Village cat adopted me, should we spend noisy NYE somewhere else?
December 9, 2023 4:57 PM Subscribe
A friend offered their house. What'd be less annoying to kitty: freedom of movement on her home turf (there is no escape from the noise though), or being whisked away and having to spend the night with newly adopted human of 2-3 months, in a quiet but strange new house?
A wee, shy, malnourished village stray made friends with me in the fall season. Now freezing rain outside and there's a wee chonker in the making sleeping on a chair next to the heater (this chair now must never be moved, as I'm told). I'm worried about the upcoming purge night though, I mean New Years eve.
Btw I've done a lot of asking around to make sure I'm not stealing anyone's cat. But this question is driven by insane neighbours. Last NYE I walked 2km away before it got less noisy, around 3 or 4AM returned to the sight of 4 year old throwing unlicensed double strength fireworks and one drunk old guy sitting on the street alone shooting blanks every minute. It's really nice the rest of the year, I promise. The cat, also, is a true village cat who is smart and knows spots in barns and sheds and such.
My friend has offered that the cat can have the run of their house in another, much quieter village, and we can both sleep there. I read cats really hate being in unfamiliar territory, though. There's a decent amount of trust between me and the cat, who now stays every night, and lets me clean her paws from salt on the roads. But I've never caught / caged / transported her before (we've yet to do the first vet visit too). Thank you cat friends of Metafilter for reading all of this and for any advice you could spare. PS. cat tax
A wee, shy, malnourished village stray made friends with me in the fall season. Now freezing rain outside and there's a wee chonker in the making sleeping on a chair next to the heater (this chair now must never be moved, as I'm told). I'm worried about the upcoming purge night though, I mean New Years eve.
Btw I've done a lot of asking around to make sure I'm not stealing anyone's cat. But this question is driven by insane neighbours. Last NYE I walked 2km away before it got less noisy, around 3 or 4AM returned to the sight of 4 year old throwing unlicensed double strength fireworks and one drunk old guy sitting on the street alone shooting blanks every minute. It's really nice the rest of the year, I promise. The cat, also, is a true village cat who is smart and knows spots in barns and sheds and such.
My friend has offered that the cat can have the run of their house in another, much quieter village, and we can both sleep there. I read cats really hate being in unfamiliar territory, though. There's a decent amount of trust between me and the cat, who now stays every night, and lets me clean her paws from salt on the roads. But I've never caught / caged / transported her before (we've yet to do the first vet visit too). Thank you cat friends of Metafilter for reading all of this and for any advice you could spare. PS. cat tax
Best answer: My cats were not particularly bothered by New Years Eve fireworks and noise (in the way dogs tend to be). I think the transport and unfamiliar home would be much worse and you have a chance of the cat running off and you not being able to find it.
posted by vunder at 5:07 PM on December 9, 2023 [23 favorites]
posted by vunder at 5:07 PM on December 9, 2023 [23 favorites]
Best answer: Oh she looks so soft and her coat looks well cared for, you are doing a great job!
I think probably the best route here is to start her on a litter box right now and trap her in your home the night before or the morning-of. That way she will have had time to learn that there is a place for bathroom stuff in your home and her smells will be a lot stronger so it will feel like her territory a lot more and she is more likely to be calm inside for a day or two. Also of course if you are not already feeding her indoors, do so. Even the most adventurous of indoor/outdoor kitties like the option of staying in during things like storms and blizzards, and you can make your home the most comfortable option for her.
Yes, she is likely to be mad during the day when you won’t let her out, but it isn’t forever and I’d be more worried about drunk people being randomly cruel than her getting scared by the noises. Your home is safe and she already knows it, so outside noise is going to be less traumatic than being taken somewhere entirely new.
If you do decide to take off to this quieter village, don’t let her out of the house while you’re there either. She is much more likely to get lost and not be able to find her way back. So either way you’re dealing with a cat stuck inside, just one is a lot more drama and transport beforehand.
Later in her residency with you she may be a lovely travel cat, and it will be worth it to find out, but right now you’ve only been adopted for a few months and any kind of trapping or vets or transport is going to shake that foundation of trust a bit too much for seeing how she will behave once that trust is really set.
posted by Mizu at 5:21 PM on December 9, 2023 [15 favorites]
I think probably the best route here is to start her on a litter box right now and trap her in your home the night before or the morning-of. That way she will have had time to learn that there is a place for bathroom stuff in your home and her smells will be a lot stronger so it will feel like her territory a lot more and she is more likely to be calm inside for a day or two. Also of course if you are not already feeding her indoors, do so. Even the most adventurous of indoor/outdoor kitties like the option of staying in during things like storms and blizzards, and you can make your home the most comfortable option for her.
Yes, she is likely to be mad during the day when you won’t let her out, but it isn’t forever and I’d be more worried about drunk people being randomly cruel than her getting scared by the noises. Your home is safe and she already knows it, so outside noise is going to be less traumatic than being taken somewhere entirely new.
If you do decide to take off to this quieter village, don’t let her out of the house while you’re there either. She is much more likely to get lost and not be able to find her way back. So either way you’re dealing with a cat stuck inside, just one is a lot more drama and transport beforehand.
Later in her residency with you she may be a lovely travel cat, and it will be worth it to find out, but right now you’ve only been adopted for a few months and any kind of trapping or vets or transport is going to shake that foundation of trust a bit too much for seeing how she will behave once that trust is really set.
posted by Mizu at 5:21 PM on December 9, 2023 [15 favorites]
What Mizu said.
I would forge ahead and get the hard-sided cat carrier, the vet visit and the vaccinations taken care of. If Tuxedo Sam (or whatever the name is) decides to disappear during the holiday madness you will have pictures and proof of vaccination to backup your claim to ownership.
It's never going to be enjoyable to go to the vet. Just get in your routine now rather than later.
Gather up Sam's cat bed, food dish, litter box (and the usual litter!) and the favorite toys and treats. Be prepared to take a trip if needed.
The cat may be just fine with traveling. And it's better to get trained behavior established while the pet is young. Leash training is good, too.
This won't be the last time you and your debonair date need to travel. At least the cat is dressed for the occasion!
posted by TrishaU at 5:54 PM on December 9, 2023 [1 favorite]
I would forge ahead and get the hard-sided cat carrier, the vet visit and the vaccinations taken care of. If Tuxedo Sam (or whatever the name is) decides to disappear during the holiday madness you will have pictures and proof of vaccination to backup your claim to ownership.
It's never going to be enjoyable to go to the vet. Just get in your routine now rather than later.
Gather up Sam's cat bed, food dish, litter box (and the usual litter!) and the favorite toys and treats. Be prepared to take a trip if needed.
The cat may be just fine with traveling. And it's better to get trained behavior established while the pet is young. Leash training is good, too.
This won't be the last time you and your debonair date need to travel. At least the cat is dressed for the occasion!
posted by TrishaU at 5:54 PM on December 9, 2023 [1 favorite]
Don't travel. Keep her in your house and give her a few hidey-holes in case she gets stressed. She may be tougher than you think (and tougher than she looks, what a sweetie).
posted by nkknkk at 5:59 PM on December 9, 2023 [10 favorites]
posted by nkknkk at 5:59 PM on December 9, 2023 [10 favorites]
Yeah, I think travelling is the worst option, and attempting to get her used to an overnight in your home before then the best one.
posted by Stacey at 6:04 PM on December 9, 2023 [3 favorites]
posted by Stacey at 6:04 PM on December 9, 2023 [3 favorites]
Overnight in your home. Overnight in your home. I cannot image any good would come from snatching up a semi-feral cat, crating it, and taking it somewhere else.
posted by Lesser Shrew at 6:31 PM on December 9, 2023 [5 favorites]
posted by Lesser Shrew at 6:31 PM on December 9, 2023 [5 favorites]
I think it would be infinitely less stressful for the kitty to stay at home. Whether that’s the best thing for *you* however…
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 6:42 PM on December 9, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 6:42 PM on December 9, 2023 [1 favorite]
Cats hate changes in their environment. Mine have never been bothered by the noise of fireworks or outdoor shenanigans, ever. Moving them however... yeah, no. Another very strong +1 to leaving kitty at home. If at all possible though, since she's willing to come inside now, try and keep her inside overnight - that's what will keep her the absolute safest. Thanks for taking such good care of her!
posted by cgg at 7:00 PM on December 9, 2023 [10 favorites]
posted by cgg at 7:00 PM on December 9, 2023 [10 favorites]
Overnight in your home and turn the TV or radio up to help mask the sound from outside. You've got a few weeks so start getting her used to it now and she should be fine.
posted by platinum at 12:33 AM on December 10, 2023
posted by platinum at 12:33 AM on December 10, 2023
Response by poster: Thank you very much for all the responses, catvocates of Mefi! It was a real pleasure to wake up to all these helpful and thoughtful answers.
Sorry I should have mentioned that a litter box was provided as soon as Sam (let's call her so for now) started staying indoors at night (a friend said this would work without any training and it did)! Also, cat smells must by now be comfortingly spread all around the home. Food is being eaten indoors, we moved indoors bit by bit as the cold season set in, it was really cute.
I tally 2 answers for taking my new liege away from the village on NYE night, and 6 against... However most of the latter suggested "trap at home during NYE" which isn't one of the two options I have, as I maybe failed to highlight in my question.
I definitely didn't stress enough though how Sam is a country cat who is country tough. While there's obviously a domestic cat side which she's heavily indulging at present, Sam don't care if it gets -16C outside or whatever. When she wants out she'll go out. Pretty sure her fallback / first home is a barn with friendly goats, cows, sheep, chicken (you name it, some neighbours got it). That one time she really smelled of barn after getting in and she had a little bit of goat pee on her.
In conclusion, Sam has definitely moved into the house and made it her base, but I've noticed when there's a loud noise outside on the street her first instinct will be to run to an exit. Overnight being inside would be the worst of all, I'm sure.
Just to restate, NYE will make all of the inside of this house sound like it's being shelled for several hours.
I suppose, since the vet is overdue - even if just to make sure I didn't overlook an ID chip and someone is missing Sam - that'd be a good test as to whether I'm forgiven a bit of trapping-and-releasing. A cat carrier is already bought. I'll gauge the reaction to that. Also maybe I'll stay away for a night as well so she knows I'm sometimes away for a night and come back? Sucks to think of her waiting up though.
Thank you again for helping me think this through, I'll probably err on the side of not whisking her away for NYE based on how the outside is probably the safest-feeling for the cat at present.
posted by yoHighness at 2:10 AM on December 10, 2023 [3 favorites]
Sorry I should have mentioned that a litter box was provided as soon as Sam (let's call her so for now) started staying indoors at night (a friend said this would work without any training and it did)! Also, cat smells must by now be comfortingly spread all around the home. Food is being eaten indoors, we moved indoors bit by bit as the cold season set in, it was really cute.
I tally 2 answers for taking my new liege away from the village on NYE night, and 6 against... However most of the latter suggested "trap at home during NYE" which isn't one of the two options I have, as I maybe failed to highlight in my question.
I definitely didn't stress enough though how Sam is a country cat who is country tough. While there's obviously a domestic cat side which she's heavily indulging at present, Sam don't care if it gets -16C outside or whatever. When she wants out she'll go out. Pretty sure her fallback / first home is a barn with friendly goats, cows, sheep, chicken (you name it, some neighbours got it). That one time she really smelled of barn after getting in and she had a little bit of goat pee on her.
In conclusion, Sam has definitely moved into the house and made it her base, but I've noticed when there's a loud noise outside on the street her first instinct will be to run to an exit. Overnight being inside would be the worst of all, I'm sure.
Just to restate, NYE will make all of the inside of this house sound like it's being shelled for several hours.
I suppose, since the vet is overdue - even if just to make sure I didn't overlook an ID chip and someone is missing Sam - that'd be a good test as to whether I'm forgiven a bit of trapping-and-releasing. A cat carrier is already bought. I'll gauge the reaction to that. Also maybe I'll stay away for a night as well so she knows I'm sometimes away for a night and come back? Sucks to think of her waiting up though.
Thank you again for helping me think this through, I'll probably err on the side of not whisking her away for NYE based on how the outside is probably the safest-feeling for the cat at present.
posted by yoHighness at 2:10 AM on December 10, 2023 [3 favorites]
If you don't think indoors at your place that night is an option, then leave her alone in her territory. Taking her elsewhere still sounds like it would be much more upsetting for most cats.
posted by Stacey at 4:20 AM on December 10, 2023 [3 favorites]
posted by Stacey at 4:20 AM on December 10, 2023 [3 favorites]
Overnight being inside would be the worst of all, I'm sure.
you know her best, but I think it's pretty likely that if she had a few good hiding spots inside, she'd bolt to one of those and stay there for the duration. IMO this seems far safer than her bolting outside on a night when people all over may be letting off fireworks- she could just bolt further and further away until she's in unfamiliar territory. This is how most people lose their pets on fireworks nights.
Our cats are formerly ferals, and when we first got them they wanted to be outside when things were scary, but now that they live with us they come running inside when they hear fireworks. You've got to start somewhere with changing habits. A warm, dark, relatively more quiet spot than outside is likely to be preferable once your cat experiences it a few times. Put the radio on, give her multiple options for hiding spots. She's already beginning to show that she's more comfortable inside just by sleeping there. Don't turn her out on a scary night.
posted by oneirodynia at 4:12 PM on December 10, 2023 [5 favorites]
you know her best, but I think it's pretty likely that if she had a few good hiding spots inside, she'd bolt to one of those and stay there for the duration. IMO this seems far safer than her bolting outside on a night when people all over may be letting off fireworks- she could just bolt further and further away until she's in unfamiliar territory. This is how most people lose their pets on fireworks nights.
Our cats are formerly ferals, and when we first got them they wanted to be outside when things were scary, but now that they live with us they come running inside when they hear fireworks. You've got to start somewhere with changing habits. A warm, dark, relatively more quiet spot than outside is likely to be preferable once your cat experiences it a few times. Put the radio on, give her multiple options for hiding spots. She's already beginning to show that she's more comfortable inside just by sleeping there. Don't turn her out on a scary night.
posted by oneirodynia at 4:12 PM on December 10, 2023 [5 favorites]
Response by poster: I am grateful for your sharing from direct experience with having adopted strays. If mine is still at the "running outside when things are scary" stage it isn't a habit I'd be confident I can change in one night (at primetime as well).
Since you're doubling down when I already said in house wasn't an option. No, really. I don't care about policing this ask but, seriously. This house won't be fit for habitation of either cat or human on NYE. No quieter spot in the back. A level of noise like you wouldn't or perhaps rather can't seem to imagine (oh you sweet summer child etc.) If only you knew how ludicrous the suggestion of putting on the radio is. That is from the start the premise of this ask, and I even restated it. So please try to take it at face value. I appreciate though it may be useful advice for others in this situation coming across this ask, where the situation is perhaps less extreme. Also definitely still thank you (and I favourited your well written comment and I appreciate you took the time to share your experience)!
posted by yoHighness at 11:29 AM on December 11, 2023
Since you're doubling down when I already said in house wasn't an option. No, really. I don't care about policing this ask but, seriously. This house won't be fit for habitation of either cat or human on NYE. No quieter spot in the back. A level of noise like you wouldn't or perhaps rather can't seem to imagine (oh you sweet summer child etc.) If only you knew how ludicrous the suggestion of putting on the radio is. That is from the start the premise of this ask, and I even restated it. So please try to take it at face value. I appreciate though it may be useful advice for others in this situation coming across this ask, where the situation is perhaps less extreme. Also definitely still thank you (and I favourited your well written comment and I appreciate you took the time to share your experience)!
posted by yoHighness at 11:29 AM on December 11, 2023
Oh, I thought she was entirely an indoor kitty at this point. If she's comfortable outside then don't worry about her -- she's already got hidey holes for scary times. Having her choose to come into the house would be a compliment.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 11:48 AM on December 11, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 11:48 AM on December 11, 2023 [1 favorite]
A level of noise like you wouldn't or perhaps rather can't seem to imagine (oh you sweet summer child etc.)
I live in Oakland, California. This is the 4th of July. This is my block. And there is literally nothing in your question that says the house isn't an option- I've only just figured out now that you meant this line in your follow-up "trap at home during NYE" which isn't one of the two options I have meant that you couldn't secure her at home at all- not put in a box or small room or confine in a trap of some sort. Sorry to respond when that wasn't clear, and I hope she returns when you do.
posted by oneirodynia at 4:54 PM on December 11, 2023 [1 favorite]
I live in Oakland, California. This is the 4th of July. This is my block. And there is literally nothing in your question that says the house isn't an option- I've only just figured out now that you meant this line in your follow-up "trap at home during NYE" which isn't one of the two options I have meant that you couldn't secure her at home at all- not put in a box or small room or confine in a trap of some sort. Sorry to respond when that wasn't clear, and I hope she returns when you do.
posted by oneirodynia at 4:54 PM on December 11, 2023 [1 favorite]
Knowing that you can't keep her inside at home, I am also changing my answer. At some point this cat was abandoned- or left a former barn, outbuilding or home because their situation became untenable in some way*. Maybe there's a new dog at the farm, or a litter of teenage foxes, or a mean human in the place they formerly spent their time. At any rate, an independent cat is going to choose to stay where they feel the most safe, which clearly isn't a hay rick or someone's shed- it's your house, with you. The assumption that if you turn them out on New Years Eve that whatever they formerly had to go to 1) still exists and/or 2) feels safe, warm and comfortable is not borne out by the fact that they don't go there anymore.
If you can't bear to be in your own home that night, then outside certainly must be worse- not to mention cold and possibly wet, if you live in the northern hemisphere. Imagine after four months of safety and comfort being turned out on a night like you describe. Take her with you and keep her in one room.
*Socialized cats must have some human contact as kittens if they are to grow up with any trust of people at all.
posted by oneirodynia at 6:21 PM on December 11, 2023 [1 favorite]
If you can't bear to be in your own home that night, then outside certainly must be worse- not to mention cold and possibly wet, if you live in the northern hemisphere. Imagine after four months of safety and comfort being turned out on a night like you describe. Take her with you and keep her in one room.
*Socialized cats must have some human contact as kittens if they are to grow up with any trust of people at all.
posted by oneirodynia at 6:21 PM on December 11, 2023 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: Shortly after my last comment in here, the cat disappeared.
Spoiler: it's all good now post NYE. But Apologies: in the meantime I couldn't even bear to go back to this thread. Then, after 10 days, kitty scratched the window one late night and seemed thrilled to be back, at least it was a stormy and extended greeting with headbutts and a lot of talking though she's usually curt. Maybe it was just "snap out of it and stop happy crying I am STARVED" anyway in the days after, just, business as usual.
Then on NYE, I was gonna wait for as long as the cat wanted to stay inside. The cat ran out of the house at the very first tiny kid's firecracker at around 3PM, I left an hour later and returned in the morning with the cat waiting already. There's been some eating, grooming, getting scritches and short nap before heading out again.
So, I don't believe it but on coming back today I bumped into that one elusive neighbour I never managed to talk to while asking around about the cat. He was sweeping leftover fireworks rubbish from the street, he himself hadn't bought any he said. It turns out that guy has been doing basic care for the cat - a bit of food and on one occasion medicine - but without capacity or desire to take her in. Though the previous owner, whom the cat ran away from, and who hasn't sterilised her btw. "keeps saying" to the guy he should take the cat in. ( ... let's not harsh 2024 first thing by saying any more about that ). The cat who has adopted me was indeed a barn cat scared off by the farm dog. I now have the complete backstory and cleared any traces of doubt I can adopt her without stealing her. It's still a freecat who owns herself and is half-home outside, though I will give her the official papers and the chip (it'll protect her from farmers here if anything), and forever house privileges.
Thanks for posting examples of 4th of July, hey, your street looks like mine. Damn. Here's an example compilation video of the kind of the illegal fireworks people enjoy here in the countryside.
Apologies also that I hadn't realised my question wasn't worded clearly enough with regards to the house being N/A. Thank you all very much again and a catful 2024 to you.
posted by yoHighness at 5:35 AM on January 1
Spoiler: it's all good now post NYE. But Apologies: in the meantime I couldn't even bear to go back to this thread. Then, after 10 days, kitty scratched the window one late night and seemed thrilled to be back, at least it was a stormy and extended greeting with headbutts and a lot of talking though she's usually curt. Maybe it was just "snap out of it and stop happy crying I am STARVED" anyway in the days after, just, business as usual.
Then on NYE, I was gonna wait for as long as the cat wanted to stay inside. The cat ran out of the house at the very first tiny kid's firecracker at around 3PM, I left an hour later and returned in the morning with the cat waiting already. There's been some eating, grooming, getting scritches and short nap before heading out again.
So, I don't believe it but on coming back today I bumped into that one elusive neighbour I never managed to talk to while asking around about the cat. He was sweeping leftover fireworks rubbish from the street, he himself hadn't bought any he said. It turns out that guy has been doing basic care for the cat - a bit of food and on one occasion medicine - but without capacity or desire to take her in. Though the previous owner, whom the cat ran away from, and who hasn't sterilised her btw. "keeps saying" to the guy he should take the cat in. ( ... let's not harsh 2024 first thing by saying any more about that ). The cat who has adopted me was indeed a barn cat scared off by the farm dog. I now have the complete backstory and cleared any traces of doubt I can adopt her without stealing her. It's still a freecat who owns herself and is half-home outside, though I will give her the official papers and the chip (it'll protect her from farmers here if anything), and forever house privileges.
Thanks for posting examples of 4th of July, hey, your street looks like mine. Damn. Here's an example compilation video of the kind of the illegal fireworks people enjoy here in the countryside.
Apologies also that I hadn't realised my question wasn't worded clearly enough with regards to the house being N/A. Thank you all very much again and a catful 2024 to you.
posted by yoHighness at 5:35 AM on January 1
What a roller coaster!
So amazing that you finally met the person who was previously keeping an eye out for her. Did you get his contact information? Community cats need the whole community!
I hope by this time next year you two can pack up and spend new years in a peaceful place, happy in each others’ company. Start introducing her to a carrier now, with a soft towel inside of it and giving her treats in there. Thank you for the update, I was thinking of this Ask yesterday.
posted by Mizu at 9:36 AM on January 1 [1 favorite]
So amazing that you finally met the person who was previously keeping an eye out for her. Did you get his contact information? Community cats need the whole community!
I hope by this time next year you two can pack up and spend new years in a peaceful place, happy in each others’ company. Start introducing her to a carrier now, with a soft towel inside of it and giving her treats in there. Thank you for the update, I was thinking of this Ask yesterday.
posted by Mizu at 9:36 AM on January 1 [1 favorite]
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posted by yoHighness at 5:02 PM on December 9, 2023