Why do I ejaculate more quickly in some positions than others?
March 15, 2006 7:12 AM   Subscribe

Why do I ejaculate more quickly in some positions than others?

My wife particularly enjoys sex when I enter her vagina from the rear. I guess this has something to do with her g-spot, my penis pushing in and forward on the front of her vagina in a way that isn't possible in the missionary position. I don't particularly enjoy this position because I don't seem to get the full range of penis-vagina contact I experience with the missionary position, but more importantly, this position seems to make me ejaculate much more quickly.

That's the real basis of my question, what about this position makes me ejaculate more quickly in spite of the fact that I actually find less enjoyable than other positions?

The nearest I can figure is that it has something to do with the position of my penis. Due to height and other differences, when entering her from the rear, I must pull my penis a little down and forward, pulling against the natural arc of my erection and seemingly tugging on some interior plumbing, and when I'm in her, all the contact seems to either right at the base of my penis, or at the top of the head. In spite of the fact that this feels somewhat strained to me, my prostate wakes up almost instantly and I'm ejaculating almost before I know it. Fortunately, my wife's experience is sufficiently intense that she'll easily have an orgasm during this time.

This is nothing like I experience with the missionary position, where I get a full range of contact with her vagina for the full length and circumference of my penis.

What could be going on internally to make his happen? I'm thinking it has to do with the tugging that occurs when bending my penis to accomodate the position. I presume we may need to work on better positioning or something.
posted by anonymous to Health & Fitness (14 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
This is just a guess, but the way you're pushing your penis down might be putting pressure on your prostate, stimulating the nerves there: imagine a lever with the fulcrum at the base of your erection.

An unsolicited suggestion: try a spooning position for rear-entry. You can control the angle better, and might get improved contact and less strain.
posted by S.C. at 7:24 AM on March 15, 2006

There's a lot more nerve endings in the head. Thus, the increased "contact at the top of the head" is likely the "difficulty," if you could call it that.
posted by Ironmouth at 7:26 AM on March 15, 2006

The physical sensation may not be as pleasurable as the missionary, but the visuals may push you over the edge.

i.e. Doggy style can be hawt!
posted by lalochezia at 7:37 AM on March 15, 2006

A sex worker acquaintance says that she always strongly encourages guys to do her doggy style so that they'll come (and leave) faster. So it's a known fact, and not just you.
posted by crabintheocean at 7:37 AM on March 15, 2006

The front of the penis glans, which is usually quite sensitive, is stimulated more firmly and with greater friction during most rear-entry positions compared with classic missionary positions. You could try desensitising it with some topical anaesthetics. Any sex store has a wide range of creams, oils, lubes, and so on with benzocaine/etc mixed in.
posted by meehawl at 7:51 AM on March 15, 2006

Actually, I've seen "male genital desensitizer" on the shelves (admittedly, the lowest shelves!) of most US drugstores. I doubt you'll find any nice cherry flavours there though - they seem to go for the functional angle exclusively.
posted by meehawl at 8:03 AM on March 15, 2006

And remember, of course, if you're going to use something like that... WEAR A CONDOM. You don't want her all numbed up, too.

My question would be, if you're both enjoying yourselves, what's the problem? Why fix what ain't broke?

That said, try taking your time. Unless we're talking two thrusts and it's over, you have time to pull out, calm down a bit, then dive on in again. Doggystyle is a great position for going down on a woman, so you could easily thrust a bit, pull out when you're getting too excited, replace your cock with your fingers and suck on her clit for a bit until you're ready to, ahh... reinsert. Also try simply fucking her like that, let yourself ejaculate, then let your fingers and tongue do the walking until you're hard again, and go for round two.

This is why I'm jealous of women. Nobody wants it more than a woman who's just had it. And can have it again, and again, and again. No fair, I say!
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 8:28 AM on March 15, 2006

I don't have any SCIENCE! to back it up, but it always seems "tighter" to me, hence more stimulation.
posted by AllesKlar at 9:06 AM on March 15, 2006

If my experiences are any indication, the reason you ejaculate more quickly in a given position is because your wife particularly enjoys that position. I find very few things more arousing than the female sexual response, doubly so that of someone I care about.
posted by majick at 9:13 AM on March 15, 2006

"full range of penis-vagina contact" is one of the funniest phrases ive heard in a long while. did you get hard while writing this question?
posted by petsounds at 9:59 AM on March 15, 2006

dirtynumbangelboy - this explains your name!
posted by crabintheocean at 10:08 AM on March 15, 2006

(This doesn't directly answer your question — OMG someone haul my ass to MeTa — but there are ways of dealing with the height difference.

It sounds from your description like you're taller than her. And I'm guessing, since most people do it this way, that you've been arranging yourselves so that her legs are apart and yours are together. That just accentuates the height difference — your long legs are running straight up and down, her short legs are running diagonally.

Try reversing that. Kneel with your legs apart. Have her kneel between your knees, with her legs together, and sort of "sit back" onto your penis. Spreading your legs will lower your pelvis, and letting her keep her legs together will raise hers.

That should help even out your height difference. And FWIW, it may also help solve your problem with quick ejaculation, especially if it's being caused by too much pressure on your glans. On the other hand, if majick is right and you're getting off on getting your wife off, changing position won't help — but at least you'll be getting off, and getting her off, with more comfortable posture.)
posted by nebulawindphone at 10:40 AM on March 15, 2006

Oh, you weren't the one who said about the gel. :(
posted by crabintheocean at 10:54 AM on March 15, 2006

The main reason is because there is a comparatively high amount of pressure being placed on your frenelum in this position. The frenelum is the piece of skin immediately below the urethra on the underside of the glans, and it is sometimes referred to as the "male g-spot".
posted by fvox13 at 11:03 AM on March 15, 2006

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