Would it be hard to make friends and date in Montreal with only English?

October 27, 2023 10:05 AM

Hi all, I would love to move to Montreal in a few years (well, if I get into McGill for graduate school PhD or Concordia as both are English-speaking universities). I have hearing loss issues and speech issues and I think speaking French and hearing French would be hard. But I could read and write it I think.

Would it be hard to make friends and date people if I only speak English? A family friend speaks French very well and lived in Montreal. and said if you do not know French, many will look down on you, and you will feel isolated and excluded in many ways because of this I deem. Also, I have been told many of the night life and events would chiefly be in French, so I would be missing out? I know Montreal is bilingual, but my family friend is saying do not move there hoping you will have a great circle of friends or dating prospects will be high, but she did say you would have an easier time connecting at McGill because it is English speaking overall. I don't know, I had my hopes up on Montreal for McGill, but I don't want to feel like a total outsider at times to looked down upon because I do not speak French? Will it be hard if all of the social events are mainly in French then in Montreal?

posted by RearWindow to Society & Culture (13 answers total)

Speaking as an American anglophone who lived in the Eastern Townships for half a decade and visited Montreal on the reg, you can get by in Montreal without French, but you really do miss out a lot of things that are happening in French. I was an immigrant who was able to take French classes for free, and even though I live in Ontario now, I can read and write French, but my spoken is iffy. (I can follow conversations okay.) During my many many many visits in the city, Quebec Francophones gave me more of a pass on my lack of or nervousness with French because they did not expect Americans to be bilingual at all; they did not have those same feelings for Quebec anglophones as they felt they had no excuse to not know basic French.

So yeah, you would be fine but I feel you will miss out on a lot and not have as diverse a circle.

Edited to add: my partner is from Ontario but is fully bilingual owing to his 20+ years in Sherbrooke (not the anglo enclave Lennoxville).
posted by Kitteh at 10:13 AM on October 27, 2023 [3 favorites]

I went to McGill speaking only basic French. You are definitely shut out of some things which is a bummer but at least in my experience the anglo community in the city is large enough that dating and friendship wouldn't be an issue.
posted by jeszac at 10:21 AM on October 27, 2023

I am an anglophone who moved to Montreal almost twenty years ago. I didn't speak French well at all when I arrived and though I am much improved I still struggle sometimes. You will be fine. Especially if you have a home base at McGill (or Concordia). You will miss out on some things but there is so much going on that you will be able to find enough to do. And there are enough of us anglos around, and bilingual people, that you shouldn't find it hard meeting people.
posted by spindle at 10:25 AM on October 27, 2023

I know several unilingual anglophones who moved to Montreal and live full and rich lives there without speaking French. I wouldn't necessarily advise remaining as a unilingual anglophone in the city long term but it's definitely possible to get by just fine as one.
posted by sid at 10:30 AM on October 27, 2023

I know at least two people who relocated there for post-secondary school with only grade school French and they both (a) survived and (b) improved their French through regular exposure. When I first got there, I was only vaguely bilingual and probably could have lived a totally anglo life.

My counsel: improve your French if you can, but do not sweat it.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 11:17 AM on October 27, 2023

Before you pay to move to Montreal, pay for the premium version of the dating app of your choice.

Change your location to Montreal and do some research - how many profiles are in English/French/Bilingual? Are there people you can imagine dating? You don't have to swipe right or match with anybody, but this will give you a good idea of the folks you will encounter. Bumble offers the BFF option for expanding your social circle.
posted by Juniper Toast at 12:05 PM on October 27, 2023 [3 favorites]

The Premier of Quebec has recently announced that university fees for English speakers from outside the province will be doubled.
Contact McGill and find out if this has actually been made law, as there is a lot of resistance (not surprising) and I'm not sure when it takes effect.
Good luck.
Also note, you could easily learn French while you are there, and most Quebequois speak English.
posted by Enid Lareg at 12:14 PM on October 27, 2023 [2 favorites]

Good luck trying to deter Legault and cronies. But OP will get a pass because out of province grad students are exempt, IIRC.
posted by Kitteh at 12:25 PM on October 27, 2023 [1 favorite]

on my 1st trip to Montreal (in the before times) I went to an English- speaking meetup of local mefites and found them congenial.
posted by brujita at 12:49 PM on October 27, 2023

You can definitely live a full life in Montreal without learning the local language. There’s a rich francophone culture that operates in parallel to what you’ll experience in English, and I’d encourage you to learn at least some French so you can experience it — theatre and literature in particular thrive in francophone Quebec.

If you do end up moving, it will be easier to have a diverse set of experiences if you live outside of the student areas. You’d still be fine speaking English in the Plateau and Mile-End, a bit less in Rosemont or Hochelaga or Verdun.

As a francophone Montrealer, I’d suggest you learn at least some French as a mark of respect, and default to French first for public interactions outside of Anglo student areas. It will go a long way to enriching your experience of this unique city.
posted by third word on a random page at 2:22 PM on October 27, 2023 [10 favorites]

third word on a random page, flagged as fantastic. I agree. I always try in French for as long as I can when I am in the city. My husband has Anglo relatives in NDG who have lived there their entire lives and they do speak French too. Speaking French or at least being willing to speak French in a predominantly Francophone culture is just good manners as well as respecting the history of the province.
posted by Kitteh at 4:50 AM on October 28, 2023

I dunno if it's worth a third but yeah, in Quebec if you have any French use it, and if you don't have any French make an effort to pick some up. You can get by in only English but you'll always be one step below people who have the basics and are making an effort. Stumbling your way into French is a sign of someone who cares about social interaction and getting along, stubbornly sticking with English means you're a douche. (And I say this as someone who doesn't like the French language because of its bullshit gendering.)
posted by seanmpuckett at 5:38 AM on October 28, 2023 [1 favorite]

I agree with everyone above on this point: you have a few years and this is a choice so why not start learning/improving your French right now?! Trying to speak the local language usually makes a world of difference because you’re showing respect. It’ll open more doors and generally people will be more willing to speak English if you’re trying to speak French. I have never lived in Montreal but I visited when I only spoke English. People were very nice but I also left feeling incredibly inspired to actually learn French! I can’t wait to return.
posted by smorgasbord at 10:47 AM on October 28, 2023 [1 favorite]