Why do people play video games centered on misery?
May 31, 2023 5:56 AM Subscribe
I'm mystified by the idea that people would spend a significant amount of time playing a video game, ostensibly for fun, that promises sadness and misery. I regularly see comments from users that a game "wrecked" them, made them re-experience past grief or sadness, etc., and it makes no sense to me: what is the pleasure in feeling bad in a game? I'm familiar with the idea that games can and should provide different kinds of experiences and have goals much different from AAA-fests.
I'm also familiar with the concept of "different strokes for different folks," and I am not judging players who seek these experiences. I am not saying these games are bad, people shouldn't play them, etc., etc. I read/watch plenty of difficult material. I've gone hunting for answers to this question, and I didn't find anything quite like an answer. I am curious to know what the appeal is, and if it differs in some way from watching a melodrama, reading a novel where everyone dies, etc., etc.
I'm also familiar with the concept of "different strokes for different folks," and I am not judging players who seek these experiences. I am not saying these games are bad, people shouldn't play them, etc., etc. I read/watch plenty of difficult material. I've gone hunting for answers to this question, and I didn't find anything quite like an answer. I am curious to know what the appeal is, and if it differs in some way from watching a melodrama, reading a novel where everyone dies, etc., etc.
I haven't been a game player since like the early 2000s but my kids are and I kept an eye on my older child playing Undertale, where your moral choices in the game change the ending of the game very considerably. That really opened my eyes to some of the storytelling and interactive capabilities of games (which I'm sure have only grown since.) Sadness and misery are of course only one set of emotional registers, but emotional registers are pretty human - tragedy and comedy and all that.
I think I'm actually the reverse of you -- for me, once I got where storytelling was going in some games, it started to make more sense that people would immerse in a complex world, because there are things to grapple with. It's like VR - when my son was making a pitch for getting an Oculus, one of his reasons was that people are starting to do things like tours of residential schools.
posted by warriorqueen at 6:04 AM on May 31, 2023 [2 favorites]
I think I'm actually the reverse of you -- for me, once I got where storytelling was going in some games, it started to make more sense that people would immerse in a complex world, because there are things to grapple with. It's like VR - when my son was making a pitch for getting an Oculus, one of his reasons was that people are starting to do things like tours of residential schools.
posted by warriorqueen at 6:04 AM on May 31, 2023 [2 favorites]
Yeah, what makes this easy enough to understand about why people like sad movies or books, but so difficult for video games?
Also, I'll note you don't always know what's coming. I don't usually like obviously 'downer' type media. But I picked up this game called Brothers bc it looked fun. And it was. But near the end there was some surprisingly strong emotional content, and I cried. It was especially interesting because some what made it so emotional was aspects of interaction and character control that have no analogs in film or literature.
But I figure it's the same with books and movies too: sometimes something hits heavy and you enjoy the experience as a whole, even if you didn't seek it out for that emotional impact.
posted by SaltySalticid at 6:07 AM on May 31, 2023 [3 favorites]
Also, I'll note you don't always know what's coming. I don't usually like obviously 'downer' type media. But I picked up this game called Brothers bc it looked fun. And it was. But near the end there was some surprisingly strong emotional content, and I cried. It was especially interesting because some what made it so emotional was aspects of interaction and character control that have no analogs in film or literature.
But I figure it's the same with books and movies too: sometimes something hits heavy and you enjoy the experience as a whole, even if you didn't seek it out for that emotional impact.
posted by SaltySalticid at 6:07 AM on May 31, 2023 [3 favorites]
Not a direct answer to your question, but I found that the novel Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zevin did a wonderful job of illuminating why people love games, including violent and sad ones.
posted by guessthis at 6:10 AM on May 31, 2023 [5 favorites]
posted by guessthis at 6:10 AM on May 31, 2023 [5 favorites]
Best answer: Games are just another form of art. And some art is sad. Some people don't want to watch sad movies or read sad books, some do. It can be an interesting and enjoyable experience to step into a story and 'wear' the feelings. It doesn't need to be High Art That Means Something, it can just be a story. As game technology has evolved, the capacity to create a more immersive experience has too. In my opinion and experience, a good game rivals a good novel in storytelling -- and while I don't only read sad books, or play sad games -- sometimes I do!
Another aspect of games is that there's almost some aspect of overcoming or succeeding in the face of a sad story. Sure some sad stuff happened, but dangit, you survived all the sad stuff!
posted by so fucking future at 6:20 AM on May 31, 2023 [3 favorites]
Another aspect of games is that there's almost some aspect of overcoming or succeeding in the face of a sad story. Sure some sad stuff happened, but dangit, you survived all the sad stuff!
posted by so fucking future at 6:20 AM on May 31, 2023 [3 favorites]
Best answer: One possibility: if your life is quite emotionally stable, you can use games (or other media) to offer a vicarious experience of the kinds of highs & lows that you know are available within the human experience, but that you’re not experiencing in reality.
On this theory, people with direct or recent experience of trauma might be less likely to seek it out in gaming form. Not sure whether there’s any research or anecdata that might bear that out.
posted by Puppy McSock at 6:32 AM on May 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
On this theory, people with direct or recent experience of trauma might be less likely to seek it out in gaming form. Not sure whether there’s any research or anecdata that might bear that out.
posted by Puppy McSock at 6:32 AM on May 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
Best answer: You may want to read up on the term "catharsis", specifically the way it was used in ancient Greece.
The reason that so many ancient Greek playwrights wrote tragedies is that the Greeks came to feel that this kind of emotional "flushing" of negative emotions was healthy. They already believed in a form of physical catharsis - kind of how some people even today drink all kinds of weird teas to "flush toxins" from their bodies - and some Greek philosophers noticed that watching tragedies had a similar effect on their mental health as well.
And if you think about it, there's kinda something to that. A lot of us have all kinds of random low-level crap that we're just always kinda dealing with, but we're all in the habit of trying to "tough it out" and stiff-upper-lip our way through it, even though having a good cry about it would make us feel better. But if we go see a sad movie or play a sad video game or read a sad book or whatever, it's kind of an excuse to cry - and our bodies don't really care what's triggered that crying jag, our bodies are just all "oh thank God we're finally crying whew".
Sad movies can be cathartic in the ancient Greek sense. So can sad video games. Or sad books. Hell, sometimes I even tear up at commercials.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 6:39 AM on May 31, 2023 [13 favorites]
The reason that so many ancient Greek playwrights wrote tragedies is that the Greeks came to feel that this kind of emotional "flushing" of negative emotions was healthy. They already believed in a form of physical catharsis - kind of how some people even today drink all kinds of weird teas to "flush toxins" from their bodies - and some Greek philosophers noticed that watching tragedies had a similar effect on their mental health as well.
And if you think about it, there's kinda something to that. A lot of us have all kinds of random low-level crap that we're just always kinda dealing with, but we're all in the habit of trying to "tough it out" and stiff-upper-lip our way through it, even though having a good cry about it would make us feel better. But if we go see a sad movie or play a sad video game or read a sad book or whatever, it's kind of an excuse to cry - and our bodies don't really care what's triggered that crying jag, our bodies are just all "oh thank God we're finally crying whew".
Sad movies can be cathartic in the ancient Greek sense. So can sad video games. Or sad books. Hell, sometimes I even tear up at commercials.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 6:39 AM on May 31, 2023 [13 favorites]
Catharsis
posted by bearette at 6:39 AM on May 31, 2023 [4 favorites]
posted by bearette at 6:39 AM on May 31, 2023 [4 favorites]
Sadness and tragedy have been part of our stories since the dawn of time. You could say that it offers a "safe" way of dealing with difficult themes, experiencing vicariously things that you wouldn't want to experience directly. Experiencing sadness is also cathartic, and you can feel uplifted afterwards.
Different people also get different things out of stories, depending on their age, their life experiences, and so on. I remember when I was younger I enjoyed watching very depressing or bleak movies, which I don't anymore. When I was young these things felt more unreal, and I was more self-centered, not having any dependents on whose wellfare my happiness depends.
Currently my 13 year old daughter is enjoying the videogame Spiritfarer, which is basically a game about dying. While it uses the mechanics of a farming / building / management game, you are taking the role of Charon, the ferryman who takes people across the River Styx, and all your interactions with the NPCs in the game is about them gradually coming to terms with their impending death. My daughter knows very well what it's about, and finds it very moving, but that lasts for a moment before she's engrossed in the next task in the game. I've watched part of it with her and it makes me tear up, but I find it beautiful rather than morbid.
I also recently enjoyed a game called Carrion, in which you play the monster in an Alien-type scenario. Living out a gruesome fantasy is enormous fun, especially since it's obviously just a game and you wouldn't play it if the gameplay wasn't also challenging and engrossing.
posted by snarfois at 6:41 AM on May 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
Different people also get different things out of stories, depending on their age, their life experiences, and so on. I remember when I was younger I enjoyed watching very depressing or bleak movies, which I don't anymore. When I was young these things felt more unreal, and I was more self-centered, not having any dependents on whose wellfare my happiness depends.
Currently my 13 year old daughter is enjoying the videogame Spiritfarer, which is basically a game about dying. While it uses the mechanics of a farming / building / management game, you are taking the role of Charon, the ferryman who takes people across the River Styx, and all your interactions with the NPCs in the game is about them gradually coming to terms with their impending death. My daughter knows very well what it's about, and finds it very moving, but that lasts for a moment before she's engrossed in the next task in the game. I've watched part of it with her and it makes me tear up, but I find it beautiful rather than morbid.
I also recently enjoyed a game called Carrion, in which you play the monster in an Alien-type scenario. Living out a gruesome fantasy is enormous fun, especially since it's obviously just a game and you wouldn't play it if the gameplay wasn't also challenging and engrossing.
posted by snarfois at 6:41 AM on May 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
That's not really what I'm looking for in a game, but when I do run across it, I wouldn't say it strikes me as meaningfully different from experiencing other forms of media that stir up sad or difficult emotions. Maybe in the amount of time spent, a couple of hours on a sad movie versus however many on a video game - but I imagine most of these games we're talking about aren't like relentless misery but rather a few big emotional climaxes during overall gameplay that isn't like that all the time, so maybe even that isn't so different.
I can certainly understand why someone wouldn't be into those sorts of experiences in their media at all, but if you're up for a sad book or movie, and you like games, I don't know why you wouldn't be up for a sad game.
posted by Stacey at 6:48 AM on May 31, 2023
I can certainly understand why someone wouldn't be into those sorts of experiences in their media at all, but if you're up for a sad book or movie, and you like games, I don't know why you wouldn't be up for a sad game.
posted by Stacey at 6:48 AM on May 31, 2023
Best answer: Game misery is fundamentally "safe" in a way that real-life misery isn't. It's controlled, low-stakes, voluntarily chosen. I think that distinction makes the experience qualitatively different, even if the language we use is the same.
In fact, in a weird way, I suspect that the feeling of power when we choose a miserable experience in a fully safe and controlled context is the source of much of the pleasure. Humans seem to have a drive to voluntarily replay scary experiences as a kind of learning tool: I read somewhere that children in concentration camps didn't play comfy escapist games, they played Prison Guard and Prisoner. So the experience of going through something unpleasant and dangerous while knowing it's in your control and can't really hurt you - like weeping sentimentally over a sad game -scratches some kind of deep psychic itch.
posted by Bardolph at 6:54 AM on May 31, 2023 [12 favorites]
In fact, in a weird way, I suspect that the feeling of power when we choose a miserable experience in a fully safe and controlled context is the source of much of the pleasure. Humans seem to have a drive to voluntarily replay scary experiences as a kind of learning tool: I read somewhere that children in concentration camps didn't play comfy escapist games, they played Prison Guard and Prisoner. So the experience of going through something unpleasant and dangerous while knowing it's in your control and can't really hurt you - like weeping sentimentally over a sad game -scratches some kind of deep psychic itch.
posted by Bardolph at 6:54 AM on May 31, 2023 [12 favorites]
Mod note: A couple deleted. Hi, OP, please keep in mind that Ask Metafilter isn't for back and forth discussion on a topic, but to get answers to a specific question. It's fine to pop in to clarify if people want or need more info, but otherwise best to just relax, take in the answers, and determine for yourself what is useful for your purposes.
posted by Brandon Blatcher (staff) at 7:16 AM on May 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by Brandon Blatcher (staff) at 7:16 AM on May 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
On this theory, people with direct or recent experience of trauma might be less likely to seek it out in gaming form.
Or, as Bardolph says, they may want to experience trauma in a way that they control. With a game, you control both the terms of your engagement with the actual media and, sometimes, the outcome itself. With a movie in a theater, for example, all you can do is walk out, and then the sad or frightening thing is "still happening" in some sense.
posted by praemunire at 7:17 AM on May 31, 2023 [2 favorites]
Or, as Bardolph says, they may want to experience trauma in a way that they control. With a game, you control both the terms of your engagement with the actual media and, sometimes, the outcome itself. With a movie in a theater, for example, all you can do is walk out, and then the sad or frightening thing is "still happening" in some sense.
posted by praemunire at 7:17 AM on May 31, 2023 [2 favorites]
"A tragedy, then, is the imitation of an action that is serious and also, as having magnitude, complete in itself...with incidents arousing pity and fear, wherewith to accomplish its catharsis of such emotions."
- Aristotle, The Poetics
posted by brookeb at 7:22 AM on May 31, 2023
- Aristotle, The Poetics
posted by brookeb at 7:22 AM on May 31, 2023
Catharsis
This. The other thing that comes to mind is that video games are safer spaces to engage with certain ideas and certain forms of play. It allows you a way to explore these spaces without the worry of the real world intruding and that can be quite a liberating and freeing experience.
posted by Fizz at 7:37 AM on May 31, 2023
This. The other thing that comes to mind is that video games are safer spaces to engage with certain ideas and certain forms of play. It allows you a way to explore these spaces without the worry of the real world intruding and that can be quite a liberating and freeing experience.
posted by Fizz at 7:37 AM on May 31, 2023
Here’s a little something about me:
When I was a child my parents would hit me when I did things they didn’t think I should (and it turns out that I did things they didn’t think I should several times a week). When I was getting hit it was important that I express my remorse via bawling terror or I would likely get hit again until my response was more in line with what they thought it should be (the most I ever got hit was the time I took a hit and laughed). This ultimately resulted in my laundering all of my actual emotional responses into the emotional responses that my parents wanted until it eventually got to the point where it is kind of impossible for me to disentangle what I’m really feeling from what I think is the least likely feeling to draw further punishment.
Yes, this is one of the things I discuss regularly with a professional who has training in talking to people in situations like mine.
One of the nice things about media is that it shortcuts me past a lot of the internal confusion about what I feel. I watch a happy movie to feel happy and then I feel happy. Success! I play a scary video game to feel scared and then I feel scared. Success! I listen to a sad song to feel sad and then I feel sad. Success!
Any media that telegraphs how it’s trying to make me feel lets me take my focus off of “how am I supposed to feel about this” and allows me to instead focus on whether or not it succeeds or fails at making me feel that feeling.
Feeling sad sometimes is good for me. Feeling scared sometimes is good for me. Feeling angry sometimes is good for me. It took me a lot of talking (and a lot of time and money) to get to the point where I could accept that.
posted by Parasite Unseen at 12:09 PM on May 31, 2023 [4 favorites]
When I was a child my parents would hit me when I did things they didn’t think I should (and it turns out that I did things they didn’t think I should several times a week). When I was getting hit it was important that I express my remorse via bawling terror or I would likely get hit again until my response was more in line with what they thought it should be (the most I ever got hit was the time I took a hit and laughed). This ultimately resulted in my laundering all of my actual emotional responses into the emotional responses that my parents wanted until it eventually got to the point where it is kind of impossible for me to disentangle what I’m really feeling from what I think is the least likely feeling to draw further punishment.
Yes, this is one of the things I discuss regularly with a professional who has training in talking to people in situations like mine.
One of the nice things about media is that it shortcuts me past a lot of the internal confusion about what I feel. I watch a happy movie to feel happy and then I feel happy. Success! I play a scary video game to feel scared and then I feel scared. Success! I listen to a sad song to feel sad and then I feel sad. Success!
Any media that telegraphs how it’s trying to make me feel lets me take my focus off of “how am I supposed to feel about this” and allows me to instead focus on whether or not it succeeds or fails at making me feel that feeling.
Feeling sad sometimes is good for me. Feeling scared sometimes is good for me. Feeling angry sometimes is good for me. It took me a lot of talking (and a lot of time and money) to get to the point where I could accept that.
posted by Parasite Unseen at 12:09 PM on May 31, 2023 [4 favorites]
My partner and I had this discussion about fiction in general and determined that we consume fiction for escapism, while some other people consume fiction for catharsis. Research also suggests people empathize more with characters in sad or tragic situations. I struggle with hyperempathy so do not need help in that regard! But other people may find they connect more with characters when fiction is sad, and they are seeking that out.
posted by brook horse at 3:16 PM on May 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by brook horse at 3:16 PM on May 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
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