You took a "career break". It worked out OK. Tell me how.
March 29, 2023 2:10 AM Subscribe
I'm on the verge of quitting my job without another one lined up. I'm in about as good as a place I could be to do this, though there's always risk, and I'm very risk averse, so please let me know various ways this could work out mostly alright. Or if not - scare the hell out of me.
I haven't fit in my new role, it's been a year and I'm stretched in so many directions I'm fraying. There's been health (physical and mental) consequences for this. I'm seeing a career coach, who is helping me sort out my options, but what I really want to do is take a few months (3-5) to upskill myself.
- I'm in a decent enough place with savings to keep myself afloat for 6 months, or longer (but I'd hate for it to be longer!)
- My current skillset is in fairly decent demand (SEO), although I'm not as good at the technical side, which I'd like to improve on
- My training goals are to improve my analytical/stats skills, notably SQL
- I also do Pilates teaching and freelance writing on the side, but that's not likely to make anything more than a little supplementary income
- I don't have any significant gaps in my career history, although my career path is all over the place I've worked consistently
- I have left jobs before with nothing lined up - and it's always worked out fine (once was to travel to the UK, where I got a job within 2 months)
- My current role has a huge notice period - 3 months - and the idea of grinding through 3 months then doing another job makes my anxiety tick up
What I'm really after is a crystal ball promising it'll be all OK, but of course that's not readily available in 2023. I'm based in London so my cost of living includes an insane amount of rent, but as I mentioned I do have savings, and feel like if I don't leave.... ugh I can't even stand it. Like, I fantasize about getting COVID to get time off work. I took a long holiday (3 weeks) earlier this year and was anxious about work the entire time.
So, dearest MeFi, when did you take a leap like this and was it alright, what should I keep in mind, how do I set myself up to succeed?
I haven't fit in my new role, it's been a year and I'm stretched in so many directions I'm fraying. There's been health (physical and mental) consequences for this. I'm seeing a career coach, who is helping me sort out my options, but what I really want to do is take a few months (3-5) to upskill myself.
- I'm in a decent enough place with savings to keep myself afloat for 6 months, or longer (but I'd hate for it to be longer!)
- My current skillset is in fairly decent demand (SEO), although I'm not as good at the technical side, which I'd like to improve on
- My training goals are to improve my analytical/stats skills, notably SQL
- I also do Pilates teaching and freelance writing on the side, but that's not likely to make anything more than a little supplementary income
- I don't have any significant gaps in my career history, although my career path is all over the place I've worked consistently
- I have left jobs before with nothing lined up - and it's always worked out fine (once was to travel to the UK, where I got a job within 2 months)
- My current role has a huge notice period - 3 months - and the idea of grinding through 3 months then doing another job makes my anxiety tick up
What I'm really after is a crystal ball promising it'll be all OK, but of course that's not readily available in 2023. I'm based in London so my cost of living includes an insane amount of rent, but as I mentioned I do have savings, and feel like if I don't leave.... ugh I can't even stand it. Like, I fantasize about getting COVID to get time off work. I took a long holiday (3 weeks) earlier this year and was anxious about work the entire time.
So, dearest MeFi, when did you take a leap like this and was it alright, what should I keep in mind, how do I set myself up to succeed?
The crystal ball you're looking for gets more reliable as your willingness to take a longer view increases. Will everything be OK in 6 months? That's hard to say. Will everything be OK looking back 5, 10 years from now? Probably!
[I] was anxious about work the entire time.
I want to say, at the outset, that I'm not sure I'm a kind of person for whom this ever fades away. I think it's a commentary on the state of the world, since the safety nets that exist (if you have access to them) are so meager.
I took a career break in 2008. This was, inconveniently, just before the economy went ass up. I planned for a ~4 month break, but it ended up taking me 9 months to get a job. That job was an enormous pay cut, but I was hopping from academic research to literally anything else so I had to acknowledge that I should be prepared for that (and, again, the economy was in freefall so I was happy to take anything). Funny thing is, that job was in a nascent department in a nonprofit org that had values I supported wholeheartedly. That meant a lot to me at the time, because I had lost all faith in the ethics of my academic career path and had no faith in the private business side of my field from the beginning. I wanted out, out, and I did not know what would come next. This non-profit gig seemed like a really interesting niche.
That was 14 years ago, almost to the day. I'm still at the same nonprofit. I've helped grow my department to almost five times the number of staff that were here when I joined. The work I've been able to champion and lead and be a part of in those 14 years? It has been (and is) amazing, fulfilling, engaging.
Are there downsides? Yes. I only started making what I would consider a "decent salary" in the last ~4 years. I have more work than I can handle and I still have frustrations that make me fantasize about what could come next. But am I in a moral panic like I was in 2007? Absolutely not.
Part of your challenge is recognizing what your tolerance level might be for ambiguity. If you're comfotable with an ambiguous approach to future opportunities, the crystal ball can be an optimistic window into a future that represents some degree of change in your life. If that ambiguity is undesirable, and you have a really clear idea of what you'll want to do with those training goals once you're started accomplishing them, then I think it's up to you to put your clear expectations on the board. You're the one who'll need to identify where the opportunities can be in the field you're looking to grab. And if you have this line of thinking, it helps to know what the brass rings are? What are the roles or companies that will really make yu feel better about taking this break? Can you enumerate them? If you can, then you have something to work with (alone and with your career coach) that can help you be a bit more quantitative with your risk/reward assessment.
Good luck!
posted by late afternoon dreaming hotel at 4:16 AM on March 29, 2023 [11 favorites]
[I] was anxious about work the entire time.
I want to say, at the outset, that I'm not sure I'm a kind of person for whom this ever fades away. I think it's a commentary on the state of the world, since the safety nets that exist (if you have access to them) are so meager.
I took a career break in 2008. This was, inconveniently, just before the economy went ass up. I planned for a ~4 month break, but it ended up taking me 9 months to get a job. That job was an enormous pay cut, but I was hopping from academic research to literally anything else so I had to acknowledge that I should be prepared for that (and, again, the economy was in freefall so I was happy to take anything). Funny thing is, that job was in a nascent department in a nonprofit org that had values I supported wholeheartedly. That meant a lot to me at the time, because I had lost all faith in the ethics of my academic career path and had no faith in the private business side of my field from the beginning. I wanted out, out, and I did not know what would come next. This non-profit gig seemed like a really interesting niche.
That was 14 years ago, almost to the day. I'm still at the same nonprofit. I've helped grow my department to almost five times the number of staff that were here when I joined. The work I've been able to champion and lead and be a part of in those 14 years? It has been (and is) amazing, fulfilling, engaging.
Are there downsides? Yes. I only started making what I would consider a "decent salary" in the last ~4 years. I have more work than I can handle and I still have frustrations that make me fantasize about what could come next. But am I in a moral panic like I was in 2007? Absolutely not.
Part of your challenge is recognizing what your tolerance level might be for ambiguity. If you're comfotable with an ambiguous approach to future opportunities, the crystal ball can be an optimistic window into a future that represents some degree of change in your life. If that ambiguity is undesirable, and you have a really clear idea of what you'll want to do with those training goals once you're started accomplishing them, then I think it's up to you to put your clear expectations on the board. You're the one who'll need to identify where the opportunities can be in the field you're looking to grab. And if you have this line of thinking, it helps to know what the brass rings are? What are the roles or companies that will really make yu feel better about taking this break? Can you enumerate them? If you can, then you have something to work with (alone and with your career coach) that can help you be a bit more quantitative with your risk/reward assessment.
Good luck!
posted by late afternoon dreaming hotel at 4:16 AM on March 29, 2023 [11 favorites]
I left a Fortune 500 company back in the day. They gave me outplacement services. I didn't find a job in a year of looking. Finally one of my in-house customers at the old job gave me a programming task and that kicked off a fairly long period of self-employment.
Somewhere along the line, I decided that learning SAS would be a good idea for me. They had a new tutorial product that gave me enough of a start to get a certificate, and I got a couple contacts via an internet group. In the end, something different came along, but I got close enough to the SAS world to be pretty confident it would have worked.
So, the morals of the stories are 1) keep in touch with your old friends and 2) have some kind of plan and keep working at it.
posted by SemiSalt at 5:25 AM on March 29, 2023
Somewhere along the line, I decided that learning SAS would be a good idea for me. They had a new tutorial product that gave me enough of a start to get a certificate, and I got a couple contacts via an internet group. In the end, something different came along, but I got close enough to the SAS world to be pretty confident it would have worked.
So, the morals of the stories are 1) keep in touch with your old friends and 2) have some kind of plan and keep working at it.
posted by SemiSalt at 5:25 AM on March 29, 2023
I've done it twice for about 7 months each time. The benefit to my mental health was great, i got a little distance to my professional self and could take the chance to be applying ×for× jobs, not escaping my last one.
posted by Iteki at 7:05 AM on March 29, 2023
posted by Iteki at 7:05 AM on March 29, 2023
I've done this twice, but both times with a very clear sense of purpose and a list of things to achieve in the break (oriented entirely around reskilling for a new target career). Both times it took about a year+ to achieve the various knowledge/certifications I was after and then line up a new lower-level job.
...the first time I left a highly-technical profession to move to an adjacent but less technical position for slightly lower pay, but more freedom. Study was required, but it was mainly self-driven and easily provable in an interview. When I exited this career (it had become boring) I was making about twice what I had in the first career (NOT adjusting for inflation, please note).
The second time I left that less-technical position to enter a wholly different field that likes to think it approves of self-driven learning, but which is in fact highly susceptible to valuing formal education first, so I did the latter, found an entry'ish level job despite my age, and then rapidly climbed the ladder (due in no small part to my extended "hard science" technical experience in my first career and ability to "read" people from my second career).
While I still value that first career jump, it was the second one that really set me up for a nice life in this third career.
So, obviously IME, this can all work but also IME it works best if you have a really specific set of things you want to achieve in the break. A friend of mine took a "brief" break that ended up with five years of unemployment before she could break back into a real career. I assign that outcome to the fact that she more or less just threw her hands up and left with no specific goal or plan in mind and refused to go back into her old field. She burned through all of her (substantial) savings. She's doing OK now, but her life goals took a real hit.
posted by aramaic at 7:35 AM on March 29, 2023
...the first time I left a highly-technical profession to move to an adjacent but less technical position for slightly lower pay, but more freedom. Study was required, but it was mainly self-driven and easily provable in an interview. When I exited this career (it had become boring) I was making about twice what I had in the first career (NOT adjusting for inflation, please note).
The second time I left that less-technical position to enter a wholly different field that likes to think it approves of self-driven learning, but which is in fact highly susceptible to valuing formal education first, so I did the latter, found an entry'ish level job despite my age, and then rapidly climbed the ladder (due in no small part to my extended "hard science" technical experience in my first career and ability to "read" people from my second career).
While I still value that first career jump, it was the second one that really set me up for a nice life in this third career.
So, obviously IME, this can all work but also IME it works best if you have a really specific set of things you want to achieve in the break. A friend of mine took a "brief" break that ended up with five years of unemployment before she could break back into a real career. I assign that outcome to the fact that she more or less just threw her hands up and left with no specific goal or plan in mind and refused to go back into her old field. She burned through all of her (substantial) savings. She's doing OK now, but her life goals took a real hit.
posted by aramaic at 7:35 AM on March 29, 2023
I am also thinking of doing a similar break. One thing I have been thinking about is taking on a “bridge gig” - either something very chill (but likely low pay) or volunteering in a field I’m interested in to get a little more experience.
I’d also put in a plug for potentially signing up for some temp agencies if you feel like you are ready to dip a toe back into the workplace. I’ve done so many random things from proofreading industry directories to basic data entry. Getting a chance to scope out some other work environments, networking (even if the people you are working with aren’t in your field their spouses/colleagues/friends might be), trying out some totally random things you’ve never done before helped me get a better sense of what I actually like doing all day at work.
posted by forkisbetter at 8:08 AM on March 29, 2023 [3 favorites]
I’d also put in a plug for potentially signing up for some temp agencies if you feel like you are ready to dip a toe back into the workplace. I’ve done so many random things from proofreading industry directories to basic data entry. Getting a chance to scope out some other work environments, networking (even if the people you are working with aren’t in your field their spouses/colleagues/friends might be), trying out some totally random things you’ve never done before helped me get a better sense of what I actually like doing all day at work.
posted by forkisbetter at 8:08 AM on March 29, 2023 [3 favorites]
I did something like this, although my period of unemployment was somewhere between voluntary and involuntary. I had a year & change off, and I took that time to take lessons and learn more programming skills. During interviews, I had to talk about what I was doing during the gap. I said that I wanted to change career tracks (from web design to web development) and called the time off a "self guided bootcamp".
In general, I think as long as you can make it sound like a positive thing, that's all they want to hear.
posted by kpmcguire at 8:10 AM on March 29, 2023 [1 favorite]
In general, I think as long as you can make it sound like a positive thing, that's all they want to hear.
posted by kpmcguire at 8:10 AM on March 29, 2023 [1 favorite]
FWIW I'm a data scientist and it took me 4 months to find a job after getting laid off this summer, and I applied vigorously and widely. So 4 months was the best case scenario for me. So, are you ready to apply for jobs within a couple months after quitting?
posted by MisantropicPainforest at 9:12 AM on March 29, 2023 [3 favorites]
posted by MisantropicPainforest at 9:12 AM on March 29, 2023 [3 favorites]
I was a "trailing spouse" for my academic husband for awhile, so twice I have quit a job to move with him, followed by a few months of enjoying being jobless, then by increasing concerns about money, then by getting a new job. I've heard it's easier to get a new job when you have one, and that may be true, but I didn't find my job search in either situation to be particularly difficult (that may just be the field I'm in). But they want to hear a story that makes sense. Maybe joblessness keeps me from top paying positions at big tech companies but I'm not really interested in those anyway. I think my periods of joblessness signal that work-life balance is important to me (which it is). I'm not going to pretend that I will give my company 110% of my life. I will work hard for what they pay me for, go home and enjoy my life.
posted by muddgirl at 9:36 AM on March 29, 2023
posted by muddgirl at 9:36 AM on March 29, 2023
I took a career break in 2018; I am in the technology industry but not a software developer/engineer.
I gave notice to my previous company end of Q1, did some "consulting" for them as a slow taper off, maybe 40 hrs total over six weeks. I did not work from April to January the following year, and started my new job in Feb.
The good:
- My partner continued working during that time, so we had income coming in.
- We had a decent amount of savings
- I really enjoyed the break. I did some gardening, lots of knitting, binged on Grey's Anatomy and romance novels. It was very restorative for my brain and my soul.
- I worked with a career counselor, but they're not really an expert in the tech industry, so it was a so-so experience.
- I was also able to regularly see a counselor for brain and life stuff. This felt like a frivolous expense since I wasn't working, but mental health is important! And I felt I finally had the bandwidth to think about the stuff we talked about in our sessions.
The bad:
- Since I quit, and I wasn't let go, I was not entitled to unemployment insurance payments.
- I am a naturally anxious person. Did my anxiety about work go away? No, it just changed. I became anxious about never finding any work again. Yes, I am great at catastrophizing, too! I thought I could tell myself to enjoy the downtime for X months, and then start applying for jobs on month Y, but I felt the (self-imposed) pressure from Day 1. So it wasn't a totally relaxing time.
- Despite knowing that my partner and I both contributed to our savings pool, and we both agreed to my career break plan, it really bothered me that I "wasn't contributing" to the relationship. I would agonize about whether I "deserved" $7 bubble tea for like a week. (My partner was not resentful at all, this was all in my head.)
The outcome
- I job searched for 4-6 months, but I'm not a very well-networked person so this was all through cold-applying.
- For my current job, a recruiter reached out to me via LinkedIn! Interviewed for a job in November, got a verbal offer in December (over holiday break!), formal offer in Jan, and started work in Feb.
- I now work for a big, international tech company. I have more than doubled my salary. Still stressful but a different kind of stress, and I feel like for the pay it's kinda worth it?
Keep in mind that the job market of 2018/2019 is waaaaaaay different form the job market of 2023. Especially in the tech world (the FAANGs, anyway), there are layoffs left and right. I think the outcome could have been very different based on timing. So consider your industry, and your local job market where you intend to apply.
posted by tinydancer at 9:46 AM on March 29, 2023 [1 favorite]
I gave notice to my previous company end of Q1, did some "consulting" for them as a slow taper off, maybe 40 hrs total over six weeks. I did not work from April to January the following year, and started my new job in Feb.
The good:
- My partner continued working during that time, so we had income coming in.
- We had a decent amount of savings
- I really enjoyed the break. I did some gardening, lots of knitting, binged on Grey's Anatomy and romance novels. It was very restorative for my brain and my soul.
- I worked with a career counselor, but they're not really an expert in the tech industry, so it was a so-so experience.
- I was also able to regularly see a counselor for brain and life stuff. This felt like a frivolous expense since I wasn't working, but mental health is important! And I felt I finally had the bandwidth to think about the stuff we talked about in our sessions.
The bad:
- Since I quit, and I wasn't let go, I was not entitled to unemployment insurance payments.
- I am a naturally anxious person. Did my anxiety about work go away? No, it just changed. I became anxious about never finding any work again. Yes, I am great at catastrophizing, too! I thought I could tell myself to enjoy the downtime for X months, and then start applying for jobs on month Y, but I felt the (self-imposed) pressure from Day 1. So it wasn't a totally relaxing time.
- Despite knowing that my partner and I both contributed to our savings pool, and we both agreed to my career break plan, it really bothered me that I "wasn't contributing" to the relationship. I would agonize about whether I "deserved" $7 bubble tea for like a week. (My partner was not resentful at all, this was all in my head.)
The outcome
- I job searched for 4-6 months, but I'm not a very well-networked person so this was all through cold-applying.
- For my current job, a recruiter reached out to me via LinkedIn! Interviewed for a job in November, got a verbal offer in December (over holiday break!), formal offer in Jan, and started work in Feb.
- I now work for a big, international tech company. I have more than doubled my salary. Still stressful but a different kind of stress, and I feel like for the pay it's kinda worth it?
Keep in mind that the job market of 2018/2019 is waaaaaaay different form the job market of 2023. Especially in the tech world (the FAANGs, anyway), there are layoffs left and right. I think the outcome could have been very different based on timing. So consider your industry, and your local job market where you intend to apply.
posted by tinydancer at 9:46 AM on March 29, 2023 [1 favorite]
- You'll feel far less anxious if you're running towards something you love (as opposed to running away from something you hate)
- If you're too burnt out to think about what you can run towards, take some short term disability leave rather than quitting. IDK where you are and what your circumstances are but in the US it should not be difficult to tell your primary care physician or your therapist (if you have one) that you're feeling overwhelmed with anxiety and you need, say, a 6 week break from work. Make space for yourself to rest and recover and wonder what it is you DO want.
- If you're burnt out, I would suggest postponing your career coaching as well. Wait until you have a healthy baseline to stay building your future from.
posted by MiraK at 10:07 AM on March 29, 2023 [1 favorite]
I took an extended break from working in 2012. I closed my brick and mortar shop, liquidated my inventory, and left the country. I had enough cash to bounce around Mexico and points south for over a year. I did not work, or look for work. I spent time reconnecting with myself and enjoying life. By the time the year was up I had connected with a group of people who were also traveling and we started a tech company that I worked at for the next 3 years.
I understand this is not your situation, but I just want to demonstrate that sometimes you just need a break and a change of perspective, and new opportunities can appear.
posted by ananci at 10:14 AM on March 29, 2023
I understand this is not your situation, but I just want to demonstrate that sometimes you just need a break and a change of perspective, and new opportunities can appear.
posted by ananci at 10:14 AM on March 29, 2023
I don't want to dissuade you from doing this, but I did wonder whether your employer would be open to an unpaid career break. I know a few people who have done these for between 3 and 12 months. They've all returned after their breaks, some stayed long-term with the organisation others moved onto other jobs pretty quickly.
I mean, if you're going to resign anyway, you may as well ask and see what might be on offer?
posted by plonkee at 11:25 AM on March 29, 2023 [3 favorites]
I mean, if you're going to resign anyway, you may as well ask and see what might be on offer?
posted by plonkee at 11:25 AM on March 29, 2023 [3 favorites]
I did and it worked out for me, but I'll caution that I hoped to get the next role in 3-6 months and it was almost a year. I did have the complication of looking for new jobs in one of three different geographic areas than I lived in. Post-Covid telecommuting may make things a little easier. That said, we're in an economic downturn and there's a lot of good people hitting the market (and rumors are swirling that tech companies are using it as an excuse to increase offshore work), so consider whether getting the next position will take longer than you hope.
Also worth noting, part of why it worked out for me is that I spent a huge portion of that year studying via Coursera, going to industry conferences, getting a scholarship for top level training, etc., so while I did take some time to relax and travel, it was definitely not a year of R&R.
I pulled the trigger in a good economy. I'm also risk averse and in the current one, I would not have done so. Good luck.
posted by Candleman at 1:39 PM on March 29, 2023 [1 favorite]
Also worth noting, part of why it worked out for me is that I spent a huge portion of that year studying via Coursera, going to industry conferences, getting a scholarship for top level training, etc., so while I did take some time to relax and travel, it was definitely not a year of R&R.
I pulled the trigger in a good economy. I'm also risk averse and in the current one, I would not have done so. Good luck.
posted by Candleman at 1:39 PM on March 29, 2023 [1 favorite]
It'll be alright.
I had a 3-month notice on my last move and had to sit through a month off.
It'll be alright.
I had a five-month break in 2017 when my Dad passed away and I needed time with family. I've got skills in demand and there's jobs going -- though I don't know how SEO will change with Large Language Model AI tools.
It'll be alright.
posted by k3ninho at 10:58 AM on March 31, 2023
I had a 3-month notice on my last move and had to sit through a month off.
It'll be alright.
I had a five-month break in 2017 when my Dad passed away and I needed time with family. I've got skills in demand and there's jobs going -- though I don't know how SEO will change with Large Language Model AI tools.
It'll be alright.
posted by k3ninho at 10:58 AM on March 31, 2023
This thread is closed to new comments.
The thing I would caution you about is that even with skills that are in demand, you may find it much harder to find a new job than you think. I found myself out of work for 3 months at the end of my degree last year and I was literally job hunting that entire time. It's a tough grind, especially in London. So if you're planning for say 4 months off, start low key looking for a new job around the 3rd month mark, that way you can take the pressure off and there's less risk you'll hit the end of your savings with nothing lined up.
I would also spend the time networking within the industry. If you can get into some cool projects, do so. Use it as a chance to look around at what else SEO can do and where else it can go (if you want to stay in the industry, that is). Would you be willing to look for work in other cities? Europe has some fine tech culture, I have multiple friends who have moved out of London in the last few years and have ended up in tech roles in Berlin and other European cities, where they can earn more and spend less.
posted by fight or flight at 3:40 AM on March 29, 2023 [4 favorites]