This is not a nap!
January 30, 2020 4:12 PM Subscribe
Sometimes my body thinks I'm napping, but I'm trying to get a full night of sleep.
If I'm extremely tired and fall asleep immediately upon going to bed, I will wake up 3 hours later and will be awake for the rest of the night. My body feels all heavy and gross, too, like I've just had a too-long nap. The cycle repeats until finally it's the weekend and I can get an actual nap in and break the over-tired cycle. Does this happen to anyone else? Did you figure out how to fix it?
This has been a problem for decades. It just seems to be how my body works. But, how can I convince it that I need to sleep for 7 or 8 hours, not 3?
I go to bed at the same time every night. If I'm not exhausted it takes me about an hour and a half to fall asleep (anxiety) and then I'm out until my alarm goes off. If I am exhausted I fall asleep immediately, and then I wake up 3 hours later.
Right now I'm exhausted because the people who live upstairs from me keep waking me up around 1-2 am. Then I get pissed off and can't fall back asleep. Then the faux-nap cycle starts. I'm working on solving the neighbor problem, but it make not be fixable. (I have earplugs and white noise machines etc. and am not looking for advice about noise or my neighbors.)
Basically if I am exhausted at all I can't get a full night's sleep. If I exercise too much, or if I'm really sick, I won't sleep more than 3 hours a night.
I practice good sleep hygiene (no screens an hour before bed, totally dark and cool room, sleep mask, no caffeine after noon, I take magnesium supplements, I get exercise and sunlight during the day) and have seen a sleep specialist. I have adverse reactions to every sleeping pill I've tried, including Benedryl, so those aren't an option. Melatonin does nothing for me. I'm allergic to lavender.
I've tried pushing my bedtime back 1.5 hrs in case my exhausted mind gets confused by falling asleep earlier than normal. Doesn't work. Any ideas? I'm so tired.
If I'm extremely tired and fall asleep immediately upon going to bed, I will wake up 3 hours later and will be awake for the rest of the night. My body feels all heavy and gross, too, like I've just had a too-long nap. The cycle repeats until finally it's the weekend and I can get an actual nap in and break the over-tired cycle. Does this happen to anyone else? Did you figure out how to fix it?
This has been a problem for decades. It just seems to be how my body works. But, how can I convince it that I need to sleep for 7 or 8 hours, not 3?
I go to bed at the same time every night. If I'm not exhausted it takes me about an hour and a half to fall asleep (anxiety) and then I'm out until my alarm goes off. If I am exhausted I fall asleep immediately, and then I wake up 3 hours later.
Right now I'm exhausted because the people who live upstairs from me keep waking me up around 1-2 am. Then I get pissed off and can't fall back asleep. Then the faux-nap cycle starts. I'm working on solving the neighbor problem, but it make not be fixable. (I have earplugs and white noise machines etc. and am not looking for advice about noise or my neighbors.)
Basically if I am exhausted at all I can't get a full night's sleep. If I exercise too much, or if I'm really sick, I won't sleep more than 3 hours a night.
I practice good sleep hygiene (no screens an hour before bed, totally dark and cool room, sleep mask, no caffeine after noon, I take magnesium supplements, I get exercise and sunlight during the day) and have seen a sleep specialist. I have adverse reactions to every sleeping pill I've tried, including Benedryl, so those aren't an option. Melatonin does nothing for me. I'm allergic to lavender.
I've tried pushing my bedtime back 1.5 hrs in case my exhausted mind gets confused by falling asleep earlier than normal. Doesn't work. Any ideas? I'm so tired.
It sort of happens to me. What I do is get up, pee, walk around for 5 minutes and then take another 3 hour nap. Sometimes I read a few pages of a book or a magazine to fake that I am up and getting tired. I am sleeping for about 6 out of 6.5 hours.
posted by AugustWest at 4:33 PM on January 30, 2020 [1 favorite]
posted by AugustWest at 4:33 PM on January 30, 2020 [1 favorite]
Can you take a 20 min nap earlier in the evening ( or even “rest your eyes” for 20 min)? That might trick your body into being more rested and not have the actual sleep be so disrupted.
posted by raccoon409 at 5:20 PM on January 30, 2020 [2 favorites]
posted by raccoon409 at 5:20 PM on January 30, 2020 [2 favorites]
For me this is definitely a sign of depression. I had this for a while about a year ago, then I started taking lexapro. I eventually had to stop taking lexapro because it made me too sleepy and forgetful all the time but it basically fixed the problem.
posted by selfmedicating at 5:39 PM on January 30, 2020
posted by selfmedicating at 5:39 PM on January 30, 2020
Ok this is exactly my life. My industrial strength ear plugs and better air flow (ie not getting too hot) helped but not totally. I think it is emotional- like the neighbor constantly waking me up enrages me and then my system is 'on alert' for the next disturbance. Also the depression/anxiety probably fits too. The only thing I can do is go to bed MUCH earlier than I want to, jam my ear plugs in, and hope the additional time lying down adds up to the appropriate amount of total sleeping/resting time. Sorry. It's SO annoying.
posted by bquarters at 5:57 PM on January 30, 2020 [2 favorites]
posted by bquarters at 5:57 PM on January 30, 2020 [2 favorites]
There is an old antidepressant called Trazodone. It's pretty much only prescribed for sleep because it's a pretty crappy AD. It might be an option.
Are you doing anything to treat the anxiety?
I listen to podcasts to keep my stupid brain from stressing about everything going on in the world.
Good luck. Sleep problems suck.
posted by kathrynm at 7:14 PM on January 30, 2020 [3 favorites]
Are you doing anything to treat the anxiety?
I listen to podcasts to keep my stupid brain from stressing about everything going on in the world.
Good luck. Sleep problems suck.
posted by kathrynm at 7:14 PM on January 30, 2020 [3 favorites]
Yeah, ditto on Delayed Sleep Phase Disorder. Left to my own vices I'll go to bed about 4 hours later every day. Trying to force a regular 24 hour schedule only works for about a week before I'm miserable again. Also, If your getting older, there's a lot more of only needing 6 hours of sleep or so. And a lot more waking up after 3 hours, taking a leak, reading the paper or watching some TV and then going back to bed for another 3 hours. At least for me.
If you can, I'd say try experimenting a bit. When I had to do the 8 hours work, 8 personal, 8 sleep... I'd still rotate a bit and would be up for 8 hours, go to work, come home and to bed. And slowly that moved to waking up and going to work, coming home and being up for 8 hours before sleeping. And a couple rough days when I really wanted to go to bed halfway through work.
Some people just don't do 24 hour days. Some prefer to sleep during the day and be awake at night. This all can change as you age and sometimes that 8 hours a night same time every day sleep hygiene regularity just doesn't work anymore.
posted by zengargoyle at 11:30 PM on January 30, 2020
If you can, I'd say try experimenting a bit. When I had to do the 8 hours work, 8 personal, 8 sleep... I'd still rotate a bit and would be up for 8 hours, go to work, come home and to bed. And slowly that moved to waking up and going to work, coming home and being up for 8 hours before sleeping. And a couple rough days when I really wanted to go to bed halfway through work.
Some people just don't do 24 hour days. Some prefer to sleep during the day and be awake at night. This all can change as you age and sometimes that 8 hours a night same time every day sleep hygiene regularity just doesn't work anymore.
posted by zengargoyle at 11:30 PM on January 30, 2020
The same with me. Doctor gave me Nortriptyline and that helps tons. I've been on it a few years and have no noticeable side effects.
posted by james33 at 4:47 AM on January 31, 2020
posted by james33 at 4:47 AM on January 31, 2020
I went through a long period of waking at 2 a.m. until 5:30 or so... just a little bit before the alarm went off, and woke up again feeling like a bag of dirt. Turns out that's what I do when I'm under-hydrated. Given you find the problem worse when you're sick or exercising, I wonder if that's playing into for you as well. Give drinking a LOT more (not too late in the day!) a whirl. Can't hurt. Hope it helps.
posted by kate4914 at 5:45 AM on January 31, 2020
posted by kate4914 at 5:45 AM on January 31, 2020
Do you know about two phase sleep? this is a pretty biologically normal sleep pattern.
This happens to me when I'm anxious, but I treat it as normal when I can. I get up, have a cup of chamomile tea and a snack, write a little, then go lie back down. A teacher in sixth grade study skills class told us that just lying in bed restfully can get you a little bit of what you need from sleep. I'm not sure if it's true, but I try not to really fret about whether I'll sleep or not. I just chill out in bed, and usually I do sleep, anyway.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 7:21 AM on January 31, 2020 [1 favorite]
This happens to me when I'm anxious, but I treat it as normal when I can. I get up, have a cup of chamomile tea and a snack, write a little, then go lie back down. A teacher in sixth grade study skills class told us that just lying in bed restfully can get you a little bit of what you need from sleep. I'm not sure if it's true, but I try not to really fret about whether I'll sleep or not. I just chill out in bed, and usually I do sleep, anyway.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 7:21 AM on January 31, 2020 [1 favorite]
Came in to mention two phase sleep as well (though I'd forgotten the term, thanks PhoBWanKenobi!)
When I have this going on I find it's usually better to get up and do something that isn't especially interesting for a while and then get a second "nap". It's best to avoid blue light during this time period, perhaps by using some tinted lenses.
posted by yohko at 6:12 PM on January 31, 2020
When I have this going on I find it's usually better to get up and do something that isn't especially interesting for a while and then get a second "nap". It's best to avoid blue light during this time period, perhaps by using some tinted lenses.
posted by yohko at 6:12 PM on January 31, 2020
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posted by WalkerWestridge at 4:29 PM on January 30, 2020 [2 favorites]