Help benchmark my grocery spending
November 15, 2023 10:54 AM   Subscribe

My wife and toddler in my mind have a crazy high grocery outlay, which averages to around $900 a month to feed around 75% of all our meals (rest is at daycare, takeout or eating at restaurants) If you have one small child, live in a high COLA and eat most meals at home, and you keep track of spending pretty diligently, what do you spend and how do you spend it?

We do eat meat/seafood, but no more than 15% of that total is meat. We have literally no food restrictions, but I'd say we throw away 10-15% of our food. (In NYC our grocery outlay was $250 a month though there was just two of us, we were vegetarian at home and ate 50+% of meals out.)
posted by sandmanwv to Work & Money (35 answers total) 8 users marked this as a favorite
 
Best answer: The USDA releases a monthly food costs report which I've found very useful for benchmarking food costs. It has figures for a "low-cost", "moderate", and "liberal" spending level, with averages by age range and gender. Note that for a 3-person household you'll need to increase the total by 5% (since this report is based on a 4-person household, and you don't get some of the bulk buying benefits in a smaller household). I costed out a monthly budget based on the most recent numbers for a household of 3 consisting of (as an example) one child between 2-3 years of age, one male between 19-50 years of age, and one female between 19-50 years of age, and here's what I got:
- Low-cost - $759.05/month
- Moderate - $933.87/month
- Liberal - $1154.16/month

In short: (1) it looks like your family is right on pace, and (2) it's not your wife's fault that food costs are bananas right now. I hope this is a useful tool for you in future!
posted by ourobouros at 11:07 AM on November 15, 2023 [52 favorites]


This tracks with our family as well (four year old) - we spend on average $230/week at the grocery store and about $150/month on grocery items from other stores, plus a bit more for toiletries and meds we don't buy at the grocery store.

Food inflation has been incredibly high the last couple of years so every bill feels impossibly higher than it used to be for similar items. We have cut back on meat and fish so arguably that $230/week is buying less than it did about three years ago.
posted by openhearted at 11:14 AM on November 15, 2023 [4 favorites]


Our household of three (two adults + preschooler) budgets just over $1000 a month for "groceries and supplies" in a VHCOL area. We eat pescetarian, primarily but not exclusively organic. We could lower this amount but it's not worth our time.
posted by muddgirl at 11:14 AM on November 15, 2023 [1 favorite]


I feel you. Two adults, one toddler in my household, too. I've reduced grocery spending in a few ways.
1. Price sheet. If you shop at more than one store, or have the option for multiple grocery stores, is there a store that has better prices? Do you have brand loyalty and are willing to spend more for that or would you compromise and buy the store brand instead? With the price sheet, you'll know if a sale is good and you should e.g. buy several cans of the fire roasted tomatoes you like or if brand X's fantastic sale still leaves it twice the price of brand Y.
2. Menu planning and eating leftovers. I make a rough outline of what we're eating throughout the week with some flexibility for nights when everything goes sideways or my mother-in-law ends up eating with us. I either plan to use leftovers as another meal or use them for lunches. This helps cut down on leftovers going into the compost.
3. Aldi. Not to sound like an ad, but damn their prices are low. They opened a store in my town, so I gave them a shot and tried out the house brands and have overall been really pleased. There are some things I tried and decided I'd rather spend a little more on something I like more, but overall, it's been great.
posted by carrioncomfort at 11:19 AM on November 15, 2023 [2 favorites]


Aldi. Not to sound like an ad, but damn their prices are low

This but for Walmart groceries. They are rock-bottom cheap.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 11:21 AM on November 15, 2023 [3 favorites]


Just went through my credit card statement for October and it included $1187 spent at grocery stores (Whole Foods, Trader Joe's, and Publix) for a household of three adults in South Florida. (The "liberal" USDA numbers came in at $1255 for three people our ages and genders so I guess we're more or less on track with that.) Things have gone up so ridiculously in the past couple of years, I'm astonished every time I go to the checkout.
posted by Daily Alice at 11:23 AM on November 15, 2023


Groceries + restaurant + bulk household supplies for my family of 1 adult and 1.5 teenagers* came to $950 last month.

I shopped at Walmart, a south asian grocery store, and Trader Joe's (in order of frequency); we ate out 6 times last month: twice fast food, twice at chain restaurants, twice at "real" restaurants.

We live in an MCOL area, I'm budget conscious but could shave about $200 off that total if I really needed to.

*Average. I actually have two teens but they live with me every other week, plus there's two other teens who eat here 2 days every week.
posted by MiraK at 11:49 AM on November 15, 2023


As a lot of people are pointing out, food is just more expensive these days in general.

But you've asked for practical advice. The fact that you're throwing away 10% of what you buy jumped out at me - maybe something to combat the food waste might help? I know that my own food costs went WAY down when I started doing weekly meal planning before grocery shopping each week; my plan isn't a regimented "plan" so much as it's a list of potential meals I can make using what's in the house, using up the stuff that really needs using up first. I buy only what I still need for those meals each week.

I'm also getting a lot smarter about food waste in general - in one of my own AskMe's someone recommended a cookbook called Perfectly Good Food, and it is FANTASTIC - it give you ideas for stuff you can make out of sort-of-old foodstuffs, and gives you clear advice about "THIS is officially the point at which your produce should be thrown out, but if it's just like THAT, you can still do something with it."

And if you can make a batch of muffins out of the couple of tired apples in your fruit bowl instead of throwing them away, then that's money you don't have to spend on snacks.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 11:54 AM on November 15, 2023 [14 favorites]


IMO you're doing pretty well (as discussed by others above), but one resource I can point to is BudgetBytes when you're thinking about recipes and planning shopping.
posted by aramaic at 11:55 AM on November 15, 2023 [4 favorites]


If you’re not doing the shopping right now, I recommend you go a few times - my spouse hadn’t gone in a while and it was eye-opening for him.

My advice a bit counter to others’ but when my kids were little and in daycare I spent a lot of time on keeping our food costs low by doing the making, making stock and soups and washing our own lettuce and things. It all worked out but older me would say to spend a little more and sleep more, because in a couple of years it gets so much easier.
posted by warriorqueen at 12:11 PM on November 15, 2023 [15 favorites]


Our most recent attempt to lower our grocery bill has been to order all non-perishable items through Walmart curbside pickup. (We don't usually shop at Walmart...but it has helped vs. other grocery store prices.)
posted by gnutron at 12:32 PM on November 15, 2023 [1 favorite]


We live on Long Island (HCOL), and I do most of the shopping and almost all of the cooking, so I have a pretty good handle on the grocery expenditures. We eat probably 50ish meals at home each week, which usually means one or two meals out and school lunch most days for the kid (9).

I'm super frugal about groceries -- meat only when it's on sale, mostly generic products, very little packaged food -- and we spend about $600-650 a month on groceries and household supplies. The flip side of that is that the HCOL means the one or two meals out each week wind up costing just about as much (tallying that up was eye opening, but also not entirely surprising).

It puts us pretty much in line with the USDA guidelines, but we could spend an awful lot less if all we did was strictly cut back to one meal out each week. That said, we are fairly light eaters, and I am frugal almost to a fault when I shop (if it's not either a generic staple or on a very good sale, it's not going into the cart; when I find something on sale that will freeze or otherwise keep, I buy it in bulk).
posted by uncleozzy at 12:33 PM on November 15, 2023 [2 favorites]


I've got two adults, a young kid, and a baby. We spend between $125-175 a week on grocery shopping, and supplement with approximately 1 night a week eating out or take out, and (for me) occasional lunch at work. We're in an area that used to be lower cost, but is inching up, and in the average ish range. We...

-Meal plan religiously. Almost everything we buy has an end goal.
-Eat relatively little meat, and when we do, eat cheaper cuts (whole legs/drumsticks, ground turkey, etc.)
-Shop at the lower cost grocery store
-Mostly buy generic dry goods

We also supplement in the summer with a CSA share that works out to about $20 a week, plus occasional treats from local businesses. Our state has relatively liberal homestead laws, so there are a bunch of folks who do little subscription boxes of baked goods, chocolates, whatever, so those also play into the food costs. So we're not getting the fanciest stuff from the grocery store, but, say $25 extra a week occasionally gets us really nice produce and chocolates.
posted by damayanti at 12:48 PM on November 15, 2023


Response by poster: FYI to add, our household supplies a month is another $150, our restaurant expenditure is like $700. (I am not counting that here). I do almost all the shopping and cooking.
posted by sandmanwv at 12:58 PM on November 15, 2023 [1 favorite]


Are you more concerned by their level of consumption or by the cost of things? Seems like if you do the shopping you're aware of the costs, so are there items there that you think they are eating too much of or don't need? or are you just gut checking how expensive things have gotten?
posted by greta simone at 1:13 PM on November 15, 2023 [3 favorites]


It averages to about $1.33 per meal per person.

I get $13.33. ($900/(30 days x 3 people x 0.75))

That strikes me as high, especially since it incorporates breakfast, but whether it's too high for you we can't answer. It depends on how much you value whatever you're buying vs. our typical dinner of, for example, frozen ravioli with jarred tomato sauce and some frozen vegetables, which is about $2-$3 per person.

Also, Aldi.
posted by Mr.Know-it-some at 1:33 PM on November 15, 2023 [1 favorite]


I get $13.33. ($900/(30 days x 3 people x 0.75))
You forgot to include meals/day. $900/(30 days × 3 people × 3 meals/day × .75) = $4.44/meal/person.

For my household of 3 in a very high-cost US city, cooking most meals at home, we currently spend an average of $1200/month in grocery stores and farmer’s markets, and $300/month in restaurants. That’s a total of $500/person/month, or $16.67/person/day, or $5.55/person/meal.

Like you, our food costs have increased a lot in recent years. We could cut costs if necessary by changing some shopping and eating habits.
posted by mbrubeck at 1:47 PM on November 15, 2023 [4 favorites]


We're a family of 4 (2 adults, 1 male teen, 1 woman teen) in a HCOL area. We spend about 1k a month in food. I've reduced costs in dining out to just one night a week of takeout .

I plan meals around sales. I also keep my freezer full of quick frozen meals from Costco.

I also pick up ground beef and chicken breasts when they're on Tuesday sale at Fresh Market.

I do a lot of my quick shopping at Publix, due to it being nice to shop there, even though it is spendier. I also go there because the prescriptions are cheaper.

I do Kroger pickup 1-2x a month. Ordering online allows me to avoid spontaneous urges and it's free to have them shop for me.

I drop into Lidl and Trader Joe's for a few items here and there.
posted by heathrowga at 2:28 PM on November 15, 2023


I would love to help more if you can clarify what would help?

My family is 3 adults, one early teen and one late teen. We don’t eat out much, and currently in Toronto we’re spending about $1k/month, but that is with:
- meal planning
- I make our own bread etc
- mostly vegetarian
- but we pay for lactose-free milk in teen boy quantities
- we get vegetables delivered doing the growing season that are not certified organic but cost a bit more than shopping on sale
- we celebrate with special meals with fancier ingredients and buy things like cannoli

Like some of this depends on your needs.
posted by warriorqueen at 3:01 PM on November 15, 2023 [1 favorite]


I just did the math for October, and my two adult, no kids household in Los Angeles spent about $1150 on all food and household goods. That breaks down to about $300 in take-out and $700 in normal groceries/household goods, plus $150 in medically-necessary “extra” foodstuffs (protein powder & shakes, electrolyte packets). We primarily shop online at Target and in-person at Ralphs and Marukai, supplemented by orders from a twice-monthly produce box, Nuts.com, Rancho Gordo, and sometimes Costco.

We are not particularly frugal food shoppers (we only vaguely meal plan, buy regardless of sales, get the specific brands we want) but I will admit I gasped at the idea of throwing away 10-15% of the food you buy. We throw away… maybe two vegetables a month? Our default strategy for choosing what to cook is to start with whatever is next to go bad, and even just as an ad hoc method it works pretty well.

Other relevant factors: we are vegetarian. We buy almost all shelf-stable goods from Target (using free shipping and a Target credit card for an automatic 5% back). We order a small subset of items from Costco (we don’t have space for bulk packages of most things, and the shipping inventory is small and inconsistent, but the membership pays for itself just in the discount on OTC meds). We cook mostly from scratch and mostly in large quantities, eat leftovers for a few days, and freeze the rest (which probably cuts back on both ingredient waste and desperation take-out). And even though sales don’t dictate what we buy, if there does happen to be a good sale we will spend a little more up-front to take advantage of it.
posted by CtrlAltDelete at 5:17 PM on November 15, 2023 [1 favorite]


In my experience having a toddler generates quite a bit of food waste, so take into account that will hopefully only last a few years before they're eating more regularly.

Beyond that I have noticed some people don't like to eat or plan to eat leftovers. My in-laws seem to think food only lasts 24 hours in the fridge. I eat leftovers nearly every day for lunch, or if I'm solo parenting I will have leftovers for dinner. Having a designated Leftovers Day once or twice a week can really reduce food waste.
posted by muddgirl at 7:13 PM on November 15, 2023 [1 favorite]


If you want to bring the costs down, try to identify the problem first, and look for ways to change that, ideally as a family unit, with everyone having a say.

(Btw, on the off chance that you're here just to find confirmation that your wife and kid are doing something wrong and you hope to tell them they're doing it wrong and everything then magically rearranges according to your wishes - you're in the wrong place.)

Is the problem food waste? Food prices? Buying expensive food? Bad planning? It's a bit harder with a toddler, as there's more food waste until they start eating more like an adult (for us the turning point was around 5yo), but you can still try to change something and see where it goes.

But also, food is just getting more expensive every day - I've literally seen a price increase in my staples every time I go into the store.
posted by gakiko at 12:07 AM on November 16, 2023 [1 favorite]


Just to chime in with another data point. Two adults and a nine year old living in Chicago, we have an average of $1,249.40 spend on groceries for 2023. This is food alone, not including regular household supplies, personal care supplies, etc. Last few years averages per month:

- 2023 - $1,249.40
- 2022 - $1,207.90
- 2021 - $1,242.42
- 2020 - $1,092.28

I'm fine with it, it doesn't seem lavish. We eat the vast majority of meals at home.
posted by corpse at 3:48 AM on November 16, 2023


I would love to help more if you can clarify what would help?

Same here - but adding that I have a feeling that maybe you don't know what WOULD help at this stage. So that's probably why you're seeing some "identify the problem first" suggestions -

* The prices of food in general can vary from store to store and from city to city and from brand to brand.
* There are things you can make at home for cheaper on average than you can buy them. You may have to invest an initial outlay in some staples, but they were staples you can use for a lot of other things anyway.
* Meal planning can save you from the last-minute panicked rush to the grocery store because you've decided you want X for dinner that night but you don't have the ingredients.

And on and on.

All of these ideas might help - but not all of them might fit in your lifestyle. We can tell you that you can save money by baking your own bread, but if you're like "there is NO fucking way I'm going to be baking my own bread from scratch since both parents work", then that's ABSOLUTELY valid. Or, "look, my kid's going through a phase where the expensive dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets are the only acceptable foodstuff" - that's also valid.

So - maybe if you could give us some more detail about whether you have the bandwidth and skillset to try DIY'ing your own food more, or if you've tried planning meals out. Or whether you want to try freezer meals (there are a shit-ton of "freezer meal" plans where someone goes to Costco or something like that once a month, spends the whole weekend cooking, and then divvies things up among a whole lot of freezer-safe containers, and then they live off the pre-made freezer meals for a whole month).

I suggested looking at the food waste earlier because it jumped out at me - for some reason 10% seems high. Granted, it used to be my own rate, but that's largely because I'm regularly FLOODED with produce from a CSA, and I'm only trying to feed one adult; until I got in the habit of freezing my own stuff, I was also having to discard some things simply because I was not eating them fast enough. I still have been working on cutting down on food waste, and it's starting to have a definite impact - I've been freezing more of what I take in if I know I won't eat it all, and that saves it for later and keeps me from having to buy frozen peas in the winter or whatever.

Our point is - the CAUSE of this problem may not be as obvious, and there may not be a single one weird trick that will fix this. But that's GOOD news, because that makes it more likely you can find the thing that works for your own unique family.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:49 AM on November 16, 2023


I'm shocked. I literally cannot imagine how it could cost that much a month to feed three people, one of whom is small.

Do you utilize leftovers at all? It doesn't mean eating the same thing again. For example, we might make a pork roast, eat it with mashed potatoes and a veggie, and then use the leftover pork in an Asian noodle preparation.
posted by tiny frying pan at 5:03 AM on November 16, 2023


I'd start by looking at what you are throwing out and find a pattern there.

A couple of things are most likely. One is that you are buying fresh meat, fish or produce because they are healthy and then real life intervenes and organization issues happen and you don't get to that lettuce before it goes manky and has to be tossed. If that is the case cut way back on fresh food and replace it with barely processed frozen food instead. Try buying only fresh salad veggies. Anything you don't eat raw can maybe come out of the freezer. When stir frying frozen vegetables, don't cook them, just defrost them in the hot pan on top of the protein so that they retain some crispness.

The other possibility is that life with a toddler requires so many contingencies that your organization is being torpedoed. You were supposed to eat the beef on Monday, with leftovers on Tuesday, but because you were running on Toddler time you got home too late to cook the beef Monday night, so you cooked it Wednesday, and Thursday morning, your spouse, desperate to not have to buy a lunch made half the leftovers into sandwiches, and the portion that was left wasn't enough for a family meal, so it got neglected until it went bad.

Some of that is unavoidable and some of that can be dealt with by improving your organization.

I'm more concerned with this: My wife and toddler in my mind have a crazy high grocery outlay when paired with I do almost all the shopping and cooking. If you do almost all the shopping and cooking than you are the one spending the money on their food and there is a disconnect there. Something else is going on. Are you, perhaps, buying food that they end up not eating? Or are you starting to find yourself over burdened by the thought of providing for them? I think you need to unpack why you feel that it's your wife and toddler who have a crazy high grocery outlay but you do personally do not.

Sometimes other people eat differently than we do, and their diets cost way more money than ours do. I live with someone whose food intake costs almost double the cost of what the other two of us cost. This is not a good situation, but it is what it is. He's a diabetic and he's not gaining weight, so if he eats less he would be losing it. In our case we have to live with it. I get an unpleasant window into how well managed his blood sugars are by how fast he cleans out the freezer and the pantry.

If the issue troubling you is that you are eating rice and beans and they are eating chicken and fresh vegetables, and resenting that anxiety and prudence is preventing you from also eating chicken and fresh vegetables, then you have a problem that combines the relationship with the budget. If they are eating whatever they can find and that is putting paid to your meal planning, as when your wife makes half of tonight's dinner into her own lunch, then you may be able to alleviate the problem with better organization. But if you are starting to have food anxiety and be trying to control the kitchen and make all the choices about what other people get to eat, then that's a different problem, and the issue is managing your anxiety, not the food.

I'm not saying that anxiety is misplaced tho. Food is crazy expensive and the number of people that are food insecure is appalling. For an example, a recent report said that one in ten people in Toronto is resorting to visiting food banks. Fear of sliding into their situation is enough to keep a great many of us awake at night.
posted by Jane the Brown at 5:34 AM on November 16, 2023 [9 favorites]


If you do all the shopping and cooking, why is it your wife and toddler that have a high grocery outlay? Is the toddler blackmailing you to get the fancy snacks?

We fall in the USDA "liberal" range for 2 adults no kids. Anecdatally, we left Los Angeles in September 2022 and have been slowmading since then - 5 months in Oregon and then stints in Colorado, Wisconsin, upstate New York, and now Vermont. And that means we are generally not maintaining a fully-stocked pantry, and while we're definitely not on a sandwich-only diet I'm no longer doing big experiments or "fun" cooking. I am largely cooking the same 10 or so recipes with variations in flavor profiles. I only buy a couple of fresh produce items anymore. Zucchini and brussels sprouts are pretty guaranteed to get eaten, most other vegetables come frozen. Salad stuff is probably my biggest party foul - we mean to eat it, but we do not always finish it before it goes bad.

And this is costing me more every month, and at this point costs nearly twice what it cost 15 months ago in LA. Even adjusting for the substantial benefit of being close to Aldi and Smart & Final there, and the general decentness of quality and price on produce in California, I'm seeing the per-pound price of almost every one of our staple items (and I mean like the same deli meat, bread, chicken, frozen vegetables, salad basics, coffee, canned tomatoes, cheese) go up. It's actually dramatically obvious here in Vermont, where I'm in a little town 25 minutes from a slightly larger town in New Hampshire where the Walmart is and sales tax isn't. Staple items here in town are sometimes 30-40% higher than at Walmart or the Shaws across the street from Walmart.

Shit's expensive, and it's getting worse. If you feel you are overspending on variety/novelty, try things Lyn Style for a couple months, eating more or less the same meals with some amount of meal plan/prep and cooking for leftovers, fairly simple meals with max 5 components, and see if your "overage" is going to stuff you actually could do without or if it's just ridiculously expensive to exist right now.
posted by Lyn Never at 6:48 AM on November 16, 2023 [1 favorite]


I spend about 300-350/month (CAD) for myself and shared custody of a toddler (who is eating less snacks and more regular meals now). I believe this is quite low for my area - I'm in a medium-high COL city and food prices are high overall in Canada. I strictly eat all meals at home now. Last year we spent an average of 775/mth for 2 adults and a young toddler (being fairly frugal but less than I am now, and buying a lot of toddler pouches and snacks and frozen convenience food then, and about 50$/month of that was for the splurge of local beef, which I no longer buy). We also spent an additional ~150/mth on fast food then.

Things that help keep my grocery bill low:

I'm a very careful shopper with sales and have a good mental memory of what a "normal" or "good sale" price is for my usual grocery items. If something feels too expensive to me, I usually wait to buy it later or elsewhere. If something is very cheap, I'll plan a meal with it, buy extra to freeze, etc. This is something of a special interest/hobby for me and most people don't have the time or mental interest to do it to the extent that I do, but everyone can save a lot by focusing on the more expensive items that you use regularly and buying them only on sale, in amounts that will last you until the next sale (e.g. cheese I don't buy above 5$, boneless skinless chicken I don't buy above 11$/kg and ideally less, though I haven't seen the formerly lowest sale price of 8.80/kg in several years). I will also wait to get an item at a different store later if it seems overpriced (for example canned beans are 1$ at some stores and 2.50 at others, which is ridiculous).

There are some things I never buy out of season because the price is just too much for me (I refuse to spend 4$ on a tiny box of raspberries, but will buy huge quantities when they're 2$).

Meal planning/batch cooking could save me money but my brain doesn't work well with it so I rarely do it, but I do try to cook enough for at least one day of leftovers and ideally a few days (sometimes freezing a bit of it). I LOVE having leftovers - it means no cooking that day! Awesome!

I try really hard not to waste food by rotting or toddler not eating it - I'll give small portions at a time and often save or eat the leftovers myself if they're barely touched.

On the other hand, I sometimes splurge on foods I really like - tropical fruit, cheese, pastries, fancy bread, etc etc so if I wanted to remove this source of joy from my life and had no other choice, I could spend somewhat less on groceries.

I never buy organic unless it happens to be cheaper (it's a scam in most ways). I don't buy from farmer's markets anymore, although that's a splurge I've done in the past.

I cook from scratch and try to eat a lot of dried legumes (plus some canned ones for convenience), and eat tofu/vegetarian meals regularly. I buy meat only on sale and freeze it, and only buy the cheaper cuts like chicken quarters, whole chickens or ground beef. I buy the 10 pound bags of potatoes/carrots/beets/onions when they go on sale for a few dollars and plan meals to use them up.

I use a lot of frozen vegetables/fruit and also cut/freeze fresh ones that I buy on sale. This helps avoid food spoiling and lets me buy more things on sale instead of full price.

I buy generic brands when there isn't a large difference from the name brand, which is true for most things.

Most of the grocery stores near me are fairly expensive. I occasionally visit a discount store further away and try to get the shelf-stable things that are meaningfully better prices (again this is mostly just possible because of my weird memory for these things, but for stores with online ordering you can look up prices online while at the other store or at home to compare).

I splurge a bit on stocking a very large variety of cooking sauces/spices/pantry items, which helps make cooking from scratch more interesting and the food much less boring. It's expensive to stock up but each item will usually last for many meals.
posted by randomnity at 6:52 AM on November 16, 2023


Also, I have a chest freezer, which is essential for stocking up on sale items and keeping a "pantry" of frozen veggies/meat that can be used for meals when there are no good prices on fresh foods. It's possible to do that a little with a regular fridge-freezer, but it's really limiting.
posted by randomnity at 7:01 AM on November 16, 2023


I live in a high COL area, but no kid, just two middle aged adults. I don't think your spending seems excessive at all. We spend over $125/week on grocery stores and farmer's market purchases, plus one or two small costco runs/month. I also buy a large quantity of meat once a year that stays in the chest freezer (pro rate out to $75/month). Having been lightly employed this past year, I was able to cook dinner 4 times a week. We'd eat leftovers 1-2 times a week and eat out 1-2 times a week. Leftovers for lunch is pretty standard. Food waste is pretty limited (i save veggie scraps for chicken stock, which helps) and definitely will eat leftovers that have been in the fridge for 4-5 days. I also do many, many small grocery shops and will do some bargain hunting (another bonus of less work this year).

Including household non-food purchases, I'd say we spend $1250/month total on eating out and grocery shopping.
posted by jindc at 7:44 AM on November 16, 2023


I'm in my 60s. I do the geezer thing of being appalled at what things cost. Post-Covid, prices have risen quite a bit. There are lots of ways to decrease food costs while maintaining nutrition and taste, and reducing food waste, that's a different post.
posted by theora55 at 8:22 AM on November 16, 2023


I don't think anyone could answer this without knowing what your biggest outlays are.

My wife always complains our grocery bill is high, but she buys like 65% sweets. The actual food we eat doesn't cost that much. Of course our schedule requires us to eat around 50% of meals away from home, and that's gotten about 30% more expensive in the past few years.

Just wait until your kids are bigger. My youngest ate a pound of leftover meatloaf before eating dinner.
posted by The_Vegetables at 8:28 AM on November 16, 2023


I would be really curious what your grocery cart looks like right before you go to the checkout counter, and what percentage of your shopping is at the grocery store as opposed to quick purchases, convenience purchases, etc. We try to buy a lot of organic, we eat meat 2 or 3x a week but supplement with a lot of beans, pasta, etc. Our family of 9 eats for about $1,400 a month in groceries (about $150 a month dining out in addition). I am shocked we spend as much as we do - in 2019, we were still able to get by with about $800 a month with two fewer kids. I understand why milk costs a bit more; bread prices are crazy, but I have no concept on how Triscuits are now $6 a box or sometimes $2 on sale. The level of price gouging that they label "inflation" at our local Kroger is almost criminal.
posted by Happydaz at 2:45 PM on November 16, 2023


$900 doesn't seem high to me. I have data going back to 2016 (thanks YNAB). We lived in extremely high cost of living coastal US cities during all this time. Here's what we spent:

Just a couple in NYC: $300 month on groceries + $400 eating out/delivery
Couple + baby: $800 on groceries + $400 eating out/delivery rising to $600 as baby became toddler
Couple + toddler + newborn during early covid (2020-2021): $1600 on groceries + $0 on eating out and delivery
Couple + two kids: $1600 on groceries + $600 eating out/delivery

These numbers include alcohol (tiny expense when the kids were young, but probably $100-200 now). The kids eat frozen chicken nuggets, hot dogs, etc. but otherwise we eat no meat, so we spend a tiny amount on meat. We spend about $100-200 on fancy fruit and veggies at the farmer's market. Otherwise we mostly shop at Trader Joes and Whole Foods, with about $100-200 spent picking stuff up at bodega prices.
posted by caek at 6:52 PM on November 16, 2023


Oh, poor OP, I'm sure your head is swimming right now!

So I'm going to suggest a somewhat amended version of something I've done in the past when I've got similar questions like this. I've found a spending diary can be incredibly helpful - for a month, you write down EACH AND EVERY TIME you spend money on ANYTHING, and then at the end of the month you total everything up and have a look at what happened. In your case, since you're specifically looking at groceries, I would keep a more specific journal of EACH AND EVERY TIME you buy groceries, you write down exactly what each item was and what the cost was, and then total things up at the end of the month.

The reason I've found this helpful is that usually, something sticks out like a sore thumb - like, the first time I tried this, I noticed that I was spending about $200 a month on books alone. I had simply not noticed that because it was something I was doing piecemeal - I lived next to a bookshop and I would get into the habit of popping in once or twice a week to "treat myself to a little something". And this usually was about $10-15 at a pop so I didn't think it felt like a lot. It took that adding of everything up at the end of a month for it to sink in that "$10-$15 at a time twice a week adds up". So when I saw that, it was an obvious and easy change for me to make - I started hitting up the library instead.

I suspect something similar might happen if you start keeping records of your specific grocery spending for a month - something obvious may jump out at you ("holy crap, we spent $87 just on OREOS last month?"), and that might suggest a good place to start trimming back a bit. And even if it doesn't - well, now you have armed yourself with a general "here's how much we spend on meat each month, here's how much on pasta, here's how much on milk...." and that can help you figure out that hey, maybe if you drove an extra block to a different grocery store, where the milk is cheaper, you'd be able to save on milk overall. Or you could also decide that the savings would be just too small to be worth it.

But what this research would do is that it would let you get detailed information about what you are PERSONALLY doing right now, and that can be invaluable for you to figure out what YOU need to do.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:37 AM on November 17, 2023 [1 favorite]


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