Yet another ‘how to make friends’ post
December 10, 2006 5:31 PM   Subscribe

Yet another ‘how to make friends’ post

Yet another ‘how to make friends’ post

I lived in New York city this past year and made new friends, mainly friends who similarly enjoy the outdoors (hiking and biking) and I also plan to join outdoor clubs in the spring. However, now that the weather is becoming colder along with a need for other types of friends, I thought I would poll the collective hive for ideas

I am doing this anonymously because I also feel like a jerk stating this - I really do not feel I have made many intellectual connections with many of my current friends. Without a friendship like this, I really feel empty, so I realize I need to find new people and more friends.

Anyway, I enjoy discussing topics ranging from science to politics. I enjoy learning new information and exchanging ideas. I am hoping for suggestions to meet more people like this or activities that I can do on my own for fun.

Along these lines, on my own I have really enjoyed talks at the 92Y and public library (authors to scientists). Due to a new job and ridiculous hours during the workweek, I can’t commit to taking a weekly class.

Other factors or details that may make this difficult: I am very shy (getting better but I cannot initiate conversations with strangers and even have a hard time inviting people to things at the start of a friendship); I am in my late 30s (open to friends of all ages, but do not want to hang out with either a young college crowd or senior citizens).

Topics that I love to the point of obsession, which may help if I can find a place for meetings or events: science, biology, science fiction, other cultures and countries – there are more interests but I don’t want to get carried away because I would like specific suggestions.

If someone would prefer privately emailing me rather than posting, my account for this purpose is

posted by anonymous to Human Relations (4 answers total) 9 users marked this as a favorite
Personals sites and craigslist have sections for this, although I can't say whether or not they're effective.
posted by dilettante at 6:01 PM on December 10, 2006

Being shy myself, I've found group/clubs to be one of the best ways of meeting new people.

A book reading group? A science fiction writing group? If such things sound interesting, you might look for flyers at bookstores & cafes.
posted by treepour at 6:37 PM on December 10, 2006

If it was me, I would start a group by advertising in Craigslist for people interested in discussing topics ranging from science to politics. And I would probably have people meet in a cafe for awhile (as opposed to my home). I joined a bookclub like this (from an ad in Craigslist) and I've become good friends with some of the members. We meet in the members' homes now, but we started in a cafe that had sofas, etc.
posted by gt2 at 6:44 PM on December 10, 2006

You might already have heard of or attended these, but it sounds like you would like Cafe Scientifique. They're held in many cities, so obviously also in New York.
posted by easternblot at 9:26 AM on December 12, 2006

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