Gaming the spit test
February 27, 2008 11:25 AM   Subscribe

How do I pass an oral (saliva) drug test?

Being a stoner and a moron, I assumed the company I was interviewing with would use urine testing. I've passed piss tests I should have failed before with ease with the gallons of water + vitamin B method.

However, I have an oral swab test scheduled for 10:30 tomorrow. The last time I smoked pot was about 30 hours before the appointment. The longest time range I've heard for saliva testing was drug use in the past 48 hours, but I've also read 12-24 hours.

Is there anything I can do to interfere with the results of the drug test? Holding the swab in the center of my mouth rather than betwixt cheek and gum? Smoking cigarettes before going in? I'm planning to have a very clean mouth, at the very least. Would it be better to be very hydrated (more diluted spit?) or dehydrated (dry mouth)? Are there any foods/legal drugs that would cause a false positive I could blame failing on to get a retest?

I know Mythbusters already proved that there's no way to fool a breathalyser, but there's got to be some way to nudge my chances a little on the oral swab test.

The only drug I'm concerned about is marijuana.
posted by anonymous to Work & Money (10 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
How about calling in sick (and getting a doctor's note) for that day so you can get another day or so of cleanup time?
posted by By The Grace of God at 11:28 AM on February 27, 2008

You might be ok. The Wikipedia entry says it detects for about 14 hours after smoking.
posted by electroboy at 11:39 AM on February 27, 2008

According to this site, mouthwash should do the trick. But I'm sure drinking a lot of water will help as well. Good luck!
posted by farishta at 11:43 AM on February 27, 2008

Good luck - I've heard that if you've got 48 hours between smoke and swab, you're cool.
posted by jtron at 3:25 PM on February 27, 2008

From an HR perspective:

I don't know in what state and with what company you interviewed with but...

If you fail that first test. The company MAY allow you to get a second test if you flat out DENY doing drugs.

The reasoning for this is a "false positive". Drug tests aren't 100% accurate. They are 99.something accurate. That means that if 10,000 clean people take the test...a few will be reported as positive.

SO, a second test is allowed (although you might have to pay for it). If you pass, then yeah. If you don't...dont ever think about applying there again.

I hope you were smart, and didn't smoke any between your test and now.

Good luck...don't do drugs.
posted by hal_c_on at 5:39 PM on February 27, 2008

Just as a datapoint I can confirm what hal_c_on says about second tries. Before administering the swab test they told me straight out that if I failed the test they would still hire me for the job and wait for the results of a second test to come through to make sure it wasn't false positive. That was working part-time at a supermarket though so YMMV. Good luck.
posted by woolylambkin at 7:11 PM on February 27, 2008

That was working part-time at a supermarket though

WTF? Drug testing for working part-time at a supermarket????
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 4:06 AM on February 28, 2008

WTF? Drug testing for working part-time at a supermarket????

Someone that has been smoking a lot of pot really isn't safe to be working in a supermarket. Just think of all the bags of chips and stuff they could go through when no one is watching. ;>

But yeah in all seriousness, seems like a total waste of time/money to drug test supermarket employees.
posted by GlowWyrm at 9:44 AM on February 28, 2008

Slight derail, but this actually seems like an improvement over the urine and hair test, because it's not "have you smoked pot in the last month" test, it's a "can you not smoke for three or four days" test.
posted by electroboy at 9:47 AM on February 28, 2008 [1 favorite]

I imagine the supermarket did the testing for legal/safety reasons. Think about how high up some products can be in some supermarkets, especially in the stockroom. Which require forklifts and scissor lifts to get to.
posted by aerotive at 9:15 PM on February 28, 2008

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