Sports/family loyalties question

January 4, 2022 6:34 AM

My son attends Merrimack College; my cousin plays hockey for Clarkson University. My son invited me to watch the game between the two schools. Do I cheer for Merrimack (the home team and my hosts's school), or Clarkson (for whom my cousin is skating)? This is partly facetious, partly serious.

Adding another dimension, my son invited me to the game as a Christmas gift, but my cousin can get us ticket for free.

And on the third hand, my son can hear & see me, but my cousin probably cannot.

posted by wenestvedt to Human Relations (28 answers total)

Cheer with your son. You have a closer allegiance to him than to your cousin.
posted by girlmightlive at 6:38 AM on January 4, 2022 [10 favorites]

You never cheer for Clarkson hockey.
posted by bowbeacon at 6:38 AM on January 4, 2022 [8 favorites]

Best answer: I think the move here is to appreciate the game and the sportsmanship evident on the rink, without partiality. This can be an exercise in indifference, which I feel is a virtue in short supply these days.
posted by gauche at 6:39 AM on January 4, 2022 [12 favorites]

If you're going to be sitting in the home team section, cheer with the home team. And vice versa.
posted by matkline at 6:45 AM on January 4, 2022 [2 favorites]

You could alternate by quarters, swap hats or some such.
posted by nickggully at 6:48 AM on January 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

Reach out to them both and ask them each to give you 500 words about why you should cheer for their team. Without telling them why you're doing so, cheer for the one with the fewest grammar errors in their essay.
posted by bondcliff at 6:50 AM on January 4, 2022 [9 favorites]

Your son invited you, cheer for Merrimack.

Just look at this ragtag bunch of scrappy underdogs, or perhaps lovable losers (or maybe they're favored, hell if I know)!

They have two Zachs, two Liams, two Hugos, and one of the Hugos is a goalie who's a)6'8", b)a freshman, and c)Swedish. I'm already writing the movie script.
posted by box at 6:52 AM on January 4, 2022 [8 favorites]

Be that person who has face paint for each team, divided right down the middle.
posted by craniac at 6:59 AM on January 4, 2022 [13 favorites]

It's perfectly fine to be neutral as the game begins and pick a team to root for as it unfolds. You aren't beholden to anyone for allegiance, and can pick your own criteria, or stay neutral and just hope for an entertaining game.
posted by OHenryPacey at 7:14 AM on January 4, 2022 [2 favorites]

Best answer: I don’t think that the team matters much as long as you’re being a good sport in general, but you should definitely cheer for the cousin in particular if they do something cool, and say a nice thing to them about their playing afterwards.
posted by tchemgrrl at 7:21 AM on January 4, 2022 [8 favorites]

Cheer for the underdog!
posted by Grither at 7:36 AM on January 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

I think once the game is occurring you'll have a gut feeling emerge pretty quickly. Just see where it takes you.
posted by something something at 7:51 AM on January 4, 2022 [2 favorites]

Best answer: Cheer for home team and your cousin when he gets in, see if you can wear two pieces of clothing one for each team -scarf, jersey, hat etc.
posted by sandmanwv at 7:54 AM on January 4, 2022 [2 favorites]

Best answer: Cheer for your son's team, get excited when your cousin specifically does something cool.
posted by nebulawindphone at 8:28 AM on January 4, 2022 [3 favorites]

Best answer: Cheer for both. You don't have to be a jerk and boo one team to cheer another. I don't really get involved with sports, and I cheer for both teams. It pisses everyone off, but who cares?
posted by Geckwoistmeinauto at 8:43 AM on January 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

Best answer: Just boo the refs, both teams will love that
posted by bbqturtle at 8:54 AM on January 4, 2022 [4 favorites]

Best answer: Cheer them both, impartially. A good play is good for a hurrah whoever makes it.

Cheer only when they both are doing something amazing.
posted by Jane the Brown at 9:04 AM on January 4, 2022 [2 favorites]

Cheer for both!
posted by kimberussell at 9:15 AM on January 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

You may be able to attend without picking a side and just go and have a good time with your son. I imagine that you may be inspired to cheer along with your son if he is cheering and also that you may be happy to see your cousin do well.

With respect to the ticket, if you are asking if you should pursue the free one--if your son has bought tickets already, then you probably don't need any more tickets. If he has not bought tickets, and your cousin can get you two tickets, you could mention it to your son and ask him if he wants you to look into the free ones. (He may not, if the tickets from your cousin are for assigned seats, they may put you in the parent section for your cousin's team, which could make it harder for your son to freely cheer for his team.)

I hope you have fun at the game!
posted by bruinfan at 9:44 AM on January 4, 2022 [3 favorites]

I agree with kimberussel!
Porque no los dos?
posted by alchemist at 10:15 AM on January 4, 2022 [2 favorites]

As someone who had to live in Potsdam, NY (home of Clarkson U) for two years and DID NOT ENJOY IT, I am tempted to tell you to boo Clarkson.

That said, they have a solid hockey team and those games were always fun to attend. (Not usually a hockey fan, but you make your own fun when you live in a village of 10K people.)

I think something something is right that you might have a gut instinct once you're watching. If not, cheer for both! If people give you crap, cheerfully explain your family connections. Have fun!
posted by leftover_scrabble_rack at 11:26 AM on January 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

If you want to sink some money into it, you can get a split jersey a la Phyllis Harrell, AKA Mama McCourty, mother of twin NFL players.
posted by Gray Duck at 11:26 AM on January 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

Response by poster: For the record, very few spectators are expected at the game: it's still winter break. And we will be sitting in the visitors' section -- but it's not like hundred of CU fans will caravan to North Andover for this one anyway! So I don't expect this to be a lot of drama.

Thanks to all of you for reminding me that hockey fans are pretty cool folks, and that I should put sportsmanship over partisanship. I grew up watching University of Minnesota hockey in the old barn, so I know how to chant abuse, but now I Am Grown Up so I really ought to behave. :7)
posted by wenestvedt at 1:38 PM on January 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

Response by poster: (In the spirit of fairness, I have given every answer a Favorite!)
posted by wenestvedt at 1:40 PM on January 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

I would cheer for whichever team had fewer fans cheering, and, if there are few fans at all, I'd just plain cheer.
posted by dpx.mfx at 2:21 PM on January 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

My mom used to say that games were the most fun to watch when she didn't actually care which team won. (So, counterintuitively, the years the 49ers didn't make it into the Super Bowl were the best years, as I remember?)

I'd suggest cheering for good plays, good teamwork, and good sportsmanship, and definitely cheering any specific good move your cousin makes.
posted by Lexica at 3:06 PM on January 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

Best answer: Cheer for Jake Durflinger's mustache, if nothing else.
posted by donpardo at 5:37 PM on January 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

Response by poster: On one hand, I am lucky to have avoided this entire dilemma because my cousin got COVID, and the game was cancelled.

On the other hand, my cousin got COVID. :7( Also, I think this was his last year of eligibility, so I won't get to see him on the ice. *sigh*
posted by wenestvedt at 11:28 AM on January 14, 2022