Men's cocktail dress starter pack
December 26, 2022 5:56 AM Subscribe
I have two events in the first quarter of 2023 that have a cocktail dress code stipulated. (One is a wedding and the other is a farewell event for a boss.) However I own nothing suitable to wear (including footwear) and I'm pretty clueless as to how to go about acquiring it. What should I buy, and where would you recommend I buy it from? I'm a man and I'm willing to spend more for nicer clothes (up to a point).
For men, cocktail attire typically means a suit and tie, with a broad spectrum of casual to formal.
The simplest way to get a cocktail attire outfit is to go to a store like Men's Warehouse or Jos A Banks. They can get you fitted & tailored for a suit, two shirts, ties, and shoes. Department stores like Macy's or Dillard's might also be an option but IMO they have been getting worse and worse. My husband always has a good sales & customer service experience at Men's Warehouse, their suits used to be pretty unfashionable but I was impressed last time he was there.
posted by muddgirl at 7:17 AM on December 26, 2022 [2 favorites]
The simplest way to get a cocktail attire outfit is to go to a store like Men's Warehouse or Jos A Banks. They can get you fitted & tailored for a suit, two shirts, ties, and shoes. Department stores like Macy's or Dillard's might also be an option but IMO they have been getting worse and worse. My husband always has a good sales & customer service experience at Men's Warehouse, their suits used to be pretty unfashionable but I was impressed last time he was there.
posted by muddgirl at 7:17 AM on December 26, 2022 [2 favorites]
If you like to read about such stuff, Put This On can be a good resource. There is a lot there but stick with the basics and their thought processes on how to pick basic, timeless, quality pieces.
posted by mmascolino at 7:37 AM on December 26, 2022 [3 favorites]
posted by mmascolino at 7:37 AM on December 26, 2022 [3 favorites]
You can’t go too wrong by going to Jos A Banks and getting a single breasted navy suit. If you get asked more questions on style or preferences say you want a “classic” look. Choose something that works with a belt rather than suspenders. (Though sometimes they’re made to have the option for either).
You can wear different colored shirts with the suit, but if you want to blend in (and that’s what I’m guessing here, rather than making a statement) get some white dress shirts these will NOT have buttons on the collar flappy bits, but rather collar stays).
You can really pick just about any tie you would like, and typically this is your chance to have “fun” as a guy.
For socks, you can either choose something that matches the tie (and often they will be displayed this way) or you can just get black socks.
For shoes, you can do either a dark brown or a black, i think dark brown looks nicer, but it’s up to you. Your belt should match the color of your shoes.
You can buy all of the above at Jos A Banks. If you want something nicer, go to Brook’s Brothers.
If you have a friend who can shop with you (make or female) sometimes it’s helpful to have a second set of eyes. At most stores they will offer in house tailoring which helps the suit to really looks good. However this takes a little time. Go shopping 3 weeks before the event, so youre not stressed about timing.
posted by raccoon409 at 8:06 AM on December 26, 2022 [6 favorites]
You can wear different colored shirts with the suit, but if you want to blend in (and that’s what I’m guessing here, rather than making a statement) get some white dress shirts these will NOT have buttons on the collar flappy bits, but rather collar stays).
You can really pick just about any tie you would like, and typically this is your chance to have “fun” as a guy.
For socks, you can either choose something that matches the tie (and often they will be displayed this way) or you can just get black socks.
For shoes, you can do either a dark brown or a black, i think dark brown looks nicer, but it’s up to you. Your belt should match the color of your shoes.
You can buy all of the above at Jos A Banks. If you want something nicer, go to Brook’s Brothers.
If you have a friend who can shop with you (make or female) sometimes it’s helpful to have a second set of eyes. At most stores they will offer in house tailoring which helps the suit to really looks good. However this takes a little time. Go shopping 3 weeks before the event, so youre not stressed about timing.
posted by raccoon409 at 8:06 AM on December 26, 2022 [6 favorites]
Jos A Banks and Men's Warehouse are both the same company now, and you can go to whichever is easier for you. Both have good sales, so do shop a sale! I wouldn't buy shoes there though.
posted by DarlingBri at 8:18 AM on December 26, 2022
posted by DarlingBri at 8:18 AM on December 26, 2022
Where I live, cocktail dress doesn't require a suit (though there will certainly be people there in suits, and you wouldn't go wrong by wearing one).
You could also do, like, a blazer, tie, dress shirt in white or blue (you could also skip the tie and wear a different color/kind of shirt, but that's kind of playing on expert mode, and from your question I don't think you want to do that), pants that are neither jeans nor suit pants, and shoes that are neither sneakers nor full-on dress brogues. As raccoon409 says, shoes and belt should match (with the same caveat about expert mode).
If you live in or near an urban part of the US, there's at least one independent store that specializes in menswear. It will probably be more expensive than Brooks Brothers, but it will also be nicer stuff, and the people who work there will might be more familiar with local customs about these kinds of things (e.g., places where a cowboy boot would work as part of this look, or where things run more or less formal).
posted by box at 9:21 AM on December 26, 2022 [2 favorites]
You could also do, like, a blazer, tie, dress shirt in white or blue (you could also skip the tie and wear a different color/kind of shirt, but that's kind of playing on expert mode, and from your question I don't think you want to do that), pants that are neither jeans nor suit pants, and shoes that are neither sneakers nor full-on dress brogues. As raccoon409 says, shoes and belt should match (with the same caveat about expert mode).
If you live in or near an urban part of the US, there's at least one independent store that specializes in menswear. It will probably be more expensive than Brooks Brothers, but it will also be nicer stuff, and the people who work there will might be more familiar with local customs about these kinds of things (e.g., places where a cowboy boot would work as part of this look, or where things run more or less formal).
posted by box at 9:21 AM on December 26, 2022 [2 favorites]
I’ll also add in the if you show up and you feel over dressed in comparison to others you can take off your jacket and tie, undoing the first button or two. Men’s suiting is nicely flexible in that way.
posted by raccoon409 at 9:53 AM on December 26, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by raccoon409 at 9:53 AM on December 26, 2022 [2 favorites]
I'd definitely seek out another guy who will be attending one of the events to get another opinion.
posted by SemiSalt at 10:12 AM on December 26, 2022
posted by SemiSalt at 10:12 AM on December 26, 2022
Several guy friends of mine have been over the moon about their indochino made to measure suits. If you life in or near a city, they may have an in-store location where you can get measured in person to make it even easier.
posted by justjess at 7:07 PM on December 26, 2022
posted by justjess at 7:07 PM on December 26, 2022
Go for the french cuffs- because cufflinks are cool.
posted by ergomatic at 9:23 PM on December 26, 2022
posted by ergomatic at 9:23 PM on December 26, 2022
Men's Wearhouse, or book a free stylist session at Nordstrom.
posted by Iris Gambol at 4:38 PM on December 27, 2022
posted by Iris Gambol at 4:38 PM on December 27, 2022
Bonobos makes excellent stuff in this realm as well.
posted by Thistledown at 7:53 PM on December 27, 2022
posted by Thistledown at 7:53 PM on December 27, 2022
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posted by seawallrunner at 7:00 AM on December 26, 2022