Do people with penises really use the dick hole?

October 1, 2021 11:42 PM

I don't have a penis. My penis-having partner rarely uses the actual hole in his boxer shorts to pee through and instead just undoes his pants/fly and pushes his waistband down, whether he's at a public urinal or at home. I asked him if other people do this and he didn't know ("I never look!") which made sense, but now I'm curious. Do you use the hole in your underwear to pee through, or just end-run it in some other way. Do you have a sense of whether others do this?
posted by anonymous to Clothing, Beauty, & Fashion (51 answers total)

My understanding is that if you’ve got on a fancy button-up shirt tucked into fancy-belted fancypants, the hole could be helpful?
posted by sunrise kingdom at 12:20 AM on October 2, 2021 [3 favorites]

I never use the fly. It's much quicker to do as your penis-partner does, and pull the shorts down a bit. Seems silly saying this, but it's a bit of a challenge maneuvering one's willie through that small opening, and every split-second counts when you're in a hurry to pee.
posted by Doug Holland at 12:20 AM on October 2, 2021 [11 favorites]

Always use the fly, never buy underwear without it.
posted by Klipspringer at 12:59 AM on October 2, 2021 [5 favorites]

I unzip/unbutton the fly on my trousers & then pull down the waistband. But, I wear trunks that don’t have a hole, so not much choice in my case.
posted by rd45 at 1:15 AM on October 2, 2021

I never need to undo my pants.

If I'm wearing boxers, I'll use the fly, because it's just a gap right there that's easy to use (most of mine don't have buttons). With the vast majority of brief/boxerbrief style flies, it's easier to just pull down the waistband. I've had a few pairs with an alternate design for the fly that did actually work well and I'd use it then. Most of my tight fitting underwear doesn't have a fly so pulling down the waistband was the only option.
posted by Candleman at 1:22 AM on October 2, 2021 [1 favorite]

Yes, although I tend to avoid boxers with a simple buttoned slot and go for ones that overlap a bit at at the front, because they're much easier and more secure.

Partially because there's a small but terrible risk of some elasticated boxers slipping and accidentally springing back up while mid-flow, which can be catastrophic.
posted by BinaryApe at 1:43 AM on October 2, 2021 [9 favorites]

I use the fly in the undies. Done the other way I don't like the elastic waistband pushing up on the underside of the winky. It's less of a faf to use the fly
posted by biffa at 2:28 AM on October 2, 2021 [2 favorites]

Waistband pulled down, thumb held under to prevent pushing as mentioned above.
posted by Wrinkled Stumpskin at 2:32 AM on October 2, 2021 [2 favorites]

What BinaryAge said about the elastic risk.

At a urinal, I do use the underwear fly, but also fully unbutton and unzip my pants, because I mostly wear jeans and the fly of the jeans is not really an adequate opening.

When a regular toilet is available, I'll usually sit down for general convenience and comfort.
posted by JimN2TAW at 2:33 AM on October 2, 2021 [1 favorite]

Other than boxers it's usually easier to use the leg'ole: and safer for avoiding elastic splashback alluded to above. A recent development is to install a single tiny button in the fly of the boxers; my enormous . . . fingers are unable to open this, so I never close it but I do use the designated hole. Seems the time to share Rowan "punk" Atkinson trying to find the right zip.
posted by BobTheScientist at 3:11 AM on October 2, 2021

Somehow I had an argument about this in a very large and active chatroom like 2 months ago. Out of 30 guys, only 2 used the dick hole, and the other 28 use the "slouch the pants" method.
posted by bbqturtle at 3:34 AM on October 2, 2021 [7 favorites]

This came up on the Giant Beastcast, where people acted like the guy that pulls down his shorts (Vinny) was insane. Turns out he was, because he thought the fly was just a gusset, unsafe for use. A relatively large audience was shocked that there is even a question or competing camps. I guess no one looks.

I wear tighty whities and I never use the fly on that layer. I always used the fly on boxers. In gym shorts, I'll just pee out both layers of leg hole. (Not both leg holes...you get what I mean.) My current partner tries to use all layers of fly during bedtime times, which sometimes works.
posted by Snijglau at 3:46 AM on October 2, 2021 [1 favorite]

I very rarely use the underwear hole. The exception: If I am in some sort of formal/complex outfit and pulling down whatever pants I have on would create more work than using the hole, I would use it.
posted by solarion at 4:24 AM on October 2, 2021 [1 favorite]

When outside in extremely cold temperatures, it's convenient. The flaps on thermal carheart overalls definitely get used.

(Indoors, personally, the bathroom is a fine place to re-tuck my shirt, which more or less always needs re-tucking anyway.)
posted by eotvos at 4:43 AM on October 2, 2021

Always wear boxers of one type or another. Always use the fly.
posted by slkinsey at 4:56 AM on October 2, 2021

I can't seem to find the question browsing through my history, but I swear this question was asked on metafilter many years ago. Pretty sure the question was asking what this hole was even for.

I've always used the fly hole since I was old enough to wear underpants with a fly hole.

Before I saw it asked, I didn't even realize there were people who did not use it for its intended purpose. I learned a lot about humans that day.
posted by jozxyqk at 5:05 AM on October 2, 2021 [3 favorites]

I pretty much always use the underwear hole unless I'm wearing sweatpants or similar that don't have a fly on which case I just pull both layers down together
posted by crocomancer at 5:06 AM on October 2, 2021 [1 favorite]

Have tried the fly hole method, not a fan. Usually much easier to pull things down.
posted by jzb at 5:27 AM on October 2, 2021

Either. I can’t even think which I do most often! This is partly because a lot of my underwear is almost identical except some have the fly hole and some don’t.
posted by fabius at 5:43 AM on October 2, 2021

Previously
posted by phunniemee at 5:46 AM on October 2, 2021 [5 favorites]

Thank you phunniemee , I knew I remembered it, and must have scrolled past it in my history search.

Here was my answer in 2006.
posted by jozxyqk at 5:53 AM on October 2, 2021

For me, using the fly opening in any kind of underpants is just too time consuming. The only time I did was the same time I caught myself in the zipper of my jeans.
posted by james33 at 5:53 AM on October 2, 2021

I'll use the fly, if I'm wearing both pants and underwear that have them. If I'm in long pants and lack a passage on one or both, I'll pull down the top of the obstructing garment(s). If I'm in shorts, I'll yank a leg hole up and to the side instead.
posted by jordemort at 6:44 AM on October 2, 2021

I have never, ever, ever used the hole to pee through. If the two cloth layers have sufficient overlap, it is kind of difficult and awkward to negotiate my dick through both layers. It also makes it much more difficult to, uh, shake the last drops of pee off my dick, and much more likely that I will shake urine droplets onto my clothes.

What's worse is when the two cloth layers do NOT have sufficient overlap. If you are unlucky enough to have underwear like that, your dick and sometimes your balls will sort of... shimmy their way out of the hole while you're sitting at a desk, or walking down the sidewalk, or giving a presentation at work. When that happens you have to stop everything, stuff your hand (occasionally both hands) down your pants, and disentangle the rigging... or just grin and bear it until you can escape to the bathroom.

Just get rid of the hole, is what I'm saying.
posted by cubeb at 6:46 AM on October 2, 2021 [2 favorites]

The fly is so you can tell the front from the back.
posted by Obscure Reference at 6:47 AM on October 2, 2021 [7 favorites]

Wow I had no idea so many people were doing this wrong!
posted by SaltySalticid at 6:51 AM on October 2, 2021 [12 favorites]

I use it anytime I don't want to unbutton my pants or belt. Someone already mentioned avoiding the need to re-tuck your shirt. I also have a few pairs of pants that are loose enough enough that they won't stay up when unbuttoned (like, at all- even if held on one side, the other hip will drop way down my thigh), so going through the fly saves a lot of awkward pants wrangling.
posted by Jobst at 6:54 AM on October 2, 2021

My husband just pulls down the waistband of his underwear. My dad, however, apparently uses the dick hole. My mom one time sewed the fly of his underwear shut as a joke. He was so mad when he came home from work... "I stood there at the urinal with my hand fumbling around in my fly for so long, it looked like I was playing with myself!" LOL
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 6:56 AM on October 2, 2021 [5 favorites]

Like eotvos my fly using activities are pretty much limited to sub zero temperature use.
posted by Mitheral at 6:56 AM on October 2, 2021

I wear boxers and always use the fly. That’s what it’s for, to minimize having to undo any clothing or yank it out of place.

Are there some people in this thread implying that they undo their belt to use a urinal?! That way lies madness.
posted by ejs at 7:00 AM on October 2, 2021

Our collective best friend solves this problem by going commando. He is a literal cowboy. I once asked him just how that actually works when you’re riding horses and trying to keep everything situated, and he said "very carefully and you get used to it."
posted by joycehealy at 7:07 AM on October 2, 2021 [1 favorite]

Unzip fly on outer pants, pull down waistband on underwear- have never used the fly on underwear.
posted by Larry David Syndrome at 7:09 AM on October 2, 2021 [1 favorite]

When you wear boxers and have complicated garb on, it can make sense, but with briefs it ends up being overcomplicated and fussy unless you're really motivated, IMHO.
posted by wotsac at 7:31 AM on October 2, 2021

Count me as always tighty-whiteys and pull down the waistband.

There does seem to be a notable difference between people wearing boxers and briefs.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 7:31 AM on October 2, 2021

If we didn't have elastics we would probably be a lot more liable to use the fly. I suspect that using the fly is going steadily out of practice due to the historic changes in clothing construction and the growing intolerance of men peeing wherever and whenever. Peeing outside is awkward because you are exposed and you run the risk of getting chilblains. If you can't recall the last time you peed outside then it is not surprising that you are comfortable with lowering everything, as you are probably always in a heated location where nobody is going to come out yelling about not doing it up against their wall. Of the men that do piss outside, many of them only do so when very drunk out of necessity.


Back in the medieval era it was considered appropriate for men to lift their skirts and piss towards the middle of the street, not towards a wall. The middle of the street would be the deepest part of the gutter so best for run off. All the horses and donkeys and oxen and mules were pissing in the street and that was where their piss ended up. Rain or a few buckets of water would send it all sloshing farther along; you could toss any only garbage into the gutter. Pudding Lane in London got that name because it was where the butchers killed and processed the carcasses of pigs. The puddings were the entrails and inedible internal organs such as the bladder and they were simply tossed into the street. You could also buy pigs bladders to pack with chopped meat and oatmeal and boil to make a boiled pudding which is how we got the word pudding into the language as meaning something to eat. On a bad day you were wading through it all, complete with greedy flies buzzing over everything in sight. This way of disposing of offal sounds horrifically unsanitary, and it was. At the same time a decent man wouldn't dream of pissing against a wall, because that wall belonged to some poor householder who wouldn't appreciate it and would have to clean up after him. You faced the other people and let it fly.

Back in that medieval era men did not wear trousers, they wore hose which were separate and tied on to a belt with strings called points. The skirts of their tunic would provide modesty, everything got lots of ventilation and you didn't have to worry about crapping your drawers because you didn't have any to leave a skid mark. If you needed to do something very active that involved a lot of lunging, such as an impromptu sword fight, you either slashed your points or quickly untied them so that you enough freedom of movement to dodge.

As the centuries rolled on the length of the garments men wore got shorter and shorter until they looked like very small boys who at that time ran around with their junk hanging out, with the hem coming just above the splash zone. At this point the hose became more substantial and extended as far as the waist not just to the top of the thigh. The compromise between modesty and accessibility was the codpiece, which also performed the function of a jock, keeping your balls from bouncing around. If you had something precious such as a couple of silver pennies, but didn't have a purse to carry them in, they went into the cod. Pretty sure the cod in that instance was a euphemism for the prick. One of the most common euphemisms for a prick in history was to call it a fish. There is an ancient bit of writing from the pre-classical era that scholars initially translated as "He put a hot fish in her navel."

At any rate, codpieces were not long on the scene, being featured only during the Tudor or Renaissance period, and not for all of it and not in all European locations. After the cod piece we came to the fall front breeches, with two rows of buttons. The breeches were not divided up the back at all, the way the hose had been. Like with the cod you dropped the flap, out it stuck and you could piss away, but it was now definitely not separate from the two legs of the garment. Also like the cod, under the flap was the place you could store your small valuables. There were often pockets built into these breeches which could only be accessed through the flap. When the breeches where buttoned up tight the pockets were buttoned up behind it too.

In the late Victorian era there was very much an attitude that he should not have easy access to it, and should develop enough fortitude and repression that no woman ever saw it after he was a man. The attitude was impractical and unpopular enough that it was not universal but good middle class people aspired to it. There were many parents who would not let their children touch their own genitals. Freud analyzed one small boy who was not permitted to hold his own dick when he peed, lest the sensations lead him to the abyss of masturbation, which everyone knew led to insanity because the lunatic asylums where filled with profoundly disabled men who sat there incarcerated with nothing to do, masturbating to comfort themselves and alleviate the boredom. In order to spare your three year old son from embarking down the path that led to that, whatever female care taker was in charge of him would hold and aim his dick instead. From our current point we conclude that not being allowed to touch it and having specially constructed underwear that you couldn't open on your own, and having your older sister or your mother or the servant woman handling it multiple times a day was apt to lead to such a neurotic complex that it was more likely to set you on the path to the lunatic asylum than to prevent it.


Public health and attitudes to flashers have very much changed how much access a guy is intended to have to his junk when in public. One hundred and fifty years ago exhibitionists were able to whip it out wherever and when ever and claim they just took it out to piss and it was not their fault that girl was staring at them, even after they had stalked her and backed her into a corner where she couldn't avoid it. So as we moved into the Edwardian era, public urination became something that you could be charged with as a misdemeanor crime. That way you couldn't claim that all you were doing was emptying your bladder when you were found with it hanging out while standing in the shrubbery under someone woman's bedroom window. A side bonus of such by-laws was that it added a way to harass and control homeless men. Not that they needed much. You could be arrested for not having a fixed address (vagrancy), not having a job (non-support) or not being able to prove you had the funds to pay for a accommodation. In the days when a cot in a shelter cost a nickle, homeless men would carry a nickle they didn't spend and sleep rough. The nickle was their talisman against arrest.

Of course perfectly respectable men who were out and about would need to pee too, so we got the construction of pissoirs and vespasiennes and public washrooms and municipal by-laws that certain establishments had to provide facilities where people could relieve themselves.

I think the zipper is one reason why fewer and fewer men use their fly. You can get it caught in a zipper. Probably only happens to one small boy in one hundred, and only once, but that sensation of zipper teeth grating against where a guy is most sensitive is still a deterrent against using the smallest possible opening to stick it through. People who design clothes are now putting fly fronts into things only to make it easier to take them on and off, or because it's traditional to make them that way, rather than with any sense of the utility. I have even seen boxer shorts with a fly front that is a dummy front. It's not that the fly is sewn up, but that there was never an opening there in the first place, even while the stitching is there to make it look like you could. The practice of pissing outside, like the practice of spitting, is now frowned upon instead of assumed necessary. This means the clothes we wear are not at all properly designed to allow for it.

I think you might find that the older you are the more likely you are to be a man who uses your fly to piss. The practice is probably a survival from an earlier era.
posted by Jane the Brown at 8:29 AM on October 2, 2021 [36 favorites]

Jane the Brown, as far as I know it was usual for medieval men to wear shorts called braies under their hose, so they were not naked beneath their tunics. The braies had a fly. And showy codpieces were short-lived, but codpieces lasted a couple centuries; they were necessary as long as men were wearing hose with doublets too short to cover.

To answer the question: I wear boxers and always use the fly. Having anything, pants or shorts, pressing up against the underside of things creates an unwanted angle in the works that leads to additional dripping after the fact.
posted by agentofselection at 9:56 AM on October 2, 2021 [3 favorites]

I'm middle-aged and was going over the waistband for a long time in my youth, but eventually I discovered the utility of the fly in my 20s.

Couple of reasons occur to me:
I carry a lot of shit in my pockets, and sometimes on the belt itself, so as soon as the belt is opened, pants are falling all around from the weight of my pocket litter, so now I've got to manage my pants as well as my penis. I can manage it, but why do that when I can fob that job off on the belt I paid for?
If I open my belt/pants-button/zipper, and then shove down the elastic waistband of my underpants (several different types when I was a young man), the arc of my urine was hazardously close to the loose, sometimes limp ends of the belt.

I did eventually learn to keep my pants closed, open fly, pull down the waistband.. not a massive improvement, due to the possibility of snapback: If you are inattentive and lose your grip or position of the underwear elastic, it'll snap back against your penis somewhere below the head, which means it can pin it in the upward-pointed position, mid-pee. It happened a few times. It's not memorably painful, but, pee, going straight up, is the problem. Pissing yourself is a greater risk with when you are defying a stretched elastic waistband.

Nowadays when winter comes, I even like to put on some long underwear, and I always get the kind with the y-front so I can open my fly, use my hand to navigate past 3 entrances (pants, longjohns, briefs, and hold all those open while I go). I don't begrudge that for an instant.

(Also, I'm a t-shirts/jeans kinda guy; I'm not wearing clothing from another era designed for the fly. No codpieces either.)
posted by Sunburnt at 10:08 AM on October 2, 2021 [1 favorite]

Are there some people in this thread implying that they undo their belt to use a urinal?

I use suspenders rather than a belt.
posted by Mitheral at 10:17 AM on October 2, 2021 [2 favorites]

I don't wear boxers anymore, but it really depended on 1) how tight my pants were, 2) how big the fly was.

Loose pants, large fly? Use the fly. Tight pants - unbutton, and usually over the top unless the fly was unusually large.
posted by porpoise at 11:38 AM on October 2, 2021

Fly always. I can't believe how many people open their pants when it's 100x easier and faster to unzip, pop out, and pee. Dealing with belts, pant flaps, and shirts flying around I wonder how many are peeing on their clothes or worse having their clothes smacking into the urinals.
posted by wile e at 11:44 AM on October 2, 2021

I was curious enough to call and ask my boyfriend : he normally goes commando, but when he does wear underwear he uses the hole in boxers, but not boxer-briefs because there's "too much finagling".
posted by Sparky Buttons at 12:02 PM on October 2, 2021

I used to pull down my waistband right up to the point where I started wearing belts more regularly, and after that point I realized how much more convenient it was to just use the fly hole. I think part of the problem is no one really taught me what the hole is for and so I didn't come to the realization until pretty late in life.
posted by Aleyn at 1:46 PM on October 2, 2021

Tighty-whitey briefs exclusively. Never use the fly hole. Never have in six decades. Too hard to maneuver Dr. Jekyll out of that little hole.

Any indoor peeing: Unzip pants. Through pants fly, left thumb pulls down waistband of underwear. Right hand positions Dr. Jekyll. Do what is needed. Shake off any drops. Return the doctor to his quarters. Zip up pants.

First time in my life I have ever typed out the steps.
posted by wjm at 3:16 PM on October 2, 2021 [1 favorite]

Are there some people in this thread implying that they undo their belt to use a urinal?

If at all humanly possible I avoid using urinals. Not a fan.
posted by jzb at 3:49 PM on October 2, 2021 [1 favorite]

Little boys pull their pants down to piss. Team fly.
posted by Geckwoistmeinauto at 4:49 PM on October 2, 2021 [1 favorite]

I wear briefs. If I'm in pants with a zipper and use a urinal, I always use the fly. When at home in sweats, or when it's possible/practical anywhere else, I sit even to pee. I tend to find standing while pulling down one or more elastic layers is clumsy and restricts the flow.

I was in college before I saw anyone actually unzip and unbuckle their pants to stand at a urinal. I've always found it clumsy and uncomfortable trying to keep unzipped, unbuckled pants up while standing, so it has never appealed to me.
posted by lhauser at 6:51 PM on October 2, 2021

[needle drops onto scratchy record]—...it all out! If you are listening to this record at home, you can follow along in the accompanying booklet, by turning the page each time you hear this tone: [SFX: ELECTRIC BUZZING SOUND] If you are in a movie theater, wait until intermission, and then practice these techniques in the bathroom that most fits your gender identity.

Ready? Let's begin. Now... approach the urinal, toilet, tree, bucket, wall, or your standard "pisspole"—like a Whitcombe's Stainless Steel PissPole™, sold at your finer urinary dry goods stores.

[A SOUSA MARCH BEGINS PLAYING IN BACKGROUND]

1) Assume the stance! Feet parallel to one another, facing the target, about fifteen inches apart. Belt undone! waistband undone! fly down! VERY GOOD! [SFX: ELECTRIC BUZZING SOUND]

2) Left thumb! between the underwear waistband and lower torso! I hear a question: boxers or briefs, you say, young penis-human? How about the underwear of the future: BOXER BRIEFS! [SFX: XYLOPHONE RUN as briefs and boxers merge into sparkly pair of boxer-briefs] The back of the left hand keeps the left flap and belt away from the imminent stream. Note that if the pockets are laden, the pinkie grabs a belt loop for extra outerpants support. [SFX: single glockenspiel note]

[SFX: ELECTRIC BUZZING SOUND]

3) The right-hand fingers slowly guiiiiide said dick OVER the waistband, at first like a prairie dog checking that all is clear. In most instances, there is little time before the all-clear signal has been sent; whereupon...

[SFX: ELECTRIC BUZZING SOUND]

4) ...The left thumb will usually accommodate a little extra room, so the balls (and sac container) can follow along for the ride. Now that the waistband is fully out of the way, things are a little more loose-and-free, and naturally pointed in the correct trajectory. For pissing. Now, go do your American duty and piss away in freedom. But always follow the local laws! A good tinkle is not worth prison time nor mandatory registration on a public list of sex offenders! [SFX: (note for production staff: consult outsourced prison sound effects library)] You're only here to take the piss, yes? Good!

[SFX: ELECTRIC BUZZING SOUND]

5) The teamed right forefinger and thumb now gently steers and guides the dick and stream at a target—imagined or real—while, at the same time, the back of the right hand is keeping right side of belt-and-flap at bay. Remember never to avert your eyes from the object you are imagining or actually pissing upon.

[SFX: ELECTRIC BUZZING SOUND]

6) Remember to shake well afterwards... BUT WAIT! [SFX: CAR TIRES SCREECHING] those last, lazy, latecomer spurts are always slow to the finish line.[SFX: GLOCKENSPIEL when the last drop hits the ceramic]

[SFX: ELECTRIC BUZZING SOUND]

... and the doing-back-up is twice as fast as the undoing: it's like putting your pants back on, but without the cumbersome inconvenience of having to thread clumsy legs through tunnel-like pantlegs! Now that's good time management AND hygiene!

NOW LET'S TURN THE RECORD OVER AND SEE HOW THE OTHER HALF LIVES!

[SFX: ELECTRIC BUZZING SOUND]

[needle scratch continues indefinitely because the automatic stylus arm hasn't been invented yet]


Hello. I hope you enjoyed my little play, depicting how I piss. I wear boxer briefs. When I was younger, I went commando. When I was a kid, I wore tighty-whiteys. I never use the fly-holes...

...except in situations of extreme duress, where you just have to run as quickly as you can to the nearest acceptable piss-spot. The activity was more like pulling hard on a tucked-away cord to activate the parachute, and then cringing slightly as the ballsack glances off the bottom-most zipper teeth. But usually if I gotta go that bad, I don't have the time or grace to take the steps. Such situations have included: during paintball; on a long road trip with no rest areas; whilst drunk in a city alleyway. It's much quicker but the chance for splash or injury is exponentially greater.

Thank you for reading my essay—it's been a great semester. What do you mean it's only october
posted by not_on_display at 9:58 PM on October 3, 2021 [1 favorite]

I'm very surprised by the people here who do not use the fly.
And I was once very surprised to see a man by the urinal who had unbuckled and unbottoned his pants to use it.
posted by jander03 at 8:14 AM on October 4, 2021 [2 favorites]

Team fly here.

Never saw anyone do the 'pull down the waistband' thing until the 1st time I visited the U.S.
posted by HiroProtagonist at 6:36 PM on October 4, 2021

Wow, people use the fly front? Hunh. I thought the fly front was some kind of weird garment joke.
posted by Don.Kinsayder at 9:45 PM on October 8, 2021

Are there some people in this thread implying that they undo their belt to use a urinal?

How else do you keep your shirt tucked in all day?

Why do we keep our shirts tucked in all day?

Edit: that's certainly chatfilter. Apologies.
posted by eotvos at 7:32 AM on October 9, 2021