing to one's art / work / values (or commitment in the abstract, just not in the explicitly romantic sense) -- anything with the theme of not wasting time or hesitating. Help me add to it? [more inside]
posted by Westringia F. at 2:29 PM PST - 19 comments

How to find an MDMA therapist in New York

I wonder how one goes about finding a psychedelic therapist using MDMA in New York. Asking for a scared friend.
posted by DMelanogaster at 2:28 PM PST - 6 comments

Media recommendations about MRA culture

I was recently very interested and moved by reading “Stories About my Brother” by Prachi Gupta (thanks Countess Elena for sharing on the blue!). I’ve had similar but less extreme experiences with a family member getting into MRA culture, and realized I’d like to read more about it and especially about deradicalization and how people have left that subculture or similar subcultures. Looking for books, podcasts and research articles in particular! [more inside]
posted by switcheroo at 2:14 PM PST - 3 comments

HElp rescue Orion from MinGW DLL hell

I'm trying to compile some changes I made to 1OOM on WIndows. I've never done this before. I am used to Unix and Mac OS, which are much friendlier to my command-line centered workflow. [more inside]
posted by Alensin at 1:51 PM PST - 6 comments

Meet the parents, en español

My boyfriend and I have been dating for the better part of this year, and we moved in together just over 3 months ago. Now we're discussing hosting Thanksgiving next month and cooking for his parents. Added challenge: I'm white. His parents are Mexican and mostly speak Spanish. He's met my parent and sibling (and it went very well), but I haven't met his parents yet. I want this to go well! I'd love your cultural and linguistic advice. [more inside]
posted by INTJ at 1:25 PM PST - 16 comments

What should I do in Denver?

I have a day by myself in Denver this week. Where should I drink beer and coffee and eat? [more inside]
posted by MisantropicPainforest at 12:32 PM PST - 4 comments

Michael Caine film quote

This is a long shot but I'm hoping some Michael Caine aficionados on the green can help me out. [more inside]
posted by cartoonella at 11:49 AM PST - 4 comments

RFC2812 RPL_MYINFO Parsing

RFC2812 indicates two mode sets in a response. I'm seeing three. What is the last set of mode characters (bkloveqjfI) for? [more inside]
posted by Johnny Waterbed at 11:14 AM PST - 2 comments

Need good item for pet hair on hardwood floor

I have a house where the downstairs is entirely hardwood floors and I have two dogs who shed moderately. I am looking for your advice for either a cordless stick vacuum or a robot vac. I don't want to spend typical Dyson prices, but want something effective for just hardwood. I do not want canister or big vacuums. Any pet owners with recommendations for what has worked well for you? Didn't work well? Thanks!
posted by Rad_Boy at 10:31 AM PST - 15 comments

Resources for Iraqi immigrant family new to Dallas

Asking for a friend of a friend - an Iraqi translator is moving with their family to Dallas. Unfortunately, don't have more details than that, but do you know some immigrant-friendly organizations/services in Dallas that could be useful for them? [more inside]
posted by Geameade at 10:06 AM PST - 4 comments

I command thee . . . name that book or movie!

I read a book, maybe 5-10 years ago, probably a magical type fantasy book (or possibly movie or tv) where one of the characters had the ability to issue commands through some supernatural power when he or she was speaking. I remember it in my head like the person saying "Shut the door" in a normal voice, but a deep, magically reverberating, maybe slowed down version of his voice said the command at the same time, and other characters were compelled in a zombie-like way to shut the door. Ringing any bells? South Park? Harry Potter? Heroes?
posted by bluesky78987 at 8:19 AM PST - 10 comments

Neighborhood to stay in Valencia Spain

What part of the Valencia Spain would be good for us to rent an apartment for a week? Family of 4, 2 adults 2 teenage daughters. We like to be able to walk to markets, restaurants, etc. and enjoy the vibe of the city. We want to have a place with the ability to cook some of our own meals, do laundry, etc. This is probably something we'll book with airbnb, but if there are other options I'd be interested.
posted by mcstayinskool at 6:47 AM PST - 1 comment

Mr. 40, E and Mr. $hort, Too?

What is the correct way to refer to persons in writing with non-"traditional" names, say, stage/performance names like the rappers "Too Short" and "E-40"? [more inside]
posted by stillmoving at 6:46 AM PST - 15 comments

What is visible to someone whose proxy server I'm using?

For work, I am visiting a university that has a very strict firewall. Like, I can't even access Outlook (which is where my work email and calendar live), Google Drive (where all my work files live), or Zoom and Skype (which I need for work-related meetings). A colleague here has shared his proxy server settings with me so I can bypass this firewall and access these things. What potential privacy implications should I be aware of? Assume I know nothing about networking. I only have a wikipedia-level knowledge of what a proxy server even is. [more inside]
posted by lollusc at 4:54 AM PST - 9 comments

SF/Fantasy Movie/Show ID

Posted for a family member: I'm going crazy trying to remember what show or movie I saw a certain plot thread in. Probably fantasy or SF or pseudo-historical, involving an exotic, backward culture with a superstition that twin births were a form of defect in which a single person was born with two bodies, so that a pair of identical twins was raised as a single individual, and natives had a taboo against acknowledging that there was more than one person present, got confused when outsiders asked for the second twin's name, etc. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 12:48 AM PST - 4 comments

Scam calls from foreign numbers that appear as domestic

How does one caller ID system show me a different number for the same caller. One has +1 (appearing as a US Domestic call), the other does not (appearing as International). [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 12:48 AM PST - 2 comments

How do I turn my iPhone into a dictaphone?

I want an iPhone app that will let me make multiple short voice recordings over the course of the day, appending them to a single audio file instead of creating a new recording each time. I also want this to be very quick—just open the app, press REC, and talk. (I don’t want to open the app, select a recording, select edit... etc. This is why Voice Memos isn’t doing it for me.) Basically I want to use my phone like Agent Cooper uses his dictaphone. Is there an app that will let me do this?
posted by No-sword at 12:19 AM PST - 4 comments

October 12

Excel - assign value to cell in irregular grid for a planted wall

Hi everyone, I'm working on a timber crib wall with a builder. With crib walls you can have planted cells across the wall according to some simple rules*. I want as random a pattern as possible so wondered if it was possible to do this in Excel 2016. I hope this sort of job would come up more often and this would simplify the design process. [more inside]
posted by unearthed at 11:55 PM PST - 6 comments

Cork handbags: durable?

I'm considering purchasing a cork handbag. Are cork "leather" bags durable and long lasting for daily use? [more inside]
posted by holyrood at 9:13 PM PST - 8 comments

e-book libraries with privileges for nonresidents?

Are there e-book lending libraries I can join that I don't have to show residence? I'm not talking about the public domain stuff like gutenberg. I know gutenberg, I love gutenberg, but that's not what I mean. I mean a lending library where I can check out e-books like I do from my local libraries. [more inside]
posted by fingersandtoes at 8:24 PM PST - 21 comments

Northern Virginia couples counselor, challenge level autism

Do you know a couples counselor with experience with couples where one partner is on the autism spectrum and the other isn't? Location is Northern Virginia, ideally in the Reston/Herndon area. [more inside]
posted by at home in my head at 7:26 PM PST - 1 comment

Word processor on the IBM 5150

What word processor would have been available to use on the IBM 5150 (the first IBM desktop PC)? My dad is trying to remember what he would have used when he bought the PC in 1982.
posted by CiaoMela at 7:01 PM PST - 10 comments

Transporting parent with dementia across the country

Greetings! My mother is in a declining state of dementia and lives in an assisted living facility in upstate New York, near my brother. For several reasons, my brother and I will be moving her to a memory care home in California, near me, within the next month or so. We need to act quickly as this is all happening much faster than expected. [more inside]
posted by htm at 6:45 PM PST - 15 comments

kindle dictionaries help

I'm reading a novel on my Kindle 4 and it's in English but has a lot of French phrases that I want to look up. [more inside]
posted by needs more cowbell at 5:35 PM PST - 2 comments

Kitchen chemistry question

I tried making a lemon poppyseed loaf mix with vinegar plus baking soda as an egg substitute, to middling success. Then I drank some “light” pink lemonade—again from a mix—and it tasted terrible. Not bubbly, just unpleasant. Now that I’ve been finished with my slice for a while, the same glass of lemonade tastes fine. What kind of reaction happened? [more inside]
posted by Countess Elena at 5:00 PM PST - 3 comments

I want to see some magic

I live in the SF Bay Area and I'd like to see one of these cool magicians I keep reading profiles of. Anyone with a finger on the pulse of the modern magic scene can direct me to an upcoming performance I can check out?
posted by latkes at 4:34 PM PST - 2 comments

Friends’ opinions of new dating prospect

I just started dating again after some time away and have met someone whom I feel tentatively good about so far. My friend made a pretty negative comment about him and I’m having a hard time getting out of my head about it. Help me get perspective. [more inside]
posted by deus ex machina at 4:09 PM PST - 50 comments

Alternatives to my fitness pal?

I’ve been using MyFitness Pal for weight loss and have been happy with it. For reasons, I now need an alternative, ideally an app. Please give me your suggestions! [more inside]
posted by EatMyHat at 3:07 PM PST - 12 comments

Interesting documentary biology films for university students

My department has a Biology Film Series that showcases documentary films on biological topics; we then have a discussion on the ideas presented in the film. We would like some more ideas of different films to screen. Please give me recommendations for films! Caveats inside. [more inside]
posted by Peter Petridish at 2:31 PM PST - 6 comments

Which are the top CS colleges in Australia?

So just like the title says, which are the best programs. I'm looking for a master's in science. I want to do research but I'd also like a university that has an entrepreneurial focus as well as strong industry connections. I don't know much about Australian universities. Thanks in advance.
posted by Tarsonis10 at 2:04 PM PST - 8 comments

Anyone know a reliable Mac person north of Burbank?

Have a friend with an older mac with a virus (resourcessource), may need to restore from hard drive backup and time machine :) 10.13.6 (high sierra)
posted by tilde at 1:50 PM PST - 0 comments

Do I really have to eat oatmeal for a year?

How do you figure out what is triggering your migraines? I believe I have been having migraines for a couple of years, but its only recently that I've realised the things I THOUGHT were causing my headaches (noisy children, gin and tonics, an iphone, and stress) are not the main culprits. Or not the only ones anyway. [more inside]
posted by catspajammies at 1:34 PM PST - 26 comments

Which of These Canon Printers is the Best?

Bought a new - not in box - Canon Pixma MX395 - the paper feeder doesn't work - and now am looking for the best model among these - MG-3650-white, MG-3150, MG-3155, MX-524, MG-3650-red, MX-525, MG-2150, MG-4140, MG-3650, MX-375, MG-3550, MG-2250, MX-475, MG-2255, MX-535, MX-515, MG-4250, MX-370, MG-3140, MX-435, MX-455, MX-454, MG-3250, MG-2140, MG-3255, MG-4150 for which I can use the 2 brand new inks that I purchased. Anything better than the MX395. Thank you.
posted by watercarrier at 1:18 PM PST - 1 comment

Difference in emotional maturity when dating

I am seriously considering parting ways with someone I've been seeing romantically. I think we are now at different stages of emotional maturity and want really different things. Knowing my own limitations and inexperience, though, I turn to you, AskMeFi, for feedback and insight. [more inside]
posted by redwaterman at 1:15 PM PST - 12 comments

My dad is in recovery from major surgery; need a big long checklist.

My dad just had major emergency surgery; they didn't think he was going to live, but now he is apparently quite stable. He is lucid when he's awake, and so far he can easily answer random and fun, non-complicated yes/no questions, but he's otherwise nonfunctional, and recovery will be slow. My mom and I are trying to come up with a mega checklist of everything we should do. [more inside]
posted by zeek321 at 1:09 PM PST - 20 comments

Mum threatening to divorce my 75yr old dad

Following my previous post about mum threatening to leave my sis out of the will/give her almost nothing if she doesn't care for them in old age, mum is now threatening to divorce dad every time he doesn't do what she says, and has many blow-up rows with him. Dad says she's been the main driver of my abuse in the house. They are so old and everything is so messy I don't know how to react. Any advice welcome. [more inside]
posted by abbagoochie at 12:54 PM PST - 15 comments

(How) can I use my Surface Pen in an app running on an emulator?

For my sins, I frequently need to mark up a lot of student papers submitted through the an online system called "Canvas." They only offer rudimentary pen support in their web app. Apparently it works great in their "Canvas Teacher" app on Android, but that leaves my Surface Go-owning self out in the cold. Sadly, neither the pen nor pinch-to-zoom works for me when I tried using Canvas Teacher in Bluestacks. Is there an emulator out there that will work? It doesn't have to be free. [more inside]
posted by col_pogo at 12:16 PM PST - 2 comments

Punk and what else aren't dead?

A recognizable punk subculture has existed — across generations, mostly without help from nuclear families and major institutions, and in a way that goes much, much deeper than just a musical genre — for 45 years and counting. What multigenerational subcultures have lasted longer? Historical ones that fizzled out long ago and modern ones that are still going both count. [more inside]
posted by nebulawindphone at 12:13 PM PST - 25 comments

What's the easiest way to get kids playing Minecraft together?

I am a teen librarian and there is interest in having a Minecraft Club at the library. The last time we did this (2 years ago) we used laptops running the Java edition. I understand now that the Bedrock version is compatible with more devices and might make it easier for more kids to play. [more inside]
posted by Biblio at 11:58 AM PST - 3 comments

Help me find two CBC radio specials on 3 Mile Island

Years ago I heard two CBC radio specials on the Three Mile Island disaster, or possibly one with two parts? Could I get some help finding them? I think one or both of them might have been part of the Ideas series. [more inside]
posted by Canageek at 11:28 AM PST - 6 comments

Children's books: Historical

Seeking recommendations for kids books (from picture books to middle grade) that are set in a historical period/help teach history. Primary criteria: Fun and Accuracy [more inside]
posted by Cozybee at 10:33 AM PST - 16 comments

Cleaning/Sanitizing a Friend's Portable Toilet

During the recent Northern California blackout, I was without power and water (my home is on a well). An awesome co-worker loaned me a Thetford Porta Potti portable toilet. Yay! Now I have power back, so I want to return the toilet. What the hell is the appropriate level of sanitation/cleaning required, both in terms of "You loaned me something to poop in" and "This is a semi-specialized piece of camping equipment that probably requires some amount of babying"? [more inside]
posted by lazuli at 8:55 AM PST - 11 comments

Safe or Sorry: cooked chicken bought last Sunday

Last Sunday I bought chicken tenders (not breaded) wrapped in bacon -- pre-cooked and refrigerated -- from a bakery that sells ready to eat meals, then forgot to eat them! They haven't moved from the refrigerator since then. What say you AskMe? Safe to eat or not?
posted by duoshao at 5:52 AM PST - 29 comments

Why would a bank not evict after a foreclosure and collect insurance?

I am trying to help a friend figure out their housing situation. Her home has been foreclosed on and the bank was the winning bidder at the Sheriff’s auction, which in our state means the bank is essentially the owner of the home. As I understand it, they should be able to evict them and file an insurance claim on the mortgage covering the unpaid balance of the mortgage plus legal expenses and Sheriff’s fees, but they are not and are trying to sell the house at a private auction. Why? [more inside]
posted by Short End Of A Wishbone at 3:01 AM PST - 8 comments

I have an idea, what next?

I have an idea for a product. It isn’t groundbreaking, like it won’t change the world, but is something that doesn’t seem to exist but could be used worldwide (I think). The design would technically be adapting design(s) for things that already exist but which haven’t been used for this purpose. I have no experience at all in manufacturing/selling/making prototypes. I am in the UK but not England. Where on earth do I start, if only to hear from a person who knows: “forget it”, or ideally: “great idea! Here’s what you need to do...”
posted by anonymous at 12:24 AM PST - 7 comments

Repatriating relative with severe mental health issues from Aus to NZ

My Kiwi relative is suffering from severe delusions and hallucinations but can appear normal to people who don't spend an extended period of time with her. She was house-sitting for me in Melbourne when I was overseas and the neighbours contacted me regarding her verbally aggressive behaviour while I was away. I've paid for temporary accommodation as I promised the neighbours she would move out, plus I found it hard to be patient with her regarding her delusions as most of her conversations are about them. She and I are on good terms. She doesn't want to go back to New Zealand. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 12:24 AM PST - 2 comments

October 11

Anxiety About Vegas

I have a conference starting on Wednesday, in Vegas. I will be there for about three days. I have autism, and pretty severe anxiety. [more inside]
posted by PinkMoose at 11:49 PM PST - 10 comments

Therapist recommendations in NYC?

Can you recommend me a therapist in midtown/downtown Manhattan or Brooklyn? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 10:33 PM PST - 3 comments

Time to let our bunny go?

We have an elder bun with health problems who was declining, but now seems to be perking up again. Is this a sign of recovery, or is this a last wind before the end? (Plus there's a time issue here as well). [more inside]
posted by gtrwolf at 9:28 PM PST - 5 comments

Nice fiction to read aloud

My boyfriend and I are looking for a novel to read aloud together — preferably YA fantasy, but other fiction is good too. Something interesting enough to hold adults' attention, but simple and peaceful enough to read at sleepytime. More details inside. [more inside]
posted by Banknote of the year at 9:16 PM PST - 20 comments

How should I propagate this begonia cutting?

I recently bought a Begonia pavonina cutting that I'm hoping to grow into a houseplant. Can I propagate it in water or do I have to do that bonkers thing where you stick the leaf in soil? [more inside]
posted by evidenceofabsence at 7:26 PM PST - 4 comments

Tea: Second Course

Micro McGee, 8, is a tiny Anglophile. He had a day off school last week and I took him to afternoon tea at a local pub. NOW ALL HE WANTS IS TEA-MEAL, which I'm going to make at home. But I don't love scones enough to eat them that often. What can I substitute? [more inside]
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 7:23 PM PST - 31 comments

Ube Powder in SF?

Where can I buy ube (or less ideally, taro) powder in San Francisco? [more inside]
posted by wym at 5:51 PM PST - 2 comments

Should I write my boss this email before I quit?

Should I write my boss this email before I quit, asking him why he handled it the way he did? [more inside]
posted by critzer at 4:56 PM PST - 42 comments

Car collision where only car has damage - what do you do about insurance

Let's say hypothetically you backed up into another vehicle, but only your vehicle has damage. Would you call your insurance company? What would you say? [more inside]
posted by Mushroom12345 at 4:44 PM PST - 9 comments

Should I do this, or get my accountant to do this?

Canada Revenue Agency Filter! I recieved a letter from the CRA (an official one, not a scam) that they're reviewing the tuition fees I claimed on my taxes. I read the letter, and understand which form (T2202A) and which tax schedule I need to send to them (Schedule 11). However, for the first time in my life I had an accountant do my taxes... should I get my accountant to do this? This seems easy enough to do on my own, but I'm also being cheap. [more inside]
posted by VirginiaPlain at 4:30 PM PST - 4 comments

Mitsubishi HVAC -- residential v. commercial systems?

HVAC nerd question: long tragic story how this happened, but our Mitsubishi installer just completed the job for our house (New York City, northern Bronx). Only then did we learn what actual systems were installed: a commercial system in a residential deployment. [more inside]
posted by cloudscratcher at 4:15 PM PST - 2 comments

Best games with that gotta-catch-em-all vibe

What games should I play on a (somewhat elderly) MacOS laptop or an iphone that are RPG ish but focused on large, complex sets of things to collect and tasks to do that aren't repetitive? [more inside]
posted by 100kb at 3:12 PM PST - 9 comments

Program(s) that backs up my iPod Classic and iPhone 7

I'm looking for a program that will backup my iPhone 7 and also my iPod Classic. One that will preserve my playlists on my iPod and also my notes, texts, pictures, etc from my iPhone. iMazing has said that can't do that, and iTunes is a crazy maze to navigate, but I am willing to try if that's my only option. If there are two separate programs that do this, I'm open to that as well. Thank you!
posted by Kombucha3452 at 3:06 PM PST - 2 comments

Rectocele surgery - how good or bad is it?

My GP has referred me to a surgeon to find out what can be done about my rectocele (and possibly cystocele). [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 3:04 PM PST - 1 comment

how to save/invest on someone else's behalf

I have just inherited around $150,000 and want to earmark this money for the care of an elderly relative. Assuming that I will be withdrawing around $500 a month for his general expenses (cell phone, internet, etc.), but want to have the ability to make larger withdrawals if other expenses come up (moving, medical/dental expenses not covered by medicare), what kind of bank/investment account should I put this in? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 3:03 PM PST - 9 comments

Help me identify this old beer!

In this photo, there is a can of beer. What is it? [more inside]
posted by witchen at 2:42 PM PST - 5 comments

Japanese translation requests

Can anyone translate for me a variety of inscriptions on Japanese prints, and one on the label of a carved Buddha? Any additional information about the prints and Buddha appreciated as well! Details within. [more inside]
posted by beagle at 1:40 PM PST - 3 comments

Should I Try to DTR? Or Live with Doubt, But in the Present?

I am 35 years old, and divorced now for a little over 2 years. I've done the rebound, lived to regret it, and taken a step back and evaluated myself. I've removed toxic people from my life, and gotten my shit straight (mostly). When I was least expecting it, I seem to have met someone with a bit more promise than the usual catch and release, and he seems to feel similarly about me. However... it has been a really long time since I have been here, and I've certainly never been here when I've had a healthy perspective on myself and relationships. [more inside]
posted by Quincy at 12:59 PM PST - 9 comments

Disappointed Millennial to Despairing Doomer

It's the Millennial from this question. Five years later, I've gone from disappointment to out-and-out despair. I'm not sure how to move forward. [more inside]
posted by MetaFilter World Peace at 12:01 PM PST - 25 comments

Cargo pants that don't look like cargo pants

It appears Dockers has discontinued my two favorite pants. Both were "cargo" pants, but not in a traditional sense where the cargo pockets were external and bulky -looking. Need a substitute. Details follow ... [more inside]
posted by jrchaplin at 11:53 AM PST - 10 comments

Help me find in NYC the "Abbey Road" 50th Anniversary edition on vinyl

For a friend's birthday tomorrow, I'm looking for a vinyl edition of the 50th Anniversary Abbey Road in Manhattan or Brooklyn preferably. Just the single record, not the deluxe set. I haven't had any luck (or much time) calling around to shops the past couple days. Has anyone seen it anywhere or know who might have it in stock? There's no time to have it shipped.
posted by theory at 11:45 AM PST - 2 comments

How to Introduce Someone to the Fab Four

How would you introduce a young adult to the Beatles? [more inside]
posted by Chuffy at 11:33 AM PST - 31 comments

Rooms to Go equivalent in Seattle

I've heard good things about Rooms to Go from people who live near one, but they don't exist near Seattle. What's the closest equivalent? [more inside]
posted by rouftop at 11:25 AM PST - 1 comment

What is the green thing reading

Not entirely sure if this is too broad of a question, but I've picked up some really good books that get mentioned here, like When things fall apart by Pema Chödrön and The gift of fear by Gavin de Becker that i probably wouldn't have come across them otherwise. what are books that you recommend or have seen recommended on the green that rock? I'm basically open to any genre. TIA!
posted by speakeasy at 10:14 AM PST - 13 comments

Is there a name for drumming riff, and what are other examples?

In the (awesome) Stand Atlantic song Roses, there's a quiet section, then two crashes, then the song picks up again (2:23, here). I feel like I've heard this a bunch in rock before. I'm wondering if this "telegraphing with cymbal crashes" of an upcoming tempo change has a name, and what are some other examples.
posted by Gorgik at 10:10 AM PST - 7 comments

Use it or lose it?

Is anyone familiar with a video game where the player's skills fade or diminish with disuse (ideally in a clear way)? We're working to teach my son about how practice maintains skills, even if it doesn't improve them. Since most games have a user reach a "level" and maintain skills at that point, he (and now I) wanted to know if there were any games where you can lose skills through disuse?
posted by TofuGolem at 9:46 AM PST - 8 comments

Any leads for dealing with Facebook lockout hell?

I'm caught in the Facebook Lockout paradox, with a software bug thrown in for good measure. PLEASE HELP ME OBI-WAN [more inside]
posted by dbiedny at 9:37 AM PST - 5 comments

Tests and conditions to consider for recurrent nausea/vomiting

My 60 year old mother is having nausea after almost every meal and 5-7 day bouts of vomiting every few months. She sees a new GI next week, but this hasn’t been taken seriously in the past. YANHD, but can you help me make a list of tests she should ask about and conditions they should try to rule out? [more inside]
posted by bananacabana at 9:05 AM PST - 10 comments

Dealing with nightmare coworker

How do you deal with a crappy, condescending male coworker? [more inside]
posted by marfa, texas at 9:00 AM PST - 9 comments

Rip an interactive DVD to create a playable video file not on DVD

My company owns an interactive DVD we use to teach safety protocols (videos show scenarios, then you're supposed to select the correct answer on a screen to move forward). We'd like to convert it to a playable video file that doesn't need the actual DVD to play. I opened it up with Handbrake and pulled out each video section, but (obviously) the interactive part is killed. How can I rip a copy-protected, interactive DVD and make a computer-playable video file that is also interactive? Software and more inside. [more inside]
posted by tzikeh at 8:37 AM PST - 10 comments

What's up with this HVAC setup?

We are looking at a house that is 100-ish years old. The ducting system is not one I'm familiar with and I'm wondering if it's going to be an issue or not. I've been looking online and I can't seem to find a name for it. [more inside]
posted by JimBJ9 at 7:58 AM PST - 5 comments

British pre-WWII girls' boarding schools: help me find book listing them

Many years ago I was stuck in a place with very little to read. There were two battered volumes, possibly from the 1930s, but very possibly older, that were sort of catalogs of British boarding schools for girls. I don't mean each was the catalog for an individual school. Each book compiled numerous entries for discrete and unrelated schools. Each entry listed characteristics of a school: there were pictures of buildings, lists of all the subjects they taught, lists of sports available, tuition, etc. Does anyone know what such volumes were called?
posted by mareli at 7:56 AM PST - 5 comments

what actually IS flirting

What is the difference between friendly conversation and flirting? Recently I was told that I am a flirt but I am not aware of being one or of going into conversations with the intention of flirting. What are some key hallmarks of flirting as opposed to regular friendly conversation? [more inside]
posted by unicorn chaser at 7:43 AM PST - 32 comments

Car insurance for a car you haven't bought yet?

Hello I am an adult. I am planning to buy a car from a dealership for the first time in my life (a used car.) I currently have zero cars. How do I legally drive the car home? Do I get insurance before I have the car? I don't know when I'm buying the car. So I need to pay for insurance for a car I don't have yet and may not have for a few weeks? I am confused, help me.
posted by Automocar at 6:50 AM PST - 11 comments

Struggling with a childcare option for a kid with special needs?

My three year old daughter has a speech delay (or perhaps disorder - too early to tell, it seems). I'm at a childcare crossroads and genuinely don't know what to do. Any thoughts? [more inside]
posted by caoimhe at 3:42 AM PST - 14 comments

Best freeware for PDFs

Has anyone sorted through the Adobe Acrobat-mimicking freeware (or "cheap-ware?") to figure out which is best? Here is literally all I want to do: highlight words; add comments; and insert, delete, and rearrange pages. Even any one of these would be super helpful. Is it possible to get this for less than $8-15/month in some way? I'm willing to pay some small one-time cost. Thanks for any recommendations!
posted by salvia at 12:14 AM PST - 13 comments

October 10

Give me the smarts

I have a need for brain focus tasks that I'm not getting just living my ho hum life. I look for downloads in Play Store that have brain teasers but all I see are variations of the same Majong and Find the Hidden item. [more inside]
posted by The_imp_inimpossible at 10:16 PM PST - 18 comments

How to save the planet - one protest song at a time

My friend has written a climate change protest song. It's beautifully simple and he's not ready to share the lyrics. I get to do the animation for the video, and rather than just showing what's going wrong, I want to show what we as individuals can do right beyond recycling and not over-consuming. You know, plant a tree, plant bee friendly things, take public transport... I have 3 minutes and 15 seconds.
posted by b33j at 9:55 PM PST - 13 comments

Black or white best with brown

I'm buying IKEA KALLAX shelving and the size that I want only comes in black & white. The room also has a large heavy teak-color bookshelf that has to stay. I don't think they will be sitting directly next to each other but I'm not sure either. There's going to be a lot of the Kallax shelving eventually. I know that none of this is going to be optimal but do you think the black or white Kallax would be the least ugly? [more inside]
posted by bleep at 2:24 PM PST - 9 comments

Paris filter: looking to spend NYE in Paris, with the locals

What it says on the tin. My friend and I have a [long] layover in Paris coinciding with NYE, and would like to spend it at a bar. Many of the previous recommendations on here are a few years old, so I'm wondering if there might be newer, more relevant suggestions. [more inside]
posted by Everydayville at 2:19 PM PST - 3 comments

What the FUCK progesterone?!

These drugs were supposed to stop my period. Which I just got. It's been well over a decade since my TCOYF days and I just realised I have no idea what's going on or why. [more inside]
posted by DarlingBri at 1:54 PM PST - 12 comments

What to do with a possibly abandoned bonus cat?

For the past year or so, we've been feeding a neighborhood cat, with the knowledge of the cat's owner. I'm pretty sure the owner has since moved and left the cat behind. I don't know what to do now. [more inside]
posted by Ruki at 12:46 PM PST - 15 comments

What is wrong with my computer/browser?

My Google searches (in Gmail and in browser) are autofilling with "team reviled". Running antivirus turns up nothing. Google fu is failing me. Help!
posted by obliquity of the ecliptic at 12:11 PM PST - 7 comments

Alternative Face Protection For Skiing

I wear a Seirus Combo Scarf for skiing, but I dislike the Hannibal Lecterness/ inability to easily slide it down off my face to have a conversation. All the alternatives I look at - e.g. balaclavas - don't have mouth/ nose ventilation, which are critical to prevent goggle steaming and breath dampness. What alternatives are there to my Lecter mask, or, how do folks wear balaclavas without steaming up their goggles?
posted by 7 Minutes of Madness at 11:36 AM PST - 8 comments

Give us your easiest, no-hassle sauce recipes

Looking for dead simple sauces I can make by stirring things together and then add to something that is already cooked/prepared. In other words, these sauces shouldn't require cooking, or much chopping, or hauling out appliances like the blender or the food processor. (Brief heating in the microwave is fine, as is chopping a small sprinkling of herbs or maybe pressing some garlic.) I want sauces I can put on something that is already cooked--not something I need to cook other things IN. So stirfry sauces are out. [more inside]
posted by CiaoMela at 11:21 AM PST - 49 comments

Dictionary or thesaurus which gives reading level of a word

I could swear that I saw this somewhere: you look up a word, and the reading level is provided next to it. Or the percentage of English speakers who know the word. Have I seen this, or do I just wish it existed? I've checked several sources and can't find it!
posted by onecircleaday at 10:25 AM PST - 7 comments

What is this thing? Copper cremation artifact identification help please

What is this thing? It came along with some cremated remains from 1935 (but was not holding said remains). [more inside]
posted by natabat at 9:25 AM PST - 6 comments

How do I pursue a PhD?

I can't find any real guidance or documentation online re: PhD application processes -- there are just a lot of think pieces about why you shouldn't pursue a PhD. So I guess my question is: when considering a PhD, where do you start; do I need to have everything mapped out before I begin applying + requesting letters, or do I email professors my request and figure it out as I go? [more inside]
posted by mrk021 at 9:11 AM PST - 29 comments

Float My Boat

The little boat I've made tips me out; how do I make a boat that doesn't? I want to be [more inside]
posted by anadem at 8:53 AM PST - 19 comments

Extremely short permadeath games?

I like reading the wikis and watching different ending videos of games like Until Dawn and Fire Emblems where the ending changes depending on who dies during your run. But these are long games, at least for me, and I'm not going to replay the whole thing to compare changes. Are there any very short games where permadeath has narrative consequences? [more inside]
posted by gaybobbie at 8:42 AM PST - 10 comments

Help for Newbie to Gym Etiquette

For my son's birthday this year, my one sister gifted us with a membership to a pool club near us that specializes in disabled kids and families. It's really nice - lap pool, wade in pool with splash pad, an area for water basketball, and a lazy river with a 10 person jacuzzi whirlpool in the middle. They also have a basketball court, an open gym, a gathering room, and a tiny gym. [more inside]
posted by 80 Cats in a Dog Suit at 7:37 AM PST - 27 comments

What should I expect from an iphone SE with 85% battery capacity?

I just bought a new-used iphone SE in generally good shape. The battery capacity/health indicator says 85% capacity and that it's at "peak performance capability," but it arrived totally drained, gets slightly warm during charging, and seems to drain quite quickly. Is this normal for a phone of this age/condition? [more inside]
posted by needs more cowbell at 6:18 AM PST - 30 comments

Coping with disability

Being disabled doesn't fit my internal narrative as a high achieving, fitness oriented person. I am in therapy and we are addressing this, but I wanted to hear from others that transitioned from able bodied to disabled physically to see how you made that process happen on a mental level. [more inside]
posted by crunchy potato at 6:12 AM PST - 15 comments

Software for a courier - a van tablet?

We have a delivery driver for our warehouse - it would be REALLY cool to have a tablet permanently mounted in the van to which we could send his list of jobs, and which he could use with Google Maps to route him from point to point. [more inside]
posted by dance at 6:07 AM PST - 4 comments

Travel mug that DOESN'T keep things megahot but still keeps a good seal?

I know this might be a contradiction in terms, but I would like a durable (not glass) travel mug, preferably 16oz, that won't leak but also allows me to drink my darn coffee a little more quickly. Does this exist? [more inside]
posted by wellred at 5:59 AM PST - 23 comments

How to use gmail correctly with multiple accounts?

I've been using Gmail with multiple accounts and aliases successfully for ages, but yesterday discovered that a number of my colleagues' emails were going direct to spam. So I whitelisted our organisation's email domain, and now every time I send an email as one of my aliases I get a copy of that email in my gmail inbox. How do I stop it? [more inside]
posted by lollusc at 2:30 AM PST - 2 comments

Party Hat construction help needed!

I need to make a party hat out of construction paper with very specific diameter and vertical length measurements. The instructions I have found online don't seem to allow one to perform such fine-tuning. The party hat I require should have a diameter of 7 1/2 in. (radius 3 3/4 in.) and a vertical length (or slant height) of 15 13/16 in. What's the best and/or easiest way of doing this and ensuring that the measurements are spot on?
posted by tenderly at 1:50 AM PST - 14 comments

October 9

Tablet, phonebook or kindle for academic pdfs?

I have 4-8 months of research work which involves reading a huge stack of PDFs, plus scanned pages. I have to go places and move around during the day and I would like a mobile option. I'm not worried about keyboards or annotating, I use a rocketbook for that. What should I get or do I just get used to hauling my laptop everywhere? [more inside]
posted by dorothyisunderwood at 10:56 PM PST - 15 comments

I don't like having my brains picked.

People often ask me for tips about how to break into my desirable freelance career. I help them, and then I feel bad after. Help talk me through this? [more inside]
posted by nouvelle-personne at 8:09 PM PST - 27 comments

Which are the best universities for CS in Canada?

I want to apply for a master in science in Canada. I intend to apply to the obvious choices like UBC, University of Toronto and University of Waterloo. I'm not sure about who else has a good program so I thought I would ask about this. On a side note, I don't really have any research experience. I meet all the other requirements for those universities. Is it a problem to have no research experience for a master in science that requires a thesis? Also, I'd be an international student.
posted by Tarsonis10 at 7:23 PM PST - 9 comments

Can I “fat wash” whiskey without a sous vide setup?

This cocktail recipe calls for a sesame oil fat washed whiskey. The fat-washing directions call for sous vide-ing, but I don’t have a sous vide setup. Can I achieve the same effect without the sous vide?
posted by hapticactionnetwork at 7:17 PM PST - 6 comments

In NYC, is it illegal to write on illegal signs?

New York City is awash in unlicensed illegal ads wheatpasted on construction sites, walls, everywhere. Is it illegal to write on the ads with a marker? [more inside]
posted by history is a weapon at 6:56 PM PST - 7 comments

Credit card company lowered credit limit

Would it help to pay it down to 30% or less (I'm considering the C/D ratio) if I have the money lying around? [more inside]
posted by intrepid_simpleton at 5:20 PM PST - 6 comments

silicone paste vs silicone grease vs silicone spray lube

What are the differences? What are the pros and cons ,and suited uses, of each? Hopefully someone here can sort this out for me. Also, where possible, can you please cite reputable sources for the info because I have seen many people claim personal knowledge that contradicts other people's personal knowledge. Such is the internet, I know. Thanks!
posted by atm at 4:26 PM PST - 8 comments

Baking Soda Chemistry: how much....

I want to use baking soda and vinegar to produce carbon dioxide bubbles. The grocery store vinegar is described as having 5% acidity (not how it would be described in chem class!). How much baking soda should I use for, say, 1 quart of vinegar? [more inside]
posted by SemiSalt at 3:18 PM PST - 14 comments

Google suggested articles - no politics?

I've been enjoying the feature an Android where I get suggestions for articles that might interest me. This pretty accurately guesses what is of interest to me, with one curious omission. I spend about an hour daily, during my commute, on politico, washingtonpost, cnn, huffingtonpost etc. and read tons of articles about Trump, congress, impeachment, the whole thing, but I never get any articles related to politics in my recommendations. What's up with that? [more inside]
posted by SweetLiesOfBokonon at 3:07 PM PST - 3 comments

Fun feminist songs

Hi there internet friends! I've really been craving some poppy, fun, feminist songs. Please share! [more inside]
posted by hotchocolate at 2:16 PM PST - 51 comments

Passive House Systems required in floodplains?

Are there any cities/communities requiring PHS in new buildings in floodplains to system to reduce carbon footprint?
posted by ebesan at 2:07 PM PST - 3 comments

How do I meet other parents in my age bracket (late 40s)?

One of the toughest things about getting divorced has been the loss of family friends who have kids roughly the same age as mine (7 & 10). How do I more or less start over, socially? [more inside]
posted by El Curioso at 12:00 PM PST - 13 comments

Every Photograph of Frederick Douglass

“The humblest servant girl may now possess a picture of herself such as the wealth of kings could not purchase 50 years ago" How do I find every photograph ever taken of Frederick Douglass?< [more inside]
posted by The Blue Olly at 11:41 AM PST - 2 comments

Wanted: this coat

My husband really, really likes this coat that Harry S Truman wore in Twin Peaks. (For non-TP fans, the guy on the right.) Do you know where I can find it, or one that's similar?
posted by rabbitrabbit at 11:20 AM PST - 10 comments

Is my cat evil?

This is meant only slightly as tongue in cheek. I have two cats: a larger male and smaller female. The female is the one I suspect of demonic possession. When the male cat has created a nest for himself somewhere, the female cat will notice and come over and start grooming him, then when he's fully woken up, she'll turn it into fighting and gradually escalate until male cat leaves and then female settles into nest and takes a nap. [more inside]
posted by Jon44 at 8:42 AM PST - 29 comments

Recommend me headphones for commuting! Wireless, with microphone

Please recommend me good headphones that I'll be using mainly to listen to spoken-word podcasts while commuting, and for phone calls when necessary. [more inside]
posted by snarfois at 7:30 AM PST - 14 comments

Looking for songs about letting the world go by, help me out.

My birthday is coming up next week, and I'd really like to create a playlist of songs about being fine with NOT trying to keep up. In the vein of John Lennon's Watching the Wheels. The wide and varied tastes of the Ask crowd would be super handy at adding some flavor to this endeavor.
posted by DigDoug at 6:02 AM PST - 53 comments

Is this a conflict of interest?

I work at a "large important institution". The Director of my group would like to bring in their spouse's new company to help us automate our workflows. The work would be free and according to the Director, the tools would work well. Would there be a perceived conflict of interest? More below the fold. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 4:49 AM PST - 13 comments

Looking for water-resistant, office-appropriate, no-heel women's boots

What the title says. What do women-presenting people wear in the office in the fall and winter when it's too cold for flats and they don't want a heel? I would like help finding a pair of dressy/office-appropriate black boots that are reasonably OK getting wet and have little to no heel. I've read over previous questions and unfortunately links are broken or the shoes aren't right. Boring is OK, even preferable, because I'll ideally only be wearing these. [more inside]
posted by schroedinger at 4:33 AM PST - 26 comments

October 8

Climbing back on a dead horse

I desperately need work. I'm fighting horrible depression, 18 months of unemployment, and a myriad of insecurities about my spotty work history before that. I need someone (in LA or online) who can listen to my background (see inside), rebuild my resume, and help me pick some short term career goals. How do find someone who can help me through this when I have no money? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 11:47 PM PST - 15 comments

Event check-in app that allows for repeat QR code/barcode scanning?

I'm running an expo that will have multiple vendors demonstrating their products. I plan to give all event attendees a unique QR code. I would like to find a mobile app that will: (1) allow me, as the event organizer, to check-in all attendees at the main door by scanning their QR code with a mobile app; and (2) allow each vendor to scan the QR codes of only the attendees who come to their table. Therefore, I'll have a master list of attendees, and each vendor will have a specific list of attendees who dropped by their table. This is the only functionality I need from the software. I see there's a ton of stuff out there, but most of it is overcomplicated for my purposes. Whatever software choice, it needs to be as simple as possible for the vendor to use. Help!
posted by dead_ at 9:15 PM PST - 5 comments

XPS-13 vs MAcbook Air 13" 2014

hi all, I'm debating whether to buy an XPS-13 2017 and a 2014/2015 MAcbook Air 13" I prefer to buy second-hand laptops so I can reduce my environmental impact. They both SAY that they have a long battery life, but how long are they really? For me, battery life is the biggest criteria, and I'm hoping to have a PC with a very long battery. I've found Macbooks to be fairly reliable and long-lived, and easy to get repaired if need-be. My last XPS got a tad wet and died. Really bad experience. It had amazing battery life though. If battery life is the only / main criteria, which computer will last longer, daily, really?
posted by earthwalker7 at 7:10 PM PST - 6 comments

flatbread with no/low marginal labor per serving, like a loaf of bread?

I like pita, roti, and bing, but they are more labor intensive to make. Some of them need to be cooked individually in a pan, and even the ones that can be baked en masse in an oven need to be rotated in and out because they don't pack as efficiently into the space. Contrast with, for example, a Pullman loaf, where I can throw a kilo of flour into my oven and walk away. Is there any way to get the best of both worlds? [more inside]
posted by meaty shoe puppet at 6:20 PM PST - 12 comments

Seeking recommendations for Windows laptop that runs Creative Cloud

I'm looking for a Windows laptop that can handle Adobe Creative Cloud (mostly Photoshop/Illustrator/InDesign/Acrobat right now). I've been reading through the system requirements pages for Illustrator and Photoshop, and I am getting lost in the graphics card requirements. None of the tested cards quite match what I am able to purchase in various machines. What should I be considering? [more inside]
posted by melissa at 2:51 PM PST - 7 comments

Snacks to bring for Korean dinner?

My neighbor has invited us to join his household for a Korean meal on Friday and has requested we bring “social snacks”; I suggested kimchi and was enthusiastically approved. What else should I bring? [more inside]
posted by mwhybark at 2:43 PM PST - 29 comments

Montreal with tweens between Christmas and New Year's Eve

Seeking advice about traveling to Montreal at the holidays. [more inside]
posted by trixie119 at 11:32 AM PST - 8 comments

Potable water at AMC huts that are closed for winter?

I'm planning to hike Mount Adams in the White Mountains this fall. I know the Madison Spring Hut is a great place to refill water bottles when it's open (May through September), but now that it's closed for winter - can you still get potable water there? (e.g., from a well pump outside the hut?) Thanks in advance!
posted by stuehler at 11:24 AM PST - 5 comments

Ashkenazi history

Why did so many Yiddish-speaking Ashkenazi Jews migrate from Central Europe to Eastern Europe in the 16th to 18th-ish centuries? [more inside]
posted by dusty potato at 11:15 AM PST - 10 comments

Is purchasing a used electric Smart car in the US an okay idea?

We are considering purchasing a used electric Smart car for city driving over the next three or so years, as a supplement to an existing reliable vehicle with good cargo capacity. What should we watch out for? For example, should we be worried that parts and/or service are going to become much more expensive going forward? And, if we're looking to spend about a maximum of $8000, is it correct that we'd rather have a newer Smart car than an older, higher-mileage Leaf (for example)? [more inside]
posted by teremala at 10:30 AM PST - 19 comments

Favorite achievable experiment videos (YouTube, etc)?

My son's current favorite thing to do is to watch "experiments" on Youtube, e.g., attempting to blow up a watermelon, make a lantern, etc. He wants to try experiments but most of these videos are "do not try this at home". I am aware of the classic baking soda/vinegar volcano. Are there any experiments, preferably video series (books acceptable), that would be achievable for young kids (7-8)? Non-Youtube video sources welcome!
posted by typecloud at 9:57 AM PST - 17 comments

Help me paint my shoes metallic gold for Halloween.

For my costume, I need shiny, metallic gold shoes. Looking to take a pair of used light brown office shoes (suede/leather combo) and turn them into sparkly gold shoes. What type of paint do I need to accomplish this affect? Should I be using a white sneaker shoe instead? This is the type of effect I"m looking for. But I'm open to dress shoe/sneaker/boot, whatever type of shoe material best accomplishes this look.
posted by caveatz at 8:59 AM PST - 14 comments

Am I wrong to consider this orthodontist's billing practice unethical?

My dentist referred me to an orthodontist for consultation. The orthodontist's office said by email, "since you were referred, we will waive the consult fee." In the intake process, they took my insurance info, and then hit my insurance for $100. They said the "waiving" was of the co-pay, which was another $100. [more inside]
posted by Borborygmus at 8:49 AM PST - 11 comments

2 factor auth doesn't mean much if I can bypass it

How do I force Google to ask for 2 factor authentication again on a known browser? [more inside]
posted by Tehhund at 8:47 AM PST - 9 comments

Help me remember this book?

I have vague memories of a book I read as a young teen, probably some time in the early 00s, but I can't find it on Google, going off of the few details I remember. [more inside]
posted by shanek at 8:18 AM PST - 7 comments

MacOS Calendar app that will use the event color coding of Google's?

I'm looking for a desktop app for MacOS that doesn't just do calendar color coding wholesale, but uses a color coding scheme that's parallel with Google Calendar's, so that my events are color-coded as they would be on calendar.google.com. This has been surprisingly hard to search for, and every app I've done the trial for doesn't work in this way. [more inside]
posted by baptismal at 8:14 AM PST - 6 comments

Kids books with any of these elements

I'm planning a new book for my son, but I feel like the story lacks something isn't quite hanging together. I'd like to read other similar genre story to get a sense of the tropes. Here are some elements. Please list other picture books that have similar elements. Obviously no book will have all elements, looking for books that have any, not all. 1) A magical quest 2) Driving a magical vehicle 3) Finding lost items 4) passing through different landscapes 5) possibly a guide character 6) meeting lots of different characters along the way. [more inside]
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 7:21 AM PST - 27 comments

I Love My Baby Cause She Does Good Sculptures - a dance party

Counterintuitively, the B-52s now featured on the blue have always seemed very autumnal to me. This suggests, somehow, a sort of autumnal dance party. Given the constraints below, what would you recommend? [more inside]
posted by Frowner at 7:09 AM PST - 22 comments

Foreign Exchange programs, not by the State or Capital

My daughter is very interested in doing a high school foreign exchange program, maybe for a semester or a year at some point. We are fine with that, but the programs we are finding - like Rotary, etc. - seem to push a "business leaders of the future / networking" line with state backing that we don't identify with. [more inside]
posted by RajahKing at 7:05 AM PST - 12 comments

HALP! ISO cheaper cartridges for a Brother HD-3170CDW laser printer

Cartridge numbers = TN221BK, TN221M, TN221C, TN221Y Brother online on Amazon and Staples online have the cartridges for $70 - 75 each. OIder Asks say that compatible cheaper cartridges vary in quality. Please recommend current reliable sources. Thanks (wanders off muttering that cost of set of replacement cartridges should not approach cost of new printer . . . )
posted by jointhedance at 6:54 AM PST - 9 comments

How do introverts handle manicures?

Can you take me through my imaginary social awkwardness of sitting there having someone do my nails? Skimmables for TL/DR in bold. [more inside]
posted by A Terrible Llama at 6:13 AM PST - 33 comments

Anyone have any success playing forum-based TTRPGS? Help me!

I've always been a fan of TTRPG games, but have always found it hard to get games to the table, as it were. Playing asynchronously appeals to me greatly, but I'm really struggling to find a good group. If you're someone who has succeeded at this, I'd love you advice! Snowflake details within! [more inside]
posted by wooh at 2:54 AM PST - 9 comments

How do I cope with my small business having an awful year?

I run a small business and, well... business has been bad this year. How do I manage this emotionally/logistically? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 12:19 AM PST - 6 comments

Does my employer know when I visit a doctor?

What it says on the tin, basically. This is a family company, I pay for PPO health insurance offered by the company with a major insurer. Does my boss and/or benefits manager know if I visit a doctor's office, in some sort of monthly claims statement or something? I have been fibbing about a medical issue. (Don't be me.)
posted by anonymous at 12:19 AM PST - 7 comments

October 7

Help me find my perfect online art class

I'm looking for an online art class that meets some particular specifications. Snowflakes within! [more inside]
posted by shadygrove at 8:05 PM PST - 10 comments

How can I spend down my HSA funds?

I have about $1K in my HSA fund and I need to use at least $500 of it by the end of the year. My family is generally healthy and we have pretty good insurance, so I haven't had to spend much on medical care. What else can I spend these funds on? I'd really like to not lose this money. It was tax-free, but still. Thanks!
posted by Fister Roboto at 7:27 PM PST - 22 comments

Looking for an Entertainment Accountant in San Diego or Orange County

I have sold words for money in the past and I intend to do so again. Meanwhile I started up and shut down a brewery and have a leftover S-Corp. I am looking for an accountant who knows what to do with these things. [more inside]
posted by Captain Shenanigan at 7:06 PM PST - 1 comment

Books like "The Worry Cure"?

I've found "The Worry Cure" by Robert Leahy to be super useful and effective. Are there other books that provide concrete ways of how to deal with worrying/anxieties? [more inside]
posted by ellerhodes at 7:00 PM PST - 4 comments

My hands are still burning 24 hours later

I’m an idiot and cut up about a pound of assorted hot peppers last night. My fingertips are still burning. What do I do? [more inside]
posted by elvissa at 6:13 PM PST - 22 comments

Help me not ruin my hiking vacation

Kinda freaking out about my upcoming hiking vacation where we will basically be going all over Blue Ridge National Park in NC for 10 days. I have been hiking for daytrips before but never in actual mountains and there was cellular service for emergency stuff....like totally the opposite of this place where the National Park Svc website says mostly no cellular service and seems to advise you GPS isnt even accurate for the area? There are few to no toilets and I have an inflammatory bowel disorder, and I have asthma so hopefully the mountain air isn’t too hard to breathe lol guess I’ll find out right? This trip was my husband’s idea and I feel like I am going to mess it all up with my shitty health or bad sense of direction. [more inside]
posted by marshmallow kitty at 5:46 PM PST - 24 comments

Estranged parent’s funeral

I haven’t seen my father for 10 years, he died last week. Family relationships are difficult. I don’t know what to do re attending his funeral. [more inside]
posted by ElasticParrot at 4:50 PM PST - 18 comments

Calling residents of Atlanta, Raleigh, Charlotte, and Philly

Tell me about all about your cities please! Ideal criteria of next city listed below. Also, when looking to relocate to these cities, how should I time applying to jobs? [more inside]
posted by buttonedup at 3:50 PM PST - 21 comments

But I got this shot last year!

Why are some vaccinations good for life and others need to be given every year or require periodic boosters? [more inside]
posted by Dansaman at 3:38 PM PST - 5 comments

Give me your savory / easy / efficient recipes, yearning to be baked.

Baking is a particularly effective daily therapy to me. What savory recipes might replace my love of baking desserts from packaged mixes? Think the red-packaged Betty Crocker brownie and cookie mixes that only require a few staple additional ingredients (eggs / oil / butter / water). Satisfying, customizable, cheap, un-fussy, requires only a few staples on hand. For reasons, I really need to cut down on sugar. Are there similarly easy (less than ~10 ingredients) and quick (less than ~15 minute prep time) savory recipes that I could be baking instead? [more inside]
posted by seemoorglass at 2:32 PM PST - 38 comments

What type of burn did I have?

I had a pretty nasty burn a few weeks ago from a brush with my motorcycle's tailpipe. It's healed now, but what degree was it? [more inside]
posted by invitapriore at 2:26 PM PST - 5 comments

Best programming toy for 8 year old?

My daughter is turning 8 soon. I'd love to get her a programming toy as she's expressed a lot of interest in coding. [more inside]
posted by smoke at 2:19 PM PST - 15 comments

Is there a compact way of saving an old Livejournal?

I had a LiveJournal for a long time. At some point I did the LJ Book thing which saves it as a pdf--a pretty big file. I'm wondering if there's a way to save those old entries just as text, something I could print out and shove in a box in a closet to read some day since LJ itself will probably go away (and is already sort of a disaster.) I think the file I had was hundreds of pages because it saved a lot of formatting stuff. Thanks for any pointers. I've googled, obviously, but didn't find anything useful.
posted by less of course at 1:48 PM PST - 7 comments

Good and concise blogs / news sites about (American) football?

I really enjoyed the answers to Admiral Haddock’s question about the Patriots / Giants game and would like to read more of this kind of thing regularly. [more inside]
posted by fabius at 1:45 PM PST - 5 comments

books books books

Looking for books (also open to movies or tv shows) that are set in boarding schools/residential college campuses/artist residencies. NOT interested in dude main characters. Other preferences below. [more inside]
posted by tan_coul at 1:45 PM PST - 36 comments

Best Helios/Jupiter/Vintage Lens for filming??

I'm looking for a lens to shoot video on my Sony A7ii and as much as I am actually interested in aberrations and imperfections (the 'character' of vintage lenses) the swirling bokeh that seems to be standard on the Helios 44-2 & Jupiter 9 (two of the most recommended lenses it seems) happens a little too much character for my tastes. Can anyone recommend a reasonably priced vintage lens (Helios, Jupter, otherwise) that doesn't feature this particular swirling bokeh??
posted by dr handsome at 1:31 PM PST - 2 comments

Where is the best vacation destination for riding a moped?

What is the best vacation destination for someone who likes to ride a moped as a way to explore? [more inside]
posted by critzer at 1:01 PM PST - 15 comments

Restoring gold edges on fine china

I inherited my grandmother's china and I just ordered some extra pieces to fill in holes in her collection. They arrived a little more worn than was disclosed - the gilt edges are worn off in places. Is that kind of damage fixable, and if so, who can I hire to do it?
posted by marfa, texas at 12:47 PM PST - 1 comment

Why do people think Roth IRA/401(k) accounts are so great?

Am I crazy to think that most of the articles that promote Roth IRA/401(k) accounts over the traditional alternative are wrong? [more inside]
posted by wnissen at 11:40 AM PST - 16 comments

Identify This Bug!

Here he is. A little under 1/2" long. Winged, but they all seemed to be walking. Hordes of them in my basement last night, with nary a trace of them this afternoon.
posted by Quisp Lover at 11:36 AM PST - 7 comments

What is this little desk fidget thing?

Help me identify this item I got from a mall in the 1980s or early '90s. [more inside]
posted by Flying Saucer at 11:20 AM PST - 5 comments

Advice on facing my finances

I am working on getting control of my finances (created a budget, paying down debt). There are so many apps and books out there, and it is very overwhelming! Where do you recommend that I start? I have heard of Dave Ramsey, Your Money or Your Life, and Rich Dad Poor Dad. Any recommendations for a good book/program to start with? Now that I have created a budget, I would like to track and record my expenses to see if I am on track with my budget. [more inside]
posted by TRUELOTUS at 10:47 AM PST - 15 comments

Help navigating insurance with a slightly smushed old(er) car

I was in a car accident and am working with insurance to repair my car. I haven't been through this process, and would love some help. Old(er) car edition. [more inside]
posted by geegollygosh at 10:38 AM PST - 3 comments

College of Wooster

Did you, or did anyone you know, attend the College of Wooster? [more inside]
posted by nantucket at 10:36 AM PST - 9 comments

Should I buy this car?

My partner and I have the opportunity to buy an old used car for cheap. Should we do it? More details inside. [more inside]
posted by hepta at 9:59 AM PST - 20 comments

How to have fun in Boise, ID this week!

My partner and I are heading out to Boise late tomorrow night (10/8) and we'll be staying though Friday (10/11) night. I'd love to hear people's opinions on the best hits - restaurants, hikes, downtown walks, art galleries, museums, coffee shops (ideally with WiFi), bike shops, anything else. Also, if you know of any great road bike rides, I'll gladly accept input on that as well, since I'll be traveling with my bike. We'll be staying downtown at the Modern Hotel.
posted by matt_od at 9:28 AM PST - 6 comments

How do I fire and replace my oncologist?

I know that theoretically I can change oncologists for any reason whatsoever, but the circumstances I'm in make it seem awkward and impossible. I could really use some help navigating this. [more inside]
posted by FencingGal at 9:05 AM PST - 18 comments

Hopeful, kind, non-snarky podcasts needed

Help me survive the next few days? A few hours ago I said goodbye to my 13 year old dog Pippin for the last time - he was euthanized today. One of my best coping mechanisms is listening to podcasts but I need some new extra-strength-soothing podcasts to help me through this time. [more inside]
posted by Zumbador at 8:23 AM PST - 48 comments

Entry-entry-entry-level spooky movies

What would you recommend for kids requesting spooky movies/shows that are fundamentally not scary, because the kids are very sensitive to conflict and violence? [more inside]
posted by medusa at 7:45 AM PST - 22 comments

I need a hardside suitcase with super-durable wheels.

I'm looking for a hardside suitcase that my cat won't make into secret bed in the back of the closet (the fate of my current suitcase), and that has wheels that could go through the apocalypse. I live near cobblestone streets, go on the subway, etc. Should be smallish.
posted by backwards compatible at 6:16 AM PST - 9 comments

Translate this, Kilroy (Greek? version), please?

Short story: student(s) drew this on my dry erase board over the weekend. What's it mean? I need to make sure it's not the kind of thing I should erase asap. Thanks!
posted by correcaminos at 6:12 AM PST - 4 comments

What creative projects can a person do with driftwood?

I have no artistic experience (painting, drawing, etc), a desire to gain some, and access to a practically unlimited supply of driftwood. What are my options for beginner-friendly projects? [more inside]
posted by ToddBurson at 5:56 AM PST - 13 comments

I want to change jobs but feel underqualified. What can I do?

I'm in a job that's comfortable, pays (just) enough but is deeply unfulfilling and is beginning to seriously depress me. I'm in my 30s now and starting to feel old and useless. Convince me I can still do something new? (I'm in the UK) [more inside]
posted by Chaffinch at 5:40 AM PST - 11 comments

The thing about Arsenal is they always try to walk it in

I, a nerd, am going to see the NE Patriots play the Giants this week. If there is a pro sport I DO enjoy, it’s football. But I haven’t watch a game since maybe 2007. I have no affinity for the Pats or Giants (go Eagles). Can you catch me up on this match up in advance of Thursday’s game? [more inside]
posted by Admiral Haddock at 4:36 AM PST - 15 comments

Is there a magic bag?

I'm going on a trip and I need a handbag. The one I use all the time is too big to carry around all day sightseeing and I only ever have one bag at a time (apart from an evening clutch and a hiking rucksack). Problem: I'm only taking a cabin bag, no hold luggage, and I need something that will go with everything I'm bringing because I don't really have room to bring one and pack one. Any ideas? [more inside]
posted by billiebee at 4:34 AM PST - 5 comments

Long-term effects of temporary starvation

After competing on Survivor, more than one contestant has said something like "My digestion was messed up for a year afterwards." The contestants generally claim this was not caused by a parasite. What is the mechanism by which two or more weeks of restricted caloric intake (and/or generally rough conditions) can cause a year of digestive problems? Is there something they could have done before or after the period of starvation to prevent this? [more inside]
posted by yankeefog at 3:51 AM PST - 13 comments

Nonviolent shows to binge watch during cancer treatment?

I have to have these weekly all day treatments for cancer -- basically hooked up to an IV for about 6 hours. I'd love some suggestions of non-violent but engrossing (and downloadable) shows to watch! [more inside]
posted by heavenknows at 3:10 AM PST - 36 comments

Positive stories about overcoming a career setback

I've just had a major career setback and am heartbroken. I'd like to hear stories, ranging from personal anecdotes to published works, about how people dealt with this failure and moved on. I don't want stories of people who had massive success afterwards- just regular people who managed to learn from the experience.
posted by daybeforetheday at 2:09 AM PST - 6 comments

My cat is no longer the center of my home

We have a cat that we adore. We also have a new baby (4 months old) that we frankly adore a lot more. All our attention is on the baby and the cat is pretty neglected. How will this shake out? [more inside]
posted by redlines at 1:53 AM PST - 17 comments

October 6

Cover phone camera

I used to put paper tape on my phone camera but it looks ugly and is annoying when I want easy camera access (tape gets dirty and needs to be replaced a lot). What low-profile solutions exist for covering the front and rear camera on my Pixel 3a phone? [more inside]
posted by k8lin at 9:32 PM PST - 6 comments

Too-soft mattress help

My wife and I pulled the trigger and bought a new mattress, but we think that it's maybe too soft. Anybody have experience with a too-soft mattress? How did you fix the situation? [more inside]
posted by zardoz at 8:26 PM PST - 13 comments

Help, I have one million prune plums

I have one million Italian prune plums. I spent the day baking five plum tortes, successfully using up .001% of them. I don't want to just freeze them because I know from sad experience that I suck and will never use them that way. Also, I'm tired and don't have much free time. Ideas?
posted by HotToddy at 7:53 PM PST - 20 comments

What kind of lubricant for an electric motor in a kitchen extractor fan?

We recently had our kitchen extractor fail after a lot of screeching. One fan motor got either burnt out or got stuck; it would not run at all, so we replaced it. Then the other fan motor started making the same noises. We lubed it with some oil we had, but now the lubrication is wearing off and this motor is starting to make screechy noises again. What can we use to lubricate the axle so it stays lubricated? Would we need to clean it first?
posted by kandinski at 7:46 PM PST - 6 comments

Add your 2 cents to help coin a phrase

I want a term that refers to a lineage of sorts, for holding a perspective or values or philosophy that one learned from someone(s) not necessarily known in person. I've heard the phrase "intellectual ancestor(s)" which doesn't strike quite the right tone for me. [more inside]
posted by dancing leaves at 7:41 PM PST - 14 comments

What's the deal with Hawaii?

I am using FB to boost posts. I created a list that targets fifty separate recipients. They have similar preferences. But about 92% of all responses seem to always come to only one of them. That shouldn't happen and I don't know why. [more inside]
posted by CollectiveMind at 7:33 PM PST - 2 comments

Tell-tale signs of a good (or bad) dry cleaner

We had the best dry cleaner ever in San Diego, and would like to find one just as good having just moved to northern Virginia. Not so much interested in specific dry cleaning shops per se, but in anything the hive has noticed in the way of sizing up a dry cleaner's quality at first glance, or after a round or two of actually cleaning some clothing. Thanks!
posted by BadgerDoctor at 7:09 PM PST - 4 comments

Portable booster seat for kids under 40 pounds

I am looking for a travel booster seat for my daughter, who is 4 years old and 40" tall, but is still only 35 pounds. Ideally it would be something that could be carried around comfortably for a whole day of walking. (US, California) [more inside]
posted by insoluble uncertainty at 6:20 PM PST - 9 comments

Blazer for short trans man

I’m a short (5’2”) and proportionately small (32” chest) trans guy looking for a blazer for a couple of upcoming formal events. Tips? [more inside]
posted by thesmallmachine at 5:51 PM PST - 8 comments

Recovering from Heart Attack & changing habits -- when already depressed

I’m looking for recommendations on resources for someone (youngish) recovering from a heart attack. Books, blogs, videos, podcasts... whatever. NOT looking for cookbooks. I need resources that can help me think through some big mental roadblocks, and get through to some better practices for living. [more inside]
posted by armoir from antproof case at 5:30 PM PST - 10 comments

Replacing a Macbook Pro keyboard in NYC, y/n?

I have a mid-2014 MacBook Pro. I like my mid-2014 MBP. It can basically handle all the tasks I ask it to, though there is an occasional glitch and it can certainly run hot. In the happy universe, I'd be waiting another year or two to replace it. However...one of my Command keys and my 'i' key have stopped working, and it's a huge pain--I've remapped a couple keys to keep it usable in the short term, but that's not a long-term solution. [more inside]
posted by praemunire at 4:33 PM PST - 6 comments

How to help a depressed friend?

Hi. I have a dear friend that has been feeling quite down in the dumps which seems to have exacerbated the past few months. I am not exactly sure how to help, since I would like to help. I mentioned that he could possibly see a therapist or perhaps talk to his doctor -- but he is silent and did really make an effort to do that. [more inside]
posted by RearWindow at 4:01 PM PST - 5 comments

An Edible Curse

My flatmate and I are having a Halloween party built around the theme, or more precisely the general Mood of 'cursed images'. One of my responsibilities is devising a menu. Items don't need to have anything to do with any particular 'cursed image' - it's more that they need to have a generally unsettling feel, a certain Wrongness, while still ultimately being tolerable-to-pleasant to eat. All the food I prepare will be vegan. There need to be plenty of savoury options.
posted by Acheman at 3:18 PM PST - 27 comments

How make LG V30+ photo settings completely natural

I have an LG V30+ which seems to have a photo effect where faces looked blurred in photos (i think it's supposed to be flattering/wrinkle smoothing?) I don't like it ans just want to take "as-is" photos. [more inside]
posted by bearette at 2:31 PM PST - 3 comments

Credit card chip not working, can places still scan (US)?

My chip is not working so I can’t take out cash anywhere. Until I get a replacement (or really until banks open tomorrow), I’ve noticed that places that chip first (doesn’t work) then scan get declined. Places that do scan and don’t chip work fine. I called up Chase and they said it was not declined on their end and the POS system declined it. What’s going on? [more inside]
posted by geoff. at 2:25 PM PST - 10 comments

Managing life with a temporary disability

Three weeks ago my Achilles’ tendon spontaneously ruptured, and now my leg is temporarily disabled. Neither my apartment nor my company’s office are ADA compliant and my bosses already violated ADA laws by disclosing confidential information to my coworkers. I’m looking for advice on how to handle my employment, living situation, and my general lifestyle for the time-being. Detailed account inside. [more inside]
posted by omgkinky at 12:27 PM PST - 18 comments

How much should I spend on a mattress?

Looking round the shops this weekend prices seem to go from £400 (500 USD, 450 EUR) to £2000+. How much is it actually worth spending? Is a £1000 mattress twice as good as a £500 one? What is the "cut-off" point at which diminishing returns kick in? It was repeatedly pointed out to me that "you spend ⅓ of you life in bed", but does that really mean I need to spend £1200 on a mattress? [more inside]
posted by alby at 9:32 AM PST - 15 comments

Olafur Eliasson's time-stretching mirror

I just watched the Olafur Eliasson episode of Abstract on Netflix. At 21:00 he's standing in front of a mirror that appears to delay time, and it makes NO SENSE. [more inside]
posted by jonathanhughes at 8:59 AM PST - 7 comments

the meaning of life at the molecular level

What are your favorite books that blend science and spirituality/theory to understand topics like consciousness, abiogenesis, and quorum sensing? [more inside]
posted by xarnop at 8:54 AM PST - 10 comments

cat-proofing (ha) an upholstered bench

I have a very nice piano bench which I use daily. Our cats also use it daily and have done an impressive job of ripping apart the upholstery. I'm getting it reupholstered, understanding that nothing will be impervious to cat claws what are my longest lasting best looking material options? Suede? Rawhide? Microfiber? [more inside]
posted by arnicae at 8:39 AM PST - 11 comments

No-Fail Fall Albums

It’s finally fall, you have the windows open to the sunny, chilly breeze, you can hear the fallen leaves scattering along the street, and along with your morning coffee and maybe an apple cider donut, you think “I know the perfect album for this time of year: it’s ___________!” [more inside]
posted by sallybrown at 8:32 AM PST - 49 comments

How can I put this survey online without programming?

Wired published this autism survey a long time ago, and I want to recreate it in an online form. Is there a web service that would work for this? Or perhaps a way to do this in Google Forms? The test/survey assigns different point values to each question.
posted by mecran01 at 8:20 AM PST - 1 comment

Ow, it hurts to sleep!

I have been having trouble finding a comfortable sleeping position. I keep waking up after taking a nap and after sleeping all night with a sore body, specifically with my neck, back and torso usually hurting. I have neck issues and fibromyalgia. I'm a side sleeper. I have a memory foam mattress that I've had for about six months. It hasn't given me any problems. Until a few weeks ago, I was okay using a buckwheat neck pillow on top of a flat pillow, but then I started getting body pain if I slept like that.Does anyone have ideas of things I can try to sleep better - like positioning of pillows and things like that? [more inside]
posted by starlybri at 6:55 AM PST - 11 comments

Tips for weaning my kid off thumbsucking for emotional regulation?

My son is turning five, and sucks his thumb when he is really stressed and upset as a way of regaining control of his emotions and calming down. We're trying to get him to break the habit; what are good alternatives to thumb sucking that he could use to regulate his emotions? [more inside]
posted by destrius at 6:44 AM PST - 34 comments

Android allow specific notifications on Do Not Disturb

I recently updated to Android 10, and my alarm app (Timely) is no longer considered an alarm for the purposes of muting my phone while Do Not Disturb is on. I would like notifications from this app, and only this app, to be allowed. I do not want to use the built-in google alarm. How do I do it?
posted by jeather at 6:39 AM PST - 3 comments

How do I make foods sticky for my dog?

This good girl was just diagnosed with dilated cardiomyopathy and congestive heart failure. Her prescription and supplement regimen is 16 pills a day. She is extremely picky and extremely smart, so this has been challenging. Many popular pill hiding options have failed because even if they’re high value treats, she can eat around the medication. We have a week to go before we see the specialist and learn more about compounding options, so I’m looking for ways I can make some homemade tasty treats that cling to the pills the way cream cheese or peanut butter does. Difficulty: she hates peanut butter.
posted by ferociouskitty at 6:22 AM PST - 27 comments

Firefox and bad font rendering under Windows 7

Why do certain fonts on certain websites look like utter trash under Firefox, and how can I fix it? [more inside]
posted by Rhomboid at 6:21 AM PST - 2 comments

October 5

My Heart Needs to Feel some Sax

Not looking for jazz or solos but more of something where the sax is the voice or the song. Tenor. Suggestions?
posted by iamhere:youarethere at 11:17 PM PST - 17 comments

Leaving Google

I want to move out of the Googleverse. To do so, I need three things, all of which need to work on (and sync seamlessly with) both my Android Phone and my Win10 desktop: * An email client (I have my own domains through Dreamhost) AND * A solution for managing my contacts (close to 1000) that works with the email client above AND * A calendar that works with both of the previous items. I am happy to pay for these solutions. In fact, I'd prefer to do so - I hate advertising. I already have an Office 365 account, if that matters.
posted by The Blue Olly at 8:45 PM PST - 10 comments

Board games without hand-held cards or dice

A group of us (ranging between 4-8 people) have started having a regular, casual, drop-in board game session some Fridays after work. I’m looking for games which can be played without holding cards, or rolling dice— there are some fine motor skill restrictions which rules out games like Exploding Kittens or Sushi Go. We’ve had fun with Code Names, and I’d like to mix it up with more in that space. [more inside]
posted by roshy at 8:19 PM PST - 24 comments

Best book on Pacific NW gardening

If I want to purchase the best, most comprehensive book on gardening in the Pacific Northwest, what should it be? [more inside]
posted by skycrashesdown at 7:21 PM PST - 11 comments

Help explain this Spike Jones joke about Lloyd Bridges!

In the Spike Jones spoken word radio play/ comedy song "Ah 1 Ah 2 Sunset strip" there's a bit around 3:00 where the beatnik valet crashes the protagonist's car (it winds up in the water) and he says "Well [unintelligible to me} can always sell it to Lloyd Bridges." What does this joke refer to? I'm guessing it's probably a reference to some sort of pop culture ephemera which I'm too young to get.
posted by Larry David Syndrome at 6:21 PM PST - 6 comments

Fashion without the fast part.

I would like to sell some t-shirt designs through an on-demand service of some kind, but I'd also like to be able to sleep at night. If I want my work printed on t-shirts that won't dissolve in a month made of material that isn’t sourced from somebody who dumps their trash in the ocean or works meth-addled children through 17 hour days, and I would like everyone involved to be making something approximating a living wage, what are my options?
posted by mhoye at 6:18 PM PST - 1 comment

Guilt and regret over the death of my dog

My old dog "Cassie" died of what was probably a heart attack this January. I am still very affected by her death. It's sometimes hard to enjoy time with my other dog, "Rex" (who we adopted years ago) because I worry about how he will eventually die too. I feel like I let Cassie down when I think of her. What do I do? Details ahead. [more inside]
posted by Chuck Barris at 6:07 PM PST - 13 comments

TWS i15 fake airpods not working!

I fell for one of those Facebook ads and bought some of the above fake airpods. They randomly turn off and on, beep, and summon Siri when I'm trying to listen to audio. Is there something I can do to reset them?
posted by Mistress at 5:44 PM PST - 2 comments

Looking for a algorithm to optimize game convention table allocations

Given several rooms of varying sizes with rows of tables of varying lengths, I'm trying to programmatically solve the problem of optimally allocating tables to events. This seems like a variation on the bin packing problem, but I want to keep all "boxes" of same event contiguously grouped. [more inside]
posted by Kolath at 4:30 PM PST - 6 comments

How do I light myself well for webcam?

I work from home, and I'm trying to get a better lighting setup for when I have video calls. This is part of an initiative at work to generally have employees with home offices up their A/V game, as it were, so they're present in video conferences closer to how people in the office conference rooms are. (snowflake details inside) [more inside]
posted by cardioid at 3:56 PM PST - 8 comments

Emergency-accessible secrets for the digital paranoid

I don't trust cloud services but I want someone trustworthy to be able to access my accounts in case of emergency. What services, products, or setups can make this happen? Also, as a matter of pure security-theory, what is the best possible way to do so with minimal trust? [more inside]
posted by jackbishop at 2:04 PM PST - 13 comments

Where do teenage girls find other girls for dating and mayhem?

(Asking with enthusiastic permission from the teen in question) How do I, the mom of a teenage probably-lesbian, help her find girls when there aren’t a lot of gay girls at her high school outside of her friend group, which she doesn’t want to date in? [more inside]
posted by corb at 12:52 PM PST - 13 comments

Where to visit in Jardines del Pedregal?

Can anyone recommend specific address/streets/intersections to visit in Jardines del Pedregal (México City)?
posted by andoatnp at 12:40 PM PST - 2 comments

I have no idea what my next career move should be

Ever since graduating from university in 2010, I feel like I've spent the last 9 years making nothing but stupid career decisions. I've been working in libraries for the past 6 years and, regretfully, finished an MLIS in April. I honestly should have heeded to all the "don't do it!!!" advice, but I went on and thought this decision made sense. I'm seriously regretting wasting my time and money on getting an MLIS, but now I have no idea what to do. I hate myself so much for doing this. Where do I go from here? [more inside]
posted by VirginiaPlain at 12:14 PM PST - 11 comments

Source for QAnon theory history and development?

I know a decent amount about QAnon and its basic theories. I'd like to know more - specifically, how their theories and ideas evolve over time. Are there good succinct sources for this out there? [more inside]
posted by Mechitar at 12:13 PM PST - 7 comments

Spooky non-spooky songs

I’m looking for individual songs that are tied to horror movies, such as Jump in The Line and Day-O from Beetlejuice or Goodbye Horses from Silence Of The Lambs. I am not looking for songs specifically written for movies (Ghostbusters theme), instrumental scores, or movies where the entire soundtrack could be used (The Lost Boys or Rocky Horror).
posted by Diskeater at 12:08 PM PST - 29 comments

Where is some contemporary Jazz & Classical music?

Looking for Jazz and Classical music late 20th and 21st century works (e.g. Reich, Glass, Riley) What has been done? Movements? Trends (e.g. Minimalism) Who?
posted by ebesan at 11:20 AM PST - 8 comments

Help me identify a tune in a youtube video.

Trying to figure out where the background music in this video came from: https://youtu.be/7IM6EupZZLY?t=730 Starts at 12:10 [more inside]
posted by iamabot at 10:47 AM PST - 5 comments

Occasional nausea during weight lifting?

I've been an on and off weight lifter for the past three years or so. As in, I go to my local Y and use their weight machines to build some muscle and stay active. But randomly I get nauseous enough that I need to stop my workout and I want to figure out why. [more inside]
posted by Twicketface at 10:35 AM PST - 14 comments

Good Alzheimer's online resources?

Someone very close to me has been diagnosed with early Alzheimer's. I am having trouble navigating the internet looking for useful info because it's very draining to read all the random stuff that crops up. [more inside]
posted by haemanu at 8:37 AM PST - 6 comments

What is this cord in my jewelry box

I bought this Pottery Barn McKenna jewelry box at a ridiculously discounted price due to some minor damage. I don't think there are any parts missing, but I can't figure out what this cord is for. [more inside]
posted by KleenexMakesaVeryGoodHat at 8:00 AM PST - 5 comments

How best to cook *wild* salmon fillets?

I have about 11 pounds of wild sockeye salmon in my freezer. This is sashimi-grade fish that has been vacuum-sealed into 7-8oz skin-on fillets. Because it's wild (and/or maybe because it's sockeye? and/or maybe because the portions are so small?), it's much denser and less fatty than the salmon I'm used to cooking. [more inside]
posted by unknowncommand at 7:36 AM PST - 12 comments

Advice for a non-traditional wedding reception

We're throwing a casual, friends-only wedding reception next month. How do we fill the time traditionally filled by dancing/DJ? [more inside]
posted by coffeeinanIV at 6:59 AM PST - 17 comments

Tired of being fatigued all the time

I've been feeling fatigued for the past two months. Not sleepy or lethargic, just physically heavy or "droopy"--like I'm wearing a lead suit and I just really really want to go lie down. It seems to get worse after moderate physical activity (or significantly worse after strenuous activity), until I've had a nap or been back to bed. I'm less tired after I've rested. I've been to the doctor but they haven't figured anything out yet. I'm hoping the internet might have some good suggestions for things to talk about with them or try before my next appointment. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 12:41 AM PST - 24 comments

October 4

(How) should I try to rehab a bad kisser?

I had a first date yesterday. Dinner conversation was good, kisses afterwards were double plus ungood. Halp?! [more inside]
posted by nirblegee at 11:23 PM PST - 22 comments

External hard drive for iMac Time Machine

I think I need to replace my 2TB Verbatim external hard drive, which I use exclusively for Time Machine backups on my iMac (Retina 5K, 27-inch, 2017) running MacOS Mojave 10.14. [more inside]
posted by Joleta at 10:46 PM PST - 6 comments

Cozy, satisfying historical fiction for Fall

As Fall begins in the Northern Hemisphere, I am hoping to curl up with some historical fiction that could be described as cozy. For example, scenes in firelit rooms while it rains outside; passing long, chilly nights; comfy interiors; hearty meals. [more inside]
posted by delight at 4:58 PM PST - 30 comments

Breaking news to unsupportive parents - halp.

We have some big (very good!) news we need to break to my in-laws. I like to think it comes from a place of love, concern, and their own life experiences...but their response is likely going to be very very negative. I'm looking for practical tips for 1) drafting the email with the news and 2) handling the inevitable hysterical phone call that will follow. [more inside]
posted by jrobin276 at 4:58 PM PST - 26 comments

How to rid myself of salty cravings?

I've been doing a super healthy clean eating plan for 8 weeks. I'm amazed at how easily my body adjusted to portion control, no processed food, no sugar outside of fruit, no additional salt, mostly plant-based choices, some fish and only a little chicken, whole grains, etc. I feel great and was incredulous at how quickly my legendarily massive sweet tooth seems to have completely disappeared. But I am still absolutely craving salty goodness. What gives? [more inside]
posted by BlahLaLa at 3:55 PM PST - 26 comments

Managing Instagram Followers

I would like to manage my Instagram followers; unfollow some accounts who are not following me, who appear to be bots, etc. There are apps on the market that will do this, but I am wary of giving them my account access, which presumably they need to run their analytics. Are there any apps out there (paid is fine) that are trustworthy? It appears a number of the top ones inflate “you are being blocked” numbers, which may indicate other unethical behaviors.
posted by Atrahasis at 3:40 PM PST - 1 comment

Things to do in Jefferson Park IL this weekend

I have to be in Jefferson Park this weekend. What is there to do there or very close by? Going into Chicago is too far and that's my normal go-to when in Illinois anyway. An excellent restaurant recommendation is fine but I can't eat all the time. Open to anything but no late night events (8pm or earlier). [more inside]
posted by jojo and the benjamins at 3:10 PM PST - 5 comments

Hairstyles to cover stitches on hairline?

I have a few stitches on my hairline, right in the center. I have to keep them covered in Vaseline for the next two weeks. It's not cute. Already looking into hats and stretchy headbands. Need advice on hair styles (feminine) for long hair. [more inside]
posted by meemzi at 2:21 PM PST - 9 comments

Liquid medication for cats

How have you successfully administered your cat's liquid medication? I've had little success and I'm running out of other ideas! [more inside]
posted by switcheroo at 2:19 PM PST - 20 comments

yet another "what laptop to buy" question

I need to replace a Samsung Series 9 ultrabook from (cough) 2013. Which brand? Used? Refurb? Try to wait until Cyber Monday? [more inside]
posted by mkuhnell at 1:55 PM PST - 6 comments

Recommendations for a mouse for MacBook Pro?

I'm learning to work in 3D graphics software, and my current mouse requires a lot of pressure for the middle click, which I am using constantly. The wire is a bit cumbersome, as well, but I can live with that. Can you recommend a solid mouse that requires only a light click pressure? [more inside]
posted by moira at 1:18 PM PST - 6 comments

Sexy-time underwear that isn't lacy (for ladies that like ladies)?

My wife is out of town for the next few days and I'd like to surprise her when she gets back with me in some sexy underwear. She's worn some lacy lingerie in the past and it was wonderful for the both of us, but lace is definitely not my thing (as in the idea of me wearing lace gives me panic). [more inside]
posted by carnivoregiraffe at 12:58 PM PST - 11 comments

First-time listener, pero en español

Looking for podcasts or broadcasts similar to NPR/WAMU's 1A or WNYC's Brian Lehrer Show, but in Spanish. [more inside]
posted by thecaddy at 12:12 PM PST - 2 comments

Piedaptation

This tomato pie is delicious and relatively simple to make, but my tomato plants won’t stop fruiting. My favorite pizza place makes a spicy lamb meatball and kale pizza, which may be my benchmark pizza. I would like to make a variation of the pie that riffs on the pizza. What should I do? [more inside]
posted by Maecenas at 12:07 PM PST - 3 comments

Parents want to leave bulk (all?) to my brother, in their will

My parents seem to be considering leaving most of their assets and money to my brother (the favourite) in their will, cutting me and my sister out. They seem to be using this to threaten her if she doesn't visit/care for them enough. I'm prepared for this but my sister wants advice on how to handle it/what to do? [more inside]
posted by abbagoochie at 11:39 AM PST - 25 comments

Driving to Big Bear Lake at New Year in a Prius

Assuming the normal range of conditions, can you drive from Los Angeles to Big Bear Lake around New Year in a regular city vehicle like a Prius? What's the likelihood you'd need to use chains? What are the chances the conditions will make it unwise or impossible?
posted by caek at 10:57 AM PST - 10 comments

Does this exist? A video explainer comparing image and sound processing

What I would love to watch is a video that compares all the various image editing techniques and concepts (which as a designer I’m familiar with) with their equivalents in sound editing (which I’m not). I’ve wanted this for years – surely something like this exists? [more inside]
posted by snarfois at 10:34 AM PST - 11 comments

PMS and nocturnal panic attacks.

I'm 39 and, as per a doctor, moving into peri-menopause. The last few days of my cycle, I'm getting pretty terrible middle-of-the-night panic attacks. Any advice on how to cope with this? [more inside]
posted by leftover_scrabble_rack at 10:01 AM PST - 13 comments

What raptor is this? Help me id the bird

On my way into work today I saw this bird chilling on a fence in the train parking lot. I'd love to know what it is. Location is the Bay Area peninsula.
posted by Carillon at 8:58 AM PST - 12 comments

Tips on cleaning/painting before moving into a prewar apartment?

I just moved into a great apartment in a wonderful location! It’s a classic prewar NYC apartment, and slightly dirty-looking-but-not-necessarily-dirty. Can I do something creative about it? [more inside]
posted by many more sunsets at 8:47 AM PST - 14 comments

1 Night in Kissimeee/Orlando with a kid. Affordable/Fun Activities?

Myself, my husband and our 8 year old son will be in the Kissimmee/Orlando area for the Midevil Times show on a Friday night. We want to make the most of the trip. Any suggestions? [more inside]
posted by Sara_NOT_Sarah at 8:23 AM PST - 4 comments

What types of insurance are "industry standard" for sole proprietors?

I'm a sole proprietor (writer/editor), and I've got a client asking me to sign a contract stipulating that I carry insurance "at least to industry standard." What types of insurance would be considered "industry standard" for a writer/editor with no employees? [more inside]
posted by MelanieMichelle at 8:10 AM PST - 8 comments

short on shirts

I'm looking for help tracking down some new tops to fill out my work wardrobe. Details inside! [more inside]
posted by brilliantine at 7:52 AM PST - 7 comments

How can I develop my career in fiction without going crazy or broke?

Can you help me make the best next step from burnt out freelance writer to balanced day jobber/novelist? [more inside]
posted by foxmardou at 7:21 AM PST - 6 comments

How do you approach professional development?

You take professional development and leadership development seriously: you understand how you need to develop yourself so you advance in your careers, you have goals, and you reach them. Explain it like I am five: how do you do this, what is your process, and what are your tools? [more inside]
posted by teragram at 6:53 AM PST - 9 comments

Why did I want to go to Le Havre?

A few years ago I must have seen something on Le Havre France and wrote it down on my big bucket list of places to visit before I die. Now I'm down to some of my last few places. And for the life of me I can't figure out why I put it down. Is there anything amazing there?
posted by rileyray3000 at 3:59 AM PST - 12 comments

What to do about permit issues from before I bought my house?

Homeowner nightmare - what should I do about very extensive roof work done without a permit from before I bought my house, in 2007? [more inside]
posted by amicamentis at 2:00 AM PST - 12 comments

October 3

Where should we lunch between Houston and New Orleans?

We’ll be driving out of Houston about 8 or 9 am on a Saturday morning, mostly driving along highway 90, getting to New Orleans maybe 4:00, allowing for a few brief stops plus lunch. Should we just eat a boring burger at a fast food place along the way? Or is there some place with good food that is not way far away from the highway, not excruciatingly slow, and clean? [more inside]
posted by chromium at 10:30 PM PST - 6 comments

Time to get out the winter pants!

You guys helped me pick out some great women’s pants for summer - thank you! Now that’s it’s cooling off, can you help me find equally awesome pants for winter? Requirements inside! [more inside]
posted by bananacabana at 9:21 PM PST - 4 comments

Feeling Jung today?

For a book proposal, I need to illustrate (preferably quantitatively) that people are still interested in Jungian psychology and related therapies (including narrative therapy). [more inside]
posted by mermaidcafe at 8:31 PM PST - 9 comments

"Neutronyms" for words referring to the past or future

I recently needed a word that is like "retrospect" but for the present instead of the past. [more inside]
posted by jjray at 8:30 PM PST - 26 comments

Recommend me a writing coach?

I've been working on a new book for, at this point, almost a year. I still haven't quite found the right groove (though I get closer and closer), and I keep revising the same 25,000 words over and over. It has been a hell of a year, personally, but I still need to finish this book ASAP, and for the first time I don't know what I need to do that. It's freaking me out. Hivemind, please help: can you recommend anyone who might be able to help me with this?
posted by schadenfrau at 6:54 PM PST - 5 comments

Roth vs traditional IRA

Today I saw a financial consultant (a free one, provided by Major Institutional Retirement Plan). I told him that I make $15K more per year than I'll need (or likely have) to live on in retirement, and he went on to advise me to put the extra in a Roth IRA. I was like, wait, why would I do that? And got a handwavy answer. But I'm right, right? In my situation I want a traditional IRA?
posted by HotToddy at 6:52 PM PST - 12 comments

What am I concerned about?

I obtained a button (pin, badge) that reads “I’m Concerned.” I’m wrestling with The Google to find out what it means. I’ve only found a link to it for sale (sold actually) on Etsy . I imagine it’s from some campaign about a specific concern, and while I have *many* concerns, I wouldn’t wear it if whatever the concern is isn’t one of my concerns.
posted by OrangeVelour at 6:23 PM PST - 13 comments

A sewing machine of my own

As a teen and into adulthood, I sewed a little bit; hemmed pants, repaired split seams, whipped out an occasional curtain or table runner. Clearly, I didn’t love it because I haven’t touched a sewing machine in about a decade. But I also dislike shopping and if a bit of sewing can save me from that horror and prolong the use of clothing that needs a little TLC, then game on. [more inside]
posted by dancing leaves at 4:41 PM PST - 22 comments

How do I print on SRA2 paper?

I designed a dust jacket and I bought some SRA2-sized Munken paper to print it on, thinking that I could just take it to my local print shop. I do this all the time with A3 and A4 paper, but they told me that they couldn't print at larger formats on provided paper because they use a plotter printer which prints on rolls. I tried printing it on their paper and it looks like crap. Is there a way to print on my beautiful SRA2 paper?
posted by Chenko at 4:05 PM PST - 3 comments

Where did I learn these Chinese characters?

When I was a young hanov3r, I found a book that was intended to, in a humorous fashion, teach mnemonics to remember a bunch of Chinese (or, MAYBE, Japanese?) characters. I can identify the characters for the numbers 1 through 6 and 10 because of the descriptions, along with the characters for 'man' and 'woman', but that's about it. I want to find this book again. [more inside]
posted by hanov3r at 3:56 PM PST - 5 comments

Is there any way to knit this poncho without a pattern?

I'm in the mood to knit and I've decided on a poncho. I haven't knitted in a while, and have mostly knitted scarves, but a couple of sweaters way back when. I've spent a couple of hours hunting for patterns, but this is the poncho I want to make! Alas, there's no pattern to be found. Is there some way for someone to reverse engineer the pattern? Who would do that, and would it be super expensive?
posted by swheatie at 3:31 PM PST - 8 comments

Recommendation for a resume-writing expert for a copywriter?

I'm in the middle of a job search that's taking way too long (digital copywriter/ACD, NYC metro area). I've been told by a recruiter that my resume needs work. I think I need to work with a pro on this. Can anyone recommend a good one? [more inside]
posted by PlusDistance at 2:56 PM PST - 1 comment

What should I do with my lawn jockey?

My house came with a lawn jockey. With its current paint job, it is *arguably* not a racist caricature (i.e. it is white, as am I), so we left it up for a few months out of a vague sort of sense of respect for the previous homeowners, who had lived there for ~40 years and apparently loved the lawn jockey. Now the jockey is in the garage and we have a large planter where he used to be. My garage is small and this cannot continue indefinitely. [more inside]
posted by mskyle at 2:08 PM PST - 22 comments

Dress Me: Hamburg in Autumn

I will be leaving for Hamburg, Germany shortly and I'm a bit out of my element when it comes to weather appropriate Autumn wear. I come from a dry, snowy, very cold climate and the concept of humid/wet weather in November/December is very confusing to me. I will be staying there from mid-October to mid-December, with a little bit of travel into northern France and eastern Germany. [more inside]
posted by Robocat at 1:43 PM PST - 5 comments

Geting from Airport to NOTA

I will be going to a conference in Rochester, NY. I'll be staying at the Choice Hotel at the airport, but I need to get to the School of the Arts in the NOTA district. How far apart are they? Is there any public transit available, or if I have to take an Uber or a Lyft, how much can I expect to spend
posted by CollectiveMind at 1:01 PM PST - 6 comments

Orgy-free sound library

I need a varied sound effects library like this one that doesn't include any of the sound effects like what they have here as "orgy" because I do not want to explain what that is supposed to be to any of the tweens I'm working with. It has to be online and free. Got a good one? [more inside]
posted by blnkfrnk at 12:57 PM PST - 11 comments

Teach me how to infographic

With support from my supervisor and colleague, I need to summarize relevant aspects of a very complex topic (immigration law) in a way that my colleagues can understand and apply to the program that we oversee. I'm looking at this book, this one, this one, and this one. I'm interested in MOOCs, books, videos, or any resource that will help me go from basically zero knowledge to proficiency. I am technical and have design skills, but building a complex infographic is currently beyond my skill level. Help?
posted by onecircleaday at 12:44 PM PST - 12 comments

ISO an excellent scanner - scanning artwork for publication

I am scanning artwork (black and white line drawings and watercolor illustrations) for professional publication. What scanner should I buy? Under $400? more details inside. [more inside]
posted by zingiberene at 12:42 PM PST - 5 comments

Turn an old blog into rss feed or emails

I would like the reviews category posts from this blog to be delivered to me at slow intervals (preferably weekly or at the same intervals they were posted on the blog) via email or an rss feed. Is there a tool that can do this? Important: just subscribing now does me no good because the blog no longer updates and that wouldn't deliver old posts anyway.
posted by congen at 11:40 AM PST - 3 comments

No more Brooks Pure Cadence!

I just found out that Brooks is going to discontinue their Pure Cadence shoes. I've been using them for years and, dang it, I love them. I like the stability and zero drop. For that reason, they're great for racewalking and trail running. My running store said to try the Altra Escalante. I like their zero drop and the cushioning. The heel's a little wide, though, which makes it hard to plant the foot during racewalking. Any recommendations for a low drop, minimally cushioned, light weight running shoe? Thanks.
posted by holdenjordahl at 11:29 AM PST - 6 comments

Help me electric toothbrush

I'm 48. Speak to me like I'm five. Why can't I figure out how to brush my teeth with an electric toothbrush without getting drool *everywhere* and getting the non-brush hard plastic bits grinding against other teeth and gums? [more inside]
posted by media_itoku at 9:15 AM PST - 31 comments

Give me your best vegetarian recipes for a Dutch oven

I just bought a beautiful Dutch oven (5 1/2 quarts, Le Crueset, French Riviera color). What should I make in it? There are two of us, both vegetarian. I love to cook and bake, and we camp a lot in summertime. Thanks!
posted by sugarbomb at 9:00 AM PST - 13 comments

A Hairy(less) Situation

I have been diagnosed with frontal fibrosing alopecia. Wondering if anyone has had experience with Plaquenil or Propecia in treating this disease, or with the disease in particular. [more inside]
posted by ElleElle at 7:25 AM PST - 7 comments

smart home ownership in a transitional neighborhood

We bought a lovely house. It's our first house (after a long time in apartments), and it's in a different kind of neighborhood than we've lived in before. Help us stay both safe and neighborly? [more inside]
posted by skookumsaurus rex at 5:06 AM PST - 11 comments

Is Java Island the densest area in the world?

Geographers and statisticians and demography wonks! Java is an island of Indonesia. If it was a country, it would have 2% of the world's population, being the 10th most populous country in the world, while only being the size of North Carolina/Greece. This seems to be on a whole another magnitude of continuous density than anywhere else in the world. Are there any areas in the world around 53,588 sq mi/138,793 sq km that have just as many people? [more inside]
posted by facehugger at 3:45 AM PST - 17 comments

October 2

Micromanaged in new role, possibly abusive environment. Need advice.

I have taken on a new role at work, working closely with a contractor. Things aren't vibing out between us at all, and it's coming to the point where I feel daily dread and anxiety. I'd like advice on how to proceed, based on experiences in a potentially toxic workplace. [more inside]
posted by thoughtful_analyst at 10:09 PM PST - 16 comments

Should I put my Visa requirements on my resume?

Against all odds I am going trying to get a job in Los Angeles... but i'm a UK citizen. [more inside]
posted by ihaveyourfoot at 9:33 PM PST - 9 comments

Recommend me a word processor?

I would like to get a new word processor for my (newish, adequately powerful) Windows 10 computer, specifically for writing fiction. I don't need it to have a lot of features or do a lot of powerful formatting, but I am a little picky. What's out there that I should look into? [more inside]
posted by Jeanne at 9:18 PM PST - 17 comments

Linking to PDF drawings for download on a Wordpress page

How do I link to/post/host PDFs for download on my Wordpress site? [more inside]
posted by anya32 at 9:09 PM PST - 5 comments

What should I do in NYC 10/3?

I'm in town with my wife who is speaking at a conference and I have the day to myself. Can't do the art museums or major tourist stuff without her so what should I do? [more inside]
posted by Uncle at 8:06 PM PST - 17 comments

Navratri hostess gift?

What should I bring as a hostess gift to a friend’s Navratri party? My friend and her husband are hosting a Navratri party at their apartment. What is an appropriate hostess gift? They are both probably in their mid to late thirties, born in India, and have lived in the US for a decade, if it matters.
posted by fieldtrip at 7:47 PM PST - 3 comments

The Civil War Historiography of my High School Textbook

There's a name for the way my 1980's edition of The American Pageant approached slavery and secession. What is it? [more inside]
posted by mark k at 7:21 PM PST - 7 comments

Hotel in London with a bath?

I'm heading to London for a wedding in December and am likely to be tired and cranky for the first day after flying in on a red-eye flight. I'm looking for a nice hotel which is easily accessible from Victoria Station that has a large bathtub I can soak in because I miss having one at home. Preferably under £200/night. There's only me, and I don't mind if the room is small as long as there is a deep bath. Is this doable and does anyone have any recommendations? The places I'm finding so far only have them in super expensive suites.
posted by Kris10_b at 6:42 PM PST - 7 comments

Help me make Pinterest be less terrible

I do google image searches to get ideas for projects. More often than not, pictures I'm interested in show up on GIS but takes me to a pinterest page, but then i can't get anymore information about the picture because pinterest seems like a black hole of bad links. How do I stop pinterest be less terrible? [more inside]
posted by Karaage at 6:36 PM PST - 8 comments

The Earth + Plastic

Although I tend to agree with the late George Carlin's thoughts on the matter in the bit referenced in the headline, I would still like to attempt to save the planet/the human habitat. Or at least do my part not to kill it/us. So far, I try/do the following: [more inside]
posted by WinterSolstice at 6:21 PM PST - 14 comments

Books or resources about cultivating closer relationships as an adult?

Not exclusively as an adult, and also particularly interested in books or resources about becoming a more nurturing and giving person, and/or focused on introverts. [more inside]
posted by knownfossils at 5:46 PM PST - 2 comments

Seeking a USA made robe for a Minnesota winter

I’d like to buy my boyfriend a cozy, hotel-style cushy white bathrobe for his birthday. The caveat is, I’d love for it to be made in the USA (ethically made somewhere else is okay, too). This is harder to find than it seems. [more inside]
posted by sucre at 5:39 PM PST - 8 comments

Leaving the U.S. for better health care system? esp. Canada vs Portugal

I've become interested in living abroad, particularly in permanent residency in Canada (via an investor visa or skilled worker visa) or Portugal (via their golden visa.) Is one better than the other if my concern is good public health care? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 5:31 PM PST - 6 comments

Is my cat crying?

I notice on my cats face a wetness that drips when she hugs me. It isnt just a moist nose it's a dripping from her mouth area. When I touch her face it seems a tad bit dampened but some of it could be from her grooming. She could be drooling but even then why when she isnt hungry? Do cats cry? I dont suspect any illness.
posted by The_imp_inimpossible at 5:12 PM PST - 13 comments

positive fictional depictions of fat women

I'm reading the Shell Seekers, and it's a beautiful, pleasurable read so far, except for one thing that's rankling me: the repeated contempt for overweight women, the exaltation of the naturally slender, and the correlation of female overweight with poor character. This is something I have noticed in other otherwise kind-natured books as well. Help me find some counterpoints. [more inside]
posted by fingersandtoes at 5:02 PM PST - 28 comments

Vincent Price marathon suggestions

Give my your top picks for a Vincent Price marathon. These do not all have to be in the horror genre, but it's hard to hear that voice without a shiver!
posted by TrishaU at 3:19 PM PST - 29 comments

Is arbitrary 1st page formatting in Mac Word 2016 w/text flow possible?

I am trying to stop having to manually format each of my work letters that are longer than a page. To do that I need Word to act more like a page layout program, and let me have the body text on the first page have a different indent than the rest of the documents — regardless of where the first page breaks relative to the text on it. Can I bludgeon Word into doing this? [more inside]
posted by snuffleupagus at 3:05 PM PST - 3 comments

Explain tamales to me like I’m five

(and didn’t grow up with Mexican food). They’re delicious, but I feel like I fundamentally don’t get them. It’s like a dumpling... but you can’t eat the outside? [more inside]
posted by Questolicious at 1:54 PM PST - 31 comments

Carsharing using Getaround?

Has anyone on MeFi used Getaround for car sharing? Tell me about it! [more inside]
posted by pdb at 1:50 PM PST - 3 comments

What color eyeglasses do I want?

I am a bi female, slightly genderqueerish. My hair is brown with strands of silver glitter; I wear it shorn fairly close to the scalp. My eyes are on the blueish side of hazel. I have rosacea, and my cheeks, in particular, are pretty freaking red. My favorite color is purple, though I also like blue, pink, and the bluer greens. Currentish pic, current glasses are blueish-gray leopart. What color frames do I want for my new glasses?
posted by The Almighty Mommy Goddess at 1:47 PM PST - 12 comments

More Lore (Olympus)

I have fallen deeply, intensely in love with Lore Olympus and need more comics/books like it. [more inside]
posted by thefang at 12:31 PM PST - 2 comments

How to help 75yo mom with mobility & mental health issues from afar?

About two months ago, my 75-year-old mother called 911 because she couldn’t walk. They brought her to the hospital where she stayed for 3 days (Medicare requirement), then she was admitted to a rehab facility. They provided physical therapy during her ~4-week stay and sent her home. The next day, she fell and couldn’t get up, and this hospital/rehab cycle repeated. [more inside]
posted by scottso17 at 12:24 PM PST - 10 comments

Staying calm in chaos

I am seeking fresh ideas to stay calm in chaos. The chaos could be visual clutter at a friend's house or an overwhelming deluge of work tasks, bids for attention or decisions at work, or staying centered around children doing art and getting tiny bits of paper everywhere. More inside. [more inside]
posted by crunchy potato at 11:57 AM PST - 19 comments

Shouldn't texting from the US to the UK be less of a kerfuffle?

While in the UK, I tried to text my UK friend from my US-based cell phone, and nothing happened. Back in the US, I've tried alternative protocols, and I'm getting error messages. [more inside]
posted by The Wrong Kind of Cheese at 11:55 AM PST - 21 comments

How do I make a rectangle in Paint.net?

Using the Rectangle Select tool I end up with a shaded proposed outline of a rectangle but not the actual rectangle. I don't understand how to make it commit, and actually draw the rectangle. [more inside]
posted by lockedroomguy at 10:36 AM PST - 1 comment

Taking more noise out of life

Maybe six months ago, I stopped listening to NPR/music on my 30 minute commute and most other drives. I don't remember how I decided to do this, but it feels good, like I've turned down the static/ambient noise a tiny bit in my life. Since then, I've done a couple of comparable things, but am looking for other suggestions. [more inside]
posted by less of course at 10:29 AM PST - 33 comments

Want a texting program that alerts me when I get a phone call.

I used to use something called MightyText, and it worked like a dream. A few updates ago it stopped working and I'd like to find a solution. [more inside]
posted by cartoonella at 9:57 AM PST - 5 comments

Seeking a labor and employment attorney in Texas

Looking for a labor and employment attorney in Texas, preferably in the Dallas-Forth Worth area, regarding a possible wrongful termination claim. Thanks for any recommendations.
posted by Conrad Cornelius o'Donald o'Dell at 9:49 AM PST - 2 comments

Coding bootcamp or at-home DIY?

I've been working in games for almost a decade now. With the birth of my first son and a recent lay-off/generous severance I've been looking ahead to try and figure out if that's really where I want to stay. It's been hard to find work after a recent move, the hours are horrific and the pay gets less good every year (Long gone are the bonuses after crunch!). Recently I've been thinking about moving to full stack front end work- There are way more gigs out there for it. I have a now very rusty background in web dev, but my technical chops are intact. Since I'd be "starting over", my question is this: Is it worth it to do a coding bootcamp or should I just stay home, DIY it and get a great portfolio together? I ask because games is very portfolio & relationship driven. A degree can be nice but was never a requirement. If you could do the work you'd be hired. Is there a similar ethos in mainline development work? or do I need some credentials to stand out?
posted by GilloD at 9:14 AM PST - 6 comments

Help Me Improve My Low Budget Pescatarian Diet

I live on a low budget diet of brown rice, legumes, vegetables and cheap fruit supplemented with eggs, dairy and canned sardines. I would like to add more protein and improve things overall to improve my health and lose weight. [more inside]
posted by whitelotus at 8:26 AM PST - 37 comments

Help me build my Japan Itinerary

Three mid-to-late 20 somethings will be flying into Tokyo (HND) on November 20th and departing on November 28th. What should we do while we're there? [more inside]
posted by lucy.jakobs at 8:18 AM PST - 8 comments

How can I sell or give away these tickets?

I bought tickets to see Nick Cave in Austin, TX this weekend but I didn't realize that the huge music festival happening at the same time would make that unaffordable for me to fly and get a hotel there. I've never resold tickets in general, but the added complication of them being pdf tickets and being located in a different state makes it extra difficult. I have an ad on CL but that feels sketchy. Any resources you would recommend? Is there a local Austin IG account I can contact to do a giveaway?
posted by Marinara at 8:07 AM PST - 5 comments

which dog joint supplement to use?

If you give your elderly dog with joint problems a supplement - which one do you give (and why that one)? [more inside]
posted by mirileh at 7:11 AM PST - 12 comments

is there a way to access a log file or activity file on iOS

I need to access information entered in evernote last night that somehow got deleted shortly after being entered and is missing from the "note history" feature in evernote (possibly due to a syncing issue as I was in the tube when the info was entered). I am wondering if iOS has any sort of key logging history or other ways to retrieve information that was clearly entered in iOS and saved in evernote (however briefly). If iOS has its own key logger or similar that would be exactly what I'd need to retrieve the missing information.
posted by specialk420 at 4:52 AM PST - 2 comments

A book about being a ghost

I read a book around 2002-2005 or so that I'm trying to remember the title of. There was a man who died and then existed in a misty world where he waited until the last person who remembered him died, and then he would fade away. It wasn't a fantasy or sci fi book, I think it was a contemporary literary novel. [more inside]
posted by Rufous-headed Towhee heehee at 4:02 AM PST - 11 comments

Would I benefit from therapy?

So I am having a good year, things are mostly going well and I’m happy. Despite plenty of difficulties in the past I don’t have anything specific I would need to work on in therapy. Ironically I just found out about a therapy practice which does after hours in a good location in my city, and so I was wondering if it would be worth giving them a try. [more inside]
posted by EatMyHat at 2:49 AM PST - 14 comments

What is the Difference Between a Fistula and an Adenoma Structurally?

Looking for the specific structural differences between a fistula and an adenoma structurally and content-wise and also their genesis. If anyone has any images to compare the 2 microscopically, that would be sublime. Thank you.
posted by watercarrier at 2:28 AM PST - 5 comments

October 1

Why do magic wands look the way they do?

The origin of the black-with-white-tip magic wand in stage magic is often attributed to legendary stage magician Robert Houdin, specifically via his book. Why did he decide to describe the wand as such? [more inside]
posted by divabat at 11:27 PM PST - 13 comments

Losing molars, how to decide?

Dentist wants to pull my remaining two molars on the top left side. Both teeth have old root canals and crowns, though the teeth to me seem sturdy with no looseness. But, I did go in to get a cavity filled by the gums in one of the molars. I am a little freaked out, and writing this question at 2am as I cannot sleep. [more inside]
posted by Glinn at 11:05 PM PST - 8 comments

WTF is going on, low-bandwidth American/Aus politics edition?

I am travelling in India with very low amounts of internet and haven't read the news for just over two weeks. Today I finally checked and... wow. The problem is that whatever happened seems to have happened several weeks ago, and so all the current articles assume lots of background knowledge already. I also still only have slow intermittent internet so can't go down all the rabbit holes. Where can I find a succinct summary of what's going on? Whatever the thing is with Trump and impeachment and Ukraine, and also why Australian politics has somehow been dragged into it?
posted by lollusc at 10:13 PM PST - 8 comments

Looking for amazing vegetarian Chinese food

There's a restaurant in Chapel Hill that serves General Tso's Soy Chicken - fried chewy bits, good sauce, fresh vegetables. Is there something like that in Chicago? Note: not looking for fake meat made out of corn starch, tapioca, or arrow root (e.g. starch), but more proteiny stuff, like soy chicken or maybe seitan/gluten. [more inside]
posted by amtho at 4:01 PM PST - 9 comments

Photoshop Quick Mask Weirdness

Suddenly, Quick Mask in Photoshop is doing strange things and I don't know why. Can please hope me? [more inside]
posted by Thorzdad at 3:39 PM PST - 10 comments

Looking for travel advice from New Orleans area MeFites

I need to make a day trip from the Mississippi Gulf Coast to Trader Joe's in Metairie, with a stop somewhere for a cheap liquor stock-up. [more inside]
posted by mccxxiii at 3:17 PM PST - 3 comments

The next best thing to a dinner pill

What are some of the most "broadly" nutritious foods? By which I mean foods which contain significant levels of a wide range of nutrients. [more inside]
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 2:57 PM PST - 20 comments

Fighting climate change at the bank

This article on the blue was really inspiring as a strategy to address climate change by focusing pressure on financing institutions to move away from the fossil fuel industry. Now that I'm excited to do something to support this, and I'm looking for help in deciding how to do this. [more inside]
posted by beepbeepboopboop at 2:53 PM PST - 4 comments

So Bad at Masturbating

In the last few months I've been much more interested in penetrative sex and had much more pleasure from it, which has been great! But strangely, exactly at the time this started I became really bad at masturbating - which is frustrating as that has always been the only way I had orgasms. Has anyone got a solution, or a book or website that offers detailed help? [more inside]
posted by justapuppet1999 at 2:50 PM PST - 20 comments

ESTA - point of contact?

I'll be travelling to the US soon and while my ESTA is still valid, my friend who I originally stated as my point of contact no longer has an address in the US (he's just travelling around the country at the moment) and his visa expired recently. [more inside]
posted by U.N.Owen at 2:05 PM PST - 3 comments

Should I do anything to protect my iPhone 11 Pro's lenses?

People have always used lens caps to protect the lenses on their expensive cameras. I just got an iPhone 11 Pro, and one of its main features is the camera system. Shouldn't I cover its lenses when I put it in my pocket or bag? But how? [more inside]
posted by Winnie the Proust at 1:32 PM PST - 10 comments

What to do, what to do?

I’ve made it out of retail and into public health, but I’m still not sure I’m on the right path. I need some career advice. [more inside]
posted by bluloo at 1:30 PM PST - 2 comments

how terrible is a long commute?

i have two job opportunities and am mostly nervous about the transit-based commute. tell me about your long commute. bonus if it's in chicago. [more inside]
posted by quadrilaterals at 1:14 PM PST - 38 comments

What's the origin of "Portland Orange"?

I learned this morning that traffic signal engineering specifications for DON'T WALK crosswalk signals in the US require that "Portland Orange" be the color used. This appears to go back to at least the mid-1950s as a specification, but I'm having trouble finding out (a) when exactly that specification came into being and more to the point (b) what the etymology of the name "Portland Orange" is in the first place! [more inside]
posted by cortex at 12:12 PM PST - 8 comments

Greyhound says what?

What's the current state of Greyhound bus experience? Are the rules about quiet enforced? Is there a lot of body odor? Recent experiences and tips requested, as the last question is a decade old. [more inside]
posted by wnissen at 10:51 AM PST - 14 comments

Trustworthy pet information site?

When I want trustworthy medical information about humans, I rely on MayoClinic.com. What's the corresponding site for reliable info for dogs and cats?
posted by conscious matter at 10:50 AM PST - 6 comments

Yet Another Excel Bulk Hyperlink Question

This isn't a question about converting a bunch of Hyperlinks in excel to URLs, nor is it a question about putting multiple hyperlinks into a cell. But it is a question about bulk hyperlinks in Excel. There has got to be a bulk system for doing what i"m doing, but I can't articulate it well enough to search for it. So lemme try asking humans instead of Google. [more inside]
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 10:22 AM PST - 26 comments

Health insurance for two soon-to-be uninsured cancer patients...

My parents both have cancer. Mom just lost her job and, as such, her employer-provided insurance that covered her and my dad. They've got COBRA now but can't afford to keep paying the insane premiums for that. There are no ACA plans available that are accepted by their treatment providers and they don't qualify for our state's Medicaid. What do and holy god, does insurance in this country just suck or what... [more inside]
posted by youandiandaflame at 10:18 AM PST - 14 comments

The search for feather-weight furniture

Moving into a 4-story walk-up apartment and I'd love to find some furniture (especially a sofa) that comes in pieces that weigh less than 40 pounds so that I can get it up the stairs. [more inside]
posted by forkisbetter at 10:14 AM PST - 11 comments

Seeking a small Windows 10 box that can play Steam games

I’m looking for a small Windows 10 machine that can run Steam and some games decently. [more inside]
posted by odinsdream at 10:13 AM PST - 14 comments

Essays/Articles That Opened Your Mind

In search of nonfiction that makes you go, "Huh. Never thought of it like that before.” Suggestions, please! [more inside]
posted by xenization at 8:16 AM PST - 53 comments

I need to purchase t-shirts - the kind with things on them

For reasons, I need to have a couple of t-shirts with...designs. I'm really not a t-shirt person, but if I have to buy and wear them I don't want to hate them. I want nicely made ones that aren't itchy or totally cheap. Where do I get them? Details within. [more inside]
posted by Frowner at 7:58 AM PST - 18 comments

Anyone know of any effective strategies for reframing "fun"?

I'm very good at forcing myself to do really big, difficult, long term mental tasks. I'm terrible at prioritizing anything else (eg fun or escapist) and feel guilty if I'm not working towards a big, long term goal. Any advice? Too many snowflake details within. [more inside]
posted by wooh at 6:08 AM PST - 22 comments

Big Flex

My company just announced they were giving everyone the option of working flex schedules. Tell me about what changed when you switched over. [more inside]
posted by backseatpilot at 6:07 AM PST - 23 comments

How do I accept a sincere Day of Atonement apology?

Sometimes, my Jewish friends and coworkers will approach me for forgiveness around Yom Kippur. I’m not Jewish, but am always humbled by the gesture and intent. However, I really don’t know how to respond in the moment. Accepting the (sometimes very direct) apology seems to me to be acknowledging that my friend has done a wrong against me, which makes me uncomfortable. Assuring them they have nothing to be forgiven for seems disrespectful of the intent of the request. My brain spins and I tend to get tongue-tied at this point. [more inside]
posted by These Premises Are Alarmed at 6:03 AM PST - 16 comments

Repair wood chair in NYC?

I need some wood chairs repaired in NYC. Any recommendations?
posted by ebesan at 5:12 AM PST - 2 comments

Unbiased consumer reviews online?

The web is a sea of advertisements masquerading as content, so what are your go-to sites for fair consumer product reviews? I just found The Wire Cutter ("A New York Times Company") that seems to fit the description. What else?
posted by Jason and Laszlo at 3:38 AM PST - 33 comments

Help me plan a vacation scavenger hunt in Japan!

We'll be traveling to Japan in 2 weeks time with my 5-year old. One of the things we plan to do is walk a lot; in particular we're going on a short hike through the countryside. To keep my kid from getting too bored, I was thinking of preparing a sort of scavenger hunt for him to play while we're on our feet: a list of things he'd need to spot and point out while walking around. I need help coming up with that list! [more inside]
posted by destrius at 3:02 AM PST - 6 comments

What good discussion looks like, and where to find it.

What makes internet discussion good? And where do you go to get it? (MeFi included, natch.) [more inside]
posted by rustipi at 2:26 AM PST - 4 comments