How do I approach people for advice on giving up on a career change?

March 27, 2023 2:49 PM

I went to grad school a few years back to change careers & 3 years later I haven’t found work & it’s time to reconsider returning to my old field. I want to make a final round of talking to my network & maybe to ask for “informational interviews” to ask for final suggestions/advice & if what I wanted is realistic. W/out coming across as a bummer or too negative, people don’t generally want to help people out that way, how can I approach people for professional advice about this w/ sincerity?

I’ve been working on entering this field for three years and it seems like I am just not a fit or what the field is looking for. I think I should start working on returning to my old field. You've seen many questions from me looking for career advice here previously.

I want to EMPHASIZE that this is not a post about low self-esteem (many of my friends have tried to pump me up to keep going), but it’s a post about being realistic. I’ve interviewed and been turned down so many times that this is the most realistic assessment of the situation that can be made. In fact, I may have held on to returning to my old career for way too long.

This isn’t anything awful. Yeah, it's disappointing, but I had a good career, in an interesting field and made good money. I feel like a lot of people in situations like this wouldn’t have the opportunity to return to a previous and solid career with stability and a good income. I’m not too down or beating myself up over anything. I liked my previous work but found something that I thought was more interesting and went back to grad school and it didn’t work out. Other than the sunk costs and lost time, I’m ok with this. I’ve also looked at some recent job postings in old field and in theory, I should be able to slide back into the actual work fairly easily. I had 13 years doing it. Additionally, some of the new skills I picked up in grad school have become valuable in the old field putting me in a more competitive position skill-wise. That’s pretty cool.

I’m going to make one more round of “informational interviews” with people in the new field and would like to be open and even possibly vulnerable, but I don’t want to turn anybody off in reaching out to have this conversation or come across like I have a negative attitude or anything along these lines. I believe that I’m realistically making a final assessment of my options and opportunities. Who knows? Maybe in this final run, I’ll come across something in the new field.

How might you recommend approaching something like this with a network? The relationships in my network range from pretty good relationships to acquaintances that have tried to help me out in the past. I appreciate the input and advice.

posted by Che boludo! to Work & Money (15 answers total)

Response by poster: Addendum: if it matters, I have some pretty distinct and unusual skills and experience and they just don't matter in the new field.

I should also add that I've tried hard to get in on the ground floor and have found myself losing these jobs to people just out of school with little professional experience. The last time this happened I applied for a "feeder" role to future career opportunities and lost out to a candidate one-year out of college with a bachelor's degree. I should have been a strong candidate but they addressed my experience and potential problems with job satisfaction in this entry-level role.
posted by Che boludo! at 2:54 PM on March 27, 2023

I'm trying to imagine someone who was attempting to shift into my field and was about to give up. Here are things I think they could ask me:

-Is my experience of trying to move into this field typical?
-Am I applying to the right kinds of positions?
-Have you seen candidates like me before, and how has it gone for them?
-How has hiring for these types of positions been over the last year or so?
-Is there anything I could do to bolster my experience or application?
-Are there any trends in this field more broadly that I might be missing that could be having an impact on my job search?
posted by bluedaisy at 3:06 PM on March 27, 2023 [9 favorites]

I read this a couple of times because I still wasn't quite sure what you wanted to do:

A. Reach out to your existing/old network about the feasibility of getting back into your old career?

B. Ask people you've met in new field if... They think it's a good idea for you to return to your old career??
They have any last minute advice to get into the new field before you return to your old career??

I think it's B, eg people in the new field, but I'm still not sure what you're wanting to ask them.



Finally - Getting a job is a good idea regardless. Employers prefer it if you're already employed, even if it's a different field. There's a tradeoff that that can leave people too exhausted for a thorough job hunt, but it's still seen as a plus. Seem to signal you weren't switching fields because of health or mental health problems which mean you now have trouble staying employed etc (which sucks, but it's still seen preferentially).
posted by Elysum at 3:13 PM on March 27, 2023 [1 favorite]

Response by poster: Sorry if I wasn't clear, The answer is B.

B. Ask people you've met in new field if... They think it's a good idea for you to return to your old career??
They have any last-minute advice to get into the new field before you return to your old career??

I think it's B, eg people in the new field, but I'm still not sure what you're wanting to ask them.

I want to approach new field contacts to ask for advice, but I feel if I reach out to ask about this that my message might come across as a bummer and people may not be open to responding to emails or LinkedIn messages.

I'd also like to keep doors open. I feel like I come across as a "sad sack" that it wouldn't leave a great impression for maintaining contact.

I've carefully brought up health issues before and didn't feel too comfortable. I've been working "survival" jobs and they have been really unreliable. I can really see how so many low-wage workers are living on the financial edge, unfortunately, that is becoming me.

Mods: I know as the OP I'm not supposed to keep jumping in, so I'm cutting myself off from this point forward.
posted by Che boludo! at 3:22 PM on March 27, 2023

Have you read "What color is your parachute?" It's got an entire extended section on informational interviewing and how to correctly approach it -- doing it correctly is more difficult than many people seem to think.

...I should warn you, the book is pretty "rah-rah-yay-you!" which can be grating, but there's a zillion copies floating around so you can probably get a recent printing for next-to-nothing and just read the bits on informational interviews.
posted by aramaic at 3:28 PM on March 27, 2023 [3 favorites]

So my understanding of informational interviews is that you wouldn't actually talk about yourself at all (maybe a brief introduction and then a tiny bit at the end.) Instead you're supposed to focus on that person's experience in the field.

I'd recommend you focus on transitions and critical skills. So first, I'd look for people who made a transition from another field, preferably one close to yours - do your research. Then you can ask something like:

- can you tell me about how you transitioned to this field from [their prior field]? Which aspects of your previous work were helpful and which were roadblocks? Did you experience any difficulty in getting your first role?
- which skills from your prior role help you stand out in this field?

and then maybe some things like:

- what's changed in the field since [year you were in grad school]?
- where do you see positions opening up right now and what critical skills are needed for those?
posted by warriorqueen at 4:00 PM on March 27, 2023 [1 favorite]

I don't know if my field applies to yours but if someone came to me with this, I would not expect them to be asking me about their own very specific personal decision about what should you do with your life kind of thing. More like you would be finding out if there are new opportunities you might not have heard about. But not "I've tried so hard and it's not working so maybe i should go back to previous field." That's more a conversation for friends, I think. Because everyone has a different tolerance for how long they can keep trying, and different tolerance for various odds, and they won't know how to advise you on that level.
posted by barnowl at 4:11 PM on March 27, 2023 [6 favorites]

Add questions like these to your general information interview framework:

"How common/uncommon is it for people to make a career change to enter into this field?"
"What advice do you have for people who made a career change to enter into this field?"
"What if any opportunities have you seen for people who made a career change to enter into this field?"
"What if any concerns would you have about people to made a career change to enter into this field?"
"What is the typical trajectory for a career in this field if there is one?"
"Are you aware of any professionals working in this field who made a career change into it? [If so:] Would you mind making introductions?"


The answers should tell you quite a bit. In fact, perhaps everything you want to know.
posted by desert exile at 4:34 PM on March 27, 2023 [1 favorite]

Hmm. I'm really not sure what you expect out of these conversations or what you think you will gain. Why is this a good use of anyone's time?

I think it's reasonable to meet with someone to debug your process if you think you might be going about job searching incorrectly, if you are trying to continue the job search but want it to get better results. But it seems you are past that point, right? You have decided the job search is no longer a good idea, and you're moving on. So...move on. You don't need to be networking with these people anymore. It's not useful for them to be involved in your postmortem analysis of why your career move didn't pan out.

My worry is that what you're actually doing is one last round of begging for leads so you don't have to give up on New Field, but you don't want to admit that to yourself. It's okay if that's what this is, I don't blame you as it sounds like you have made a significant investment trying to move to New Field and it would feel bad on a number of levels to end up working back in Old Field, but you'll be more effective at beating the bushes for that one last possibility if you're honest about it!

I think it's totally reasonable to say out loud, "I was really excited about New Field, and I gave it my all, but it just doesn't seem like the opportunities are as plentiful or as interesting as I wanted them to be. Meanwhile, Old Field has grown in a direction where I now actually see some interesting ways to apply New Field techniques and knowledge, so I think the past few years of learning and work make me a more attractive candidate/open up more senior or specialized roles/etc." I just don't see why you would say that to people working in New Field, right? You are trying to impress people in Old Field now. Save this spiel for your interviews, methinks.

FWIW, I'm in a similar position of having recently kinda given up on a career pivot. It feels bad! But it is what it is. And I do think I am more useful in my old line of work because of the last few years working on the new stuff. I definitely did a final round of "am I seeing what I think I'm seeing???" meetings with my New Field friends before I took the plunge back into an Old Field role. But it was more of a "is this writing I'm seeing on the wall as clear to you as it is to me?" gut check about the relative viability of these career paths than an informational interview.
posted by potrzebie at 5:07 PM on March 27, 2023 [7 favorites]

Do you have a mentor in your new field? Are there any professional associations or faculty from your grad program that you could seek mentorship from? I think the type of honest advice you're seeking would come from someone who knows the field and knows you, at least a little bit, might be hard to get from a first time informational interview conversation. You need guidance from someone who knows you and cares about your career, I'd work on fostering those sort of relationships even if you go back to old field in the meantime.
posted by emd3737 at 5:39 PM on March 27, 2023 [1 favorite]

The biggest unknown for anyone trying to advise you is you; only you can know your attitude, training, skill, interest, life circumstances, time horizon, additional skills and interests, willingness and ability to adapt, range of salary -- you can possibly communicate one or more of these to someone advising you, but not all. Ultimately, any decision even assessment has to come from you.

So, what else do you need to know to make a good choice for yourself? Ask people those things.

No need to be self-deprecating. You don't even need to explain why you're asking, initially, but if you do end up explaining why you're asking -- it's because you're looking for the most positive way to move forward. It's great that you have options! Maybe someone you talk to would consider a change _to_ your first career.
posted by amtho at 5:54 PM on March 27, 2023

What are the friends (acquaintances?)from grad school doing? I’ve found that it’s actually my peers that are far more useful in networking than people at higher levels. People in higher levels entered when the job market was completely different or the field has changed trajectories so much that their old entry level jobs literally don’t exist anymore, or they were able to do it with just an associates rather than the masters that is now required. The people who were in grad school with you should ideally contain at least a few friends who can give you some honest feedback.
posted by raccoon409 at 6:10 PM on March 27, 2023 [7 favorites]

I've tried hard to get in on the ground floor and have found myself losing these jobs to people just out of school with little professional experience.

If you haven't been applying to positions higher up the ladder, you should. People often underplay their value after a career change. You're likely much more qualified for a more senior role.
posted by Miko at 6:45 PM on March 27, 2023 [4 favorites]

It sounds like right now you are working, but in a low-paid and unsatisfying job that's unrelated to either the new field or the old field? How would taking a job in the old field make you any weaker a candidate for the new field than you are today? Why wouldn't getting a better job in old field, to replace your current crappy job, but also continuing to keep an eye out for good opportunities in new field, be a good combination of both worlds?
posted by kickingtheground at 7:00 PM on March 27, 2023 [2 favorites]

So you’re going to go back to your contacts in New Industry and say hey, it turns out getting a job in this field is too hard so I’m going to quit, do you think I’m making the right decision? Yeah…don’t do that.

It sounds like you’re asking for reassurance not to do that because you’ll be hired eventually and obviously no one can promise that. They also can’t tell you that it’s time to give up either, only you know if that’s the right call and it’s not very professional to put put someone else in that position. No one is going to beg you to stick it out.

If you do go and talk to your network, I’d be asking questions like, with my qualifications what level and jobs should I be applying to that will give me the best chance of being hired (it may be that you’re not targeting the right roles) and how can I make myself the strongest possible candidate whether it’s interviewing techniques, brushing up your resume or meeting different people. Ask them where you’re falling down.

Of course if you have indeed decided to go back to your old career path then then there’s no point doing any of this. No need to announce it as you’re walking out the door, just get down to business getting a job in your old field.
posted by Jubey at 9:27 PM on March 27, 2023 [2 favorites]