Can I get waxed downstairs and still maintain my dignity?
June 25, 2006 4:44 PM   Subscribe

I'm a guy. Can I get waxed downstairs and still maintain my dignity?

Girlfriend has said she won't do it and I guess my only option is to go to a salon.
posted by sjvilla79 to Clothing, Beauty, & Fashion (33 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite

 
You want random opinions, right? Okay, here's mine.

No. Not if you still want to be able to use the phrase "I'm a guy" and apply it to yourself without feeling deep down that you're a goddamned liar.

I'm joking. But not much, by crikey.
posted by Decani at 4:46 PM on June 25, 2006


Are you going for a 100% clean look?

Make sure that the salon that you go to emphasizes that they are male friendly.
posted by k8t at 4:46 PM on June 25, 2006


use the phrase "I'm a guy" and apply it to yourself

Not that that privelege has anything to do with dignity.

It's your nutsack / asshole. Do what you want with it. What could be more manly than that?
posted by scarabic at 4:48 PM on June 25, 2006


Why do you want it done in the first place? To please your girlfriend? It's going to HURT LIKE HELL. And then when it grows back it's rather unpleasant (for her too).

But if you're worried about the employees at the salon... they won't be fazed, trust me. They've seen it all.
posted by ClarissaWAM at 4:49 PM on June 25, 2006


What Clarissa said. That's what I meant with the dignity thing.
posted by sjvilla79 at 4:50 PM on June 25, 2006


Well, you can't be too concerned, considering that you apparently list your real-life name in your profile.

Aside from that, why not do it? You wouldn't be the first, although I think it is more of a gay thing - around Mardi Gras time in Sydney, there seem to be heaps more signs in beauty salon windows advertising "back, sack, & crack" waxing. It might be best to visit a salon in a gay enclave (um, where the hell is that in Melbourne?) for the most experienced staff, but as ClarissaWAM said, no salon employee will be surprised.
posted by UbuRoivas at 4:57 PM on June 25, 2006


Waxing "down there" doesn't hurt THAT badly. While I wouldn't want to go through it every day, it isn't awful. But growing back, you'd better get a special exfoliation pad, and exfoliate every day so that you don't get in-grown hairs.

Your girlfriend sounds like she is already concerned.
posted by k8t at 5:02 PM on June 25, 2006


NO

and i repeat... NO
posted by Dreamghost at 5:04 PM on June 25, 2006


(Don't do it. Keep it neat and trim, that's dignified; waxing it bald isn't).
posted by evariste at 5:11 PM on June 25, 2006


Perspectives via Dan Savage.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 5:23 PM on June 25, 2006


a gay enclave (um, where the hell is that in Melbourne?

It's called Sydney. It's about 800km outside Melbourne itself though.
posted by Jenga at 5:47 PM on June 25, 2006


Since you ask; No, getting waxed bald down there is not very manly unless you're looking for a job as a porn star.

And I have to say, if you are already having problems with your girlfriend thinking you might be a closeted homosexual, I'm thinking waxing your entire genital region may not be the way to go at the present time!
posted by Justinian at 5:54 PM on June 25, 2006


Per k8t's possibly apt link to your last question, I must ask: is there another question in this series that will appear?
posted by mikeh at 5:54 PM on June 25, 2006


For a slightly different perspective: It can look and feel hot (for/to a woman), but only if you're not hairy all over everywhere else at all. If you have body hair everywhere else then a bald patch just around the pubic area, you will look funny. Just trim. If you're pretty much hairless, though, go for it.
posted by Cricket at 6:05 PM on June 25, 2006


Per k8t's possibly apt link to your last question, I must ask: is there another question in this series that will appear?

Maybe ask k8t.

dignity is overrated.

Well then that settles it. Sweet.
posted by sjvilla79 at 6:08 PM on June 25, 2006


Are you two really concerned about the butthole? Or is just mainly the pubic area? If the latter, just shave! Once you shave once, make sure you're doing it semi-regularly and it'll be a cinch.

As for your backside... if she wants it trimmed that much, she should do it herself. It's not exactly an easy thing to do.
posted by Ekim Neems at 6:08 PM on June 25, 2006


And thanks Cricket and evariste.
posted by sjvilla79 at 6:09 PM on June 25, 2006


If you want to, just dip your balls in a tub of Veet (UK)
posted by RufusW at 6:11 PM on June 25, 2006


Why would you want to get waxed? For the price of a single visit to the waxing salon you can get a pair of electric clippers and do it yourself with zero pain. It's not an all-or-nothing affair, either. With the various clipper guards you can go anywhere from nearly bald to a half-inch or so of hair. This is much more comfortable and less irritating than actually having stubble down there, with the same general appearance.
posted by Rhomboid at 6:17 PM on June 25, 2006


Dignity has never been my strong suit, but I have been through this and it wasn't bad at all (my wife was complaining loudly about a bikini wax, I told her it couldn't be that bad, she said "that's easy for you to say because you won't ever do it, and the rest is history). The lady at the salon was very professional (although I understand everyone got a big kick out of it after I left) and for me the most potentially embarrasing part was coming out of the "wax room" with a waiting room full of women looking quizzically at me. Obviously, it wasn't that embarrassing since like you I am discussing it openly in front of random internet strangers. You didn't ask about details, but since I have gone this far, I will mention a couple of other things worth knowing. The discomfort is comparable to a bad sunburn or a tattoo. The lady who took care of me said most men avoid the scrotum and I certainly wasn't going that far. Toothpaste of all things is good for relieving the discomfort the first couple of days, and believe it or not growing back in itched a little but was not bad at all. In fact, it gets so hot and muggy here in the summer that I keep threatening to do it again for the nice cool breezy feeling (but probably won't). So if you think I have any dignity left after this, go for it (assuming your girlfriend won't think youve lost it).
posted by TedW at 7:34 PM on June 25, 2006


sjvilla79, have you ever had waxing? anywhere? the reason why I ask, is because the first waxing is always quite painful - no matter where it is done.

I remember the first time I had my legs waxed below the knee (that was many many years ago), and it hurt like hell, particularly on the top part of the shins, right below the knees.

I've continued with the waxing ever since, and now it does not hurt at all. My skin has gotten used to it - it's only the first time that it smarts.

I don't do this myself, I get someone to do it. My beautician waxes men and women - she tells me that couples visit her (one at a time) before valentine's day and before winter holidays. Men are now getting as much done as women - this is not as 'fringe' as it once was. Face it, it's only hair, eh-h. I live in Vancouver BC where such treatments are perhaps more usual than in other parts of North America.

When you are done with waxing, the loofah mitt is your friend, wash with the loofah (and soap) instead of a cloth. Its abrasive properties will prevent the waxed area from developing ingrown hairs.

Hair that was waxed grows back softer (and slower) than hair that was shaved. Just remember to use your loofah without fail during your morning and evening shower, once you get waxed, and you will not get ingrowns. Just don't brush your skin too hard with it - just use like a normal washcloth.

Finally, I would also suggest taking an advil or tylenol before and after the first waxing. The pain is intense, and the treatment takes a good hour (the first time around). Afterwards, maintenance treatments take a lot less time and are far less painful. Good luck to you.
posted by seawallrunner at 7:54 PM on June 25, 2006


Don't do it. I've heard it's painful, and a little creative trimming and very cautious grooming will probably achieve what you want anyway.
posted by jeff-o-matic at 8:02 PM on June 25, 2006




My ignorant, neanderthal-ish, North American opinion:

No. No es muy macho.

But hey, if you want you, don't let my backwardness cramp my style. This is America, after all. And I'm not your sexual partner, so my opinion isn't really that important.
posted by jason's_planet at 8:27 PM on June 25, 2006


It's yours. Have fun. It'll grow back. Sure, the waxing will HURT LIKE FUCK OH MY GOD WHY AM I DOING THIS TO MYSELF JEBUS OH GOD but it will grow back.
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 8:38 PM on June 25, 2006 [1 favorite]


seawallrunner's post is the best advice all around.

And then when it grows back it's rather unpleasant (for her too)

This is definitely true for shaving, which creates stubble, but I don't know if it's applicable for waxing, where the follicle has to rebuild and the hair grows in finer. It's certainly not in my experience.

I don't recommend anyone do this themselves, or at home. Even women who are quite used to grooming in bizarre positions with ridiculous products have a hard time doing their own bikini waxing. Another factor is the pain. Waxing works better when you go quickly (think the Seinfeld band-aid ripping, "one motion, right off!") -- only, when it hurts like hell, you tend to be hesitant when you pull the wax or cloth strips off. So, then, it hurts like hell, and you pulled bits of skin along with it and the hair didn't all come out anyway.

k8t is right: Do ask in advance if the salon does waxing for men. I know a couple aestheticians who will not take any male clients. I sort of understand it, because if I were a female aesthetician with a mostly female clientele, and a dude asked if he could pay me $75 to take him into a private room and put hot wax on his groin, then rip it off, I'd have a niggling concern or two.

Whether you end up waxing or shaving, get Tend Skin. It's not cheap, but a little bottle lasts a LONG time and it really alleviates ingrown hairs, bumps, rashes, clogged pores and the rest of the dermatological party that comes with depilating a moist warm area usually covered with clothing.
posted by pineapple at 9:00 PM on June 25, 2006


No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

No!

Good Lord, No!

but then who care about dignity anymore these days?
posted by caddis at 9:35 PM on June 25, 2006


I apologize for the phrasing of my previous post - but really, dignity is in your view, and the view of anyone who may view (or just know of) your actions and judge you based on them. I don't believe that waxing has any inherent connection to sexuality, but others have drawn out that connection through either their recommendations or their assumptions. If it's the same girlfriend, is she requesting it or wanting it and just doesn't want to do it personally? If this is your own choice, and (as was pointed out) this is the same girlfriend as that referenced in your previous question, then what's her opinion on it? And does that even matter, if you're set on the waxing? Most likely your personal dignity lies between your opinion and hers.

I wish you luck with your bold decision. I know I definitely lack the guts to have hair ripped off my unmentionables!
posted by mikeh at 9:58 PM on June 25, 2006


Look, hair is hair. You want to play with a different look, have a good time and enjoy it.

Whether or not you maintain your dignity is only something you will know. And you know what? A lot of the time, dignity is overrated. Get a good laugh at your own expense and move on.
posted by plinth at 3:41 AM on June 26, 2006


Go watch the waxing scene in "40-year old virgin", then imagine that pain amplified 100 times.
posted by randomstriker at 4:22 AM on June 26, 2006


It's all fun and games until you end up looking like a 7 year old boy.
posted by sicem07 at 6:10 AM on June 26, 2006


well, my beautician seems to get more put-off when anyone under 18-years-old comes in for a brazilian. she gets really uncomfortable doing it for adolescents, like kids in high school...but could care less if you are a man, woman, or hermaphrodite, as long as you are of a legal age.

i dont know what ClarissaWAM is talking about...waxing definitely does not hurt or itch or irritate growing back.

btw, be prepared to spend about $80 USD on a complete waxing (plus a nice tip to compensate for the fact that someone had to stare-at and fondle your hairy sack for one hour). also be prepared to spend *at least* 1 hour (sometimes 2 or 3) getting brazilianed, as this is the length it usually takes to get all the hairs removed (pubes grow at the most unruly angle [leg hair, rather, grows all in one direction], so it makes it is very time-consuming.

don't worry about the rammifications on your sexuality from waxing your nuts because it is irrelevant. unless you go walking around town with your pants between your ankles, no one will know...
posted by naxosaxur at 7:14 AM on June 26, 2006


Go watch the waxing scene in "40-year old virgin", then imagine that pain amplified 100 times.

It's sort of silly to speculate as to the amount of pain another will experience if one has never been waxed oneself.
posted by pineapple at 1:05 PM on June 26, 2006


shave instead, regularly.
posted by exlotuseater at 6:38 PM on February 28, 2007


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