What did it feel like when you first went into labor?

August 3, 2020 12:13 AM

I'm waiting for my second baby to be born. I was induced with the first so I have no idea what spontaneous labor is like.

There are tons of stories available about active labor, but it's hard to find women discussing how they found early labor. Did it feel like mild twinges to you? Was it obvious you were having contractions or did you think they might be Braxton Hicks? How long did it take you to progress to active labor?

Any and all first person accounts would be so appreciated and give me something to compare while I wait.

(My wife is asking this question, btw.)

posted by Paragon to Health & Fitness (30 answers total)

I had a yucky tired afternoon, where I was exhausted and needed to lie down on the couch for a few hours (for the first time since my first trimester). I had what felt like period cramps, really mild, in the late afternoon. Then my water broke in the evening. Then I went to the hospital for an emergency C section. While I was waiting for the OR, I felt what I could recognize as contractions: first actual pain, recognizable waves, etc. Of course, by this point, I knew I was in labor and so was more aware of what was going on. All in all I think I was in very early labor for about 6-8 hours without really realizing it?

GOOD LUCK HAVE FUN (to your wife, mostly, but you too!)
posted by athirstforsalt at 12:27 AM on August 3, 2020

I thought i had weird bloating/gas cramps. And then I realized it came in waves that were every 10 minutes or so. Over the course of about 6 hours they became closer together, lasted longer and stronger, until the contractions became fairly painful. At the beginning I was mostly fine in between each contraction, but as things progressed I only had time in the intervals to try to recover/prepare for the next one.
posted by HMSSM at 12:56 AM on August 3, 2020 [1 favorite]

I've had four babies. In each case the memorable quality of the beginning of labor was how unclear it was that labor was beginning. Just a vague crampy uncomfortableness, somewhat hard to distinguish from the constant and general uncomfortableness of the end of pregnancy.

You would think experience would help but it was on my fourth child where I had several "false alarms" and Braxton-Hicks series of contractions that eventually faded and petered out rather than intensifying. This happened so much that by the day that turned out to be the day my youngest was born I was pretty dismissive of the contractions that were happening. I dismissively mentioned that the contractions I'd been having for days seemed a little stronger on the phone to my husband. He said maybe I should time them. When I timed them over the course of an hour they were VERY CONSISTENTLY coming every nine minutes. That went on for about two hours. During that time, although I did believe labor was finally beginning, it was all merely uncomfortable not painful, and I still thought maybe it would all peter out. Instead my water broke, we went to the birthing center and the baby was born within an hour. That last hour was painful, but nothing before it.

This was different from the previous 3 labors in which the painful parts were many hours.

My point is that it is possible to be in early labor and really not know. All that stuff people say about "OH YOU'LL KNOW" is not necessarily true. It is possible to be in something just like early labor that just goes nowhere. Don't let anybody make you feel "alarmist" or like you're "overreacting." If you think you might be in labor, you might in fact be in labor.

I'm sure that was extremely unhelpful and I wish I had better to tell you.
posted by Jenny'sCricket at 1:49 AM on August 3, 2020 [3 favorites]

I had my first baby about three weeks ago, so this is very fresh in my memory!

I actually went 12 days over my due date and was due to be admitted to hospital for an induction on the day I went into labour. I did experience Braxton Hicks contractions, but the most recent ones were more than a week before I gave birth. The day before I gave birth I just felt a heavy feeling in my abdomen, I had backache (but I’d felt that for three solid weeks) and I occasionally felt nauseated. Signs that I might be about to go into labour, but nothing concrete.

Then in the small hours of the day I gave birth, I woke up and fifteen minutes later I was having what felt like the worst period pains of my life in waves, every five minutes. I had been worried about not recognising signs of labour, but I knew these were - finally - contractions. I decided pretty quickly to get this checked out at the hospital and within an hour of the contractions starting I was determined to be 4cm dilated, so in active labour. I have no idea how long it took to go from 0cm to 4cm.

Incidentally, my waters did not break until I was almost fully dilated, by which time I’d been in the delivery room for hours and had had an epidural.
posted by Rissa at 2:05 AM on August 3, 2020 [4 favorites]

I am going to Nth, it was subtle at first. I had been growing more uncomfortable for many days, with pressure and cramps in my abdomen. Having fits of cramps every ten minutes or so really made me wonder. Once the contractions were around four minutes, my water broke. Until then, I still wasn't totally sure.
posted by Kalmya at 2:11 AM on August 3, 2020

It felt like increasingly bad period cramps, the kind that un-pregnant would give you period shits, then progressed to what i can only elegantly describe as feeling like i had to take a giant shit to the point where all shame and dignity gave way to an animal instinct to give in to the crampyness (which were contractions) and push it out no matter where no matter how.

I had 2 kids with no pain management and i think the latter sensation would be different with an epidural.
posted by WeekendJen at 3:23 AM on August 3, 2020 [2 favorites]

I actually remember thinking that I could *absolutely* tell the difference between these cramps and Braxton Hicks (which I experienced off and on for the two weeks prior), and being so relieved!! The main difference, as I recall, was that BH would subside if I took a bath or a hot shower --i.e. found a way to relax my whole body. With these cramps, nothing I did got rid of them, and within 6 hours they were regular (first every 8, then every 6, then every 5 minutes, etc.). I also had some back labor, so my back pain was pretty bad. Alone, I might not have realized it was labor, but onset was sudden for me and correlated with the cramps.
posted by correcaminos at 4:11 AM on August 3, 2020

First kid: in retrospect, I was feeling the contractions as lower back pain because he was sunny side up. At the time, the reason I went to the hospital was because I was bleeding a lot after sex and it was not even obvious to the doctor and nurses that I was in labor until things got really painful and I threw up a ton. That was 3.5 hours after the bleeding started and it took two hours from that point to get the baby out.

Second kid (yesterday): started like mild period cramps low in my belly. Timing showed they were 30-45 seconds, 5-6 minutes apart, which was regular enough to convince me they were real. Total time feeling contractions was 7.5 hours followed by 14 minutes of pushing.
posted by carolr at 4:13 AM on August 3, 2020

My only advice is that a first baby's birth is often very different from the second -- so the advice from first-time mothers may be less relevant.

I, like you, had an induced birth the first time, and I read all these books about early labor, etc. and was expecting the typical light early contractions. But instead, I felt absolutely nothing in early labor (slept through it), my whole labor was about an hour, and I gave birth in my bed because I thought it didn't hurt enough to be active labor as described by the books. (This was actually amazing, but no, you don't want that.) Later, the midwife said, oh yeah, this happens so often with second-time mothers.

So my advice would be to go to the hospital sooner, rather than later, if you feel anything like contractions. Worst case scenario, they send you home.
posted by caoimhe at 4:34 AM on August 3, 2020

I had a membrane strip the morning I went into labour, and then immediately went into a client call (!!). The rest of the day I just felt... pregnant? Maybe slightly crampy, but I was getting frequent cramps anyway, a bit uncomfortable, heavy and big. In retrospect that crampy pregnant feeling was early labour, because I woke up at 2am with what felt like one big long awful period pain. It took a while for it to resolve into distinct contractions. I do remember that the sensation felt so completely like I was about to take a huge shit and/or pee that the only place I felt okay was on the toilet, and even when we got to the hospital I only wanted to sit on the toilet. Ah, the dignified miracle of birth.
posted by nerdfish at 4:37 AM on August 3, 2020 [5 favorites]

This was many years ago (20 and 16) but both times I gave birth, my water broke and then contractions really kicked in much more intensely--a very clear demarcation of "now I'm in labor and the baby is coming out."
posted by Sublimity at 4:37 AM on August 3, 2020

I was induced with my first, but with my second, the night before she was born my belly just felt... different. Not twingy, not painful, but different. I realize how unhelpful this is, but it is what I remember from a year ago! I remarked on this before bed and it continued to feel different the next day, which then evolved into period cramps, then painful period cramps, then have-to-turn-off-the-TV contractions.
posted by teragram at 4:41 AM on August 3, 2020

My incredibly strong contractions never got closer than 11 minutes apart and as a result I almost had my second kid in the hospital parking lot. So don’t listen to the metric about your contractions having to be less than x minutes apart before heading in to the hospital.
posted by lydhre at 4:46 AM on August 3, 2020

There is really no way to tell Braxton-Hicks from mild labour pains, and not only that you may never know if some of the pains are really constipation happening at the same time as the uterine cramping.

My first kid I had "minor" contractions for days, ones that they told me were not Braxton-Hicks but they were so ineffectual that I dilated so slowly it took me from Tuesday until Sunday to be declared unable to give birth. I got fully dilated and the kid came down to the right place but that made no difference. Nothing happened after that except that I kept solidly have contractions and being in pain. I had a c-section.

With my second kid I had minor labour pains for a few hours, so when I realised that they were contractions and that I could be starting I put food in the slow cooker and started to do breathing and belly dance moves to control the pain. Around when the bone-in blade roast was out of the slow cooker and in the fridge I decided we had better get it checked out, even though the pains were not getting much closer together or all that intense. So we went in to the hospital. It was a wee bit of challenge doing the breathing while walking around in public rather than just being in my bedroom but it was doable. The told me to put a Johnny shirt on. I did, and then much to my surprise I discovered I was screaming as I stood there just outside the cubicle door. A nurse ran in, stuck a gloved hand up and yelled for a doctor who was walking past in the hall.

"Do I have time to wash up?" the doctor asked.

"No!!"

I was fully dilated and the baby was on his way down. ...And then just like the first one the baby stuck and was not going to come down without some significant assistance. They had to use forceps. There had been no need to hurry after all.

The second baby ended up overall less painful than the first, as well as happening much faster.

The third one was the only one that actually happened without some doctor getting a good grip and tugging. The second and the third both took around the same amount of time, but with the third one I went to the hospital as soon as I was sure it might be real labour, as they were quite insistent about that.


Hey, congratulations, and tell your little one welcome to the world from me when they get here.
posted by Jane the Brown at 4:54 AM on August 3, 2020 [1 favorite]

With my first child I was woken at 6:30 with a shooting pain in my cervix. I cleaned out the fridge and we returned videos on the way...arrived at the hospital 8cm dilated and not that long to go although then it went tits up.

With my second child I was wandering Home Depot having Braxton-Hicks, went home, it was Saturday, my husband was working and I was annoyed, I joked with him that I was in labour and then timed my Braxton-Hicks and found they were 2 min apart. I called L&D and they said come down. It took my husband 40 min to get off his conference call, 20 min to get to the hospital. I was talking and laughing, they hooked me up to the monitor and the contractions looked tiny. They were going to send me home and asked if an intern could do an internal exam for learning purposes and I was like: sure! So she gloved up, got a funny look and told the OB there was something there...it was a bulging sac and I was fully dilated, had my child 25 minutes later.

Third child: Was hospitalized 3 times for threatened pre-term labour. The actual time he was born I'd just come off bedrest at 34 weeks and was lying on the couch after a birthday dinner, trying to relax. My husband looked at me and said "you're in labour again." I said "no I'm not, I just ate too much at dinner!" He said "I know you're in labour because you always say you aren't when you are."

Yeah, had the baby the next day (labour stalled out briefly overnight.)

None of this is especially typical but I think the lesson is...time your 'squeezes' and when they are regular OR you are starting to think about pain, it's never really a bad thing to go get it checked out. It might feel embarrassing to go home after a false alarm but it beats a parking lot delivery.
posted by warriorqueen at 4:56 AM on August 3, 2020

My early labor felt like a combo of menstrual cramps and needing to poop, for several hours before it was clear that they were contractions (at 41 weeks I was sure HOPING it was labor.)
posted by songs about trains at 5:23 AM on August 3, 2020 [2 favorites]

My water broke 2.5 weeks before my due date. I had no indication labor was starting. I didn't have my first contraction until almost 12 hours later and as other described it felt like a wave.
posted by turtlefu at 5:33 AM on August 3, 2020

I was told again and again "if you are wondering if they are contractions, then they are NOT, because you'll KNOW".

So I ignored the waves of tightness that didn't really hurt because I wanted to finish the novel I was reading. I finished it at 2am, went to sleep, and woke up an hour later with my water broken and the baby imminent. I only had half an hour of bad contractions and then my daughter was born, nearly in a cab but we made it to the hospital in time for her to be caught by a medical professional.
posted by gaspode at 5:50 AM on August 3, 2020

I just had my first three months ago! For me, I had mild twinges all day on a Monday, gradually started getting stronger on Tuesday. I timed them at 10 minutes apart during my office hours on Tuesday morning and they were just uncomfortable enough to make it had to focus on grading student work during them, like mild period cramps. That evening, my husband and I went for the 3-mile walk we had been doing throughout the pregnancy and I couldn't carry on a conversation during the contractions. At this point we began to think this might be it. The pain was like bad period cramps by bedtime. I slept a little, then timed them around midnight at 4 minutes apart. We got to the hospital at 1:30 am and the contractions were 3 minutes apart and I was at 7 cm. My son was born at 7:30 that morning.
posted by abeja bicicleta at 6:21 AM on August 3, 2020

With my first, I had been having more Braxton-Hicks contractions at night in the last week or two of my pregnancy. If I got up, they would go away soon afterwards. When I went into labor, the contractions started in the middle of the night and felt just like the Braxton-Hicks contractions I had been having, but they didn't go away even after I got up and sat at the computer for a while. That was what told me this was probably the start of labor. They gradually began coming more frequently, but it wasn't a steady progression - they'd get closer together, then space out again for a while, then get closer together again, with the time between them during the most frequent periods gradually getting shorter. It was more than 12 hours from the time they started until they were coming frequently enough that it seemed like it was time to go the hospital. Once I got to the hospital it was about another 12 hours before I gave birth.

With my second, I didn't have the increasingly frequent and strong Braxton-Hicks contractions leading up to labor. I had no indication at all that labor was close, didn't feel different in any notable way, but in the middle of the night I was having trouble sleeping (not unusual during late pregnancy) so I got up and sat at the computer doing some web browsing and while I was sitting there I started feeling mild contractions, like Braxton-Hicks. They kept coming and gradually got closer together and a bit stronger, but most of them still weren't very strong by the time we went to the hospital in the morning (maybe 8 hours after they started?) It was the spacing between them that told me it was time to go. I had the baby within a couple of hours of getting to the hospital.
posted by Redstart at 6:34 AM on August 3, 2020

Lot of years ago but first and second kids both had several days of prodromal labor - mild and not so mild contractions and then they'd stop and then kick in again. First kid was a failed induction that ended up a c-section after 36 hours of labor. Second kid was a long 35 hours but again slow, on-again, off-again start. Third kid - woke up to a BIG contraction and he arrived 5 hours later of high intensity full on-labor with no slow ramp-up.

Good luck and congrats!
posted by leslies at 6:55 AM on August 3, 2020

First kid: first indication of labor was my water breaking. It took another 7 hours before I felt any contractions - and then they felt like intermittent lower back pain rather than classic period cramps. I never really felt much in the way of cramping until I was in active labor and not much even then. Just the worst back pain of your life.

Second kid: very similar except this time I felt the lower back pain first and water broke only when I was pushing.

With the first, I kept second-guessing myself because it felt so different from classic labor and only arrived in the hospital already at 9 cm (after being sent home initially). With my second, I was pretty sure things were happening from the first twinge of back pain.

So just know, you may not feel the classic contractions that you hear about - anything intermittently painful that doesn't go away no matter what you do could be contractions too.
posted by peacheater at 7:28 AM on August 3, 2020

Needing to poop and poop and poop and poop.

After all the poop was out, regular contractions that escalated in frequency, duration, and intensity until baby!
posted by Temeraria at 9:04 AM on August 3, 2020 [1 favorite]

If the contractions are regular-ish is a good indication, even if they're 5 minutes apart for a while, and then they change to seven, and then back to five - as long as they stay at one interval for a bit, they're less likely to be BH.

Plus your system is full of prostaglandins in early labour, so GI stuff plus regular cramps/contractions are a good indicator.

You are also allowed to check your own cervix. I wouldn't recommend trying to measure your level of dilation yourself, because it's notoriously tricky/subjective, and you likely won't get the same measurement your healthcare provider will give, but there is no rule against putting your fingers in your vagina in late pregnancy, and feeling if things are tightly closed or not. Just remember you can be at 1-2 cm for days before more active labour starts.
posted by unstrungharp at 11:50 AM on August 3, 2020

I had a really really bad backache overnight. Went to the doctor in the morning and I was 5cm. She was breech so I think that’s why the I only had back pain and not contractions. Needless to say I had to straight to the hospital for my c-section.
posted by gryphonlover at 12:07 PM on August 3, 2020

Response by poster: (from my wife)

All of these answers have been fantastic and make me feel a lot more confident and relaxed. Thanks to everyone who shared, hopefully baby will be here soon!
posted by Paragon at 2:38 AM on August 4, 2020

There is really no way to tell Braxton-Hicks from mild labour pains

This is my experience. With my first, I didn't have any Braxton-Hicks. Woke up around 5am with some weird abdominal aches and when I felt them gradually worsening and starting to hurt over about 3 hours, I figured I was in labour so we headed to the hospital.

With the second, I had Braxton-Hicks from about 29 weeks. Sometimes they were timeable at avery 2 min, 30 seconds so I ended up at the hospital several times having that checked. By the end of the pregnancy I was ignoring them. Woke up with them one day (again at 5am), and similar my my first experience, once they began getting increasingly stronger (progressed a lot faster the second time) and a teeny bit painful, I figured it was time to head to the hospital. I guess I'm pretty textbook. Both times, I walked up to the nurses station and said I *think* I'm in labour, because there was no way to be sure without being checked.

This is obviously not a rule of thumb but I think for most people, a 'weird' back or abdominal sensation that is strengthening (most likely become increasingly uncomfortable) over a few hours is probably your signal.

In both cases, the pain, while mild, was kind of exciting and even funny to me. Until it most certainly wasn't a source of humor anymore :)

Congrats! Best wishes!
posted by kitcat at 2:41 PM on August 4, 2020

Response by poster: Baby arrived this morning after a 2 hour labour. Thank you all for sharing, it really made a difference (especially when the real contractions began in the middle of gridlocked traffic).
posted by Paragon at 3:35 AM on August 5, 2020 [10 favorites]

Wow! Congratulations!
posted by kitcat at 6:48 AM on August 5, 2020 [1 favorite]

Wonderful news! Congratulations to the family and welcome to Baby Paragon!
posted by Sublimity at 5:19 AM on August 6, 2020 [1 favorite]