The Price of a Good Number
October 30, 2019 1:16 PM Subscribe
I've had the same phone number for a decade, but before me it apparently belonged to "Jay", who has debts. I have had to endure Jay's debt collectors calling me this whole time. I finally learned Jay's company and last name yesterday because one of them texted me with details. Is there any way to make these calls stop now that I have this information?
I have pretty fragile mental health and ten years of scammy unsolicited phone calls do not impact this well. Also in the past I have done things like purchase a device with warranty at an electronics store and when I gave my number, an alert popped up telling the sales person not to sell the device to the person with this number because of their unpaid bills - I had to prove that I was me and not Jay.
Jay apparently has an LLC with their family in the next city over - we are in Washington State. They are in their thirties like me. I'm not interested in punishing anybody for having debts - I am very much on the side of capitalism is inherently evil, but also I do have to live in this world as it is. All I want is for this debt, which has clearly been shuffled from company to company, and now seems it will impact this LLC according to the collector who texted me, to have not my phone number associated with it. Is there any way to do this?
I have my number from Ting, which is part of Sprint, I believe. I don't know if that makes any difference. Jay has a social media presence and I could reach out to them - I don't know if they're even aware of this debt. I am very fortunate in that I have little experience with debt, but I have worked meticulously to make sure this is the case and can't just like, magically pay it off. I really want to keep my number.
This is a small but thorny issue. Thank you for any advice you may have. If there isn't a good route I will most likely just continue to endure as is, but if there's some administrative bureaucratic thing I can do or if doing nothing could actually harshly backfire on me or Jay or Jay's business I would like to know.
I have pretty fragile mental health and ten years of scammy unsolicited phone calls do not impact this well. Also in the past I have done things like purchase a device with warranty at an electronics store and when I gave my number, an alert popped up telling the sales person not to sell the device to the person with this number because of their unpaid bills - I had to prove that I was me and not Jay.
Jay apparently has an LLC with their family in the next city over - we are in Washington State. They are in their thirties like me. I'm not interested in punishing anybody for having debts - I am very much on the side of capitalism is inherently evil, but also I do have to live in this world as it is. All I want is for this debt, which has clearly been shuffled from company to company, and now seems it will impact this LLC according to the collector who texted me, to have not my phone number associated with it. Is there any way to do this?
I have my number from Ting, which is part of Sprint, I believe. I don't know if that makes any difference. Jay has a social media presence and I could reach out to them - I don't know if they're even aware of this debt. I am very fortunate in that I have little experience with debt, but I have worked meticulously to make sure this is the case and can't just like, magically pay it off. I really want to keep my number.
This is a small but thorny issue. Thank you for any advice you may have. If there isn't a good route I will most likely just continue to endure as is, but if there's some administrative bureaucratic thing I can do or if doing nothing could actually harshly backfire on me or Jay or Jay's business I would like to know.
Unfortunately, I don't think there's much you can do--I've had the exact same problem except with Wanda. I found out her real details because a year after I got the number, the school district called to complain about her son's behavior. A year after that, her cousin called about their family reunion. Later, I got a text complaining about the family reunion. I've had the same number now for eleven years and Wanda apparently still owes money, but I only hear about once a month. I think Wanda kept giving out my number for years after it was no longer hers.
My latest idea is to block all numbers from certain area codes, but that doesn't help separate the number from being linked in different places.
posted by betweenthebars at 1:34 PM on October 30, 2019 [2 favorites]
My latest idea is to block all numbers from certain area codes, but that doesn't help separate the number from being linked in different places.
posted by betweenthebars at 1:34 PM on October 30, 2019 [2 favorites]
Response by poster: Just to clarify, the majority of these phone calls do not last past me saying "I am not Jay, there is no Jay at this number." Usually I then quickly get hung up on. That's why it's taken me ten years to even know Jay's last name. I have never had a bill erroneously sent to me or had much detail at all. Just many many robo calls and human debt collectors calling relentlessly.
posted by Mizu at 1:35 PM on October 30, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by Mizu at 1:35 PM on October 30, 2019 [1 favorite]
Do you have an iPhone? The newest iOS has a feature that allows you to send unknown numbers straight to voicemail.
posted by ancient star at 1:38 PM on October 30, 2019 [17 favorites]
posted by ancient star at 1:38 PM on October 30, 2019 [17 favorites]
There are many apps (I use Should I Answer?) that will allow you to block unknown numbers. I am much happier and calmer now that I have blocked everything from someone not in my Contacts list.
posted by suelac at 1:47 PM on October 30, 2019 [3 favorites]
posted by suelac at 1:47 PM on October 30, 2019 [3 favorites]
One of my first AskMe's was a similar question! Maybe the answers there can help a little.
posted by General Malaise at 2:04 PM on October 30, 2019
posted by General Malaise at 2:04 PM on October 30, 2019
The way these debts are sold and resold — often on Excel spreadsheets and passed through a morass of dodgy companies — makes it unlikely that you will ever get your number off every list out there. You can probably stop the worst offenders with the steps listed above, but that doesn’t mean a new worst offender won’t pop up when the list is once again propagated.
In your shoes I would concede the struggle and get a new number.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 2:24 PM on October 30, 2019 [11 favorites]
In your shoes I would concede the struggle and get a new number.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 2:24 PM on October 30, 2019 [11 favorites]
You've had the number 10 years and are still getting calls for someone else? The person(s) distributing this number are going to do absolutely nothing to remive your number from their list(s).
posted by Mitheral at 2:36 PM on October 30, 2019 [5 favorites]
posted by Mitheral at 2:36 PM on October 30, 2019 [5 favorites]
Yes, Tell Me No Lies is right about why it's happening and the reason it's difficult to stop. I would give up and get a new number myself if the calls were particularly bothersome.
posted by praemunire at 2:46 PM on October 30, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by praemunire at 2:46 PM on October 30, 2019 [2 favorites]
When you get these calls can you start with what contact info you do have instead of saying "I'm not Jay."? That might give them incentive to update their lists.
Would blocking the calls after you know they are a debt collector for Jay reduce the number? Is call screening an option? There are very few numbers I will answer if I don't recognize the number.
I know you said you prefer not to get a new number. I did have to get a new number once (after having the same number for 12 years and most of my adult life at that time) and it went much better than I thought it would. I think I sent some group texts or e-mails saying "update your contact info for me please" and never heard of anyone losing me. The downside of getting a new number is you still have the (high?) probability of getting another number for someone who is in debt.
That Should I answer app sounds intriguing.
posted by a non mouse, a cow herd at 2:53 PM on October 30, 2019
Would blocking the calls after you know they are a debt collector for Jay reduce the number? Is call screening an option? There are very few numbers I will answer if I don't recognize the number.
I know you said you prefer not to get a new number. I did have to get a new number once (after having the same number for 12 years and most of my adult life at that time) and it went much better than I thought it would. I think I sent some group texts or e-mails saying "update your contact info for me please" and never heard of anyone losing me. The downside of getting a new number is you still have the (high?) probability of getting another number for someone who is in debt.
That Should I answer app sounds intriguing.
posted by a non mouse, a cow herd at 2:53 PM on October 30, 2019
Check the Attorney General's website in your state for details, but it's illegal to harass a person for a debt they don't owe. Strange caller asks for Jay, ask them who they are, what agency they represent, tell them you're verifying the info on the web, and do that. Then tell them they are harassing you and if it continues, you'll sue, because you are not Jay. You can get a settlement in an agency keeps calling.
Somebody with my initial and last name is a debtor, debt collectors are jerkholes, so who cares.
posted by theora55 at 6:32 PM on October 30, 2019 [1 favorite]
Somebody with my initial and last name is a debtor, debt collectors are jerkholes, so who cares.
posted by theora55 at 6:32 PM on October 30, 2019 [1 favorite]
Also in the past I have done things like purchase a device with warranty at an electronics store and when I gave my number, an alert popped up telling the sales person not to sell the device to the person with this number because of their unpaid bills - I had to prove that I was me and not Jay.
For me, this is the point at which "change your phone number" starts to sound like the best option. Yes, this will cause you some inconvenience, but it's worth it. Push past the sunk cost fallacy. It's bad enough that you've been tortured with irritating phone calls for all of these years, but now this situation has leeched into your ability to conduct ordinary personal business.
posted by desuetude at 8:32 AM on October 31, 2019
For me, this is the point at which "change your phone number" starts to sound like the best option. Yes, this will cause you some inconvenience, but it's worth it. Push past the sunk cost fallacy. It's bad enough that you've been tortured with irritating phone calls for all of these years, but now this situation has leeched into your ability to conduct ordinary personal business.
posted by desuetude at 8:32 AM on October 31, 2019
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by Freedomboy at 1:28 PM on October 30, 2019 [4 favorites]