Tattoo ettiquete... in this economy
January 7, 2024 3:36 PM Subscribe
I'm looking for a bit of advice on how best to cancel with a tattoo artist who has asked for specifics on why I don't want to reschedule an appointment. Further details within.
About a month ago I booked with an artist to get a mid-sized tattoo (around 3.5x6) in early February. As of this week I've had to cancel that initial appointment due to genuine scheduling reasons (I got told last minute that I am finally getting a full pelvic/torso MRI for my endometriosis, so no fresh ink allowed), and the artist is attempting to re-book with me.
However, I don't think I want to re-book at all now. The cancellation made me lose around $200 in my deposit, which is fine. But, she doesn't roll over the deposit for reschedules even with weeks of notice, and that has made me truly reconsider if I want to recommit to this or move on.
Her work is beautiful, and she's friendly enough, but I don't think her pricing makes sense for me, and she has openly called me a "tight budget" client for having a limit of $875 (before tip and tax) for a simple neotraditional design of 2 birds in black and grey, with a very small pop of 1 colour (and it is based off a design she has already done). She also openly accepted my concept and budget, took my deposit, THEN said she'd have to significantly simplify the design and take 2 sessions to finish it.
I am totally in support of her charging what she would like to, but I also think this is very steep for what I'm asking for based on previous experience. This price would be the same as what I had paid for a highly detailed full-colour lower leg piece in 2019 (I get that inflation happened but... ouch).
I live in a small Canadian city, and it looks like finding any neotrad or trad artists charging under 220 an hour is almost impossible. The rates here seem much pricier than in major centres I've gotten tattooed in. If my old artist hadn't moved away I'd still be going to them, and they charge 1100 for a full day rate, so paying close to that for something barely the size of my hand feels wild.
But with the general mood of the tattoo community always being "pay up or f*ck off", I'm wondering how best to politely decline a reschedule in this situation, without risking getting blacklisted from local studios for flaking.
She's asked specifically if it's about the design (it's not), or if I am not serious about getting tattooed (no, already covered in them), so I'm not sure how I should put this to her.
I'd love to have her work on me, but the nickle-and-diming is making me worried that I'm not going to get her best work unless I'm willing to pay over a grand for a relatively small tat. It feels oddly scammy, but maybe I'm just behind the times here.
How would you word a gentle brush-off in this situation? Should I just ghost at this point since I paid my deposit and she didn't even draw up the design, just described it to me?
About a month ago I booked with an artist to get a mid-sized tattoo (around 3.5x6) in early February. As of this week I've had to cancel that initial appointment due to genuine scheduling reasons (I got told last minute that I am finally getting a full pelvic/torso MRI for my endometriosis, so no fresh ink allowed), and the artist is attempting to re-book with me.
However, I don't think I want to re-book at all now. The cancellation made me lose around $200 in my deposit, which is fine. But, she doesn't roll over the deposit for reschedules even with weeks of notice, and that has made me truly reconsider if I want to recommit to this or move on.
Her work is beautiful, and she's friendly enough, but I don't think her pricing makes sense for me, and she has openly called me a "tight budget" client for having a limit of $875 (before tip and tax) for a simple neotraditional design of 2 birds in black and grey, with a very small pop of 1 colour (and it is based off a design she has already done). She also openly accepted my concept and budget, took my deposit, THEN said she'd have to significantly simplify the design and take 2 sessions to finish it.
I am totally in support of her charging what she would like to, but I also think this is very steep for what I'm asking for based on previous experience. This price would be the same as what I had paid for a highly detailed full-colour lower leg piece in 2019 (I get that inflation happened but... ouch).
I live in a small Canadian city, and it looks like finding any neotrad or trad artists charging under 220 an hour is almost impossible. The rates here seem much pricier than in major centres I've gotten tattooed in. If my old artist hadn't moved away I'd still be going to them, and they charge 1100 for a full day rate, so paying close to that for something barely the size of my hand feels wild.
But with the general mood of the tattoo community always being "pay up or f*ck off", I'm wondering how best to politely decline a reschedule in this situation, without risking getting blacklisted from local studios for flaking.
She's asked specifically if it's about the design (it's not), or if I am not serious about getting tattooed (no, already covered in them), so I'm not sure how I should put this to her.
I'd love to have her work on me, but the nickle-and-diming is making me worried that I'm not going to get her best work unless I'm willing to pay over a grand for a relatively small tat. It feels oddly scammy, but maybe I'm just behind the times here.
How would you word a gentle brush-off in this situation? Should I just ghost at this point since I paid my deposit and she didn't even draw up the design, just described it to me?
She knows you cancelled for medical reasons? "This just isn't the right time" and let her imagine whatever she wants from that. If she seriously pushes back even against that, "I don't know when will be. I'll keep you in mind." Because at that point you certainly would keep all of this in mind, wow.
If she doesn't already know it was medical, then I'd consider sharing at least that it is, because it takes you from a potential flake to someone who's potentially dealing with a serious situation of unknown duration. I've had to cancel rather a lot of things over this past year for health stuff and people have been very understanding, even those whom I had to explicitly tell to just wait for me to contact them about rescheduling.
posted by teremala at 3:55 PM on January 7, 2024 [18 favorites]
If she doesn't already know it was medical, then I'd consider sharing at least that it is, because it takes you from a potential flake to someone who's potentially dealing with a serious situation of unknown duration. I've had to cancel rather a lot of things over this past year for health stuff and people have been very understanding, even those whom I had to explicitly tell to just wait for me to contact them about rescheduling.
posted by teremala at 3:55 PM on January 7, 2024 [18 favorites]
I agree that she sounds rude and a bit short-sighted. You don't owe her anything at this point, but if you want, you can say "circumstances have made me reconsider the timing of this tattoo. I need to put it on hold right now."
posted by hydra77 at 3:55 PM on January 7, 2024 [3 favorites]
posted by hydra77 at 3:55 PM on January 7, 2024 [3 favorites]
I'd go with something like, "I've had some medical stuff come up and I need to re-prioritize my budget. I'll let you know if I decide to move forward with this at a later time. Thanks!" No lies there, doesn't allow for details that aren't really any of her business, but doesn't burn the bridge either.
I've also had to be delicate in dealing with a tattoo artist, so I think I understand your concerns. My sense is that if the interaction doesn't feel good, then the art will always have a bit of a taint when you look at it. In my case I later decided to go with a completely different artist that I felt good about working with, and am very happy with that decision.
posted by Molasses808 at 3:58 PM on January 7, 2024 [31 favorites]
I've also had to be delicate in dealing with a tattoo artist, so I think I understand your concerns. My sense is that if the interaction doesn't feel good, then the art will always have a bit of a taint when you look at it. In my case I later decided to go with a completely different artist that I felt good about working with, and am very happy with that decision.
posted by Molasses808 at 3:58 PM on January 7, 2024 [31 favorites]
"As my cancellation is due to unanticipated medical issues, I'm unable to commit to a rescheduled date for the foreseeable future. I'll let you know if things change, no need to contact me."
posted by stormyteal at 4:52 PM on January 7, 2024 [14 favorites]
posted by stormyteal at 4:52 PM on January 7, 2024 [14 favorites]
going off the great responses-- I'd keep it without detail or apology.
"My circumstances have changed, this is not possible right now. But I will keep our discussions in mind if things change."
posted by calgirl at 4:57 PM on January 7, 2024 [2 favorites]
"My circumstances have changed, this is not possible right now. But I will keep our discussions in mind if things change."
posted by calgirl at 4:57 PM on January 7, 2024 [2 favorites]
Some good suggestions for phrasing from others, I’ll just add that the pricing does seem absurd for a tattoo of that size. (I’m used to closer to $150/hr.)
posted by gnutron at 5:24 PM on January 7, 2024 [1 favorite]
posted by gnutron at 5:24 PM on January 7, 2024 [1 favorite]
Yeah, no more detail here is needed beyond "The cancellation is for medical reasons, nothing to do with the art, and I just don't know when or if I'll be able to reschedule. I'll reach out in the future if I am able to move ahead with this."
And then feel free to never do that. Whether or not the pricing is reasonable in your area for this kind of work, it doesn't sound like you'll ever feel good about this ink from this person!
posted by Stacey at 5:26 PM on January 7, 2024 [7 favorites]
And then feel free to never do that. Whether or not the pricing is reasonable in your area for this kind of work, it doesn't sound like you'll ever feel good about this ink from this person!
posted by Stacey at 5:26 PM on January 7, 2024 [7 favorites]
she has openly called me a "tight budget" client
I have no ink and no knowledge of this industry, but this is really, really unprofessional. I agree with what Stacey said.
posted by jgirl at 7:07 PM on January 7, 2024 [12 favorites]
I have no ink and no knowledge of this industry, but this is really, really unprofessional. I agree with what Stacey said.
posted by jgirl at 7:07 PM on January 7, 2024 [12 favorites]
You’ve given her a month’s notice and she still wants to charge $200 to change the appointment date? You are beyond not owing her anything. The medical excuse seems fine.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 8:07 PM on January 7, 2024 [21 favorites]
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 8:07 PM on January 7, 2024 [21 favorites]
You’ve given her a month’s notice and she still wants to charge $200 to change the appointment date? You are beyond not owing her anything
My wife and I have a business (high end nail art) where if a client cancels for any reason, they can either pay full price for the service they booked or they will have to wait until the next time there is an opening, which at this point is probably never. That’s how busy we are. We haven’t even added a new name to the appointment waitlist for years. This artist might similarly busy.
But, sounds like is trying to fire you. Just tell her you won’t be rescheduling. It will likely be a win/win for both of you.
posted by Back At It Again At Krispy Kreme at 10:35 PM on January 7, 2024
My wife and I have a business (high end nail art) where if a client cancels for any reason, they can either pay full price for the service they booked or they will have to wait until the next time there is an opening, which at this point is probably never. That’s how busy we are. We haven’t even added a new name to the appointment waitlist for years. This artist might similarly busy.
But, sounds like is trying to fire you. Just tell her you won’t be rescheduling. It will likely be a win/win for both of you.
posted by Back At It Again At Krispy Kreme at 10:35 PM on January 7, 2024
I would give her honest feedback.
"I have a medical condition and my specialist scheduled a procedure which means that I cannot get a tattoo on the original planned date. I was going to reschedule, however I don't feel comfortable doing so since I have lost my original deposit despite giving plenty of notice."
posted by kinddieserzeit at 2:00 AM on January 8, 2024 [13 favorites]
"I have a medical condition and my specialist scheduled a procedure which means that I cannot get a tattoo on the original planned date. I was going to reschedule, however I don't feel comfortable doing so since I have lost my original deposit despite giving plenty of notice."
posted by kinddieserzeit at 2:00 AM on January 8, 2024 [13 favorites]
"Hey look, I've had some health stuff come up that's eating my funds and it's not fair on me or you to make another booking I may not be able to afford. I'd also rather not go into detail about my medical problems with you, but it's I can't put a firm date on when it'll stabilize so I'm not going to waste everyone's time and my money with a second deposit I may wind up cancelling on for reasons beyond my control. I'll keep you firmly in mind if this all changes, but for now we need to pull the plug on this."
I'm in Australia so the culture may be different, but I have had to reschedule larger and more complex pieces due to health reasons (covid for one and influenza for another, very unpredictable recovery times on both) and did not lose my deposit. It does seem strange to me that she'd want two deposits.
posted by Jilder at 3:08 AM on January 8, 2024 [2 favorites]
I'm in Australia so the culture may be different, but I have had to reschedule larger and more complex pieces due to health reasons (covid for one and influenza for another, very unpredictable recovery times on both) and did not lose my deposit. It does seem strange to me that she'd want two deposits.
posted by Jilder at 3:08 AM on January 8, 2024 [2 favorites]
"I have a medical condition and my specialist scheduled a procedure which means that I cannot get a tattoo on the original planned date. I was going to reschedule, however I don't feel comfortable doing so since I have lost my original deposit despite giving plenty of notice."
The outcome of this might be for her to offer to reapply your old deposit to a new booking, which I don't think you would like. I'd either just treat the old deposit as gone, or if you are going to ask for it back, make it clear that you want it back as clash rather than as a new deposit. If she has clear language on her site about deposits being non-refundable, I'd drop this as a question and consider it the cost of being able to walk away.
posted by Dip Flash at 6:36 AM on January 8, 2024
The outcome of this might be for her to offer to reapply your old deposit to a new booking, which I don't think you would like. I'd either just treat the old deposit as gone, or if you are going to ask for it back, make it clear that you want it back as clash rather than as a new deposit. If she has clear language on her site about deposits being non-refundable, I'd drop this as a question and consider it the cost of being able to walk away.
posted by Dip Flash at 6:36 AM on January 8, 2024
This is a hard sell and you do not owe a response. Not impressed with these business practices at all. The simplest way to respond is My plans have changed. once and then no further discussion.
posted by theora55 at 7:16 AM on January 8, 2024 [4 favorites]
posted by theora55 at 7:16 AM on January 8, 2024 [4 favorites]
If you want to be helpful and let her know that her policies are driving clients away while knowing that it probably won't make a difference:
"I need more scheduling flexibility than your deposit and refund policies allow for, so I can't go ahead with a rebooking and risk losing another deposit."
If you are not interested in helping someone who isn't helping you and don't mind blaming your medical situation:
"With my medical situation, I don't know when I might be able to get a fresh tattoo."
If you are not interested in helping someone who isn't helping you and would rather not make your medical situation her business:
"Unfortunately, I just don't know when I will be able to get another tattoo."
Which is pretty functionally equivalent to the Miss Manners approved 'no' of "I'm sorry, it's just not possible."
posted by jacquilynne at 7:30 AM on January 8, 2024 [2 favorites]
"I need more scheduling flexibility than your deposit and refund policies allow for, so I can't go ahead with a rebooking and risk losing another deposit."
If you are not interested in helping someone who isn't helping you and don't mind blaming your medical situation:
"With my medical situation, I don't know when I might be able to get a fresh tattoo."
If you are not interested in helping someone who isn't helping you and would rather not make your medical situation her business:
"Unfortunately, I just don't know when I will be able to get another tattoo."
Which is pretty functionally equivalent to the Miss Manners approved 'no' of "I'm sorry, it's just not possible."
posted by jacquilynne at 7:30 AM on January 8, 2024 [2 favorites]
My wife and I have a business (high end nail art) where if a client cancels for any reason, they can either pay full price for the service they booked or they will have to wait until the next time there is an opening, which at this point is probably never.
I do creative work for commercial clients and I have the exact same policy. If you book the time, you pay for it regardless. So I'm a bit more sympathetic to the tattoo artist here. As an independent practitioner her biggest constraint on her ability to make a stable living is the fact that there's only one of her and there's a limited amount of hours in the day. Cancellations are effectively the same thing as a pay cut. Artists or contractors in this situation have to try to carefully select the clients who are the most serious to avoid that, and some of the ways to do that are having non refundable deposits, strict scheduling policies, only taking on larger jobs, or charging higher than average rates. So I wouldn't worry about it! I don't think you really owe her an explanation because it's not personal - she's just busy and it sounds like it wasn't a good fit from the beginning.
posted by bradbane at 7:42 PM on January 8, 2024 [1 favorite]
I do creative work for commercial clients and I have the exact same policy. If you book the time, you pay for it regardless. So I'm a bit more sympathetic to the tattoo artist here. As an independent practitioner her biggest constraint on her ability to make a stable living is the fact that there's only one of her and there's a limited amount of hours in the day. Cancellations are effectively the same thing as a pay cut. Artists or contractors in this situation have to try to carefully select the clients who are the most serious to avoid that, and some of the ways to do that are having non refundable deposits, strict scheduling policies, only taking on larger jobs, or charging higher than average rates. So I wouldn't worry about it! I don't think you really owe her an explanation because it's not personal - she's just busy and it sounds like it wasn't a good fit from the beginning.
posted by bradbane at 7:42 PM on January 8, 2024 [1 favorite]
Unfortunately due to my medical issue, I won't be able to commit to another date. [I'm not sure when that will change.] I understand that I've forfeited my deposit.
I don't know when I'll be able to rebook. Right now it's too dicey with my medical issue. Not only with scheduling, but financially as well. Super bummed about how it's all shaking it though :/
Making another appointment isn't feasible right now. It would be disrespectful to your time and my budget.
I can't afford to take risks with my budget right now and my medical issue isn't under control yet, so I can't rebook and risk having to cancel again.
I understand and accept your deposit policy, but I just can't take the gamble right now!
posted by meemzi at 8:32 PM on January 8, 2024 [1 favorite]
I don't know when I'll be able to rebook. Right now it's too dicey with my medical issue. Not only with scheduling, but financially as well. Super bummed about how it's all shaking it though :/
Making another appointment isn't feasible right now. It would be disrespectful to your time and my budget.
I can't afford to take risks with my budget right now and my medical issue isn't under control yet, so I can't rebook and risk having to cancel again.
I understand and accept your deposit policy, but I just can't take the gamble right now!
posted by meemzi at 8:32 PM on January 8, 2024 [1 favorite]
This thread is closed to new comments.
I don't know about tattoos, but I use this excuse all the time even though I have plenty of money. Not being able to afford something doesn't mean you don't have the cash to pay for it, it means that it doesn't fit into your budget currently in a way that you find acceptable.
posted by Literaryhero at 3:49 PM on January 7, 2024 [45 favorites]