Ring-Buying for the Anxious
January 23, 2007 11:06 AM   Subscribe

Going to buy a ring for my partner for our anniversary on the sly.

We're both 25. She's small, 5'1 and 100lbs or so, and my friends and I have estimated wears a ring somewhere between a 7 and a 9. She's athletic and tends to wear pretty wide rings, right now nothing as expensive as I want to buy her. We live in Washington, DC, just for the record.

Some requirements:

* Sapphire (birthstone)
* White Gold/Titanium/Silver/etc.
* No diamonds
* Less than $400

In my searching and past-AskMefi'ing I've found this, which I fell in love with: the style, the pattern, etc. Unfortunately it's a stacking ring and is most likely much too delicate. There's also this but feels too wide, though I'll admit I don't know how wide 5mm really is. Otherwise I find a lot of ugly rings, with big stones or bad settings, eternity bands all mostly with diamonds.

Questions: Where do you go to get your jewelry online (I don't mind going to a storefront once I've seen their site, but to start)? I'm having a very hard time sorting out the shady and the crap from the decent and non-exclusively diamond/engagement. Do you have an idea where I can find some interesting/unique/reasonably priced rings, perhaps similar to the ones posted above? Is 5mm a reasonable size for a small woman to wear?

This is the first time I've done this for any relationship, and am myself not a jewelry wearer, and sort of nervous about this, so any insight would be much appreciated.
posted by atayah to Shopping (22 answers total)
 
5 mm is half a centimeter, or about 1/5 of an inch.
posted by scody at 11:20 AM on January 23, 2007


I've looked at Overstock.com before and have liked some of there stuff. Usually priced pretty reasonably.

If she's 5'1" and 100 lbs she probably wears more in the 5-7 range. I'm twice her weight and wear an 8.5. Just sayin.
posted by orangemiles at 11:22 AM on January 23, 2007


Not an answer to your question, but are you sure she wears between a 7 and 9? Most women wear a 6 or 7 on their ring finger, and at 5'1" and 100 lbs, your girlfriend is smaller than average. I would be amazed if her fingers were that large. Before you purchase a ring that may not fit, can you surreptitiously borrow a ring from her that she wears on her ring finger so that you can determine her ring size?
posted by amro at 11:24 AM on January 23, 2007


Response by poster: thanks everyone so far. amro and orangemsiles--Did sneak a ring from her (she had lost another ring and took this one off because she felt unbalanced), but of course it happens to be pretty beat up. Gave it to a friend to size while she was at work, and she's the one who came up with the 7-9. 5-7 sounds much more right to me. Partner's fingers are definitely sturdy, but no, not exceptionally large. So I am probably judging it wrong; unfortunately, the only rings she owns are the ones she wears!
posted by atayah at 11:27 AM on January 23, 2007


Oh, and I realllly like that second one you linked to. I had looked at something like that but with diamonds. I like this as well but without the bend in the ring. Don't be afraid to go to a jeweler and ask about having something made for her. Gold is expensive right now but you might like the one-of-a-kind idea.
posted by orangemiles at 11:28 AM on January 23, 2007


How about this or this? Also, is the "no diamonds" thing set in stone (heh)? 'Cause this is adorable, and this is cute, too.

Also, in re: ring size, I wear a 7, and I'm 5'5", 140lbs.
posted by Verdandi at 11:35 AM on January 23, 2007


Sneak the ring from her again and take it to the nearest local jeweler. They have a little cylinder thing that they can put the ring on to find out what size it is. It's better to know for sure, especially if you're buying an eternity band that might be hard to size.
posted by Addlepated at 11:37 AM on January 23, 2007


What size shoe does she take? It's a fairly accurate rule of, er, thumb that (American) shoe size will be the same as ring size.

Me, for unusual and romantic jewelry, I love Sundance.
posted by essexjan at 11:39 AM on January 23, 2007


You can also sneak her ring from its bedtime hiding place, push it into some Silly Putty, and take the imprint to a jeweler. While you're there, ask them for catalogs or recommendations.
A warning about this, however: different band widths might mean different ring sizes. I discovered this when my then-pre-fiancee took one of my rings as a size indicator, and my engagement ring was too big because the band was so thin. (We got it resized.) Better too big than too small, though.

Also, and this is only tangential but I feel I must mention, sapphires are generally considered engagement stones. Not as prominently as diamonds are, but they are the close second and it's something you should think about if you're getting this for a romantic partner to whom you are not already married or engaged.

All of that said, some store suggestions are bluenile.com, tiffanys.com, zales.com, kay.com

From what I can tell from your links and their selections, the type of ring you like will almost always be referred to as a 'stacking ring'. I suggest you go into a few stores and look at the rings in person, to get a feel for what they will look like on her.
posted by Sprout the Vulgarian at 12:00 PM on January 23, 2007




Hmmm, without an actual ring that fits on the intended finger you're not going to get her size correct (data point: I'm a little taller and a little heavier than she is and I wear a 5 1/2). If you must buy without an accurate size you should get something that can be sized easily, meaning you shouldn't buy anything with fancy engraving or an infinity ring. If you get something with a plain band in the back it will be cheap and easy for a local jewler to make the ring the correct size.
posted by robinpME at 12:24 PM on January 23, 2007


I would recommend Teno from Germany.
I got this as a spontaneous gift for an ex-partner. My ex is very sporty and she loved the ring because it was so durable and didn't have any edges.

Keep in mind that stainless steel and other hard metals cant be resized, so make sure the ring can be exchanged if you go with this option.
posted by Binliner at 12:27 PM on January 23, 2007


but of course it happens to be pretty beat up. Gave it to a friend to size while she was at work, and she's the one who came up with the 7-9.

Sneak the ring from her again and take it to the nearest local jeweler. They have a little cylinder thing that they can put the ring on to find out what size it is. It's better to know for sure, especially if you're buying an eternity band that might be hard to size.

That beat-up ring was likely put on a mandrel (the cylinder thing), but in order to get a better idea of the size, your friend pushed the ring until it was a rounder shape. Sounds accurate? It's not -- they probably stretched the ring without realizing it.

If she's 5'1 and 100lbs or so, she almost certainly wears something between a 5 and a 7, unless she's unusually big-boned. At which point she'd weigh more than 100 pounds.

Eternity bands are indeed a pain to size, and some stores /companies will flat out refuse. Similarly, those inset stones can be a problem, depending on how the ring was made. Some lazier jewelry manufacturers glue them in, which means that if the ring undergoes any stress, the stones pop out. If you want stones set like that, I'd say that you should go to a real goldsmith, not a jewelry manufacturer.

The wider the band, the larger size she'll need.

/I have a side job in jewelry, and can usually eyeball someone's finger size +/- 1 size.
posted by desuetude at 12:41 PM on January 23, 2007


What about Tiffany? Something like this? A friend of mine has one with an emerald and wears it alone, it's quite nice. Or, get two at just over your limit?

(if you'e not completely wedded to sapphire, but rather the color blue, there is a really beautiful Lapis ring a few pages later).

Of course, Tiffany means you're paying for the name and all that, but if she likes that sort of thing.....
posted by dpx.mfx at 12:42 PM on January 23, 2007


Oh, I forgot to mention - I have read good things about Signed Pieces, although I haven't ordered from them myself. They have a line of their own, and they also sell vintage/used designer jewelry, sometimes at very good prices.
posted by Addlepated at 12:48 PM on January 23, 2007


for size, take one of her rings she wears on the finger you want to buy the ring for when she is not around, slide it over one of your fingers and mark it off. (I did this using marks on my hand like "wrinkles" or small scars. Then go to the jeweler and use a ring sizing kit to find the size. Alternatively, some online Jewelry shops will ship you a free ring sizing kit.
posted by jeffe at 12:48 PM on January 23, 2007


Response by poster: Man alive, are you all fantastic. I can't wait to pursue these links. As for her ring size--good call, I really need to figure it out, especially since I'll probably be buying a hard-metal ring. Keep suggestions coming. Is it appropriate to Yay on MeFi? Yay!
posted by atayah at 1:01 PM on January 23, 2007


I like Peora. Mostly I shop their semiprecious stones, in which they have great deals and interesting unusual settings; they don't have a large selection in precious stones - what they offer are one-time deals not constant stock (and they tend toward "classic" i.e. flashy/ugly settings at the high end) but their prices are amazing for what you're getting and they do get some offbeat pieces. I found this (one large oval sapphire setting) and this (round stack-band style with inset tiled sapphires) available right now in your price range.
posted by Melinika at 2:20 PM on January 23, 2007


I really love David Virtue's rings. We got them for our wedding rings, but they really aren't all that traditional looking.

Easy to buy online, and just what we were looking for.
posted by Invoke at 2:27 PM on January 23, 2007


It's a fairly accurate rule of, er, thumb that (American) shoe size will be the same as ring size.

Sample size of one, but I wear a 6.5 ring (and I'm bigger in height and weight than your partner) and a woman's 11 shoe. I wouldn't count on that.

My amazing antique wedding ring came from Topazery, but man are they spendy with sapphires. Yikes.
posted by Gucky at 4:05 PM on January 23, 2007


Sample size the 2nd: I wear size 5.25 ring, 9 shoe. Definitely find a way to size her ring.
posted by moira at 5:26 PM on January 23, 2007


Chiming in late, but I gotta recommend Suzanne Felsen in Santa Monica. Very stylin' stuff. Her cuts are very different and her sense of color is unusual, but unerringly accurate.
posted by johngumbo at 6:35 PM on January 23, 2007


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